#uhh anyway if any of my mutuals or ppl i know see this. howdy. dw about me i am experiencing some of the horrors
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Whoo boy i finally figured out what about submas angst hurts me so much, even when it's not meant to be angst. As i suspected it is an inner problem of mine mixed with the lack of closure. What the fuck happened to make me so sad over characters who are alone. I know exactly what happened actually but nvm that.
#personal#yeah im not putting this in the tag#idk man it just feels so trivial in retrospect that it seems hard to believe it fucked me up this bad#and yet here i am#i found a pattern in my blorbos and the one thing they have in common is theyre alone and lack closure.#i guess the one thing that protected me with the others is that we as the players/audience had closure before the characters#in this case we know fuck all about what's going to happen and the hope is destroying me. give me an answer gamefreak it can be an answer i#don't like but i can grieve about that. i just need an answer#i cant grieve for something that hasnt happened and the hope that it might not is getting too heavy#im supposed to be over my period induced moodswings and yet here i am. reading a single sentence that upsets me#that isnt even framed as angst#basically first thing in the morning#and fucking crying over it for like half an hour#i need to fix myself. how the fuck do i do this#uhh anyway if any of my mutuals or ppl i know see this. howdy. dw about me i am experiencing some of the horrors#but i know they cannot truly hurt me permanently and that i will be fine. just having a healthy dose of dramatics <3#so you dont like need to do anything about it. like a nice word of support would be cool but my feelings r not ur responsibility#so you dont need to worry you can also just scroll past :)
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