#we're not going to talk about how late but its done and thats all that matters.
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
I was really brave and finally got my emissions done ;-;
#we're not going to talk about how late but its done and thats all that matters.#ptxt#Technically I need to study for the exam tomorrow morning but I'm... tired.#I feel much more prepared after going on this huge cool tangent about processing gold tellurides too. I found this neat paper talking about#the history and how Te is different from regular gold minerals and actually inhibits leaching. so we burn off the telluride o#*TeO2 and then leach the gold. Its super duper neat.#And bro asked me questions about Lithium processing and a friend asked me a question about a rock and it was a great day tbh :)#This exam promises to be rough though. I dont believe the teacher that it is easy. She overestimates our chemistry knowledge
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
are we really back to "oh you support (blank)? name ten people who (do/are) that right now or else youre lying for allyship points and everything you have to say should be disregarded". i thought we left that back in like. 2012 misogynist nerdbro culture
#i have seen it on two entirely separate topics lately and its like. hello?????#'if you cant name 10 trans authors off the top of your head you shouldnt be talking about trans issues full stop.#i dont think thats an unreasonable expectation for anyone wanting to engage in rational discourse' how about we all go outside#because like yeah i couldnt name you too many trans authors but given my transgenderismness i think i do in#fact still deserve a seat at the table. and i dont think there should be a prerequisite academic education level to be allowed to talk.#'but you could find them for free-' yes‚ you can‚ but people should still be allowed to a) choose what they read based#off of what interests them and not mildly-to-extremely dense nonfiction writing and still Talk About Their Own Lives And Have#Opinions#shockingly not reading a lot of one specific type of author doesnt prevent a person from having reasonable and valuable opinions#if youre not capable of parsing someones argument because theyre not well-read enough then that just imo means you dont actually understand#the things youve read to be able to give them a synopsis#this isnt school. we're not being graded. there is no required reading and you are perfectly capable of giving people an#explanation on your stances if theyre unfamiliar with them#i had a b) but i dont remember what it was‚ i think it probably was part of what i covered there that i thought was a separate thought#but yeah just like. idk you can just say 'hey i would really recommend reading xyz but to summarize‚ (thing that disproves them)'#it is not . difficult to either Explain yourself or‚ if that is not possible‚ Not be condescending to the person youre not willing to teach#for not knowing#ill stop there bc ive already done that ramble before but. yes#origibberish#edit: ok upon reread i got turned around and switched from addressing the less educated one conveying their arguments#to the more well read one#bc that was the b is i was gonna talk about both#yall get what i mean though just like. split it in half and flip it turnways
5 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hanahaki w/ Hoodie plz >.<
Hoodie x reader w/ hanahaki
Now we're getting to oooooooold requests RAAAAAAAH I'm so sorry for letting these sit :( they got buried </3
Notes: reader is gn, short post, no happy ending :(, reader is written as a normal person who doesnt go out killing and stuff
CWs: blood and death
hes... not around as often as either of you like. hes got a lot of obligations to tend to you know...? sometimes he can be gone for a few weeks at a time. and yet, you still managed to fall in love with him during the few times you guys actually get to sit down together and bond
his absence only makes it easier for you to hide your sickness- and to hide your feelings for him.... to top it off hes so hard to read, for all you know he could just be tolerating you as his talking buddy... hardly a friend...
but make no mistake, hes not oblivious... and even if it takes him a while to find the bloodied petals in your trash and connect the dots, he almost instantly notices how you seem more tired and worn down than usual. and hes going to make sure you rest until youre better
...but... you dont get better... he comes to see you more often when he can, even if its just for a few minutes- but that doesnt seem to be doing anything for you. if anything his increased visits only seem to be making you worse
hes stubborn in making you rest. hes never really tolerated you going on about your life when youre not at your best. if you have so much as a cough hes going to make you take care of yourself. and that still remains true here- albeit more intensely as your condition rapidly declines
when hes away doing his job he picks up things he thinks you will like- rocks, random trinkets from hikers, things like that to try to brighten your day
by the time he sees you choking and coughing an entire fistful of flowers does he finally realize whats happening to you- may not even connect that you have feelings for *him*- he doesnt let the idea that you want someone else hurt him
but... its too late. the plants have already done far too much damage to you that by the time he drops you off at the hospital- he cant even come in with you and god thats going to eat him alive for the rest of his life- you cant be saved
he... feels it cruel to leave flowers at your grave. instead he leaves beautiful rocks and notes..
#creepypasta x reader#creepypasta x you#crp x reader#crp x you#hoodie x reader#hoodie x you#canon x reader#canon x you#x reader
24 notes
·
View notes
Text
hi... rhis might sound really random?? but ill be going on an indefinite hiatus. nothing bad is going on except studying and lack of inspo... just lost my love for writing, thats all.
(if u wanna know more which i doubt u can look in the read more... its really long + a bit at the beginning for moots so you dont have to scroll down) (this is unbelievably long)
to all of my moots, even those who i dont engage with as much, this might sound a little weird/creepy but i do check your blogs when i have the time. even if its just checking if youve updated and im just like "ooo so and so was here earlier" or "[insert moots/other blogs] are interacting! how fun" call it nosy but im just really interested in seeing you guys active lol
i may not directly say so, but i get worried when there isnt an update for a while... like i get worried when youre not here and i wish you the best, and im happy when you reappear again. sometimes i only have the time to skim through my following and like the most recent post, but i want to show that i see you all <3 its kind of embarrassing how upset i get when i see everyone is awake when im asleep and it feels a little late to compliment a new theme change when i didnt notice it earlier
i try to go into askboxes when i can (scary because i want to interact but idk what to say) and i guess some times ive been ignored...? thats okay! like i get it but i kinda dont... we're not just moots for the fb because followers arent that important to me. even for moots that dont mainly write for a fandom im in i do try to check for one that i can read and understand! (even trying to get into hq now bc a lot of my newer ones are into it judging by what i see on the dash) now that i think about it i really couldve just gone to the masterlists so thats my fault..
im not saying i expect frequent interactions because im more than happy just being moots in the first place, but im trying to say that new and old moots, i do love you guys and i want the best for you. it doesnt matter how close we are or if theres barely any interactions, i dont want you to feel stress or pressure and you should live good lives! 💗 im happy that we managed to meet on this huge platform! 🫶🫶🫶
(i really hope this didnt come off wrong because i dont dislike any of you at all! i think it sounds like im complaining but i just want friends and its personally difficult for me both just me as a person and because of timezones 😭)
ANYWAYS THE MAIN PART
i dont mean to blame any of you, but its kind of pressuring asking for a part two. like, it is flattering trust me, because it means you enjoy the work and want more. for some its probably obvious what fic im talking about but when theres already 50+ comments asking for a part two, and you add more onto that, it feels more like an obligation to do so. im sure i can see that theres many comments asking when the next part is, so dogpiling on top of it is just not a great feeling as a writer.
i think some people forget that writers write in their free time. its not a job and theres not really much satisfaction you can get out of it except knowing that theres people who love what you write. there are moments where i write a lot, and like right now, im not writing at all. i cant force myself to no matter how much i know i need to write, because then the result is unsatisfactory. this happens every time i try to do an event and i feel SO bad because youre probably so excited to receive work born from your own idea and im just not doing it??
