#well now 50 minutes bc i've been writing this post

[moregraceful]

god bless al gore's tumblr there really is a place for everyone on here.

[raayllum]

so i deleted my poll & here's why bc it is both. sad, strange, and a little hilarious. for TLDR, skip all the way to the end

this is what it was gearing towards as of this afternoon & this is why it got weird.

for clarification, the poll was meant to investigate, because i was curious, how many people i had potentially influenced in my writing(s) about callum analysis wise. i actually expected option 2 to be the most common (aka that people already saw him that way) since that's what i've found in my circles; most of the other rayllum writers and shippers i've spoken to reached those conclusions themselves after S2 or S3, if not earlier. so option 1 being the most popular was the first big surprise, as was as many people picking "want to see the results"

here's where things go from surprising to weird. earlier this afternoon, the poll was sitting around 120-ish people and had been in that vein for most of the week since it was published, climbing maybe a few votes every day after the initial boom in a variety of the categories the first like day and a half.

then, steadily, over the course of 5-10 minutes, anywhere from 5 to 15 fresh votes flooded in... all to the same category of "nah i don't see him that way." which wasn't That strange, except

the fandom troll, who is notoriously obnoxiously loud about Not liking this interpretation of callum, also has a tendency of making sock blogs and sending anonymous asks to bait you over and over again, no matter how many times you block them. for Years.

then the number continued to steadily climb solely in that singular category, doubling and then tripling. now, i'm not going to say there couldn't be *check statistics* 50 people who don't see callum as being willing to sacrifice the world for his loved ones/help aaravos if rayla or ezran's lines were quit literally being held at knifepoint, But

When the poll started, I acknowledged the bias the poll would likely be prone to, as my followers - by virtue of following me and seeing and presumably agreeing with what I post - would probably skew in favour of the interpretation, and this was reflected in 6/7 days of the poll's backing, with 60-78% (roughly 70-80 people) of participants leaning towards a shared interpretation. "Nah I don't see him that way" also rose steadily in terms of votes throughout the week day by day, but never cleared more than 8-10 individual people (you're troopers, I respect you, and I hope having the "snake boi Callum" tag makes it easier for you to blacklist accordingly so that you can enjoy your fandom experience)

The Snake Boi Callum interpretation is popular enough in fandom that we actually had a fandom event for it a few months back, plenty of people participated who I felt I wasn't familiar with as well as people I knew I would, and the pieces of art/fic/playlists regularly got 50-150 notes. If there are 50+ people who disagree with said interpretation, they are, generally speaking, not a group who's often actually making things for the fandom at large in terms of fic, fanart, other forms of creation, and not a ton of meta weekly or monthly about the topic and/or outside of that general wheelhouse, either. The 'pro' side is conversely a lot more active; most of the people who have written fic about said topic(s) aren't even me, but other cool lovely talented individuals over the past 3-ish years

The initial wave of votes happened when I posted the poll in the "snake boi Callum," "Rayllum," "tdp," and "the dragon prince" tags to reach a broader audience beyond my more immediate active follower range (as like, 90% of my followers are lurkers, which - respect). This is when it would've made sense if there was going to be an uptick in "nah I don't see him that way" to build

Instead, it happened 6 days into the poll when it was already decently buried by tags, I had recently self-reblogged it back into my accordingly biased circles, and rather than having a general variety, only a singular category went up by close to 40 people in like 3 hours. I tend to gain anywhere from 6-10 followers a week (for example, this week was 6) so that also does not account for the massive leap in a very short amount of time

Therefore, keeping to roughly 125 votes for posterity, and when removing the originally 30-ish or so people who voted for "see results" (significantly less than the first category, but more than the second by a decent margin) as well as the real 10 votes for "nah, I don't see him that way," approximately 85 people voted explicitly in favour of Snake Boi Callum / one of the first two options in general, with my meta being cited as the biggest influence. This is also with me rounding up the numbers of the other categories to likely more than they were, but I want to account for the potential error of my memory, as I wasn't keeping track of where things were super specifically before it started to smell like meddling.

Again, it's not that there couldn't be 50 people with that opinion, it's just that 40 of them, Realistically, did not suddenly come out of the woodwork in the span of 1-2 hours to consecutively vote in only one (1) category 6 days after that would've actually, marginally, made sense in terms of tagging / seeing it in the main tags.

If you're wondering why I presented all my ~ evidence ~ it's because if not, I'd probably be labelled as a liar and/or dismissed (it's happened before, unfortunately) and honestly, it ended up being a little funny to dig into how presumably nuts this got.

