#virgil somehow isnt mentioned in this

[princeanxious]

(Black) Rose Petals

My anxceit brain rot is acting up again, so i wanna share this brief(<- lol 3 hours later and this is a whole oneshot fic whoops) idea that just hit me

Cw: an altered take on hanahaki as a concept, brief blood mentions but nothing too graphic i think, HURT/COMFORT, happy ending! Lemme know if i missed anything!

So like. Human/high fantasy au with a surprise appearance of hanahaki but its worldly existence is that of just some extremely rare and nasty spell/curse that can be cast on others unlucky enough to run into a being heartbroken enough to cast it.(or something. Idk.)

So uh. Janus is a prince, Virgil is a prince from a different kingdom, and following the backstory of them being really close as childhood friends, but something changed and they broke apart suddenly & violently. And unfortunately, both were far too prideful to admit their fallingout was due to a mutual effort(however unintentionally caused) and have refused to even consider rekindling their friendship until the other breaks and apologizes first, much to their kingdoms' frustation and dismay.

At the starting point of this would-be story, Janus and Virgil would have been avoiding eachother for about 6 years(both having been roughly 16 at the time of their falling out, making them roughly around 22 at this point), and their allyship is tenuous at best, though unreflective of their kingdoms stronger connections.

It stands to not that there has been times where theyve met during those six years, always unintentionally and unfortunstely never ending well. Though theyve long since learned to simply ignore eachother for the peace of their kingdoms, rumor has it that the first few encounters after the initial fallout were shouting matches fit enough for rivals.

It's always been unclear to the public why such a toxic fallout had occurred so suddenly between such close friends, and while their were hundreds of ideas and rumors guessing why, no one would know that even Virgil himself didnt know.

The only one who had the full story was Janus. And it drove Virgil crazy to no end.

They'd never kept secrets from eachother before, so when Janus started to close off from Virgil, he'd worried he'd messed up somehow. But Janus wouldnt explain it, even when he assured him it wasnt Virgil's fault.

And when Virgil just wouldnt let it go, Janus changed tactics. Even when guilt and regret filled him with every nasty jab he'd thrown, Janus felt this was the safest option.

Virgil couldnt know, could never know that Janus loved him, or Virgil would hate him for it, or find it weird that Janus loved his best friend this way and leave, and Janus knew he couldnt take the pain of rejection of Virgil leaving because of his love.

So, Janus chose to make Virgil hate him instead. Janus couldnt have Virgil, he was convinced of it(for some reason, perhaps bc one of them was already betrothed at a young age or smth else that isnt outright real world homophobia bc i want a happy ending w/out extra strings on that end dang it), and felt it was better to break apart what they had with false vitriol than with his confession of love. Safer, even.

Better to love from afar knowing he could never have what he wanted, than stay close by and let his hurting heart consume his rationale and fracture everything they could've had if he ever slipped up.

The act was easier with every year that went buy, even as his heart never stopped yearning, never stopped hurting. Even when there were times, few as they were, where Virgil seemed to think about breaking the tenuous peace with an olive branch. Bare glimpses of the person Janus fell in love with all those years ago.

And it hurt his heart all the more when Janus turned them down each time, turning the offer of reconciliation away with a bitter resolve that stemmed more from his own self-inflicted pain than anything else.

(He doesnt notice that the bitterness has begun leak into everything he does. Doesnt realize how blinded its making him to the way hes begun to act to everyone else around him, not just Virgil.)

He just had to stop loving Virgil, then barrier could come down for him to accept, or rather, finally offer an olive branch of his own.

That's all.

(He was lying to himself, though. Virgil had never done anything that could make Janus stop loving him, despite having every reason to return Janus's unwarranted venom two-fold. The bastard. Why couldnt Virgil make things easy and just hate Janus already?)

And then, well. Something goes wrong.

An outting, a request for Janus and his father, King Remy, to attend a meeting in a neighboring kingdom's castle.

It was supposed to be a simple little trip. A simple regular meeting of allies for any updates and the like. Using simple straightforward path through the enchanted forest that seperates their kingdoms.

Janus shouldnt have bothered to count himself so lucky as to expect his life to stay simple. Not when he keeps making stupid decisions.

He doesnt really remember how it started, or why he'd dared to leave the carriage at the first sounds of an attack against his fathers wishes, but the creature he encounters is nothing he has ever heard of, never seen, never expected to see in broad daylight.

Its massive wooden body is haggard and willowed, wailing with grief. Despite their knights trying their best to fend it off or at least maneuver it away from the royals, the creature is persistant, seemingly searching past its assailants for something else.

And when it's gaze meets Janus's, he freezes. Because he feels it. Feels the aura of the gaze. Its wailing is deafened by the invading voice suddenly inside Janus's head.

"I see it is You who I seek,

Your sorrow is a beacon, your splintering heart a tragedy, yet the cause of your grief is your own! Your soul is tainted with a loneliness of your own design, and yet you wallow still, with no intention to change. Your lies poison the garden that grows within you, making bitterness prosper and understanding wilt in its wake.

If that is what you seek, then so be it. But know this now, your body will soon reap what you've sown."

And with that, the lumbering creature turns, still ignoring the shouts and attacks of the knights as it disappears into the forest with barely another wail.

The encounter leaves the traveling party shaken but otherwise unharmed, rushing the rest of the way to the neighboring kingdom without pause until they were safely out of the trees.

Janus, thinking over the words that had rattled through in his head, choses to say nothing about the experience. A cryptic warning at best, hes sure, and sees no reason to raise alarm for a few intrusive words.

What Janus doesnt know is that creature is a creature of grief, born from the worlds worst heartbroken souls and drawn to other beings' sorrow like a moth to a flame. What Janus doesnt know is that this creature's presence alone is rare, unheard of even when war or plague or loss ect. is not directly involved.

What Janus doesnt know is that this creature saw Janus's heartbreak and became angered by its self-inflicted presence in the young royal and the ensuing bitter rot beginning to poison his soul for good.

What Janus doesnt know is that this creature has bestown an ancient curse known as 'hanahaki' upon him in its anger.

A slow-acting curse that feeds on a broken heart's woe from the moment it is cast, working to slowly entrap the cursed being's body's limbs and neck in vines and filling their lungs with flowers.

There are only two known ways to break this ancient curse.

If the cursed being can heal their broken heart, then the curse will receed and fade away.

If the cursed being cannot heal their broken heart, their lungs will fill with flowers as the vines slowly tighten around their chest. And eventually, they will die.

The event doesnt quite escape Janus by the time he notices something isnt quite right, but its become distant enough in his mind that it doesnt immediately jump out at him as directly connected.

The simple kingdom meeting had gone otherwise normally, even as Janus could hear snippets of gossip at all ends about the kind of creature theyd encountered.

And of course, Virgil had been there with his father, King Patton. The old man seemed desprate to fret over Janus and his father, but he'd long since lost that permitted closeness since Janus and Virgil's fallout. Janus would be lying if he told you he hadnt been trying to avoid the kind king's sad eyes all day.

Janus unfortunately found himself lying a lot more these days, though.

Virgil had been trying to past his defenses again today, too. Snipping little bits of snark he knew would make Janus laugh or frown at, really anything to pry at the solid barrier that he'd figured out Janus had been putting up. Anything to break through and catch another glimpse of the Janus he used to know, anything to even just give him a chance to ask "why?"

Now that Janus knew what Virgil was doing, he wasn't successful. Didnt mean he couldnt still try, if only for the sake of annoying Janus for entertainment. Even if it ended in a particularly petty spat that ended up cutting way too close to home on both sides.

"Like fucking hell Janus, you make me wonder why we were ever friends!" (What happened to you? What happened to us?)

"Well maybe we shouldn't have been! I'm sure we all would have been happier!" (Its better this way, it has to be.)

"Maybe we would! I dont know why I ever thought I liked you. I should have just given up when they told me to, at least then hating you wouldnt have taken so long!" (I dont mean it, i dont hate you, i hate this, that this is what we've become. I cant take it anymore. I just wanted to know what i did wrong.)

"I'm glad we can finally agree on something, then!" (This is what i wanted, so why does it hurt so much?)

It had left his wounds freshly reopened, and gave the curse the perfect chance to strike. By the time they'd arrived back home, the curse had begun working in overdrive.

He'd only been coughing a little.

He'd begun to blame it on spring time allergies, but the stupid cough became persistent. Within a week, the Royal Doctor had looked Janus over, and told him he'd probably caught a cold and that they'd have to keep an eye on him if he got any worse.

And then, well.

Then one night out came the first few petals, before a whole flower followed. And for a few moments Janus stared at the delicate bulb of darkness in his lap, stunned.

Thats when the words of the creature clicked in his mind, gently gazing at a bloodflecked petal in his palm.

'But know this now, your body will soon reap what you've sown.'

Following suit with plucking up the flower in his lap, he wasn't surprised to have piece together this next omen; a Black rose- a symbol of death.

Janus couldnt really deny it now, he probably deserved this.

But that didn't mean he couldnt try to hide it.

It was always easier to breathe after a flower finally ejected itself from his lungs, and then for three days he was mostly fine before the next inevitably forced its way out.

Surprisingly, he kept the lie going for about two whole months without incident.

And then he doubled over infront of his father during a particularly horrible fit, and unwillingly coughed up two whole roses before he could stop or calm it. And well, all hell broke loose after that.

Janus pretty quickly stopped caring though, as the curse seemed to get worse, and began to become a constant, painful reminder that rose bushes had thorns. And that Janus would not be spared from them inside or out, lucky him.

It took another three days for the vines to appear, almost overnight. Small thin little things that started at his wrists and ankles, and wrapped up and around his arms and legs, finally meeting and weaving tightly around his chest. Within 48 hours the vines had grown strong and begun to thorn, and walking became impossible without drawing blood.

Finally, the curse began to slow. Yet, Janus wasnt too sure he could count himself thankful for it.

Bedridden and miserable, Janus wanted to laugh at his miserable self-inflicted state. And cry. And scream. Too bad his lungs were having none of it, seeing as he could barely talk without setting off into another wheezing, blood flecked coughing fit.

When the Royal Mage had figured out just what Janus was cursed with, it was like setting a fog upon the castle. There was nothing to be done, nothing that could be done without agitating the curse further.

His father had even sat next to him, looking more serious and wrecked than he'd ever seen his carefree king of a father be, and listened to him plead for Janus to talk to him. Give them something to work off of, anything!

Janus knew why he chose to keep his mouth shut, feeling deserving of the punishment of his own making. Instead he closed his eyes, and silently wept.

Word of prince Janus's sudden ailment got around the kingdoms quick, as was the reason for Remy's abenses at ally kingdom leader gatherings.

When word got to Virgil, its said that he stumbled out of his chair and down to the kingdom stables, calling for a hasty visit that King Patton knew the reason for all too well.

For all the bite back he'd done since their fallout, Virgil still cared about Janus. Had loved him even, even if those feelings were now locked away deep inside to keep them safe from the carnage of their falling out.

If Janus was dying, Virgil couldn't let the last words he said to him be 'I hate you!'

