#took about an hour of contemplating to post this or not
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alectoperdita · 7 months ago
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i did my taxes, now someone reward me with some serotonin please!
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danidrabbles · 12 days ago
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Cardinal
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Pairing: Logan Howlett ("Worst" Wolverine) x f!reader
Rating: Explicit (for themes and smut).
Word count: 16.6k
Summary: At the edge of the world, someone from another keeps you from stepping off.
Tags/Warnings (Please, read the warnings!!): Post-Deadpool & Wolverine, female reader (female anatomy etc + 2 mentions of hair long enough to fall into your eyes), strangers-to-lovers, depression, suicidal ideations, suicide attempt and mentions thereof, addiction, drinking alcohol, drugs (mentioned not used), panic attacks, sobriety meetings, anxiety, recovery, co-dependency vibes, sprinkles of soulmateism, explicit smut (oral and unprotected PIV), happy ending (yay!!). If I forgot anything, please let me know!
Notes: Deadpool and Wolverine re-triggered my X-Men obsession and what started as a means to write some smut actually became this idea about two broken people who shouldn't even have met in the first place finding each other. There's a lot of me in this story, more than there's ever been I think. I'm sorry for this glimpse into my head, and I'm sorry if this isn't as Reader-insert as it should be, but... I'm not that sorry, you know. Huge thanks to @javier-pena , for not only reading this over and fixing so many embarrassing mistakes, but also for saying she'd read this even if it was 20k words and always believing in my abilities as a writer, even when I sometimes didn't.
If you want to read the smut as a standalone, you can! Just CTRL + F (or search in page) for 'Logan reaches for' and read away.
THE LOOKOUT
With closed eyes, you inhale the cool, December air, before looking down at your feet. Here, at the edge of the lookout, the grass has been trampled. You imagine friends taking bets on who dares get closest to the edge, lovers making memories, families taking pictures. It’s strangely soothing that maybe you’re not the first to stand here to do this. 
Far below your feet, the water laps at the rocks. The force of it depends on the weather and tonight it’s violent, with big splashes and crashing sounds. The wind tugs at your coat, pulling you towards the water as if to help you along, making you look up again as you hold your balance. In front of you, the line of the horizon is dark but visible – it would have been impossible to make out if the moon hadn’t been as bright as it is.
It’s like you’re looking at the edge of the world.
During the weeks that fall had made way for winter, you scoped the place out a couple times. The first time you stood at this cliff’s edge, the place it took you to mentally scared you so much that you got back into your car and broke down in tears. The next couple times, things became more and more serious, as your life crumbled around you, and your feelings numbed, and nothing seemed to matter anymore.
Something had crept in while you weren’t looking, settling somewhere behind your eyes and spreading out to make a home behind your ribs, slowly but surely changing you. And once you realized it, it was already too late. It had grown large, became jilted and jealous, like it wanted all of you. It pushed away everyone and everything you held dear, until it was just you and that… something.
Especially during the quiet of the night, the lookout became soothing, a strange sense of familiarity enveloping you each time you were here. It was addictive and pretty soon, it became a daily routine to visit. But lately it’s been losing its shine, your feelings here dulling and darkening too. You’re exhausted, fed up, tired of giving it more of you.
Today you want it to be your last time here. 
You’ve had countless hours to contemplate what it would be like, imagined – all but romanticised – how the cold water would paralyse your limbs if the impact wouldn't do the trick. You read somewhere that it’s apparently like falling asleep when the water finally fills your lungs. You’ll be gone, but the thing will be too.
The thought makes your eyes fill with tears, but not from fear. All you feel is relief, like it’s right, how it’s supposed to be. It makes you smile despite everything, and–
“Hey, stop!”
A voice behind you thunders through the silence and makes you shriek into the night, dirt toppling over the edge of the lookout below the shuffle of your foot. A string of curses follows, heavy footfalls behind you indicating that the intruder is approaching you.
“Fuck off!” you throw over your shoulder, your voice a roar with how it’s amplified by the wind. 
After, your throat closes up, fighting the angry tears over the fact that you can’t even fucking kill yourself in peace. Never have you seen anyone here at night, never. What you hate even more is how it breaks your momentum. The haze that was surrounding you is pierced, and your body’s baser instincts kick in. Adrenaline suddenly pumps through your veins, making your legs tremble, your heart hammer, your body scream for you to step back from where you’re standing. Your anger, however, has you nailed to the floor. 
You almost miss the much softer, “Hey,” as a man steps into your peripheral vision. You pretend like you don’t hear him, or see him – you simply pretend he isn’t there, focussing on getting back into your previous mindset. 
But then he takes his hands out of his pockets.
“Don’t fucking touch me,” you warn, hating how your voice comes out trembling – weak.
“Easy.” He holds his hands up in surrender. “Wasn’t planning on it.”
You stand there together for what feels like hours. You will yourself to not let it affect you, setting your jaw to keep your teeth from clattering on account of the cold, allow the wind to blow your hair into your eyes without brushing it away. Even when it begins to rain, you don’t move, don’t blink even once more than you need to. From the corner of your eye you watch the man shove his hands back in the pockets of the brown leather jacket he’s wearing, and you quietly celebrate that your surroundings are fazing him more than they are you.
“You know–” he begins.
“I’m not really looking for a conversation.”
“Me neither,” he immediately counters, suddenly impatient, “so I’ll get right to it: You planning on jumping? Because if you think the water’s gonna be nice to you, you’ve got that wrong. You’ll end up in there feeling everything, that fall isn’t gonna do shit.”
Having expected a gentle approach, his bluntness and his tone knock the wind out of you. You cock your jaw, the shame creeping up your body the first bit of warmth you’ve felt in a while. Your cold fingers ball to fists as you will yourself not to care. Yes, his words and the way he's shatteríng your expectations with them sting, but you don’t even know this guy–
“And there’s nothing fuckin’ peaceful about it, it’s just panic. Right before you go too far…” He raises a fist and holds it against the center of his chest, “...there’s this burning right here that’s hell.”
“And what makes you such an expert?” you finally spit out.
“Died like that a couple times,” he says without waiting a beat.
The casual statement of something so bizarre beats your resolve before you know it, your head turning in his direction. “‘A couple times’?”
“I, uh…” You watch him hesitate, the moonlight illuminating the tick of his jaw, the bob of his throat as he swallows, the way his chest falls as he sighs, “Let’s just say I can’t die.”
Before you can stop yourself, you snort at that. “That must fucking suck.”
He barks out a laugh, “Got that right.” It startles you when his head suddenly turns to you, when he looks you in the eye for the first time. “But trust me, being down there isn’t much better.”
There’s something in the way he looks at you that makes you waver. You can’t really place it, or decipher why it makes you want to open up to him. Maybe it’s because you’re freezing and it’s your body betraying you, tricking you into moving so you can generate some warmth, moving your lips to keep them from going blue. Or maybe it’s simply because he’s a stranger and it’s so much easier to be honest when there are no consequences.
“Things just feel so…,” you begin, voice shaky. Every possible way to end the sentence crosses your mind, seemingly all wrong, before you settle on what’s closest to how you feel, “endless.”
To your relief, he doesn’t say anything. Doesn’t tell you to give it time that it will get better, or any of the other bullshit you’ve heard from all the other people that had been in your life and left a long time ago. You do find something else in the shift in his eyes, something you haven’t encountered before.
Understanding.
It might be worse. If anything, it’s overwhelming, making your eyes dart away from his as you sniff. 
The wind still tugs at you, the waves still hit the rocks, but your moment seems to have passed. It’s a sobering conclusion, a twisted version of wrong place, wrong time. Or maybe it was him who was at the wrong place at the wrong time. Either way, the outcome is the same.
You take a step back, and another, but it takes considerable effort; you hadn’t taken your numb legs into consideration. You stumble, falling back on the dewy, cold grass, not quick enough to catch yourself on your hands. With a groan, you move to sit upright.
“Shit. Hey, you still with me?” The stranger kneels next to you, fingers lifting your chin to look into your eyes. “Jesus, you’re fucking freezing.”
“No s-sh-hit,” you retort.
He sighs, offering you a hand so he can pull you up. “C’mon, let's get you warmed up.”
– – – – –
Logan.
That’s his name. 
It’s how he introduced himself, anyway, after he suggested you follow him. To his credit, he did offer to drive you, but you didn’t want to leave your car in the parking lot of the lookout. Logan waited 15 minutes for you while you put the blowers on the highest, warmest setting and waited for the feeling to return to your limbs. After, his brown truck led the way here – here being some hole in the wall, 24 hour diner. You could have not followed, but the drive was kind of mesmerizing; the night seemed darker than usual, and Logan’s tail lights served as a lighthouse.
Outside, the diner is all Christmas lights and flashing signs, but the interior is like something straight out of Twin Peaks; booths to the left, red barstools to the right, a girl that looks too pretty and too young to be here standing behind the counter. There were two other patrons you spotted along the way as Logan led you to one of the back booths. Once seated, Logan studied the pamphlets–or pretended to, more like, because as soon as the waitress came up he ordered two whiskeys and nothing else.
Between then and now, as you nursed your drink sip by careful sip, you hadn’t learned much more about him other than that he could knock back a glass of whiskey like he got paid to do so. And in truth, you like it this way; preferring silent company, the droning of the machinery behind the counter and the quiet hum of a song on the jukebox next to the entrance. The white noise helps to distract from the white noise in your head. Settling back into the leather cushions of the booth, you let some warmth seep back into your body. Opposite you, Logan does the same. 
Some moments after you finish your drink, one of the waitresses walks up to your booth to ask you about a refill, like she’s asked Logan twice now. You’re handing her the glass when Logan says, “She’s had enough.”
Your head whips from her to him. “Excuse me?”
He doesn’t say anything, and from the corner of your eye, you see the girl leave. With your glass. Logan’s is on his lips, his eyes observing you over the rim, looking at you like he– Dammit. You sigh deeply, a sense of anger filling you. You don’t need this, least of all from him. When you stand from the booth, those eyes follow you, making you voice your observations,
“Quit pitying me, Logan.”
“I’m not,” he says before taking another sip. “You still have to drive.”
You quirk an eyebrow at him. “And you don’t?”
Logan shrugs. “It’s different for me.”
Anger is still prevalent in your voice when you ask, “Well, let me guess, it’s another case of ‘I died like that a couple times’?” 
He hums.
“And how does that work?”
“Regenerative ability,” he sighs. Another sip before he elaborates, “X-Gene.” 
The admission makes you plop back down in your seat. Well, that explains things – he’s a mutant. You’re not familiar with that world, but you know enough to know it meant that. It isn’t like you couldn’t have deduced it before, but truthfully, you kind of thought he was bullshiting you as part of some tactic. Now, his actions and words make more sense: He really knows what it’s like to... That’s why he had that look on his face. Suddenly, you see him in a different light–
“Now who’s pitying who, hmm?” Logan asks, giving you a thin-lipped smile that doesn't reach his eyes as he sets his glass down on the table.
“I’m not, I’m just… processing. So this...” you lift his glass, swirl the contents around, “...doesn’t even affect you?”
“It does. For a few seconds.” He plucks the glass back from your hand, and throws the whiskey back with one gulp. His pupils dilate, pushing the hazel of his irises out until his eyes are almost black for a second, two… before going back to normal. “But if I chugged the bottle, I’d pass out.”
“Well, so would I,” you say with a chuckle. “So maybe we’re not that different after all.”
Just as the corner of his mouth lifts, your smile falls, because… it isn’t true; you’re very different. You’re pretty sure you don’t have what it takes to do what he did tonight. To care enough to do it. To sit with a stranger and hear them bitch and moan about being denied a drink. A feeling creeps up on you, sticky and uncomfortable, like you’ve overstayed your welcome—burdened him.
“I should head home,” you say, standing again.
Lightning fast, Logan’s hand shoots out to close around your wrist. “That really where you’re going?”
“Yes,” you reply. When you pull your hand back, he doesn’t let up. You fish your car key out of your pocket with your free hand, voice tighter when you say, “Let me go.”
“Just promise me something,” he says, eyes as dark as they’d been earlier, yet his drink has gone untouched since. “Don’t go back there again.”
“Not making promises I can’t keep,” you say, giving him a wry smile. “To strangers, but least of all to myself.”
He sighs, and lets you pull yourself from his hold.
THE CRAVING
New Years comes and goes, and you quickly discover that it was foolish superstition to think that it might change how you feel.
You find yourself in some club, a drink in each hand. You hate to admit it, but Logan’s words scared you out of your original idea and the only time you can bear to think of how to move on from it is when alcohol soothes the embarrassing grief of your shattered, macabre fantasy. It’s not a good way to deal with things, but it works.
There’s a part of you that welcomes feeling anything at all, but that… something inside you is busy trying to squash it. 
It’s getting somewhere, because you have no idea how much you’ve already had to drink, but you’re buzzing pleasantly. Adding to it, you knock both drinks back, slamming the glasses on the bar before spinning around and facing the crowd of dancing bodies. The music sucks, the dance floor is cramped, you’re tired… The truth is that you’re too old for this, but it’s easy to escape here, surrounded by strangers. You clumsily drag the back of your hand over your wet mouth, push your sweaty hair from your eyes, and join them.
The past couple weeks, you found yourself craving something. Contact. And here is where you can get your fill; a hand on your waist, lips on your ear, the music too loud and yourself too drunk to even comprehend what’s being said, but never more. You want them to get close, but never too close.
After some time – could be an hour, could be 10 minutes – you make your way to the bathroom. It’s quieter here, the dulled thump of the music making the time you spend there feel slow and syrupy. 
When you exit the stall, you bump into someone.
It’s a man. The dark hood over his head obscures his eyes, but you can’t help but think he’s looking right at you when a bright, almost unnatural grin appears on his face. It draws you in like a magnet, more so when he says, “Need something to take the edge off?” 
Curiously, you watch as he opens his palm, long fingers unfurling slowly until they reveal a small plastic bag in his hand. 
“First time’s on the house.”
You have no idea what it is exactly, but your eyes widen. This is new territory for you, and all the possibilities it opens up are suddenly invading your mind. As if on auto-pilot, you reach for the place where you keep your money, the sound of the door opening completely lost on you.
A hand closes around your bicep, pulling you aside with a quick yank of an arm.
“She isn’t interested, pal.” 
It’s another man, who effortlessly tucks you half behind him. Before you can protest beyond an indignant huff, there’s a sound, like a sword being unsheathed, and you catch a flash of red, and of knives. Frowning, you try to get a better look, but your view is obscured by the man’s shoulder. The hooded man seems undeterred, regarding the weapons with the same sickening grin, before leaving the bathroom, muttering something that you don’t understand on the way out. The sword sound returns, the man twists around, and–
“Logan?” you slur in disbelief. 
Logan doesn’t reply, instead takes hold of your arm again, making you follow him out of the bathroom. There he stops the two of you to murmur something to a woman wearing the same clothes as him, before tugging you along again. You’re stumbling after him on account of his pace and the iron grip he has on you as he leads you to the back door. He pushes it open with enough force to make the hinges creak, a gust of wind blowing in your face. It’s a contrast to go from the crowded, sweaty club to the silent, cold back-alley where tall brick walls and employee cars cage you in. You shake your arm and Logan’s grip loosens – another and he lets you go.
“How did you even find–” You cut yourself off, eyes widening, “Oh, my god, are you following me?”
Logan scoffs, narrowing his eyes. “Oh, please, do you think I have time to follow you around all day?”
“You’re here, aren’t you? You and your fucking…,” you gesture wildly into the air at him, “savior complex.”
“I work here,” he growls. When you give him a look, he adds, “It’s temporary. ‘Sides, me and my savior complex are the reason that creep isn’t selling god knows what to you in that bathroom right now!” His voice is a roar, echoing off the walls around you.
“Maybe I wanted that creep to sell god knows what to me in that bathroom,” you say, doing a poor impression of his voice, before turning and walking away from him.
Logan sighs. “Where are you going?”
“I’m leaving.”
“And then what, huh?”
“I don’t fucking know, Logan,” you say, twisting around to face him again, arms spread out by your side. “Figure out a new way out of this.”
“Yeah? Third time’s the charm?”
“Why do you even care, huh? You don’t even know me,” you say. Almost immediately, you let out a bitter laugh as your own words hit your ears, a sad realization dawning on you. “But I guess that makes two of us.”
It’s not like you expected him to, but he doesn’t answer.
“You know I used to like myself? I used to smile, I used to have friends, I used to be more sober than drunk. But this feeling, it takes… everything.” You raise a fist, hold it to the center of your chest. “It takes everything I love, pushes away everyone I love, including myself. It eats me up, and wants more and more, until I’m something I’m not and until I’m so far away from that version of myself, my old self, that it feels easier to just fucking–” you pause with a wet gasp for air.
“Destroy yourself,” Logan finishes for you.
Your chest heaves, an unshed tear clings to your lash line. “Exactly.”
He takes a step closer to you. “Let me take you home,” he says, voice gentle. 
You should hate the implications of that gentleness, but you don’t. In your drunk state of mind, it’s easier to admit it’s nice that someone understands, that someone’s there to stop you from going too far… 
Tomorrow, when some of your pragmatism returns, you’ll deny this embarrassing thought ever occurred; if relying on other people worked, it would have worked a long time ago, and you wouldn’t be standing here with him. If you’re lucky, you might even forget this entirely, and wake up with a hangover that you’ll enjoy a little too much because it feels like a punishment–
“What about your job?” you ask with a sniff.
Logan’s palm finds the space between your shoulder blades with a gentle push, the warmth of it seeping in through your clothes, and he leads you to his truck. “They’ll manage without me.”
– – – – –
When you wake, your world is tilted sideways, a blanket is pulled up to your chin and there's a pillow under your head. They’re not your own; the blanket is itchy and the pillow’s too small. When you try to move your legs, they stick uncomfortably to the material below them, and you realize you’re on a leather couch. You squint at the light that comes in from a window across from you–
“Mornin’, sunshine.”
The voice startles you, eyes shifting to focus on the source: A man lying on his front on the floor, chin in his hands as he kicks his feet back and forth in the air. 
“Wish I could say it’s a pleasure, but it hasn’t been very pleasurable. You’ve been barfing up the place since the moment you stepped inside. Kept poor Al up all night. Her ears are sensitive,” he adds with a whisper. “But don’t worry, she left about an hour ago.”
“Who are you?” you slur, blinking against the light.
“Logan.” He sighs when you frown. “I know, not how you remember. This is what I look like during the day; blessed with incredible good looks at night and, well,” he gestures at his face that’s covered in scars, "this, during the day. Bit of a reverse Princess Fiona situation–”
“Cut it out, Wade,” comes the sharp protest from next to you. With considerable effort, you turn your head and see the actual Logan, slumped back in a recliner next to the couch, rubbing some sleep out of his eyes while motioning for the other man to go.
“I’ll let you two talk.” Wade winks.
Logan stands when Wade does, walking from your field of view. Your head is scrambling to catch up, trying to piece together what happened last night, but only coming up with bits and pieces.
“How are you feeling?” Logan asks as he makes his way back to you, handing you a glass of water.
You flinch when the front door closes behind Wade with a bang, before taking the glass from Logan and taking a few thankful sips. “Like shit.”
“Yeah,” is all he says as he sits back down.
“What–”
“You fell asleep in the car. Didn’t know where to take you, figured the couch was the safest place.”
“Oh…,” you say, voice small. 
You try not to think about being so wasted that you had to be carried out of Logan’s car, or about what Wade said earlier about the things that happened as soon as you stepped inside the apartment. During your silence, Logan’s fingers fiddle with the armrest, before his hand balls into a fist, and it unlocks something in your hazy memory.
“I have the weirdest memory of you having… a sword?”
You watch as Logan’s lips purse in amusement. His tongue rolls around in his mouth, seemingly contemplating something, before saying, “You probably saw these.” He holds up his fist, flexing his forearm before three blades shoot from between his knuckles like claws, accompanied by a shing!
“Jesus fucking Christ,” you startle, spilling some water on your blanket. Your head spins with your hangover and the bizarity of the situation. If it didn’t sound so much like how it did in your memory, you might think you were still drunk. 
There’s so many things you want to ask, your intrigue almost winning out over your hangover until the sharp start of a headache gives you pause. Instead, you take another sip of water before rubbing your temple.
“It’s a story for another time,” Logan says, like he can read your mind, and you want to ask him that, too. His claws retreat, the cuts they leave between his knuckles immediately smoothing over until they’re gone. “I gotta go check if I still have a job.”
The words make you feel warm all over, the memory of your back-alley conversation coming back in full force. The thought of the things you admitted to him and that you put him in the position that he had to risk his job for you make you feel even warmer, your gaze no doubt laced with embarrassment and worry when you look at him.
“‘S not your fault,” Logan assures, standing and fishing his car key from the pocket of his jeans. “You don’t have to rush but um, make sure you close the door behind you on the way out. Gets jammed sometimes.”
“Yeah, okay,” you say, watching as he makes his way to the front door. 
He takes a final glance at you over his shoulder, then leaves, accompanied by a bang.
THE PUZZLE
It takes you a little over a week to muster up the courage to go back. Admittedly, your courage is aided by another, foreign feeling. You don’t have a name for it yet, or maybe you’re afraid to call it what it is, but somewhere along the week, you became consumed with the thought that feeling like you did wasn’t all there was. That there is something beyond this. 
Perhaps foreign wasn’t the right way to describe it, because it is something you’ve felt before – it’s just been long dormant. The last time, it lasted about a month before it all came crashing down, and you swore you wouldn’t fall for it again, but you can’t help it. The feeling’s too sweet, and the idea that there’s still some baser instinct willing you to keep fighting for yourself makes you feel like the sun is shining on you. 
So yeah, maybe you’re just having one of your good weeks, where the thing sleeps – quiet while its presence still simmers. But you figured now’s your chance to take advantage of its unguarded moment.
Sneaking into the building is surprisingly easy. It helps that it isn’t anything fancy. You wanted to forego the humiliation of ringing the bell and him not letting you in, but standing in front of the door now, panting after climbing three flights of stairs, you don’t know if this is much better. 
Just when you’re about to knock, the door swings open. In the opening, Logan has one arm in his jacket, head twisted to watch the other that’s caught halfway in the sleeve. It takes him almost bumping into you to realize your presence. “Shit, sorry.” He steadies himself with a hand on your arm, the touch leaving you as fast as it appeared.
“Hi,” you breathe, taking a step back to give him a little more space.
He nods in greeting. “Brings you here?”
It takes you a moment, caught off guard by him skipping over pleasantries and cutting right to the chase, despite your best intentions; it’s not that he’s ever been any different in his interactions with you.
“I came by because I, um, owe you an apology, for my behavior at your workplace and for, you know…,” you trail off, gesturing at the door.
“Barfing up the place!” comes a shout from inside the apartment. 
Logan’s eyes close with a sigh, before he steps into the hallway with you and closes the door with a bang. 
“That,” you finish sheepishly. “I’m really sorry.”
He nods in acknowledgement.
“I also wanted to ask, um, if you want to come with me to get a coffee. To make it up to you.”
Logan just looks at you, the leather of his jacket creaking as he crosses his thick arms in front of his chest. He raises an eyebrow at you expectantly. You hate how he somehow can see right through you, how he makes you elaborate, and honest.
“I want to quit drinking,” you say, fiddling with the sleeve of your coat. “It doesn’t make me better, and when I don’t do it I finally feel a little… normal. Maybe coffee’s technically just as bad, but it’s the only thing that’s currently acting like… like a reverse gateway drink? And I feel like you’re the only person I know that might get that feeling of–”
“I do,” Logan cuts in, voice softer than before – assuring. His arms drop from where they’re crossed and he starts making his way to the stairs. “Let’s go.”
– – – – –
You don’t know this coffee place, and from the way he looks around and shifts around in a chair that might be a bit too small for him, neither does Logan. Main reason you picked it is because the booths remind you a little too much of a bar – and you like the tall windows. The coffee’s pretty decent.
“Did they fire you?” you ask, picking at a loose corner of one of the laminated menus before setting it back in its holder.
“Boss commended me for helping a customer, but not so much for leaving before my shift ended,” Logan replies. “Got off with a warning.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Said that already, and I accepted,” he says. When he takes a sip of the coffee, he winces. “No need to worry about it anymore, okay? I would do it again.”
You nod, folding your hands around the warm cup in front of you.
“But, um, Wade hasn’t shut up about… the incident.” There’s a different tone to his voice, like he’s trying to lighten the mood. “His words.”
“You know, I kind of get the feeling that Wade doesn’t shut up about a lot of things.” It comes out a little meaner than you intend, but it makes Logan laugh and finally slump back in his chair a little. 
“You’re a quick study.”
Offering him a short smile in return, you continue with the other real reason you came to see him, before you chicken out. “I also stopped by because I wanted to, uh… because I realized I never really… I never… I never thanked you, for um… And–”
With a shake of his head, Logan sits upright. “Y’don’t–”
To your horror, your eyes brim with tears, “Logan, I’m supposed to be dead–”
“So am I,” he counters. He lets the words hang between the two of you for a moment, until you look at him, before he continues, “I’ve been where you are. Past it, even.”
You don’t know what to say to that, if the lump in your throat will even permit you to speak, but it’s impossible to look away from him. Logan’s gaze is piercing, frown ever present, but it’s not from anger. Instead, it’s like he’s searching for something, the right thing, to say. The silence doesn’t bother you; if anything, it makes his words seem more genuine when he does speak,
“I had someone who was annoying enough to not give up on me when I could really use it. If getting a coffee with you that’s, frankly…,” he makes a face as he pauses, “a horrible excuse for a coffee, helps… I can do that. I want to do that.”
The corner of your mouth lifts as you blink away your tears. “Was it Wade?”
Logan lets out a chuckle, and it’s honest – fond. “Yeah.”
“Figured,” you say. “How did you meet him?”
Across from you, Logan stills. You swallow thickly, adjusting yourself in your chair. It’s an innocent question, but maybe it isn’t something he’d like to revisit right now. Logan’s mug squeaks when he grips it tighter, and he looks at you with something like defeat– 
It makes you deflate. This must be what you looked like the night you met…
There’s no way to have prepared for what he tells you next: That he came from another timeline about three months ago, that he and Wade saved this one from being destroyed and almost got killed in the process, that he has nothing to go back to after the death of his team, so he stayed here. 
There’s hesitation in it, like he isn’t telling you the whole story, though you don’t comment on it. He doesn’t owe you anything and you’re too busy putting all the pieces in the Logan-shaped puzzle in your mind together; his words and actions towards you are starting to make more and more sense.
“It’s a very brave thing the two of you did,” you say when he’s finished.
“Hmm, it was all Wade,” Logan muses. “He did it all for the people he cares about.”
“I’m sure you would have done the same if you were in his place.”
At that, he lets out a dry laugh with absolutely no joy behind it. “Do me a favor, don’t put me on a pedestal.”
You frown, but before you can comment, he stands. A knot forms in your stomach, worried you’ve offended him, but he clears up the uncertainty immediately.
“I gotta go but um, Wade’s friends–,” he stops himself, correcting, “our friends are coming over to watch a movie, next week, 7:30. I have no idea what crap they’re going to be watching but… it’s nice. It’ll be nice to be around good people.” Logan doesn’t wait for your answer, simply takes his wallet from his pocket and leaves enough money to cover the bill.
“Wait, no, I invited you,” you protest. “I should–”
“You can pay next time.” 
When you nod, he says his goodbyes with a jerk of his head and makes his way to the door.
– – – – –
You see Logan two more times for coffee that week. He never lets you pay.
THE PANTRY
“–but it’s the best one!” Wade protests, DVD in hand.
“They fly a car into space, Wade,” Laura sighs.
“Launched off a jet,” he corrects. Like it helps.
You cover your mouth with the back of your hand, hiding the smile that appears at everyone’s babbling. Unbeknownst to you, you had found yourself invited to a double feature night, with Wade as the self proclaimed DVDJ. The credits had barely started rolling on A Good Day To Die Hard, or Wade had another DVD at the ready. It was met with the same amount of enthusiasm as when he presented the first.
It hadn’t been easy to make yourself go to this tonight. On your way, you’d thought of turning around at almost every step. Of course, that was all before you knew it would be this fun, and that you’d be relieved you hadn’t canceled last minute. Even meeting everyone hadn’t been as bad as you feared. 
There’s Peter, Wade’s friend. Ellie, another one of Wade’s friends. Yukio, Ellie’s girlfriend. Laura, Logan’s daughter. Mary Puppins, Wade’s small, disgusting but adorable dog, who had greeted you with equal amounts saliva and enthusiasm, before falling asleep next to the TV, completely unbothered by the commotion. Unlike Althea, Logan and Wade’s blind roommate, who had taken one listen to the gaggle of voices and left. The elusive Vanessa, Wade’s ex-but-we-might-get-back-together you heard about a couple times, wasn’t there.
Logan had been right, it was nice to be surrounded by good people. Especially good people who were… unconventional. It made joining them less complicated, less performative, and as the evening progressed it made you a participant instead of a silent observer. Wade even called you, “good for the group dynamic,” and it made you beam with pride.
“Don’t they have like, rockets attached to the car?” Ellie questions, to which Yukio’s eyebrows knit together.
“Exactly!” Wade exclaims, mistaking her confusion for enthusiasm. “Citizen Kane wishes.”
There’s more grumbling from everyone when Wade pops the DVD into the player, and he grumbles something back about how Logan would back him up if he wasn’t in the bathroom because he, quote unquote, goes way back with some of these dudes.
You’re pretty sure he’s the only one who knows what he’s even talking about.
An empty bowl of popcorn rests in your lap, and as you put it on the table, you notice how sticky and greasy your fingers and palms are. When the opening credits begin to roll, you get up to wash your hands, assuring Wade he doesn’t need to pause the movie before you go.
The apartment’s small, so it isn’t far to the kitchen, but it’s nice to stretch your legs. You can still hear the sounds from movie night; tell-tale action movie music, comments of disbelief and Wade shutting them down. They’re more faint, though, more so when you turn the tap on and wash your hands.
Right as you’re finished, you hear a dull thud. You turn the water off, head tilted and at attention while you dry your hands. There’s another sound, like a muffled groan. It’s coming from the pantry, you realize, noting that the door is slightly ajar. There’s a shing! sound followed by a distressed grunt, and before you know it you’re walking over, wrapping your fingers around the door to pull it open–
You’re not sure what it was you were expecting, but it wasn’t this. Logan’s sitting on the floor, uncharacteristically small, curled up against one of the walls. His chest is heaving, shoulders all but going up to his ears with how he’s trying to draw in breaths. Next to him, his fist is balled against the hardwood, claws buried in the floor.
Fuck.
Dropping to your knees, you wedge yourself between his. “It’s okay, you’re having a panic attack,” you explain, your hands landing on his shoulders with a light shake. “You need to breathe. I’ll help you, just look at me.”
Logan’s head stays tipped down, a deep, rattling breath sailing from his mouth as he curls further in on himself.
“Hey!” you say sharply, cupping his jaw with two hands and tilting his face up, “Look at me.” 
Logan’s eyes are wet when they meet yours, moving frantically as they search your face, tears spilling over when he blinks. Something changes in his gaze, like he finally sees it’s you, and his bottom lip begins to tremble. His hand lifts from where it’s buried in the floor, clutching onto your wrist like a lifeline.
