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hspolls · 2 years ago

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Well, there we have it! End of Round 1. Let’s to a little Round Roundup before moving onto Round 2!

The Dolorosa tried to scare our favourite Egbert off, but- Well, Dolorosa was left in the past and Egbert moved on. On to Round 2, at least!

It was a brutal battle between the great and mighty Nicolas Cage and the underdog fedorafreak, but fedorafreak and his support pulled through. A God Tier battle if I’ve ever seen one!

The forces of Light and Void came face to face in the battle between Roxy and Aranea. Dark beat Light in this valiant battle, congrats to our winner Roxy!

The battle between Erisolsprite and Tavrisprite was not so... bright. Erisolsprite has his torment prolonged for one more round.

A battle between... brothers? Lovers? It’s not clear what the relationship is between these two. But either way, Trace wins the vote and moves onto the next round!

Caliborn and The Condesce face off in our next matchup, but it seems Caliborn just can’t reach his full potential yet (Will he ever...?). The Condesce takes the win!

Our two gun (rifle?) slingers are up next in the next round. And...! Oh, how the mighty fall! Aimless Renegade wins this duel!

Kanaya faces off against ARquius sprite, two wholes put together to make a new whole! And. Uh. Well, he’s more two halves now. Kanaya wins!

Rose and Marquise Spinneret Mindfang face off, a battle so blindingly bright that... Well, we know how blindings go for Mindfang, historically. Rose progresses onwards!

I liked these tags and they deserve to go here. Seems like Die can't really hold his own in a rap battle. Unfortunate. He's always been a bit chicken.

GCATavrosprite is scheduled to face off against Jasprose...! But decides to take a little nap instead. You know what? He deserves it. Sleep well our sweet little meow meow. Jasprose wins by default.

Sollux and Terezi are pitted against each other. To every Sollux fan’s despair. Sorry guys. I really thought he had a chance. Interesting first round, though, right?

Davepeta and Fefeta face off in a matchup that, once again, was met with a lot of despair. Davepeta would never do a thing to harm their dear friend (and half paradoxical twin? alternate self? sister? Whatever they’d be...) And spares her, not only in the battle, but from the rest of her fights. Fefeta never wanted to fight anyway. A “win” for Davepeta!

Davesprite kicks Bro’s ass lol. (Talk about closure...!)

Two tallguys in this matchup! A battle between Crowbar and Sawtooth. Both are pretty powerful, but the felt fans are stronger. #feltsweep

The battle between Mom and Cans is less of a battle and more of a landslide. For Mom. She punches Cans into next week. Taste of his own medicine!

Jack Noir battles Becquerel, in a test of who will become BEST DOG. And. Well. Its the dog. Its the dog.

Meanwhile, Snowman and Ms. Paint battle... to see who wore it best! And Ms. Paints sweet charm is just pure unbeatable! Onto the next round she goes!

Meanwhile, in the Jade and Rufioh faceoff... It’s a win for Jade. No contest, really.

Elsewhere on the battlefield two revolutionaries battle, to change their worlds. The Signless inspires many, and does a lot to help his people... But still, the Warward Vagabond moves more. And moves onto the next round, too.

Nepeta and Stitch are our next matchup, and...! Well, dear number Nine might need some stitching himself after this ruthless battle.

Gamzee and Grandpa, two Gs. I... don’t have any smart comments for this battle actually. Just the G thing. And Gamzee takes the W. Which I guess would make him Wamzee? Yeah, sure. That’s what I’m, choosing to say.

PM and Meulin up next! And... Woah, that’s a twist! PM caught Meulin sending some nasty hate mail. And did what any good Postal Mistress would do. Seems Meulin may be down another life...

Jadesprite challenges Lil Hal, but Lil Hal is not relinquishing control to a sad dog girl. Sorry dog girl fans. Lil Hal goes ahead.

CASEY SWEEPS ROUND ONE LET’S GOOOOOOO (Yeah, no. Caliborn will never reach his full potential.)

The Handmaid, however, is very powerful. More powerful than even Darkleer, once a powerful figure himself. The Zahhak is put out of his misery... into the darkness of history he shall disappear. “History” is too restricting for the Handmaid, who moves ever forwards.

The Insane Clown Posse prepare for one of their famed demonstrations, miracles ready, face paint on... But wait, who let this fucking cat in here? What the hell? Oh my god, Holy--

The ICP are dead. The cat remains, paws bloodied, face adorable.

Itchy seems to have the advantage in his battle, moving faster than any eye can see- but the Summoner summons his own loyal fans, and... the battle’s over before either of them know it.