Because above all else, it wasn't true. And Virgil was tired of fighting it. Tired of fighting Janus when he just wanted to hold him close and never let go.

The state that Janus is in when Virgil comes barreling through the doors of the other's sickroom is shocking enough to make him freeze in place.

Black petals and roses litter the large bed, the royal resting in it looking so small and painfully weak. Pale and wheezing, the cursed prince stares at him with surprised and terrified multicolored eyes.

The fact that the emotions dont dissipate behind a wall of indifference the longer Virgil remains in the room says volumes about whatever storm is brewing inside Janus's head. Hell, when Virgil comes to sit down next to him and takes his hand with a gentle squeeze, he even gets a hesitant squeeze back.

And at that point Virgil knows that if Janus is going to die, he cant just admit he doesnt hate him. He.. He has to get it out in the open, all of it. And given that Janus cant even properly speak, its the perfect opportunity to lay it all out.

Everything.

And its only when he finally lays it all out, even down to "I still love you, have loved you, for so fucking long. I was gonna figure it out, how we could be together, yknow? Even after you started pushing me away, even when i couldnt figure out why cause i could tell that you didnt want to, i was gonna figure it out. I.. I dropped everything the moment i heard cause, cause I care about you so fucking much it hurts, even when i know I shouldve given up I just. Couldnt. Because I knew something was off. I always knew, Jan. You'd never actually lied to me before, and now i dont even care about that! I just. I wanted you back. And I'm so terrified of losing you before I got to chance to try.."

And Janus is weeping again covering his mouth in a way that cant be comfortable to muffle his cries before giving up and reaching out for Virgil with both arms.

And Virgil doesnt miss a beat carefully wrapping his arms around Janus as the other clings tightly to his tunic and sobs.

Virgil can make out portions of apologies through the hiccups, carefully waiting out the storm as Janus breaks down in his arms for the first time in years. And like Virgil always does, he holds and protects him the whole time, carefully rubbing his back in soothing motions and tucking Jan's head into the crook of his neck.

It's only when Janus finally exhausts himself that the tears stop, but he doesnt let go of Virgil even a little bit, so Virgil carefully reclines them both, having manuved himself onto the bed to better hold Janus.

Theres an uneasy peace between them, which niether want to break after years of tension, but Janus knows he needs to say something.

"You are going to be so mad at me.." He says, his voice rasping but no longer quite wheezing.

"Mmm, you dont know that. And- and.. Even if i did get mad, I don't think it will stop me from loving you. After all we've been through, I dont know if theres anything that can. So.. Try me."

"When.. When I began to draw away, I'd had a revelation. And like the idiot that i was, I figured it was better, safer for me to pull away. And when you stubbornly clung on like a spider to a web no matter what I tried, I panicked, and kept used the first thing that had worked.

"I.. I cant say that it was purely romantic love, at the time. But it was infatuation, a romantic crush that rivaled over all my platonic feelings for you and made it hard not to reach out and say something. And I was convinced if i said anything that would be the beginning of the end of it, that you were push me away for being weird or hate me. I was afraid of your rejection breaking my heart, and losing you as a friend as a result.

"Instead, i broke my own heart by pushing you away. How fitting, hm?"

Virgil had gone still and quiet, but Janus kept his head tucked into Virgils shoulder for fear of losing his nerve.

"What im trying to say, is that I.. I love you too. And im sorry I was such an ass about it."

A good sign was Virgil slowly resuming rubbing Janus's back as he processed the other's words. Janus marveled in the partial amount of breathing room the curse had released its hold on. After a few long moments, Virgil finally spoke up:

"..You were right about one thing" Virgil added softly, before backing up just enough to scoot down to be closer to eyelevel with Janus, " I am mad. But really only about the fact that i could've already been with you the past 6 years. But you can bet I'm not leaving you alone now. I want to spend everyday you have left by your side."

And Janus could feel his eyes prick with tears, happy ones, for once.

"The mages say this curse is fueled by a broken heart, but eventually dies out if the broken heart heals.. So you may be at my side for quite a while, you know?" Janus says snarking oh so gently, his eyes betraying his nervousness.

"Bold of you to assume im not ready to spend the rest of our entire lives together, side by side." Virgil replies seriously before grinning, tucking Janus closer and tilting his head up, basking in the bright red blush across Jan's cheeks.

"Speaking of.. Can I..?" Virgil begins, glancing at Jan's lips.

"Please, kiss me." Janus finishes, meeting Virgil in the middle to close the gap between them.

And if Janus's lungs feel clearer than they have in months? Well, for now he plans on using it to continue kissing his love, obviously.

They had tons still to work through and talk about in honesty, but that could wait for another day. For now, these lovers plan on peacfully basking in each others presence for the first time in 6 years, finally reunited and safe.

[babysizedfics]

okay so this might be a weird question but does the *show* Sanders Sides exist within the Little/Big universe? it's not at all mentioned in the fics, I think. Like they never reference making videos, or like thomas at all? I'm just curious, and if it does, will it ever tie into the plot somehow?- 🐇

interesting question bunny anon!! not weird at all

i did briefly mention in peekaboo when virgil was panicking and catastrophising he said:

'... and Roman would be depressed and then we might not be able to make videos for months because he’s so distraught and what if it was all my fault? ...'

So yes I would say sanders sides does exist in this universe, however not the one we know! just because i take creative liberties in the timeline and when the dark sides are introduced and how, so its still sanders sides and its the same show, but the timeline is a bit mixed and my characters are slightly different to the canon ones

They don't talk about Thomas much mainly because that's just me wanting to avoid rpf (yeah i know its character!thimas but i still feel iffy) - but narratively you could explain it because on the in character blog I had Logan metion that they try to keep their personal lives separate from their work (ie as thomas' sides) and the fic widey explores their personal lives so there isnt reason to delve into their work much.

There is some overlap, thomas does know about the boys being little in the universe and logan and patton inform him of certain things if they are significant enough to seep through and impact thomas' mental health - i have one instance planned - but the boys being little doesnt translate to thomas being one too, again just because i dont want to write that

there is a plot point in romans arc that involves thomas knowing about something but it doesnt involve videos. i haven't actually considered it before may i will put a pin in it and see if the idea works later!

[sablesides-writing-corner]

Hi, I Have Another Request For You. Can You Do “I thought I’d never get to see you again.” With A Prinxiety Tangled AU? (Something About That Line Gives Me Big Tangled Vibes,,)

Sorry this took so long! Tumblr was lagging on my inbox :T

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Virgil didnt exactly have the best memory, everything from his child hood was basically a hazy blur. All his memories seemed to be a mush of images and information given to him by his father. The only thing he seemed capable of holding onto was the name Roman, but he didnt know who that was. His father had always told him that it wasnt important, that he should forget he ever heard the name to begin with. But his father was always keeping secrets, there was always something off about his smile. But Virgil supposed this was all in his head. He was safe in the tower, his father kept him fed and warm, why would he need to mistrust him.

Virgil glanced over at the small spot grey cat hiding by the fireplace. He'd found the cat trapped in his abnormally long hair one day and decided to keep him. Of course his father couldnt know about the poor thing or it would be straight out the window with it. He named the cat Patton, it seemed fitting for some odd reason. "Are you going to come out or are you still asleep?" he asked, odd sort of thing to do, talk to a cat like it was a person. But Patton got up either way, meowed, and proceeded to bound over to the middle of the room, where he promptly laid back down across Virgil's feet. Virgil sighed and picked him up, cradling him as though he were a small child and not some fluffy animal that liked to raid his closet and eat his clothes for fun.

"I'm working on something new, do you want to see it?" he asked the cat. Patton purred and rolled over in his arms. Virgil took that as a yes and placed him up on a pedestal, climbing up himself and pulling aside the curtains. Behind was a stunning mural of a sunset, with Virgil and an unknown person sitting underneath at what looked like a picnic.

Patton meowed and reached a paw out towards the mural. "Dont touch it- the paint isnt dry yet," said Virgil, covering the mural again and jumping down from the pedestal.

He felt a jolt of fear when he heard a voice from outside the tower call "Anxiety, Anxiety! Let down your hair!" he rushed over to the window, not daring lean his head over the edge until he was sure Patton had hidden himself safely once more. Only then did he hoist his vibrant purple locks over the side of the tower. He tried not wince as his father climbed back into the tower. His father, who insisted on being known only by that title, was a rather gaunt man dressed primarily in red and black. It seemed to be the only thing that didnt blind him, he absolutely despised Virgil's paintings, always claiming they were to bright and obnoxious.

"How was your journey father? Did you find anything new?" Virgil asked in his calmest voice. He'd hoped to go outside for his birthday, to see the world as it really was- outside of the dusty old tower he'd grown up in, and he feared the only way to do that was to convince his father he was old enough for it.

"Only dust and ashes my flower, makes a man feel his age doesnt it?" he said, taking a seat on an ornate chai. "Could you sing something for me ?" he said, grabbing a brush from the nearby counter. Virgil was used to this routine, it was an every day sort of thing for him. So he sat down and muttered the same incantation as always. Incantation, that's what he'd always called it- it never sounded like songs to him.

"Father- I wanted to ask you something, about my birthday," the words escaped Virgil's lips in a hoarse whisper.

His father raised an eyebrow "What is it?" he said, his tone icy.

"I-I was wondering- if we could go into the kingdom for my birthday- to see what its like out there," Virgil said, a little louder this time. He regretted mentioning it as soon as he saw the snarl upon his father's face.

"What could you possibly want from the village that you dont have here? Have I not done everything I can for you?" he said, there was hurt in his eyes, the wave of guilt Virgil felt might have been strong enough to kill a man. "I've tried my best you know, but you children are just so unpredictable sometimes, forgive me if I'm not perfect," he said.

"But father I-" Virgil's words were cut off by his father pressing a finger to his lips.

"You are not leaving the tower, that is final." he said, swapping from sorrowful to cold in what seemed like milliseconds. Virgil felt like he might cry, he'd been working up that courage for so long, and now it was all just- gone. His father seemed to notice this "Oh, and now I'm the bad guy, aren't I," he said. Virgil looked down at the floor, blinking back the tears forming in his eyes. "Is there anything reasonable you could think of?" said his father, another tone shift, he always did this- always changed himself to make others act how he wanted.

"I guess I wouldnt mind more paints, I've been running low. . ." said virgil. His father planted a quick kiss on his forehead, but it didnt feel genuine, it never did.

"Very well, it will be a few days before I can come back though, I love you," he said.

"I love you more,"

"I love you most," said his father as he lowered him back out the window. The relief Virgil felt watching him disappear into the woods was overwhelming.

That relief lasted a mere hour or two. For as Virgil had been brushing his hair, or more accurately keeping Patton's claws out of his hair. He heard boots land on the stones. He peered over the rafters and immeadietly felt his face turn red. The man on the floor below might have been the most stunning human he'd ever seen, with dark Auburn hair and stunning ruby eyes, Virgil felt as if he might faint. That is until the man started speaking.

"Stupid horse- chased me all the way from the town to this miserable tower, how am I supposed to make a living if that beast keeps coming after me!" he said.

He's a criminal. . . thought Virgil fearfully. So he did the only thing he could think of in the situation, knock the man over the head with whatever was nearby.