“Breathe,” you instruct, trying not to flinch at the sharp claws in front of you. He doesn’t catch on immediately, so you overdo the purse of your lips when you blow out a breath before exaggerating an inhale through your nose, showing him what to do. It starts off shaky, a fresh set of tears falling from Logan’s eyes as he does as you instruct, but after a couple of times you find a rhythm together. The silver between his knuckles slowly disappears. “There you go, good job. Keep going.”
You sit like that, until the wild shift of his eyes stops, his pulse steadies beneath your fingertips, and eventually his eyes close with a deep exhale. His grip on you loosens and you take it as your cue to let go of him, slumping back against the wall opposite him with a sigh of relief. The both of you catch your breath, sitting together in silence until Logan breaks it.
“Came outta nowhere… suddenly I was back there… letting them down.”
“It caught you off guard, it happens–”
“I let them get killed,” he says, voice raw. “They were like– They were my family, they trusted me to be there for them and I… I was too caught up in my own bullshit. I should have been with them, I should be dead with them.”
Logan’s tears still come, but the words almost sound reverent; as if saying them out loud just to punish himself with his own shortcomings is a balm. He’s talking about his team from there, you realize, and something clicks. All this time, you thought this was about him being unable to die due to his mutation, but it’s more than that. It’s shame, remorse, grief, survivor’s guilt, all wrapped into one.
It’s the final piece of your mind puzzle that makes his picture appear.
“How– How can I ever atone for that?” he asks. “How can I ever–”
“Logan, you can't change your past,” you interrupt carefully. “You made your choices and they made theirs, and you honored them by– by…stepping up to the task, by doing what you did with Wade.”
“What if it wasn’t enough?”
“What if it was?” you counter. Your hand finds his knee with a squeeze, before adding, “You did what they would have done. And now you… you need to allow yourself to honor their memory without feeling like you have to destroy yourself to do it. You deserve that.”
Logan blinks at you, eyes still glossy. He looks devastated yet calmer than before, like the emotion is still there, but displaced. For a good while, you sit with him like that while his sniffles lessen and his breathing returns to normal… until there’s a loud explosion coming from the living room. It’s followed by cheers and hollers, and you’re both suddenly reminded of where you are. 
“C’mon,” you say, patting Logan’s knee before using it as leverage to haul yourself up with a groan. You give him room by holding the door open for him. “Better get back before we miss the good stuff.”
Still on the floor, Logan exhales heavily. “Think this was the good stuff.”
– – – – –
Three weeks later, on your way to your third movie night, you catch Wade and Vanessa making out in the building hallway. 
It stops you dead in your tracks and makes for an awkward meeting with Wade’s mystery woman, who is beautiful but very direct when she asks you what the fuck you’re staring at. Wade certainly has a type when it comes to the company he keeps… He quickly shushes the situation, introducing the two of you, and it immediately makes Vanessa’s expression twist into recognition. 
“Nice to meet you,” she says, followed by an apologetic smile. 
You respond in kind. 
When Wade tugs at her jacket impatiently, they brush past you and make their way to the exit. “See you around!” she throws over her shoulder.
A grin forms on your lips, realizing what you just witnessed, and you race up the stairs. With Wade gone, you’re not sure if there will be a movie, but at least you have gossip to share with your friends.
THE MEETING
April flies by, rolls into May, and thing’s are… okay.
With some help, you find a therapist. It’s good, she’s good, but it’s difficult to be confronted with things that are painful, week after week, and to keep reminding yourself it’s all part of the process you’re going through.
Last week, after a particularly difficult session, you’d left her office being auto-piloted by dark feelings, like they knew exactly when to strike. You had turned corners and crossed streets, wandering as you stewed on everything you’d discussed –  like your mind was playing a constant loop of your most painful moments. It was a small miracle you had heard your phone, and that you had the presence of mind to thumb the green button.
You’d answered without saying a word.
“Got any plans?” Logan had asked on the other side of the line.
“No,” you’d replied, coming back to yourself a little bit at the sound of his voice.
“Al’s making her meatballs – she and Wade can’t agree on if they’re famous or infamous. Thought you might like to come. If it tastes like shit, we’ll order in.”
You’d hummed, managing to ask, “What time?”
It had stayed quiet on the other end, and that’s how you’d known he was onto you, could picture the pinch of his brows, his lips forming a thin line. For the first time, you welcomed it—wanted so badly to reach through the phone, shake his shoulders, ask for his help and accept it, like he had done with you weeks ago. 
“Sounds to me like now might be good.”
“Yeah,” you had agreed, the constricting tightness in your chest easing up. “Yeah, I’ll be there soon.” You’d released a shuddering breath, ear still pressed to the phone as you took in your surroundings before you auto-piloted yourself to a different destination. 
“Logan?”
“Still here.”
“Thank you for calling.”
“‘course. Get here soon, I’ll stay on the phone.”
The afternoon had ended with Logan and yourself allowing Althea to boss you around in the small apartment’s kitchen, rolling meatballs, sharing stories — Althea’s recollection of something that happened to her in her 20s that involved her stealing a police horse while wearing nothing but a thong, made you cry from laughing.
The meatballs were the best you ever had, though you couldn’t be sure if they actually were, or if it was just the taste of the moment that was better than anything had been that day. 
Sometime after dinner, Logan had nudged your shoulder to show you a little plastic chip. He flashed it at you long enough that you could read the words one month, before he pocketed it again. Then he suggested you come with him next week. 
“I thought it was bullshit too, but it helps,” he’d explained. “Figured I couldn’t continue to drink whatever that stuff is you call coffee to… avoid my problems.”
You contemplated his suggestion. Things were going well for you in that regard, but your therapist had also recommended you go to one of these things, even if it was just for the community aspect of it. It just made it so… official. Your problems, but most of all, your recovery. You weren’t good at keeping promises to yourself, and this felt like a big commitment. Not to mention the speeches and other people’s problems...
But as Logan told you more about it, the location, how it had been for him, you sensed something else between the lines: He wasn’t just asking for you, he was also asking for himself. Maybe… this was his way of telling you he needed some support. 
That’s how you find yourself inside a high school gymnasium a week later. It’s as gloomy as you expected. Slick floors, gray fold-out chairs set in neat rows, buzzing lights in a high ceiling, and a slightly raised podium with a whiteboard that reads a welcome message in capital letters. 
Unsure of what to do, you follow Logan as he weaves through the crowd to find a seat. As you do, it strikes you that there’s a pretty even distribution of people, with many genders, ages and lifestyles represented. Eventually you take a seat; not quite in the back, but definitely not in the front. 
The whole thing goes by in a blur, but where you expected to be overwhelmed, you feel… connected. Here you are, surrounded by people with different backgrounds, different lives, but all their stories have something you can relate to. Where you thought addiction was the common denominator, it’s actually the desire to turn your lives around that unites you the most.
“Before we end the night I want to circle back to last week, when we spoke about goals, or things we want to work towards,” says the woman leading the meeting – you’re ashamed to admit you already forgot her name. “Does anyone want to share something about that?”
It takes a lot to hide your surprise when Logan raises his hand. 
“Logan! Come on up!” She sounds as surprised as you feel, beckoning him to her.
The plastic chair he sits on creaks when he stands and his boots squeak against the shiny floor as he does as she asks. He looks so out of place on a podium; both larger than life behind the lectern and lost to the space of the stage. He clears his throat as he retrieves a paper from his pocket and unfolds it while his eyes scan the room until they land on yours. You give him a little nod of encouragement, and it kicks him into gear.
“Not good at this stuff, so I’m going to keep it brief,” he starts. 
It earns him a chuckle or two from the other attendees, and you can tell he doesn’t expect it when he looks up from his paper. Your hands clasp together with nerves as you watch him divide his weight from one leg to another, before focussing his gaze back down.
“My life has changed a lot over the past few months. For the first time in a long time, it’s not all bad. Coming here has been good. I’m starting to feel more like I did before–” 
He stops his monotonous droning with a frustrated sigh, stuffing the piece of paper in his pocket and sounding considerably more lively after. 
“I have people I care about again, and um, it scares me. ‘Cause I don’t want to let them down, and every day I feel like I will because of all of my… past shit.” He pauses and swallows hard before he continues, “They show me so much kindness and understanding, that… that even though it’s fucking hard, I want to be able to see myself the way they see me. And allow them to care about me without feeling like I… have to earn it all the time, without destroying myself to do it.” 
You exhale for what feels like the first time in an eternity.
“So, that’s what I’m currently working on.” Logan sighs. “That’s it. Thank you.”
A small applause follows, and you quickly unclasp your hands to join in.
Your palms hurt after.
– – – – –
“It was really nice, what you said in there,” you say, fingers caressing a little plastic chip of your own that you keep safe in your coat pocket. You haven’t felt proud of yourself in a while, but tonight you do.
The evening is nice, the setting sun bathing the city in hues of orange and pink. Your pace is slow and comfortable, your arm occasionally brushing Logan’s when you make room for all the other pedestrians. You didn’t plan on him walking you home, but he insisted and you enjoy the company – it makes you a little sad when you turn onto your street.
Logan scoffs in reply. 
“I’m being serious,” you say, knocking your elbow against his arm on purpose now. “It was nice for people to hear a guy like you say those things. I’m proud of you.”
You swear he blushes. “A guy like me, huh?” he asks, almost amused.
It’s your turn to scoff. “You know what I mean.” 
“A mutant?” He looks at you from the corner of his eye.
“No,” you say, because it’s not what you meant, but the hint of seriousness in his voice and the fact he’s not entirely wrong make you track back. “Well, maybe that, too, but I meant someone who looks like you, allowing themselves to be vulnerable. Sets a nice example.”
Logan doesn’t shoot your comments down like you expect. Instead, he seems to consider your words, maybe he even silently accepts the compliment. “Think you have some things to say that could set a nice example, too.”
“Maybe next time.”
During the comfortable silence that follows, you’re reminded of something you’ve been considering for weeks now. You hadn’t paid much attention to it since that night, but as you worked through the feelings that got you to that point, the question kept coming back.
“I’ve been wondering something,” you begin. “The night we met... What were you doing at the lookout?”
Logan glances at you, contemplating the question. “When I had just, um, gotten here, it wasn’t always easy to adjust, you know? So I went to all these places that I knew from back there, to ground myself, to see that things may be different, but that they’re not that different.”
“You went there on your side?”
He hums.
“By yourself?”
He hums again.
“Did you…” You hesitate to finish your sentence, both because you’re not sure if you have any right to ask and because you’ve reached your building. You stop walking, and Logan follows your lead. 
“No, no, no, I… I can’t explain it, it’s just one of those places I was always drawn to,” Logan says, shoving his hands in the pockets of his jeans with a shrug. His brows furrow suddenly, his mind seemingly lost in something before his eyes flick back to yours. “Think it took me coming over here to find reason in it.”
It’s a thought that’s equal parts sad and lovely. 
The silence that follows hangs between you, thick with something you can’t place, but Logan doesn’t look away from you, eyes scanning your face before they land back on yours. You can’t help thinking that maybe this is how he does it, and the question comes out before you can help it,
“Is mind reading part of the X-Gene thing?”
His eyes widen – amusement or surprise, you can’t say. “It can be.” 
“Can you do it?”
“No,” he says. “And it’s for the best, fucking hurts when you can’t control it.” Then the start of a smile begins to form on his lips. “‘sides, I don’t know if I would have a lot of… consideration for people’s boundaries.”
It makes you chuckle. “Right. Not to mention some minds are probably a lot – imagine reading Wade’s mind.”
“Hurts to even imagine,” Logan says, gesturing for you to be quiet as he winces, but a smile breaks through anyway. When your shared laughter dies down, he jerks his chin at the building behind you, “This your place?”
“Wha–?” Going home long forgotten in the moment, you glance over your shoulder. “Oh! Yes.”
“All right,” he nods. “See you next week?”
“Definitely,” you reply.
“Oh,” Logan says right before you turn around. “Bring coffee? You owe me.”
You make a face at him. “You don’t have to– I’ll get you something else, I know you don’t like it.”
“I like it when I drink it with you.”
It’s incredibly hard to hide your grin. “Okay, I’ll bring coffee. See you next week, Logan.”
“See you.” 
He lingers, watching you climb the steps, waiting until the door opens after you turn your key in the lock. It’s not until you close the door, when you can only make out his silhouette through the patterned glass window in it, that he walks off.
THE SUMMER
Walking back from a very successful job interview, you find yourself on your way to your friends with a big, plastic bottle of coke under your arm. It’s a warm feeling to know that you’ll soon have a job that suits you and that you have people to celebrate with; you look forward to seeing them and sharing this with them.
You’re invited inside with open arms, tight hugs, exclaimed praise and congratulations, and it makes you giddy, a feeling so foreign that you wish you could bottle it up right this instant. With a grin, you shake the Coca Cola bottle, before twisting the cap off. You let out an excited shout as you watch the foam shoot out from the top, bubbles and dark liquid pulsing down the neck of the bottle as cheers surround you.
It’s not champagne, but Althea grumbles about the soda ruining her floors, Wade gets mismatched glasses from the cupboard, and Logan clinks his glass to yours and tells you he’s proud of you.
It’s way better than champagne.
– – – – –
You’re in serious, desperate need of a new place… 
The August heat is relentless, and the entire building’s AC isn’t working. It’s with considerable effort that you manage to make your way to your friends’ place, the promise of a constant, cold stream of wind the only thing that keeps you going. But when the front door opens, it isn’t with the welcoming, cool waft of air you were hoping for. Instead, there’s no temperature change, only Wade in his underwear.
“No.” It’s a little embarrassing how you literally pout, but these are desperate times. “Here, too?”
“If it wasn’t this fucking hot I’d be offended by that greeting.” He sighs. “Come in.”
Slightly defeated, you shuffle past the threshold, while Wade lingers. Mary Puppins trots by, an ice-pack wrapped in a towel secured on her back, and you catch a glimpse of Logan exiting the bedroom. He’s in black shorts and a ribbed, sleeveless shirt, and with a desperate groan, he lets himself fall back into the recliner in the living room. 
“Tried everything, there’s no fixing that fucking thing.”
Wade makes a face, “Listen, I know what you’re thinking: Wade’s in his underwear, Logan’s emerging from the bedroom… But we didn’t fuck, it’s not that kind of st–”
“Who are you talking to?” you ask from behind him, glancing over his shoulder into the empty hallway.
“No one–You!” The door closes with a bang.
Confused, you walk further into the apartment. “Well, telling me you didn’t is just going to make me think that you did.” Wade darts past you and takes a seat on the couch, but you hang back and lean against the kitchen table to avoid sitting on leather.
Wade suddenly turns to face you. “Did I ever tell you about our time in The Void?”
“Wade,” Logan warns.
Wade’s eyes are sparkling with mischief and you can’t deny how fun it is to indulge the way he pushes Logan’s buttons. It’s a good distraction from how you’re drenched in sweat. And you’re actually curious.
You play your part, letting out a faux-scandalised gasp. “Did you..?”
“Oh, yeah, baby. Wolverine goes both ways. All the ways, really.” He grins. “We’re so alike.”
“Shut up. Both of you.” Logan groans, lacking any real threat as he adjusts in his seat and wipes some sweat off his brow. “It’s too fucking hot to be annoyed.”
It isn’t lost on you he doesn’t deny a thing.
– – – – –
Apartments look weird with nothing in them.
It’s what crossed your mind after you finished packing up your place three days ago, and it crosses your mind now as you look into the open space of your new one from the doorway. It’s a pleasant, late summer day; perfect weather to move, which was on your schedule for today.
“Incoming!” comes from behind you, followed by quick, heavy steps.
You jump aside as Ellie sails through the door, carefully setting a big box marked “Kitchen” down in its designated area, followed by Logan who is balancing three boxes at once. After a beat, Yukio follows, holding a single table lamp in her hand. It takes some effort not to laugh, not just because of how funny it looks, but also because you relate; after all the exhausting late nights you pulled packing up, that’s also the kind of energy you’re bringing to this.
It’s nice of them to help, and instead of shoving that feeling away in fear, you allow yourself to bask in it. You don’t get long, however, because more help has just arrived.
Wade. With Vanessa. Hands interlocked.
It draws everyone’s eyes to the doorway. Wade looks almost bashful, and it baffles you how someone who can say the most insane things unprompted, all without batting an eye, could blush while holding hands with a girl he likes. To his credit, he shakes it off quickly.
“All right, all right,” he says. “Stop ogling me and my girlfriend and get back to work everyone!”
– – – – –
“So it was like an experiment?” you ask, stirring the pot on your stove before taking a careful bite of food off your wooden spoon.
Tonight’s your first night hosting at your new place – Family Dinner, Wade had dubbed it. With fall setting in, you had an idea of what to make, but it still made you nervous to have everyone in your space. Logan saw right through you, offering to come over early to help you prepare. 
Once he had arrived, it hadn’t taken long for him to admit he wasn’t much of a cook, so he mainly chopped vegetables as you chatted; you about your new place, Logan about his new job as a boxing instructor, Laura going off to college. You don’t remember exactly how the subject of his adamantium came up, but he was telling you freely about it.
“They needed someone who could regenerate fast enough to bond with it,” he explains. “I was in a dark place. Figured I didn’t have anything to lose if it didn’t work.”
You nod in understanding. “Do you… remember much about it?” You put your spoon down, then put the lid back on the pan. 
Logan’s knife stops hitting the cutting board. “Yeah, I… I remember every second of it.”
You look at him then. His eyes are still cast down at his task. Unsure of what to say, you think about what you’d want to hear, and you find it might be best to say nothing at all. Instead, your hand finds his shoulder. Logan’s head turns to you, and you feel like the look you share is more important than anything you could’ve told him. His hand covers yours with an appreciative squeeze. 
“But I’m trying to leave that there so I can focus on remembering what happens to me here.” As soon as he’s said it, his hand quickly slips off yours, adding, in a rush, “Here in this timeline, I mean.” 
You smile at him, but a strange feeling settles in the pit of your stomach. “That sounds like a great idea.”
– – – – –
“I need your help with something,” you say, balancing your phone between your ear and your shoulder while you turn a birthday card over in your hand. Deciding you don’t like it, you throw it back on the pile of cards and continue your grocery shopping.
“Just say the word,” comes Logan’s reply from the other end.
“I need you to steal something out of the apartment for me.” There’s a silence, and you purposely let the feeling of trepidation linger.
“Am gonna need you to say a little more than just that.”
You laugh, “Wade’s been talking about getting a little frame for his polaroid. You know, the polaroid that you held on to for him in The Void, after the two of you fu–”
“Yes, I know the one,” he interjects with a huff. He pauses, sighs, then says, “Consider it done.”
THE PARTY
“There you are!” Wade shouts after he opens the door. He pulls you into a hug that you return with a wide smile. Over his shoulder, you see that the apartment’s crowded, bustling with people who are there for his birthday party.
“I got you something,” you say, offering the small package to him after you step inside and hang up your coat.
“Wouldn’t have let you in if you hadn’t,” he admits as he closes the door behind you with a bang. Wade takes the package from your hand, shaking it next to his ear but hearing it make no sound in response. “Is it a cock ring?”
You can’t help but laugh at that. “Unfortunately, they were all sold out.”
“They always are,” he says, making a disappointed face. Bottom lip tucked between your teeth, you watch as he tears at the wrapping paper to reveal his gift. He makes another face when he sees it. “Well, now I feel like an asshole. This is really nice.”
“Logan helped me kidnap it,” you explain, pointing at the picture. “And the little red hearts on the frame, well, they’re your color, but they also reminded me of how much you care about people.”
When he looks at you after, it’s with genuine emotion… but Wade is Wade. “Never thought I’d say this, but I’m kind of happy you walked in here barfing up the place.”
A strange mix of embarrassment and gratitude claws its way up your neck. “Thank you.”
“We should take a new one,” he decides suddenly, pointing at the picture. “You both should be in it.” His head turns, watching as Logan approaches the two of you. “But let’s be realistic, his shoulders are so broad he wouldn’t even fit in the frame, much less his bul–”
“Stop talking about my dick, Wade,” Logan snaps.
“I was saying only good things! Jeez, so sensitive…” Wade turns, putting the picture on the kitchen table behind him where it joins all the other gifts.
“Did he like it?” Logan asks, voice low.
“Yeah,” you smile.
“Good,” he replies. “Was a nice idea.”
You eye all the other gifts, some clearer who they are from than others. “What did you get him?”
The corner of Logan’s mouth lifts as he points at a roll of silver duct tape with a small red bow on top, making you fix them both with a confused look.
“It’s an inside joke,” Logan shrugs.
Wade’s eyes sparkle, but in a rare turn of events, he doesn’t elaborate, only adds, “It’s classified. I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you.” 
“And I have top level clearance, lieutenant,” you reply. You exhale through your nose in an amused laugh when Wade makes a surprised face that indicates you’ve gotten the reference. “What, you thought a Tom Cruise impression could save you?”
“No,” he grins, and as if on cue, the doorbell rings, “but that can. Birthday Boy duty calls, but I want it on record that I could do Top Gun, easily, while Tom would never be able to pull off Deadpool.”
– – – – –
The party settles into something comfortable, soft music in the background of lively chatter. Yukio has just finished telling you about a Professor Layton cosplay she’s doing when you excuse yourself, both your glass and your social battery empty enough to look for a momentary out. Finding your way through the crowd, you make it to the kitchen, filling your glass with water and taking a few sips. 
While you do, the music suddenly gets louder, taking over for the steady chatter. You turn around, leaning back against the kitchen counter, and watch as Wade drags Vanessa to the middle of the apartment. People make room for them, exchanging looks while Wade wraps his arm around her waist, takes her hand in his and begins dancing with her. With a laugh, she slaps him on the chest, before settling into his embrace anyway. Some follow their lead, but your eyes stay glued to them. Wade spins Vanessa under his arm, the smile on her face bright enough to light up the entire room. In return, he looks at her with so much adoration he’s almost glowing himself. It fills you with warmth to see the both of them so happy.
It hits you how you haven’t thought about this in a while. You’d decided long ago that the future wasn’t something you had to worry about, but suddenly you’ve arrived, like you’re in some alternate reality where your future is now, and that it would be nice to share it with someone. The sting behind your eyes catches you a little off guard; mixed feelings of time that has been taken from you, but also of time you’re getting back with the life you now have.
For a while now, you’ve suspected the thing inside you is gone, that there isn’t much to feed off of anymore. If it is, it would make sense that there’s room for something else.
Wade and Vanessa make it look easy, even though you know it’s been far from easy for them. You suppose that’s what it’s like, especially as you get older. It’s less about big gestures, more about small ones; someone to make you laugh, to spin you under their arm, who knows how to apologize, seeks you out during your quiet moments–
“Do you dance?”
You startle, head turning towards the voice next to you– 
“Logan,” you breathe. 
It’s like you’re seeing him for the very first time. He’s standing so close, almost touching you but not quite, heat radiating off of him nonetheless. The plaid shirt he’s wearing isn’t even buttoned and still the fabric is pulled taunt over his shoulders and the thick of his biceps. He’s grinning, his nose pulled up in an adorable scrunch, the corner of his eyes crinkling - you never noticed before, but there’s a hint of green between the hazel.
It hits you so suddenly that you have to grab the counter to keep your balance. Everything that’s been happening, that you’ve been feeling, all the times something happened between the two of you that you couldn’t put your finger on… it falls into place with a well-timed, completely unrelated question and a glance at him.
You like him.
All you can do is blink at him, dazed, unable to speak, even more so when he leans in a little closer, mistaking your silence for misunderstanding. “I mean, not that I– You and Wade were doing a bit earlier, it’s a reference to–” Logan straightens suddenly, his expression slipping into concern as he watches you, “Are you okay?”
You feel warm, so aware of all his attention on you that you’re afraid he might be able to see your pulse blink rapidly below the angle of your jaw. “Yeah,” you reply, voice hoarse, looking away from him to blink the leftover wetness from earlier out of your eyes. 
Anxiety claws its way into your chest, your mind coming to terms with what it’s puzzled together at such a sickening pace that there’s an immediate knot in your stomach. The party has instantly lost its shine, and you look down at the glass in your hand, gulping down its contents. You need to be alone with your thoughts, you need to think about this before–
“I gotta go,” you say in such a rush that it almost sounds like one word while you set your glass on the kitchen counter.
Logan’s eyes follow you as you push past him, grab your coat and reach for the doorknob. “Wait–”
“Bye, Logan.”
THE TABLE
Once at home, you change into something more comfortable, your mind racing while you peel your party clothes off, toss your bra aside, change into an oversized shirt and plop down on the couch after.
Despite having already established that your mind was occupied with other things for a very long time, it’s laughable in hindsight that you never noticed your feelings before. It’s not like you don’t know what Logan’s like; he’s kind, funny, supportive…
…broad, handsome.
Shit.
Why did you have to come to your senses? Things were better before that moment. Logan’s your friend, whom you met in the most unconventional way possible. It’s ridiculous to want more than what you have when what you have is good. Or to think that he would want more.
But he might.
Because you may have been occupied with depression, anxiety, recovery, and everything in between, but you were there; you remember the time you spent with him, the way he looks at you, drinks the coffee you like, laughs at your jokes, seems to know exactly when to call you, seeks you out in a crowd.
But it would change everyth– 
Actually, not a whole lot would change, if you really think about it. You already see him all the time, you’ve seen the very worst of each other, overcome a great deal of hardship together, you make each other better, his friends are your… 
friends. 
You didn’t say goodbye to Wade.
The thought comes suddenly. It was his birthday party and you didn’t even say goodbye to him before you left. You’re a terrible friend. Dread sinks into your limbs, and you reach for your phone to type out a quick, apologetic message. Just as you hit send, there’s a series of loud knocks on the door, and it makes you freeze up where you’re seated.
“Are you in there?” a muffled voice calls out.
It’s Logan, you realize, and a plethora of fake excuses as to why you left the party early present themselves to your mind as you quickly make your way over to the door.
The first thing you notice when you open it is that he’s dripping wet from the rain, clothes soaked through and his hair flat. There’s a deep furrow in his brow, and it’s different from how he usually looks; he looks actually mad.
“Logan, is everything–” you begin, concerned, but he cuts you off by pushing past you and letting himself inside, boots stomping against the wooden floor. 
“Jesus, here you are. Why’d you leave like that, huh? Saying goodbye, your eyes all wet. I went after you and you were fucking gone, it scared the shit out of me. Didn’t see the car at the lookout, but I went to look for you anyway, and you weren’t in the water, thank fuck–”
“Wait, you went–” you pause, the mental image of Logan running out into the rain to the cliffside making your eyes widen. “Did you think..?”
“Yeah,” he sighs, shoulders slumping.
“Shit.” Your heart is racing when you step closer to him. “No, I wasn’t… I don’t want that anymore.”
“Then what the fuck was that all about?”
The desperation and misunderstanding in his eyes is unmistakable, and you hate that you made him feel like that. “I was just… I needed a moment, after seeing Wade and Vanessa like that,” you say, trying to provide yourself with more time to think, unsure if you already want to broach the subject of why you really left.
“You… like Wade?” Logan asks, his frown deepening.
You can’t help the laugh that escapes you at the unexpected question. “No. I mean, I adore Wade, but not like that. He’s with Vanessa.”
The answer does nothing to change his expression. “And you want it to be different?”
His line of questioning confuses you. “I– No. Logan, this isn’t about Wade or Vanessa, but it’s about… what they have. Something that’s real, but imperfect, and that’s what actually makes it perfect, and I just… I was in a really bad place for such a long time, I didn’t give myself time to even think about… I haven’t felt myself wanting for so long,” your gaze flicks up to his. “Seeing them just made me realize there’s so much left that I still want.” 
Internally, you curse the way he always makes you say too much, because you can see the understanding wash over his features. His expression softens, the balled fists by his side loosen, and his eyes search you, as if to see if that thing you want is him. There’s no doubt he finds his answer; you’re ever the open book when it comes to him, and your pulse quickens while he silently observes you. 
Logan reaches for you so quickly that you can barely prepare for it, a hand on your waist to pull you in, another on your cheek to tip your face up and guide your mouth to his. A shaky breath sails out through your nose when your lips meet, your eyes fluttering shut and your palms sliding up his damp but warm chest to curl in the soaked fabric of his shirt. It’s eager, and the angle is off, but it’s quickly adjusted with a brief parting and a near in-sync tilt of your heads in the other direction. 
Logan pulls away, but stays close, and you almost feel his words before hearing them, “Been… thinking about doing that.”
“Really?” you say, breathless and amused. “When did you, um, start wanting to do that?”
“Few weeks ago–Fuck, no, more than that. Almost did, that day after your first meeting, after you told me you were proud of me,” he admits. “But I wanted to give you time, space. Wasn’t sure if you felt–”
“I do. Didn’t realize it before, but I fucking do,” you assure him, another tug on his collar trying to pull him back to you. His admissions, knowing he wants you too, only make you want him more, like you have to make up for all the time you wasted not doing this sooner.
Logan’s hand on your waist holds you off. “I just don’t know how to… how to be this,” he confesses softly.
“That’s okay,” you say, your nose brushing against his. “I don’t either.”
He inches forward like he intends to kiss you again, but seems to reconsider, swallowing hard before saying, “Wouldn’t be the first time we figure it out together, huh?”
The words make you surge forward to close the gap between you, your brows creasing, attempting to convey everything you feel with one press of your lips to his. Logan’s hand slides from your cheek to the back of your head, pulling you to him in a way that seems to mirror your efforts. Something lights up inside you, something you lost long ago, and it makes you bold, opening your mouth under his to get a taste of him. 
His grip on you tightens with a groan, spurring him into action and walking you backwards into the dark kitchen, the only illumination the slivers of moonlight that come through the kitchen window. You jolt when the back of your thighs hit the table, before you’re scrambling to get on top of it, two hands at your waist helping to hoist you up. Your thighs widen to make room for Logan’s while you push the green flannel shirt off his shoulders, struggling to peel it off his arms to the point you have to break away with a laugh to really get it right. It lands on the floor with a wet sound, before he reaches for the back of his shirt, curling his fingers around the collar and pulling it over his head.
Logan’s sturdy, warm to the touch and surprisingly pliant when you can’t help but let your fingers flit along the corded muscles and protruding veins while he toes off his shoes. His hand flies to the back of your head to fist the hair at the nape of your neck when your lips explore, find his jaw, and travel down his neck. A soft sound sails from his mouth, a barely audible moan that carries over into something deeper when your lips brush a spot just above his clavicle. Using the grip he has on you, he drags you back up to his mouth, doing some more of his own exploring when his warm tongue strokes against your own. 
“You’re so good to me,” he murmurs with a buck of his hips against yours. The thrill of having him pushed up against you, half-hard, warm, full of promise, makes you moan, teeth clacking against his when you do. “Always so fucking good to me.”
It makes you want to protest, from the very moment you met, he’s the one always being that to you, but it dies on your tongue when Logan’s flicks over the tips of his fingers. His impatient hand finds its way between you, disappearing under the waistband of your underwear and stretching the material to make room. His name comes out as a whimper when his spit-slick fingers easily glide through the soft skin between your legs. He curses, another buck of his hips pressing his hand closer against you, and your kiss turns messy and uncoordinated when he dips one finger to touch your clit. 