TLDR;

Anyway if you ever feel like you're deeply insecure and worried that you're idiotically clout chasing, remember you will never be as Embarrassing as the guy who made close to 39 sock blogs in one afternoon to try and 'one up' someone over an opinion they have regarding a children's tv show protagonist who's believed biggest flaw is that he Loves His Friends.

better poll that cannot be screwed with will follow

[nathank77]

8/26/26

8:28 a.m Added to at 8:50 a.m

I took my normal dose with a tiny baby Sliver. Couldn't be more than .1... I prob took .8 or so. I fell asleep fast. Really fast. And I slept really well. I def didn't take a one but it was close. I took it cause I had anxiety about GED and I was scared I wouldn't sleep... and it was so tiny, I mean. It took restraint to not take a full 1 bc I knew my anxiety would be non-existent...

I don't think the dose is what knocked me out. I think that my thyroid is getting the full dose of Methimazole... today I just took my 3rd 5mg that didn't have l salvariuos mixed in.

It's weird but ever since I fixed my circadian rhythm which lined up with taking Methimazole without l salvariuos and making sure the bioavailabilty wasn't affecting it I've been sleeping easier... the first two nights took me 20 minutes or more.

But last night and the night before I was out like a light. I was so stupid for thinking xanax was losing it effectiveness.

Sure people who take it during the day time hours and force themselves to walk around and do life, stop feeling the sedating effects but if you take it for bedtime on your circadian rhythm and close your eyes. It will always sedate you and help you sleep.

Last night I fell asleep quicker than any other night in a long time. My eyes must have been closed for like 5 minutes maximum. How I wish that could be every night. I'd stop having so much anxiety about sleeping.

Of course I'm like it's bc you added the Sliver. It was so small so fucking tiny, I didn't even write it down for one of my 1mg days bc the original dose was like maybe .6 or .7 maybe .8 which is my normal. But I was thinking it was a .7..

I cut them chunky but they all are not equal. I'm just glad I slept well.

My hallucination has been awful this morning... worse part is I haven't touched weed in almost a week... I don't get it.. but yea I'm just thankful I slept. Today is the last day of barebones hardcore moshpit...

Imma try but not hold my hopes high. I got to shave my head/face and trim my beard. It may get held off until tomorrow if bo4 goes well. If not... well I'll do it today.

I'm still scared about GED but my mri appeared normal.... and according to reddit a lot of people get it and aren't recommended tepezza bc of the side effects. They just have to see a neurooptimalogist yearly or so and have mri and ct scans and have their eyes measured to make sure it doesn't come back or worsen.

I'm just going to remind myself all day my mri would have denoted inflammation in my optic nerve. Or excessive fatty tissue in my orbits. There would have been signs.

My anxiety brain is like bro they didn't look at it. I just doubt that, they were looking for any abnormalities and if it was abnormal they would have found it.

Despite that I do worry cause I know I was effected by GED.... the pictures I posted below don't lie.

Something that scares me about it is what if my eye lids don't close fully bc my eyes are more buldgy... or what if I do tepezza and my eye lids do meet right now and then they get droopy and i need surgery bc my eyes get pulled inwards..... SUICIDE is the answer to that what if. I'm terrified. I do think my eyes close all the way... but see these things I'm typing are true concerns for GED.

[jakesimfromstatefarm]

not jealous | jake sim

summary: jake sim is not a jealous person. at least that's what he tells himself. so why does he find himself going through your phone when a certain "bluejay park" decides to text you?

pairing: jake sim x y/n [ft. mentions of jay park]

genre: angst, fluff 

warnings: angst, cursing (very minimal), one slightly suggestive sentence, jake being cute, some more angst lol, slightly cheesy bc jake’s just too cute ugh

wc: 3.8k

a/n: ok i loved writing this, which is why i went on to almost 4k words LOL oops. but anyways, i love jake a little too much and this type of scenario has been running around in my head for a while now so i decided to put it into words. also i may have created this blog just so i could post this somewhere LMAO anyways yeah this was my first fic so hope you guys enjoyyyy <3

Jake Sim is not a jealous person.

At least that's what he tells himself. To be fair, in his past relationships, he never showed any jealously. Then again, he doesn't know if he can call those relationships, "relationships". Does a fifth grade relationship with a girl who he was once dared to kiss during a game of Truth or Dare in the basement of a classmate's house during their 11th birthday party count? He doesn't remember being jealous when the same girl was later dared to kiss his classmate, Sunghoon. (Funny enough, that's how the two boys came to be best friends 'til this day, but that's a story for another time.) 

But really, Jake doesn't think jealously is one of his traits, even if he's now almost 20 years old without any experience with love other than his current relationship with you and that short-lived romance in the fifth grade. (What was her name again? Jake would have to ask Sunghoon later.)

So he doesn't know what clicked in that brain of his that lead him to this current situation he was in. He doesn't know why he felt a little spark of anger in him when your phone, which you left right next to him on the couch while you went to take a shower, kept buzzing with texts from "bluejay park". He doesn't know why he couldn't kept his eyes distracted from the messages, although your phone was constantly lighting up because whatever it was Jay had to say to you, he would not shut up about it. He doesn't know why he questioned what your relationship with Jay was for a split second.

