#train wreck of a relationship lol. mike too but he's the one who just said he loved her on her good days and on her bad days so i don't | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

commander-hanji-zoe · 4 years

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Seven is the magic number

As an FYI, this whole piece is a train wreck. I was having a little fantasy about what it would be like to be in a polyamorous relationship with Erwin, Levi, Mike, Hange, Nanaba & Moblit - look in my head I’m greedy & wild lol. This is just one chapter, but I’m tempted if people enjoy it to make it a collection of works, have a proper chapter for the first part & then a chapter for the first time with each & a final chapter which is a 7 person orgy so we’ll see.

The reader in this is a cis-gendered female reader, but I do plan on writing more stuff that isn’t reader based as well as a lot of reader based material that is gender neutral so it’s as inclusive as possible. Also as an fyi I usually write Hanj/Hange as Gender fluid, but in this fic I have written them as female.

Pairing: Reader x Erwin x Levi x Mike x Hanji x Moblit x Nanaba

Word Count: 6,008 Warnings: Smut/unprotected sex

Summary: The reader is invited by Erwin to join in with a polyamorous relationship, there’s several dates without sexual contact but when y/n confirms she is happy with the set-up, they are visited by each member of the relationship individually for their first time together and to get better acquainted. At the end of the night (and after much smut) there’s a more fluffy bit where they all fall peacefully asleep together - which is a cuddle pile I’d love to be in.

The offer had been unexpected but not at all unpleasant. The time you’d spent with the scouts suggested there was something going on behind closed doors between some of the older veterans. But when Commander Erwin called you into his office and explained the situation you were left more than a little red faced.

They’d all noticed you and talked about adding another to their relationship for some time, they were just waiting for the right person and it turned out that was you. Beforehand you hadn’t really ever thought about being in a polyamorous relationship, you weren’t even really sure how you felt about them or how they worked. But now Erwin was inviting you to be a part of his family alongside Levi, Hanji, Nanaba, Mike and Moblit.

You accepted, surprising yourself with how quickly you agreed to be a part of it. The agreement was that you would have several trial evenings with them, each of a different nature and at the end Erwin would ask whether you wanted to join.

The first date had a hard rule about no sexual contact, Erwin was adamant about that. He wanted to make sure you were comfortable with all of them and that you got a feeling of what it would be like to be a part of their group.

The third date was when you cuddled with them and kissed for the first time.

The fourth was much of the same but you got to watch as the others slept together, Erwin meanwhile holding you in his arms and stroking your hair.

It was only after these first four dates that the Commander called you back to his office to discuss the next stages. It was strange in the sense that it felt overly formal, like going for a job interview, but Erwin had to be sure you were a right fit for them and that you too were comfortable.

“Well y/n what do you think?”

You gulped and nodded, yes, you wanted to be a part of it.

The Commander didn’t look up from his papers and left you shuffling awkwardly from foot to foot wondering if you were excused or if the commander would ask more questions. When he finally looked up, the candle on his desk reflected in his eye, the corners of his lips turned upwards to form the smallest smile.

“Very well,” he reached out his arms for you and pulled you into him so you slid onto his lap.

You went in to kiss him, rocking your hips as you did so but Erwin put his hands on your shoulders to stop you, “Ahhh ah patience my dear, patience.”

You all but let out a soft whine, you’d been so close to him and why on earth would he pull you into his lap like that if he wanted nothing? Perhaps it was as simple as him teasing you or to assert his dominance as the head of the group.

You let out a small gasp as he cupped your chin in his large hands, his fingers just pulling your lower lip down a little. His piercing blue eyes just watched you as if monitoring your expression as he snaked his other hand up your neck and into your hair. It might have been one of the most intense moments of your life and knowing that it most certainly wasn’t going to go anywhere, at least in that moment, only served to heighten your curiosity.

You could feel him growing hard underneath you so why didn’t he want to take you now, but then that was part of the game, like he said patience. How much sweeter would this be when it came to having your first evening with them all.

“Good things come to those who wait isn’t that right my precious?” He stroked your cheek with such delicate grace, his eyes staring at you in earnest.

You nodded and immediately shuddered when the hand that had been in your hair moved down and gripped your thigh, he squeezed tightly for a moment and then removed all touch from you.

“Y/N you are dismissed. We will see you here tomorrow night.”

You gulped and nodded weakly, “Yes Sir,” you knew your cheeks were blushing a furious shade of scarlet but you couldn’t have cared less.

As you left the Commander’s office you found yourself unable to breathe and your legs were shaking so much you felt like a newborn foal walking for the first time. It was only when Erwin’s door closed behind you that you were able to breathe and leant back against the wall, your knees still feeling weak.

“Y/N are you alright?”

You jumped in response, you weren’t expecting anyone to be right outside. You looked up to Rico looking at you.

You nodded, “Yes i’m fine.”

“You look a little flustered.”