“This okay?” Logan asks when you gasp, drawing languid circles between your legs.
“Yeah, it’s just– Oh, god.” Two thick fingers find your entrance, swirling the wetness there around. “Been a while,” you manage to finish your sentence.
“I’ll make it good for you,” he promises. “You want that?”
All you can do is nod, and Logan presses a kiss to the corner of your mouth before he pulls his hand back. It’s paired with a wet sound that makes your cheeks heat, more so when you watch him get on his knees and yank you to the edge of the table, the quick turn of events and the casual display of his strength making you a little dizzy. Logan’s nose presses into the fabric between your legs with a sharp inhale, before quick, practiced moves work your underwear down your legs. One eager hand places a thigh on his shoulder as another holds you at the bend of your knee. You lie back, arching as you hurriedly pull your t-shirt over your head, leaning up on your elbows just in time to watch him bend down. 
The feeling of Logan’s hot breath sailing out over your sensitive skin alone is enough to make you gasp. He drags his lips and nose across your folds, easing you into it as much as his lack of patience will allow before tasting you with a swipe of his tongue. It isn’t tentative or testing, but firm and sure, and clearly for his enjoyment as much as yours when he repeats his action and groans into you. The vibrations of it and the gentle scratch of his facial hair only add to the liquid feeling in the pit of your stomach. Letting go of your knee, he curls a strong arm around your thigh, spreading you open then pulling you flush against him while he sucks your clit into his mouth.
“Oh, that feels really good,” you spur him on, your heel digging in between his shoulder blades. You watch him with hooded eyes, shifting your weight to one elbow so you can cup your breast with a whine. 
Logan’s eyes slip shut in focus, working his tongue up and down your clit and making you arch into his mouth. Reaching for you blindly, he slides a hand over yours on your chest, fingers fitting between your own and squeezing while his tongue slides lower to lick over where you’re dripping for him. He lets out an appreciative hum as he repeats the move until your thighs clench and shake around his ears. His tongue dips inside you, curling up against the slick walls of your cunt, and his name tumbles from your mouth, soft, pleading, making his eyes shoot open to meet yours.
The sight of him looking up at you like that from between your thighs, with dark eyes, the tip of his nose glistening with your wetness, will probably haunt you for the rest of your life. 
Logan shushes your begging, pulling away and watching as your pussy clenches at the sudden lack of attention. “Let me give you something to come on,” he murmurs, before fitting a finger at your entrance. It meets absolutely no resistance, a second finger sliding inside with just as much ease, and he sets a steady, deep rhythm before his mouth returns to your clit.
“Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck–” Your head rolls back between your shoulder blades, mouth open on a silent gasp, but he draws your attention back to him with a curl of his fingers, finding a spot that makes you go rigid for a second. It all builds so fast, so suddenly. The hand on your chest shakes Logan’s off, finding the crown of his head and sliding your fingers into his hair. He’s too strong to really make purchase, but you try anyway, using your grip to roll your hips against him. The sound of his groans, every flick of his tongue and every squelching, delicious curl of his fingers all send you closer and closer, until his hand presses down on your belly, and…
“Logan,” you manage, voice sharp with a warning that comes too late when he makes you tumble over the edge. 
It’s so much after so long, the force of it making you fall back against the table, something between a gasp and a shout tearing from your throat. He holds you tighter, to keep you in place and guide the desperate roll of your hips against his face. Your orgasm quickly slips into something bordering on oversensitivity, and you let out a dry sob that makes you slap a hand over your mouth when Logan’s tongue travels a path from where his stilled fingers disappear inside you, up to your clit. He stays there, gentle, uncharacteristically patient as you slowly come to a twitching halt. 
He’s a blur when he comes back into your field of view after standing up, towering over you to watch as you come back down to earth. Becoming sharper with every heavy blink of your eyes, you notice the smile on his face is smug, that the hair surrounding it is a shade darker than the rest. You sigh softly when his fingers slip from you, the feeling of them sliding wetly over your clit making you tremble, but his touch doesn’t leave you completely when he moves to stroke the outside of your thigh.
“How’s that?” Logan dares to ask.
“Hmm, no speaking yet,” you protest.
Reaching for him, you slide both of your arms up over his broad shoulders, wrists crossed in the nape of his neck to pull him in for another kiss. It’s slow, and deep, the taste of yourself shared between the two of you as your tongue slides over his. The table protests with a creak when his hands land beside your head, more when his chest pushes down on yours and you wrap a leg around his waist to get him even closer. The hair scattered across his broad chest teases your nipples and the hard ridge of his cock strains against his jeans and presses up against your slick cunt. It makes your jaw go slack, stoking your desire and making you burn with the need to make him feel as good as he just made you feel. 
With a push against his shoulders, you take him along as you sit upright again, accompanied by another creak of the table. Mouth still on his, you slide a hand down to cup him over his jeans, the weight of him against your wide open palm making you pulse. Logan grunts when your hand squeezes, and your mouth slides off his, kissing his jaw, sliding back down his neck. He cups your head, keeping you in place while watching your hand.
“Feels nice,” he husks, voice so deep it makes you want to push him aside and get on your knees for him, but then he asks, “Are you gonna let me fuck you?”
“God, yeah,” you say with a nod, watching as the mark you just sucked into his neck disappears far too soon while you continue rubbing him over the denim. “Want you inside of me.”
“Jesus–Then get it out,” he instructs, guiding your hand to his belt. 
If you weren’t so turned on you might wince at how eager you are, at how quickly you tug the buckle open and pull the leather free. Logan groans when it relieves some of the pressure, letting his forehead rest against yours. Together, you watch your hands make quick work of his zipper, your fist closing around his cock while your other hand works his pants down until he can kick it off and under the table.
He fits nicely in your palm, heavy and ready, sticky at the tip. With a purse of your lips, you let your spit trickle down in a straight line, and he hisses when it hits him. Your free hand flattens against his stomach, sliding down along the hard planes of his body and following the vein just below his belly button down, until it meets your other hand that loosely strokes up to the root of his cock. Logan arches into you when you stroke back up with a tighter grip, all but getting on his toes to chase your touch. Using both of your hands to get all of him, you twist your fists in opposite directions once, twice, before circling his tip with one thumb. Your other hand curls around the underside of him, dragging some of your spit down to his balls with the tips of your fingers.
“F–fuck,” Logan stutters when you play with him there, cupping him in your hand as well as you can and squeezing his shaft when it twitches in response. His eyes slip shut as his palms land on the outside of your thighs with a smack, fingertips digging into your soft skin. 
It makes you jolt, then grin, giddy from the sharp sting and the power you have over his pleasure. “How’s that?” you echo with a teasing lilt.
He does have the words to answer, albeit a little slurred, “‘S good, sweetheart.”
The nickname tacked on at the end takes root in your chest, blooms bright and makes you ache. You translate your appreciation into tightening your strokes and spreading more of the precome that steadily leaks from his tip around.
“C’mere,” Logan says softly, taking over for you with one hand, giving himself a few strokes before pushing your thighs further apart and shuffling closer to line himself up with you.
You’re so wet that the head of his cock is practically already slipping inside of you, but your hand clasps around his bicep when he really starts to breach you. After giving you a shallow little thrust, his hips draw back, before pushing a little further, gauging your reaction.
“Just like that,” you sigh, watching the careful slide of him in and out of you. “Keep going just like that.”
He gets you opened up like that, giving you a little more with each wind of his hips. Logan’s hand finds the back of your neck, his palm splaying out and keeping you close enough that you’re practically sharing air with each sigh and moan. Eventually, your knees have to draw up to his flanks in order for him to keep going and you wind a leg around his hip to close the final distance with a press of your heel into one of the firm cheeks of his ass. A long breath sails out from between your lips when you pulse around him, slowly adjusting to having all of him filling you up. You can tell he has to put considerable effort into letting you, wood groaning below you when he clutches onto the table.
“Fuck, it’s a lot,” you say, and when he grins against your mouth you can’t help but kiss him again – just a peck. The hand at the back of your neck squeezes in reassurance as he continues to let you lead, and it’s a small gesture, but it makes you feel warm all over. You melt into it his touch, your body relaxing as the pleasure of the stretch of him takes over.  
“Can stay like this a little longer if you want,” he says, but the strain in his voice says something different.
“Hmm, no, you can move.” You’ve barely said it, or his hips are drawing back, and it would have made you laugh if it didn’t feel so fucking incredible. He almost slips from you completely, before sliding all the way back inside with a grunt. The table scrapes along the floor, and vaguely you register one of your chairs falling over in the process. When he repeats the action, the furniture squeaks again below you. “Just don’t break my table.”
The sound he makes in response is non-commital, and when he fucks back into you and nudges against something wonderful, you can’t say you disagree. Grabbing hold of his shoulder and using the leg you have wrapped around him, you roll your hips against his, and he begins to meet you halfway until you work up a rhythm together. The table protest further, a shrill sound filling the room after each slap of skin–
With a frustrated groan and accompanied by a startled squeal from yourself, Logan lifts you. The surprised laugh that threatens to bubble up your throat quickly morphs into something heavier that comes out with a rasp when he makes it all look unusually effortless. Attempting to brace yourself, you sling one arm over his shoulders, the other winding around his neck so you can rake your fingers through the hair at the back of his head. It’s a struggle to keep your balance, a helpless heel digging into the back of his thigh to keep yourself upright. Quick to aid, Logan slides an arm under you, fingers splayed across your ass as your knee hangs off the inside of his elbow. He turns a quarter, presses you up against the wall, and doesn’t miss a beat as he continues fucking you. 
“Jesus, Logan,” you say, voice almost a growl and barely recognizable as your own.
With your new position, you can see him better, the both of you lit from the side with the window to your left. The moonlight paints him in a tapestry of light and shadows when the wind blows through the tree branches, momentarily amplifying the glint in his eyes and the flex of his chest and arms like a strobe light.
The different angle he finds with his cock is a little too good, the feeling of the thick base of him stretching you open with each thrust making you dazed and talkative, “It’s so deep like this, can–oh, my god–can feel you everywhere.” 
Logan curses at your words, squeezing your waist and pushing you harder against the wall. There’s a deep-voiced appreciation of how good you feel in there too that doesn’t quite make it from your ears to your brain because somehow he’s still speeding up. His head ducks down to your chest, mouthing at the soft skin of your breast before closing his lips around a nipple. 
You whine, using the grip you have on him to roll your hips against the piston of his while you pant into his crown. Though the sound he makes against you when you do it makes you beam with pride, it’s not something you can keep up for very long, your hold on him slacking after a few thrust until you slip back against the wall. 
Logan pulls back when you do, tightening his hold on you while his eyes glide from the bounce of your tits that glisten with his spit to down between your bodies. 
“Touch yourself,” he instructs, grunting when you immediately do as he says by bringing a hand down between where you’re joined. Your fingers spread in a V-shape around where he fucks into you, collecting some of your mixed arousal before using it to rub your clit. “That’s it, sweetheart, fuck, make yourself come.”
You nod, rapidly feeling everything zeroing in on the fingers that draw tight circles over your clit and that spot deep inside you that Logan’s finding with every thrust. “Yeah, fuck, I’m–Don’t stop, don’t stop, please–”
He’s coming before you are, tucking his head below your chin to let out a deep, drawn out moan against your neck that ends with his teeth grazing your skin. It’s so much, the pressure of him grinding himself into you with twitching, barely there thrusts, the heat of his release as it fills you where you’re gripping him like a vice, and as your fingers still twirl between your legs you come, and come, and come. 
The leg you have wrapped around his hip slips off, but before your toes can even scrape the floor, he catches your thigh, cupping your ass with both hands now to keep you up, and close. With a soft, satisfied sound, you let your forehead fall against Logan’s shoulder, tasting the salt of his sweat with every light press of your lips there.
It takes you a moment to notice your back has come off the wall, that Logan is walking the both of you into your living room and to the couch. He bends his knees, dropping you between your pillows, where you land with as much grace as you can muster considering you feel like you’re made of lead. The soft couch is pleasant against your body, your sore limbs sinking into the cushions. 
Logan fits himself between your legs again, widening them around his broad shoulders before his lips find your overstretched thighs, leaving marks and kisses up up up, until his tongue slips back into your pussy. Your back arches off the couch, hands shooting down to fist his hair with a whine while Logan’s hand fists his cock. As your eyes adjust to the darkness, you can tell he’s already getting hard again, and his tongue is making something swirl low in your belly that’s making you pant, and...
It’ll be a long night.
THE PEARL
It had taken a lot of convincing and downright groveling, but Wade had allowed you to bring a movie for movie night. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust your taste in movies, his main gripe with your choice was that it wasn’t a Christmas movie – mandatory for December. Wade’s right, but after you explained that it’s the movie you always watch at the end of the year (and after Logan and yourself conceded that yes, his birthday was technically also your anniversary) he’d agreed. 
Now that you’re actually watching it, you suspect he’s genuinely invested, because after a handful of comments about The Hulk, he’s been quiet for longer than you’ve ever heard him be quiet.
In the scene on the screen, Mark Ruffalo’s character Dan and Keira Knightley’s character Gretta are taking an evening walk around New York City, dancing, singing and sharing music with each other as they do. Eventually, they stop and sit next to each other on some steps, watching as the city continues to move without them.
“...the most banal scenes are suddenly invested with so much meaning, ya know? All these banalities, they're suddenly turned into these… these beautiful, effervescent pearls,” Dan says, wistfully looking on as New York bustles around him. “I gotta say, as I've gotten older these pearls are just… becoming increasingly more and more rare to me.”
The arm Logan has slung around your shoulder tightens, and the couch creaks softly as you lean further into his side, your cheek squishing against his warm chest.
“More string than pearls?” Gretta inquires with a frown.
“Yeah. You got to travel over a lot more string to get to the pearls.” There’s a pause as he turns to look at her, “This moment is a pearl, Gretta.”
She gives him a hint of a smile. “It sort of is, isn't it?”
“All this has been a pearl,” he admits, sharing a look with her.
A finger curls under your chin, tipping your head up until your eyes meet Logan’s. He gives you the same look you just saw on the screen, his eyes soft as they take you in, the hint of green between the hazel illuminated by the light of the television. A thumb swipes over your bottom lip fondly, before he leans down to kiss you.
It takes a lot of string indeed.
Sometimes even interdimensional string.
– – – – –
(THE END)
If you made it all the way here, thanks for reading. Seriously. Please come say hi and/or share your thoughts via ask/messages/reblogs/whatever you feel comfortable with. I hope to share more writing soon - emphasis on hope, I'm not making promises, just an educated wish.
And lastly, if you're struggling with mental health problems, please don't wait for a handsome stranger to sweep you off your feet. I know from experience that it can be incredibly difficult to reach that hand out, but I also know from experience that things can get better. There are ways to get help and you deserve to get help 🫂
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deebris · 3 months ago
Text
The Misteryous Visitor 6
Batfamily x batsis (platonic!)
Synopsis: Being alone with Damian after so many years didn't lead to the ideal conversation you two should have had, but every little word seemed to have helped you two get closer at least a little bit. However, the chaotic turbulence of the night returned when your mother decided to leave.
Warnings: Family discussion; mention of kidnapping; maternal possessiveness;
Word count: 4k
Note: I wanted to post this and part 7 together, because they are the last two, but it didn't turn out as planned. I hope you like it.
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6
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Damian walked to the end of the hallway and turned right, heading toward the living room. His only goal at the moment was to find you and try to prepare you for the catastrophic revelation he knew would come at some point. He was already tired of seeing you so unaware of everything; you weren’t an idiot and didn’t deserve to be treated like one.
But it seemed he didn’t have to try too hard because as soon as he turned the corner and walked a few meters, he abruptly stopped upon seeing that you hadn’t disappeared. In fact, you were there, sitting on the floor next to an old portrait of Martha, your grandmother, curled up as if just waiting for someone to come and get you. Someone who wasn’t your brother, apparently.
“There you are.” He took a few steps back and made no effort to crouch to your level; instead, he stood staring at you with a reproachful look that made you pull your legs even tighter to your chest. “Get up, quickly. The floor is for rats.”
He was trying to ignore the tension, but you were giving him the silent treatment, which made him uncomfortable, though he would never admit it to himself. You had done this to him many times before, but it was always over silly reasons, so he never minded.
You also could never hold a grudge for long, and when you were younger, within an hour, you would have forgotten any disagreement between the two of you and would then come to annoy him again. But now you were older, it wasn’t a tantrum anymore, and the reason was much more complex than any other. You weren’t ignoring him because you were simply irritated, and he feared it was different now.
Damian couldn’t ignore the irritation he felt seeing how ashamed of yourself you seemed since he first saw you. He hated that trait of your personality, always very aware of everything and everyone around you, though it was contradictory to your incredible ability to do unthinkable nonsense.
From where you both were, he still had a view of the bedroom door. The boy couldn’t help but glance over there, curious about what kind of discussion your parents were having. At the same time, he was contemplating various ways to say something or maybe try to fix the awkwardness between you two now, but your guilty voice caught him off guard:
“I didn’t mean to cause harm.” You sounded hoarse, and you two stared at each other, and unlike his sharp eyes, yours were wavering. He gave you a hard expression, but not because of the aversion you thought he had for you, but out of confusion.
It was a pity that Damian’s feelings weren’t easy to read, so you thought he was angry because that night you found out Bruce was someone very important to your brother now. “I didn’t mean to hurt Mr. Wayne. I really don’t know what I did to make him like this. I’m sorry.”
So you thought you had done something wrong to make your father that way, Damian concluded. He hadn’t reflected on how you might feel that way, and fighting against his own callous nature, he made an effort to relax his posture and crouched down in front of you. Damian didn’t dare sit the same way you were, balancing on his toes and leaning his torso forward.
“It wasn’t anything you did.” You’re not sure, but you risk saying this was the first time you heard your brother so soft in your entire life. Damian had always been very loud and was almost always yelling or offending someone, but now, combined with the gravity his voice had gained with puberty, it was tender.
He was going to say something else, but suddenly a strange noise sounded. It was muffled, but it seemed like something had fallen, and you both could feel the ground vibrate. It came from the bedroom, which made you become alert. You started to get up, worried, but your brother’s firm hand on your shoulder stopped you.
“It must have been nothing. Don’t worry about them.” The tenderness had been replaced by harshness, but it wasn’t directed at you.
Sliding your back against the wall again, you rested your chin on your knees while admiring your own shoes, and just like always, you couldn’t maintain your silent treatment with Damian for long:
“I think I bothered Mr. Wayne by coming here. Mom will be mad at me for this later, I know she will.” You were obviously nervous, seeking refuge in Damian as you always did when you had to face her. Your mother didn’t have a good relationship with Batman, and now having to deal with you for disturbing his evening would make her furious. The little relief you felt earlier had vanished, suspecting she had only been affectionate before not to show Bruce.
“Mom is mad all the time.” He tried to calm you down. It would be unbelievable for someone who knows Talia only through her assassin image to hear such a thing. She was a cold and calculating woman, but you both knew when she was upset. She didn’t express it in a conventional way, and Damian had already gotten used to it. Your mother’s mood didn’t concern him much, but it was still scary for you.
“You were mad…” Your statement made him sigh because it was true. A few minutes ago, he had reacted that way, but there was context he couldn’t immediately explain to you. “Maybe I can apologize to him? If he forgives me, I promise I won’t do it again, and then mom-”
“Y/n.” Your brother cut off your frantic speech sharply; you were almost hyperventilating. “No one is mad at you.” He said it as a statement, leaving no room for you to contest him.
“He was calm.” you started to ramble, picking at the fabric of your clothes with your nail. “He read something he took out of his pocket and started feeling sick, I was trying to help…”
Damian frowned. He had seen Dick give a small piece of paper to his father downstairs. That idiot wouldn’t have been stupid enough to write on it that you were his daughter, right? What a wonderful way to tell something like that.
“Idiot.” Your brother muttered aloud without meaning to, feeling immense anger at the thought that Dick had done that. And only after he blurted out the word did he realize you were still beside him, listening. “Not you.” He tried to explain hastily, still with a furious expression on his face.
It was strange for him to talk to you that way. He had called you an idiot many times during childhood, and you used to call each other much worse things, as siblings do. But your relationship now was delicate, like a strand of cotton candy, since that intimacy you once had was lost.
“By the way, Bruce is just stressed about Strange.” Damian analyzed your reaction at the mention of the name. To you, Strange was just another enemy of Batman, never suspecting that the man who appeared at your house years ago could somehow be him.
The League of Assassins had many enemies scattered across the globe; at that time, you thought it was just another one of them. You also never asked or wanted to talk about it, which was unusual for how chatty you could be sometimes. For you, Hugo Strange and the person who kidnapped you back then had no connection.
“There must have been something about our investigation there. I’m sure it was Dick who gave him that card. You didn’t do anything.” He said.
Your heart returned to its normal rhythm, but it grew heavy again as you understood the facts. Damian was blaming Dick for that thing Bruce was holding onto, but it was you who had given it to him in the first place. Bruce became distressed when you mentioned the gift and quickly pulled it out of his pocket. That must have been the object Strange gave you.
“Dami.” He heard the nickname leave your lips, and a flicker of hope hit him. There was still a certain closeness between you there. “I was the one who brought the card here; it’s not Dick’s fault. Strange gave it to me to give to Mr. Wayne.”
Damian abruptly stood up, returning to an upright posture. “Strange did what?” Neither Tim, Dick, nor Jason had mentioned this. They said they were telling the whole story, but none of them mentioned any kind of message. Was that why Tim had been acting so strange when he arrived? He remembers seeing him throw a box in the trash and getting all nervous when Damian got irritated and asked what it was. “Was it a small gift box, by any chance?”
“Yes, the same size as the card.” You made a square with your thumbs and index fingers, trying to show the shape of the object. “Just like this. But Mr. Wayne didn’t let me read it; I acted badly by trying to see what was in there too. I shouldn’t have been nosy.”
So Bruce didn’t let you know on purpose? Maybe he just didn’t want you to find out this way. He should have told you. Damian was about to open his lips to take the initiative, but the sound of someone approaching stopped him.
Alfred paused for a moment, finding it odd to see the two of you here. He had returned to make sure you were okay once more and then leave you alone until later in the day. “Master Damian,” He said the boy’s name as a form of acknowledgment, “I thought you were asleep.” The butler added, addressing both of you.
“Alfred!” You got up and walked over to him, who rested a hand on your head expectantly. He saw the way you looked hesitantly at your brother, seeking some kind of approval before returning your attention to him once more. “Something bad happened to Mr. Wayne; he wasn’t well.”
Alfred's eyes widened, looking at Damian for an explanation or just confirmation that it was true. He was obviously tense and speechless for a moment but quickly composed himself.
“What happened, dear?” He asked, and once again you sought your brother’s approval, who took the initiative to explain in your place.
“He…” Damian began, trying to find a way to say it. “Bruce discovered something about Strange.” He said with a suspicious tone and the butler quickly understood the underlying implications.
“Where is he?” Alfred asked, worried.
Damian wasn’t planning to answer, knowing Alfred’s aversion to Talia, but you jumped in: “He and my Mom are talking.”
The butler was obviously displeased and furrowed his brow. He had planned to tell Bruce privately about his supposed daughter, but apparently, things had moved ahead of him. But Alfred knew Bruce well and understood that despite his instability, he would handle things as rationally as possible. Or at least he hoped so.
It was unsettling how a simple night so suddenly turned into yet another Wayne family drama.
“Well,” he sighed, “It seems it’s too early for breakfast, but also too late to go back to sleep.” He gave your hair a gentle tousle with the hand that still rested there, and you appreciated it. Indeed, the sky was already beginning to lighten. “How about some tea to start the day, miss? Or maybe coffee?”
“That’s fine.” You said, accepting that he would guide you through the mansion once more, but stopped when you realized your brother wasn’t making an effort to follow. “Damian, aren’t you coming?”
Your hopeful tone made him huff and approach to follow you. “Let’s go then.” He joined you, heading downstairs.
Damian was deeply irritated by how easily you let your emotions come and go. To him, it was inconceivable that you weren’t resentful, even hating him, as he had presumed you would be just moments ago. The way you let your emotions dissipate so easily bothered him, and he couldn’t understand how you could forgive so simply.
This behavior had always been the target of Damian’s criticism, as he didn’t have the same ease with forgiveness. What ate him up inside, however, was the certainty that even if you found out everything he and Talia had done, you would still be able to forgive them.
Damian suspected that this readiness to forgive came from a lack of options. Throughout your life, you had only him and your mother, and breaking away from either of them would be devastating. Perhaps that was Talia’s greatest fear; even if she tried to convince herself that she kept you hidden for your own good, away from the League and Batman, Damian knew that deep down, she wanted to ensure a safe harbor, someone who would always be emotionally supportive.
Although you might appear to be an very naive girl, your morals were unwavering. And incredibly, Talia managed to keep you loyal to her. Both of them knew that you secretly hated criminals and dreamed of a perfect justice that would never exist, at least not in Gotham City.
Damian knew that his mother’s real fear was that you would find someone else beyond her, people with whom you could connect, not out of obligation or lack of other options, but because you genuinely wanted to. This emotional dependency, nurtured by Talia, made you more spoiled than Damian, who in turn always confronted Talia with stubbornness and resistance.
“Do you like any fruit?” Pennyworth asked you, who were with your arms crossed on the counter, while your brother sat at the end of the table, just keeping watch over your figure.
“All of them.” You replied, and Alfred laughed contentedly. It was nice to hear something like that, especially as he opened the kitchen cupboard and saw the colorful cereals inside, all from Tim’s never-ending stash of treats.
“Master Damian?” The butler asked the boy.
“No, thank you.” He declined with a grimace.
You watched with curiosity as Alfred grabbed a bunch of colorful fruits and began cutting them. There was some kind of dough resting in a container nearby, which you noticed when he moved a cloth to check, and it smelled so good. It was comforting to see him there in the kitchen, even doing something as simple as cutting fruits.
Talia was a very busy woman, and cooking definitely didn’t suit her elegant demeanor. Housework was not part of her routine, so you often ended up eating at expensive restaurants. That’s why every move Alfred made captured your attention, and he noticed.
“Do you want to help me, miss?” He asked, intrigued.
“Can I?” You asked back, already moving to stand next to him with excitement. The butler nodded and instructed you to wash your hands in the sink on the other side of the kitchen.
You were distractedly scrubbing soap on your hands and far enough not to hear Damian whisper: “Bruce isn’t going to let Mom take her home.”
Alfred looked up, not at all surprised by the news. “Does your sister know, Master Damian?” He kept his voice at the same low tone as the boy’s.
“No, Pennyworth. That’s why I’m telling you.” Damian checked to see if you were still far, seeing you drying your hands and hurrying: “When they both come out of that room and Mom leaves, she’s going to make a fuss.”
“What should I do?” You came back, interrupting their conversation and asking for instructions.
Alfred set you the task of removing the stems from the strawberries until a noise from upstairs alerted all three of you. It sounded like glass, and it didn’t take long to hear Talia’s voice calling for the butler, who moved to go to her.
“I’m leaving,” Talia said with a firmness that disguised well the inner turmoil she was facing behind her attitude.
You were stunned, and a rising panic took hold of you. Alfred hadn’t noticed you had followed him until you heard: “I’m going to get my shoes and coat.” You declared. Your mind was spinning with the idea that your mother was angry with you, seeing how she was acting.
Talia turned slightly to you, but the look she gave was impassive. “You’re not coming,” she said. The coldness in her voice wasn’t unfamiliar but struck deep in your chest. “You’re going to stay here with your brother.”
“But…” You tried to process what was happening, needing to look at Damian next to you for a moment until reality hit you back. “Why?” You asked with a trembling breath, already approaching her and grabbing your mother’s hand in desperation.
“For heaven’s sake, Y/n. Isn’t this what you wanted?” She rolled her eyes and looked at you with impatience. “You and Damian will get to spend time together again.”
“But what about you, Mom? Why can’t we all be together?” You clung to her hand even tighter, trying to keep her there forever, but all you received in return was the look she gave when you upset her.
“I’ll send your things with someone. Be obedient.” She said, but her real desire was for you to be rebellious, especially towards Bruce. Your mother crouched to your height and pinched your cheeks with her hands while whispering so the other two wouldn’t hear: “But remember, you’re mine daughter, understand? Your mother will always be here for you. I’ll get in touch.” She gave you a strong kiss, leaving a perfect lipstick mark, and grabbed the coat that was already in Alfred’s hands with haste.
“I want to go with you!” Talia felt your arms around her waist and sighed.
“You're old enough to be acting like this, Y/n. Let go.” She tried to wriggle free on her own, but your grip was so strong that her fingers barely moved. “Y/n, enough!” She shouted genuinely furious, and you jumped back in fear. The sight made her wilt, but she still suppressed it and opened the door.
You were in shock, never imagining that your actions could have led to this. It was as if she hated you for it, and you felt a pressure on your forehead, unsure if it was from the anger you felt at how your mother treated you or from the desperation.
“Don’t go after her,” Damian ordered, knowing you would do it anyway, which is why he held you in place.
You couldn’t accept it. The idea of being left behind, the feeling of being rejected by the only family you knew, was overwhelming. “Mom!” You shouted, struggling to free yourself from Damian’s grip in fury, the sadness totaly replaced by a burning rage. “Don’t leave! I’m sorry for disobeying! I didn’t mean to do anything wrong!” you screamed. “Why are you like this with me?!” You shouted louder, not caring about making a scene.
Talia’s feet were already buried in the snow, trying to hide the pain she felt, but your muffled voice didn’t help. The sound of the door closing was like a final blow, and her heart sank even further. She didn’t care whether Bruce was right or not; she hated him like hell now.
You were sobbing and gasping, the pain of rejection still present in your chest. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to disobey. I didn’t want you to leave…” You murmured lower, feeling your throat ache.
As she took more steps towards her own car, her thoughts raced. She knew that sooner or later you would need to know the truth, and deep down, she wished the news had come from her.
She tried to keep her mind clear during the brief walk to the car, passing by a snow-covered tree where ravens had gathered to rest. She was so distracted for a few seconds that when she felt an arm pull her back, she instinctively threw the stranger away, who hit the trunk and caused the birds to start flying erratically while cawing discordantly.
“What the hell is this!” She shouted furiously, shocking the boy who immediately began to apologize while getting up, feeling pain.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“Scare me?!” She was outraged by his assumption. As if she would be scared by a kid like him. “And which of Bruce’s little pests are you?”
“My name is Tim.” The boy assumed a serious tone now, abandoning the polite courtesy he had before.
“And are you going to stand there like an idiot, or are you going to tell me what you want?”
Despite her hurry, Tim stared at her and looked back, checking if there was anyone outside the mansion and taking a few seconds to do so. Talia’s arrogant look didn’t intimidate him, and he spoke firmly:
“A few years ago, in that alley…” The phrase made her eyes widen, but she still took a deep breath to compose herself. “It was you.”
Talia never thought she would have the opportunity to face that boy again after that day. When Strange fled, she followed him and caught up with him. She remembers how she grabbed the man by the collar when she didn’t see you there. After wringing the truth out of that pathetic man, Talia had to let him go as she rushed desperately to where you were, but not before leaving a beaten face as a gift. But that night, that boy... Tim, had heard your call for help.