He awoke later with a groan, and immeadietly became startled at the sight of his chains. "Is this. . . hair?-" he said quizzically.

"So, you're finally awake," Virgil said, surprisingly smug. The man looked up and his eyes went wide.

"Look I dont know who you are but-" he paused and looked around "- where is my satchel."

Virgil smiled "somewhere you'll never, ever, ever find it," he smirked.

The man looked around the room once more before stopping on a vase, "Its in that, isnt it." Virgil promptly knocked him out again.

"NOW its somewhere you'll never find it, and you'll get it back after you do something for me," said Virgil.

"I dont even know your name emo." said the man.

"And I dont know yours, but who's in who's hair right now?" said virgil.

"wait- this is YOUR hair?" said the man, he seemed oddly more comfortable now.

"Yes. And unless you take my offer you wont be getting out of it." Virgil responded.

"Alright, but can I at least get your name?" he said.

"You first,"

The man rolled his eyes, "Call me Rogue,"

"Virgil, now onto my demands," he said calmly. "I want you, to escort me into town for my birthday, I've heard of the shows and festivals they hold on that day and I want to see them,"

Rogue looked oddly stunned, "You've, never been into town before." he said.

"No, but you're going to take me,"

"What makes you think that?" Patton appeared out of the shadows and perched on Rogue's shoulders. He looked suspiciously at the cat as Patton subtlety flexed his claws. ". . . Right," he said, "I guess that's what,"

"So do you accept?" said Virgil. Rogue simply nodded. Virgil pulled the ties slightly to loosen them and they fell off easily. He jumped down from the pedestal he'd been standing on and raced to the window. "No time to waste then!" he said, excitedly flinging the hair over a hook. Rogue simply pulled out two knives and began scaling down the tower side.

Virgil stepped out onto the platform, the wind blowing in his face felt almost to good to be true.

"You coming my chemically imbalanced romance?" said Rogue, who had already reached the ground somehow. Virgil took a few steps closer to the edge, and scaled down the tower, holding Patton under one arm and to his chest so as not to hurt him.

Virgil's hair fell moments after he did with a thud.

"Quite a lot of hair you got there huh?" said Rogue, taking a closer look now that they were in better light. Virgil felt his face go red again.

"They'd barely even left the forest when Virgil started wanting to go back. Every twig snap and rustle of the leaves seemed to sound like his father might pop out to drag him back home again, but he was so close- he didnt want to give up yet.

"Are you alright? You seem unsettled," Rogue took Virgil's hand in his own and flashed him a grin that might have caused him to melt on the spot.

He shook his head "I'm perfectly fine- just nervous, this being my first time away from the tower and all," Viegil said. Rogue simply pulled the vibrant-haired man closer to himself and continued on through the woods, his free hand resting on the knife in his pocket. Oddly enough, this made Virgil feel safer. His father had always said men were nothing but trouble, yet Rogue seemed different, almost in a familiar way.

"Are you hungry? We can stop by a place I know and get something to eat," Rogue said, the devilish grin still across his face. Virgil nodded slightly, which prompted Rogue to part away from the path they'd been on for so long and head along yet another, Virgil could've sworn it hadnt been there before.

The place Rogue took him to didnt bode well for the mysterious path either, and the people inside still less. Especially from the moment they tried to drag Rogue off to the castle guards. Virgil was never good in stressful situations, so he did the only thing he could think of, panic. This proved an effective distraction, as it turned out, the British ogres that ran the place were mostly just theatre rejects, and all it seemed to take was a solo from Rogue to get them to let them go. Rogue and Virgil had only just started their celebrations when the sound of hooves caught up to them. Virgil turned just in time to see a brown and tan horse preparing to charge. He grabbed Rogue by the arm and booked it to the ledge of the mountains. He held his breath, counted, and jumped across the chasm. Everything seemed to slow to a halt before he and Rogue plummeted into the water, which promptly washed them into a cave.

"What are we supposed to do now!" said Rogue indignantly. Virgil was to busy examining the rock work to listen.

"Start pulling on the rocks- quickly," Rogue opened his mouth to argue before he noticed the water spilling into the cave. Virgil began singing frantically, and the cave was filled with violet light. Rogue's shocked face might have earned a laugh had the situation been less dire, and had the smell of blood not just reached his nostrils.

By the time they'd washed up on shore Virgil felt as if the world was spinning. Patton gently pawed at both he and Rogue's faces to make sure they were still alive.

"His hair glows- why does it do that??? People's hair doesnt just DO THAT????" Rogue said, jolting up.

"That's not the only thing it's good for, but we need to find somewhere to camp," Virgil said, getting up. Rogue stood up as well and sort of just stared at him in awe. Virgil's face flushed.

By the time they'd managed to set up camp, night had fallen. They were sitting calmly on a log when Virgil finally remembered Rogue's bleeding hand. "Give me your hand- I can fix it," he said, Rogue hesitated before reaching over to him. "Dont, scream." Virgil said, making direct eye contact before closing his eyes. The incantation felt different this time. When he sung for his father he always felt tired and drained, yet with Rogue it felt almost serene. Virgil opened his eyes to face Rogue, who's jaw was so far down it may as well have been on the floor.

"Im- going to go get firewood- and I'm taking the cat-" he said, getting up and walking out of the clearing. Patton followed him, the cat seemed happier than usual that night.

Which only made the next voice Virgil heard even more of a burden. "Well done, Anxiety, you've really out done yourself with this havent you?" his father stepped out from the shadows, a very familiar satchel draped across his arm.

Virgil froze "f-father I-" his father lifted a finger to his lips to shut him up yet again.

"Come along Virgil, we best be getting back now that you've had your fun," his father tried to grab onto his arm. But something in Virgil didnt want to leave that spot. He dug his heels into the ground, it burned, he'd forgotten he never wore shoes.

"No." he said simply. He'd never forget the look on his father's face at that notion.

"No? Is that what you're telling me? I'm simply trying to protect you, and you tell me you'd rather die out here with a criminal than be safe at home with me?" he said. Virgil flinched as his father tossed the satchel at him. "Give him this, see if he cares what happens to you then," he said, growling.

"I will- I'll prove you wrong father." Virgil said, fighting back tears as he watched his father disappear back into the woods. Rogue stepped out from trees and seemed immeadietly aware of Virgil's discomfort.

"What is it? What's wrong?" he said.

"Its nothing, Rogue, I'm just tired," said Virgil. "But, I do have something I need to show you," he said. He felt like he'd regret this later, but he showed him the satchel. Rogue's eyes lit up as he took the bag in his arms and put it back on.

"Thank you, so much, it probably took you a lot to trust me with this didnt it?" Rogue said. He looked as though he were pondering something. "Perhaps I should trust you with something new as well. . ." he said, looking at Virgil quizzically. Virgil's eyes went wide and he stood completely still, while trying to maintain a calming presence.

"What is it?" he asked.

"My real name isnt Rogue, that's just a pseudonym, my real name is Roman Prince" he said. Virgil felt as if his world had shrunk several sizes. Roman?. . . But I would have remembered him being a criminal- I'm sure of it he stared at him in awe.

"I-I recognize that name- from when I was little.

Roman stared at him, and simply grinned wider, "I was wondering how long it would take you to figure it out moonbeam, I thought I'd never see you again after all that," Roman moved Virgil's hair out of his face, which was beet red suddenly. "We'll talk more about it in the morning ok? You look exhausted," said Roman. Virgil couldnt seem to find an arguement, so he simply allowed himself to be lulled into sleep.

It didnt last long, or so he thought. The rain was much to annoying to sleep through. Upon waking up he recognized that it was in fact not raining, but there was a horse looming over he and Roman as they tried to sleep.

"What the-"

"Hey uh- Virge- A little help please-" that's when Virgil turned to see Roman, stuck to a tree via some kind of knife. Virgil sighed and glared at the horse.

"Look. . ." he searched the horse for a name tag and found an insignia on its breastplate titled 'Logan' ". . . Logan, it's my birthday, and Im really excited to be getting to the town tonight, especially since I just reunited with someone I havent seen in decades, so if you could fight him later- please- that would be great," said Virgil, his voice clearly shaking. Patton draped himself across his neck and gave a quizzical look at the horse. Logan contemplated this offer for a minute or two before resigning and grabbing the knife out with his teeth. Roman fell to the floor and dusted himself off with an indignant huff.

The town was beyond Virgil's expectations, everything was so bright and happy, much better than what he was used to. But he couldnt seem to focus due to the pain in his skull.

"Virgil, I think we need to do something about all this hair," Roman said from behind him. He turned to see Roman holding up a long coil of the purple locks, and stifled a snicker. They spotted a group of girls playing jump rope on the streets, and Roman called them over. The braid worked surprisingly well, well enough in fact that he and Roman were able to dance and race through the streets without a single issue.

The issue would later come on the boat ride they'd expected to be romantic for their reunion. It was cut short by Roman's excusing himself to a seemingly deserted island, which Virgil followed him to. Only to bed left at the mercy of two men he didnt recognize, who told him what he had hoped were lies about Roman's character, until they had personally dragged him to the shoreline to watch Roman sailing away into the distance. Virgil's insides writhed. He felt like he'd just been gutted like a fish.

"And you know what he promised us?" said the first of the two men.

"A man with magic hair, who'd keep us alive and healthy as long as we want," said the second. Virgil felt a cloth cover his mouth, he ran, he ran as fast as he could until his hair got caught in a tree and his legs gave out. Then he panicked and cried, he heard a distant thud and felt a familiar hand on his shoulder.

"Father. . ." was all he could mutter. His father gathered him up in his arms, he felt even smaller than usual, like he was a child again.

He woke up seemingly hours later, back in the castle, the braid in his hair completely gone, the flowers from it burning in the fireplace. Virgil glared at the flag Roman had gotten him. It was a flag of lies, from a kingdom of lies. Or so he thought, upon closer inspection of the stars and wings on the flag, he began to notice something. He stared up at the ceiling, squinting at it, pondering it. Until stars began to swim in his vision, and the sound of birds wings filled his ears. He gasped and rushed out of his room.

"What's wrong Anxiety? Are you alright?" said his father, with that fake expression of kindness on his face.

"I'm the lost prince" Virgil muttered. He flinched as his father let a plate slam into the table.

"The mumbling, Virgil, what did I tell you about *mumbling?" he growled.

"I'm the lost prince- those murals, the flag, the stories- that's all me- you're not my real father," Virgil said again, louder. His father glared at him.

"Virgil, this is nonsense!" he said, advancing toward him. Virgil backed up, but he didnt have much room to flee. Soon enough his father caught up with him, and his vision went entirely black.

He awoke to the sound of a groan, and his eyes opened to a dark tower and Roman falling to the floor in front of him, his chest oozed with blood.

"ROMAN!" he tried to scream, but it was muffled. He shook the gag off his mouth and looked around for his father. He felt himself being dragged toward the trap door his father had told him was to remain locked, and he tried to fight against it. "Let me heal him!" he yelled.

"Nonsense! You dont need to heal a theif! he means nothing!" said his father.

