#vs nik who sees the cogs turning in his brain and thinks “about fuckinh time” but he'll let john go at his own pace

[laswells-ashtray]

Nikolai acquires a box of sweet treats one day, fancy pastries that were undoubtedly overpriced for things that's are done in three bites.

That day, he hand feeds John much to his own delight. Swatting away the English man's hands whenever he tries to reach for and insist, "I can feed my bloody self, Nik." Because Nikolai enjoys it, more than anything in the world, he enjoys taking care of John and using his thumb to swipe away the cream at the corner of his mouth.

John wants to hate it, desperately wants to hate it because he can not stand the feeling that someone else has to take care of him and that he can't do it himself. But it's different with Nik, he wants Nik to tell him what to do. Wants Nikolai to take care of him, wants to suck the cream from the tip of his thumb and maybe unbuckle his trousers while he's at it. And he doesn't know what to do with that at all.