i want you guys to enjoy what i write, but i only want to put out the best quality. on multiple occasions, even with no pressure, i feel like ive completely messed up something ive written because of my own standards. the more followers you accumulate, the better the writing should be, right? or thats what im thinking for myself... if i get embarrassed when i see somebodys liked it, then clearly i havent done well enough to consider it to be good. ive deleted many of my works if you havent noticed. the wbk ones are still up i think but i just dont think theyre good enough to be on my mlist.
ive never really mentioned engagement before... and i know im guity of it as well, but i do make an effort to. im not saying you have to reblog everything you read, but even just the occasional one that you really love, which is what i do. i havent gotten around to making a reblog sideblog just yet because i dont have the time, but just know that if i did, every fic that i like would have a reblog as well. followers and likes arent as important to me as reading or acknowledging that people want to share my work.
i dont feel as proud of my more liked fics compared to this one for example (even tho its one of my most popular bllk works but u get the point). it makes me sm happier just seeing a little comment or tag in the reblogs. its funny, and i actually did smile every time, because i really wasnt expecting people to like it that much or even get comments at all
please dont feel bad if you havent been engaging like this! im not ungrateful. we've all been there, and youre already doing good showing some form of appreciation by liking it. im glad that my hard work and improvement over six months has led me to this point.
and another thing, telling me to off myself really isnt as motivating as you think, even as a joke.
15 notes
·
View notes
Text
OK SO IM LATE BUT. MORE SUB3 NEWS!!!
so a few days ago, krafton (their publisher), apparently had this like presentation of their plans over the next like 2 years. and during that they talked a bit about sub 3!
and this obviously creates a LOT of questions. not to worry, though, because unknown worlds added on to this:
im honestly not surprised by this. iirc, when below zero released they said it would be a WHILE before the next game, and they only announced this back in like... january? now, the first game's release was in january, and bz was in may, so it's definitely possible early access with be in spring of 2025. those games did not have multiplayer aspections tho! its possible we'll wait until mid 2025, and full release will likely not be until 2026. but who knows? the first game took like ten to be fully finished!!
and honestly. THANK GOD. i can't imagine any subnautica game having BATTLE PASSES or LOOT BOXES. i would have just straight up ignored this game 😭
i do wonder what these updates will entail! "many years to come" is definitely something interesting to me, because other than bug fixes... i dont remember sub or bz getting many updates post full release. is this referring to bug fixes, or is it implying that it will be in a state of early access for much longer? are they going to just keep adding new things (like the building update for sub1) and taking fandom suggestions? very interested!!
maybe this is an unpopular opinion, but i actually,,,, dont want multiplayer. now i do like bz, and these games arent really intended to be horror games, but also bz is very noticeablely less scary than sub1. and some of it i think definitely has to do with all the extra characters and dialogue. its hard to feel isolated when you know al-an and marg are nearby. so im very happy that it's optional, bc i know i will probably enjoy single player a lot more enjoyable!!
so now... SPECULATION.
so the first thing im curious about that the development team didnt mention:
"uncover the mysteries on an entirely new alien planet"
apprently we are NOT returning to 4546b. which im kind of sad about!! ik the story is very obviously done there, but it feels weird that its going to be some other planet this time around. THERE WONT BE PEEPERS!!!! (well there could be but it would be weird if some other random planet had the exact same lifeforms)
now my next immediate thought is: is this a direct continuation of below zero? my opinion is: no. probably not.
mostly because it mentions up to four players, and robin and alan are, if you look very closely, only two people. now they COULD just create two new characters to go alongside them (my fanfic brain loves the au idea of marg and ryley 🥺) but im just going to assume that with the addition of a new planet, we're going to drop the old storylines. which means no more degasi, sunbeam, aurora, or ayou sisters. we might move away from architects/precursors altogether! (my basis on this is absolutely nothing and i could be wrong, this is 100% just theorizing)
also, i imagine that it would be difficult to keep the plot the exact same with two established characters and then two new ones, depending on how this multiplayer aspect works. if its another crash, it would be a lot easier to just have the extra players die/survive, then try to work in a balancing act of one guy playing al-an.
(also i like keeping the ending of bz vauge. if they show up again, they would have to mention what happened to the rest of the architects, and i think it's much more fun if thats a mystery!)
((also also, im gonna drop a bomb on u all for a second. i actually,,, dont like al-an. i have a deeper connection to probably every single other character in bz. i think they really fumbled al's character and story and he is so incredibly bland to me. it feels like they go nowhere with how he was responsible for the kharra outbreak because the game ends immediately after he confesses! it would be nice to give him another chance, sure, but i personally dread the idea of even more al-an. sorry everyone for this horrible news))
HERE'S A CONCEPT IMAGE
i hope they bring back some cut content creatures for this!! i noticed this new area looks VERY similar to the safe shallows, and several of the fish seem to be variations of ones we've already seen (im already seeing bladderfish and hoopfish color pallettes, and the shark resmbles some early concept art for the shadow leviathan, but with the ice worm's colors...)
will there be more land areas?? is it going to entirely underwater?? more kharra?? NO DISEASE AT ALL?? AAAAAA!!!!
68 notes
·
View notes
Text
welcome, fellow monster lovers + fuckers~! to the smash or pass blog!
SUBMISSIONS: CLOSED
First things first - this is a queer friendly blog, so no r.adfem b.s. of any kind. don't be assholes, don't be bigots. be a clown (derogatory) and get blocked.
Second, no shit-talking people's monster(s) of choice. We're here for fun, not for negativity. (So no calling basic, shaming choices, saying "oh this non-human isn't enough of a monster", insulting how they look, calling them vanilla, etc etc.)
Also you're 100% allowed to add propaganda to the posts about why ppl should vote smash. (Not for pass though. Bc that's under the no negativity rule.)
Please see "How to Submit a Poll Option" for rules on submitting.
→ UNDER THE CUT ←
➥ About the Blog
➥ How to Submit a Poll Option
➥ Meet the Mods
→ ABOUT THE BLOG ←
New poll every day
Poll length 1 week
Replies on posts are only open to those who have been following this blog for at least a week.
This is a sideblog. It can not send asks.
We also can not receive or send DMs due to being a group blog.
The ask box is closed when submissions are closed because this is the piss on the poor website. (Aka reading comprehension doesn't exist)
Please note that if your preferred monster loses the poll, that's okay! They're still a winner in your heart. This is literally all just for the lulz. Genuinely, don't worry about it.
----------------
→ HOW TO SUBMIT A POLL OPTION ←
Please use the ask box!
PLEASE NOTE THE FOLLOWING!
→ ONLY ONE CHARACTER PER ASK. PLEASE. We're begging ya :V submissions that list multiple characters will be deleted.
→ if the character / monster is a minor, that's a no-go. Don't be a fuckin creep. Keep kids out of this.
(If one slips pass us, please POLITELY inform us by replying to the post. We do our best to check ages, but we're only human. No one is perfect.)
→ we will not post monster options such as W*nd*g*s, Sk*nw*lk*ers, and the like, as its a) from closed culture, and b) not the place.
Native peoples have asked many a time for ppl to stop fuckin w their folklore and stories, so give em respect. It's the least that can be done, goddamn. Any bullshit sent about this will be deleted and blocked.
