#we've been married for years

[nonerrata-myarchives]

Why is Grayson HAWthorne haunting me this morning.

Tell me this isn't him. (I'll fight you.)

But seriously who is this diva? And why do I want to get on my knees fh? 💞😜🥰🤓😉😉😉😫😫

[fakemichaelsheen]

-the bookshop-

crowley, enters: hey-

aziraphale, staring out of the window discreetly, waves his arms in a shushing gesture: shh, nina and maggie are on a date!

crowley, whispers: what? *joins aziraphale at the window; smirks* wow, we're good

aziraphale, proud: yes, we are rather *watches nina and maggie hold hands; thoughtful* I've never been on a date before

crowley: ...

crowley, frowns: yes you have

aziraphale, stares at him: what? no I haven't!

crowley, gestures: what are you talking about? we've been on loads of dates! we went to the ritz last night!

aziraphale, realises: oh, no, crowley, I meant a romantic date. with dinner, dancing...

crowley, offended: 1941!

aziraphale, blinks: you could have shot me in the face that night. you think that's romantic?

crowley, folds his arms: yeah and you did too so you can get off your high horse *mutters mockingly* 'a romantic date'

aziraphale: ...

[ineffectualdemon]

What I love most about "white lotus" Binghe is it's made pretty clear that he's just as intense and obsessive and weird and sneaky as post abyss Binghe the only real difference is that he shows Shen Qingqiu that side of him

He just takes off the mask and shows his whole hand

I get the feeling that everyone else at Cang Qiong Mountain thought pre abyss Binghe was a nice upstanding disciple who nevertheless was extremely unnerving at times and was WAY too obviously in love with his Shizun

Except on Qing Jing Peak where they found him extremely unnerving and upsettingly obsessive about their Shizun

(I get you Binghe. I really do. We're brothers in mental illness here)

Meanwhile Shen Qingqiu is just like "I'm doing so good at a normal balanced Shizun/disciple relationship. We're so normal" like he knows Binghe is clingy but seems to think it's still in the realms of perfectly average

And not, you know, attachment disorder

Anyway yes. I love that while Binghe does change with time the attachment and obsession and him always being behind Shen Qingqiu is rooted in pre abyss

[kalpalatas]

what i love about how kagi loves hirano is that he thinks the sun shines out of his ass but also that he's the weirdest most impossible man alive

[arrgh-whatever]

YOUR HUSBAND??? LAST TIME I CHECKED YOU GUYS WERE STILL DATING CONGRATS!!!!

we're not yet married unfortunately! it's just weird to call him boyfriend since the only thing that's keeping us from marriage is a few formalities

but hopefully in a week we'll be able to finally start working on getting the required documents!

[dawnarrii]

IM IN LOVE WITH HER. IM IN LOVE WITH IREAHJI LACELEAF.

I AM IN LOVE WITH A FEM ASSHOLE-

[aquarines]

happy national boyfriends day to my actual wife samuel thyne reid

[aurawra21]

Are 30 yr old Jeckole married?

and what is their stance on adopting children

they ARE married and the way i imagined them marrying was out of the blue, no wedding or anything, just the two of them going to the courthouse on a random day

and they don't want kids. period. sorry, i can't ever see them with kids and they dont want them either in general i think. if they were to be around children, it wouldnt be their own, but their friends' kids or something. but that's the most that happens. they're just the aunts.

[unlimitedhappinessforever]

I am very in love with my wife. It has not gotten any less fun going on 7 years since we got together. Just a sleepover with my best friend every night. God was being extremely epic when he made marriage.

[stormyoceans]

I NEED THEM TO KISS SO BADLY IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY

[bumblingbabooshka]

Thinking about Vulcans prizing “calm” over “happiness”. 

