#wanted to convey Nimbus's struggle! show that while she loves 8&9. she also wishes that it wasnt a double edge sword with her new status

[forthedancingandthethriving]

(Nimbus angst? Nimbus angst. Im still thinking about those tags, how dare you do this to me Duckapus /j)

Tw: minor blood, minor self-harm

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She bows, her tail flicks.

The roaring applause, the cheering. Behind her, she hears Queen Melody clap.

Nimbus forces a smile as she raises back up. No one can tell. They never can.

As the queen rises from her throne, she gives a nod to Nimbus, and she turns and takes her leave. Her shoes make soft clacks against the polished floor of the hallway as she leaves the foyer of the castle.

The oak door shuts behind her, and Nimbus lets out a breath she knows she was holding. She slumps against the door and grips the top of her head.

Very nearly she blew the performance. So closely, she nearly let those urges of being an idiot get the best of her. A violinist was playing off tune the entire time, and she wanted to snark at them, say something stupid.

But she didn't, thank everything above.

Her claws un-sheath, and they dig into the top of her head. Blood spills, and it stains her white fur. She finds it distracts her, even for a moment.

But Nimbus nearly revealed herself again. She nearly revealed the truth again.

She lets out a shuttering breath, closing her eyes. She removes her claws and puts her paws down. Gently, she hits her head back against the oak door.

It was getting harder every day. Bottling it up. Masking it. SMG8 and SMG9 kept warning her that she couldn't do this forever. It was going to explode in her face. She had to be herself.

But this was her. The calm and collected Nimbus. The balanced Nimbus.

Not.. not some crazy idiot.

I shouldn't think like that, she chastises herself quickly, Some of her new, closest friends are like her. None of them were crazy idiots. It wasn't their fault they were like this.

Nimbus exhales, looking at the ceiling. She didn't mind being the Avatar of her world. But she minded being compelled to do all sorts of strange things. She cared deeply for 8&9, and if it came down to it, she'd lay down her life for them. But she sometimes found herself wishing that.. they became friends a different way.

She stands and un-sheaths her claws again. Her eyes gaze down at them, stained with some of her blood. Her head aches a bit, but she finds she doesn't care.

With a sigh, Nimbus sheaths her claws once more, and turns, going to walk-

"Nimbus?"

The Songbird stops and turns. There, in the doorway, stands Queen Melody. The queen is looking at her, confused.

Instantly, Nimbus schools her face, putting on a calm and collected smile. "Ah, Queen Melody. May I ask why you're here and not with the guests?"

"Ambrosia is handling them." the queen smiles lightly at the mention of the court jester, and Nimbus nods.

(She wonders if her life would be easier if she were the court jester. Would she be able to finally be the Avatar this code so badly wanted her to be?)

"But are you alright, my dear?" the queen steps out of the doorway, and the door shuts behind her. "I thought you would be in your chambers by now, resting."

"Oh, I'm fine, your majesty." Nimbus smiles, ears flicking. "I just needed a moment to de-stress, that's all. It was quite a long performance today."

Queen Melody falls quiet, gazing at the Songbird. Nimbus's heart begins to beat faster, and her expression falls for a quarter of a second.

"You're bleeding, my dear." Queen Melody points at her head and the Avatar's heart drops.

Nimbus reaches up and gingerly touches her head. She smiles again, trying to remain calm. "Oh, I am. It seems like maybe I should go and get this checked, my queen. I'll be taking my leave now."

"Nimbus-!" Queen Melody reaches out a paw, but the Norwegian forest cat is already too far for the birman cat to say anything more.

The queen pulls her paw to her chest, face falling, and her ears pinning to her head.

She wasn't blind to how Nimbus was acting. She knew something was wrong and that it correlated with the strange USBs that fell from the sky all those years ago.

She knew the entire kingdom had changed after that. People became.. stupider, in a sense. More inclined to do dumb things. Queen Melody included, but she did well at masking it.

The queen knew Nimbus was masking as well, but she couldn't tell because of what.

Maybe she could ask SMG8. Finally get some answers.

As the queen turned back to the door, her eyes caught the small droplets of blood on the floor. She kneeled down and swiped at it.

It was still fresh.

Queen Melody's heart dropped and she looked in the direction Nimbus had gone.

"Nimbus.." she whispers softly.