ANYHOO
If you're able to, add a pic of the monster in question! If it's someone's art, please make sure they're okay with it being used first, and provide credit too. We're not reposting willy-nilly around here. We do need artist credit whenever possible! (if the images submitted are official, pls just make a note of it!)
[Poll Submission] Monster name, What theyre from* [Poll Submission] Wulver, scottish folklore [Poll Submission] Abe Sapien, Hellboy (movies or comics) (image from Hellboy comics)
* this is more if its applicable - ie; from specific mythology, or from a media source. If the media is 18+ please make a note of it!
If you submit off-anon, we respond privately with if its queued or if it was already a poll.
If you submit on anon, the ask is deleted once its queued. (Or if you submit something that we've already done.)
---------------------
→ Meet the Mods ←
We're a couple of chaotic idiots who know each other irl and get up to shenanigans. Like this blog.
Mod Curse 🌸
✿ Mid 20s - she/they - Big Gay
✿ Evil women? Sign me tf up!
✿ Uhh I'm a weird cat mom, artist and general nerd, bonus adhd
Mod Ghoul ☢️
➤ late 20s, it/its he/his
➤ Horrible taste in fictional men lol
➤ I also mod SelfshipConfessional !
➤ Three allegations I can never escape - 'oh thats the local cryptid', 'its a creature, your honor', and 'I'm pretty sure you're just a corpse but okay.'
--------------
Here, a prize for reading this entire thing! Pics of the mod's pets!
Ghoul's dog - Ollie - 108 lbs of attitude and crime condensed into an 8 lbs of dog.
Curse's cat - Maple - she likes to slap the shit outta Ghoul (with claws!) when it's visting Curse. (Ghoul catsits.) Pretty sure Maple is 95% floof.
#poll blog#monster fucker#monster lover#monster x human#exophilia#monster smash or pass#smash or pass poll blog#tumblr polls#not a poll
62 notes
·
View notes
Text
Nightwatch and Nightmares
Summary: war has to take the first half of the night watch on the maker tree,and finds himself with a human companion that leaves him wondering about just how far away in nature nephilim were from humans.
Cw: nightmares, unnamed human female character. (I dont really write x reader)
A/n: this was a gift for @moodymisty, also I have to clarify that I use dashes for dialogue!(my mother tongue is spanish, we use dashes for dialogue,thats just my writing style!). Misty I hope you like it!
He knew strife was going to get him tangled up in something,its strife we're talking about.
Which is how he finds himself keeping watch over the maker tree where all the humans were. He sits the at the edge of the entrance with his sword driven into the bark of the oversized Flora, the night Sky above twinkles with stars as its clear of any clouds.
He doesnt like this- being still and having to wait.
War has done it time and time again for missions,but this? This was different. He could do it- he would do it but he hated it.
Its the middle of the night, he hopes to at least crush a demon head. Instead,what he gets makes itself know with soft steps.
Walking behind him is a human girl,young, she holds on to her clothes as the air is a little chilly. Her eyes seem lost and she seems shaken.
The human sits close to the rider,perhaps because he meant safety and she needed some of that.
War- he didnt understand humans. He understands why he protects them Yes,but the intricacies of the human condition absolutely baffle Him.
--Tis late-- he says under his breath to not startle the girl-- what are you doing awake,human?
His companion pulls her knees to her chest, resting her hands on her lap.-- nightmare.
Light from the moon filters through the massive leaves of the tree,its a mesmerizing sight to behold. Theres Beauty in this destroyed world, a glimmer of hope for the humans.
After a moment of contemplation,war asks-- perhaps you'd like a listening ear? --She shook her head and a harsh wind blows, she shivers and her body shakes-- come closer, lest you freeze to death.
Reluctantly,the girl shuffles closer,enough that his radiating body heat subsides the effects of tbe chilly air on her skin.
--Theyre very vivid-My nightmares I mean-- she murmurs-- I dont want to talk about what it was about- I just want to go back to sleep but I cant shake off that lingering fear- do you guys even get nightmares?
Usually,he'd avoid being seen as weak or vulnerable. But the human was really shaken up and he didnt know what to say-- sometimes, yes.
--I didnt know that- WOW. We're similar in more ways than I thought-- she says absentmindedly, rubbing her palm with her thumb.
Well,that takes him off guard-- similar? Nephilim and human?
The girl shrugged-- well- you can develop bonds with people, your siblings I mean and the makers, too! Thats something important for us humans--she explains-- you can feel things like a sense of duty, or Curiosity. You can create things! Ive seen strife grab pieces of the maker tree and turn them into rustic toys for the kids! We also make stuff!
--Seems you have a point, little one-- he agrees, hes never seen it from that perspective. Now its glaringly obvious to him- how didnt he see it earlier?.
--You guys have a sense of humor too! I mean strifes the best example but ive seen you and fury laugh a little. You guys have troubles and worries like we do- i mean I could Keep going
Without noticing, the human had leaned on the rider for more warmth. Not that War minded,he didnt even feel her weight.
--As interesting as your ideas are human- I rather you save your strength--he states-- perhaps soon sleep Will find you-- then he makes a pause,trying to think the best words-- youre free to stay until you feel better
Yawning,the girl nodds and rubs her eyes-- cool--she wiggles a bit to find a comfortable space to lay on and she folds her arms over her chest. Her eyes feel heavy with sleep-- awesome- yknow? You guys are really good people- I mean yeah you hide behind snarky sarcastic comments but you care about us- so thank you.
He chuckles-- theres a lot you humans dont know about us.
--Yeah but we can tell when someone is good-- she added,a few words slurred-- and you guys are really good
Before he can say anything else,the girl falls asleep quietly. Body relaxing and leaning her whole dead weight on him,he barely even noticed it. But his gauntlet does lay its hand on the human to Keep tjem warm.
--Rest human,ill Keep you safe-- he murmurs before thinking "including from nightmares"
When strife comes by to switch with his youngest brother, War carries the human to a spare bed, not sure where her room was. He makes sure the covers are well laid on her and he takes a moment to appreciate the sight before him. Humans always looked so heavenly when they rested.
He decides he could get some rest of his own,so the red rider goes to find a quiet,dark corner of the tree to sit on and rest for a few hours. In his mind linger the words of the girl,War wonders just how much humans and nephilim were similar to eachother.
Humans,they really are an interesting thing.
54 notes
·
View notes
Text
I don't get the gist of Nightbow (Rainbow Steve x Nightmare) like, how does that work??
(warning I might rant so much y'all would explode, correct me if I'm wrong tho)
"enemies to lovers!" No. Lemme clear this up for you
Nightmare and Rainbow were created to kill each other, hate each other's guts, there is no conversation or part in SS or RQ where they went and be normal people talking to each other and stuff (not that I can think of anyways)
"for fun" I don't care if it's for fun, sure it's funny but like????? How is it y'all's favourite????
I'm someone who likes to go insane just watching plot, WHILE YES, STEVE SAGA WAS JUST A RANDOM STEVE SERIES AND WAS VERY RANDOM WHEN IT COMES TO PLOT, ITS SILLY, ITS RANDOM
But y'all are like "I can fix them", there is nothing to fix???? they are literally people wanting to kill each other and that is their goal.
Oh and let's not forget, I have my eyes on the people who write in Wattpad, don't think I have not seen their "freaky" writing at all.