Oh no, you could feel the colour darkening once again, “Oh it was just some paperwork that got me all confused, the commander was helping me with it,” you replied rather pathetically.

Rico smiled and nodded, “Right, see you around.”

As you walked away you let out a long sigh of relief as you head back to your duties feeling thoroughly frustrated but more excited for your first official date as part of this wonderful group. Erwin had explained to you what would happen and your mind raced in equal parts nerves and excitement as you thought about it. You would get a chance to be intimate with each member of the group and then would spend the night with Erwin.

First you were visited by Mike. He was rough but loving and in his arms there was a brief moment with him where you felt like you finally understood what true love felt like. His hands were so large he was able to grab handfuls of you and he left no part of your body untouched or ignored. When he first entered the room, he took his time undressing you, taking you apart piece by piece, just a small taste of how soon he would make you come undone. While some of the others were happy with you already naked on the couch, Mike wanted to underdress you and worship you. He continually praised you and stroked your hair, when you made him feel good he wanted you to know just how good. Although the kissing and sex itself was rough, he never made you feel like you had to do anything. When he pushed you back onto the couch and dove between your legs, his hands gripping your thighs and kissing them, swirling his tongue on your smooth skin and sucking. Leaving a trail of perfect little marks into your inner thigh. When he started to work his tongue on you, kissing you and licking, these were the moments you thought he must have been sent from the gods to make you feel that good.

He constantly checked you were okay, especially when he undressed and you saw the size of his cock for the first time. The audible gulp that came from you made him concerned for a moment, but those kisses that made you melt, the way his hands were in your hair as you went to suck his cock, you knew Mike was the gentlest of giants. He fucked you against the wall, your legs wrapped round his waist and hands in his hair. Mike was loud during sex but it wasn’t just grunts and groans, no, he was full of sweet nothings and delicious promises of tomorrow. Mike continually made sure you were comfortable and he refused to cum until he had made you reach climax first. You came with him inside you, having moved from the wall to the couch, his fingers working between your legs tipping you over the edge.

Your nails scratched down his back as he fucked you into the couch and with a loud grunt came inside you, his body shuddering repeatedly as he said your name. His forehead, sweaty and hair matted pressed against your own. “Damnit, I wish I had you all to myself tonight.” Those were the last words he said to you before he left the room.

Levi later would complain that you’d been too loud, Erwin had a smirk on his face, he knew the reason behind the agitation. It wasn’t that he hated hearing you fuck, quite the opposite, it drove him crazy till he was rutting against Erwin’s leg, desperate for release. Jealous that Mike was getting you first before he, jealous that Mike was getting anything before him.

Levi was next, he left you shaking and white-knuckled. He wasn’t as strict as you’d imagined him to be or quite as dominant. Yes, he took control, they practically all did but it was more than that, he wanted you to explore him as much as you liked and feel every second. With his sharp tongue he was incredible when he went down on you, doing things in a way no one had ever done to you, his tongue slipped inside you, you could hear him moan at your taste and then he went lower flicking his tongue over your anus. You gave a surprised cry but when his tongue dipped in you couldn’t help but hold onto his hair with a tighter grip. He wore such a satisfied smile when he looked up from between your legs, in truth it was more of a smirk.

It surprised you how long it took for him to get undressed or show any need for his own pleasure, the stamina and control was impressive. When he climbed back up your body he was excruciatingly slow, leaving a trail of kisses from between your legs up over your stomach and over the dip between your breasts and flicking his tongue over your nipples. He sucked at your neck hard enough you knew he’d have left a love bite. When he instructed you to ride his face, you were nervous but his hands guided you and honestly being commanded by the Captain in that strict tone made you start to believe it was possible to orgasm from words alone.

Sex with Levi didn’t last too long with him, he was so pent up from before that you’d guessed he wouldn’t last too long. But it was good. Really, really good. Every minute he would turn you into a new position to see what felt good for you. His kisses were full of teeth and his hands in your hair. He was the only one to ask you if you minded anal, it wasn’t something you’d tried before but with him you were willing to give it a go. He hesitated before settling on saving it for another day but not without leaving you first with a parting gift. He inserted a silver butt plug, fox tail attached inside you before he left the room leaving you gasping and wishing all your holes were filled.

Hanje and Moblit shared the bed with you at the same time, that was part of their deal, they rarely left one another’s side both inside and outside of the bedroom. They were incredibly cute together, Hanji was as excitable as she was in the research room, curious to explore every part of you, Moblit would do anything she told him to. Hanji marvelled over the butt plug Levi had given you, she was full of praises and telling you how cute you looked, occasionally tugging on the fox tail so you could feel the pull between your cheeks. She then push it in a little making you moan, Moblit all the while gently stroking himself, lazy and slow strokes up and down his cock. Hanji nuzzled into your breasts and for a moment you wished you could just curl up with her and fall asleep. She kissed you slowly, sucking your lower lip and sliding her tongue in your mouth, on top of you, you raised your hips to meet hers, the two of you slowly moved as one.

