#unsure if i'm explaining myself or asking for advice but ehhhhhhhh

[takahashitakeda]

i am having a moment of “oh god, i probably ought to just drop all my blogs” even the ones i literally just made ?? idk i just have so many moments of being really, really overwhelmed and intimidated by like 80% of blogs, even mutuals, and it’s not as if anyone’s done anything wrong?? but as i continuously whine about on here i get so stressed out when i can’t even like ?? message someone?? even tho i like them and our characters have literally Every Reason to interact even in canon??? but at the same time i’m like..... where else would i go to rp?? and to rp these characters?? not to mention i like just about everyone i’ve met so far ??

 i just am not sure what i can do to make this less difficult for myself ?? rp has never been so socially stressful for me in my life, though i imagine it’s the indie scene that’s really difficult to get comfortable in ?? i’ve considered dropping my canon characters and focusing on OCs (bc at least then i don’t have expectations of being Super In Character according to canon in games/comics/shows/whatever the source material is) but then i also consider doing the opposite so i have less worries of being, like, stupid ??

i have no idea how to really explain this otherwise and at least on my m*rvel blogs i’ve considered joining a ring/group rp, but then i’m worried about limiting my options/potential and also a lot of rules/expectations (especially compared to when i ran my own rps-- but maybe that’s why it kinda died after 4 years)

anyway i have no idea what i’ll do, probably nothing, considering i’d feel REALLY stupid going awol after bringing up 3 new blogs and having put so much into these mk ones, but i will try to blabber less about this in the future