In fact, you're close with all of Jake's friends. That's one of his favorite things about you, you get along so well with all his friends you might as well replace Jake himself in the friend group. So he doesn't know what tells him to take a little glance at your phone—at the messages.

But he finds himself doing it anyways.

Hearing that the water in the shower was still running (you were always the type to take long showers), he quickly grabs your phone and scrolls through the lock screen just to find that he couldn't even read the messages since you had your notifications set so no one could read them unless the phone was unlocked (darn you and your settings!) Thankfully, Jake knew your passcode––and you knew his too––or he thought he did. Until the iPhone vibrated, telling him the passcode was wrong.

He must've entered it too fast or something. So he tries again.

And again.

And again.

Until the iPhone switches its screen to say: "iPhone is disabled. Try again in 5 minutes."

There's no way. You never change your password. And even if you did, you would tell him—you two even had each other's fingerprints saved into each other's phones in the past (you know, before the world decided that Apple's home button was too lame and decided to just completely get rid of it). If there was an option to save multiple faces for Face ID, you two would be that couple that saved each others faces in your own phones.

That being said, Jake sat there, your phone in hand, frozen. Why was your phone locked? Why was Jay texting you 10 texts per second? Why did he feel guilty about this entire situation?

He hears the shower switch off and in that moment, he swears he feels his heart beat just a little faster. He tells himself there's no way you'll be out before the 5 minutes are up. You followed a really meticulous skincare routine (one that Jake memorized by now) that took an extra 15 minutes of your time after each shower.

"Hey Jake?" Your voice calls out from the tiny bathroom door crack that you left open before you hopped in the shower, "Is my phone out there? Do you mind bringing it to me?"

Fuck.

Jake shifts on the couch. Taps his foot on the ground. Returns your phone to its original spot. Clears his throat.

"Don't you want to get dressed first?" he calls back, quite timidly.

He can hear you stop moving around in the bathroom. Probably telling yourself what an odd response that was. To be fair, it was an odd question, considering the fact that you two have been together for so long, it’s not like he hasn’t seen you undressed before...intentionally or not. 

Next thing he knows, the steam is rolling out of the bathroom door and you're stepping out in your towel, eyebrows raised.

"If you didn't want to get up from the couch, you could've just said so, you lazy butt," you smirk at him as you walk towards him and the couch, leaving a faint trail of water drops behind you. Jake's eyes follow your figure as you go to grab your phone and lift the screen towards yourself.

That's when he freezes. You do too.

You cock your head, as if asking yourself why it was disabled. He can hear the gears in your head turning.

"Jake, did you try to unlock my phone?"

He runs through all the possible excuses he could blurt out. Come on Jake, think of something! But he knows he can't lie to you.

Too many beats of silence pass by.

"Maybe," he finally says—or more like murmurs. He looks up to you like a child looking up at their mom, who just them caught stealing a cookie from the cookie jar. To his surprise, you don't show any hint of anger. A flash of confusion—and is that worry he sees?—crosses your face for a split second before you shrug and turn towards your room to change, dropping the subject. It was natural for you two to use each other's phones anyways. So then why did you have that look of worry?

Jake knows you well, a little too well. But that's what you love about him. He can easily read all your emotions. One of the many things he picked up from dating you for almost two years now. But why would you care if he tried to get into your phone? Why would that worry you? All the possibilities run through head and his own worry begins to increase. He trusts you. He does.

So then why does the thought bother him throughout the entire day? Why does he bring it up during dinner later that night, when you're both cuddled on your sofa, slurping take-out ramen while rewatching your favorite k-drama under the thick blanket that you always keep in your living room for nights like these?

"Huh? Of course I've heard from Jay today, we had that conversation about that stupid meme you boys kept laughing about in the groupchat we're all in, didn't we?" You answer him when he asks if you've heard from Jay lately. You sit up from your warm spot under Jake's arm to put your empty bowl on the coffee table in front of you. When you lean back, you look up at him,

"Why do you ask?"

"Oh, it's nothing, just wondering," he says, avoiding your eyes by keeping his own trained on the series currently playing on your TV. This would be your third time rewatching this series together. He would never complain to you though, he knows how much you love it and if he were being honest, he was secretly attached to the characters—not that he would ever tell you, he would never hear the end of it from you and the boys.

"You're being weird. Just tell me, or did you forget that I can practically read your mind," you say with a giggle and shove to his side, the one you were currently warmly cuddled into. Jake wasn't the only one who learned how to read emotions; you could read him just as well as he could read you. And like you, that's one of the many things he loved about you. But maybe not in this case.

He toyed around with the contents inside his ramen bowl with his chopsticks.

"I just..." God, how does he word this? Why was he having trouble explaining it? You were the easiest person to talk to. To him, you were the only person he could tell everything to.