You didn’t mean to do it but when she grabbed your breasts with one hand for leverage as the other went between your legs giving you feather strokes and looked at you with such a commanding stare you called her daddy… and god did that feel good. After you came, Hanji rolled over to allow Moblit to be with you, he was sweet, full of small tender kisses, checking you were okay, slowly and lazily making love to you as Hanji stroked both of your heads, taking it in turns to kiss you then him. She continued to praise you both telling you what a great job you were both doing making Moblit blush furiously. He came on your belly, there was no need to clean up however as he bent down and licked his own mess from your body, Hanji joined him so the two of them licked you clean, kissing one another as they went.

Going down on Hanji was one of the easiest decisions you made, though she was controlling she was incredibly sweet and all you wanted was to make her feel as good as she had made you feel. Moblit helped to guide you and show you exactly where she liked it. Once you were between her legs, Moblit sat on you and massaged your back and shoulders with oil as you brought Hanji to orgasm.

Nanaba made the sweetest love, you spent most of your time alone with her just talking and kissing. She took it slow and wanted to really get to know you before she got acquainted with your body. Her kisses tasted like honey, she took control but made you feel safe throughout. She tied your wrists up with soft scarfs and loose knots, it was as if she were inside your mind, she knew exactly how to touch you, where, how much pressure and when to move on. Her fingers moved so gently against you but with such precision your toes were curling. She fucked you with a glass dildo as she went down on you, ensuring you felt the best you possibly could. The way she worked was slow and teasing for a bit and then she’d go much faster before slowing again, making your back arch and chest rise and fall heavily. Nanaba wanted nothing in return, telling you that getting to bring you such pleasure was all the joy she needed for now. Instead she masturbated in front of you, getting herself off with the same toy that had been inside you a moment earlier, you watched the colour in her cheeks, the way her small breasts bounced when she threw her head back.

You wished you’d grown up with her, she was like a big sister in many ways, so knowledgeable and reassuring. But also god did she have the softest thighs and cutest breasts along with a neck begging to be kissed. When Nanaba’s time came to leave you felt sad, you could have stayed with her all even sharing secrets and curled up under the covers, you wanted to read her palms and do tarot readings with her before cuddling naked and seeing what happened.

For you’d been so close to telling her you loved her when you came.

You were surprised when Mike came back for more, “I wanna try something different with you, will you let me if I look after you?” He asked. You had no idea what he had planned but there was no decision to be made, you already knew. You trusted Mike and would do anything he asked of you, you knew he would look after you no matter what. He opened a door to what you assumed was a cupboard but instead there was a small room, what appeared to be a sex swing already assembled from the ceiling hung in the middle. “Well?” He asked with a wicked grin. Your knees trembled as you begun to walk towards the room, letting out a small yelp when Mike picked you up and carried you across. Afterwards when reflecting on your time in that swing, you couldn’t quite remember everything that happened, in fact, you could barely remember the details, what you could recall however was the feeling and the emotions that were invoked by being so submissive and bending to his will but people so completely loved and filled at the same time.

Levi also came back from second, he was pleased to see that the butt plug was still inside you and tugged the tail like Hanji had before giving you a spank on your behind. When you moaned he grabbed your jaw, his face inches from yours, “Did you like that sweetheart?” Now you were sure he’d wanted to use the word brat instead of sweetheart, but considering this was your first time with them you guessed he wanted to keep it a little less intimidating.

Despite what he’d said earlier about leaving it to a later date, he asked if it would be okay to try anal. As nervous as you were you knew Levi would take great care to ensure you were well prepared so you agreed. You had been right, there was a lot of massaging and him using several fingers, gently scissoring and occasionally using his tongue on you. When he fucked your ass he was slow at first, kissing you as he went, but soon he got lost in the rhythm and pleasure of it as he increased his speed and let out more animalistic moans. It hurt, you couldn’t deny it, but it also felt good. People often said there could be a fine line between pain and pleasure didn’t they. When Levi finished and pulled out he was rather red faced. He pressed a kiss to one of your cheeks, “I’m sorry I think I hurt you,” his voice sounded so despondent like he was truly disappointed in himself, “It won’t happen again,” he said. You grabbed hold of his face and kissed him hungrily, “I don’t give a shit Levi, you felt so good, you feel so good, I…” God you wanted to cum again, you were writhing on the bed and rutting against his thigh.

Levi pulled at the collar, “Come ride my thigh,” he instructed.

Wet as you were you were easily able to slide up and down his thick thighs. They were far larger than you’d expected and so well toned.

“I want you to ride yourself to orgasm,” he instructed. Your lips were trembling, you really weren’t sure you’d be able to but what you knew is that you’d give it everything you had to try and do it for him.