“So, you were the Robin.” She let out a curious laugh, looking Tim up and down. “And so what if it was me?”
“You tricked me. Pretended to be a helpless person.” He frowned while narrowing his eyes at her. “I remember the little girl I saved; it was her.” Tim turned his face towards the mansion again, as if to point at you.
“You just had the luck of arriving before me. And what did you expect me to do? Tell you who I was?” She took her gloves out of her pocket and began putting them on. “Do you think you could have caught me, kid?” She laughed sarcastically this time, belittling him.
“You could have told me the truth. You had the opportunity to tell Bruce about Hugo Strange all this time. We could have protected her.” Tim’s eyes moved around, trying to process. “After I left there, Bruce and I continued on patrol and found him passed out. If we had known who he really was, he might be in jail now.”
“Spare me your laments, kid. She’s going to stay here, isn’t she? So what else do you want?” Talia said, and Tim wasn’t surprised by the information. He had already assessed the scene while waiting to approach her outside. He had jumped through the bedroom window, having not been able to sleep after recognizing your face.
Tim remained silent. It seemed that Talia had a very concrete idea about everything, and it made no sense to try to circle her with assumptions about how things could have been. He couldn’t help but feel foolish, realizing that you had been so close to him at some point, and he couldn’t do anything for Bruce since he didn’t know.
“Listen.” Talia’s surprisingly soft voice caught him off guard. “Thank you for helping, even though I didn’t exactly need it.” Despite trying to be understanding, she couldn’t help but emphasize. “She means everything to me, you understand? Put some sense into your father, or I’ll find a way to take her back, and I promise you’ll never see her again.”
Tim swallowed hard at the mention of Bruce but snorted indifferently soon after. “He’s not as bad as he seems.”
“I noticed.” She murmured with irony and turned to walk away, with Tim not interrupting her this time. The boy watched her go to the car, but suddenly she stopped at the gate. She ran her fingers over the electronic lock, and suddenly some loose wires became visible. Tim found it strange, and Talia looked at him with a smile, which even from a distance, he could see.
“I think you’re going to need someone to fix this.” She shouted for him to hear, and for a moment, Tim thought if she had done it, but only now did he wonder how you had gotten past the front gate. It seems that your innocent face hid some skills. “Don’t pamper her, and tell your father and Pennyworth not to let her eat too much sugar.” She let the wires go while grumbling, slamming the car door, and driving away.
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moonlight1110 · 9 months ago
Text
Crawling back to you
ex-boyfriend!Ghost x Reader ; (Late) Valentines Special ;)
Your ex-boyfriend who comes banging at your door in the middle of the night. He desperately wants you back, and when he invites himself in, is there really nothing else you can do?
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Tags: afab!reader, p in v, smut, nsfw, vaginal sex, rough sex (kinda idk), mating press, pathetic!Simon, far from canon simon, i write with badjhur's voice in my ear, not propfread, proofread anyway BC I hate typos
Notes: planned on writing something for valentines but uni fucked me sideways so im posting today <3
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"What the hell..." You jump as three hard knocks come from your door, almost as if the person on the other side was just a second away from breaking it down.
You didn't need to go through your mental library to know who it was, you knew exactly who was at your door at this ungodly hour because who else in their right mind would show up uninvited except him.
With a grunt, you roll off of bed and trudge to your front door. A heavy feeling pressing down on your chest as you got closer and closer to the door, you contemplated if opening it was even a good option, but knowing who was on the other side, choosing to ignore him was going to be a poor decision on your part.
With an tired sigh, you grabbed the door knob, squeezing it as doubts ran through your mind, but you are snapped out of it when he knocks, even harder than before.
"What are you doing?!" You ask, trying not to scream at him to avoid receiving another noise complaint from your overbearing neighbors when you opened the door slightly to peek out the small crack of it. Standing on the other side was someone you knew all too well.
"Let me in" his voice was low as he looked down at you, dark eyes staring at you from the opening of his balaclava. "Please..." He took a step forward, placing a hand on your door, but you stayed firm. "Simon, you can't just come here in the middle of the night and expect me to let you in" you argued, hardening the hand that was holding your door.
"I miss you, baby, come on..." He pushed the door slightly, you knew you wouldn't stand a chance even if you tried your hardest to shut the door. With how strong and large Simon was, trying to fight back against him was next to impossible.
"Simon, please..." You looked at him, brows furrowing. However, even at your attempts to stand by your decision, there was a part of you that wanted him to just push your door open... An unexplainable feeling, you thought.
"Take me back... I'll do anything" He sounded desperate, his voice sounded unlike the person you thought you knew, he sounded hurt, vulnerable, not like the usual stone cold and stoic Ghost you knew.
"You broke up with me remember... You can't just go back on that when you want to" your expression hardened in contrast to his which softened as he looked into your eyes. He regretted it, deeply.
"I did, I know that but I didn't know I would be making the biggest mistake of my life, love..." He steps closer, pushing your door open just a bit again. "Don't call me that... Just don't" you shake your head in disapproval but that small part of you just misses the way he called you that, how it rolled off his tongue like honey, you missed it.
"Just let me in, let's talk... I miss you" the last part comes out as a mumbled plea as he pushes your door open finally, stepping inside like he never left. Those three words just made you want to jump over the boundaries you so desperately tried to build up, but all you could do was step aside and let him in, there was no point in fighting him.
"What's there left to talk about, Simon?" You sighed, crossing your arms over your chest as Simon removed his shoes, it looked so familiar next to yours...
"I want you back, I can't fuckin' live without you..." His brows knit together as he looks down at you, reaching out but you step back with a disapproving look. "Then why did you end it in the first place if you were just gonna come back to me anyway..." Your hands fall to your sides with a defeated sigh leaving your lips.
"I told you, it was the distance, my work... I thought breaking up with you would be the best choice for the both f'us..." Ignoring your attempts at creating space between you, he steps closer, caging you between his arms as he leaned against the wall, effectively trapping you under him.
"I was wrong, baby... So fuckin' wrong..." he whispered, his eyes silently pleading for your to just listen. He leaned forward so close you could feel his hot breath even through the fabric of his balaclava.
"I didn't even want to leave you..." You started, your face scrunching as you remembered the events that happened the day he cut things off between the two of you. "You made up so many reasons, so many excuses... You put words in my mouth..." You looked away, feeling your chest tighten again at the recollection of your memories together. It hurt to bring up and remember but with seeing Simon standing in front of you again, it was impossible to push those thoughts away.
"I know, I know..." He took your chin inbetween his index and thumb, willing you to look back at him. His expression was one of guilt and desperation, that much was clear with the way he was looking at you.
"But I can't stand another day without you, been regretting that decision every fuckin' day, love..." He leans in, snaking a hand around your waist. You want to pull away, to push him off and tell him to fuck off from you forever but you don't, you just cant find it in you to push him away when all you wanted was to be with him.
"Those months away from you felt like an eternity, don't wanna feel that anymore..." He pulls you closer, holding you tightly against his chest with his nose now inhaling the scent of your hair from the crook of your neck.
"We can't... This is the type of shit that complicates things, Simon..." you place your hands on his chest as if you even wanna push him off you. "I don't care..." He groans and pulls his balaclava off, breathing against your neck. It makes you squirm the way his hands are travelling down now, you missed it more than you were willingly to openly admit to him anyway, but that's no issue for how your body is responding.
"Fuck if it means we'll get complicated, I need you back..." He kisses at your neck, still familiar with all the spots that just made you melt. "Can't be away from you for another fuckin' day, baby..." He groans, pinning you against the wall by your hips, grinding a knee to your clothed cunt.
"Just say the word and I'll leave..." He groans, giving your throat a good lick all the way to your collarbone as his hands found your ass, kneading like he owned it. "I'll leave and I'll never come back, I won't bother you... But y'need to tell me..." His lips drag along your shoulder as he pulls you closer on his thigh, "Tell me... Tell me y'never wanna see me again, push me away..." He mumbles against the side of your neck.
Your breath hitches in your throat with the way he was talking to you, you knew Simon was a man who was true to his word and once you'd tell him to leave, he would.
"C'mon..." he retracts from your neck and pulls back to look you in the eyes, his brows are furrowed and his eyes are blown out as his eyes flicker over your features like he's trying to memorize every single detail before you told him to leave.
"I..." you scramble to find the words, you wanna tell him to leave but you also want him to stay, you two didn't even end on that much of a bad note, it was a misunderstanding, a poor decision which was made in the heat of the moment...
"Don't leave..." You give in to your emotions, just seeing Simon again after your breakup hurt like hell, but god would you curse yourself if you allowed him to leave again... You couldn't take that, seeing him walk out again, leaving you for the second time.
"Fuck..." He groans as he connects your lips, his hands are pulling at you and pinning you against the wall. It's a passionate and desperate kiss from him, which you return with your own, full of want and the same desperation you craved would be quenched for such a long time. No one did it like him, no one ever loved you like Simon Riley ever did.
Your arms find his neck as your head tilts, allowing Simon to push his tongue past your lips. He doesn't let up, doesn't get up for air, he just fucking wants you, wants to take you right then and there with how much he misses you.
His hands cup your ass as he lifts you up against the all and you wrap your legs around his torso as he finally pulls away from the kiss. "I need you, baby... Fuckin' missed you too much..." he practically growled as he sucked on your neck, walking to your bedroom.
"Simon, calm down..." You mumbled as he set you down on the bed, you could feel how rapidly his heart was beating but that only made him chuckle. "Can't calm down when I have you in my arms again, love" He stared down at you as he leaned back up, removing his shirt quickly.
"Missed you so much..." He whispered against your ear when he dove back down, making space for himself between your legs as he hovered on top of you with his arms on either side of your head. "Missed the way you feel around me..." He hummed while his hands trailed down your waist, to your hips, then just above the hem of your flimsy sleeping shorts.
"Did y'think 'bout me too? hm?" he asked, pressing a kiss to your jaw as his hand travelled under your shorts, his middle finger now circling on your wet clit through your panties. You didn't notice how you ruined your underwear until you felt how slick and uncomfortable it was when Simon pressed harder against your clit.
"Yeah... I did..." you whispered breathily, back arching at the feeling of Simon's thick fingers pleasuring you. He smirks, taking the opportunity to kiss and suck at your neck. "Mmm... Yeah?" He chuckles against your throat, parting your slick covered panties to the side to finally tease at your wet pussy.
"Fuck baby... She missed me didn't she?" he laughs, looking down at the way his hand moved from under your shorts. "Fuckin' pussy missed me too, huh?" He chuckles, as he pushes his thick finger inside you, making you gasp and grip at his arm.
"Simon!" you shut your eyes, back arching as he pressed gentle kisses against your throat. "Relax baby... need to prepare you again, been too long since I've fucked this pretty little pussy..." He coos, adding another finger to stretch you out, curling them so deliciously inside you.
"Fuck... I-" you whimper, sucking in a breath as he finds that spot inside you that just makes you break, he still knows of course, knows every single spot and every single way to make you crumble and submit to him. "I'm gonna cum, Si..." You whisper breathlessly, hands shaking around Simon's arm weakly.
Simon doesn't say anything except give you a cruel chuckle when he waits for the perfect time, just when you're about to cum to take his fingers out and it makes you shoot him a nasty glare. "Why did you do that?!" You whined, but your voice weakens at the sight of the hard bulge under his pants.
"Don't want you cummin' on anything but my cock tonight, love..." he chuckles dangerously, sitting on his knees to unbuckle his pants. He looks down at you with a hunger in his eyes, licking his lips as he finally rolls the zipper down. "C'mon, don't just stare" He smirks, snapping you out of your trance. "Right..." you blink, moving closer to him.
"Good..." he praises as he watches you tug his pants and boxers down together and tossing it down the side of the bed. "Fuck..." He hisses when he's finally free, his dick rock hard and heavy, twitching as beads of precum roll down from the tip. Your breathing quickens when you see it, it's bigger than you remember, thick and running with veins you wish you could memorize.
"On your back..." Simon commands, his voice low as he wraps a hand around his shaft to stroke his dick slowly. "But..." you look into his eyes but he shakes his head with a mean smirk when he looks at you. "As much as I wanna fuck that pretty mouth of yours, that's gonna have to wait another time" He chuckles, pushing you down on your back by your shoulder.
"I need t'fuck you, baby... Need t'feel you 'round my dick again..." he growls, watching the way your face is flushed and your legs are spread out on either side of his torso. He strokes his dick in his hands as he hums, using his free hand to slide your shorts and panties over your legs, throwing it with his pants.
"Fuckin' hell..." he groans when his eyes finally see your bare pussy, your clit twitching and your entrance clenching around nothing. It makes him fist his cock harder as he runs his free hand down your stomach, his thumb finding your clit and rolling it down in little circles.
"Stop teasing..." you say through gritted teeth as one of your hands grip the sheets under you and the other pressed against Simon's chest. "M'not teasing" He chuckles, tapping his dick on your clit a few times. "Just shut up and fuck me already, Simon..." You whine, slapping his chest pathetically.
"Gettin' feisty now, eh?" he laughs lowly as a low satisfied rumble comes from deep in his throat when he grinds his cock against your pussy, letting it catch your slick. "Need to take it slow, love... I don't wanna hurt you" Simon groans, aligning his tip with your entrance.
"Oh... god-" you breathe out matched with a long moan from Simon as pushes the tip in. It makes a lewd, sort of wet sound when he enters you. It makes your head spin in the way it makes Simon throw his head back as he pushes deeper until he's completely inside you with a hard thrust.
He rolls his thumb over your clit, waiting for your breath to steady. "Doin' so good, baby... Taking me so well..." He coos, pressing on your clit as his eyes narrow on the sight of your body, all hot just for him. "M-move, Si..." You whimper out, closing your eyes tightly and adjusting to the feel of Simon inside you again after so long.
Simon hums while he rolled his hips, slowly thrusting his cock in and out. It's slow so he can let you adjust, help you remember how good he stretches you out that it makes you all dumb and pliable for him. "Mmm, yeah... Feels so good, love" he grunts, his hips moving just a tad bit faster.
He thrusts all the way to the hilt every single time, and it feels like he goes deeper and deeper with every thrust he gives you. He squeezes at your thighs, his fingers digging into the soft flesh as he parts your legs even more, putting you in a mating press.
It makes you whimper the way you're starting to feel the slight pain of Simon's body pressed right into you. He's like an animal now, fucking you in such a primal way when he growls in your ear, encouraged by the delicious moans you give him and how you squirm and say his name in your breathy, fucked out voice.
"That's it, taking me like such a good fuckin' girl" He chuckles, driving his hips harder, the sound of his skin slapping against your cunt almost drives you crazy. He leans up, letting your legs rest as he massages them gently, a sharp juxtaposition from how hard he's fucking your weeping cunt.
"Needed this so bad, baby..." He groans, pulling your legs around his torso as he leans down to kiss at your neck. You can hear him mumbling sweet little nothings in your ear as his hands grip at your thighs and the soft skin of your waist.
"Tell me y'missed me... I wanna hear it" He mumbles against your neck, moaning lowly. He sounded so calm and so gentle yet the way his cock was filling you up and stretching you out so good was far from gentle. "Tell me y'missed this dick, baby, c'mon..." He hums, his hand travelling up to play with your tits.
"I-I mis-" You started, but the way Simon was fucking you so good made your head spin you couldn't even string a proper sentence together. He laughed, grazing his teeth over the skin of your shoulder, "Awe can't even speak anymore?" He teases, slowing his hips down and it makes you groan in disapproval.
"Why'd you slow down..." you whine, looking at him with half-lidded eyes. "Wanna hear you say you missed me first" He chuckled. It was bad enough that he slowed down, but it's even worse when he pulls out and looks down at you with a cruel smirk, stroking the cock that was supposed to be making you cum.
"Tell me how bad you missed me, baby, you can do it" He laughs lowly and he doesn't look away from you as he fists his cock to the look of pleasure on your face.
"I-I missed you Simon, so much-" you moaned out desperately as your pussy clenched on nothing. You were ready to beg for his cock again if he needed you to but you didn't have to worry for long when he turned you around, stuffing your pussy with his fat cock from behind.
"Good girl... Such a good fuckin' girl, aren't ya?" His words are so dirty it makes you tighten around him with a stifled moan as he fucks you fast and deep, not giving you a chance to adjust to the new angle he's pounding you in.
You can't respond and all you can even do is moan and take Simon's hard dick stuffing you over and over again. It doesn't take long for you to feel that tight knot forming in your stomach and Simon can feel it too from the way you're starting to tighten around him.
"Gonna cum, baby?" He asks you with a drawn out hum as he kneads your ass, watching the way it jiggles with every thrust.
You nod, moaning into your pillows as you clawed at the sheets. "Cum for me then... Cum on my dick..." He coos, pushing your hips down to give himself a better view of your ass. Your arms give out and you're practically being fucked into the bed.
Simon chuckles, taking your wrists and pulling them towards him suddenly. It makes you gasp when you feel the pressure building in your shoulders when Simon tightens his grip on your wrists.
"Si... M'close..." Your voice comes out choked out and broken, spiking up every time he bullies his cock harshly inside you and makes your eyes roll to the back of your head.
"Don't need to tell me baby, just cum f'me..." He mutters breathlessly, now holding your wrists behind your back with one hand as the other lands a harsh slap to your ass, making you whimper.
You gasp as tears rolled down your cheeks from how overwhelmed you were. "Simon... Simon..." your voice shakes as you struggle against his grip on your wrists. "Do it baby, cum for me..." He hums, giving your ass a loving squeeze.
You dig your nails into the sheets when you finally feel that knot in your stomach unravel, you feel tingly all over as you cum on Simon's cock with a loud moan of his name. It makes you whine when he doesn't stop, chasing his orgasm now when he feels your pussy tighten around him so good.
"Fuck baby... That's it, that's it..." His groan turns into a drawn out moan as he throws his head back. With the way you were clenching down on him, it made him sloppy.
Simon was sounding whiny now while he chased his high. His hands were squeezing your hips as he held you down and fucked you harder into the bed. He was babbling now, about how good you felt and how you were such a good girl. All for him.
"Feel's so good, lovie... Let me cum inside, please?" He whined through gritted teeth, leaning down to kiss your shoulder. "Please let me cum inside? Please, baby... Please..." He moans into your skin desperately, leaving wet open-mouthed kisses on your shoulder.
"Yes... Yes, inside..." You nod desperately, feeling overstimulated after just coming down from your high and now being used by Simon to chase his own climax.
"Oh fuck..." His voice shakes as he cums inside you, painting your walls white with his cum as he gives you a few more hard thrusts to make sure you take all of it.
"Thank you, love... Thank you" he whispers after some time had passed, giving your hips an appreciative squeeze as he slowly pulled out of you. You whined when he finally pulled out, leaving you breathless as you felt his hot cum drip from your pussy to your clit.
"So beautiful..." Simon whispers as he lays beside you, pulling you close to him in a warm hug with your back against his chest. He wraps his arms around his waist and means his head down on your shoulder to give you gentle kisses.
"I love you..." He whispered close to your ear as his hands caressed your body soothingly. You hummed in content as you relaxed in his arms and allowed yourself to move a bit closer.
"I love you too..." You say quietly, rubbing his arms which were wrapped around you. Simon hums and kisses your hair, lingering there to take in your scent. "I won't leave again... I promise" he mumbles against your hair, his arms tightening around you ever so slightly.
You nod, looking over your shoulder to give him a warm smile, you were too tired and spent to talk but you knew Simon would be able to know what you were thinking just by looking into your eyes.
He chuckles and presses a soft kiss to your lips briefly. "And you know what's funny?" He laughed softly, raising a hand to caress your cheek, "It's Valentine's day" he looked over to the window and you followed his eyes.
The sun was starting to rise and it made you scoff that Simon really came back to you at the perfect timing.
"We're staying in, that's for sure" you laughed quietly, feeling your eyelids grow heavy as sleep slowly overtook you, but you didn't feel lonely anymore. Simon was back, and he knew he would never leave again.
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chaotic-mystery · 4 months ago
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Call It What You Want
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pairing: Joel Miller Jackson era x f!reader
summary: Who knew a storm would push you and Joel exactly where you wanted to be but never thought you’d end up?
content warnings: shocker shocker, Mads wrote fluff for once! There’s a slight mention of arson and your house burning down but ya know, the rest of it is fluff. Nicknames, implied age gap but it’s not specified, storms. NO USE OF Y/N.
authors note: this is almost two months late for the lovely @janaispunk 1500 kisses challenge! I couldn’t find my moodboard unfortunately (it was beautiful) so I had to improvise. I got Joel + cheek kiss. It’s short and sweet 🖤 Jana ilysm. || word count: 1.1k || thank u always to @pedgito for beta reading & @wannab-urs for hyping me up to post despite how far I got derailed from life. Ily ily ily.
Two years. It’s been two years living with Joel Miller in Jackson. It wasn’t what you expected, given the week you moved into the smaller house just up the hill, someone decided to burn it down to get you to leave. It wasn’t really the warm welcome like you were promised. Joel was tasked with housing you until they could rebuild or find you somewhere else to shack up. Given he was Tommy’s brother and Tommy was with Maria, no one dared to even mess with anyone close to the Millers.
It took Joel a mere three months to decide he liked keeping you around, it wasn’t so quiet in the house anymore, and he had someone to share his dinner with because he could never figure out after all these years how to cook for one person. Either way, you both liked each other’s company and you didn’t want to live anywhere else. However, there was a mutual agreement between you two of house rules.
Keep up after yourself, do your work and do as you’re told, and no overnight guests.
Even if you didn’t talk about it, the third rule just kind of happened. It was never your house to get comfortable in and over the years you slowly started to feel more relaxed, but it was never going to be yours.
A nasty storm was rolling in during the middle of the night and knowing storms freak you out, especially living in a house surrounded by trees as tall as buildings, you laid in bed staring at the ceiling, contemplating going into Joel’s room to wake him up. You just wanted to be held again, despite you starting to catch feelings for him. You knew the first night you climbed in his bed for relief of knowing you weren’t alone in the house, this was going to fuck you up. You just wanted to feel someone else there with you, anyone. It just so happened to be Joel who was half asleep but more than willing to let you sleep in his bed as long as you didn’t try anything with him.
With each sunrise, you’d wake up in his arms and his head nuzzled into your neck from behind. Had Joel known what was happening or how you’d wake up tangled in each other, he’d make a big deal about it and not let you come in during the middle of the night anymore. Before he’d open his eyes you’d crawl out of his room to let him think you left hours ago.
A ginormous crack of lightning lights up your bedroom and follows with booms of thunder loud enough to rattle the windows and causes you to jolt up in your bed.
You grab your blanket and run into Joel’s room, skipping the knocking that normally wakes him up. He jumps awake, fear coursing his veins as he looks around the dark room and seeing you standing there from the small flashes of lightning.
“What’s the matter?!” He asks and swings his legs over the side of the bed closest to you.
“There’s a storm and-”
“C’mon, get in here.” He lays back down and lifts the covers up, not aware you had your blanket.
Still, you jump in under them and lay your blanket over the top. He knew you were scared of storms, it was all he needed to know as to why you busted in the way you did. With no second thought, Joel’s arms wrap around your body, pulling you against his chest to console you.
“It’s okay, you’re okay. I’ve gotcha.” He murmurs tiredly as he rubs your back gently to soothe you.
His warm palms smooth over your t-shirt covering your shoulder, almost sucking all the anxiety right out of your body.
“I’ll forgive you for barging in here like that, even if you did scare the shit outta me.” His chin lays right on top of your head, tucking you in closer than you’ve ever been to him. Did he always smell this good and you’re just now realizing?
“I’m sorry, yeah I probably should’ve knocked. I’m sorry.” You try to cover your face in embarrassment but he catches your movements and tugs your arm down, tightening his grip on you as he rocks back and forth trying to get you to laugh.
“No no no, cut it out. I’m just messin with you. C’mon, get some sleep. Long day tomorrow.”
You couldn’t stop staring at the skin on his neck and thinking about how badly you wanted to kiss him. Cuddling with him never went further than what it was because if it did, you’d have to talk about what you two were and that would completely ruin everything.
“But I’m not tired now.”
“Too bad, if you just stop yappin’ you’ll get tired.”
“But-“
His hand comes up gently to your face and squeezes your cheeks together to keep you from finishing your thought. Your adrenaline was pumping as you could feel his face get closer to yours and his breath tickling your skin. A ghost of a kiss was pressed to your cheek, followed by him saying goodnight once more.
Your entire body was on vibrate, hands cemented to your torso where they’ve been since you climbed into his bed. Joel’s hand never left your face as he started to drift off to sleep but his grip loosened.
“Joel.” you whisper
No answer. You shuffle under him and he stirs softly.
“Joel.”
“What's the matter, kid?”
“Why’d you kiss me?”
Bracing yourself for him to kick you out for talking too much, you hold out for an answer and to your surprise, he answers.
“Because I wanted to.” He grumbles and blinks open his eyes, the thunder still rumbling outside.
Biting your lip trying to decide if you should keep going, to give into your temptations and tell him what you’re thinking about.
“What if I want you to kiss me…like…for real? Would you?” You shuffle around as he sits up enough to prop his arm up and hold his head steady in your direction.
“Why would you want that?”
You didn’t know how to answer. Maybe it was the mixed signals you were getting, the looks you’d catch from Joel every time he saw you talking to a guy, or maybe you just really wanted him to kiss you. It had been forever for you too, since someone glittered your skin with delicate kisses and touches from angels and every day that passed, it grew stronger and twined itself with whatever this was with Joel.
“If you’re going to kiss me, I’d rather have a proper one.” You whisper and the flash of lightning lights Joel’s face, exposing the stupid smirk on his face.
What happened that night was going to stay between you two, even if it meant complicating everything.
Thank u for reading! 🖤
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hopelesslygaysstuff · 9 months ago
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pairing: wanda maximoff x fem!reader
summary: wanda maximoff, your domme and girlfriend, tests you with impossible rules, and subsequently punishes you for failing to follow them.
content warnings: obvi smut, restraints, impact play, edging, cunnilingus.
word count: 4k+
masterlist
original request
comments and reblogs are always appreciated! happy reading ♡
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My Good Girl
The afternoon sun cast warm hues through the floor-to-ceiling window, illuminating the cozy office and casting soft shadows across the floor. Wanda sat at her desk, fingers absentmindedly tapping on the dark wood. Lines of text filled her screen, yet her mind was elsewhere. 
With a soft hum of contemplation, Wanda closed the laptop, a soft click breaking through the peaceful silence of the room. 
‘I want to try something new tonight.’
The text is sent with a soft sound, and Wanda traces her phone slowly as she waits for you to read the message. Her mind is thrown back to the plethora of information she’d spent the better half of the afternoon consuming. 
Agatha, one of her closest friends, and a well-known domme, had sent her a few websites to check out. Wanda had let it slip during one of their wine nights that although she was happy with you and the dom/sub relationship you’d built, she wanted to try something more. 
You were perfect. Truly. Submissive, and willing to do whatever she said. Wanda loved the thrill she got whenever you obeyed an order. 
But you were almost too perfect. 
One of the sites she’d pursued was full of dominants sharing the ways they put a bratty sub in their place. Wanda had found herself growing wetter with each post she scrolled through. Her mind had found itself wandering over to you. 
You, tears welling up as she choked you with her strap. You, pulling uselessly on scarlet ribbon restraints as she teased you for hours. You, with your face scrunched up as she twisted and pulled on your nipples until you begged her for mercy. 
The word mommy, slipping from your lips as you blushed. 
Wanda had to take several breaks throughout her afternoon, her fingers slipping below her waistband and sliding over the slick arousal coating her panties. She’d thought of you while rubbing herself to a climax, imagining your wide eyes as you knelt before her…
Fuck. She was getting worked up again. 
Her phone dinged, and Wanda had to physically shake herself while she scrambled for her phone. Her fingers trembled as she unlocked the phone, seeing your message. 
‘Of course we can! What did you have in mind?’
You were so eager to please, so willing to succumb to anything Wanda asked of you. She took a few deep breaths, typing out her response with one hand while quickly packing her bag. 
‘When I get home, I want you naked and kneeling by the door. You will address me as ma’am, nothing else. Understood?’
Wanda could feel herself slipping into her dominant headspace, the thrill of giving orders rushing through her. 
‘And if I break one of those rules?’
Oh, it was almost too easy.
‘I’ll have to punish you, darling. I’m on my way home. Remember my instructions.’
Slipping her phone into her pocket, Wanda cast one last look around her office before turning out the light. Locking up, she strode quickly down the hall, thankfully not seeing any other employees around. 
The car ride home was agonizing, the heat between her legs growing into an unbearable inferno. Wanda couldn’t help but squeeze her thighs together at the thought of you breaking her rules. 
And she knew just the thing to distract you and cause you to slip up. 
At a stoplight just outside the city, about five minutes from your shared home, Wanda pulled out her phone. Knowing the light would take a while to turn green, she pulled up the locked photo album hidden in her files. Selecting a photo, she quickly sent it to you with no caption. 
The photo was a selfie, the phone propped up against her work computer. Wanda had popped a few too many buttons, the lace of her red bra peeking out from underneath her silk shirt and jacket. Her eyes were locked on the camera, iridescent and smoldering, while the fingers of one hand were wrapped tightly around her tie, pulling it away from her neck. The other hand was resting on her belt, a single finger slipping beneath the waistband of her dress pants. 
Wanda let her imagination run wild, imagining the flush creeping up your neck and coloring your face. Your breath would catch, pupils dilating as arousal shot through you. By the time you positioned yourself at the door, your juices would be smeared all over your delicate inner thighs, your eyes pleading and desperate. 
The light turned green, and Wanda refocused. Only a few minutes until she'd be home. 
The anticipation was killing her. 
Wanda forced herself to slow her gait, walking leisurely up the steps to the front door. Her heels clicked on the pavement and she hoped that you could hear her approaching. 
The door clicked open, the key sliding easily into the lock. 
Green eyes found you easily, a pleased smile stretching across those beautiful lips as Wanda observed your kneeling form. Your eyes were just as wide as she’d hoped, your irises disappearing as your pupils dilated further at the sight of her. 
“Hello, darling.”
Wanda made sure to pitch her voice low, a sultry tone making its way through her words. Her gaze pierced yours, a silent demand hidden within them. 
“Good afternoon, ma’am.” Your voice shook, and you sucked in a shaky breath. 
Your hands were placed atop your thighs, palms flat as you subtly parted your thighs. Wanda caught a glimpse of the shiny arousal coating your inner thighs, and she breathed deeply, hoping your scent would envelop her. 
“How was your day, sweetheart?” Wanda asked, setting her bag down and slipping her jacket off her shoulders. She hung it up, flicking her fingers in silent order for you to follow. 
“It was good, um, ma’am.” You stuttered, crawling after her as she made her way towards the living room. 
Seating herself on the couch, Wanda crossed one leg elegantly over the other. You crawled up to her, eyes glancing between her lips and legs. You sat up, posture straight and palms flat, with your fingers thrumming nervously on your thighs. 
“And what did my good girl do today?” Wanda smirked at you. 
“Oh, I uh…” Your eyes grew distant as you tried to force yourself to focus. “I worked a little bit, and then I made some meal prep for the week, ma’am.”