"If you let me- I'll go with you, no arguments, no fights, no nothing," he said. Roman tried to shout in protest, but he sputtered with blood.

"Very well, you can heal him. But he cant follow us." said his father, walking over to Roman again. He tied his arms around a nearby post and allowed Virgil to crawl closer to him.

"Virgil. . . please don't. . ." said Roman, his voice was barely above a whisper. Virgil didnt listen, he brought his hair over to Roman's wounds. Roman cupped his face in his hands, and just as he had begun to sing. . . his hair was made lighter. He gasped in shock, the hair on the floor and on Roman's body rapidly began to turn black. Virgil's father swore and began rapidly gathering up the hair, looking for some sign of the vibrant purple it once was. His features had rapidly shifted from young to old in what seemed like milliseconds. Patton grabbed onto some lose hair by the window, and Virgil's father disappeared over the edge. Virgil began panicking, he latched himself onto Roman and tried desperately to get the incantation to work. He buried his head into Roman' chest and began screaming it until his voice went hoarse. But it was no use, he felt Roman's chest cease its heaving, and he began to sob. Patton buried himself under Virgil's arm.

Suddenly, the room began to glow with purple light, Virgil looked up to see where the source of the light was coming from, and noticed odd flower-shaped images emitting from Roman's chest. He gasped and retreated. He watched as Roman stirred, and slowly began to wake up.

"R-Roman?. . ." he said, crawling back over to the man. Roman smiled and took Virgil under his arm.

"You didnt think I'd let you face that old hag alone did you moonbeam?" he laughed. Roman stood and picked Virgil up off his feet. It seemed like he wasnt even bothered by the previous events. Patton clawed his way up to Virgil's shoulders, and the three descended back down the tower. Logan was awaiting them outside, he seemed worried.

After hours of travel back to the kingdom, the endpoint seemed to cause Virgil's stomach to turn, he was finally going to meet his parents.

"Just breath, Virgil, it'll all be ok," Roman said. The two stared out over the kingdom from the palace balcony.

Virgil heard footsteps, and then felt the embrace of someone he didnt recognize.

"I missed you so much. . . I'm sorry I ever let you out of my sight. . ." said the man hugging him. He had round glasses, and his light brown hair was streaked in cotton candy pink. Virgil looked to the man behind him, a man with black sunglasses, and dark brown hair that covered nearly all of his face. These were his parents, these were the real people who should have raised him, and he didnt even know their names.

"Its me, it's your dad, Emile, I wish you could remember me, I'm so sorry you cant. . ." said the pink-haired man.

"Em, it's not your fault," said the other man, walking over to join in the hug. He looked over at Roman and beckoned him into the hug.

Virgil felt as though nothing in the world could change this moment, and he was glad to find that it was true, he never wanted to deal with any of that again. He was safe, and happy, and he would stay that way from that point on.

[silvers-au-stuff]

Headcanons for the soulmates!

Even though you have not seen much of the bf trio yet you’ll get to know them in uppcoming chapters so have these 1 am headcanons :D and yes alot of these were inspired after reading some of @illogicallyinclined s disaster trio stuff and alot lf their headcanons

-

Patton:

•he has high functioning autism, even though you cant really see it the two things that affect him the most these days are: food textures and due to this his food palette isnt the biggest, much to a certain soulmates dismay.

The other is that he really have a problem with touch, what i mean with that is that some auti ppl have some problems with others touching them unless given permission to (including sudden hugs, handshakes etc) though he is much more okay with it coming from his soulmates.

• he like many autistic ppl have special interests his main one being baking, and its what he’s going to school for.

• he works at a coffee shop to help with food and rent for his, roman and virgils shared apartment.

• despite wearing glasses he rarely cleans them unless neccessary.

• both he and virgil enjoys stealing their tallest bf’s hoodies.

• he found roman in their sophomore year of highschool after roman and Remus had a bad argument, had a chat, helping roman calm down and didnt take notice till they had to leave that took notice to their arms.

• he always carries extra of virgils anxiety meds with him just incase.

Virgil:

• mental health problems runs in his family, thankfully though nothing too severe has happened because of it.

• virgil was officially diagnosed with anxiety at the last year of junior high after a couple of years of bullying.

• he works part time at a local library.

• he and decans were friends as kids but lost contact after decans family moved, got in contact after they met again through Remus and roman.

• his family is full of litteral sunshines, many often call him the odd one out but they love him regardless of his fashion choices.

• he met roman first out of the soulmates, virgil had mentioned going to a local con to see some artists he liked and roman being impatient followed suit and SOMEHOW found him.

• he Damn nearly fainted uppon meeting him the first time.

Roman:

• he has alot of questions regarding as to Why dark blue barely talks any more.

• he and Remus did not get along though out most of middle school out through the middle of highschool, Remus got into an accident and roman PANICED he was so scared he would lose his brother no matter how much they faught.

• they’re pretty okay now though and can actually hang out together.

• the brothers Watch Disney movies together and sings duets to ALOT of the songs.

• roman is usually the one sleeping in the middle of their shared king sized bed and soaks up all the attention he gets from his soulmates

• he has become pattons taste tester when ever patton decides he wants to try something new.

• he is always on the outlook for their fourth. It feels empthy without them, so he always keeps an eye out for the things he knows they like.

• he is not so surprisingly quite the good chef.

Logan:

• despite telling himself that he needs to distance himself from his soulmates he still frequents the café patton works at and visits virgils library quite often.

• as much as he enjoys coffe he Also has quite the Tea collection

• logan is used to listening dee ramble and vent to him to the point of it making him feel relaxed

• he has actually bumped into all of his soulmates more then once while knowing about them but keeping to his promise he didnt say anything.

• he has an older (step) sister Who adores him and the two of them are quite close.

• when he gets to know about a hobby or anything else his soulmates like he Will dive in head first to learn about it, so much for distance eh?

• he, Remus and decans as well as some others play dnd a few times a month.

Decans:

• He and logan met in the 4th grade after decans was put next to logan for talking too much

• the boy was met with some bullying bc of his hetrocromia but it was quickly out to an end with the help of logan.

• his and logans friendship really hit it of at the end lf middle school/begining of highschool.

• dee was really sad when his family moved city and he lost contact with virgil, but in return was very exited to meet him again after so long.

• he and Remus met at a concert after having arranged to meet, and it’s still seen as his favorite ever date.

• he quite frequently helps logan with selfcare and logan in return helps him study.

• one year for logans birth day he got his favorite nerd a lamp that would show the night sky, accurate and all, logan still has that lamp and its very precious to him.

Remus:

• his so called accident wasnt really an accident, it was staged to look like one by some people he had really pissed of.

• he was honestly so so happy when he and roman began rekindeling their relationship again after having felt so lonely for so long without his brother.

• he knows that his brother and his best friend are soulmates, however he knows logan isnt ready for that stuff yet so he respects it.

• much like how logan feels relaxed listening to dee talk, Remus really enjoys asking bizzare questions and letting logan explain things to him.

• when playing dnd he surprisingly isnt a murderhobo, and he actually really enjoys playing warlock or rogue.

• his food habits are cursed, putting things that shouldnt Go together with eachother, making his brother sometimes wonder how they’re related.

• he is studying to work within the forensic, and honestly i doubt anyone is surprised, though the thought of dr Remus might be a little scary to some.

[pippa-frost]

Bird Skein: Red on Carpet

Part 1: Red on carpet.

Part 2: (not done yet)

I think i’ve never put TW, i’ll fix that later on! For now:

TW: Blood, Injury (described, but the way it happens isnt’s mentioned)

If you think of any others please let me know!

Tags! I know i’m missing a lot of people! I actually just copied the tags from the last fic i tagged, i’m not even sure if they’ll all get to you, but don’t worry, proper tags are coming, just not yet! To all those who have asked me i will be updating these so you can be tagged, but i said in my previous post, that won’t be until i’m fully back on track with writing and posting!

  @eriysa-p @fluffbirdx @yoshimicherryopal @gayhannaford @caristars @extremepenguin10 @skylions-den @demonickittykat @the-diaries-of-a-nerd @cochroachkappa-blog @what-even-is-thiss @deafinatelyfangirling @fugitive-angel @corystssides @tiny-mudkip @parsnipit @romananalogicality @analogicalhell @starlight-sanders @dan-yuna @wingedchickadee @ana-logical @diplomatic-arsonist @killerfangirl3 @princeyandanxiety @pattonscardigan @pfftwhatnoimhuman @agentflash18 @ec-sanderssides @frustratedwaffle @inalandofmythandtimeofmagic @thagrinbery @prplzorua @ohmehgawdnotagain @analogically-prinxiety @beautiful-crimson @prinxietys @prinxiety-fandom @prinxiety-logicality-ss @starrykid @organizeddiscord @ts-sideblog @sanderships @toxicsanders

“Do you know how birds fly in a ‘v’ formation…?”

-- 

Patton is the first to wake up. He sits up, dizzy and confused, before glancing around. Everything is still and silent, and even in his not-really-awake-yet state of mind, a sense of wrong settles over his shoulders. He looks down to where his hands hold him in place. He had been lying on his belly, but there’re no blankets or pillows around. The wrong steadily grows, now heavy inside his chest. He looks up again, only this time with a sense of urgency. He’s in the living room only it looks kind of bleak, the familiar colors somehow dulled. The TV is off and lying in front of it is-

“Thomas, run!!”

It all comes back to him like a bucketful of freezing water.

Night.

Movies.

Thomas.

Oh god, Thomas.

His head turns around with enough force to cause whiplash, the image of Roman falling down fresh in his mind. Just as he remembers, Roman is lying head down on the floor a few feet behind him, unconscious still. Logan, behind him as well but closer than Roman, is lying on his right side and beginning to stir, which lifts a little of the worry churning inside him. Logan would know what to do. Logan always knew what to do.

So that left-

“Virgil” he mutters as he turns his head back around and sees him in front of the TV. His kiddo is lying on his belly, quiet and unmoving. And he has to go check on him before he wakes up frantic and scared and he can hear Logan moving behind him and he has to check on him as well, but they also have to check on Roman, and Thomas, they gotta find out what happened, is he okay? Where are they? Did someone fou-

“…Patton?” he distantly hears Logan’s hesitant call and realizes he’s stood up. It doesn’t really matter.

Because there’s red.

There’s red on the carpet beneath and next to the anxious side, some sort of puddle under him. Except that doesn’t make sense. There shouldn’t be any red. They don’t have any strawberry juice left, and they were all drinking hot chocolate during the movie, and those stains are already fading.

Without taking his eyes away from their kiddo and not really aware of his own movements, he rushes forward in an awkward dance of stumbling and falling and crawling until he makes it to Virgil’s side, kneeling right over the red.  

“Virgil?” he asks with fear, hoping more than anything that he’ll receive an answer.

He doesn’t.

The latter is lying on his stomach, head to his right facing Patton, his right arm almost hiding his face.

Patton can’t help it. He looks down, and with a trembling hand places his fingers on the stain. A broken sigh escapes his mouth along with a whine. What he’s touching isn’t wet, but it still taints his fingers, and the metallic smell is impossible to ignore up close.

It’s blood.

It’s a lot of blood. A whole puddle of it.