Like how humans look back on their childhood and remember how happy it was - joyful days spent running around in the sun, getting into a bit of trouble, laughing with peers and family - that’s how they know it was a good one. Meanwhile Vulcans might look back on their childhood and remember how peaceful it was. Quiet days spent studying, the warm glow of candlelit lessons in caves, getting along smoothly with ones peers - that’s how they know it was a good one. Humans typically chose their friends and romantic partners based on if this person makes them feel happy above all. The question of “Do you like being with them?” is interpreted to mean “Does being with them make you feel happy?” But since Vulcans don’t experience (or strive for) happiness there would have to be some other parameter. So I was thinking about like, what is a good relationship to a Vulcan? There’s obviously a big emphasis on ‘togetherness’ in Vulcan unions. The Pon Farr ritual Tuvok does with his [hologram] wife involves them committing to becoming “Two bodies one mind” and it’s stated that they give and receive from each other all that they are. There’s also of course the iconic “Never and always touching and touched”. This is all (as was said during T’Pol & Koss’ wedding) “The Vulcan heart, the Vulcan soul, this is our way.” Vulcans are also (ENT) expected to live together for at least a year after being married - I imagine so that they can bond with and get to know one another. In SNW T’Pring wants for Spock to honor the commitments he makes to her so in that case T’Pring values Spock keeping his word to her and placing her above other things. I see a bit of Tuvok in that, where he prizes his commitment to T’Pel over anything else to the point where he’d nearly rather die than break it: (Even though he eventually agrees to having sex with a hologram it MUST be of his wife and he lets Tom/The Audience know that he will NOT be making a habit of it. There’s no ironclad logical reason for him to react this way as a hologram is not a person but his commitment to T’Pel seems to take precedence and I believe that’s his reasoning. His bond with T’Pel is logical, sustaining and important to him and he’s loath to break it over some bodily need. some desire that will pass even if it kills him.) <- By this way of thinking, betraying T’Pel would be the emotional choice while remaining loyal to her is remaining loyal to his logical self. A strong emphasis on loyalty to one’s mate seems to be a common Vulcan trait. In the beginning this seems to be rooted in tradition but later on its probably assumed that the couple will be loyal to one another out of some sort of actual connection between two people as opposed to pure obligation. In ENT T’Pol says that a certain degree of “affection” is eventually expected to happen within a marriage (though the way she says it makes me think this doesn’t always occur and isn’t necessarily The Goal) and her mother says that she and her husband developed a “deep connection” to one another. All this makes me think that a connection and a sense of ‘togetherness’ or ‘compatibility’ would also be prized over more emotional things like a passion for one another. It’s a partnership above all and that would be prized over a romantic union.  It makes me think of Vulcans’ roots in violence and war. Maybe this commitment to a steady togetherness, two people who don’t know each other being able to work together so seamlessly they nearly become one, is a way to show they’ve moved beyond that despite the pon farr remaining. Vulcans are a naturally very emotional species. Someone who incites that would probably not be seen as someone you should spend your time with. Someone who makes your heart pound, sets you ablaze, fills you with passion - that sounds like a bad Vulcan time v_v  Tuvok says as much when he talks about how he was struck with “shon-ha’lock”. Humans wouldn’t see anything wrong with having a crush on someone (and indeed in that episode Tom only comes to the conclusion that it’s a shame Tuvok couldn’t act on these emotions) but it’s obvious that even a teenaged crush when uncontrolled can become a very big problem to a Vulcan. In one of the Star Trek Novels Tuvok even stops being friends with and talking to a girl because she tearfully admits she has feelings for him and he sees that her feelings for him cause her pain.  Instead of thinking “Oh, she really likes me, good! We’re close friends so maybe we can make this work.” or even “I don’t like her romantically but since we’re close friends we can work through it.”  Tuvok thinks “Oh, she really likes me. That must be causing her to become very emotional and I can see she’s clearly upset. I’ll remove myself from her life so my presence doesn’t incite those emotions anymore.” And while him flat out just cutting himself out of her life might seem weird and kind of cruel and a frankly hilarious reaction to someone confessing their love to you - I also think it’s something he thought of as a kindness. If his presence harms her (stirs up emotions in her) then he will remove himself to keep from harming her. Along that vein, calmness or the absence of strong emotions would be a good relationship and one worth staying in. Not that there can’t be any emotions (Tuvok and T’Les obviously care[d] deeply for their respective spouses) but that they must be controllable and able to be cast aside in the face of logic.  I also think that “knowing” the other person would be considered very important (after marriage of course). If you’re to operate as a partnership, a team, and especially if you’re both telepaths you should be able to know your spouse pretty damn well. I see T’Pring attempt to do this in SNW where she is constantly fighting to get to know Spock which Spock self-consciously discourages since he’s been told/shown that his human side is unappealing to Vulcans.  But yeah man idk...just picturing a Vulcan and a human talking for hours...walking along the beach...sleeping side by side...getting to know one another...and at the end of it all one says “You make me feel happy” and the other says “Your presence calms me” and it means, essentially, the same thing.

[thisintermezzo]

Apropos of nothing, I think it's fascinating that right before I got married, everyone (married and unmarried) tried to caution me to be prepared for the "sacrifices of marriage", this inherent thing I would "have to" cope with.

I asked what the sacrifices were. Not a single person had an answer for me. I'm serious.

They devolved into this whole "uhhh um well, you know, the sacrifices". What are they? I would like to be prepared for them, I said.

No actual answer. It was wild.

[miyuskye]

when card declines at therapy and they force me to read ch 209 of kuroshitsuji all over again

[zirconpetals]

Also I want a compilation of the gag when someone embarrasses Sam about their relationship and Max goes "Oh, Sam! I didn't know you felt this way ^v^" or something like that

It's cute to me for some reason

[ultimafranfan]

sigh i miss her

[pretxel]

He is.