Wanda raised an eyebrow, “Anything else?”
You wracked your brain, trying to remember what you’d done that day. The only thing running through your mind was the insatiable picture Wanda had sent you. Your mind focused on the captivating curve of her breasts, the smoldering look in her eyes, similar to the one she was giving you now. 
“Oh!” You remembered something, excitement weaving its way through your words. “I made you something!”
Wanda paused for a moment, seemingly waiting for something, but you were looking up at her with wide eyes and a satisfied grin. 
“Aren’t you forgetting something?” You could sense the satisfaction in Wanda’s voice, and faltered. 
“Ma’am.” You blurted out, but Wanda was already shaking her head. 
“Too late, darling.” 
You paled slightly, but Wanda could see the excitement glowing in your eyes. You were curious, anticipation thrumming through you. The flush on your face was slowly growing darker, the tips of your ears burning as the weight of Wanda’s gaze settled on you. 
“Bedroom, now. You know what position I like you in.”
A punishment. That’s what you were receiving. You hadn’t had one of those in a long time, not since the beginning of your relationship with Wanda. 
“Yes ma’am.” Your voice was quiet, and you stood, watching Wanda for any sign of disapproval. When she gave none, you turned and headed toward the bedroom, aware of her gaze burning on your hips. 
Approaching the bed, you let your hand caress the soft silk of the comforter. Kneeling on top of the mattress, you take a steadying breath, listening for the click of Wanda’s heels. 
You don’t have to wait for long. The slow, measured steps of Wanda’s confident gait reach your ears, and you subconsciously straighten your back. Ensuring that your gaze is locked on your hands, you resist the urge to look up when the soft light from the hallway hits your eyes as Wanda enters the room.
“Such a good girl.” Wanda’s voice is soft, and you feel some of your arousal leak out and drip down your thighs. 
You don’t speak, knowing that Wanda likes to command every part of you, including your words. Instead, you offer a small smile, eyes locked on her form as she walks toward the closet. She disappears inside, throwing a smile over her shoulder.
A whimper threatens to escape you, but you choke it down. If Wanda heard one errant sound from you, she’d surely increase your punishment. That’s the last thing you want, so you simply resist the urge to shift on the bed and wait. 
The minutes stretch on, and you mentally curse your girlfriend out. You knew she was doing this on purpose, building up the anticipation. You want to call out, but your words get stuck in your throat, not wanting to add to your punishment. 
So you wait, your arousal building with each minute until the sheets below you are damp. 
You hear the door open, the heady presence of Wanda Maximoff filling the room. The sheer dominance that she emanates washes over you, loosening your muscles as your head grows fuzzier. 
You can trust her. Wanda only wants what’s best for you. 
“You’re doing so well for me, love,” Wanda says, moving onto the bed and kneeling before you. She’s still fully clothed, her buttoned shirt brushing against your skin in a tantalizing dance as she sets a few items beside her. You don’t dare look, keeping your eyes trained on your hands until she commands you otherwise. 
“Look at me.”
Green eyes seem slightly softer in the dim light, and you search them for any clue of what the night entails. 
“Tell me why I’m punishing you,” The words jumpstart your brain, and you begin speaking as Wanda picks up a silky, scarlet ribbon. 
“I forgot one of your rules, I’m sorry, mo…” The word almost slips from your lips, but you clench them shut. 
Wanda raises an eyebrow at you, almost daring you to continue. You remain silent, still not ready to use the title you want. Your mind wars with itself, the waves of indecision subsiding when Wanda gently smiles at you and brushes her fingers lightly against your cheek.
Her eyes are soft, and you know that she won’t press the topic. Not until you’re ready. 
“And which rule was that?”
“I forgot to call you ma’am, I’m sorry,” You say, your voice earnest. 
At your practically whimpered words, Wanda has already forgiven you. However, the thought of punishing you is far too tantalizing, so she picks up one of the silk ribbons. 
“And you know what this is, correct?” 
“Yes ma’am,” You won’t be forgetting her title anytime soon, and Wanda feels pride shoot through her at your steadfast obedience. She gently pushes you backwards, until you realize what she’s doing. 
Positioning yourself on your back, you stretch your arms out toward the headboard, enjoying the feel of the scarlet ribbon around your wrist as Wanda begins to restrain you. Your clit pulses when she tightens the ribbon securely, and you fight the urge to roll your hips.
Quickly fastening your other wrist to the headboard, Wanda waits for you to test the strength. She smirks while you writhe beneath her, attempting to escape. You squirm, your hips restrained by her thighs as she sits atop you, her fingernails scraping lightly down your sides before you give up. 
“Thank you, ma’am.” You say, and Wanda’s eyes light up in pleasure. 
In one smooth movement, she flips you over, her fingers digging into your hips as she roughly positions you on your stomach. Your wrists cross over each other at the change of position, her hands pulling your body down until you can barely move an inch. 
A hand on the back of your head shoves your face into a soft pillow, and you turn your cheek slightly to be able to breathe. Wanda doesn't seem to notice, her attention focused on the item she now holds in her hand. 
You catch a glimpse of the paddle and whine. It’s been a while since she’s used that toy on you, and you vividly remember the last experience. You hadn’t been able to sit down for three days. 
“Remember your colors, sweetheart.” Wanda reminds you, and you nod into the pillow as her hand gently squeezes the flesh of your ass. 
The first strike takes you by surprise, and your body jolts, attempting to escape the sharp sting. You hear Wanda chuckling above you and can practically feel her eyes appraising the bright red mark that the paddle left. Before you’ve recovered from the first hit, the paddle swings down again, pain and pleasure mixing as she strategically places marks across your whole backside. 
When the paddle hits the sensitive skin of your upper thigh, you let out a yelp. 
“Darling?” Wanda asks. You can’t formulate a response and your breaths are heavy and fast. You tug at the restraints, a soft green tumbling past your lips. 
The hits are quick and hard, pain radiating through you even as your clit throbs. You can feel your juices dripping down your thighs and soaking the sheet beneath you. The humiliation of the situation only turns you on more, and it’s not long before you’re moaning softly into the pillow. 
A heavy sigh makes its way through you when Wanda pauses, setting the paddle down beside you. “Color,” She demands, her hands cool against your abused flesh. 
“Green, thank… thank you,” Your words are breathy, stuttering when Wanda’s fingers graze your slit. 
A single finger circles your clit, and you can’t help but push your ass upwards, trying to appease the tension between your legs. 
“Oh,” Wanda says, her voice full of mirth. “It seems like you want more, love.”
Nodding frantically, you roll your hips forward. 
A sharp pain makes its way through you, Wanda’s hand coming down quickly against your sensitive backside. You let out a half moan, half yelp at the action. 
“Don’t rut against the bed like a pathetic mutt,” She practically growls, bringing her hand down sharply a few more times. “You’re practically begging for a punishment.”
You want to complain, you want to whine about the injustice of it all. Instead, you remain quiet, not wanting to risk more pain. You can feel Wanda shifting, and bite your lip when the cool leather of the paddle drags across your overheated backside. 
“Do you want more?” Wanda asks, and you can’t do anything but nod. You turn your head, peeking at her from the corner of your eye. Her green eyes are locked on the swell of your ass, and you shudder at the hungry look in them. 
“Beg for it.”
The paddle presses against your clit, the pressure sending pleasure coursing through you. Resisting the urge to grind against it, you grit your teeth and speak. “Please, ma’am. I want you to hit me. Punish me, please, I’ve been a bad girl.”
Wanda doesn’t respond, instead raising the paddle and delivering more blows to your aching backside. 
You begin to moan, the pain morphing into a sick sort of pleasure. With each blow, your clit is pressed against the mattress, your orgasm approaching rapidly. You know better than to beg, you’d learned long ago that Wanda liked to control every aspect of your pleasure, including when you were allowed to cum. 
“Are you close?” Wanda asks, not giving you a chance to respond before she continues to speak, “I can see you dripping onto the sheets, your hips rutting pathetically of their own will. Do you want to cum, baby? Do you want to cum while mommy hits you with the paddle?”
The words worm their way into your mind, twisting your thoughts while pleasure and pain consume your being. Her hits don’t cease, the leather paddle slapping against you over and over again. 
The pillow is damp beneath your cheek. You hadn’t realized that you’d begun to cry, and a whine escaped your mouth without your permission. It only spurs Wanda on. 
“Oh, you like this, don’t you darling? You like being mommy’s little fucktoy, taking whatever I give you. Say it.”
You barely register her words, something incoherent spewing from your mouth as she delivers the harshest blows of the night. One of Wanda’s hands tangles with your hair, wrenching your head up from the pillow. 
“Say it.” Her voice is deadly, low, and raspy. You don’t dare disobey. 
“I like it, I like it when you treat me like this. Please don’t stop. Please, fuck.” You cut yourself off, feeling Wanda swing the paddle harshly at the curse word. 
“Mommy, please.”
Relief. Your brain starts to work again. The pain radiating from your backside subsides slightly as Wanda drops the paddle to the floor. You feel as though you should be embarrassed, but don’t. 
Truth be told, you’ve wanted to call Wanda by that title for a while, and at this moment, it just felt right. 
“Say that again for me, darling.” 
You feel your body being manhandled again, your hips twisting until you’re on your back again. Green eyes stare down at you, a slightly dazed look in them. Wanda’s fingers trace patterns on your ribcage, moving up to tease your nipples while she waits. 
“Mommy,” Your voice is quiet, almost shy, but the word is genuine. “Please let me cum.”
Wanda can’t bring herself to punish you any longer. Not after you’ve finally used the title she’s been yearning for. She finds herself suddenly incapable of speaking, the words catching in her throat. 
Surging forward, Wanda presses her impossibly soft lips to yours. Her tongue dances against yours, tracing your lips and drawing soft moans from you. You fight the urge to roll your hips, her thigh pressed perfectly against your center. 
Her tongue explores your mouth for what seems like forever, and you find yourself growing wetter with each minute. You can’t complain, though. Kissing Wanda will always be something you treasure. 
Eventually, the need for air becomes too great, and Wanda pulls back. Her eyes search yours, a smile slowly stretching across her face. 
“Good girl,” She coos, a hand reaching up and cupping your cheek. “Thank you, sweetheart,”
You grin, sure that your eyes are sparkling as you gaze up at her. From this angle, she looks almost angelic, with her hair falling around you. You don’t mind, if you could choose anything to worship, Wanda would be the first and only thing on your list. 
“I’m going to make you feel really good now, okay?” She says, not giving you a chance to respond before she’s descending your body. She leaves open-mouthed kisses on your skin, enjoying the way you jolt beneath her whenever she nips you with her teeth.
The bruises she leaves behind fill her with pride and a hint of possessiveness, and she gazes up at you when her mouth finally reaches the glistening heat between your thighs. 
“Please,” You whisper, throwing your head back when her tongue applies gentle pressure against your clit. 
It’s practically torture, her skilled mouth alternating between sucking and licking your clit as your orgasm approaches quickly. You want to reach down and tangle your fingers with her hair, pulling her flush against you, and tug uselessly at your restraints. 
Your hips twitch violently, a sign that you’re close to an orgasm. A few… more… strokes of that talented tongue…
Wanda pulls away, and you whine loudly. Her fingers twist your nipple harshly in response, and you mumble a quick apology. 
“None of that,” Wanda reprimands, “you take whatever I give you, remember?”
She doesn’t give you a chance to respond, burying her head between your thighs before you can fully catch your breath. This time, she sucks your clit violently, red-hot bolts of pleasure shooting through you as your thighs tense. 
Her mouth disappears. 
Giving you a few moments to recover, Wanda watches the realization enter your eyes. You mumble, “You’re going to edge me, aren’t you?”
Chuckling, Wanda circles your clit with a single finger. She watches your eyes gloss over as your hips twitch. Pressing harder, she moves rhythmically over the hard nub, enjoying the moans reverberating around the room. You tense up, lips parting as your orgasm draws near…
“Only good girls get to cum, darling,” Wanda pulls her fingers fully away from you. 
You want to scream. You want to curse her out, you want to escape your restraints and hump her thigh until you cum. You want to…
A moan claws its way out from your chest, and Wanda takes that as a sign to continue. 
You don’t know how long she edges you, the only thing you’re aware of is the growing arousal between your thighs and the pleasure that builds and builds and dissipates whenever Wanda senses that you’re close. 
After a while, the fuzziness takes over your mind, and you lose count of the edges as Wanda’s tongue relentlessly works against your core. She keeps her fingers locked around your thighs, refusing to give your pussy any sort of real satisfaction. 
Practically crazed with arousal and desperation, you attempt to roll your hips against Wanda’s lips. 
“Do you want me to bring the paddle out again?” Wanda raises a single eyebrow, her hand raising and striking your swollen pussy. The sting shoots through your clit, and you jerk your hips as you recoil from the pain. 
“No, I’m sorry mommy. Please…” You moan as Wanda’s warm mouth encircles your clit. “Please forgive me.”
Time blends with the countless edges, and you find yourself lost in a pleasurable vanilla haze. The only thing you’re aware of is Wanda. Her tongue, building you up. Her eyes, watching you as her fingers hold your thighs and hips against the mattress. Her scent, an addicting drug that you never want to abstain from. 
Your orgasm, just barely out of reach. Wanda, bringing you closer and closer and…
You open your eyes, your vision seeming sharper than before. Warm water surrounds you, suds covering your chest as a warm washcloth gently rubs against your collarbone.
“Mommy?” 
Wanda moves into your field of vision, her eyes filled with concern. You smile widely, relaxing further into the water. You want to reach up and pull her face closer, yearning to feel her lips against yours, but your limbs don’t seem to work properly. 
“Hi, sweetheart. You scared me,” Wanda’s voice is soft, and you can sense the worry underneath her accent. 
“I’m alright, I promise,” You reassure her, resting your head against the side of the tub. “But…” Trailing off, you watch Wanda’s brows furrow in concern. 
“I still really want to cum.” 
Wanda scoffs, splashing you lightly as you laugh. Allowing yourself to fully relax, you let her wash away your sweat, her hands gentle as she scrubs the dried arousal off your thighs. 
“You don’t get to cum tonight, I'm punishing you.” Wanda sounds like she’s about to whine, and you splash her. The water droplets cling to her hair, and you laugh at her pout, your arms working again as you pull her in by the neck for a kiss.
Her tongue dances languidly alongside yours, and you push down the arousal that attempts to rise. Honestly, you’d get aroused if Wanda simply walked into a room. With her lips on yours, it’s much harder to tamper your desperation for her. 
“Maybe tomorrow,” Wanda mumbles against your lips, and you roll your eyes. 
Eventually, Wanda ends the impromptu makeout session, finishing the bath and drying you off. She applies some aloe vera to your sore backside, kissing the marks softly as she does so. 
You’ve never felt more loved. 
Sliding in between fresh, cool sheets, Wanda pulls you flush against her. Your head is comfortably nestled in the crook of her neck, and you can feel her heartbeat against your palm. 
Gentle lips kiss the top of your head, and you feel yourself drifting off. Wanda hums, murmuring one final thing before you finally succumb to the waves of drowsiness washing over you. 
“Happy Valentine's Day, my love.”
---
Dm or comment to be added!
Taglist: @alexawynters @msvenablesbitch @marilynthornhilllover @lifespectator @milkeeteaa @imnotawitch @marvels--slut @justabrokensunshine @dorabledewdroop @wandsmxmff @esposadejoyhuerta
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myfictionaldreams · 11 months ago
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Merry Christmas // Mafia!Stucky x Fem!Reader
Summary: It was a simple question: Have you been naughty or nice this year?
Tags: 18+ readers only, smut, dom/sub, costumes/roleplay, rough oral (f and m receiving), rough sex, size kink, praise kink, choking, sir kink, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, subspace, aftercare
A/N: Hello everyone! Sorry, it's been a while since I've posted; I promise to get back to requests at some point. Until then, I just wanted to post a little something and to say Merry Christmas to those who celebrate and Happy Holidays to everyone else!
Words: 2.8k
my masterlist 📚 AO3 Link
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Winter was one of your utterly favourite months just for moments like the one you were currently experiencing. The snow layered thickly against the outside of your home, causing a darkened shadow on the inside, which only meant that the blazing fire lit the sitting area in beautiful deep orange and red. The sweet smell of hot cocoa wafted from the kitchen, only making your smile grow as you pulled the fluffy blanket further up your body until the only exposed part of you was your face.
Your back nuzzled further into the soft cushions of the coach you were waiting patiently on, watching the movie with half interest as the comfort of the moment had you wanting to drift into sleep. What’s more was that the meetings that had been planned for later in the evening had inevitably been cancelled due to the freezing weather, which meant that you knew you could sit in with your two boyfriends without the fear of them being out on the dangerous roads, just to attend a threatening meeting.
They were home. Safe. With you.
Blinking open an eye and looking around the room, it dawned on you that they’d been gone from your side for so long that the parts of the cushions they’d been sitting on had turned cold. You’d been drifting between sleep and trying to cuddle closer to them for an hour when Bucky shifted, causing a groan to burst from your throat.
He’d simply kissed your temple tenderly, earning a much-deserved smile in return as he explained that he would make the three of you hot cocoa. Steve had then mumbled something about helping him, but you were too busy trying to reposition your body and get used to not having them squishing either side of you.
Sitting up slightly on the couch, you glanced briefly over the back towards where the kitchen was to see if you could spot either Steve or Bucky, but neither were in sight.
“What’s taking you both so long? I’m getting so cold and lonely out here without you”, you shouted idly with a hint of a whine for emphasis. As you stared up at the TV attached to the wall above the fireplace, you contemplated what film the three of you could watch tonight when you became distracted by the footsteps coming from the kitchen. Frowning, you began to shout, “What took you both so … long?”
Any words you were thinking of asking were swiftly forgotten as your view of the TV was replaced by both of your boyfriends, each standing in oversized Santa trousers, each held up by black suspenders over their shoulders. The red velvet material that covered their strong legs was cuffed with thick white fluff around the ankles and waistline. However, your attention wasn’t forced on this as your eyes squinted, not quite believing the detail; “Have you oiled your chests?” you asked quietly, throat suddenly thick with saliva.
Bucky smirked, tensing his pecs so that you could see the oil's gleam better in the fire's orange light. In any other situation, you might have laughed at the fact that they looked like wannabe Santa strippers, but your pussy was being a traitor with the deep pulse that had your thighs clenching with the desperate need to find some relief.
The baby oil that covered the top half of their naked body seemed to extenuate the god-like bodies they both had, the muscles over their arms and abs flexing with the subtle movements they were both making. Even Bucky’s metal arm was oiled, causing the silver shade to shimmer and gleam.
Your head swivelled between admiring the both of them, unsure what to say or how to act. Thankfully, Steve was the first to speak, his thumbs hooking into the base of the black suspenders as he asked in a deep, gravely voice, “Have you been naughty or nice this year?”
Your lips automatically flicked up at the corners to a teasing smile, but the single eyebrow raised by Steve had you falling right into the trap. All the thoughts that had crossed your mind to laugh and joke with them had quickly melted into the submissive, needy girlfriend that they both wanted.
“Um, nice - I think, " you respond before biting your lower lip, a move that had both Steve and Bucky reaching forward, but the latter made first contact, his metal thump gently easing out the lip from between your teeth.
“Nice huh? You sure about that, Doll?” Bucky asked, his fingers firmly holding your chin so you could not look away from him.
You shivered as Steve eased away the blanket, and even though the room wasn’t cold, the sensations pulsing through your core had your body overreacting. Your eyes had drifted over to Steve, who had squatted to be closer to your height, but a sharp tug on your chin from Bucky had your attention back on him as you tried to form the words to respond to him. “Ye-yes. Yes, I’ve been nice”.
A sharp gasp left your mouth as a quick tug of your nipple from Steve had your body shifting upright. With your arousal building, your nipples had pebbled beneath the thin, oversized top that you wore. Bucky’s eyes seemed to darken as he watched your reaction, the subtle way your hips ground on the couch.
“Really? Because from what I’ve seen, it looks like you’re being a very naughty girl right now. Tell me, Sweetheart, what do you want for Christmas?”
“You”, your response was instantaneous, and it seemed to be the correct answer with the way Bucky smiled down at you before releasing your chin.
“Well, it still remains to be seen if you’ve really been a good girl”, Bucky emphasised the last two words, knowing just how those words stroke the deep praise kink that further warmed your pussy, your wetness beginning to coat your lips and drench your shorts.
“Pl-please let me prove it. I want to be both of yours, good girl.” You look between where Bucky still stood above you, and Steve knelt at your side.
“That’s the thing, Sweetheart. The boss down there seems to agree with you. He thinks you’ve been a good girl all year round for his treats, but me? I’m not convinced; I think I need you to show me just how good you can be”, Bucky explains with darkness lacing his words. “Stand up”, he orders, full of authority. You do, being careful not to knock into Steve as you stand with enough speed that you are somewhat lightheaded. Both of their hands were on you in a split second. Steve grabbed the waistline of your shorts, and Bucky pulled the shirt up and over your head until the two of them had you standing completely bare.
Ungracefully, Bucky pushed against your shoulder, forcing you to sit back onto the warm cushions, looking up at him with wide eyes. A gentle tremor was pulsing through your body with anticipation of what was to come. Your cunt would have been soaked just from the way they were both acting, but with the outfits as well, you were near feral with need.
Bucky’s warm hand gently wrapped around your throat, his thumb and forefinger on either side of your neck, feeling the galloping pace of your heartbeat as you stared up at him. “Will you do everything I say?” he asks with a more gentler tone than before.
“Yes, sir”, you say, voice laced with desperation.
“Good, then I need you to ignore everything that Boss is going to do to you. The only thing I want you to do is to keep your eyes on me”.
“Yes, sir”.
With great ease, Bucky pushed against your neck, forcing you to sit back correctly against the cushions as he began to stand on the couch, just as Steve moved between your legs on the floor, lifting them until your legs lay over his shoulders.
With the oil, your legs wanted to slip off, so his massive hands had to grip onto the flesh of your thighs, keeping them thoroughly in place as he lowered his face to the heat and wetness that was begging for his touch.
As his tongue caressed the length of your pussy, drinking down the juices you’d seeped in the moments of seeing them in the outfits, your moan was cut off by the light squeeze around your throat from Bucky as he subtly reminded you of his demand. Your eyes moved away from Steve and up to the tall, foreboding figure above you as Bucky’s metal hand drifted to his suspenders, pushing them off each shoulder.
“Remember what I said. I want you to ignore him down there and keep your eyes on me. Now, why don’t you prove to me why you should be on the nice list?”. 
You were unsure if, by ignoring, he meant for you not to moan or react to Steve’s tongue as it circled your swollen bundle of nerves, but it was damn near impossible to be silent as the waves of toe-curling pleasure sparked through your core. However, your mouth was now salivating for another reason as Bucky pushed the red velvet material down his hips until midthigh, and the thick, veined cock of your boyfriend was throbbing in the air before your face.
Resting your hands on Bucky’s thicks and licking your lips whilst also trying not to crush Steve with your thighs, you willed Bucky to come closer with a pathetic squeak. Thankfully, he removed his hand from your throat and rested it on the back of the couch, using it to lower his body and directing his cock to your mouth. You didn’t waste a second before licking around the tip, gathering all the precum into your mouth before swallowing the salty goodness down, swiftly followed by a few inches of his hard length.
Bucky’s sigh was praise enough to have you feeling sated and happy as you began to pleasure him with your tongue and mouth, almost matching the movements of Steve between your legs.
“That’s it, just a little more; I know you can take it”, Bucky encouraged with a firm hand on the back of your head. As his cock reached the back of your throat and the overwhelming urge to gag overcame you, you attempted to relax your throat to take him deeper, which thankfully worked, ignoring the tears that now lined your eyes from the stimulation.
It didn’t help matters that your throat kept spasming with the moans and whines from Steve’s treatment of your pussy. He was eating you like the man was starved. Devouring is the best way to describe the way he was licking you out. His tongue changed from delving into the depths of your soaking cunt, twisting and turning to stimulate all the nerves within, just to then pull out and his teeth to gently graze your clit, causing a throb from your walls which was the gently eased by his tongue once more.
It took almost no time at all before you were cumming into his mouth with a flush of heat and added wetness that coated his chin and cheeks. Steve didn’t stop, though, and used your overstimulation post-orgasm to draw you closer to a second orgasm.
Your nails digging into the soft material of Bucky’s Santa trousers helped to keep your ground and not drown in the overwhelming length that was still forcing down your throat. With all the time you’d been with Steve and Bucky, you’d thankfully been able to train your throat to be fucked and take more of their length compared to when you were first with Steve.
This feat was a minor miracle because when Bucky began to take control of the situation and gyrated his hips so that he was now just straight-up, fucking your throat, it meant that you were able to breathe through your nose at the correct times without panicking.
Saliva had filled your mouth from the fucking and was steadily dripping down your chin, causing obscene sloppy noises to come from you, but this only added more praising groans from Bucky as you knew he loved a sloppy blowjob.
“Fuck, you’re being such a good girl, Doll. Remember what I said, eyes on me only”. You tried to nod, but the cock in your mouth hindered your movements as your eyes remained focused on the buzz-cut brunette standing over you.
This became more difficult as you noticed movement out of the corner of your eye as you came for the third time. Steve was beginning to straighten his height but remained on his knees; however, your legs were lowered until wrestling around his waist, but his grip remained tight and firm, keeping them in place.
Without warning, immense pressure and stretching of your cunt began to contort your body as Steve began to fuck into your cunt. Thankfully Bucky pulled out enough that you could gasp without his cock filtering the noise as your eyes clenched shut from the welcomed intrusion. Inch after inch filled your empty hole until his hips were flush against yours.
As you and Steve both released a relieved sigh, the dominating hand on the back of your head began to firmly tug your lips closer to Bucky’s cock once more until you were full with both of them.
The two worked together like they did in every aspect of the word. One of them remained in your body as the other pulled out. In out, in out, they fucked you until you were a trembling, wet mess.
Thankfully, now, they were both heavily praising you, which was like sweet music to your ears.
“Taking my cock so well”.
“Fuck, you always make me feel so good. Yes, just like that”.
“Such a good girl, Doll. I know you wanna cum on Steve’s cock; do it. Cum for him”.
You did. Many times, in fact. Steve had you cuming so many times that you’d lost count as a sweet warmth wrapped around your brain, leaving you feeling like you weren’t in your mundane house anymore but amongst the clouds, floating endlessly in pleasure. Your hands had dropped to your side as all of your energy was now being reserved for sucking Bucky’s cock and taking the punishing pace of Steve’s.
Eventually, Steve was the first to cum with a harsh grunt and snap of his hips as heat and thick wetness flooded into your cunt. He remained in place, holding your legs around his waist as his cock began to soften.
Bucky’s chest was now glistening with both sweat and oil as his eyebrows pinched together, his cheeks rosy with a flush as he groaned deeply, “I’m cumming, holy shit-”. You did gag this time as his entire cock bulged into your throat, the whisps of trimmed hair on his pubic mount tickling your nose as he came.
You worked hard to swallow every drop of him down until your lungs were burning for breath, and he gently eased out of your aching jaw. Your mouth tingled as you licked your swollen lips, sure that if you tried to talk now, all that you’d be able to achieve is a dreadful, deep, gravely voice.
Bucky leapt off the couch, disappearing into another direction you were too tired to follow. Thankfully, Steve remained with you as he carefully repositioned the two of you so that he now sat in the middle of the seat and had you sitting in his lap. Your head felt heavy as it lulled against his slipped chest, but you still hummed in contentment as he kissed your forehead sweetly whilst wrapping his strong hands around your shoulders.
“Hey, Sweetheart, I need you to drink some of this; it’ll help your throat”, Bucky encouraged a few moments later as he sat next to the two of you with a mug of steaming hot cocoa. Steve helped lift your head as Bucky held the drink out, tipping it slightly so that you could drink a couple of sips, moaning at the chocolatey sweet taste and the warmth that did soothe your sore throat.
“Well done, just a little more”, Steve whispered against your cheek as he lay delicate kisses against your sensitive skin.
Finally, with the drink gone, Bucky leaned closer to you, giving your lips a much-deserved kiss before pulling away with a cheeky glint in his eye. “So, do you like the outfits? They were Nat’s idea. Pretty sure she meant it as a joke”, he wondered out loud, but your giggle and nod recaptured his attention.
“I loved them”, you whispered with a voice thick with tiredness and evidence from being thoroughly fucked.
“Good, because I can’t wait to see what you’ll look like in the outfit we bought you. We think you’d be the perfect match to be Mrs Clause, but I must admit, there was significantly less material”, Steve explained as his fingers massaged into your still aching legs.
“I can’t wait, but maybe tomorrow”, you admit tiredly, relaxing further into the arms of both of them. 
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temiizpalace · 3 months ago
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Hello! I was wondering (if I'm doing this right) if I could request for the fighting event?
Could I request number 4 (TAKE MY JACKET, I INSIST.) with Leona Kingscholar "fighting" (maybe a hint for that?) with Jack Howl who offers Yuu a jacket without even being asked for one?
Thank you!
☆┊TAKE MY JACKET, I INSIST. (🐺 vs. 🦁)
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SUMMARY: COLD CHILLS RAN DOWN YOUR SPINE AS YOUR TEMPERATURE BEGINS TO DROP. HE OFFERS HIS JACKET LIKE A GENTLEMEN, BUT A CERTAIN SOMEONE HAD THE SAME IDEA.
CHARACTERS: jack howl vs. leona kingscholar
EVENT MASTERLIST
WARNINGS: no determined end couple, jealousy
NOTES: first event request done, yay! regular posts will still be uploaded but my main focus will be on event requests! tysm for participating!
reader is g/n, reader is yuu
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˚∘☆∘˚
night raven college was experiencing some of its lowest temperatures all year.
around this time, the weather usually begins to drop from scorching hot summers to calm and crisp autumns. however, this year seemed to differ. harsh winds blew past you and grim as you walked by the great seven, feeling as if they were mocking you for being without a jacket on this fatefully cold day.
“myah.. i don’t like it. feels like they’re makin fun of us.” grim grumbles, burying himself in his paws to maintain some form of warmth. he nestled on your shoulder, leaning against your cheek to also try and keep you warm. “tell me about it..” you sigh, rubbing your shivering arms.
“hey, herbivore,” a familiarly lazy voice rings, poking the back of your head. leona? what in the world is he doing out in the cold? “what’re you doin without a jacket? you goin for a new style or are ya just that scatterbrained?” he teases, flicking your forehead lightly with a raised brow. “ow! im not scatterbrained, i simply forgot.” you grunt in retaliation, holding your forehead to prevent him from flicking you again.
“anyways, what are you doing out here? savanaclaw is warm all year, i expected you to stay there til lunch.” you interrogate him, poking a finger to his chest. that’s when you noticed, he’s covering up for once. more accurately, he’s wearing a coat. unexpected for someone like him to be wearing long sleeves, even in cold weather.
“takin a stroll. got a problem with it?” he shrugs, lying through the skin of his teeth. he actually came to visit you, but by the time he had gotten to ramshackle you were already gone. “no, just doesn’t seem like you.” you grin, chuckling slightly at his silent reaction. leona turned away, eyes averting to the ground.