"Jaywastextingyouabunchearlier," he blurts out quickly, but not quickly enough for you to miss it.

He feels you shift under his arm. He feels the air in the room shift. Tension.

"What?" Now you're sitting upright, legs criss-crossed in front of you on the couch but turned, so your body is completely facing him. He mirrors you, sitting up to put his ramen bowl next to yours on the surface, but he stays facing the TV.

"Your phone kept going off because of him when you were showering," he says with a little more confidence. But inside, he was nervous as hell, the same nervous as when he asked you out for the first time many moons ago. But it's too late to back out now, he brought it up first, anyways. Guess we're having this conversation now, good going Jake!

"Is that why you tried unlocking my phone earlier? I mean I thought you were just trying to leave selfies on my phone like you always do but you were trying to read my texts?" You question, slightly raising your soft voice. He doesn't know how to react, he hates confrontation.

"It wasn't like that, Jay just kept spamming you and like I—why was he even texting you in the first place? Then your phone got disabled because you changed your password, which you never do by the way, so I–"

"I changed it because my little sister kept getting into my phone when I went to visit my family yesterday! Did you really think I was hiding something from you? You know I can text whoever I want, right? You don't own me."

Okay so now he's managed to make you angry. Good going Jake, part 2!

"Okay but what does Jay need from you so bad that he has to send you like 50 messages at once?" He's standing now. So are you, eyebrows furrowed together as you collect your bowls from the table.

Standing there, bowls in hand, you say, "Jake, that's none of your business! It wasn't even that big of a deal, I don't know why you felt the need to nosy around."

"Well, if he's texting you non-stop, then obviously it's a big deal! We wouldn't even be having this conversation if you would just tell me what you guys were talking about," he murmurs back, eyes narrowing. You scoff as you trail into your kitchen. He follows behind and stops at the other side at your kitchen island as you place the dirty dishes into the sink.

"No, we're having this conversation because you obviously don't trust me! It doesn't matter what we were talking about, it doesn't matter who I was texting! I could be texting your mother and I shouldn't have to tell you what we were talking about! That's why we're having this conversation," you say as you turn back to face him from the other end.

He hates this. He hates fighting with you (which is a very, very rare occasion). He hates that you think he doesn't trust you. He hates his insecurity eating at him, telling him to keep questioning you on why you and Jay were talking in the first place. He was aware that you were close with his friends, but it wasn't until the texts he realized just how close you are with them. It's not that he didn't trust you, he just didn't know how to act when it came to you and other guys. God knows how he got lucky enough to meet you, let alone date you, so the thought of him losing you to someone else actually terrified him. Not only were you his first real relationship, but he wanted you to be his first and only one in life. You were it for him.

"Why did he text you." He deadpans from his side of the kitchen.

You scoff with a hint of exasperation. "You're kidding me."

You stare at him. He stares back, quirking an eyebrow, as if restating the same question back, as if testing you.

You're fuming now. Why was he making it so hard? Why was he doubting you? Out of frustration, you start laughing, which scares him. That can't be good.

"Fine. You wanna know so bad? Take a look,"  you're one tone level away from screaming as you take your phone out of your pocket, unlock it, and open up your conversation with "bluejay park", sliding the phone across the island to reach him.

Jake stares at the phone which now lies there, unlocked, facing him. Isn't this what he wanted? It is, right? That's why he started this dreaded argument with you in the first place.

Then why does he feel so fucking awful?

He looks back up at you, to see you sighing and looking up at the ceiling, as if trying to force your forming tears back into your eyes.

Yup, he feels horrible.

"Happy? Happy to know we were just trying to plan a surprise birthday party for you but you and your jealously just had to know huh, Jake?" You quickly state, voice cracking, as you tried not to choke up. You weren't sad that he found out about the surprise. You were sad that it felt like he didn't trust you. That he thought you were the type of person to do god knows what behind his back. You hated the feeling of not being trusted. Especially by Jake, of all people.

"Fuck."

Jake's face (and heart) falls with the most broken expression you've ever seen. But you're too sad, angry, tired (a mix of all?) to care. Your only goal right now is to not let him see you cry.

You hurry past him, across your apartment, and into your bedroom, slamming the door behind you, leaving behind a shocked, and regretful, Jake.

His heart shrinks when he hears the door slam shut and a little more when he looks down at the still unlocked phone in front of him. He didn't have the heart in him to look at it anymore. Of course he trusted you, he knew what you said was the truth.

He mentally screams at himself for assuming the worst––for thinking that you, a literal angel, would betray him.  First, he thought he was losing you to someone else. Now, he was afraid he just lost you through his own actions. 

He hesitantly sulks over to your door, softly knocking when he reaches it.

"Y/N?"

No response.