A while later you lay comfortably numb, perfectly exhausted and in a dream-like haze. Everything in the past few hours had blurred into one, all you knew for certain was that you were safe and that the pleasure you’d experienced was nothing like anyone had shown you before.

But now as you lay on the couch a shiver ran up your spine, without the warmth of hands on you or bodies pressed against you, with no kisses, it didn’t take long for the night air to make your nipples to become erect and goosebumps to appear on your arms.

You shuddered and huddled into yourself, bringing your knees up into your chest. You knew you should get up to clean yourself up, but Captain Levi had instructed you not to move and besides you had no doubt that the others would take delight in cleaning you and taking care of you.

You heard the door open but closed your eyes so that whoever entered, it would be a surprise.

A soft hand cupped your chin, “Y/N look at you, so tired out, you’ve done so well.”

You recognised Erwin’s voice immediately and opened your eyes, “Did I make you proud?” You asked feebly.

Erwin hummed in response, “Yes you were a very good girl weren’t you?”

You nodded, “Yes, anything for you.”

“How many times did they make you cum?” He asked as he stroked your hair.

“I….” you tried to think about it but your mind was a blank, could you really not recall how many times you’d reached orgasm? “7 I think….”

Erwin pressed a soft kiss to your lips, “Hmm good, but I don’t doubt you could handle more?” He asked as he pulled away. You nodded limply.

You expected him to take you there and add to the mixture of cum that was trickling between your thighs, but you were surprised when he bent down and picked you up in a fireman’s lift and threw you over his shoulder.

Your cheeks burnt with humiliation but you knew Erwin wasn’t capable of hurting you, even though you felt embarrassed, the anticipation of what he’d do to you caused tremendous excitement.

He placed you down in the bathroom, “Toilet,” he stated matter of factly.

“W’what?” you stammered.

“Use it,” he commanded.

You blushed furiously as Commander Erwin stood over you, arms folded as you looked back at the toilet and then back at him. He couldn’t be serious right?

“You must be so full of cum now, practically full, look how it’s dripping down your thighs. You really are a mess. Do you expect me to fuck you when you’re so full of the ecstasy of others? Go and sit down.”

This time you didn’t argue, there was something absurdly hot about this situation you mused as you walked to the toilet and sat down. Thought you would never admit that to Erwin or anyone else for that matter. Were they all treated this way when they joined? From what you heard it started with Erwin and Mike dating back when they were cadets, two friends fooling around with one another then slowly realising they were in love.

Regardless of how you felt about the situation, your cheeks still burnt with shame and you closed your eyes trying to think of something else to overcome the embarrassment of having to pee in front of him. You cursed under your breath, truth be told you had needed the bathroom for a while but now you were being instructed to go your body was refusing.

“Look at me,” Erwin said.

Horror as your eyes opened and you stared at him, it felt as if you had stage fright. You were pretty desperate to pee but with him watching you, you really weren’t sure you’d be able to go.

“Come on, you can do it for daddy can’t you? Or do I have to turn on a tap?”

“N-noo..” you stammered. Maybe it was the fear of letting him down, but hearing the disappointment in his voice was all you needed to finally release. You let out a soft moan as you did so and as the water splashed in the basin you saw Erwin smile ever so slightly. Was he getting off on this? Every part of you wanted to say, “Pervert,” out loud, but you didn’t know him well enough, it was the kind of think Levi would say without a second thought but you would have to earn your place.

When you’d finished peeing and went to wipe, Erwin interjected and insisted on cleaning you himself. He inspected the tissue, cum and a little bit of blood that must have been from when Levi fucked your ass.

You turned away horrified wishing the ground would swallow you up to put an end to the inspection.

“Poor thing,” Erwin said as he kissed you.

“Come,” you followed him without a sound and entered his bedroom. There was a steel bathtub, steam rose from the hot water within, it looked incredibly inviting.

“This is for you,” he said.

You looked back at him wondering if it was a trick, “Go on,” he said, “I want you to relax and freshen up, no point having such a dirty girl in my clean bed.”

You nodded, and he helped you into the bathtub. As you sunk in and the water rose to your breasts you let out a contended hum.

“Tell me y/n, what if I were to say that I would scrub you all over, wash and brush your hair and treat you like the darling you are, but first you have to put on a little show for me?”

You gulped, “My favourite pet is the other side of the door, what if I were to invite him in for a little fun, what would you say?”

You nodded keenly, “Yes,” the thought of putting on a show for Erwin made you wet instantly.

“Yes what?”

“Daddy…”

Levi stepped into the room, he was still naked, though he’d had a chance to clean up.

He walked in silently and climbed into the bathtub opposite you, he pulled you gently into his arms and cradled you. His kisses were completely different to before, they were soft and tender without a trace of desperation, rather, they seemed tinted with love.

His hands gently scratched at your back as you wound your hands through his hair and entwined them. He peppered your cheek and collarbone with kisses, “You’re beautiful.”