“tch.” he grunts, following you silently. grim looks to leona, who wasn’t as snarky as he typically was. ruggie could preach for that. leona watches as you shiver, each step you took the only thing keeping you from frostbite. he contemplated on offering his coat, but his pride fails to allow him. he stole glances at you every once in a while, but never spoke.
that was, until you all heard footsteps chasing after you. “[MC]! grim!” you all look up to see jack already a few feet away with his uniform coat in hand. “jack?!” you all collectively shout, not expecting him to see him out here. but then again, he is a jock. a good run perhaps? “housewarden? what are you doing out here?” jack asks, a bit shocked to see his housewarden awake at this hour.
“walkin. gotta problem, frosh?” leona growls, jack immediately holding his tongue for further comments. “no, housewarden. anyway, [MC], take my coat. you’ll freeze out here without one.” jack insists, already draping the coat over you. “ah! jack, it’s freezing out here. keep your coat, are you crazy?” you sigh, trying to take it off and hand it back to him. unfortunately, your strength differs greatly as he manages to keep it on you with ease.
“nothin a run can’t fix.” he laughs, his fangs showing as he smiled. it was quite charming. “awh, that’s so kind of you, jack. thank you.” you smile in return, wrapping yourself in the jacket further. while you and jack bantered back and forth as you walked towards your class. leona on the other hand, was not a fan of this exchange in the slightest. is he getting shown up by his own junior? how unacceptable.
your laughter was like music to his ears.. why’d it have to be for another man? and jack of all people? “jack,” he grunts, suddenly interjecting between you two. “your shiverin. take your coat back.” he scoffs, taking his coat off of your shoulders and tossing it back to him. “..huh?” he raises his brow, barely catching his coat on time. you, grim, and jack all exchanged looks with each other, taken aback by leona’s sudden consideration.
“leona? what are you—” he wraps his coat around you, draping it over your shoulders and buttoning it up with ease. “practically brand new. hardly wore it.” leona huffs, throwing jack a smug look. the wolf beast man took notice of it, shocked at his housewarden’s pettiness. “wow.. thanks leona! that’s sweet of you.” you smile, not finding anything suspicious with his actions.
“whatever, nothin special. just lookin out for my underclassmen.” he grins, ruffling your hair before shooting another smug look at jack. “keep your coat to yourself now, jack. i wouldn’t want ya freezing on me either.” he pats his shoulder before waving and walking off towards the botanical gardens.
“somethin’ seems off with leona today.” grim states bluntly, crossing his arms as he stared at the back of the lion beastman. “..yeah. a little.” jack adds, looking back at those smug glares he received from his own upperclassman. “really? i think he’s being a gentlemen for once.” you chuckle, adjusting the collar. a lion marks their scent as a way of courting their mate, common knowledge for beastmen.
the coat you wore practically reeked of leona definitely worn more than once. that scent was the only thing filling his nostrils, not to mention his enhanced sense of smell. wolves are not all that different, marking their territory and sticking by their mates side til they die. this was no act of kindness.
this was a warning from leona to jack, a simple sign from animal to animal. back off.
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A/N: with the amount of leona requests i got, it’s gonna be like leona’s fighting off the entire school 😭😭🙏🙏
date published: 8/24/24
© temiizpalace — do not copy, steal, or put my work into ai. thank you!
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yourstru1y4ever · 1 month ago
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Day 18 - Hiding an injury
Pairing: Satoru Gojo x F!Reader Word Count: 2.6k Content: Hidden Inventory Arc, canon typical violence (blood, passing out, becoming paralyzed), Gojo is a total asshole through most of this (sorry not sorry), Reader is in her first year at Jujutsu High along with Nanami and Haibara Tuna-Tober 2024 Masterlist <- check out the other fics posted this month!
A/N: So I’m stealing this prompt from the day 15 list because I really liked the idea of hiding an injury and I wanted to play with that here. Anyone who's curious about where in Hidden Inventory this takes place it would be in June 2006! Anywho be sure to like, reblog and comment if you want more! - YoursTruly
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No one is going to help you out.
“Damn it!” You grumble. Of course the mission that the second years are supervising is the one where you, Nanami and Haibara get trapped in an incomplete domain.
The three of you were told that there was a second grade curse who could manipulate other people’s realities. The longer it was alive the stronger it would become. Granted it wasn’t supposed to be your curse to exorcize.
“A measly second grade?” Gojo whined. “Do you want us to immediately wipe it out? Give the case to someone else!” 
Gojo slouched over his desk in annoyance, while Yaga huffs out a sigh.
You and Nanami were sparring out by the track field and Haibara was keeping track of who was winning when you all overheard Gojo from the classroom.
Nanami rolled his eyes and brought his blade up towards you. Shaking your head, you spun the bamboo pole around your hands and pointed it towards him. He swung and you blocked his attack, looking for any opening to strike him.
Yaga glared at him, “Satoru is right, as much as I don’t want to feed his ego.” Geto agreed, “This curse is way too weak for us.”
Gojo brought his gaze to you and Nanami sparring. You were blocking every single hit from Nanami and you were starting to look bored.
“Why don’t we give it to the three of them?” Gojo blurted out.
Yaga followed Gojo’s gaze and took a deep breath in contemplation. “They’re still pretty weak, it’s only been a month since coming to Jujutsu High.” 
“We’ll watch over them.” Geto reasoned, “There’s plenty that they can learn from us out in the field.” 
And now you’re stuck in an incomplete domain because of their lazy asses.
You wanted to stick together as a group but due to the curse’s technique it separated you three from each other.
Maybe if Gojo wasn’t bothering you the entire bullet train ride over, you would’ve been able to sense the curse much better. 
There’s not much you can do about it now, you need to find the entrance. If the curse is strong enough to trap you in this twisted domain, then it’s strong enough to cause you serious damage. 
You can’t retrace your steps, when you look behind there’s just a vast emptiness. Looking ahead isn’t much better; it’s still a vast emptiness but you can see some semblance of walls trying to form around you.
No curses are surrounding you so you just keep walking forward. Staying still will get you killed. It had to be at least an hour since you guys had entered the domain, Geto and Gojo should’ve gotten you guys at this point. What’s taking them so long?
The walls are slowly taking more of a shape and you suddenly stop. Looking down, your feet are stuck in a viscous liquid. You’re unable to move from where you stand and you start to feel a prickling sensation at your feet.
“Damn it!” You yell. You can feel your frustration building up in your body and turning into raw cursed energy. Breathe. Conserve that energy, don’t waste it.
You close your eyes and focus your energy. Try to feel your surroundings, gauge where the curse is located. 
It’s an overwhelming presence, it feels like the curse is all around you. It has to be the domain you’re sensing. Dig deeper.
You can feel your heart beating and the blood flowing through your veins. You try to find any feeling similar to yours. 
A few moments pass by where you’re completely still, seemingly unaware of the presence that was slowly trudging towards you.
A claw swings down towards your face, “f o u n d. y o u.”
You lean back from the claw, eyes still closed but scrunched in a focus. While leaning back you focus your cursed energy to your right fist, a splattering of black and blue covering your arm.
You open your eyes and land the blow on its face. “Divergent Fist!” 
It tanks the hit, and gets pushed back when your cursed energy surges through the punch a few milliseconds after the initial hit.
The curse disperses around the room and the energy output it was spewing out grew stronger. The liquid you are stuck in is slowly creeping its way up your legs, making you more immobile.
You close your eyes again and focus on your breathing. Look defenseless, the curse will come back.
The curse’s overwhelming presence doesn’t bother you anymore. You can feel the blood moving in its body; it’s different from human blood that much you can tell.
Its weak point is now around your legs, the blood coursing through and trying to digest you. Your face twists in concentration and you can vaguely sense everyone else you were with. 
They- they’re outside!
SLASH! You barely dodge the curse’s attack, but your reaction could have been faster. You feel your right shoulder throbbing and a steady flow of blood coming out. You bring your left hand up to start putting pressure on the wound.
You needed to keep your arms up anyways since the goop is now at your hips and slowly climbing higher.
You’re the only one stuck in this incomplete domain. You can outsmart this curse. Desperate times come desperate measures.
You focus your cursed energy to flow through the bottom half of your body and you try your hardest to push your legs through the sludge.
With a lot of force your legs become free, small pin pricks lining your uniform. Run, escape, get outside. You need to see your family again.
With that thought, your legs had a dark blue outline that turned red from raw cursed energy. While Yaga trained you to keep your cursed energy more focused and balanced, you figured he would allow this exception.
As your raw energy flowed you picked up the pace, outrunning the curse. You bring the energy that flowed from your legs into your fists, never losing momentum.
With as much energy you could muster you bring your fist to a half-formed wall, “Black-!” You jump and your fist makes contact-
CRASH! “-FLASH!!” You crash through the domain, shards of the cursed energy shatter around you and you’re falling. Your hand opens up and you roll onto the ground, laying flat on your back with the wind knocked out of you.
Your body aches and you shakily bring a hand up to your right shoulder. You shift, feeling the curse still in the area. Just because you broke out of its incomplete domain, doesn’t mean that you’ve won.
“Damn. . . it. . .” You breathe out. Your legs are immobile at this point, realization sinking in when the curse poisoned you with that goop around your legs.
You can sense the curse still slinking around, waiting to finish you off but you can vaguely feel Haibara and Nanami closing in on your location. You smile and try to lean to your left side.
When you move, the curse picks up its speed to attack. Your smile doesn’t wane, if anything it gets wider.
The curse forms itself into a creature with multiple limbs, its mouth agape, leaking out purple blood. It’s charging at full speed towards you and you bring your hand up trying to give yourself some sort of protection.
You make eye contact with the curse and start laughing, “You’re. . . dead.” you huff out. Two fingers curl into your palm and the hand you had facing the curse becomes a finger gun. 
You pretend to shoot at it and the curse’s limbs fall off.
You become slack-jawed, looking down at your finger gun.
“Did I just do that?” You mutter. You feel a pair of arms wrap around your torso, lifting you up into a sitting position.
“Nah it was Nanami,” Haibara tells you, “Can you stand?”
“No. My legs are paralyzed from the curse’s poison.” You look over and see Nanami focused on the fight in front of him. Haibara walks in front of you, his back to you and kneels down.
He pats his back, “Hop on!” And you sulk while putting your hands on his shoulders 
“This is humiliating,” you say under your breath.
“Huh?” Haibara looks back at you and you hoist yourself onto his back.
“I said you should be helping Nanami.”
Haibara turns his attention back to the fight and gently picks up your legs to wrap around his torso.
He stands, “Nah Kento’s got it, plus Geto and Gojo should be here any second now.”
You scoff, “Uh-huh.”
You hear a squelching sound and the curse is exorcized by Nanami.
You rest your head on Haibara’s shoulder and allow yourself a moment of peace.
“Great work Kento!!” Haibara beams.
Nanami cleans off his blade, and wraps it up, “I wouldn’t have been able to exorcize it without your help.” He gestures towards you.
You weakly smile at him and your eyes flutter close.
“Hey come on stay awake!” Haibara shakes and you groan in frustration.
”I’m fine, I just-“ You freeze and whip your head to your left. Eyes focused on something the other two couldn’t see.
“What is it?”  “How many?” They overlap, you stay quiet and they wait for your response.
Nanami unwrapped his blade again, getting into a fighting position as Haibara took a firmer grip on your legs. His carefree smile turned into a more serious look.
“Two more curses, both are maybe a third or fourth grade.” You tell them and they visibly relax.
“Well if that’s the case-“ Haibara looks at Nanami and the blond rolls his eyes.
“No.”
“What?!“ Haibara pouts, “Come on, you owe me!”
You’re still looking at the oncoming curses, but something feels off. 
“. . .Fine.”
Gojo and Geto were here too, right? So that would mean what you are feeling Geto’s-
“Rock! Paper! Scissors!-”
“DUCK!”  You push down on Haibara’s shoulders and Nanami follows. You all land on the ground right as Geto’s rainbow dragon comes blasting through, destroying all the greenery you were surrounded by. The two boys hop off the dragon's back and Geto sends it away.
Motherfuckers-
“Maaaaaan, you first years got roughed up pretty bad, wouldn’t you say Suguru?”
“The curse should've been an easy task,“ Geto walks up to the pile of you on the ground, you glare at the two boys who are smirking.
Haibara slowly gets up and helps get you on his back again as you stare down the two upperclassmen. 
“The curse was able to create an incomplete domain, we were trapped as soon as we went inside the veil Haibara created.” Nanami informs them.
Geto shares a look with Gojo who still has a carefree smile on his face.
“An incomplete domain?” Geto pushes.
Nanami nods his head, “Yes, we would’ve been dead if she hadn’t broken through the domain.” The upperclassmen still.
Gojo turns and gives his attention to you, “You broke out of its domain? You?”
“I thought you guys had escaped!” You ignore Gojo’s question, “I sensed your cursed energy outside of its domain.”
“Uh, hello?”
“Nah we were stuck fighting these fourth grade curses. They just kept coming and coming; they were never ending!” Haibara complains.
Nanami nods his head once, “At least it gave us good training on target practice.”
“Hello? I asked a quest-!”
You cut him off, sighing, and barely look in his direction, “Yeah I did, so?”
“How?”
“Uhm. . .” You close your eyes and try to remember. Despite being in that fight mere minutes ago you can’t seem to remember, “I’m not sure.”
“HA?!”
Your shoulder throbs and you wince in pain, “You okay?” Geto asks.
“Just. . . fine. . .” You groan. Black spots start to appear in your vision and your grip on Haibara’s shoulders loosen. 
“Hey! Stay awake!!” Is the last thing you remember before passing out.
When you open your eyes, you’re back at Jujutsu High in one of the medical dorms. Your right shoulder is bandaged up and you notice that the cuts on your hands are gone as well as Gojo holding onto your left hand. He’s looking away from you, his head on your lap, fast asleep.
You use your other hand to gently card your fingers through his hair but Geto walks into the room, holding some tea. He gives you a knowing smile as you set your right hand down, a light blush on your cheeks.
“I see you’re awake.”
“How long was I out?” You try to sit up, but the lower half of your body still feels like mush. Gojo groans at you moving, but still stays asleep.
“For a few days at least,” Geto moves to the other side of your bed, “He’s been here since waiting for you to wake up y’know.”
“Oh.” You both glance at Gojo, who’s still resting. 
“We didn’t realize how much blood you were losing,” You turn to look at Geto, who’s avoiding your gaze.
“It’s not anyone’s fault,” You tell him and the corners of his mouth dip down for a moment before he gives you another smile.
“All that matters is that you’re safe.” You nod at that, but can’t help but still feel tension in the air. Sorcerer’s like you are a dime a dozen. They shouldn’t have been this upset at you getting hurt. It’s a small price to pay when dealing with curses.
“I should tell Shoko and the other’s that you’re awake.” Geto starts to leave the room, “They’ll probably ask you questions of things you remember and make sure that your vitals are alright; stuff like that.” He waves his hand as a silent goodbye as he leaves the room.
You lean your head back and look up at the ceiling, trying to make sense of everything. Why did any of them care?
Your legs are still slightly paralyzed from the curse, so you don’t feel Gojo stirring. He slowly blinks awake, eyes widening realizing you're okay. Thank God.
He wants to say something, anything, but when he opens his mouth nothing comes out. He looks down and sees that you’re still holding his hand. He squeezes your hand and smiles. You look back at him and he can see a faint blush on your checks, cute. 
“I’m sorry?” You tilt your head to the side and Gojo gives you a look.
“What?”
“I thought you said-,” You look down at your lap as Gojo lets go of your hand and stands up to stretch. His hand was so warm and without it just feels wrong.
“I didn’t say anything.” He crosses his arms and looks away from you, hoping you wouldn’t notice that the tips of his ears are slightly pink.
“You probably said something stupid,” Shoko tells him as she enters the room. She gives you a smile, “Glad to see you’re awake.”
“Glad to be awake.” You give her a smile back. 
Shoko nods her head and starts her examination while Gojo stays beside you, not saying a word or acknowledging you.
However, Gojo doesn’t actually leave your side until after you go back to your dorm, which took most of the day. He quietly helped you walk back to the dorm, since your legs were still recovering from the poison, and made sure that Haibara or Nanami would bring you something to eat.
But of course Gojo went back to his usual asshole-ish self once you were fully healed and back in class. 
You wondered if that would ever change. . . though you seriously doubted that.
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comingdownwithme · 2 months ago
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CW: Mentions and discussions of intrusive thoughts, details of said intrusive thoughts
also not beta read and it's 6 am at the time of posting so–
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"Tobes," Jeff said as he exhaled smoke, blue eyes averted to the cigarette fixed between his fingers, "D'ya think I'm a, uh, bad person..?"
"Huh?"
Toby blinked and stopped chewing his nail.
"Uhm, wh- what?"
"D'ya think I'm a bad person," Jeff repeats, louder, clearer this time, as he fidgets with his cigarette.
Toby let his words sink in, processing them, before he turned just slightly to watch the other teen from the corner of his eye. Jeff's hand over his shoulder squeezed faintly at the slight movement, an unconscious reaction under Toby's watchful gaze.
"Whu- Why...?" He asked.
"Jus' gimme a yes or no, Tob–"
"No. N- now t- t- tell me why."
Jeff pressed his lips close.
Neither boy said anything for a long moment. There was only the faint cacophony of the street life below them, melding together with the distant chirp of birds that flew over their small, suburban town.
Twenty minutes. That's all they've got left until the bell signaling the end of their lunch period rang. Then it'll be three or so hours until the two would see each other again with Liu in tow for their commute home.
So, as he brought the cigarette to his lips, Jeff decided it'd be best to just rip the bandaid off now than to let it worsen and fester later.
This isn't the first time he's been this vulnerable to Toby anyways, having felt as if he had pulled his ribcage apart to expose his damned soul under his careful eyes, nor did he think this would be the last.
This is just the first time the thought had actually scared him enough to think that maybe– maybe this was the last straw, the line he'd cross that would lead to the loss of his very lifeline.
Jeff inhaled, warmth filled his lungs.
He held that breath.
Then, he exhaled.
And he smelled smoke.
"I..." Jeff glanced up, meeting his best friend's dark eyes, before his gaze flickered down to his feet. "I've been thinkin'..."
"Damn, di- didn't know you–" Toby cracked his neck, "you c- could."
He couldn't help it, and Jeff let slip a snort. "Shuddup,"
Toby rolled his eyes before he elbowed him.
"Yeah, yeah, gettin' on with it," He huffed. "I've just... Sometimes these... thoughts come up."
"Th- thoughts?" Toby raised a brow.
"Bad ones, yeah..." Jeff explained.
Toby hummed, contemplative. "Like...?"
Jeff stared down at his cigarette, watching as smoke slowly rose from the burning end.
"I- I won't make fu- fun of y- y- you, if that's what you're think- thinking."
"Nah," Jeff blew a heavy breath, the scent of nicotine lingering on his tongue. "That's not what I've thought 'bout..."
"What i- is it then?"
"I've thought about hurtin' you."
Jeff let the confession settle between them, and he occupied his free hand by rolling the cigarette between his fingers.
He doesn't meet Toby's eyes when he continues.
"Hurtin' Liu too," He says, "An' mama, daddy... myself...
"I- I uh,"
Jeff's mouth hung open briefly as he tried to organise his thoughts, formulate his words in a way that won't cause his best friend- his only friend- to run off. He knew it was an uphill battle, but before he knew it, words spilled free from his tongue, desperate to pull the suffocating weight of guilt that's been festering, rotting inside him, off of his chest.
"When daddy took me huntin'– you weren't 'round here then, I was eight– I helped him hunt squirrels, had to hold 'em.
"He gave me one, a- an' I held it's limp lil' body in my lil' hands..."
The long, pale fingers that rested over Toby's shoulder flexed involuntary, squeezing the other boy's shoulder.
"I- It was..." Jeff paused, and he pulled in a shuddering breath. "I... I wanted ta crush it's head, hear it's skull crack open in my palms, feel the shards poke outta it's skin, and–"
"B- But did you do it?"
Jeff blinked.
Slowly, he turned to face the shorter teen, and after what felt like an entire lifetime, blue eyes finally met brown.
"Wha–"
"D- did you do it," He asked again, firmer this time.
"Fuck no! I wouldn't–"
"And w- would you hurt m- m- me? How about Liu? Your mo- mom? Dad?"
Jeff pressed his lips into a thin line.
An eye twitched before Toby simply raised a brow in response.
"I..." Jeff sighed. "N... No,"
"Then there's noth- nothing t- t- to worry abou- about."
"Tobes, I just told you I've thought about hurtin' you."
"And I knew you si- since I was– what? T- t- ten?" Toby broke his gaze and huffed out a laugh. "Jeff, you're not gonna hu- hurt me."
Jeff studied his best friend's face with furrowed brows as Toby's words settled between them. Despite the weight of Jeff's confession and the uneasiness even he felt at the mere thought alone, as the gentle brush of an afternoon wind ruffled brunette locks over his freckled cheeks, Toby met Jeff's gaze from the corner of his eyes and smiled.
"You're..." Jeff's mouth hung open briefly, eyes flickering to the floor. "Toby, you're so fuckin' weird."
"Yeah, yeah, sh- shut up, you've alr– already t- t- told me before." He huffed, leaning back against Jeff's arms over his shoulder, "Now q- quit the sad sh- shit. You're not a– a bad per- person, alright?"
"I'm..." Jeff sucked in a shuddering breath and held it. "I'm not... a bad person."
"See?" Toby's smile split into a full grin this time, revealing bucked teeth. "N- Now c'mon, I've guh- gotta keep telling you about how much o- of a piece of- piece of shit R- Richardson was e- earlier."
Jeff rolled his eyes, and as his own lips curved upwards into a small, unconscious smile, he held the shorter teen just a bit closer to his side, his cigarette forgotten between his own two fingers.
"Alright, what'd he do now?"
It was as if nothing happened. Toby still talked as if Jeff hadn't just admitted to thinking about hurting him. Hell, he shut it down quick and made him admit- accept that maybe, just maybe, he wasn't as bad of a person as he had first thought.
He knew, somewhere in the back of his mind, that Toby's words were only a bandage over an infected wound, that those thoughts aren't going to come up any less or get any better, any less disturbing. But with how he had talked- how he had believed in what he said so easily and with such nonchalance, even Jeff was swayed, willing to forgive even himself for even daring to think about hurting someone good, hurting someone like Toby.
It was just the two of them on that roof that one, cool afternoon, chattering away as the sounds of the surrounding town blurred around them. Jeff had never felt this light, not for as long as he could remember, and as he revelled in the easy flow of their conversation, unburdened by the guilt that would usually taint these small moments, he wanted to hold this one close.
A time where he bore his damned and accursed soul, and how a weird, freckled teen accepted him, all of him.
It was just the two of them on that roof.
Jeff, Toby,
And smoke.
He could still smell it.
It wrapped around his throat, clogging his lungs.
Jeff watched the burning visage of his own home, transfixed from it's front walkway. It illuminated the surrounding streets in a warm glow amidst the dark backdrop of night, and his skin burned with an unrepentant itch, nerves still alight as raw muscle and reddened skin were exposed to the cool evening air.
Whatever dragged itself out of the Woods' home- out of hell, wasn't Jeffery Woods. No, he wouldn't consider himself that, not anymore.
Whatever was left of that troubled teen died in the fires of that house alongside his parents, leaving the charred, burned remains of a deep, primal anger in disfigured, human flesh to watch as the place he once called home steadily burned in it's funeral pyre.
He knew who did this.
And as he pulled himself up, the small movement forcing a sharp gasp from his damaged throat, Jeff knew now for a fact that he wasn't a good person as he moved down the street towards three, distinct houses, fueled by an adrenaline and an anger that burned brighter than the flames he's limping away from.
May God save his soul.
And may his best friend- wherever he is- forgive him for what he's about to do
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h4ndwr1tten · 1 year ago
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𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭?
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characters — nanami kento x reader
note — i'm so sorry this came out so late. if you didn't see my other posts, i mentioned that i basically rewrote this bc the original was so bad, and then i went on vacation. it's still kinda bad i'm sorry. dividers by benkeibear.
cw — not proofread (is anything i write even proofread?), established relationship, kinda ooc nanami, pregnancy, few mentions of sex, mentions of birth control, mentions of pregnancy symptoms, a lot of crying, sappy shit, angst, hurt/comfort. lmk if i missed any!
synopsis — after a hellish week caused by a misunderstanding and sickening fear, you decide you'd had enough of not speaking to your boyfriend and reveal your secret.
part 1 | part 2
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for the past week, you've noticed that nanami had been taking on longer shifts than normal. in fact, it wasn't normal, because if there was one thing he absolutely hated in this world, it was working overtime. he'd leave for the school early, sometimes before you'd wake up, and come home past dinner or when you were already in bed. what was even more surprising (and hurtful) to you was that he was taking more time out of his day to put up with gojo satoru and his antics, rather than be around you.
you knew he was avoiding you. it was quite obvious, and nanami made no effort to hide it either. during the now short amounts of time he was home, he barely spoke and looked at you. this must have been what it felt like to him on that night, you realized.
you also knew that nanami would come around and talk to you. or, at least, you hoped he would. you knew him like no other—your boyfriend was a rational man who always thought things carefully and through. you convinced yourself that he was still upset and in need of space to think about that night, and maybe even what you were up to during that. maybe he was thinking of the possibility of you seeing someone else, having feelings for someone who wasn't him. by letting him ignoring you, you believed you were giving him the time and space he needed.
throughout the week, your pregnancy symptoms had become more prominent. you also found out that your birth control expired, which explained why you had gotten pregnant. you felt stupid for not checking the date. you began experiencing morning sickness, strange cravings, fatigue, even mood swings. but nanami wasn't there to see it happen. he'd already be at the school when you would be hunched over the toilet. he'd be on his lunch break while you'd be eating ice cream topped with pickles. you would be asleep half the time he was gone, which would help prevent the overthinking you faced while you were awake. you would be elated to hear him come home, but then tear up right after when you realized it would be another night without hearing his voice, without feeling his arms around you.
everyday you thought of revealing to him that you were pregnant with his child. and everyday, you thought of how he might be enraged and leave you for good. but despite the stomach churning fear you had, you were desperate to hear him speak to you. desperate to be held and kissed by him, to be looked at as if you were the most ethereal being in the world. you were desperate to hear nanami tell you he loves you, and always will.
after long thought and contemplation, debating with yourself about whether to confess or not, you came to a conclusion. you had had enough of this distance between you and the man you loved. tonight, when he came home, you were going to tell him the truth.
you were exhausted. you felt like if you blinked once, your eyes wouldn't open for another 9 hours. but you had to stay up. you were waiting on nanami to walk through the door.
and luckily for you, he did. you heard the faint click of the lock followed by soft footsteps padding into the kitchen, where you were waiting with a plate of food for him.
nanami took one brief glance at you before looking back down, not bothering to greet you. you inhaled deeply, weakly fighting back tears.
"hi, ken," you started nervously. he didn't reply, but he began to occupy himself with the mail you left out on the counter, telling you that he was listening.
"i made you food," you continued, "but it might be a little cold. i made it earlier but you didn't—"
"i already ate, thank you," nanami cut you off, not meeting your eyes.
"oh."
your heart began to beat erratically, and tears began to flood your eyes. you kept thinking to yourself that he's upset, and for all he knows you might be cheating on him. you reminded yourself why you were doing this, and that you had to push through if you wanted this misunderstanding to end.
"how was your day?" you asked shakily, opening your eyes despite the tears that were still there.
your heart sunk lower when you saw that he was making his way to the bedroom, and you swore it cracked when you hear the barely there "good" and a door shutting.
with your elbows propped on the counter and keeping your trembling frame up, you buried your face in your hands. this went much smoother in your head. you imagined nanami to have accepted the dinner you made him, take a bite of it at the least, and let you talk to him. but he was refusing to let down this cold front he kept up around you. you were beginning to have second thoughts about telling him.
but you couldn't keep hiding it, you knew that. so, wiping away any stray tears and taking a few deep breaths in, you made your way to the bedroom.
you found nanami on the bed, already dressed in his pajamas and hair free of any product. his glasses were set neatly on the nightstand and his phone was in his hand. nanami wasn't the kind of person to be addicted to his phone, and even though you've been going through it for a while now, him not paying you any mind and more attention to his phone was painful.
"ken," you muttered, trying to keep your voice steady.
without craning his neck, nanami looked up at you with his eyebrow raised. he seemed tired, exasperated, and looked as though he didn't want to talk but just wanted to get it over with.
"can we talk? please?" your voice was thick with emotion, the please coming out softer and cracking.
nanami sighed before tossing his phone onto the bed. he finally, for the first time in days, looked at you and held your gaze expectantly.
"go on."
letting out a breath you didn't know you held in, you began slowly, "i am so... so, so sorry, kento. i know i hurt you and i made you believe that i would see someone else. and i'm not, i promise you. i could never love anyone else the way i love you."
nanami's eyes softened, and you could practically feel the worries of you cheating dissipate from him.
"so what was with you night?" nanami asked, the most he's ever said to you so far.
you almost choked on a sob when you realized what you had to do next.
"o-okay, uh... while you were at work, i found something out," you basically whispered. there was no need for extra details. you were getting straight to the point.
slowly, you turned to the dresser behind you and reached for your purse. your hands shook violently as you dug inside for the piece of plastic that made your life a living hell this past week. as you clutched it tightly in your hand, knuckles whitening, you closed your eyes and tilted your head up. you couldn't control the tears any longer, and the sobs were growing harder to keep down.
"love?"
the name caused a whimper to escape you. you inhaled shakily, trying to reduce your crying before turning around with the test results hidden behind your palm. as you walked towards nanami, you felt as though this was the last time you would ever see him, speak to him, and be around him.
with a quivering hand, you hand him the test.
"i'm so, so sorry," you whisper.
nanami flipped the test over, his eyes scanning every inch of the device. it took him a few seconds to realize what it was, and by the way his eyes widened and expression contorted into one of shock, you knew he had seen the results.
and when he didn't say anything, you swore your heart had actually broken.
"i'm sorry," you repeated through a heavy sob, no longer able to keep in your cries.
you turned around, back faced to nanami as you continued to cry into your hands. the lack of response was a response in itself, you believed. you knew it was over. you knew you were going to have to pack all your things, find somewhere else to stay, and raise this child alone.
that is, until you felt a gentle hand on your waist and a quiet voice behind you say, "y/n, look at me. please."
so you did, hesitantly. you turned back around and peeled your hands away from your tear stained face, but avoided eye contact, or even looking at his face. keeping your head down, you were afraid of what you would see, or of what you would read.
then both hands came to your cheeks, cupping them carefully and tilting your head up. your eyes met his, and instead of finding the anger you were expecting, you found comfort and understanding.
"is it mine?" he asked first, likely to confirm that you hadn't been with anyone else.
"yes," you replied without hesitating. "kento, it's only ever buh—been you."
he nodded, believing you completely. he began wiping away your tears with the pads of his thumbs, even though more would fall every time he wiped at them.
"y/n, why didn't you tell me sooner?" nanami whispered. he wasn't angry with you, however. just a bit hurt and curious.
"because, kento!" your voice coming out steadier than expected. "you have your whole life planned out. you have goals and dreams and you know what you want in life. i couldn't, i can't ruin that for you."