There shouldn’t, in any way, be blood on the floor. Let alone a puddle of it. And he wants to believe that’s not what it is, it’s just juice, just some strawberry juice, that’s all this is, but he knows it isn’t and-

“Logan!” he shrieks, cause Logan will know, Logan must know, and he’ll come over here and explain to him why there’s red on the carpet, and it’ll make perfect sense, and Virgil will be A-Okay, and they’ll find out what happened and Thomas will be fi-

“Patton!” the other is kneeling next to him, a hand placed on his shoulder, eyebrows furrowed.

“Logan” his voice breaks and maybe he’s crying, he can’t really tell “L-Logan there’s- there’s” and his eyes moving downwards is all the other needs. Logan follows his line of sight, just about to interrupt Patton, and his mouth snaps shut, eyes wide open.  

The logical side doesn’t say a word as he hurriedly starts turning Virgil over. Patton goes to help only to stop at Roman’s gasp. He’s now sitting up and glancing at them with terrified eyes.

“Oh my god!! Thomas!!” he yells before looking at them “What happened?!”

The oldest doesn’t really know how to explain nor does he have the voice to do so, letting his eyes show the other just like they did Logan. Roman hurries over to them just as the logical side gets their youngest on his back and starts pulling up the red soaked end of his t-shirt.

All three of them choke a gasp at the same time.  

“Oh my god!!” the recently awoken side cries from Virgil’s other side “That’s blood!!”

“Yes, Roman-”

“What the hell happened?!”

“Roma-”

“Why the hell is he bleeding?!”

“Thomas was bleeding too!” Logan manages to say before being interrupted again.

“So?! You know he shouldn’t be bleeding! We aren’t bleeding!!” he motions to them and while Patton knows that’s true, he can’t help but glance at his middle to make sure. And no, no blood stains there.

“We know, Roman!!” Logan screams, making Roman stop his tirade and Patton jump next to him. He doesn’t think he’s ever heard Logan this… frustrated doesn’t even come close “And that’s all we’ll know until we gather more information, starting by locating the injury, which isn’t possible with all the blood covering his abdomen, so would you please shut up, and go get some towels and water!!”

Roman’s face is unreadable, a combination of maybe-indignation, maybe-surprise and maybe-anger, his mouth tightly shut. But after a couple of seconds he stands up and hurries to do as told.

“Patton” Logan turns his attention to him now and he can’t help but flinch “Go get the first aid kit, and bring some warm water”

Patton doesn’t need to be told twice. He does both tasks as fast as possible and soon he’s back on his spot. Roman is already there and Logan is wiping his hands with a little towel, before taking a different one and dipping it in the warm water he’s just brought.

With held breaths Roman and Patton- who has now gripped Virgil’s hoodie-, watch Logan slowly and carefully clean away the blood, leaving red streaks along the way and brownish spots on the white towel. Patton is sure he’ll have to rush away to puke any moment now.

As Logan nears the center of it all, the oldest keeps a close eye on the injured side, ready to act at any signs of pain. It turns out to be unnecessary, tho. The logical facet makes it to the source of the blood and Virgil doesn’t so much as meep. He can’t believe it, and he looks at the others to convey how wrong this is, only Logan is focused on Virgil, his eyes wide, and Roman is too busy gaping downwards. Patton follows their gaze and sees the wound.

As they knew it would, it’s placed on the youngest’s right side. Only it isn’t just a mark or some line like their injuries usually are. No, instead there’s an actual fresh looking cut pulled closed by black stitches.

Patton’s mind goes blank. He can’t process what he’s seeing. There’s a knot inside his throat and pressure on his eyes, he feels so cold, yet he can’t really move to try and fix any of it.

Out of the corner of his eye he sees something move and he’s barely able to move his head enough to get a clear view of Roman standing up, or giving it his best with wobbling legs; his hands are shaking at his sides and he looks like he’s seen a ghost.

“…Logan?” the oldest finally, alas shakily, finds his voice. The latter is staring at the injury with a shocked expression, seemingly frozen.

“W-we” the Side manages after a few gulps “We need to…” and the other two are waiting anxiously- Patton feels tears fall at the thought- for his words until he is suddenly back to his problem-solving-chop-chop-everyone self, facing them to give them instructions.

“Roman, get me a pair of scissors and a spare t-shirt for Virgil. Patton” he starts, Roman already gone “go get blankets, we’ll lay him on the couch to keep an eye on him”

Patton does so, and soon enough Logan is cutting Virgil’s shirt open with Roman’s help.

“Patton, I need you to try and see if you can get him to respond” he tells him and it’s like snapping out of a trance. Patton hadn’t even thought of that. He hadn’t even bothered to look at his kiddo, to try to wake him up, to make sure he was okay, too focused on the red, more worried about a color than his kiddo. So he looks at Virgil, really looks at him, and realizes that the red shouldn’t have been his first worry.

Virgil’s face is slack, peaceful, not unlike the little amount of times they can catch him nightmare-less-ly sleeping of the little amount of times the youngest manages to fall asleep in the first place. But he looks terrible. While the gloomy side has always had a paler complexion than the rest of them, his skin looks like he’s just been on a fight with a flour sack. His skin looks almost gray and somehow dulled, not even his lips colorful enough to show any sort of contrast. And his eyeshadow. Oh, his eyeshadow.

Patton doesn’t realize it at first, certain that something’s terribly wrong, but unable to quite place it. For some reason, Virgil looks younger, more vulnerable, more childlike, and also more like… He looks more like Thomas. And he now sees it. The eyeshadow. There’s barely any eyeshadow. He has dark bags under his eyes, yes, which make him look exhausted and sick, but other than that he looks as if he had spent hours doing his best to get the makeup off his face, the faintest fuzzy smudges left under his eyes.

Something inside his chest goes tight and it feels like an elephant is standing on his heart and lungs.

(He knows how to phrase it because he’s heard those exact same words from Virgil before. Is this truly how Anxiety has always felt like?)

Eyeshadow is Virgil’s trait. He can touch it up, play with it as with any kind of makeup; it can vary extent and intensity. But it can never be gotten rid of. It’s a part of what he is. And yet now is almost gone.

He puts a hand against the pale cheek and all he feels is cold skin.

“L-logan?” he tries, looking at the latter, because if there’s anyone who can fix this, that’s their Logic. Said side has cut Virgil’s shirt off, leaving only the sleeves hidden by his hoodie, and is now cleaning the cut and putting some cream on it, Roman getting bandages ready next to him. Logan looks at him, then at Virgil, then gulps.

“Try to wake him up” is all he says, looking at Patton right in the eyes, voice tight.

And so Patton does.

He holds Virgil’s face in both hands, thumbs caressing his skin.

“…Kiddo?” he asks, aware of the waver and fear on his voice. No change “Virgil? Hey, Kiddo, can you open your eyes for me?” he whimpers “Please, Sweetie, I just need you to answer me okay? You can even pout if you want, just anything is fine” he barely makes out “If you really don’t wanna say anything that’s fine, just- just show me you can hear me, okay?” he sobs, aware of the fact that he can’t really afford to rely on expressions alone with how blurry everything looks right now. He clears the tears away with one hand and looks again, hoping for a change.

There’s none. And he doesn’t really know how to deal with that. It’s all too much.

The sobs escape him like water from a broken dam, pain on his chest making him double over, fear for his kiddo guiding his forehead towards Virgil’s.

“Patton…” he hears Roman, hands pulling him away.      

“He’s not waking up” he wails “I don’t know what’s wrong and he won’t wake up!”

“Patton, you have to let go of him, Roman needs to help me wrap the bandages” Logan orders. And he’s, of course, right. He can’t get in the way of taking care of his kiddo, so he lets go and lets the creative facet pull his sobbing body away.

He sits there, crying and worrying and fearing, while the other two wrap bandages around Virgil’s middle, Logan doing the wrapping while instructing Roman on how to carefully lift the unconscious side’s middle to get the gauze under his back. Their youngest doesn’t flinch, whine nor frown during that whole time. It makes Patton want to scream.

Once they’re done, the other two move Virgil to the couch, hoodie zipped close and blanket covering him. The oldest grabs and doesn’t let go of the latter’s hand from the moment they start moving him.

Then there’s silence. The most important thing -seeing to Virgil’s injury – has been taken care of, so now they’re painfully free to deal with the next issue.

“What the fuck happened” Roman asks with a frustrated tone, probably lacking bite due to how tired they all clearly feel. He’s sitting by Virgil’s feet, arms supporting him by his sides as if being in a constant state of about-to-get-up-and-pace-but-holding-myself-down. Patton doesn’t really have it in him to scold him.

Logan sighs from where he’s sitting on a chair he took from the dining room so he could watch Virgil, hands on his face, elbows on his knees. He pinches his nose with one hand after taking off his glasses with the other. He looks exhausted.

“We all know what happene-”

“You know what I mean” the fanciful side interrupts, serious and angry “Why is Virgil like this? What happened after I fainted?” he demands, looking to each of them. Patton himself is sitting on the floor by Virgil’s head, one hand grapping the other’s cold one. He averts his eyes, not knowing what to say. He’s just as confused, just as clueless as Princey feels.

Logan sighs again.

“I lost consciousness not long after you did. And I’m guessing it was the same for Patton” he says, glancing at him, to which he nods miserably.

“So Virge was the last one standing?” Prince asks with a touch of surprise and confusion. Patton nods again.

“He was still standing before I went night-night” he tries to lighten up with a smile, clearly failing.

Logan opens his mouth to say something but closes it before he can make any sound, only this time it seems to Patton that it isn’t because of being out of words, the other looks almost shy, as if ready to say something but choosing not to, which only makes Patton’s bad feeling grow.

“…I have a theory” Logan says after a while, and Patton finally feels something good appear between all the yucky things currently inside him, the latter’s sudden uncertainty to voice his thoughts gone in favor of any kind of explanation-equals-plan idea to hold on to; because of course Logan does, and if he does then it’s probably correct and he’ll have a way to fix it! “But I can’t truly confirm it until Thomas wakes up”

“You think he’s okay?” Patton asks with hope too strong to contain, both Roman and he looking at the logical side expectantly. The latter sighs again, before looking down. The oldest can feel worry and fear and uncertainty radiating from him in waves and the hope shrinks back down as if hurt.

“The fact that we’re having this conversation entails that Thomas is alive, otherwise we would be dead with him” and they both shudder at the thought, unable to understand how Logan can mention something like that so casually “The fact that we lost consciousness means he did so as well, and not only that, but he lost it due to something life threatening, most likely blood loss”

“Then how-?” Roman starts only to be cut off.

“The fact that we’re awake means he’s alive, which means someone treated him, so we were most likely found by someone who managed to get Thomas to a hospital. That would explain why we just woke up” Logan explains “If he was treated then he was sedated, which would keep us dormant”

“So he’s in a hospital now?” Patton asks, a huge weight lifting from his shoulders.

“He must be. Be we can’t be sure until he wakes up”

“Can’t we wake him? We’re awake so the drugs must be gone!” Roman asks as he stands up and stars pacing.