You heard the unfastening of a belt and turned to see Erwin sat on a chair, legs spread as he pulled his cock from his trousers and slowly started to rub himself. His face was the picture of innocence and bliss. The blonde could have been an angel and in that moment you saw something you hadn’t seen in him before, desire and passion outside of work, you saw human emotion and feeling.

“Now,” Erwin said as he stared at the two of you. What you’d expected him to say was to fuck, you’d expected his tone to be harsh and vulgar, what you weren’t expecting was what happened.

“Make love like no one else is here, make love to her Levi like there’s no one else in the world.”

And Levi did just that, the water sloshed over the tub onto the wooden floor as he pulled you onto his lap and slowly lowered you onto his hard member. You moved slowly, Levi’s hands on your hips helping you to raised and lower yourself onto him, his own body craning to meet yours, kissing into your neck, your shoulders, collarbones, muttering words of love and adoration. The two of you remained embraced and kissing tenderly as you slowly built up to orgasm.

As he pulled out of you you looked down and watched small trails of cum spill into the water. Pearls of ivory, a vision of ecstasy. He kissed you once more and slowly you got off his lap and sat back down at the opposite side of the bed, admiring the heat in Levi’s cheeks.

Erwin helped Levi to climb out of the bath, wrapping him in a fluffy white robe.

“Good boy Levi, you may leave us now. Return with the others in an hour.”

Levi bowed, “Yes Sir,” and left the two of you alone once again.

Erwin then turned his attention to you, he had a fluffy towel ready for you and when you stepped out of the bathtub he took care to dry every part of you from your arms down to your feet. He took the towel away and returned with body lotion which he applied liberally to your body and limbs, it smelt of vanilla and oats. He lay you on his bed with such care, the sheets were clean and made of fresh cotton. The room smelt of linen and fresh spring flowers. He blew out most of the candles so there was only one lit by the side of his bed.

“Is this what you wanted?” He asked as he climbed into bed beside you.

You bit your lip in reply and nodded, “Yes Commander.” The bed was massive, larger than any bed you’d ever seen, you guessed Erwin had to get it especially made for him. You had been wondering until that moment whether the 6 of them ever spent the night together and if so how that would work, now you knew.

“This kinda set up doesn’t work for everyone, but it works for us and if you think it could work for you too then you are most welcome.”

You nodded eagerly, no one had ever made you feel so loved and welcomed, you no longer dreaded waking up in the morning if you had this to look forward to. You realised that you could be happy.

As Erwin slid into you your eyes screwed shut, his length barely fit inside you. He literally took your breath away and for a moment you forgot how to breathe as your eyes remained closed you tried to adjust yourself a little to accommodate for his large member.

“Y/N,” Erwin’s voice was soft as he spoke to you now.

Your eyes opened, you knew they were glistening now with tears.

“Breathe for me,” Erwin said, he stroked your cheek.

You bit your lip and nodded, after everything you’d already been through that evening you could do this, you managed to take Mike for goodness sake and he was the largest, so why was this so difficult? Perhaps you were tired or it was the anticipation of pleasing the Commander which made you less able to relax in the same way you had around the others.

You tried to follow Erwin’s instructions and breathe for him, looking into his eyes for reassuring. He moved slowly into you at first so you could feel every centimetre, he continued to check you were okay, his words worked as you felt yourself relax. The less tense you became the easier it was for him to slide himself into you, though you had the feeling there was more of him to come. His hands were more gently with you than you thought they would be, fondling your breasts and gently pinching your nipples, when his hand went between your legs he stroked so gently you could barely feel it but when it did it was like small sparks of electricity that went up your spine.

Your legs wrapped round his waist, arms clinging tightly to him as he increased his speed and pounded you into the mattress.

Erwin moved you, bent your limbs to access a deeper part of you. He pounded deeper into you, you were sure you’d pass out. While Mike had the biggest dick, it was the way Erwin fucked you that was making you lose your mind.

When he came deep inside you it was with a low guttural moan, his forehead pressed against yours, his chest heavy and breathing fast. When he pulled out for a moment you thought that was it the sex may have been great but he wasn’t going to make you cum. He kissed down your body and then dove into you kissing and licking your thighs, his tongue probing into you, unperturbed by his own semen or it’s salty taste.

His grip on your thighs was like a vice, holding you in place and stopping you from squirming as he continued to pleasure you and bring you to a delicious orgasm. Though you felt at this point you may die from overstimulation, every part of your body was shaking, between your legs now almost numb from contact from others.

When he kissed you you could taste a salty sweet mixture of your fluids mixed together, his teeth nibbled at your lips and he whispered such soft praises, you were glad to know you’d done a good job on your first night.

For a while it was just the two of you cuddling in bed, Erwin stroked your hair and slowly you begun to talk about everyday mundane things. The kind of things people in a relationship talk about when no one is listening, he made you laugh, you told small, silly stories from childhood and he seemed to appreciate how relaxed you were with him.