"Y/N, I'm so sorry. I didn't know, I let my—”

"Jake just please leave me alone for now," he hears you painfully say from a distance, meaning you're on your bed. He knows the door's unlocked—the lock on your door hasn't been working for a long time now, despite the many times he tells you to talk to your landlord about it. But he doesn't find it in him to open it. He knows he messed up. If he saw you in there right now, crying, he wouldn't know what to do. He wouldn't know what he would to do himself, knowing he was the reason behind your tears.

He nods in silence, knowing you can't see him, but does so anyways and returns to his spot on the couch. He could leave right now, go back to the dorm with the rest of the guys, let you have your space like you wanted. But his heart hurts at the idea of leaving you sad, angry, or a combination of both. He can't leave this unresolved. He fucked up, he has to fix it.

And so he sits on your couch for another hour. The clock on the wall behind him continues to tick as the silent tension in your apartment continues to grow. When it hits 11pm and he's sure you've slumbered off into sleep, he quietly enters your room.

He can see your figure in the dark, your back facing the door as you're curled up into yourself under the comforter. He feels his heart drop a little more when he imagines you crying in that position from earlier. He slowly peels the comforter open and gets into his side of the bed, careful not to bother your sleeping figure.

Laying there, staring up at the ceiling, he's never felt more like a stranger in your bed. It's not that he hasn't slept over before, god knows he's probably slept over at your place more than he has in his own bed. But right now, in this moment, he just felt awful. Like he didn't deserve to be in such close proximity to you. How could he be deserving? He violated your privacy, made you feel like you weren't trusted, doubted your relationship.

These thoughts run through Jake's head as he stares up at your ceiling fan, wishing he could turn back time to a few hours ago, before he checked your phone, before he let his insecurities get to the best of him.

You can feel the dip he makes in the bed behind you when he gets in. Of course you're not asleep. There's no way sleep could reach you when you had the recent events constantly replaying in your head like a broken record.

You knew Jake with all your heart. You didn't have to look at him to know he was probably laying there, hurt, staring up at the ceiling, drafting what to say once you wake up—or once he knows you're actually still awake.

You decide to break the tension by turning to lay on your other side, facing him.

You were wrong. Thanks to the little sliver of moonlight shining through your sheer curtains, you can see him, now laying on his side, already looking at you with so much regret in his eyes. You can almost hear the cracks in your heart physically forming.

His eyes widen when he realizes you're still awake. He opens his mouth to say something, but not before you quickly shift over to his side of the bed and embrace him in a tight hold, burying your face into his chest. Without any hesitation, he returns the gesture, arms holding your body as close to him as possible. As if once he let go, he'd lose you forever.

He lets out a sigh of relief as he breathes you in. He didn't even know he was holding his breath all this time.

"I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry Y/N," he mutters into your hair. He feels his hoodie getting wet from where you buried your face. He pulls you closer, if that's even possible, feeling his own eyes heating up with sadness. He would never forgive himself for making you feel this way.

"You know I trust you right? Please know that. I shouldn't have assumed the worst when I saw your phone. I...I let my insecurities get to the best of me."

You move your head from its home on his chest to look up at him, as if asking him to elaborate. This was new to you, you didn't know he held insecurities in your relationship. But it wasn't because of you, no, you were his entire world. Losing you meant losing everything.

Jake's never been the best at saying his feelings. That's why it took him so long (with the help of his six best friends) to finally confess how he felt about you. He was afraid of letting people in if they could easily walk out. Maybe that's why he never let anyone into his life before you. But oh, were you an exception. The second he met you, he knew he was fucked. But thank god he did, because thanks to you, he's been able to be more open, more vulnerable. He's able to talk to you about anything and everything. He doesn't have that same fear of losing people anymore, not when he has you in his life to reassure him every step of the way. But right now, in this moment, he doesn't know how to tell you that his new fear was, in fact, just losing you.

The sheer idea of you not being a part of his life anymore terrified him. 

"I hope you know you're never going to lose me Jake, if that's what you're insecure about," you softly mutter as you wrap your free arm that's not stuck in between both your bodies around him to gently play with the ends of his hair. It's as if you could read his mind, he loves that you know him so well.

"It just sucks that you could even think I would ever do something as awful as what you were assuming...with one of your closest friends nonetheless," you continue.

"I know. I know, and I feel terrible. I'm so sorry. I know you would never do anything remotely close to that, and I know you would never intentionally try to keep anything from me," he sighs. He shifts so he can lie down on his back, bringing you with him to lie on his chest, never letting you go once. "It's just...I just don't know what I'd do if I ever lost you Y/N. Everyday, I ask myself what heroic thing I must've done in my past life to deserve this life with you and I can't help but think you could just as easily be stripped away from me."

As much as your heart breaks listening to him rant, you feel your love for him grow even more. You knew how hard it was for him to put his true emotions into words, and him telling you this reminded you how much trust he had in you.

After some moments of silence, moments of him drawing random shapes onto your back, moments of you two just holding each other like it was the end of the world, you speak up.