It's not only Nightbow at least, I see the people here who ship Rainbow and Void together, same thing, but if we're talking SS then there was still no good interaction of them both to be on the level of actually being good friends. Still, Wattpad people are freaky about them too.
This can be implied to Favremyrainbow ig, but to me it's very bland and boring. I admit I did in fact ship them, but as time passed I just stopped because it was so cringe 💀💀
I don't want to be mean and rude when it comes to this but it bugs me every time.
Okay the only thing I can counter this is Alux x Petro.
Petro and Alux are basically Anna and Hanz in Frozen, gaslighting and manipulation exist but dynamic and trust are important. There is communication towards the two that leads into something in the plot.
Nightbow has none of that, they hate each other's guts. People say they can fix them, nah, with Palux you can make them worse (/j) HEJWJEJWJSJA
"Petro and Alux's entire dynamic is mainly built off of manipulation" YES but thats on Petro's side. Most people ship it due to it being tragic on Alux's side because everyone in this fandom likes doomed mlm i guess (I'm one of those people but again the plot reasons goes on for both of their dynamic)
"But he stabbed him" YES. I have not seen a single person who ships them currently its mainly a one sided ship. For alux its built off genuine love and care for Petro, knowing he's the only REAL connection in his life. The people who ship them (from what I've seen) mainly do it for tragedy and narrative purposes. no one is actually here WANTING alux to be stabbed and abused
And for Petro it adds much more conflict to his character if you add like any romance to him. like, loving the person your meant to kill and killing them anyways is a really interesting narrative plot idea. Its also really funny tbh but oh well.
Narratively it adds more to their characters as long as you dont romantize it and treat it like it'd be healthy especially at this point in the story.
This is literally doomed Yaoi (it's funny I wanna say that) and it works so well because of how they were narratively written this way towards each other. This cooked better than some enemy wanting to, excuse my language, have freaky SHIZ going on with the Hero 💀
Okay I'm done with my ranting I'm sorry for the people who like Nightbow but I'm sharing what I'm saying and y'all are gonna respect it and not be problematic. I feel like I should not be on the internet for a good while late and night this is how freaky I get when it's past midnight lmao
#favremysabre#steve saga#alux rising mentioned#nightbow#how does that ship even work????#feel free to block me because of this idc anymore#the fms fandom can get a bit too quirky and that would be my limit
24 notes
·
View notes
Text
haikyuu rewatch s01e01
i've been itching to rewatch the series lately and a few years ago i did something similar for miraculous ladybug where i wrote up like a stream of consciousness/commentary post and made a gifset for each episode and i wanna try to do it again for haikyuu?? we'll see if i stay committed or not lol—gifsets per ep probably a lot more likely to continue than commentaries tbh, these things are long and not thought out so,
anyway let's start with episode 1, who wants to take bets on how many times i get teary-eyed?
ughhhhh how did i not know IMMEDIATELY my first time watching what a fucking banger of a show this would be. this opening scene is sooo aah. the voice over with the sounds of the balls and shoes, the actual content of the 'a tall tall wall' monologue, and then the visuals of just hinatas shoes stepping up to the line and then 'it was a view i could never see on my own' and the rest of the teams shoes step in??? FUCK
holyyyyy and bc im obsessed i know who is who based on their shoes in that lineup and after thir 'onigaishimasu' and they run onto the court they all run in at different speeds?? and like tanaka goes quick and kageyama bounces on his toes and tsukki is all like unenthusiastic?? what the fuCK bro
its been literally 40 seconds and im in awe aaah
oh.. oh no it's the intro. i was joking before about getting teary-eyed but uhhh
how long has it been since i watched season 1 omgg 😭😭😭
gOD the opening is so good, not just imagination but the visuals rrr the practicing shots and the animation on all the volleyball looks so great wowow
one of the less talked about of the many crimes of getting movies instead of a 5th season is definitely the loss of another amazing opening and ending
damn did i really never realize that karasuno of the little giant's time didnt JUST go to nationals but theyre playing on center court when hinata catches them on tv? meaning its either the semi finals or finals, damn lol
hmmmm i am already conflicted about whether or not i wanna talk about manga spoilers in these writeups lmao. tumblr blockout spoiler text WHEN
anywayyyy manga readers hinata on his bike watching little giant on tv iykyk (and if you know me lol) right
rrrr the imagery of the crow flying into hinata from the screen with still the sounds of the balls and whistles aaah what a cool way to show inspiriation
huh, the libero is no.2 not no.4 is that manga accurate from just before furudate decided that it was a Thing for karasuno or did the animation not check?
okay i checked and you literally can only see the little giant in the manga and none of the rest of the team so im calling it an oversight on the animation side lol (understandable, tbh when youre just making people up to fill in the shot, you arent thinking about jersey lore)
no one cares but my japanese is surprisingly better than when i first watched (at which time i knew nothing) and i can actually understand a few bits here and there without the subs
reading the occasional katakana in the background is fun too. mmmm i should try looking at og scans of the manga to see how the sound effects are intended to be read, ive heard the way furudate incorporates the characters into the action as the sound itself is really well done
air salonpas!
oooo one of the teams practicing spikes had one guy hit left handed, thats a fun detail!
dude hinatas friends are such homies i swearrrr
'whats our opponent kitagawa daiichi even like' 'idk! but we're gonna win!' lmaooo hinata you coulda done SOME research
ooo the shot of kitagawa walking in and looming above hinata is so well done, they look huuuge. i know factually that kindaichi and kunimi are tall but i tend to forget, kunimi especially, hes got short energy to me 😅
yessss and the shot of kagyama walking by and just like his Aura is enough for hinata to pick up on the king vibes yooo its so goood
kitagawa daiichi banner is just 'victory' lol okay
i could use some of hinatas blind confidence in my life lmao
oh jk its bathroom tummy ache time
man the set up for kageyama as like powerful early on is SO good, weve only seen him twice so far and both times it all above the king cape, which im pretty sure is also supposed to represent how hinata sees him which rrrr what a great way to set up their dynamic knowing everything that's to come. greatest opponent to greatest ally etc etc
also thinking about how this IS basically all hinatas POV (including the quote i just referenced) and what kageyamas POV of hinata is when he looks back on it all 👀
kageyama telling hinata he shouldnt talk big bc he isnt even physically ready (referencing tummy ache), and hinata right off the bat telling kageyama 'the six of us go all the way' and kageyama responds 'i will win every game' oooo yep they both got some things to learn from each otherr
seriously how is hinata like the friendliest person on the planet. his team is SO bad and all he cares about is that he's finally on the court, he's so positive and determined even when they're doing terribly and his friends dont know wtf is going on
🥺🥺🥺 he's so happy seeing his palm all red after spiking the ball successfully the first time waaah
sjkhdk i always laugh at 'well there IS a foxy senpai on the girls team' lmaoo like he could have just ignored that part of the question, and who translated it to 'foxy' anyway lmaoo
koji, soccer friend, coming in for a foot receive! he missed lol but for real hinatas friends are so cool showing up for him like this
i mean, they are also avoiding him when he tries to practice throughout middle school, but they showed up here when it counts
love that you can see the 'mild internal bleeding,' as kuroo would call it, on izumi's arms when he tells hinata that his arms hurt lol
akjhsakjsasj they hype hinatas jumping skills, the music swells, you think hes got it, aaaand then immediately triple blocked and the music cuts back out lmaoo. honestly, love how haikyu always plays with expectations like that
half time serve routines my beloved.... i miss you..