You cuddled into Erwin’s chest for a while before you felt him stir underneath you, “The others will be here soon.”

“Do you all sleep together in this bed every night?”

You were sure you heard Erwin sigh a little, “No, we try to at least once a week but sometimes it isn’t easy. There are nights where we are all on our own, there are nights I spend just with Levi or just with Mike, nights where Mike and Nanaba are together and Hanji, Moblit and I stay in and have dinner together. It just works…there’s no schedule or timetable we just do what feels right at the time.”

You gave a contended sigh and nuzzled further into his chest, “That sounds so wonderful, like a Utopia of sorts.”

“It is, it works for us and I hope soon enough you will see how it works for you too,” he kissed your forehead.

You heard the door open, Levi ran in like an excited child first, followed by Hanji and Moblit. Nanaba and Mike entered last and shut the door behind them.

You lay on Erwin’s bed surrounded by the others, entwined and slow sleepy kisses passing from one to another. You got to sleep by Erwin’s side, behind you Mike spooned you, Nanaba slept at the bottom of the bed curled up on her side like a puppy. Levi clung to Erwin as if his life depended on it and maybe in a strange way it did.

Though this type of relationship wasn’t for everyone, you could already see how it worked and understood the deep and inner connection of each and every one. They were happy alone and more than capable of looking after themselves but maybe they wanted more and together they found this peaceful and trusting life. A life which you were more than happy to be a part of.

You woke up several times during the night, not accustomed to being so close to others when sleeping. You heard Mike’s gentle snore, his nose was buried in your hair and neck, it tickled but soft kind of tickles that sent warm trickles down your spine rather than shivers. Erwin looked like an angel when he was asleep, it was the only time you recalled seeing him appear peaceful.

Levi’s legs twitched as if he were a puppy having excitable dreams.

Hanji muttered in her sleep, something about titans and wanting to be their friends. Moblit was a fidgeter even in his sleep, Hanji you deduced, must be a very heavy sleeper not to be woken up by him constantly moving behind her. Nanaba didn’t snore but made small cute noises when she breathed out, almost like melodic hums.

You could do this forever and never want for anything. The titans, the fear you knew you all felt even if you seldom chose to share it, it was worth it for this.

“Hey y/n, okay you?” You heard Mike ask as he shifted and lifted his head.

“Hmmmm,” you replied sleepily. You turned over so you were facing Mike, your heads on the same pillow.

Mike stroked your hair, “I’m fine, just thinking how lucky I am.”

In the moonlight you could just make out his smile, “You’ll always be safe with us,” he said and pressed a soft kiss to your lips. When you parted you nuzzled into him, his large arms wrapping round you and pulling you close so you could hear his heartbeat. Behind you Erwin turned and now spooned you.

Nanaba too woke up, she crawled up the bed so she was laying half on top of you and half on top of Mike, “Can I join?” She asked innocently.

Oh yes, this was one of the best decisions you’d ever made.

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viralhottopics · 8 years

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‘Are You The One?’ Recap: Hi My Name Is Tyranny And Im An Alcoholic

Hello everyone. I would like to thank my loyal followers for questioning my whereabouts on Twitter. I was actually on vacation, because Im not poor. Sorry, but watching these morons was just not a fucking option. I was zen AF and I dont need Carolinas crocodile tears ruining it, k thx.

ANYWAYS, so onto the episode. It was kind of eh, Im going to be honest. If youre looking for another reason to be annoyed by Giannas existence though, then it def delivered.

AFTER THE MATCH CEREMONY

They are all pumped about getting four beams. In fact, if you took a shot for every time someone said four fucking beams youd need to get stomach pumped four fucking times.

Tyranny is like Ossssssssssssssssvaldo is my match. Honestly can we just cut the accent though? Hes from Chicago for gods sake, not Italy.

Oswaldo is not so sure. Hes like she could be my match! Or she isnt! Yeah, thats pretty much how life works, actually.

Also, can we acknowledge the giant-ass drink Tee has the whole time? That cup is actually my favorite cast member this season.

Carolina and Hayden start having a pillow fight because FOUR FUCKING BEAMS, AMIRIGHT?

Now Carolina is very suddenly into Hayden. Carolinas emotions give me whiplash. Betsy DeVos nomination was more certain than this bitch.

Gianna is like “OH NO. NOT TODAY. I DID NOT LEAVE THE SOUTHSIDE FOR THIS.” Shes like I’M GOING TO CONTINUE TO PURSUE THIS MAN WHO TREATS ME SO WELL. Even though they are a confirmed no match. Makes total sense.

So you unfriend-zoned him to cock block him? Seems v fair. So when you go to sleep, do you leave Haydens balls under your pillow or on your nightstand? Let me know.

*Starts Twitter Poll* Is Gianna hot? Yes or No?