"I love you. I'm sorry for making you doubt yourself—"

"No, it's not your fault, I can't help but think things like that. I just don't know what I did to deserve you, and I know that I need to be mo–"

"Babe let me finish," you say with a little giggle in your tone. He immediately stops and mutters a little "sorry". How cute, you tell yourself.

"I was gonna say," you look back up at him so you're making direct eye contact now. "You're the only one that's ever on my mind, Jake. I can't help the way you think, but I can assure you that there is no one else I would rather be with. And I mean that for the rest of life."

You snuggle back into the comfortable hoodie he's currently wearing (you make a mental note to yourself to steal it from him later) and decide to ease the tension,

"So you're stuck with me for life, sorry to inform you Mr. Sim."

Jake lets out a laugh, looking down at you to see you returning his smile with a cheeky one.

"I love you. So much," he says so sincerely, so genuinely, that you almost tear up again from how content you were. Now you were asking yourself, what did you do to deserve him?

Jake Sim is not a jealous person.

No, he just loves you.

A lot.

[loth-wolffe]

(not me making this awful cover but i wanted this to have one lmao. i do not own the picture i used, so credits to whomever made this lovely pic)

So first of all, I just wanted to say thank you so much for the 100 followers LIKE?????? where did thAT come from I just- you guys are sO AMAZING !!! I am beyond grateful for all of your support and your kindness and I'm so happy interact with you pretty people.

I really don't have any rules, nor characters I don't wanna write of that I can think of as in right now. (please if state if u want it to be nsfw bc my first instinct is write sfw stuff)

ANd, as a thank you, I made this super duper fantastic song lyric prompt list that you can choose from (you can absolutely send in a lyric that isn't in the list if you want) and just send me a sw character and we'll see how that goes!

SO HERE IT IS:

Song lyric prompt list

• already requested, but you can ask for them again!

1. I don't need anything fancy, I just need me and you slow dancing. - Slow dancing by Aly and AJ.

2. I've been trying hard not to talk to you/act a fool. - Sunflower vol. 6 by Harry Styles

3. Say it's been long six months, and you were too afraid to tell her what you want. - How you get the girl by Taylor Swift

4. And if you have a minute, why don't we go? Talk about it, somewhere only we know. - Somewhere only we know by Keane

5. To the strand, a picnic planned, for you and me. - From Eden by Hozier

6. Why she had to go? I don't know, she wouldn't say. - Yesterday by The Beatles

7. I think I'm falling, I'm falling for you. - Fallingforyou by the 1975

8. Take on me, take me on, I'll be gone, in a day or two. - Take on me by a-ha

9. Honey just put your sweet lips on my lips, we should just kiss like real people do. - Like real people do by Hozier

10. You wanna say no, no, it ain't gonna work, but then you fumble your words, oh you're running out of reasons. - Running out of reasons by The Wanted

11. You love me, but you don't know it yet. - Happy accidents by Saint Motel

12. I don't really care what they would say, I'm asking you to stay. - Level of concern by twenty one pilots

13. You know I talk too much, honey come put your lips on mine and shut me up. - Talk too much by COIN.

14. I know that you're scared because hearts get broken. - Golden by Harry Styles

15. I try and try to erase you, but you won't disappear - Everywhere by Niall Horan

16. I heard you ask about me through a friend, my adrenaline kicked in, because I've been asking 'bout you too - Nervous by Shawn Mendes

17. Every time I'm leavin' you, you don't make it easy. - Sunflower by Post Malone and Swae Lee.

18. I wish that I could believe, that there's a day you'll come back to me, but still have to say, I'd do it all again. - Just want you to know by Backstreet Boys

19. Well, tell me do you hate me or do you wanna date me? - Van Horn by Saint Motel

20. Can't help it if I wanna kiss you in the rain. - Hey Stephen by Taylor Swift

21. I know I would rather be together alone, in a big top circle and a world we can call our own. - All our own by Radio Company

22. Every time I find the words to end it, something in your eyes won't let it. - Shandi by KISS

23. Just dance in my living room, love with an attitude, drunk to an 80's groove - Only human by Jonas Brothers

24. I spend all my time, waiting all night for you. - No going back by Yuno

25. I need to know, if this is mutual, before I go. - Mutual by Shawn Mendes

26. I will sing to your every day, if it will take away your pain - Miss missing you by Fall out Boy

27. If I could fly, I'd be coming right back home to you. - If I could fly by One Direction

28. When you rise in the morning sun, I feel your touch in the pouring rain, and the moment that you wander far from me, I wanna feel you in my arms again. - How deep is your love by Bee Gees

29. If I wake, I'll move closer without waking you, sleeper, sleeper, what's been tiring you. - Rise by Helena Deland

30. All we do is think about the feelings that we hide, all we do is sit in silence waiting for a sign. - Drive by Halsey