"and i was scared, ken. i was scared that you'd get mad and leave me and that you wouldn't want anything to do with our kid. and—and maybe i'm selfish for not telling you, maybe i'm selfish for hiding something so important, so life changing, and maybe that makes me a bad girlfriend. but i couldn't let you go like that. i love you too much to do that."
nanami now had watery eyes at your confession. despite still feeling a bit upset at the fact that you had kept this from him, he fully understood and didn't hold it against you. and despite already knowing, he even felt elated to hear that you loved him so dearly.
"y/n," he sighed, "i would never, ever get mad at you for this."
you froze, sniffling and looking up at him. the curiosity in your eyes urging him to go on.
"you becoming pregnant wasn't—isn't on you. this was mostly caused by me," nanami said, hoping it would ease and erase the feeling of everything being your fault.
"but i was stupid and didn't realize my birth control was expired," you replied.
"even if, y/n. we both did this, we both had sex, we are both in this together. this is our child."
"i know that, ken," you sighed, hiccuping shortly after.
"then you do know that since this is a result of both our actions, i will be there for you, for us? there is no way in hell i would leave you for getting pregnant, i'm the one who got you pregnant in the first place. yes, this is life changing. yes, i have goals, i have plans for the future—for our future. because every time i think about it, you are there. it doesn't matter if our timing isn't right, it doesn't matter if we aren't married yet. i am extremely confident that one day, i'll put a ring on your finger and we will spend eternities together, with this child. do you understand, y/n, love?"
his ramble was so sweet and so genuine, just as all his other rambles were. no matter the situation, whether you'd be feeling insecure or you both got into an argument, nanami never failed to reassure you and make you feel better. they were waves of relief and comfort, like sudden shelter from pouring rain. like being bundled up in blankets and full of warmth after shivering for so long. like a breath of fresh, cool air after a steamy shower.
like nanami telling you that everything was alright, and no matter how tough the situation felt, he would stand by you.
"yes," you breathed, "i understand."
"good," nanami whispered back.
still holding your face in his hands, he pulled you towards him and planted a lingering kiss on your forehead, and then a peck before removing one hand from your face and down to your hip. nanami squeezed you gently and walked you both to the bed, sitting on the edge and pulling you into his lap. he slid his arm around your middle, then moved the hand still on your face to the back of your head and gently guided you to the crook of his neck. you wrapped your own arms over his shoulders and squeezed him tight, the way he was doing you. you continued to pour out whatever remaining feelings of sadness and relief, quietly sniffling and whimpering into his neck, all the while nanami would softly rub up and down your back, occasionally patting, combing his fingers through your hair and scalp, and whispering sweet nothings and reassuring affirmations into your ear. leaving sweet kisses around your face, into your hair, on your shoulder.
when your cries died down and all that was left were hiccups, you quietly muttered, "i'm sorry for doubting you and thinking you'd leave."
"shh, don't apologize," nanami assured you. "i understand. i'm sorry i thought you were seeing someone else, and i am truly sorry for giving you the cold shoulder and not talking things out with you like an adult. i was hurt and afraid to face the truth, but i realize i was wrong. do you forgive me?"
pulling away from his neck, you looked into his sincere amber eyes, cupping his cheeks. nodding, you answered, "of course."
a small smile graced his lips, followed by a gentle kiss on yours. pulling away, you tilted your head down and rested your forehead on his. both of your eyes shut, your arms squeezing each other in silent reassurance.
"i love you, y/n, and our baby, and this future we're creating together."
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ma1dita · 10 months ago
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Duddee, now you gotta write luke proposing to trouble, you simply cannot now IBHBHKK
the perfect weekend
a ‘partners in crime’ alternate universe installment - luke castellan x dionysus!reader
alternate universe masterpost
words: 1.2k (this was too cute the word count escaped me)
summary: alternate universe - the perfect weekend with your perfect boy, even if he thinks otherwise
a/n: happy luke happy luke happy luke FIANCE LUKE 
(posted 2/4/23 unbetad and written on caffeine)
This weekend felt like a dream.
Luke took you to your favorite spots that you’ve both carved memories out of in Westport, buying you and his mom gorgeous fresh flowers from the farmers’ market, and he let you drag him around his hometown, spending hours in tiny antique shops and the record store on Main Street. He couldn’t get over how you always found fun in the simple things— even going to the pharmacy to pick up his mom’s medication felt like going to Disney World with you. He couldn’t be more sure of his decision, it was almost inconceivable to spend another day without you being his fiancee.
But luck wasn’t known to be on his side, after all (yeah, thanks dad). Luke’s always had to work harder to get what he wants, and he’s spent the past few years trying to prove himself to your dad—though deep down, he thinks Mr. D doesn’t mind him as much as he makes it seem. (Asking him for his blessing last week over a bottle of wine and a bone-shaking hug scared the wits out of him. He pretended to not notice the god cry.)
Luke just wants to give you what you deserve. And if he needs to spend the rest of his life working on it to prove it, he ought to do it with you by his side.
But he couldn’t think of how.
He tried proposing over dinner last night, with the smell of burnt cookies in the air, but that wasn’t romantic at all, and his hands were shaking so hard he knocked a glass over, prompting you and his mom to fuss over the mess and giggle over his silliness. You both chatted deep into the night, Luke sitting quietly and nodding at two of his favorite women babbling about who knows what (Sometimes he’s still convinced you like his mom more than him, but the way you both take care of him makes him tear up if he thinks too hard about it).
When you went horseriding this afternoon, he set up a picnic for lunch, which was romantic. Chocolate-covered strawberries and sandwiches made by mom, sparkling cider twinkling in the sun. Luke was sure it was going to be great timing— until he realized the ring box fell out of his pocket again, and he slipped in manure trying to rush you back to the house (The sound of your laughter at clumsiness made his heart warm though, and it almost made up for the three hours he looked for the stupid box in the grass that night when you fell asleep with his tiny Star Wars-themed flashlight).
He woke you up early before the sun rose, carrying you out to the car still bundled up in his old Toy Story throw blanket that you wouldn’t let him toss out when he brought it to college (The faded pictures of Buzz and Woody kept a smile on your face, and the memories it brought make you feel connected to 9-year-old Luke). The drive to the beach was short, a sleepy smile on your face as you felt Luke grab onto your hand, sand getting between your toes before he laid out a blanket and the both of you sat down.
Cracking open a redbull for the both of you to sip on, you leaned against his muscled frame, legs hanging over his lap as he wiped the sand off your feet, holding you close as he smiled.
“Good morning, handsome,” you grinned, leaning up for a kiss. Luke obliged, savoring the taste of you mixed with sleep and artificial peach. Your noses nudge against each other before he mumbles a reply, “Good morning, pretty girl.”
“Y’know? I could die happy just like this. I can’t think of anything else that would make this weekend more perfect.”
Luke hummed in contemplation, “I could think of a few things,” he said, as a laugh bubbled from his lips. A noise of confusion rose from you as you reached up to dust lint off his shirt before your knee nudged something hard in his pocket, and your eyebrow raised in mischief.
“Dirty boy, you get me out of your mom’s house and you’re already excited?”
And he laughed the stress off until it freed itself from his bones, pure elation radiating off of him before Eos even had a chance to spread her first rays of light into the sky. 
He’s never needed perfect.
He just needs you.
His hands dug into his pocket, pulling out the ring box that’s caused him so much trouble this weekend. But a life with you should’ve already prepared him for that—and the shock on your face became funnier when you launched yourself on top of him, kicking up sand and taking the air out of his lungs.
You both hit the ground with a loud thud, your nose buried in his chest as he chuckles at your scream. Why was he even worried to begin with? 
“Wait, wait, I still have something to say trouble, don’t jump ahead of the script!”
His hand rubbed your back in gentle strokes as he popped the box open to reveal a delicate golden band with two diamonds juxtaposed against each other sitting pretty on top.
“It’s always been you and me. And I’ve spent hours thinking of what to say, days trying to figure out when the time would be right, months working for a pretty ring that’s perfect for you, years loving you… and well… I want more. I want this, you and me spending the rest of our lives together because I can’t comprehend a future without you. I’d do anything for you trouble, and I don’t believe in much, but I believe in you. Us.”
You’ve cried so hard by this point that you’re convinced it’s so goddamn ugly but Luke smiles at you like he’s been promised immortality. And perhaps he has, with the future you two will have scrolling through his mind like an old film, a house on a hill, kids, a dog, shit—whatever you want as long as he’s with you it’ll be the closest thing to forever he’d have.
“Are you sure?” you said sniffling, and your boyfriend wiped your tears away like he has countless times before, though happy tears are something he’ll have to get used to.
“I literally ruined your proposal, I just thought you were horny, oh my gods…” Whining loudly and laughing, you held your shaking hand out as he sat up to put the ring on your finger.
“Well, we can fix that later. I still have a question to ask, after all.”
Luke grinned when your head nodded rapidly, finally shutting up so you wouldn’t interrupt him again.
“Will you,” he says so surely now, saying your name before continuing, “let me have the honor of spending the rest of our lives together as your husband?”
“Gods, yes. Fucking hell angelface, did you really think I’d say no?”
The both of you laughed through tears and snot as he placed the ring on your left hand, and still, it couldn’t be more perfect.
“A life with trouble is the life for me,” he mused, laughing as you covered his face in kisses before the both of you fell back into the sand a tangle of lips and lust and love.
You jolted up from your fiance’s embrace just as he thought he was going to get lucky, almost emptying your entire wallet of drachmas into the sand-covered blanket to Iris message your friends.
---
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(pics are not representative of reader's appearance or gender just a lil visual for funsies)
ask to be added to general/luke taglists!
luke taglist (struck out won't let me tag, turn on my post notifs?): @kissingyourgrl @dorcas4meadowes @lorarri @andrewgarfldsgf @noodlesketchbook @10ava01 @poppysrin @ashisabitgay @timhalamet @liv1104 @leeknows-wife @mxtokko @bugcuti3 @luvvfromme @midmourn @2hiigh2cry @yuminako @niktwazny303 @lukecastellandefender @intergalactic-padawan @iliketopgun @annybah @dangelnleif @thegrinningghost @alyssajunelle @obxstiles @m00ng4z3r @visndcaitswhore @b0ok-lover @elegant-face-tree @this-barbie-is-having-breakdowns @amortencjja @idonevenknow1359 @maliaaaa @targaryenluvs @sakyira @dhdjdjjdhsjdiri @number-onekidqueen @nininehaaa @bradynoonswife @stevenknightmarc @hoodedhavok @happy-mushrooms @homebyeleven @anotherblackreader @too-deviant @liviessun
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yeostars · 10 months ago
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౨ৎ♡ | Heartstrings and tears |
• J. YH .ᐟ •
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•pairing- bf .ᐟ jeong yunho x reader .ᐟ
•synopsis- wherein yunho and y/n have an argument late at night, y/n leaves their apartment for some space while walking to clear out her thoughts without informing yunho. both of them are mad at each other, but are worried about the latter at the same time. Cold shoulders. Him kissing away your tears. (a happy ending at the end dw)
•genre- angst, fluff at the end
•warnings- just some high tension and aggression throughout the story. tears and sarcasm, arguments, typical argument and resolving conflicts
•author's note- randomly thought of this fic idea in the morning, and i had it all planned out so i decided to write it in the eve itself. I still have my ongoing hwa and yeo fic left to complete, I'll post them soon after this i swear ! this is my first written imagine on a specific member, hope you enjoy reading !
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In the dimly lit apartment, tension hung in the air like an invaded storm. You sat on the extreme far end of the sofa, wanting to be as distant from your boyfriend, as you could, at the moment. Arguments barely took place between you and Yunho in the course of your relationship. Then what had led you to have one, at this moment, which left both of you frustrated along with your anguished emotions bubbling up to the surface?
Well, this argument was a result of your small pent up issues and minor conflicts. Both of you bottled up such opinions and worries you had for yourselves and for each other, and finally, a fully blown argument involving sharp and harsh words towards each other took place. Not to mention the fact that both you and Yunho were stubborn and childish, hence sarcastic remarks throughout the argument was a must.
Yunho's lips released a profound sigh, and you could practically feel his frustration and anger from that sigh. He got up, gave you one last glance and retreated to the bedroom. You didn't even glance at him all this time while he left. All you did was stare at the floor, as the echo of the closing door of his room resonated in your ears.
You lolled your head back on the sofa and stared up at the ceiling. No. Just no. You couldn't bear this atmosphere with unresolved tension anymore. You needed some space, too. Perhaps, the idea of a night walk didn't seem so bad to you. You needed this to clear out your thoughts or else you couldn't face Yunho. Not at the moment, atleast.
You stood up and lingered across the door of his room, and after giving the closed door one last glance, you picked up your phone & the spare keys of your apartment, put on your slippers and headed out of the apartment, closing the door very softly.
After what seemed like half an hour, Yunho finally got out of the bedroom and walked towards the deserted living room, as if ready to face you & resolve the argument once and for all. As he scanned the empty and silent living room, worry etched across his forehead lines as his brows furrowed. He hurriedly went to the kitchen and your room, the bathroom and possibly checked every corner of your house to find you. No trace of you. You were nowhere to be found...
Is she insane? Yunho mumbled, as his eyes lingered across the big circle clock in the living room, reading the time. 11.45. Where the hell did she go this late at night? Without even informing or texting me.... he thought, as he immediately went to the bedroom to reach out for his phone & came back to the living room to sit on the sofa again, his phone in the palm of his hands, his fingers lingering on your number in the messaging app.
He contemplated for a while, what kind of text he should send you, or weather he should text you at all. He understood that you probably went out to get some space & to let everything sink in, but without even informing him...? Didn't you know that the person he worried and cared for the most was you..?
He realized that you were giving him the silent treatment. A cold shoulder, perhaps, and he decided to reciprocate this silent treatment of yours. Yunho sat there, with a blank expression on his face, scrolling through all sorts of comedy videos on social media but none of them even made him smile an inch, let alone laugh. His thoughts were consumed by your whereabouts and your argument that took place earlier.
Minutes passed, as the feelings of worry, guilt, frustration, anger and desperation consumed him. He finally decided to push his ego aside and text you because hell, he couldn't bear this anymore. He wanted to resolve all of this. He longed to see your smile, longed to cuddle and kiss you, longed to just be with you and end this damn argument.
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Yunho impatiently waited for you to come back home, his feet tapping the floor every second. He recollected himself and thought of how he'd face you and what he would say when he faced you. Well, half of it depended on how you were. Were you mad? Were you still upset? All these thoughts were held at a standstill as he heard the loud doorbell of your apartment.
He stood up in a jiffy, opening the door to reveal you, safe and sound, in front of him. Your palms reached at the back of your neck, clearly a little embarrassed as Yunho stepped aside to let you in. You still stared only at the floor and nowhere else. The farthest you could glance at was Yunho's black sweatshirt. You just couldn't meet his eyes, and your boyfriend stared at you with such intensity & the cold expression on his face was something you wouldn't want to see.
"You're unbelievable, you know that? Informing me that you were going out or even texting me wouldn't hurt, Y/N. Especially after our heated argument, what emotions did u expect me to have after you left home without a single word? Do you know how worried i was?!" He said this, in a tone higher than usual. He almost regretted it after a second and thought he should've apologised to you first..
You had to admit, though, it wasn't the best decision to leave home without informing or texting him, so it was right for him to get mad over that. But, you had a right to be mad, too, he said quite a few sharp words during your argument earlier that stung you right in the heart.
"I'm... I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that. Don't you think you have something to apologize for, too, Yunho?" You said, stuttering a little.
"I know i do. Would you atleast look at me, though? You've been staring at the floor ever since. Look me right in the eye, please." He pleaded, coming a step closer to you.
Your heart immediately picked up its pace as you stared at your boyfriend in front of you, his expression filled with regret and guilt.
"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, Y/N. For everything earlier. For those harsh words and that... attitude. But you have to know that you're just as stubborn as me. To be honest, i realized that whatever we were arguing about earlier was childish and wasn't worth for us being mad at each other. Forgive me please. I can't bear all this tension and just want to see you smile." He said all that at one go, as if he already had figured out what he'd say to you once you're back home.
You bit your lips as you stared at him, his words and his apology ringing in your ears like an echo. Before you even knew it, tears starting streaming down your face, as you took everything in. Yunho's gaze towards you softened, and nothing hurt him more than seeing you cry. You rarely ever cried in front of him and the fact that you were, right now, almost made him want to cry too.
He immediately came closer towards you, his left hand sliding behind your waist and right hand behind your head, pulling you closer to his chest. "You know, seeing you cry hurts me a lot. I feel like crying too now.." he said, softly patting your head as you calmed down. As you cried for a minute or two in his arms, you pulled back, still in his embrace, to look at him. "I'm sorry, too. I hate arguing with you. Especially since you're the sweetest and kindest person i've ever seen in my life. Instead of being angry at you, i was angrier at myself. You never say such harsh words, so i felt like i must've done or said something really bad to have you react like that." You said, your voice breaking a little, a few tears streaming down your face.
"Don't say stuff like that, y/n. I'm the guilty one here, too. Don't blame yourself only because as a matter of fact, we were both childish and egoistic" He said, and suddenly you felt the palm of his hand at your head slide down lower to the back of your neck, pulling you closer to him, as his lips glided effortlessly to the tears on your cheeks.
Did he...just kiss my tears away?!? You wondered as he finally rested his forehead against yours, waiting for you to say something.
Instead of replying to him, you were the one who pulled him closer by the neck now, your lips instantly connecting with his. Yunho's eyes widened in surprise, yet he picked up the pace of the kiss in a second and kissed you back just as passionately as you did. Both his arms were resting against your waist now, as the both of you just kissed and felt each others love in silence.
As you pulled back, panting, in the dire need of some air, a blush immediately formed on your cheeks. Yunho noticed that and smirked, ruffling your hair in endearment.
"Hey, you're the one who started the kiss & you're being shy now..?" He questioned, chuckling.
"S-so what? You're way too good of a kisser & that's the most normal reaction i could ever have." You said, all flustered.
"I'm way too good of a kisser, hm? Well then, would you mind doing something more than just kissing..?" He asked, smirking yet again.
"Tonight...? No way, Yunho. You know that we've both got work tomorrow. Probably tomorrow night since its the weekend later, if you're good enough to me." You say, joking.
"Good enough?! Aren't i always good enough to you, darling?" He said, purposely adding darling at the end to make you even more flustered than you already are.
"W-whatever. Anyways, lets go sleep now, its past one o'clock for gods sake." You said, reaching out for his hand, as the both of you walked towards the bedroom, reaching out towards your respective wardrobes to change into your nightclothes.
"I love you." You mumble to Yunho besides you, just as you're about to sleep.
"I love you too, Y/N. More than you'll ever know. Lets never argue again, all it does is waste our time." Yunho said, turning off the lights as you nodded, the both of you having a sound and relaxed sleep because of your resolved argument.
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sissyisawitch · 11 months ago
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I'll Be Home For Christmas
Relationship: Sebastian Sallow x f!MC
Summary: After leaving everything behind and starting a new life almost three years ago, MC returns to Hogsmeade for Christmas Eve. Little does she know that her brief return will be enough for her past to catch up with her…
Word Count: ~9.4k
Warnings: Mentions of alcohol in the beginning? Otherwise it's just pure pining and fluff
Author's Note: Special one shot because I just love Christmas. It should've been even longer, but I had to shorten it, or I'd never have managed to post it in time for Christmas. Anyway, I had a blast writing it, and I hope you'll enjoy it as much as I did!
I wish you all a wonderful Christmas!🎅�� Lots of love💕
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“Oh, MC, I can’t get over how much we’ve missed of each other’s life. You can’t imagine how much I’ve missed you!”
MC and Poppy sat in a cozy corner of the Three Broomsticks, whose dim lighting and soft hum of conversation provided a comfortable backdrop for their reunion. Excitement and laughter had been echoing for the past hours, as the two best friends shared their numerous respective adventures, and reminisced about the wonderful times they shared while at Hogwarts.
“Life sadly took us on separate journeys after graduation, there was no other way… But I'm so grateful that we haven't lost touch.” MC said as she took a sip of her third Butterbeer of the afternoon. She had never realised how much she had missed the sugary drink, especially after being away from Hogsmeade for so long. It tasted of the good old days when she spent the entire day shopping with her schoolmates, before going for a collation to relax and forget about the homework they had to do.
After Hogwarts, Poppy became a renowned Magizoologist, following in her grandmother's footsteps, like she had always dreamt of doing. As for MC, she had taken a very different path. Barely a few weeks after graduating, the girl had decided to leave everything behind and embark on a life full of travel and adventure. She never stayed in one location for very long. Her aim was to discover as many places as she could.
Now, the only thing left of her former life was her best friend Poppy, and the letters they regularly exchanged. It was for her that MC had exceptionally returned to Hogsmeade, to see her on this Christmas Eve.
“Merlin… I didn’t realise it was so late already.” MC sighed as she looked out the window. The evening sun painted the sky in hues of orange and pink, casting a warm glow through the pub windows.
Poppy grimaced in response, as if a bittersweet realisation came to her, “Time flies when you’re having fun. I wish I could stay longer... but Gran hasn't been well lately, and I've already left her on her own all afternoon...”
“Don't worry, Poppy. I totally understand.”
“I'd love to offer you a place to stay, especially since it’s Christmas Eve… but as I said, it's complicated at the moment.”
MC offered the girl another genuine and reassuring smile, “It’s okay, I don't mind. I've managed to find a room in an inn for a couple of days.”
“I'm glad to hear that.” Poppy smiled back, although ruefully.
After paying for their drinks, the two girls made their way out. They stood on the porch on the Three Broomstick in contemplative silence, the air thick with unspoken emotions. The time had come to bid farewell once again.
Poppy took a deep breath, as if to get rid of the lump in her throat, before breaking the silence, "MC, it's been wonderful catching up with you. I wish we could freeze time and stay like this forever."
A wistful smile played on MC's lips. "Life moves on, though. We have our own journeys to continue."
Poppy hesitated before uttering her newt words, “…Don't let it be another three years before our next reunion."
“It won’t. I promise.” MC replied weakly, having to bite the inside of her cheek to hold back her tears. She had never been very good at goodbyes.
Maybe that was why she had never said one to Sebastian.
With a lingering hug, they exchanged a few more words, promises to stay in touch, and expressions of hope for the future. It was nightfall when Poppy finally disapparated, leaving MC alone on the village streets, which were neither crowded nor deserted. Most of the people still outside were on their way home, or off to enjoy a late drink with their friends.
MC walked for a while, before stopping at a vantage point overlooking the quaint village which was bathed in the soft glow of Christmas lights that shimmered like a galaxy full of stars. Tremendous decorated Christmas trees could be found on every street corner, perfectly matching the garlands of fir branches that linked the roofs of the various cottages. It was even possible to find some snowmen that were bewitched to fill the air with the enchanting melodies of Christmas carols. The whole scene resembled a holiday postcard brought to life, especially with the thick blanket of snow covering the village.
It was magical. Literally.
As MC gazed at the picturesque view, memories started flooding her mind. The charming village setting reminded her of the spirited Christmases she used to share with Sebastian, spending the best part of their day at Zonko's trying to find a way to prank Ominis, before heading off to Honeydukes to buy Chocolate Frogs, just in case the blond ended up sulking for too long. The inseparable duo then made it back to the Great Hall just in time for the big Christmas feast, where they joined Ominis. The smell of roasted turkey, and the sound of familiar laughter echoed in MC’s thoughts.
After dinner, the group of friends used to return to their common room and sit down by the fire. She could almost hear the crackling of the fireplace, and feel the camaraderie that accompanied their joyful exchange of gifts. After that, Ominis fell asleep very quickly, and MC and Sebastian usually took the opportunity to get a little closer. If she closed her eyes, she could feel the sensation of his shoulder used as a pillow against her cheek, while his woody cologne invaded her nostrils.
MC could never escape these kinds of memories, especially when she was in Hogsmeade.
Everything always led back to Sebastian in Hogsmeade.
That was why she had refused to set foot there for so long.
To forget the insurmountable heartbreak of never having her feelings returned by the love of her life, MC had decided to start a new life. She had wanted to move on, to forget her feelings for Sebastian, but she had known that this would prove to be impossible with him in her life. She had therefore decided to make a clean break – because she knew that bidding Sebastian farewell was not a skill she possessed – and to disappear brutally. To make her plan even more effective, she had also cut ties with Ominis, seeing as he was Sebastian’s best friend, and MC had felt awkward to put him in the middle of her drama. The only thing MC had kept from her old life was Poppy... now her one and only friend.
MC had then spent years travelling around the world, searching for a place where she would feel comfortable enough, and that she would love enough to want to settle there for the rest of her life. The goal to her quest was to find a place that felt like home.
After almost three years, she still had not found her home.
“Ow!” MC suddenly exclaimed. Someone forcefully colliding against her back disrupted her reverie.
“I’m so sorry, ma’am. I didn’t see you.”
MC turned at the sound of a deep masculine voice. Indeed, the man could not possibly have seen her, for he was carrying a large pile of children's toys in his arms, up to his eye level, thus blocking his field of vision.
The man shifted the pile of toys into one of his arms instead of both, moving them away from his face to take a look at the unlucky person he had just unintentionally bumped into.
Next thing MC knew, before she could even realise it, MC found herself face to face with none other than Sebastian.
His chocolate eyes widened in recognition as they locked onto hers. An amalgam of shock and bewilderment flashing across his face, washing away his previous apologetic look. He was so flabbergasted that he forgot about the packages in his hands, which began to wobble. MC rushed closer to him, to put the parcels back upright, and prevent them from shattering on the floor.
“…MC?” He asked hesitantly, never tearing his gaze away from her, just to make sure he was not dreaming, that his former best friend was well and truly standing in front of him.
“Hi.” She smiled softly at him. She could not believe that she had not recognised what had once been the only voice capable of soothing her even on her worst days. To be fair, it had changed remarkably. It was more intense, manly... even sexy.
“You’re back?” He questioned eagerly, a beaming grin breaking through the initial stupor.
MC nodded in response. She could not bring herself to tell him that it was only temporary, or even worse to admit to him that she had not come back for him, that she had never had a single intention of ever seeing him again. She could not be the one to wipe that gorgeous smile from his tantalising lips. It would break her own heart all over again.
As she kept staring into those familiar eyes, a rush of emotions overwhelmed MC. The old crush she had once harboured seemed to reignite with an unexpected intensity. It was unbelievably insane that just one glance at him was all it took to make her flamboyant feelings for him resurface. She thought she had managed to eradicate them, but she had actually only been able to bury them deep inside.
However, with that also came the horrid realisation that Sebastian was carrying a large number of toys in his arms. As MC looked once again at the eye-catching bundles in his arms, reality struck her like a cold breeze.
There, nestled in his grasp, was the object of the rude shock that life had evolved without her, in ways she never could have foreseen. Obviously, these toys were for his children, meaning that Sebastian was also married and had a loving wife waiting at home for him.
MC, still quite in denial, racked her brains to find another rational explication, but there was none. There was no other option because Ominis always said he never wanted kids in order not to pass on his ‘cursed Gaunt genes’. As for Anne… well last time MC had heard of Anne was the day Solomon Sallow died. After that, she had severed all contact with everyone except Ominis, who had promised her not to divulge any information about her whereabouts.
MC’s heart sank as her mind kept repeating itself that Sebastian had moved on, embracing a world that now included the joy and responsibility of raising a family.
“Merlin, MC! I thought I’d never see you again! You’ve missed so many things, there’s so much I need to tell you! Do you live here now?” If Sebastian had ever held a grudge against MC for disappearing without warning, no trace of it was visible. His excitement was taking over completely.
“I have a room at the Hog’s Head.”
“What? The Hog’s Head?” He exclaimed in horror – rather dramatically if you asked MC – “You can't possibly stay in this dodgy shithouse!”
MC was surprised by his crude words. She was used to his outspokenness, but she had not expected to hear it again so soon after such a long time. She could only shrug sheepishly, “I don't really have much choice... Sirona didn't have any more rooms available for me. Everything was booked up… you know… with the holidays.”
“Ah... Well, I can't exactly let a lovely lady like you sleep there. I've got room at home, you can come if you like.” Sebastian puffed out his chest, putting on his false air of chivalry.
MC tried her best to conceal the blush creeping up her cheeks, but alas, she could do nothing about her nervous stammering, “Oh… Oh, I… I don’t wanna bother you. Besides, the Hog’s Head’s not that bad…”
“Don't say no. Please. Really, I insist. We could spend the evening drinking and catching up… What d’you say?” Sebastian gave her the sad puppy eyes, and MC could feel all her resolve slipping away at the same second.
Thinking about it twice, the Hog's Head was truly, absolutely dreadful. The few times MC had been there, she had been catcalled far too many times for her liking.
So yes, she knew that staying with Sebastian, his wife and their children was going to be pure torture, but MC still preferred that to the risk of being mugged or assaulted by one of the Hog's Head patrons.
“Okay.” She ended up saying, forcing a smile that masked her internal turmoil.
“Brilliant!” Sebastian looked so excited that it would not have surprised MC if he had started jumping up and down. “Have you got any luggage you need to pick up in your room before going to my place?”
“No, I've just got this." MC replied, pointing to her small rectangular shoulder bag, barely large enough to hold a box of Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans. “I travel light.”
“Perfect! Well then, if you will follow me, my lady.” He offered her his arm with a wink, and after a brief moment of surprise, she accepted it.
Sebastian made it so effortless to fall back into their old dynamic, that it made it just as natural and easy for MC to do the same. It was like they had never been apart.
They walked together, sticking close to each other, in the same way they used to do when they were still teenagers. As they strolled through the streets of Hogsmeade, MC assumed Sebastian was taking her to a Floo Flame. The girl was therefore genuinely caught off-guard when he stopped in front of her. a small house typical of the village – made of stone with an excessively pointed roof – and took out a key to open the front door.
“Ladies first.” Sebastian's face lit up with pride and joy, while he let MC in first, still the perfect gentleman as usual. Even married, he could not help being flirty.
Before entering, MC took a deep breath to try and calm her nerves, in anticipation of meeting the woman who had succeeded where she had failed, the woman who was better enough than her in Sebastian's eyes to have succeeded in stealing his golden heart.
However, instead of coming face to face with her nemesis, MC found herself immersed in an intimate reflection of Sebastian's essence, overwhelmed by how homey it felt. The house was truly cosy, but a little small for a family in MC's opinion. But then again, it had to be remembered that Sebastian was used to small spaces, having lived in his little one-room cottage in Feldcroft for most of his life.
The living room had the charm of disarray, with stacks of well-read books scattered on the coffee table next to empty mugs, suggesting that Sebastian had not lost his messy habits. The smell of the fireplace and coffee intermingled, creating a comforting atmosphere that reflected precisely the way Sebastian always managed to put MC at ease.
MC guessed that the upstairs, which was in fact a mezzanine, must be the bedroom. She did not dare go upstairs to respect his privacy, but from the ground floor, she could see the top of bookshelves reaching up to the pointed roof, proof that Sebastian was still as thirsty for knowledge as ever.
All these little details showed MC that, although his life had evolved, the man standing a few steps away from her was still her beloved Sebastian.
Sebastian, observing MC's reactions, could not suppress a grin, "It's not much, but it's home. You can have the bedroom, and I'll sleep on the couch.”