'we keep trying.. because we havent lost yet' <333
but also kunimi, what a mood lmao
the animation on hinatas slide hit after the toss missss aaaah, and kageyamas bangs like whipping in the wind before he reaches as far as he can aah god this whole sequence is so beautiful
kageyama after knowing hinata for roughly 30 minutes: "this guy overwhelms me" skagsajsa
he has every quality to be someone even better but—WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING THESE PAST 3 YEARS?? 😭😭😭😭
karasuno senpai in the crowd!! related dumb question time, why isnt tanakas hair blond here? he should be a first year atm, and the beginning of the ep said this match is about 3 years and 3 months after little giants nationals (which is in january, although iirc the month changed sometime around those years so possibly it was in march during his time—hence why call 'spring tournament') but either way if hinata and kageyama are still middle school third years then tanaka should be a first year and thats when his hair was blonde. likely in universe answer i guess is just that this tournament is after the practice match where karasuno loses badly and gets made fun of which makes tanaka respect his senpai more and shave his head lol. which also, if hes here with them at this middle school tournament also makes sense with that so. question answered i guess
'if you want to be the last one standing then become strong' waaah
awwww the first years that he recruited to fill out his team stayed with him to practice with the middle school girls team!! they caught the volleyball bug <3
not me pausing to try and see which one of them is the foxy senpai..
lmaoooo the "old ladies team" that hinata practices with are called the yukigoaka beauties lol nice
yoooo hinatas running toward the gym for the first time and a crow flys away and a feather crossed in front of hinata niiiiice
let me tell you i had relatively low expectations for haikyu my very first time. i just wanted something easy to watch while i ate my lunch during the day, and i thought it would just be a predictable underdog story where hinata gets revenge for middle school. and i wasnt against that, i was relatively entertained this whole episode, then it gets to the end and reveals that kageyama has to be his teammate and i was like OH this is gonna be GOOD good. immediately have me hope and reassurance that the show knew what it was doing and wasnt gonna just be typical cliches etc
fuck i wish i could watch again for the first time
i warned you this would be long lol, honestly these writeups are more for me in the future to like remember my thoughts etc and like i said we'll see if i keep it up lol
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
Sai
Bayverse!Raph x reader
Shredders first attack on New York. No one knew who took him down, but what happens when a local photographer was able to snap a picture before the true hero's were able to make it into the sewer.
Part 4 of 4
ALL PARTS ON MY PAGE
"What the hell is coming through?" I asked
"Kraang" Donnie replied
"What is a kraang?" I panicked
"Well lets just say a very bad guy who is teleporting a very bad weapon here to destroy everything" Donnie said
"Well what are we waiting for?" Raph asked
"We cant just go out there, everyone will see us" Mikey said
"We have the serum" Leo replied
"Well be human on the outside, but the same on the inside" Donnie said
"I'll follow you" Leo replied
He passed the bottle to Raph, I glanced at him.
"Its up to you big guy" I whisper
He contemplated, lifting the bottle and throwing it at the wall.
I smile, "thats my red"
Raph and I have talked a lot about how he felt. Many late night conversations about how he wanted to fit in.
*flash back*
Sitting with Raph on his bed while he cleans his twin sai and I make us friendship bracelets.
"Do you ever wish, I don't know me and my brothers were human? So we could go out and do human things with you?" He asked
"No, honestly. ·sigh· Raph, I like how different this world is with you being you. For the first time in my entire life I'm actually happy. You remember the picture I took of you boys? Do you know how much I had wanted to meet you because you were different? You were unique and you all look absolutely perfect the way you do. There isn't a single scale I would change about any of you. Plus what we're doing now seems pretty natural. You, cleaning weapons while I finish our bracelets. I like this, I like how normal this feels. Plus who else is gonna bench press me? Who else can take me on late night roof top adventures? No boring man out there in this entire world would do one single thing you or your brothers have done for me. I love you just the way you are" I said
"Oh, you love me huh?" He smirked
"Oh shut it!" I laugh
Tying the bracelets off, "here red, lets see if it fits"
Gently Placing it on his wrist, black beads mixed with a deep red, a single sai jem hanging from both, "see, now me match"
"Yeah, the perfect match" he whispered
*end of flash back*
"C'mon boys, let go" Raph said with a smirk
As they head out Raph rushes back to me, grabbing my waist and pulling me into a deep kiss
"stay here okay? I'll be back to get you" he whispered
"Be safe, please" I whisper, pecking his lip a couple more times
"I'm always safe, princess" he winked
"Wait, how are you going to go out there?" I asked
"We have to convince the cops to help" he said
"Let me help please, I can help" I plead
He contemplated, "Fine, but as soon as its done you find somewhere safe okay? Closest entryway to the lair you go" he stated
Heading out and being surrounded by cops pointing guns at us, "hey, hey! Their the good guys!" I said
Standing in front of the boys as if I were some human shield.
April, Casey and that Vern dude there to help.
"How do we know that?" The woman asked, head of police maybe?
"Because the red one is my-" I pause looking at Raph
"Her boyfriend" he said with a smirk
"Your what?!" Casey shouted
"Oh shut up! Now's not the time" I said
"Their the hero's, they helped with shredder the first time" I explained
"Hey, falcon tell them" I glared
"Tell them what?" He asked, Raph cracked his knuckles
"Oh, huh that. Well you see they did stop him. I mean I helped but yeah they um they did" he explained
"Their the heros,the good guys. Not some monsters. Their out here doing your job" I said with a scowl
Raph grabbed my arm, "babe, we need their help, I know their dicks but we can gossip about them later" he whispered
Rolling my eyes, "please, help them stop this. Their the only ones who can" I begged
Finally, they agreed to help them.
"Alright, lets go" the chief said
The boys heading to the van, "you come back to me Raphael or I swear I will beat you up" I said, tears brimming my eyes
"I'll always come back to you princess" he smiled, pulling me into a long kiss
"Okay, when this is done we are absolutely talking about this" Casey said
"Yeah, yeah go save the world loser" I laughed
Watching them head off, taking a deep breath.
Rushing back to the lair, being met with Splinter
"So you and my son" he started
I blushed, "um, yes it new"
"I'm happy for you, I'm glad he has found someone who understands him. Now let me tell you some stories of when he was young" he said
*time skip*
After hearing tons of stories I'm sure Raph wouldn't be happy to hear I know, master splinter headed off to meditate and I wandered into Raph's room. Plopping on the bed, taking a deep breath. "Their okay, their okay" I whisper to myself
I decided to pass time by cleaning, I start with little things in Raph's room and move into the kitchen, then the living room.
Half way through the living room the boys run back in, "we did it!!" Mikey yelled
The boys coming to a halt in front of me, "are you cleaning?" Leo asked
"Oh, um I was bored and I just, when I get nervous my body needs to keep moving and it was getting late and I was worried so um yeah" I mumbled
"This place hasn't been cleaned in, well, forever" donnie said
"And we thank you for that" Leo said
"Yeah, come on princess I have some new stories" Raph said
Him and I walking to his room, "I'm glad your back home" I whisper
Making it to his room, he shuts the door and latches onto me.
"I'm home, I'm home with you" he whispers.