“You know we can’t” the older one sighs in frustration, standing up as well “Us awake doesn’t mean he’s no longer drugged, it means the sedation is wearing off. And not all of us are awake! He isn’t just sleeping, Roman, and even if he was, we both know the only one who maybe would be able to rouse him is Virgil, and he isn’t exactly available!”

“Is it the anesthesia?” Patton hurries to ask before Princey’s open mouth can start moving “Is that why he’s like this?” he pleads brokenly.

“… Maybe” Logan mutters, looking away from the other sides.

“What do you mean ‘maybe’?!” the younger demands “We’re awake! And that wouldn’t explain the blood!”

“I mean…” he huffs “I mean that maybe he’s unresponsive due to the sedatives. But no, he wouldn’t bleed because of them, nor would he be as… weak as he is right now.”

“Then why?!” Roman cries, heaving and trembling. Logan looks right back at him, unfazed and just as tense. The oldest looks between them with fearful eyes, scared by the all the negative emotions yet just as desperate for an answer Logan clearly suspects.

“…Because Thomas was”

Tags will be done later on (explanation in a note i just posted, i will link it later aswell!) Hope you guys like it! Don’t know when next part will be here, already have part of it ready, but it definitely won’t be before the holidays!

Also post tags will also be fixed and properly done later on!

Love you guys!

[fearfilledvirgil]

Ivity and Anx: part twelve

Summary: Virgil has to escape to the bathroom for a moment before he and Logan do a puzzle and talk about things.

Warnings: Need of permission stemmed by abuse, guilt, slight panic attack, mention of face bruising, brief insomnia mention, few swears

Word count:  2590

Pairings: Slowburn Prinxiety

A/N: I’m so sorry for the wait. In return, here’s a longer chapter that honestly isnt that long. Also, I think I’m going to do a timeskip at one point because this chapter was so hard to get out. I need to write more Roman and even I don’t like all this waiting to see Virgil and Roman interact again! Tell me what you want, friends. Taglist under the cut.

masterlist

Taglist: @rileyfirstname @verymuchanidiot @definentlynotjustanotherlemon @silversmith-91 @kanejandkruge @sander-fander-sides @lovecrazyjennybear @hexdream18243 @crows-with-hats @monikastec @definenormalifyoucan @i-am-absolute-fandom-trash @applecannibal @cats-with-blogs @bubblycricket @gay-girls-do-it-better @bunnyartie @quietlypondering @elusivefalsehoods @hghrules @royallyanxious @quietwords-loudthoughts @squishynonbinarytwink @sortablue @illogical-anxieties @savingshae @a-fander-named-skittles @thelowlysatsuma @ughthatsprettygay @im-so-infinitesimal

~•~

The awkward shuffle of feet. The silent pressing weight down onto his shoulders. The clasped hands in his lap. The fear pricking at his neck that made droplets of a cold sweat form near the hairs standing on their ends. The sound of a closing door. Logan was sitting on the bed now, opposite of where Virgil sat in his desk chair. Eyes were pressing into his chest, a gaze filled with the want to know. Logan wasn’t doing it intentionally; his craving to understand everything got in the way of how he usually handled these types of situation. Virgil’s leg was wobbling from side to side now, lip bitten and eyes darting back and forth. It was too much; the pressure was too much.

“Can I go to the...the bathroom real quick?” Virgil near whispered, making Logan all but snap right out of the curious haze that he found himself in. Virgil didn’t see this, as his eyes refused to make any sort of contact with Logan’s form. Instead they decided to focus on his own feet, and the plastic over the carpet floor underneath them.

“Of course you can,” Logan began with slight hesitation. Virgil heard him shift on the bed. “You’ve been here enough times that you really don’t have to ask anymore.”

That was all the confirmation that he needed. Granted--according to Logan--he didn’t need to ask for permission. But he still did, as Virgil wasn’t accustomed to doing anything in anyone’s presence without specifically seeing if it was okay or not. Old habits die hard, even though it technically isn't an old habit per say. The boy with a rapidly pounding heart slowly stood from the spinny chair, careful not to make it spin around as he did so, and proceeded to leave the bedroom.

As soon as he left, Logan brought a hand up to his temple. He shouldn’t have been pressing his eyes and his undying need to know into his friend. He let out a small groan and let his other hand join the first on his head before leaning over to set his elbows on his thighs. In this new leaned over position, he closed his eyes and attempted to think of another strategy. Of course the brooding, anxious mess that was Virgil would think the worst of what would happen once he told Logan whatever he was going to tell him. Logan took a deep breath, following the pattern that he used when Virgil came to him when panicking. He recently took to using it for himself when he was increasingly stressed, and it seemed to help just as much as it helped Virgil.

Logan acknowledged that in this friendship, he was usually the rock. There was nothing wrong with that; Virgil desperately needed someone he could trust. But in order to be that rock, Logan needed to put away that ever-present theorizing part of his brain. It was difficult for him to do, as analysing everything was second nature to him. Currently, though, the fact that one of his theories could be proven true was not the priority of the situation. The priority was Virgil being okay, and if he wasn’t, for Logan to help him be okay. The eldest Brian child took another deep breath and put aside his curiosity for the better of his friend.

Virgil, on the other hand, was not being as calm and logical about the situation at hand. He locked the bathroom door after he closed it, immediately leaning over the sink. He didn’t have to use the bathroom in all actuality, but he was fairly positive that Logan knew that too. Bathrooms were safe places. They were where Virgil could go to cry, clean himself up, or be alone. They had locks. Locks meant that people couldn’t get in and hurt him. It also meant that he couldn’t get out without unlocking it, but he didn’t like to think about that.

The boy leaning over the sink turned on the water by turning both the hot and cold faucets equally. He let the water flow for a few moments before testing the heat with one of his hands, his breathing starting to become uneven. Lukewarm, just like he liked it. Virgil took a moment to attempt to concentrate on his breathing, shakily taking in a long breath as he pushed up the sleeves of his hoodie. After they were at his elbows, he cupped the semi-cold water in his hands and brought it to his face. His heartbeat was still heavy and fast, but the splash of the water on his face calmed it some. Virgil repeated the action, also repeating a mantra in his head of ‘Its okay; he’ll understand.’

After a few more times of water meeting his face, Virgil heard a tentative knock on the bathroom door. It was Logan, it had to be. No one else in this house knocked like that when a door was locked.

“Virgil?” the soft and concerned voice of Logan proved him right. “You’ve been in there a while. Are… you safe?”

“Yeah, I just-” Virgil paused. Logan always knew when he was lying, for some reason. He also appreciated the other’s use of ‘safe’ instead of ‘alright.’ If Virgil knew anything, it was that his normal state of being didn’t really fall under the ‘alright’ category. “Stressed. Cold water helps.”

“I… I’m sorry if I put pressure on you. Will you maybe open the door for me?” Logan’s voice held nothing else but sincerity. It was only when the two were alone that he heard this amount of emotion in the older’s voice.

The sincerity alone made a pull on Virgil’s heart. The amount of care that Logan held toward him always pulled on him to let the other help. Virgil turned off the water, then quickly dried most of his face off with the hand towel hanging on the wall. He pulled down his sleeves, readying himself before opening the door.

It was times like these when Logan got to take a good, long, and hard look at what Virgil looked like. These times were rare, as the younger absolutely despised being stared at, especially in public. Virgil didn’t mind these specific times of prolonged looking as others, mostly because he knew that it was just a way for Logan to assess what exactly was wrong with Virgil.

The very first thing that Logan noticed, the most evident thing, was that there was a fading bruise on the edge of Virgil’s jaw. Next, as his eyes grazed over the younger’s face extensively, he found that Virgil’s cast down eyes were sunken in more than usual. That would mean that there hasn’t been much sleep. It was almost hard to tell that the bags underneath Virgil’s eyes were so prominent, but Logan had years of examining Virgil’s face under his belt. The black under-eye makeup couldn’t deceive Logan anymore. After acknowledging the sleepless eyes, Logan’s own eyes drifted to his friend’s purple hair. It was slightly rustled underneath the hood that was still over Virgil’s head, but that had basically become the norm for the younger.

After the fair few seconds of looking at every part of Virgil’s face, Logan moved forward with cautious footsteps. He gently placed his hands on his friend’s shoulders atop the heavy black jacket. The touch was extremely light, so if Virgil wanted to move away, he could. This shoulder touching was common, especially when Logan saw that Virgil needed comfort. When he felt the small touch underneath his jacket, Virgil unconsciously closed his eyes momentarily and leaned into it.

“You are safe here. You don’t have to tell me anything if you don’t want to, Virgil. We’ve already been over this. I care for you deeply, okay?” Logan spoke in his lower register, but not because he was angry or upset. Usually he used this lower but smooth tone to calm Virgil down from panic, and by the looks of it, he was close to an unhealthy level of panic already.

“Thanks, Lo. I’m just… Scared, is all? I know logically that you,” there was a pause as Virgil opened his eyes and gathered together his words. “That you care for me, and that you wouldn’t be mad at me? For what…” Virgil let out a breath, letting his tense shoulders relax. “For what it’s worth, I’ve been trying to syke myself up to tell you for a couple months now.”

Somehow, Virgil still held himself in an incredibly uncomfortable way. Logan released his hands from his shoulders, taking a deep breath himself as he watched Virgil sag back down and away from Logan’s touch. Logan’s eyebrows creased on their own accord as Virgil’s eyes casted themselves downward on their own as well. The two were at an impasse. One wanted to help, and the other wanted him to help too, but was still too caught up in his own fears. This, however, was an occurrence that happened often. Luckily, because it was a common thing, Logan knew how do combat it.

“Well, I did just get a new constellation puzzle, so maybe you could help me with that instead?” Logan shifted the conversation. Virgil lit up for a moment, his dark brown eyes sparking with a small excitement and connecting with Logan’s blue ones. He dimed to a small glow, a content smile settling on his face, as he began to nod. Logan nodded as well, a very similar smile settling on his face as well. He gestured his head back toward his room before leading the way back there.

When Virgil entered Logan’s bedroom for a second time that day, he got confused with himself. He was so caught up in his own thoughts that he neglected to see the start of a puzzle atop Logan’s desk. He was sitting in that desk chair not moments ago, and for some reason, Virgil decided not to look at the actual desk. His shoes and the floor just seemed so much interesting in the moment, apparently. Now that he was getting a good look at it in the half natural light of the bedroom, Virgil could see that there was the border of a dark blue and purple puzzle with flecks of white.

Virgil sat down on the spinny office chair as Logan pulled up the extra normal chair sitting in the corner of the room. He liked puzzles. More importantly, Virgil liked the repetitiveness of putting a puzzle together. It was calming, and it gave him something semi-productive to keep himself focused on. Logan enjoyed completing puzzles as well. He could put together the five-hundred pieces that made up the constellations he had on his desk alone in a few hours, but it was more enjoyable when he worked on them with Virgil. The two could spend forever together relishing in the quiet as they finished putting together all the parts until a clear picture formed.