31. I never sat by the shore, under the sun with my feet in the sand, but you brought me here. - Malibu by Miley Cyrus

32. With a sunset and a moonrise not so far behind, to give us enough light, to lay down underneath the stars. - Constellations by Jack Johnson

33. Dancing through our house with the ghost of you. - Ghost of you by 5sos

34. And we all sit around the fire, we feel a little warmer now. - Woods by Hollow Coves

35. Won't you kiss me once, baby? Just a kiss goodnight, maybe. - Put your head on my shoulder by Paul Anka

36. If I leave here tomorrow, would you still remember me?- Free Bird by Lynyrd Skynyrd

37. Baby just came back around, said she needs time to explore, said I can’t love her no more - Baby came home by The Neighborhood

38. When I kissed you I meant it. / I wanna be more than a friend. - Do it again by Pia Mia

39. I thought that I was dreaming when you said you loved me. - Ivy by Frank Ocean

40. If you're awake then I am too. If you're lost then I'll find you. If you're hurt then I'll fix you. - It's U by Cavetown

41. They don't know about the things we do, they don't know about the I love you's. - They don't know about us by One Direction

42. Can I kiss you or not? / Are you still mad at me? I'm hoping not. - Like to be you by Shawn Mendes and Julia Michaels

43. Kiss me once, then kiss me twice, then kiss me once again, it's been a long, long time. - It's been a long, long time by Harry James

44. Kiss me hard before you go. - Summertime sadness by Lana del Rey

45. You said you'd meet me out there tomorrow, but tomorrow never came. - Tomorrow never came by Lana del Rey ft. Sean Ono Lennon

46. How can I miss you so much when you're right here? - Miss you so much by Miley Cyrus

47. The way she tells me I'm hers and she's mine. - Cherry wine by Hozier

48. No need to say goodbye, you'll come back, when it's over. - The Call by Regina Spektor.

49. Common sense tells me kiss the girl goodbye / I think I love you - Common sense by Joshua Bassett

50. If I could tell her how she's everything to me, but we are a million worlds apart and I don't know how I would even start - If I could tell her by Ben Platt ft Laura Dreyfruss

51. I'm giving you a night call to tell you how I feel - Nightcall by Kavinsky

52. We went for a drive, at 2:30 in the morning. I kissed you, it was pouring. - Remember that night? by Sara Kays

53. Don't wanna hand you all my trouble, don't wanna give you all my demons, you'll have to watch me struggle from several rooms away, but tonight I'll need you to stay - The run and go by twenty one pilots

[gg-astrology]

Hey,love ! Idk if my ask got eaten up or not but I've been really curious about my Saturn placement cause I've really been struggling with it and it has gotten worse these past few years. I have retrograde Saturn in the first house in Gemini. I really want to know how to work with it. All the love 💕💕💕

Hey there!! 💞💞💞 Ahaskjknf i’m sorry i don’t even know if some asks are eaten up but :(( I got this one! 💞 Ooof I hope I can help? 💞

[ Gemini Saturn + Gemini Saturn rx in 1H ]

Nice I guess I’m doing this skjdnk as a continuation of the earlier saturn post

Saturn as the lord or time, of manifestation, in a light sign like Gemini the native may often listen to others and subsequently feel restrained by word, action or inaction (the limitation part) 

Imagine a libra but like,,, as a gemini. Sometimes listening to others can be like ‘oh ok’ and then a minute later it can lead to someone being like ‘wait now that i think about it…’ it can lead to indecision on the person, over-thinking situations and thoughts to themselves into growing anxiety if they don’t learn how to take control of that and express themselves properly, healthily and openly to others to stop themselves from over-thinking/assuming stuff immediately

another thing to note is that because emotionality goes fast like POOF, once you’re reassured about something you act like you weren’t emotionally worried about it in the first place. It’s a good idea to mention it to others, or express your vulnerabilities/emotionality too because you may try to handle things short-term and think long-term engagement/planning is unnecessary. It is, like it’s necessary. Make sure to give yourself room/space to prep others that it causes you anxiety, so that if you ever doubt yourself/your relationship like that again you’ll have room to mention it as well. 

Self-expression when it comes to the self/others is something that they prefer to be learnt. As in through practice, a lot of the time Gemini as a mutable/air sign may feel uneasy when they’re put on the spot to do something they might not be good at. There’s a tendency to be self-aware/feel shameful in themselves if they don’t perform the way that’s acceptable/know they’ll do well in/can give it a go with more than 50% chance of succeeding.

I think in a way you’re aware of how other responds to you, but also hyper-conscious about how you appear to others. The idea is you can sometimes over-think to yourself, worry so hard you wear yourself out with your mental activity. And that’s never a good thing to do because the lesson here for Gemini (communicative) and Saturn (challenges) is to learn how to speak when you need it the most.

Speaking to others to quell up worries, speaking about your emotions/how others makes you feel is kinda important. 