"Are you okay? Did you get hurt?" I asked
"Nothin this shell cant handle baby" he smirked
"We have to meet with the chief later something about a thank you or whatever, I want you to go as my plus one" he said
"Oh come on, red what was that little talk we had when we first met?" I teased
He rolled his eyes with a huff, "please"
"Yes, of course I'll come" I said
"Y/N L/N where are you!" I heard Casey shout
"Uh oh, someones in trouble" Raph teased
"Oh, be quiet" i laughed
We walked out into the living room, "can i help you?" I asked when I walked to Casey Raph not far behind, and soon a crowd of 3 turtles formed
"Ooo this is going to be good" Mikey said
I shot his a playful glare, "yes, Casey?" I smiled sweetly
"What's this? What's happening?" He asked pointing between me and Raph
"You heard him, my boyfriend. Which reminds me he never asked but thats a different conversation" I said
"I- what? Never mind, and you were planning on telling me when?" He said, hands on hips like a mother scolding her child
"Sorry, dad. The world wasn't just about to end or anything" I sassed
"Plus you should be happy I'm with someone who literally just saved the world" I followed
"Ugh, your so difficult" he groaned
"Fine I'm happy but no funny business, you understand? PG-13 when I'm around or E for everyone okay?" He scolded
I scoffed, "dude, we lived together and all those nights I lost sleep and gained trauma because of you, really?" I said
"Hey, don't change the subject" he exclaimed
"Fine, whatever" I said
He nodded, "okay then"
"You feel better now?" Raph asked
"So much better" Casey said letting out a breath
"Alright, we have an event to attend lets go" Leo said
After getting ready and heading out we made it, the boys received a key to new york.
Making sure I snap some pictures of them for splinters recent photo album I made him.
"Y'know everyone could know who you are. They would accept you" the chief said
"No I think we're better off in the shadows. If you need us you know who to call" Leo said
After the ceremony, Raph and his brothers went up the statue of liberty, seeing the joy and happiness, I captured one more picture.
*time skip* after the boys and I headed to the lair, Raph asked to take me out on an official date.
Blindfolded, clinging to his shell. "Just a little further" he said
Finally we stopped, felling a nice breeze. He set me down and slowly removed the blindfold.
The whole view of New York.
I gasped, "Raph it's-it's beautiful"
Looking down he had a whole picnic set up.
"Lets sit" he said guiding me down
"Look, i know our time has been short together but I trust you and I have strong feeling like I've never felt b'fore and I just I wanna tell you your important to me and I'm so glad ya came into my life. I wanna ask, will ya be my girlfriend? Officially?" He asked
"Yes! Yes of course I will" I shouted
Bringing him into a tight hug, placing kisses all over his face and finally a long drawn out one on his lips.
"My princess"
"My Red"
*time skip, 3 years later"
Nothing big has happened these past couple of years. The boys have their fair share of lowlife criminals to stop. No more attacks and such which I'm thankful for.
Today was a big day, my wedding day.
A small ceremony held on a piece of land overlooking new York late at night, just our family and a few friends.
Mikey, Leo, Donnie, April, Casey, splinter and Vern.
April as my bridesmaid and the boys as Raphs.
"Look at you cuz, all grown up"Casey said with glassy eyes
"Don't cry or I'll cry" I said laughing, my eyes watering
"You ready?" He asked
"I'm ready"
Looking our arms, he walked me down the white carpet isle.
One step at a time, closer and closer to my future.
As I made it to him, I saw tears falling down his face. Wiping them off, "hey red"
"Hey princess" he whispered
Splinter cleared his throat, "Our dearly beloved we are gathered here today, to celebrate love. To celebrate two beautiful souls merging into one. My dear boy Raph and his soulmate Y/N. Love has no boundaries, love sees no path but pure and true. I see bright futures for the both of you to have together, I see love, peace and wisdom. Hopefully grandchildren but that's for a different time" he stated
"Now, for your vows"
"Y/N, ever since meeting you I knew we would be close. The way you stood up to me and showed just how strong you are. Now, getting to spend the rest of my life with you, have a dream I never in a million years thought would come true but here I am the woman I love, here before me about to become my wife. There has never been a greater gift than this. I love you" Raph said, a few more tears shedding.
"Raph, my whole life I've looked for a purpose. A reason for myself and my reason is you. To love you, to support you, to be here and cherish everything you do. You have always been my rock, you always know how to make me the happiest girl alive. These past 3 years have been crazy but I would rather pick crazy then anything else. You are my world, my light. My Red. I have been given the best opportunity and that is to be your wife. I love you more then words, my love for you can never be measured. You Raph, your my hero" I said
"I now pronounce you, husband and wife. You may kiss your bride son" Splinter said
Raph pulled me into a deep wonderful kiss, a kiss that meant we were one.
Our new life, as husband and wife.
Forever bonded by true love.
Forever and always, love so bright. Love in the color of RED.
14 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hi! I have come to use my “ramble about oc’s for free ticket” 🎟️
Mkay so going to talk about the four I drew and posted about today hope you don’t mind :3
Okay so Cassandra first. She definitely dresses up more shall we say risqué when it comes to Halloween. Her and Aqulia (I believe I have mentioned him before to you) always match outfits. Until she gets a little one who wants to dress up and go trick or treating. Then suddenly it’s planning about a hundred different mom and daughter duo costumes.
She drags Spurgeon along because to complete her vision for a costume someone has to play as a wolf.
Spurgeon is the definition of ‘dad who acts like he doesn’t care but cares far too much’ so he puts on this whole air of, I don’t want to come, just you two go, I have xxx to get done. But the moment Cassandra suggests getting someone else to dress up with them he’s suddenly free the whole evening. Cough cough Jealousy cough
And he would commit to playing the role of the big bad wolf, only to fail. Little sheep who just wants her dad. Yeah, there’s like zero fear whatsoever.
Candy bag getting heavy? No problem, just eat the treats as you walk. See? Problem solved.
And yes Zeep has a candy bar. His favorite are Twix. And he had to tag along too though he probably hides in the bag and only pops out once it’s too late for the group to turn back.
Anyways I love them a lot hehe. Fictional mom and dad who I spend way too much time thinking about and I’m kind of embarrassed to share because I never know how to talk about my oc’s
oh my god the planned costumes together i'll admit it makes me so so weak 😭 and pretending he's not interested at all until someone else could join and then being like UH ACTUALLY YK WHAT...
and thats so cute big scary wolf except the little sheep is like ":D HUGS!!" and being carried i love it....
and also im gonna agree w that!! you need the energy to keep going around to other houses too just saying!!! and there was definitely some smuggling into that bag for zeep until the coast was clear and Ohh nooo We're too far from home to turn back... what a shame.... (at least he fits the theme :P!!) also twix are good (<- used to eat them layer by layer |D)
ALWAYS!!! feel free to come ramble to me abt them!! golly knows half the time i post abt Bones its for me and not for my ocs and the other half IS for my ocs. and me also but WAUGH!! OCS AND FICT CGS/PARENTS I LOVE IT!!!! I LOVE THIS!!!!
