#when i cheerfully said i didn't celebrate it (or hanukkah either) you could see her brain short circuit in real time

[chthonic-cassandra]

Was trying to articulate something about dynamics of pressured disclosure in my professional world and how I've tried to make sense of that and hold the stance of people deserving privacy while also struggling with the deep aloneness that if I did disclose a lot of things about myself that would not be welcome to many people, but I think really the point is just something about safety and confidence and being secure in the knowledge that it's not anyone's business that I'm queer or mentally ill or a survivor or pagan or whatever and if they think I'm weird because of the way I dress or the things I do or don't participate in etcetera that's not my problem. And it's a tremendous relief to be in an environment where I am respected and valued enough that I can do that.

And also that's nice to embrace my religion and gothiness and particular relationship to femininity more and to not care that my physical presentation (clothes + shoes + hair + body hair + perfume + [lack of] makeup) is to totally illegible to most people.