You’re right, somethings aren’t as serious as it turns out to be but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t mention how it’s affected/hurt/impacted you prior. You might not want to burden/open up about your vulnerabilities, but it gives others a chance to look out and take care for you. To look after and be thoughtful towards you, which is something your Saturn in 1st is going to prefer. 

Cut the problem at the bud, is what I’m trying to get at. Expressing your emotions/vulnerabilities is the way you can learn how to grow/accept changes best. At the same time, keep in mind that with how receptive Gemini is to response and activity around them– you do tend to think a little pessimistically about situation bc it ties in to practical ‘doing’ things to remedy it (if something turns out bad then you’ll have a solution ready)

Don’t let yourself think negatively all the time, communicate it out. And also sometimes, if you feel like you’re being tossed and turned with self-transformation. Try to learn how to express and feel confident in your own value and thinking. Gemini are adaptable, sometimes in Saturn you can be stubbornly opinionated even if it’s uncalled for or unwanted. 

You hurt yourself most when you don’t learn how to be vulnerable or make Gemini ‘stiffen up’ when it’s supposedly flexible. Learn to be flexible with your thinking as well, not everything is pessimistic or optimistic, but you can express your feelings/thoughts/expression out loud and see where it leads you (where you need to go) 💞 

A lil more on Gemini Saturn natives (not necessarily in 1st house) 

Practicality/pragmatism is an approach they prefer. Because that cuts down on your worries right? But in doing so they can sometimes overthink their inaction/action into a spiralling myriad of self-worries/judgement and prone to not realizing how to deal with things emotionally (to the point where they measure how much they’re over-thinking with the response people give them in return or suppress their emotional component bc it was ‘whisked’ away by the response/ignore the ). 

Overthinking because they feel a need to make the ‘right’ decision or seek security is common.

Insomnia, isolation– feeling lonely or ‘emotions’ is sometimes rejected. Activity is preferred to keep the self occupied, thus, sometimes native of the Saturn Gemini can turn to seek friends, communication, people. Because they never want to be left out/alone or lonely or feeling like they’re on the wrong/off path in life. 

It’s more to do with feeling of being ‘unattached’ and uncared for rather than like what’s actually happening?? Sometimes the mind can overthink things which makes the emotionality/insecurities of the person more reactive. Being reciprocated or reached out to is also important, to feel like ‘oh there is a thread’ and quell some of that insecurity to dust (like the wind blew it away suddenly)

Self-expression can be a thing they enjoy alone, like writing and stuff. But mostly it still has to do with energy, keeping the self from feeling out of the loop/isolated and ‘checking in’ sometimes that people are listening to them. 

Sometimes– depending on the person, sharing an intimate side of their art/passion/self-expression requires them to shut their emotionality down and be in the right state of mind for it. 

Gemini does well with practicality, so these Saturn Gemini people tend to be practiced people. Yet they may sometimes lack in emotionality, or rather they would absolutely hate to look dumb in front of others/public. Saturn is serious, in a light sign in Gemini everything have to have substance even if it’s casual/informal. 

Saturn Gemini tends to get a little more stagnant, as in they fear being made a fool of so much they might not even attempt to do something until they’re ‘sure’ they’re going to do it well/good. Practice (since Saturn points to learning something and being able to show it out. What the Gemini Saturn needs to realize is that they tend to feel a heavy presence of ‘shame’ and panic when they feel like certain things are out of control (Saturn) and that they are being made a fool of (Gemini) in public

Your self-doubt becomes your self-preservation and thus self-limitations. Most of your worries stems from your own over imaginative thinking and consequently affect your health/emotionality as well. 

Don’t assume, just do things. It helps you grow a lot better if you learn how to actually reach out and connect to others, instead of just thinking about it. 

Also learn how to be on equal footing as others, as in– trust in your own ideas/opinions and good points. Don’t let your pessimism/insecurities shade over your vision and make you feel like you’re not as great as you are because you really are amazing person

Sometimes Gemini Saturn can have really strong spells of pessimism and isolation habit, as in they don’t listen to anyone else’s compliments on them and focus on the criticism/negatives. Be sure to learn how to ‘feel’ happy with compliments, not just looking at it critically all the time. You can be guarded or wary of delusions, but what you don’t realize is that you’re often self-delusioning yourself into being more negative and it’s not helping anyone around you help you. Learn how to seek help and also trust in other’s opinions/response. As well as your own, you only want to hear what you want to hear and that can sometimes lead to self-fulfilling prophecy when all you hear from your own head is fear.

Trust in positivity, and leave room to grow and learn. You need to be able to connect to your emotional side as well, and not let it get dictated by your thinking. If you can feel emotions healthily (balance/stabilize it out) your thinking will come along better as well. Try thinking about that 💞

Ok thats it! 💞💞 I hope this is helpful skdnfkjsn 💞💞💞