2 notes
·
View notes
Note
prime numbers
thats a lot of fucking questions anon jesus christ
2. what would you name your future kids?
answered
5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?
this photo of ray toro it's my emergency ray and even when literally suicidal it has never filed to rouse a smile out of me
7. what was your life like last year?
amazing. last year was the best year of my life so far. i did so much cool shit i never imagined i would do i felt so free and full of life i felt like the whole world was at my fingertips
11. are you listening to music right now?
yes! this morning we're doing please catch for us the foxes mewithoutyou. i'm on tie me up! untie me! rn on my second repeat of the album. thinking about maybe throwing in an rtl or even a bullets after this playthru tho 🤔
13. how do you feel right now?
pretty good! well mostly neutral i suppose but i'm up early for work i'm already showered i don't have much to do and i've still got over an hour before i gotta go so this is a rare W for me im pleased w myself. i'm usually always up late and in a mad rush
17. opinion on insecurities.
bizarre question. um they're not good and when they're overwhelming in someone they're off-putting but we all have them and i am in many ways a simpering wad of insecurity so im hardly gonna throw stones about it. i think what is very frustrating tho is when ppl can't admit to them.
19. have you ever been to New York?
nope!
23. fear(s)
needles, unexpected spiders
29. favourite film(s)
the crow!!!
31. 3 random facts
about me or in general? umm 1. you can dissolve ping-pong balls in acetone to make a very strong glue 2. im allergic to the cold but no-one ever believes me until they see it for themselves because that sounds absolutely ridiculous 3. many viking houses were built in the shape of an inverted ship, with curved roofs and sometimes curved walls.
37. favourite actor/actress
huh. i don't think i really have one. i mean i have actors and actresses who are in things i like and who i think are good but i don't think i could point to one as a favourite. maybe david tennant but that's just sort of because he's everywhere in everything and he was(/is) doctor who
41. relationship status
single who want me
43. favourite song ever
no. we're not doing that. that doesn't exist
47. turn ons
um. nothing good. well, love. but mostly mean weird stuff. shhhhhh its fine im normal i am normal
53. 5 things that make me happy
music/concerts/moshpits
images of whoever my latest Guy (gender-neutral) is
exactly 3 glasses of wine. no more no less
talking 2 friends hanging out with friends having positive social interaction
the sense of achievement when i actually get some shit done i needed to do
59. why i joined tumblr
when i was 14 all my friends were into the whole Tumblr Aesthetic and kept referring to ppls outfits as 'so tumblr' and i wanted 2 figure out what that meant. i bet they're all long gone i bet they don't even think about this website anymore
#this took forever cause i kept getting distracted lol sry#also some of these were hard 🤔#ask#anonymous
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
I just finished season 4 and unlike with the others I didnt have a whole lot to say as a was watching, mainly because I was actually enjoying myself and thought the season was mostly really good ? absolutely wild. Nevertheless I have some thoughts
I LOVE Alya and Marinette working together, its a delight. When I talk about "man can you imagine if MLB did like a magical girl show and focused on female friendships instead of catfighting" THIS is what Im talking about!! And Idgaf about how this affects the Love Square at this point, this is all Ive wanted! Also, I feel like Alya and Nino knowing each others identities cheapens the Love Square conflict more than anything but I cant fully articulate why so I'll just leave it at that
The Love Square is in a very strange place where, when the identity reveal finally does happen, its simultaneously going to feel like its too little too late (a la the destiel confession bc this fucking show is just straight queerbaiting) and rushed because like. what kind of development is there between these two. They barely focused on romance this season (which is definitely part of why I think its better lol) but I dont mean that in the sense that we had less catfights and Marinette making a fool of herself for no reason, I mean that in the sense that it barely felt like they interacted at all, atleast to me so thats kinda odd
In the past Ive complained about how the civillian plotline usually feels very disconnected from the superhero/akuma plotline and I think theyve done a much better job, my favorite episode of the season is probably Qilin both for tying the akuma into the civillian plot and for having a somewhat unique conflict resolution. In general, I liked that we had people rejecting akumas as well as preventative measures in form of the charms, although I do think it sucks that a few episodes afterwards Shadowmoth just figures out a way to circumvent them and then its back to business as usual. I feel like a better workaround would be that the charms can only protect you from one akumatization each, so like, the charm Ladybug gave her grandfather in Simpleman can only protect him from becoming Simpleman again, but if he turns into Bakerix, she needs to give him a different charm. But I do find the charms cute
The new heroes all suck tbh, the only design I liked was Purple Tigress and Pigella came close to looking kinda good but then they made it this intensely unflattering shade of pink, which I find impressive because Rose is already wearing an completely different intensely unflattering shade of pink in her civillian form. One thing that I appreciated about whatever Mylenes superhero form is called, Pigella and Purple Tigress is that they had more justifiable reasons for Ladybug to pick them than most of the heroes in the last season, who were mostly just picked because They Were There ig. And then Penealteam rolled around and we were back to doing exactls that kind of bullshit. great.
Also, Ive already talked about this in a seperate post, but if they absolutely insisted on looking for a replacement for the Bee, it shouldve been Sabrina and they shouldntve invented a whole new character for it
Adrien got a little more focus this season and we actually got some insight into his character when hes not either The Object Of Marinettes Idolization or Ladybugs Punny Sidekick Thats Slowly Becoming Obsolete which I enjoyed because he has a lot of potential from a dramatic standpoint what with being Hawkmoths son and all, but hes usually so bland that I dont really care too much so this was pretty nice. And it only took us 4 seasons for him to get some focus, yknow, the other superhero in the title? Well better late than never I guess
Speaking of Adrien, Ive made quite a few posts where I said that this season would be ruined for me the second the Sentiadrien reveal happens but it never did, we're getting that in season 5 and I am not looking forward it especially considering the small taste Ive already gotten of it with Adrien being very obviously controlled by that ring. Like, I'll probably talk about it in more detail when it gets fleshed out in the show but for now I'll just say it doesnt make the stakes higher like the writers seem to think, it make the story wayyyy less interesting and it feels like its supposed to be an explanation for Adriens behaviour towards his father when we absolutely do not need one beyond "hes being abused"
I know I said that I thought this season was really good and now Im just just complaining mostly like I always do but idk, Im not as good at formulating my positive thoughts as my negative ones. The last thing I'll say is that I loved Scarabella and I loved her design and I loved the whole episode she was in, as well as the entirety of Sentibubbler, Alya really served this season
Thats it, thanks for reading :D
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
These past few weeks have been rough. I haven't been able to find any work this week except for one day which means my next paycheck won't be nothing at least but still be very little and me and my boyfriend have to somehow scramble for money to try to make rent. We fortunately have a week grace period on rent so we at least have a week after the 1st to come up with the money and we get paid weekly so hopefully I'm able to at least get full time hours next week.
Due to all the free time I have and extra spoons I got from not working as much, I've actually been able to get some cleaning and laundry done, I didn't get as much done as I had hoped but it's better than what it was at least. So that's a positive.