Tyler apologizes to Taylor and is like “I have no excuse for being the ‘big bad wolf’ in this.” So youre eating peoples grandmas now? Very Hannibal Lecter-chic. Not sure Tyler understands that hes referencing a fairytale, but hes pretty so well overlook it.

Hes like these girls are all over me wah, life is hard.

TAYLOR: Im mad *looks at Tylers beautiful face* but Im not like, thatttt mad

Hes like Im not that guy, you know that! Shes like,

TYLER: I want to dump Shannon and date you

EVERYONE AT HOME:

Gianna goes to have a talk with Hayden, which she announces for everyone to know. Shes from the Midwest, okay? Shes not used to this whole having brains thing, cut her some slack!

GIANNA: HEY CAMERA GUY IM GOING TO HAVE A TALK WITH HAYDEN ALSO GIANNA: were very low-key shhhh

Little Mike is like this is bullshit, they are not a match, they need to stop and its like SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK.

GIANNA: I dont want to stop you from doing something but stop fucking doing it. (Im not even making that up, thats an exact quote) HAYDEN: But I need to play the game GIANNA: Did I fucking stutter

So Hayden has relocated from friendzone island to being a little bitch island. Need a house warming gift, Hayden? Ill get you crowbar so you can pull your head out of your ass. Youre welcome.

Gianna and Hayden have sex, giving life to the newest Trump supporter Im sure. Carolina sees all of this and is like wtffffff. Shes like, totally in love with Hayden! Like, they spoke for a whole 10 minutes. Didnt that mean anything to him?

Andre is like “IF THEY FUCK THIS UP IM GOING TO BE PISSED” and Im like do it. Get mad. You wont. No balls.

Honestly, Gianna could probs take Andre in a fight. That girl should be a fuckin prison warden.

THE CHALLENGE

The challenge this week is for the dudes. The guys have to spin themselves and then go through an obstacle course. Then they have to shoot a basketball into the hoop of the girl they want to date. The person who shoots the third basketball in the hoop wins the date.

challenges sound like the hazing the gay frats do. Its all v weak.

The guys start the game and are falling all over the place. *plays Ed Sheeran*

Hayden is like, fuck it. Fuck this game. Idfc anymore, Im here for Gianna.

HAYDEN:I love Gianna

ME:

He decides to help Oswaldo win a date with Tee. See heres the thingI like Hayden, but I also think hes being very dumb. Its a hard spot for me rn. Really struggling.

Tee being proud of Oswaldo for winning is like Trump being proud of winning president. We all know he couldnt have won without Hayden/Russia.

Derrick and Joey are trying to win Rush Boobss date. Derrick wants to win because fuck Joey. Theyre shooting for legit five minutes. Seriously, Ive seen better shots from . When is the last time you played basketball? Third grade? Derricks like I played division I basketball! which sounds like an alternative fact to me.

Joey wins. So its Osvaldo/Tee and Joey/Rush Boobs.

Ryan tells them they are going to trapeze and Tee is like Im black, I shouldnt be in the air. How did you get to the Dominican Republic? Drive? Horseback? I didnt know your skin color made you less aerodynamic. I just saw and honestly, Im a fucking scientist now.

BACK AT THE HOUSE

Lets all agree that Tee is low-key alcoholic. Shes constantly sipping from that big-ass cup and it seems like they have a good connection. Could that be her match?

Eddie is talking to Alicia about how he is poor and shes like “LOL not me, cant relate to you peasant.” Eddie, you need to get your ass over to Kam where you fucking belong. Know your fucking place. Do not fuck this up for me, Eddie.

Tyler is trying to break up with Shannon and it is a train fucking wreck. Hes like I need to do the right thing and leave you. He actually stole the whole speech from Gabriella in .

REAL PICTURE OF TYLER:

Shannon is like “I feel dumb.” And she should, because she just got played. I feel bad for Shannon. Her voice makes me want to take a waltz off a bridge, but I do feel things, kind of.

Tylers like I didnt realize girls have feelings and get mad when you treat them poorly. Thats like saying I didnt know when you light shit on fire, it gets hot.

Meanwhile, Tee is very much trying to date rape Osvaldo. Its creepy tbh. If a guy was doing that to a girl on this show I would be dialing 911 by now. Tee, knock it off, it’s super gross.

They go to the boom boom room and literally boom boom because they break something. Oswaldo, way to not hold your ground.

Kam is oiling Eddie up and being goofy. I needed this.

Shes like I know Alicia and Eddy have a good friendship, Im not getting territorial, because this is a game show. I LOVE YOU KAM, I AM STARTING YOUR FAN CLUB. Shes so rational. Everyone be like her please.

THE DATE

Oswaldo is like this date will take our relationship to the next level, even though it already has gone to the next level. *wink, wink* I remember when I lost my virginity. We get it, you had sex.

They go to the trapeze place and Oswaldo is like Hopefully I dont break my neck. Thats a pretty reasonable goal.