~•~

The words that Virgil planned for the original reason he came over to Logan’s house began to rise in his throat after about an hour and a half of silently putting together the puzzle. He could feel it steadily rising, begging for attention as the consonants and vowels became a lump in his throat. Virgil stole a glance back at Logan who was obviously continuing to search where a specific puzzle piece would go. Of course he didn’t know what was lumping below Virgil’s Adam’s apple. Logan wasn’t a physic. Virgil replaced his eyes on the piece in his hand, gulping to try and keep the words down. This didn’t work in the slightest, so he decided to just rip it off like a band-aid.

“Ivity was Roman.” Virgil mumbled out quickly, the words meshing together to almost sound incoherent. He kept his eyes trained on the blue and slightly white piece of cardboard in his hand. He didn't want to see Logan’s reaction.

Logan, however, snapped his neck towards Virgil right as he began to speak. His eyebrows lifted as his jaw simultaneously slackened. He was right. Well, it wasn’t the theory that he had hoped to be confirmed today, but at least it was one of them. Almost since the start of Virgil and Creativity friendship, Logan had started theorizing on who he could be. Disclosing how long he had been trying to figure out who it was, and that he had been thinking that Roman was Creativity for a while now, was out of the question. Virgil already was so tense about this conversation, so there had to be a reason.

“I… had been thinking so for a while now,” Logan picked his words as carefully as he could as he turned to face his torso to Virgil. He set down the puzzle piece in his hand and adjusted his glasses. “I overheard Patton and Roman talking about an online friend Roman possessed having anxiety. That’s what sparked the idea in the first place. Even more so when Patton dropped the word ‘anxiety’ in a name-like fashion, but at that point I couldn't tell if it was the disorder or your alias. Then, in the hall, when I mentioned your tumblr internet friend, Roman perked up without meaning to. But that’s only to name a few.”

Virgil was silent for a moment, still looking away, before saying, “So you knew? And you didn’t tell me?” He began to fiddle with the piece he held. His voice sounded so hurt, so broken, that it made Logan’s heart twinge.

“I wanted to,” he started again with full truth enveloping his words. “But I didn’t want to break the relationship you two had. If I did, would you have cut contact with him?”

“Yes,” Virgil responded almost immediately. “I would rather have had the illusion broken earlier on then live in the lie that I was.”

“I take it that you… You cut contact with him, haven't you?” There was a tentative nod of Virgil’s head. “From what I heard and saw, Roman wasn’t lying.”

“Don’t try and fucking say that,” Virgil bit back, rolling the chair away from Logan. “There wouldn’t have been any other reason. Why? Take one look at Princey. He has everything.”

“Having everything doesn’t mean you can’t be in pain.” Logan retaliated, making the room become incredibly quiet. No one spoke for what felt like several minutes, but in reality was only one. Logan took a deep breath, returning to the puzzle. The last thing Logan wanted was for Virgil to go down into another spiral. He could never forgive himself if he was the reason that his best friend had yet another sleepless night.

“I’m sorry if I sounded harsh,” there was true sorrow behind Logan’s voice. The phonation of the words rose through the sentence as if it were a question. “Maybe, just maybe, think about it?”

As a matter of fact, Virgil was already thinking about it. He was pondering the validity of cutting Roman completely out of his life, but his mind was not having it. Despite the secondary look at who Creativity was, Virgil couldn’t shake the fear of everything being a well crafted lie. He wondered as he continued to stare at a new puzzle piece if everything in this messy situation could be put together and shown as clear as a finished puzzle. In Virgil’s current view it never may, but then again, maybe he just didn’t have all the pieces to the picture yet.

next part

[spkdnailbats]

Hyper-fixations!! (aka- my stan list)

yo so I've realized I always hyper-fixate on characters in media that I either relate to, wish to be like, or draw comfort from.... so bc I'm bored here's some peeps in this category:

•Taako (The Adventure Zone Balance) - want to be like - openly himself, multidimensional, fully realized creation, loved by many, charismatic, in a good and healthy relationship (thats also so supportive and cute and god wheres my gf version of kravitz???), unapologetic, went through some shit and came out different and with issues but is still just good, loves family, passionate

•Angus McDonald (The Adventure Zone Balance) - comfort character - hes just a sweet lil guy who just loves his weird found family and is just so smart and precious and i love him with my whole soul and being, makes me smile whenever he pops up

•Magic Brian (The Adventure Zone Balance) - comfort character - can never fail to make me laugh and smile

•Hurley (The Adventure Zone Balance) - relate to - a small ball of energy, typically a rule follower but likes to stray away sometimes, a gay!!, lowkey likes to race in my jeep (its only with my one friend and its not a legit race but we say it is and its v fun)

•Carey Fangbattle (The Adventure Zone Balance) - relate to / want to be like - tiny but big personality, a gay!!, fiesty, sneaky, tough cookie, loves a tall butch girl (i do not have a tall butch girl to love but maybe someday!!), badass little rogue (i wish)

•Virgil "Anxiety" Sanders (Sanders Sides/Thomas Sanders) - relate to - anxious ball of something, many people consider cute although deny it / dont believe it, self deprecating!!, needs a hug, tries to be intimidating but fails, the mom™ friend

•Lapis Lazuli (Steven Universe) - relate to - felt lost, felt ostracized from friends (sometimes true sometimes not - gee, cognitive distortions are a bitch), found people and felt comfortable and at home with them, found family, self deprecating, separates self to not get hurt, wants to protect but also avoid, sad™

•Peridot (Steven Universe) - comfort character - had genuine growth as a character which is nice to see, is silly but also can be serious, makes me smile whenever i see her

•Howl (Howl’s Moving Castle) - relate to / want to be like - very much himself, overdramatic af (drama queen and a diva), sees the best in people, cares based on personality rather than looks (calls an old lady beautiful bc she has a good heart), a versatile lgbt (looks and acts like a gay but dates a pretty girl, the dream ngl), fashionable af and dyes hair fun colors

•Calcifer (Howl’s Moving Castle) - relate to - sassy little bitch, underappreciated until absolutely needed, small and typically seen as tame but can have a big personality at times

•Sophie Hatter (Howl’s Moving Castle) - relate to / want to be like - the odd one out, seen as ordinary, never the pretty one but always the average or forgettable one, always someone better and not often liked, when liked its always true and based on a beautiful personality, finds real love in an unlikely situation (wheres my love in life?), makes own path and doesnt care what people say/think, ambitious, does what needs to be done even if its hard, comforting maternal presence but also dominant and assertive when needed, gets shit done

•Kiki (Kiki's Delivery Service) - relate to / want to be like - is an outsider but finds her place eventually, inexperienced but trying her best, works hard in all she does, makes something of herself (i hope someday thats me), makes the best out of a bad situation

•Stitch (Lilo & Stitch) - relate to - lost, searching for home and family, feel constantly different from everyone else, runs away from problems before finally solving/fixing them

•Baymax (Big Hero 6) - comfort character - was there for hiro and did whatever possible the whole movie to help him (learning about grieving, sacrificing, etc), and there was a time in my life that I really needed that presence and didn’t have it that way at the time, but now 14 years later I’m in a much better state mentally but baymax still makes me cry bc he reminds me of stuff™, (tbh i got to “meet baymax” at disney when i was 16 and lowkey was so excited and cried a bit, and my friend bought me a stuffed animal baymax that afternoon for my birthday and i sobbed and carried it around in my bag for the rest of the trip)

•Hiro (Big Hero 6) - relate to - ((this is gonna get sad sorry ://)) so like hiro i lost a sibling (however i was much younger than hiro and my sibling was younger than me) in a way that it was inflicted by someone else but was “unintentional/collateral” and i didnt really deal with it for a while until i actually got help and started doing things again to get back into normal life. i sob beginning to end during bh6 bc i feel for hiro and i know what hes going through and what its like and it sucks

•Alice (Alice in Wonderland) - relate to - gets lost in own head a lot, kinda a wonky imagination, doesnt follow own advice (”i give myself very good advice, but i very seldom follow it”), happy doing own thing until lost or lonely which then leads to fear and anxiety, doesnt know who to trust, trying to find something that isnt easily found

•Oswald the Lucky Rabbit (Disney) - relate to - ((please look up oswalds story if you dont know who he is- in brief terms, he was a cartoon walt disney made and abandoned when he made his own studio (c. 1920s) and was replaced by mickey and was forgotten about until 2006)) cast aside, forgotten about, replaced, wants to belong

•Carson Phillips (Struck by Lightning) - want to be like / relate to - snarky and sarcastic bitch, does what he needs to in order to get shit done, a “penetrating personality” (literally a quote from the mf book), ambitious, goals bigger than anyone thinks they should be, makes morally ambiguous decisions to get what he wants

•Veronica Sawyer (Heathers) - relate to / want to be like - got some shitty friends who we dont really like but stick around with for convenience or something, has ambitions in life, stands up for what she believes in and for injustice and is generally a brave badass (i wish i was)

•Heather McNamara (Heathers) - relate to - lost, follows “friends”, tries to fit in with those around, sad™

•Elizabeth Swan (Pirates of the Caribbean) - want to be like - brave, stands up for what she believes in even if it might get her killed, tough (literally the pirate king), does what she wants cause she a bad bitch, tough, literally so pretty??, found true love in an unlikely place at an unlikely time, literally got married while fighting next to her true love vs the undead fish pirated while the ship is stuck in a whirlpool, badass af

•Kurt Hummel (Glee) - want to be like / comfort character - open about who he is, fashionable af, in the actual cutest couple on glee yall can fight me about it, learned to love himself then never stopped, a sassy queen always (i have so many of his mannerisms smh), went from cute twink to muscle boy and wow we love a glow-up, went from being bullied into submission and scared to being open and standing up for others even if he gets hurt, always made me smile, first real lgbt person i saw in the media and helped me embrace myself fully

•Klaus Hargreeves (The Umbrella Academy) - relate to - outcast, lotta mental health issues, music lover and bad dancer, headphones always on, bad experiences and trauma formed self, kinda lazy

•Vanya Hargreeves (The Umbrella Academy) - relate to - pushed aside, never a priority, taken advantage of, has own skill no one acknowledges, sad™

•Elphaba Thropp (Wicked) - relate to - cast out, different from everyone else, unique in own way, never the pretty one

----------------------------------------------------

and some honorable mentions of real people I connect with comfort and strive to be like in my day to day life (like ive taken on a lot of their mannerisms or sayings):

•Patrick Stump (Fall Out Boy) - literally the sweetest person ever, super talented in so many different ways, so positive and inspirational (esp about mental health)

•Gerard Way (My Chemical Romance, Umbrella Academy) - always accepting of people (esp lgbt!! gay rights!!), multi-dimensional, versatile talents (singer, song writer, artist, comic book writer)

•Mitch Grassi (Pentatonix/Superfruit) - so openly himself, genuine, verbal about mental health (esp anxiety and depression), phenomenal singer, so kind to everyone, unique, fashionable, sassy as hell, lgbt!!, shows dreams can come true

•Chris Colfer (Glee/Author) - super talented (singing, acting, writing), lgbt!!, snarky as hell, super sweet but also super funny, (tbh ive stanned him since like 2012 and hes the only celeb ive ever met and i will always stan that man)

•Hayley Kiyoko (Singer) - lesbian jesus, came out even though she was told it could ruin her career, so truly herself, open about lgbt issues and mental health, positive towards everyone, encourages everyone to open up and be unapologetically themselves

•Eugene Lee Yang (Try Guys) - authentically himself, isn’t afraid of what people thing, does his own thing even if its different and odd to some, lgbt!!, a shady bitch in the best way, has his own style and kills it always

•Daniel Howell (Youtuber) - open about mental health and most recently his past as well as lgbt experience, can make you laugh and cry at the same time somehow, more talented than he thinks he is, shows you can get through anything

[tumblunni]

No, which is a shame cos that could have been an interesting plotline.