On the system side of things though it's been rough. I mean because of this whole financial issue we've obviously been very depressed. On top of that we've been getting triggered a lot more than usual and I'm not sure what's the cause and it's just been a whole mess. We've also been dealing with some recently discovered eps that have a very unhealthy and toxic relationship with each other which makes us feel very uncomfortable and some of us feel shameful for having these parts in the system so I won't talk about it much it's just been another whole mess. Eps have been around a lot lately which I mean makes sense I think with everything else going on but it can be stressful having them around and I feel bad for feeling that way and it's a whole thing. Anyways yeah its been a mess. And after getting that out of the way I also wanted to talk about positive updates: not all the anps have been discovered and found and that might take some time anyways and there's some alters who are like undetermined because anp/ep labels can be kind of confusing when applying it to certain alters but a missing anp started popping up again and he's still really distant from the rest of the group but he came back from whatever and has talked to us a few time so progress yes? We're learning more about how we're structured everyday and simultaneously being confused by it. I would attempt to explain the layers and subsystems and inner world structure but uhh I can hardly explain it to my therapist and it's pretty convoluted and a lot is still undiscovered and inaccessible. So uh yeah thats an update I guess.
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
gonna ramble about boytoy on here bc i rly wanna keep talking abt him but i dont wanna annoy my friends lmao ik they love me n are happy ive got someone im into but im on my obsessive bullshit againnnn kms lmao
2nd date was a rly nice time!!! and like its been a fucking minute since ive been physically intimate with anyone let alone like emotional intimacy and to be fair and not insane, we've still got a lot of getting to know each other but hes been so sweet?? like genuinely so sweet and considerate and i??? was not expecting it honestly, like ive never rly been with a man before and i dont like to make generalizations, i have male friends who are so lovely and compassionate, but tbh most of them are queer, i can think of like one (1) straight male friend that im close to and makes me feel safe lmao. but this guy, i immediately felt comfortable with him and that i could be myself and be weird and corny n shit and he'd be into it lmao and its been rly nice like he held space for me to kind of vent about what ive been going through lately (its been some shit yall) and he was v kind and comforting abt it and???? idk it feels like he wants me to rly open up to him and it feels safe to????
im trying to stay cool and not come on too strong or put too many emotions out there bc i dont wanna scare him and i've done that before with people, ive gotten rly invested in ppl and gotten the rug pulled hard and im honestly scared abt that happening again. like when it happened there was all this physical intimacy and things she said that made me think she wanted more and then she actually didnt and im honestly terrified thats gonna happen with him because i didnt expect it last time, it felt this close last time and then it actually wasnt and it broke my brain. she and i worked it out and we're cool now but it was such a shock and im so scared about getting invested too much too fast and then getting the rug pulled again. like theres been like really connected physical intimacy like he held my hand when we were making out and when we were fucking it was so sweet and i???? i'm so scared to read more into everything im trying to just take him at his word and not get caught up in the physical intimacy but he seems to be really like dedicated to making sure i feel comfortable with him and cared for?? and i do?? and im just scared it doesnt mean as much to him as it means to me because it means a fucking lot like its been so long since i could just relax with a partner and not worry if im doing enough for them or if they need anything or how to maintain their emotional stability like i feel like can just relax around him and its so nice and im just scared that its not as important to him as it is to meeeeee ughhh
he said he likes how easy going i am and that a lot of people around him are high strung and he feels like he can be himself around me too so like i think theres something there but again last time she said a lot of shit that made me feel special and then it turned out i wasnt so??? i really dont know it seems weird to be so like sweet and open and caring if theres nothing substantial behind it?? and he said he wasnt ready for a relationship which i agree with like i dont think im ready either?? but i know i really like him and i could maybe see us making it work it just sucks bc we both live w our parents and he's an hour away in another town so idk how practical it really is???? but i also know i dont wanna see anyone else and i frankly dont want him seeing anyone else, like if we take the non-monagamy route thats fine i can chill w it and there are other people id be open to meeting but honestly if i dont have to i dont want to lmao. i dont think he realizes he could lock me down right now if he wanted to because he popped the 'what do you want from this' question while we were on shrooms lmao and thats not the best time to get coherent answers from me abt things, my brain is mush and making sentences is hard when im on them so i wasnt able to explain myself as well as i wouldve liked but i think i made it clear i rly like him and wanna see where this goes so???? im not gonna pop the exclusivity question until like date 5 or so i think bc im really not trying to rush this even if i want toooooo ughhh
and goddamn that boy can fuck im????? so horny and so horny for himmm its fucking annoyingggg especially since he said he was busy this week :(( like boy idc ill hang at ur place til u get home and rail me chain me up in ur room for all i fucking careeee i feel like im in fucking heat its crazyyy i want him to dom the shit out of me and i wanna be a crazy brat to him and im gonna be such a menaceeeee i wanna make this mans life a living hell is the sexiest way possibleee bc i know I Know if i rile him up he will absolutely destroy me and i want that so badddddd
#foaming at the mouth over a man i never thought id live to see the day#uuughghghghghg#fucking help me wtf is happening to me
0 notes
Note
Yeah christmas is so close now i can't believe it, we're in the single digits!
Its the same in germany, we have the christkind.
Crocheting is so cool! Results always look so pretty it seems fun. Do you have a favorite thing to crochet?
That's cool that you're getting tested for it! I hope the results help you long term <3. Lots of food thats cool :D. Spicy pizza sounds.. interesting.
I've been good more or less, i?m finally done with exams now, only six more to go in all of school 🥹 + one oral final. I have my mock-finals in march and then my final exams in may and then i'm done its insane.
I'm still missing some christmas presents, but i'm hoping to get them next week. After that i can finally chill more or less, still have a lot of plans my holidays are basically fully booked, but its fun.
I finally finished my social science project thing! I finished it yesterday morning before i left to go to a christmas market with my dance group in the afternoon. We spent like 5 hours there, it was fun. I had eyeliner and mascara onbc why not (i very rarely wear makeup and if i do its eyeliner and maybe mascara, i touch my face way too much it would get smudged 😔), and nobody told me that it smudged at some point so i was walking around with smudged mascara all day 😭. It didn't look too bad luckily, just more of a smoky eye than anticipated. I got more christmas socks too. (Important stuff). l had a small hangover today very mean lmao. Currently in the train on my way home from dance training (we don't even get a break when everyone including the trainer is hungover lmao). It was nice tho. The train is very full because there's a football game on in the city this train is heading to, all the windows are fogged up from condensation trains in winter are pure hell 💔. But you gotta do ehat you gotta do.
I wrote that this morning and forgot to send it (i always prewrite my asks in my notes app so i can check your responses and answer them lol). I had another board game night with friends today and we played several new games it was very fun!
How have you been? It feels like I've not managed to talk much with you apart from the countdown lately 😔.
-Luan
Good evening <333
I don't really have a favourite thing to crochet, but right now I'm attempting a top :3
Damn, good luck with those exams!
Same, I don't have enough presents and in consequence Christmas doesn't feel like Christmas :(
Yay congrats on the social science project!
Yeah that's what I like about mascara, usually when it smudges you can just smudge it on the other side equally and it looks like it's intended lol
Aaaa trains in winter nooo that is truly a sensory nightmare for me, plus all the clothes xd
Lol you're taking this so seriously, it's cute :3
I'm glad you enjoyed your board games!
I'm fine, I was at a concert today again, but I played only in one number and then I could leave. Tomorrow we have two exams, and then we're finally done for this calendar year (the teachers already scheduled a fuckton of other exams on the week immediately after Christmas but that's a problem for future me OwO). And other than that… well we baked some Christmas sweets (sádlové kuličky, i genuinely have no idea what they're called in English or any other language lol) today with my brother and mother, and that's about it.
Good night Luan <333
0 notes