They all are like surprisingly good at this. Even Tee, whose blackness surprisingly does not hinder her capabilities. Its a miracle.

Oswaldo and Tee are like being lovey-dovey because they fucked that one time. Hes like shes not trying to rape me and I like this side of her. I too am a big fan of the people who dont try and sexually assault me. Weird.

THE TRUTH BOOTH

Ryan comes in hot and asks about the no matches, aka Gianna and Hayden, still hooking up.

Giannas like HOW IS THIS OUR FAULT??? Uh, youre a confirmed no match and youre hooking up. I feel like Im taking crazy pills. Leave the dumb shit to Rush Boobs, please god.

The house is like, “ugh we hate you, lets just get this shit over with.” Thats how I felt with pledges in my sorority.

Tyranny and Oswaldo go to the truth booth because duh.

OSWALDO: Im excited to learn if were a match and really connect on a deeper level. TEE: Im tryna fuck.

Im stressed because Tee will def die of alcohol poisoning tonight if this doesnt work out. And what do you know, NO MATCH.

Tee was like I was falling in love with him. Shes crying. Hes crying. This is depressing. Did I accidentally sit on the remote and turn on ?

Oswaldo starts boxing while Andre is talking him down and all the guys hug him. Wow, I love the bromance. What I love more is that eventually one of them will try and fight another. #Drama

After everything, Tyler and Shannon are still hanging out. Whats Tylers favorite thing about Shannon? She isnt Taylor. Hes got high standards, ya know? #FourFuckingBeams

Taylor is like youre fucked up. And hes like why, because Im having a conversation?

Ugh Taylor, this paaaaains me to say, because I usually automatically side with the hot girl, but hes low-key right. You need to chill out and move on. Hes not worth it, dude. Hes just not.

Andre asks Taylor wtf shes doing with Tyler and Im like YAS KEEP THIS UP.

Andre is like actually, we like each other, Taylor. And shes like wait, yeah we do. WTF is this Jedi mind control shit Andre has.

ANDRE: *swinging coin back and forth* you are getting very sleepy.. and youre going to fuck me TAYLOR: *eyes glazed* yes, master

He says that she should be a Victorias Secret Model and honestly she should marry him just for that. Like thats compliment of the goddam century.

THE MATCHUP CEREMONY

Its the boys pick tonight. Please note that last time they blacked out harder than Tee does on any given weeknight.

Little Mike gets the ball rollin the wrong way and picks Kam.

Mikes like following our heart doesnt work. Hes like we should venture off, and though thats noble, maaaaaaybe not at the match ceremony. Thats like Michael Phelps being like LOOK FREESTYLE JUST DOESNT WORK right before the 4×100 relay.

Ozzy picks Hannah.

Oswaldo is up next and hes like “I GOTTA DO ME.” He picks Taylor.

Ryan asks Taylor how she feels about Tyler and shes like whos Tyler? Andre and her give each other looks and Im like OKAY YES IM HERE FOR THIS SHIT.

Ryans like Andre, do you wish you were with her and hes like Im practicing my patience. Whatever the fuck that means.

Oswaldo is like standing next to her like, lol just fuck me, right?

Andre picks Casandra.

Eddy picks Alicia and is like this is my homie.

KAM: I AM NOT WORRIED. ARE YOU WORRIED, BECAUSE I AM NOT WORRIED!!! *twitches*

Joey picks Rush boobs.

Derrick picks Gianna. Weird.

Tylers up and fucking moseys up to the front. Goddam hes like a walking Shakespeare playtragically beautiful.

Hes like Ryan, let me speak and Ryans like I didnt even say anything, but ok.

Tyler goes off about how he was painted as the villain and how he is innocent and how all this Taylor shit is fake news and the failing lamestream media is spreading false rumors!!! Sad!

Ryan asks Tyler who he likes more, Shannon or Taylor and Tyler picks Shannon.

RYAN: Do you think Tyler is your match? SHANNON: IDK RYAN: Is Taylor his match? SHANNON: IDK RYAN: Is the world round? SHANNON: IDK

Tylers talking about his breakup with Taylor and is like it sucks because you cant delete people in the real world. This is the first thing that I agree with him on. Dont worry Tyler, Ive watched . Well get to that point someday.

Michael picks KARI. Is it Carrie or KAAAAAARI? I have been saying KAAAAARI. Please DM some confirmation.

Hayden is next. Hayden tells the group that him and Gianna are affecting the game and they are going to stop screwing everyone over.

Gianna is like “WTF. WHO TOLD HIM HE COULD SPEAK? WHO LET HIM OUT OF HIS CAGE?” He picks Carolina. Hehe.

Jaylen and Tee are last. Tee is really bummed about Oswaldo and Ryan is like, “bitch its week four.”

These couples are random AF but idk Im drunk and just here to shit talk. Dont give that much of a fuck.

No blackout, so thats good. They get four beams again. Cant wait to hear them talk about it incessantly.