There’s a bit of infighting going on in the Midnight Crew’s side of the ring, with Hearts Boxcars and Clubs Deuce feuding between themselves. It seems like HB should win, being stronger, burlier, and capable of eating a mans head off in one fell bite. But Clubs has something the big guy doesn’t. Clubs has a hand full of penis. And he is not afraid to get swinging. Ultimately, HB bites the dust.

Next up is the Disciple and Horuss. With the Disciple on the other end of the indigo’s bow, he falters just as his universal counterpart did, so many sweeps ago. He doesn’t shoot. The Disciple survives for one more round.

Two of Egbert’s guardians battle in a fight for supremacy, but there can only be one winner. Dad continues on... but not without Nanna’s blessing. He is her son, after all. And perhaps all she really wants is to see him succeed...

Aradia and Tavros participate in a battle between friends, but Aradia’s bold plays give her an edge that Tavros simply doesn’t have. Aradia wins this battle - and Tavros surely comes along to cheer his friend along for the following ones!

Jake attempts to face off against this blue babe before she has the chance to gain momentum - the only chance anyone may have to truly strike her down. But he can’t. He’s stricken down... The first one to fall against Vriska’s pursuit of supremacy. If he can’t stop her......

Meenah, like Horuss, follows in the footsteps of her universal counterpart, harnessing the power of the Ψiioniic in the hopes their combined power could do what Jake couldn’t Vriska lurks in the distance of the next round. One goldblood is hardly anything in the face of victory.

Redglare battles against a child and loses. Unforunate. Well, she had a good run. Before the tournament. Her run in the tournament sucked. Unfortunately. Sorry Redglare. Jane wins this trial.

Feferi and Kankri face off in a debate for the ages -- Or rather, Kankri debates at her, but her joyful outlook is too powerful to be destroyed by the redbloods gift of gab. Feferi rules over this round!

Calliope and Cronus participate in a battle of music, something I just decided since I think Cronus canonically makes music and Calliope is the name of an instrument. Well, Cronus is the one getting played this round. Calliope dominates the soundscape in this battle!

Kurloz and Damara get into an argument, though its hard to tell exactly what they’re arguing about because nobody else speaks troll Japanese and Kurloz doesn’t really say much of anything. Well, either way, looks like Damara won that battle!

Battle of the Bronies! It’s Dirk against Equius in this battle of pride, to determine who the ultimate pony aficionado is. And what do you know, Dirk comes out on top.

A battle between Leprechauns is breaking out on this side of the field. And its not really clear how the battle is progressing at all. Doze is moving a metre an hour and Eggs is just... kinda there? As unclear as the whole thing is, Eggs apparently wins this one!

In the next matchup over we have another one of the Leprechauns, Quarters, up against Latula, who doesn’t doesn’t hesitate to annihilate our turtle-toothed friend. Latula 1, Quarters 0.

And right there next to him, Biscuits gets swept too, annihilated by the smooth Diamonds Droog. Effortlessly. At least, that’s how it looks, and what he wants you to think. Will his next round be as effortless, or will this Diamond be done for? Only time can tell.

In a repeat of troll history, Dualscar faces off and against the Grand Highblood, and. Well. Heads off too. (That’s a joke. About decapitation. If it wasn’t clear). Dualscar doesn’t survive this round, but the GHB marches on to the next.

Next is the battle between two big story influencers, the arrogant Doc Scratch and the, uh, controversial Andrew Hussie, to see who reigns supreme. And Doc Scratch takes the cake this time. Sorry Hussie. Maybe next time.

Clover distracts matchsticks with a jaunty little jig and then Matchsticks gets flustered and fucking dies. RIP matchsticks. Clover’s moves were just too fire.

Karkat faces off against Sawbuck, who... Well, I’m sorry Sawbuck. There weren’t many people left to match you up with at this point in the planning stage and you got fucking murdered the moment you stepped into the ring. Your fans still love you though. Poor guy.

Dave and Mituna faces off in what was perhaps THE most despaired of the matchups. I’m sorry guys! I was running out of matchups that would keep the game both initially interesting and interesting in the future! It’s just the way the turns tabled!

Dave wins the round, but Mituna fans everywhere are united in their love for this goldblooded boy. He may just be the most mourned of all this round’s losers, but he is a winner in all of our hearts.

And lastly, the battle between Madam Firefly and the dear Firefly herself, which... Wait. Hold on. What’s this? They both tied at 50%? Serenity technically won by a few votes but the poll-holder had a special even planned in the case of a 50/50 and is going to enact it anyway? Well, that’s certainly something! Props to these two lovely ladies for sharing the win this round! And in the distance...

A SPECIAL CHALLENGER APPROACHES...

#hspolls #round 1 #round roundup #long post

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