This is actually a complete lie! Seriously its mentioned later on by Virgil that he didnt write it himself, if I recall correctly. Also I cant remember if I even mentioned this riddle in the first place, lol. It came along with the original warning about the town being blown up in 10 days. Its just something like ‘as the moon sets the sun must rise’ oooo generic most cliche bullshit forever, blah...

Random out of context stupid line from protagonist.

Answer: nope. Just screenshotted this exchange cos its another potential cool plot point, I think. I mean, imagine if the bad guys held this over the protagonist’s head! ‘Hey cooperate with us and we can turn you back to normal!’

Obligatory ‘lets skip ahead 10 days to the end of the deadline’ moment. At least its vaguely described that he spent the 10 days planning with these guys to pull off a plan and for some reason it could only work at the last five seconds. Also, surprise surprise, its AGAIN the ‘esports server lets you access the political server somehow and shut down the entire government’ thing. Gahhh

Oh and apparantly mr final badguy’s plan to murder a whole town isnt just something he’s doing in secret, the whole government voted on this and agreed. So that just makes a lot of the happy endings in this game seem awful in retrospect, cos none of them involve dismantling this system or anything...

Random description of how the town killing will work, which doesnt really affect anything in the plot, but at least they’re expanding upon the worldbuilding for like.. ONE thing. Hooray!

Cyrus comes along and clocks plot device woman in the gut at the very last second and not any time earlier. Seriously, why does he keep ONLY finding the protagonist at the very last day when he can LITERALLY CONTROL TIME???

And then we have this weird fakeout of apparantly big brother’s voice calling out to our protagonist during their last stand against Cyrus. GEE I WONDER IF THIS IS A TRAP? And again, you dont have an actual choice in the matter. It just automatically forces you into one option if you havent raised your relationship values high enough. This one in particular REALLY annoyed me, cos I made every choice to agree with Virgil during this route and it still gave me the bad ending. Apparantly even the stuff you do before the routes diverge affects it, somehow the decision of not punching the bully and deciding to yes indeed stalk that random girl somehow affects your friendship with a woman you won’t meet for an hour’s worth of gameplay time!

[princeanxious]

Current Au scenario in my head rn.. Shattered Raine.

Roman is a Prince, but of a different mortal realm, kinda like demons verses angels in hell and heaven, and how they have been technically able to walk among the mortal human realm as well as exist in their own realm and all that jazz.

Say that this realm that hes a prince in is like earth, but is home to demon-esque humans with powers and the ability to hop between realms and shit, maybe there are two other types of realms alongside this one and the human one, with angel-esque humanoids and then one thats more of a mix of between Angel and Demon esque humanoids, but none are inherently good or evil. They are just like humans, who overall have a good moral compass, but have the bad natured souls in the cracks, yknow?

Either way, the only ones who cannot actively go through to different realms of existance while they are still alive are humans. The only way humans can is when they die. At that point, human souls are given the option to reincarnate on earn(the usual option amongst humans) or (usually if said soul is broken and battered from the wildness that is earth) take a detour/choose to visit or live in one of the other three realms (and if they ever so desired, they could return to earth whenever they wanted if they wanted to reincarnated again, but the system of reintegrating a soul whos spent time away with a system that attempts to wipe the soul memory clean to give another life is another story all together and unimportant to me as I currently would like to get on with the story) it's also rare but not impossible for a Human to fully integrate into one of thw other realms and become one of those realms people, power and all.(weak at first and when untrained nor properly practiced, they usually remain harmless despite learning their set of magical skills unless given the aforementioned plus a lot of time.) This can be granted by the Top Tier powerful beings of the realms aside from earth, and is very hard(impossible) to reverse, so its a big decision to make(usually the earth-broken souls dont find the derision very hard, knowing that compared to earth, any of the other realms were just slightly more compassionate, definately not as large, and definately more accommodating in the sense of healing broken souls into something new)

Anyways, Roman is a Prince, Logan and Patton are also kinda in the same boat as nobility and princes but don't hold as much power as Roman does, ect. Ect. In their realm, the "demon" realm or 'more exotic and diversified magical populace realm,' really, the Top Tier powerful beings live as royalty(without the awful part of monarchy, as money isn't really a super big thing in this realm, or any of the other realms minus earth because these realms have magic. Companionship is slightly more cherished, money just gets you stuff like clothing and personal belongings. Housing isnt dictated by money, ect. -I'll figure this out more later- Very weird for the average human soul to get used to but, anyways)

As previously mentioned, beings from these other realms can walk on earth unbothered, usually masked as a human to remain undetected. Usually they do it for curiousity(like Logan), to visit human friends(like Patton), or because they were simply bored( and looking for inspiration, like Roman) and don't rely on the reincarnation systems to visit

Virgil is a human, and in his current earth life, he is honestly doing pretty terribly, enough so where he ends up set on being on the track of a broken soul; if any being from the other worlds looked into his soul, they would see it shattered like a phone screen, ready to splinter and fall apart. Any being who noticed this would have no doubt in their mind that Virgil's soul was young, and had simply gotten a bad earthen roll far too early. It would surprise them more if the kid didn't end up choosing to escape to the safer realms, considering how much time the young souls existance still had--it was almost like looking at an abandoned and injured infant creature, clinging to life whilst its chance of making it were rapidly declining by the minute. There was nothing they could do to help the human, and only Top Tiers could fenagle the system and bring fourth a human whos live had yet to end. (The only way this is exceptable is if said soul is destined to ruin at any possible day, and ot was not a matter of if but a matter of when. These souls are those titled Broken Souls) but to find such a soul so broken at its beginning? It left many aching, returning early with a reminder that earth was never truly that kind despite its varied beauty.

It was almost unheard of to find a soul so young, so broken. Normally earth's went easy on new souls until they were mature enough to handle earths random rolls, but somehow there seemed to be a mix up, and now this soul's experience was cut short? The thought had bugged Roman for some time now, especially after hearing the rumors of such a sorrowful and terrifying find among his people, so he sought to find out for himself.

Finding Virgil wasnt hard, considering the little human, who looked barely 20 and yet remained an unknowing beacon to others that 20 years had been more than enough to shatter him, was always being watched or spotted by creatures of the other realms and so asking around lead Roman to now, staring at the poor little thing. Sitting in the rain, at night, face upturned to the sky, and utterly soaked. Despite the shivers wracking the others thin frame, the soaked human didnt move from his place.

Interest peaked, mind made up, and magic stirring within his being, he walks up and plucks the little human out of the rain(unsurprised that the human is only half conscious and absolutely freezing) and doesnt hesitate to sink out of the earth realm and interact with the reincarnation system, getring the okay before appearing in his own realms castle, and demanding for Logan and Patton to greet him, because this was important. Virgil Raine was important, and if he wasnt quick and careful, the human soul would probably finally shatter in his fingertips.

So, cue a scene where Roman uses his magic to snap & strip Virgil of his wet clothes and instead replace them with loose heavy and warm, weighted pajamas, woolen slippers and socks, and a heavy and enchanted ever-warm blanket to wrap around the shaking human. When Patton and Logan arrive, they find Roman cradling the human bundle in his arms, worry etched across his face despite the slowly but surely receeding shaking.

Both Logan and Patton jump into action, Patton immidiately tuning in his specialty to help heal the humans physical ailments(making sure the young adults body didnt just give out on them) while Logan investigated Virgils soul.

I have more to this definately but its 1 am and I need to sleep probably so yeah. Maybe I'll call this Shattered Raine if anything comes of this. I have a lot of time on my hands anyway, so why not try? (Maybe I'll open an askblog. For not I'll settle on making a taglist if anyones interested.)

Adding my writings taglist in a reblog!

[tumblunni]

Why the random glowy pink eyes, and why are all the security guards just the same guy...?

ANYWAY, protagonist first uses his powers while trying to escape from the failed heist attempt, and we get a lil minor exposition on Virgil. We get the name of an important scientist character, who seems to be one of the people reoccuring in the protagonist’s still-unexplained psychic dreams. And apparantly Virgil was designed specifically to help out the destined whoever who had this time power, blablabla, so he’s somehow programmed to be unaffected by time powers.

Also, confirmation that the weird watch is meant to be protagonist’s holo-phone! That kinda seems really uncomfortable and lower tech than regular phones, yo. Like seriously aside from making holograms, how is it preferrable? And how are holograms preferrable anyway, it just means everyone else can see your screen!

Oh, and protagonist’s time powers immediately fail anyway, and they all get caught. So this scene was completely pointless! Well, aside from showing him actually using his powers for once, I guess.

You all get captured by cyrus and Mr Never Before Mentioned. he’s apparantly the president or something, and he just starts randomly expositing a bunch of answers to everything instead of executing you. Then he locks you up instead of executing you. Then, predictably, you end up escaping and ruining all of his plans.

ANYWAY! HIS PLANS! Apparantly the evil president has been (somehow) making artificial time control guys (for something) And he could only do it by somehow seeding it into the general populace and then tracking down anyone who manifests the powers, or whatever. And he’s gonna use their powers to... something. Because already having total control of the space station and unanimous support isnt enough, he just has to risk ruining his whole plan for no reason at all. And also now he’s planning to blow up your hometown and blame it on the rebellion, even though he literally just said that the slum area is an important breeding ground for his time power test subjects. MAN, this guy ain’t a good villain! Cyrus, why you even working for him?? You were a bad villain too but you ended up not even really doing anything after your dramatic reveal!

And yeah, this is just what becomes of the whole time limit thing! The whole events of the route take place in like ONE DAY and then it flashes forward with our protag being locked up in prison for the next week and a half. WHAT A WASTE!!!

Dr Arwa pops along to chat with us while we’re chained to the goddamn wall, and just expositions a little, then leaves. I guess she’s like a minion of the bad guy who’s trying to take him down from the inside, and that’s why she sent Virgil to help us but can’t help us in person? Also... is it me or is that a weirdly dirty-sounding way to say ‘dude can possess other computers’? XD

Oh and she just mentions some random other coworker of hers that has a plan. And we’ve never met her but now its totes integral for us to do her plan, blablabla, and just... i cnat keep up with all these new plot swerves crawling out of the woodwork...

UMM< NO YOU DIDNT Seriously, he never said he promised her anything??? And her backstory scene went by so fast, and there wasnt really much sense of emotion or bonding given from it... Man, this is meant to be ‘Mari route’ but she barely appears in it and doesn’t really have any impact. Seriously he just remembers her at random points and that’s it. If anything, she actually has a bigger role in the climax of the route thats meant to be about her boss! (but I’ll get to that when I get to it)