On further inspection of the house, MC came upon the kitchen, which was open to the living room. She could not help noticing that the worktops bore the marks of failed culinary experiments. Some pans with burnt bottoms were abandoned on the counter, and dirty cutlery had accumulated in the sink. In short, the kitchen was a mess, just as Sebastian could be in other people's lives.
However, what stood out most to MC was the absence of signs of shared living. There were no visible traces of another person – no stray belongings, no indications of a partner or children. It was as if the whole house resonated with Sebastian alone, as if his whole person had become woven into the fabric of his environment.
As MC continued to stare in silence at his topsy-turvy house, Sebastian scratched the back of his neck nervously, “Don't pay attention to the shambles, please. I didn't clean up... since I wasn't exactly expecting any guests.”
Instead of reassuring him as she would have liked, MC's curiosity was quicker to take over her next words, “Where’s your wife?”
“My wife?” Sebastian frowned.
“Yes. The woman you married.” She added bitterly. Her curiosity slowly lowered its mask to reveal its true self of authentic jealousy.
He looked away, but MC could still see that he was biting the inside of his cheek to keep a straight face, “I’m flattered you think I’m charming enough to get a wife, but I’m afraid there’s still no Mrs. Sallow. Besides Anne, of course.”
“Oh.”
“Oh?” Sebastian chuckled at her enigmatic reaction.
“I thought the toys were for your kids…” She admitted shyly, pretty embarrassed after making so many wrong assumptions about him.
“My kids? Bloody hell, MC, you sure have high expectations for me!” Sebastian exclaimed, clearly amused by the situation. “But no, I don't have kids. The toys are for my niece.”
MC was gob smacked, eyes wide and mouth agape, “Your… niece? You have a niece? Anne had a child? Wait, did she get married? With who?”
“That’s a lot of questions.” He smirked playfully at her, while looking for a bottle in one of his cabinets. “But I think you can guess the answer to the last one.”
MC looked down at her feet, taking a moment to think, when realisation hit her like a bolt of lightning. She turned her head back to Sebastian so fast it almost gave her whiplash, “Ominis?”
“Bingo.” Sebastian replied casually, uncorking a bottle of Firewhiskey. “And he took Anne's name. He's Mr. Sallow now.”
“No way!” She gasped, letting herself fall limply onto the sofa out of utter stupefaction.
“Yes way.” He laughed wholeheartedly, sitting down next to her and pouring two glasses of alcohol for each of them.
"How? When?"
"Apparently, after fifth year, they did more than just keep in touch."
MC took her glass in hand, but did not drink from it. She had far too many questions on her mind to take the time to have a sip, "But how did they deal with Anne's curse?"
"It disappeared once you killed Rookwood, since he was the one who cursed her. Apparently, magic disappears with the caster. I learnt all this a few months after graduation, when Anne got back in touch to invite me to their wedding…”
Sebastian suddenly paused in his explanations to down his glass of Firewhiskey in one gulp.
“She wanted to invite you too… I had to explain to her that you'd disappeared without warning." He continued, looking pained, and MC suspected it was not just because of the bitterness of the alcohol.
"I'm sorry." MC winced at her own words. She was pathetic to listen to, using the most clichéd and basic phrase. But it was all she could muster to respond, because it was exactly how she felt. She was profoundly sorry. Sorry to the people she cherished the most, for abandoning them without looking back. But also sorry for herself, because she now had to accept the bitter realisation that she had been absent for so many crucial milestones of their lives.
Sebastian only shook his head, avoiding her gaze and preferring to stare at his empty glass, "Why did you do that? Why didn't you say anything? I was worried sick ‘cause I thought something bad had happened to you, that some Ashwinders were still out there, and had kidnapped you. I spent months looking for you... I'd even asked the Aurors to search for you.”
MC sipped her drink slowly, using the alcohol as a distraction from the painfully heartbreaking explanations of the man sitting next to her
“…They eventually found you overseas. In perfect health... and in perfect company so I've heard. That's when I realised that you hadn't been taken away, but had gone away of your own free will.” Sebastian poured himself another glass before throwing it back again.
“I'm so sorry.”
He scoffed bitterly, “I don't want to hear that you're sorry. It's no use. I just want to know what you were thinking when you left.”
This time, it was MC's turn to down her glass before pouring her heart out in the most honest way possible, "I just needed to get away from everything, from the past. I just wanted to start again."
Against all odds, he nodded understandingly, "Wish I could stay mad at you for it... but I won’t say that I don’t understand."
What he did next surprised MC in the most pleasant way. Sebastian reached out towards her, placing his large hand on top of hers, which was resting on the brown leather of the sofa. Even if his hand was calloused and weathered by time and experience, MC was amazed by how perfectly it fit around her own.
"What matters is that you're here now." He offered her a tender smile that warmed her heart in the most appeasing way. Only he could do that to her.
"I am." MC smiled in return, even more brightly. It was contagious. She turned her hand over and intertwined their fingers together.
As their conversation died down, MC could not help but steal a moment to observe the transformation in Sebastian’s appearance. The once-adorable teenage boy she remembered had blossomed into a handsome man. His features, chiselled by the passage of time, sculpted a strong jawline that added a touch of rugged refinement to his countenance. The shadow of a beard adorned his face, giving him a distinguished and slightly mysterious air. Sebastian's tousled hair fell with a casual elegance, framing a face that bore the subtle imprints of life's experiences, such as a scar on his eyebrow arch that MC had never seen before.
The only remaining trace of the boyish charm that MC had cherished years ago, was the constellations of freckles that beautifully decorated his face. They had always made MC weak in the knees, but the butterflies in her stomach were multiplied tenfold now that they were highlighted by his light tan.
MC internally begged herself to stop ogling him before she fell further under his spell (if that was even possible, considering how head over heels she was for him).
She poured herself another drink and cleared her throat, “You said you wanted to catch up over drinks, right? Go ahead. Tell me about yourself.”
As Sebastian spoke, MC found herself captivated by the way he carried himself – his confidence unaltered after all these years, and the assurance with which he gestured. There was an understated magnetism in the way he spoke, a reflection of the man he had become since they last parted. As he easily recounted all he had achieved, MC marvelled at the beauty of the journey that had transformed him into the person sitting in front of her.
And so, MC listened attentively, desperate to know everything she had missed about him. She thus learnt that, after Hogwarts, Sebastian had joined the Auror recruitment programme. His first reason was that it was a profession he was passionate about, and that allowed him to do what he loved all day long. The second reason – and perhaps the most important – was because he knew that this career would help him to achieve noble things. In other words, it was his way of making amends for all the mistakes he had made in the past, in the hope that Anne would eventually forgive him too (which had taken a long time, but eventually worked out).
After having been accepted into the programme, Sebastian knew that he would not be able to stay in Feldcroft, firstly because the cottage held too many painful memories, but also because it was now Anne and Ominis' shared home. Consequently, he had found himself a small studio in London, not far from the Ministry. However, even after spending several months there, it just never felt like home to him. He resented the lack of green space, and the fact that he always had to check that none of his Muggle neighbours noticed that he was a wizard. So he moved again.
Looking for a place that was both in the heart of the Highlands and still bustling with life, Sebastian found only one possibility: Hogsmeade. The small, all-wizarding village met all his expectations, and the Ministry was easy to reach thanks to the Floo Network. And so, Sebastian moved into this small cottage, perfect for his life as a bachelor.
“So Auror Sallow, huh?” MC said playfully. “Well, can Auror Sallow win a duel against Ancient Magic Prodigy MC?”
“He sure hopes he can, since it’s supposed to be his job.” Sebastian laughed along with her.
“Do you want to put yourself to the test?” She cocked an eyebrow at him mischievously.
“You know I never shy away from a duel.” He replied with the same spark of deviltry in his eyes.
Without wasting any more time, Sebastian stood up, then turned to MC, holding out his hand to help her up. It was a simple gesture, but it was enough to make MC's cheekbones turn pink, as would any act of affection she received from Sebastian.
The two took their positions, taking a few steps apart before facing each other. It had been years since they last engaged in the exhilarating dance of magical duelling, a pastime that had once defined their youth, especially after being named Crossed Wands champions for three years running.
"Ready?" Sebastian grinned, the confidence of experience illuminating his eyes.
"Always." MC replied, wand at the ready, and they prepared to rediscover the thrill that had bound them together in shared laughter and friendly rivalry.
Ever the perfect gentleman, Sebastian let MC commence hostilities.
“Expelliarmus!”
“You're off to an easy start.” Sebastian laughed after brushing the attack off with a simple Shield Charm. “Confringo!”
MC deflected the spell just as easily, smirking right back at him, “You're off to a predictable start.”
A symphony of lights ensued, as sparks and spells flew, and the air shimmered with the energy of their magical prowess. MC’s spells were fluid and controlled, a testament to the skill she had honed over the years. Sebastian, however, moved with a newfound grace and precision, his every movement reflecting the growth and mastery he had attained thanks to the Auror training.
The duelling only grew in intensity as the two friends weaved intricate spells, each trying to outmanoeuvre the other. Laughter and teasing remarks echoed through the night as memories of their youth resurfaced in the midst of their magical exchange.
After several long and intense minutes of competing against each other, Sebastian unexpectedly directed his wand away from MC, aiming instead at the ceiling, and more precisely at the chandelier hanging from it.
“Glacius!” The candles obviously failed to resist the ice and were instantly extinguished on contact, plunging the room into semi-darkness.
Distracted by the newfound refined strategy established by Sebastian – which he had no doubt learnt to put in place at the speed of light during one of his courses – MC did not notice Sebastian disappear under a Disillusionment Charm, which was all the more effective as there was hardly any light in the living room, apart from the orange flames crackling in the fireplace.
With a final, masterful flick of his wand, Sebastian cast the final blow, “Depulso.”
MC found herself propelled to the floor, her back slamming against the sofa. Judging by the underwhelming low force of the impact, it was easy to guess that he had restrained himself, so as not to hurt her.
“Looks like I've had my long-awaited revenge for fifth year. I've finally bested you in a duel." Sebastian, breathing slightly heavier but grinning ear to ear, extended a hand to help her up.
MC, refusing to admit defeat, grabbed Sebastian's hand but only to make him fall to the ground beside her. She rolled them over until she was astride him, holding him firmly down.
She grinned down at him, “Really? Because I actually think I’ve won.”
He barked a laugh, “And I think you've forgotten the rule that you're not allowed to use physical violence in a wizard duel.”
“Since when do we play by the rules?”
Their gazes met for the umpteenth time that night, but this time was different. It was as if time had come to a standstill, as if the world had momentarily stopped spinning for them, just to let them savour the closeness of the moment.
MC kept staring into Sebastian's chocolate eyes, and was truly taken aback by what she saw in them. His eyes, once full of youthful curiosity, now sparkled with a different kind of radiance. They shone with a brightness that seemed to reflect the happiness and contentment he had found in his life. The laughter lines around his eyes only enhanced their glow, and as MC looked into those bright, expressive eyes, she could not help but feel a sense of joy for the man who had evolved from the adorable teenage friend she once knew, into the confident and content individual currently lying on the ground beneath her.
In those eyes, she saw the echoes of the genuine happiness that had transformed Sebastian into the person he was meant to be, the person she should have met from the very beginning of fifth year, if only Anne had never been cursed by Rookwood.
But now Sebastian was completely fulfilled with every aspect of his life. It was as plain as the nose on his face. And the feeling was made all the clearer by the fact that his lively eyes were perfectly matched by his wide toothy grin, which shone brightly even in the middle of the darkened living room.
After eventually snapping out of her thoughts, MC pulled herself away from Sebastian and helped him straighten up, “I’m proud of you, Seb, of what you’ve become. The future Mrs. Sallow will be very lucky to have a capable man like you by her side.”
Sebastian sat down next to her on the floor, facing the fireplace, and back resting against the sofa behind them, “She’ll never be as lucky as Mr. MC will be. I hope he’ll realise he’s got the most brilliant witch of the world by his side.”
MC grabbed his arm and hugged it close to her chest, while hooking her leg over one of his. Their limbs were tangled together, clinging to each other. Sebastian seemed to have no objection to this new positioning. In fact, he seemed quite delighted as he wrapped an arm around the shoulders of the girl next to him.
“What d’you think he’ll be like, my future husband?” She asked quietly.
“He’ll have to be right for you.” He replied all too solemnly.
A small laugh escaped her, “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means it has to be someone who will know how to take care of you, and give you everything you need to be happy, without a single shred of hesitation. It will be someone who's worthy of standing by your side and will be able to protect you from any danger… so basically someone who'll be able to defeat me in a duel."
"Seems like I'll be stuck with you for the rest of my life, then." MC continued to smile, but it was no longer in amusement. It was something more akin to contentment.
Sebastian mirrored her expression, "Perhaps you will. I can’t imagine it'd be too bad, would it?"
"Apart from your occasional bad temper, I think I could take it." She rested her head on his strong shoulder.
MC was not sure whether it was the fatigue accumulated from her perpetual travels, or the feeling of being in a warm, comfortable home, or even the fact of being reunited with Sebastian (it was probably all three), but her eyelids became heavy without her even realising it, leading her into a peaceful sleep.
“I'm going to celebrate Christmas at Anne and Ominis' house tomorrow. You're coming.” Sebastian declared out of the blue, without realising that the girl had started dozing off.
“What? No, Seb, I can’t do that. I can’t just barge in when I wasn’t invited.” MC mumbled groggily.
“You don’t need an invitation, MC. It’s you. You’re always welcome.” He retorted instantly, as if it was the most common fact to ever exist. “Plus, they miss you, so they’ll be the happiest people in the world if you show up.”
“I won't even have a present to give them...” She muttered like a pouting small child, which made it impossible for Sebastian to hold back a chuckle.
“You're back. Believe me, that's better than any present you could buy.”
Sebastian's fingers subconsciously started tracing invisible shapes on her arm, effectively lulling her back to sleep.
❄∗❆∗❅⁂∗☃∗⁂❅∗❆∗❄
The next morning, MC was woken by the few rays of winter sunshine that the curtains had failed to hold back. Keeping her eyes closed to enjoy a few more minutes of rest, she rolled onto her stomach and was pleasantly surprised by the feel of soft sheets against the skin of her face. But what struck her most was that she could smell Sebastian's perfume all around her, as if she were immersed in one of the bottles.
Completely enveloped by the sophisticated fusion of woody undertones and hints of vetiver, and the enigmatic charm it carried, MC opened her eyes and realised that she had indeed spent the night in Sebastian's bed. On seeing this, MC let herself think that Sebastian had slept in the same bed as her, and that perhaps, with a little bit of luck, he reciprocated her feelings.
A flutter of anticipation flickered within her, one that prevented her from staying in bed any longer. Without wasting any more time, MC descended the mezzanine stairs to the living room, where Sebastian was already sitting on the couch, Daily Prophet in hand.
“Good morning, sleeping beauty.” Sebastian greeted her with a smile when he noticed her standing at the bottom of the stairs.
MC realised he must have been up for quite some time, for he was freshly cleaned up – the lack of stubble which had been present the previous day was testament to it – and already dressed up for the imminent Christmas reunion. He was clad in a tan windowpane shirt, coupled with a gingerbread brown vest matching his tailored pants. The choice of colours could not have been more perfect. All those shades of brown brought out all his most majestic features: his unruly yet soft hair, his freckled skin, his warm and reassuring eyes…
Sebastian was making it humanly impossible to tear one’s gaze away from his god-like appearance, and MC could not resist making a comment about it.
“Morning, handsome.” She smirked playfully back at him.
“Did you sleep well?”
“Better than ever.” MC admitted, a discreet pink tinting her cheekbones. “Just a question, though. How did I get up there?”
“I carried you, of course. Couldn't let you sleep on the floor. What kind of host would I have been?”
“And… you slept…?”
“On the couch. Just like I told you I would.” Sebastian smiled tenderly.
“Right.”
And with these few simple words, reality dawned on MC. Disappointment settled in, like a gentle snowfall dampening the warm embers of her previous hope that Sebastian harboured feelings for her.
The truth was that he had chosen the sofa over sharing the bed with her, a sign that he still viewed MC as nothing more than a friend. The girl felt her heart tug, like a reminder of why she had chosen not to be part of his life any more.
MC took a deep breath, “I'm gonna go and get ready, so we don't arrive late at Anne and Ominis'.”
“Anne likes us all to be dressed up for Christmas. We can go and buy you a dress at Gladrags, if you'd like–”
She immediately shook her head, “No, no, it's fine. Don't worry, I've got everything I need.”
MC took out her wand and pointed it at her small shoulder bag on the floor. With a simple flick, the object grew tenfold in volume until it reached the size of a suitcase. MC opened it, revealing that the bag had been enchanted to be bottomless, and she climbed inside it before disappearing. All that could be heard was the sound of her footsteps, and her bustle as she went through all sorts of outfits.
“Talk about travelling light.” Sebastian snickered.
A few moments later, MC emerged back from the suitcase as if climbing a ladder, wearing an ankle-length cotton mahogany dress. The corset hugged her waist perfectly, and highlighted her bust with its square neckline and short puffed sleeves. The dress was nothing extravagant, but the fact that it fit her like a glove was what made it so charming.
“Is this dress all right? Think it'll be nice enough for Anne?” She gave it a twirl, so that Sebastian could see it from every angle, before putting on a black cloak to protect herself from the winter cold.
“It looks great. You look great. Well, not great, actually. I mean– More like stunning. You look stunning, you do. We’re even matching. The colour, I mean. Because obviously you look better than me.” Sebastian stammered awkwardly, his cheeks tinged with a hint of shyness. “Merlin, this is awful. I need to learn to shut up.”
“It’s alright. I understood what you meant, that's the most important thing.” MC could only chuckle at his new bashfulness. She found it absolutely endearing.
Sebastian took a deep breath before speaking more clearly, “What I’m trying to say is… You're beautiful. You’ve always been.”
“Thank you, Seb.” She met his gaze, a gentle smile playing on her lips.
He tried to divert attention from his nervousness by slipping on his long black coat, and grabbing the wrapped gifts for his niece, “Ready to go?”
MC nodded in response, waiting for Sebastian to apparate them. She expected him to grab her by the arm, but instead he wrapped an arm around her waist. He brought her small figure close to him, as if he wanted to make sure that she would be comfortable during the apparition, that there was not even the slightest chance for her to get splinched.
With a loud crack, the world began to spin. Next thing she knew, MC was standing in the middle of the snowy village of Feldcroft. As she tried to right herself, she staggered slightly, dizzy from the apparition, whose effects were far more brutal when someone was doing it for you. Fortunately, Sebastian still had an arm wrapped around her waist to cradle her against him. With his other hand, he grabbed her elbow to steady her.
Once Sebastian was certain that MC was all right, he guided her towards the Sallow cottage, which she had not seen for years. From the outside, it looked much bigger than she remembered, particularly because it had an extra floor. Sebastian explained that he had helped Anne and Ominis enlarge it after their wedding, so that they would have enough room for their future family.
Sebastian was the first to set foot on the cottage porch. He hid MC behind him with his body, to create an effect of surprise, then knocked on the door. It was Anne who answered, appearing in the doorway wearing a sublime ankle-length midnight-blue velvet dress adorned with cultured pearls.
"Sebastian! I told you to buy only one present! She's going to end up spoiled rotten if this keeps up." Anne exclaimed without even greeting her brother.
"She's my only niece. Who am I to spend my money on if not her?"
"How 'bout your sister?" She raised an accusing eyebrow at him, while clearing him of all the packages in his arms.
"Ah, but I've brought a surprise for you too. Look what I found last night…" He intoned with amusement, and stepped aside to reveal MC. "A lost soul who wanted to spend Christmas alone at the Hog’s Head!"
"Oh my, MC!" Anne swiftly pulled the girl into a bear hug. "Ominis, come here!"
"What is it, sweetie?" The blond man called from afar, carrying his daughter in his arms.
Judging by the way he had stopped dead in his tracks, coming to an abrupt halt, MC knew that he had sensed her presence thanks to his sentient wand.
Sebastian decided to take his brother-in-law’s daughter off his hands, so that the two friends could reunite peacefully, "Hey, little monster! Wanna give a hug to Uncle Seb?"
Meanwhile, MC approached her old friend and spoke softly, "Hello, Ominis."
Knowing that Ominis was not very comfortable with physical contact, especially with people he did not know well, MC was not sure how to greet him. So it came as a great surprise when he made no hesitation whatsoever and took her in his arms, holding her tightly.
"I should be telling you off for disappearing... but I'm not going to. Not today." Ominis whispered in her ear.
She chuckled lightly, "I'm happy to see you too."
"Let me take your coat." He offered after pulling away.
MC untied the ribbon from her cloak, and handed it to Ominis. She then turned to Sebastian to pick up the toddler in his arms, so that he too could remove his thick winter coat.
"Hi, little princess. I'm a friend of your mummy and daddy, and your uncle Sebastian too." MC cooed in a honeyed voice. She could not help noticing that the little girl in her arms was the perfect amalgam of her two parents. She had all her mother's features, but with meadow-blonde hair and grey-blue eyes like her father.
"Unkie! Unkie!" She pouted and made big gestures with her arms to indicate that she wanted to go back to her uncle. She truly was an uncle's little girl.
"I'm here, baby.” Sebastian immediately took her back into his arms, after giving Ominis his coat, to cradle her. “You don't have to be scared of MC. She's really nice too, you know."
"Auntie?" The one-year-old asked hesitantly, reaching out to wrap her hand around MC's index finger.
"That's right, that's Auntie MC." Sebastian encouraged her. It was impressive how he naturally had his way with kids.
It may have been silly, but something as simple as being called Auntie by a child she had just met, as well as by Sebastian, awakened something in her, a sense of belonging that had been dormant for a long time. She truly felt like a fully-fledged member of this family.
Anne suddenly let out a sigh, "I'd love to be able to celebrate the reunion with you, but I've still got lots of things to do in the kitchen. Sebastian, can you look after the baby while Ominis lays the table?"
"I'll come and help you, Anne." MC declared.
"Thank you, MC. You're too kind." Anne exited the living room, followed by MC.
“So… You and Ominis, huh?” MC started once they were alone. She was sitting across from Anne at the small kitchen table which was covered in food stains from preparing the meal.
Anne immediately shook her head, “Oh, no, no. We’ll have plenty of time to talk about my marital life later. Let's talk about how you ended up here with my brother after all these years."
"We ran into each other last night in Hogsmeade. He offered me to sleep over, and we basically spent the better part of the night talking." MC shrugged.
"And?” Anne pried impatiently. “What happened?"
"Nothing. What do you want to happen?”
“Nothing. It was just a random question.” Anne replied coyly while she finished icing the Yule log. “So, update me as well. Where are you in life? Have you met anyone?”
“No, not at all. I haven't really had time for that.”
“That's a shame.”
“What – uhm – What about him?” MC did not look up from the kilted soldiers she was preparing, in an attempt to appear nonchalant. Needless to say, it was a failure.
“Who?” Anne feigned ignorance.
MC heaved a sigh, deciding to finally meet her friend's gaze, “Sebastian. Has he met anyone recently?”
Anne bit the inside of her cheek, "I think you should ask him directly."
"I'm scared it'll be awkward…"
"Well… if you want to know everything, he hasn’t courted anyone since you went away. He claims that he's not interested in dating, that he’s focusing on becoming a proper Auror first. He always finds an excuse to avoid admitting that he's already got a girl on his mind, but is too much of a coward to act upon it."
MC felt her heart skip a beat. A cold realization settled over her, making her stop everything she was doing. Her heart sank, the weight of unspoken truths pressing upon her, and she forced a tight-lipped smile, concealing the ache within as she navigated the sudden revelation that someone else was in Sebastian's heart, and it was not her.
MC swallowed thickly, "Has he known her for long?"
"Several years."
"And is she a good person? Does she treat him well?"
"He's never been happier than when he's with her." Anne admitted with a sincere smile that contrasted drastically with the unsettled look that MC was unable to disguise.
"Who is it?" She asked weakly, not entirely sure she wanted to know the answer.
"I fear that’s too much information, and that's not for me to tell. Just ask him."
Without another word on the matter, Anne gracefully pivoted, excusing herself to go back to the living room and announce that the meal was ready. MC took a moment to compose herself, swallowing the bitter pill of disappointment before joining the others in the living room.
Seated at the table, surrounded by the warmth of holiday decorations and the aroma of a festive feast, the four friends engaged in a pleasant chatter. The clinking of cutlery and laughter created a veneer of normalcy. They reminisced adventures from their time at Hogwarts, shared stories about their jobs, exchanged anecdotes about Anne and Ominis’s little one, and indulged in the delights of the Christmas meal.
“So, MC, what have you been up to during your travels?” Ominis asked as he had just finished feeding his daughter.
MC swallowed her mouthful of turkey before replying, “Well, you know, trying to explore the world and discover new places. Honestly, I’ve just been searching for a place that makes me want to stay, that feels like home.”
“And have you found that place yet?”
MC was silent for a moment. How was she supposed to explain that she had found this special place years ago, but had fled far away from it, just to search the world for something similar? Because if MC was willing to face the truth, she knew that her home was wherever Sebastian was.
Sebastian was her home.
It was quite ironic that he did not feel the same way about her…
“I… I’m not sure.” MC finally said.
“…Does that mean you’ll be back on the road again?” Ominis questioned again, but this time with caution.
“Yes. I leave tomorrow morning.” MC replied resolutely.
The clatter of dropped cutlery echoed like an unintentional punctuation to the tremendous silence that followed. Eyes widened, gazes met with uncertainty, and an unspoken tension pulsed through the room.
Anne was the first to break the palpable unease by raising her voice, “What? But you just came back! You can’t leave so soon.”
The next sound came from Sebastian's chair legs scraping the floor as he stood up abruptly and threw his napkin on the table, “Excuse me. I need some fresh air.”
His eyes did not meet anyone's as he left the table. Without even grabbing his coat, he stormed out of the house. The door slammed behind him and echoed through the deathly hush inside.
"What’s up with him? Did I say something wrong?" MC asked, disconcerted. She was completely unaware of the weight of her revelation, which had hit her friends like a tidal wave.
Anne huffed in irritation before shouting at her, "Of course you did, MC! You're supposed to be his best friend! Can't you see how cruel you're being to him?"
Ominis rested a hand on his wife's shoulder, "Calm down, sweetie. It's not her fault MC is dense."
"Hey!" The girl exclaimed indignantly, but Ominis ignored her.
"Let me put it simply for you, MC. We were all hurt when you left without saying a word, but Sebastian's been a complete wreck ever since. The usual cheerful Sebastian you know was nowhere to be found for years… until today. And that's only because you came back.”
“And now, you've just brutally told him that you plan to disappear tomorrow, and take his happiness with you! Again!" Anne insisted, determined to keep rubbing it in until realisation eventually hit the girl.
Fortunately, it worked quite quickly, but now MC did not know what to do with herself, "I... I didn't know that... I thought he’d just forget about me and move on."
"I thought you knew him better than that. Haven’t you yet realised that you're everything to him? Because it's more than time you do!"
“I… need to talk to him. Excuse me.”
MC, in turn, rushed out of the cottage, only grabbing Sebastian's coat in her haste.
The freezing air greeted her as she stepped outside, snowflakes landing on her hair and the bare skin of her arms. Thankfully, it did not take her long to spot Sebastian, who had moved slightly away from the house to lean against a tree, his shoulders hunched slightly against the winter chill.
She approached him slowly, but with a determined step, the snow crunching under her feet. She knew he had heard her by the way he straightened up, even though he seemed intent on ignoring her.
“Seb, come back inside. It’s freezing, you’re gonna catch your death.” She implored him, covering herself with her arms to protect herself from the icy wind.
“What’s it to you? You won’t even be there to see it.” He replied even more coldly than the weather, without even turning to look at her.
“…Put on your coat at least.” She insisted, extending it to him.
Sebastian took the coat from her, but instead of putting it on like expected, he draped it over her, so that she would not get cold. His hands lingered on her shoulders, which were now protected by the thick felt.
At last, he met her gaze, his eyes silently pleading with her, “Am I not good enough for you to stay? Not good enough for you to notice me?”
MC grabbed his wrists as if by instinct, “Seb, of course you’re plenty enough. You’re my oldest friend–”
Sebastian sighed in annoyance and pulled away from her, “But can’t you see it’s not enough for me?”
“…What?”
Sebastian reached into his pocket, retrieving a small velvet box. He had always imagined giving her this gift with a broad smile, but now he was opening the box with a rueful frown, to reveal a delicate ring.
“I wanted to give it to you a little after we graduated. I wanted to give it to you to confess my feelings. I wanted that ring to be a symbol of my devotion, and a promise to always remain loyal to you… Turned out life had other plans because you left the day I bought it.”
“Sebastian…” MC croaked out, doing her best to fight back the tears that threatened to fall as she stared at the magnificent jewel that was the poignant representation of all the missed opportunities and lost time.
"Now’s a good time to give it to you, I think. If you’re going to leave again, might as well be honest while I have the chance, before you run away like last time." He said acrimoniously as he placed the ring on her finger.
"Wha…” The shock took away MC's voice before she could even finish her sentence. Her eyes were riveted on the golden band. “What about the girl you like? Anne told me you were interested in someone."
"The girl I like?” He laughed humourlessly. “MC, I've been ridiculously and irrevocably in love with you since fifth year, since the day you kicked my arse in Hecat’s class. You literally knocked me off my feet. I know I didn't always show it well, but it's true, it's always been you.”
MC let out a pained grunt and hid her face in her hands in shame, "Oh Merlin, Seb... I've been such an idiot."
“Why?” Sebastian frowned.
“I've always loved you too. But I was so miserable thinking I'd never be anything more than your friend, that I decided to disappear to try and forget you.”
“And? Please, tell me it didn’t work.” His words came out desperate, almost begging.
She took his face between her hands, and lovingly caressed his cold cheeks, “It didn’t. How could I ever forget you? Being away from you only made me miss you more.”
His hands came down to rest around her waist, bringing her close to his body, in search of both solace and warmth, “It's all right. We're together now. You don't have to leave anymore. All's well that ends well.”
“Well… Not exactly all. You gave me this beautiful ring, and I have nothing to give you in return.”
“I finally have the witch of my dreams back at my side. I couldn’t dream of a better Christmas present.”
Suddenly, MC and Sebastian were interrupted by a cracking sound coming from above them. They looked up and saw a branch of mistletoe sprang out of thin air from one of the branches of the tree they were standing under, its delicate white berries shimmering in the soft glow of the surrounding lights.
Sebastian looked back down at MC, a playful smirk tugging at the corners of his lips, “Actually… I’ve just thought of a gift you could give me.”
The snowflakes descended gracefully around them, creating a magical scene that mirrored the fluttering emotions in their hearts. In that enchanting moment, with the world cocooned in a quiet hush, MC found the fiery courage and desire to close the thin gap between them. Their lips met in a passionate kiss, and their hearts were set alight, for the moment they had dreamt of most in their lives had finally become reality.
Out of enthusiasm, Sebastian tightened his grip around MC, with his arms completely wrapped around her petite frame, enveloping her in such warmth that she completely forgot they were both covered in snow. He pressed and secured her tightly against him, and lifted her off the ground. Out of reflex, the girl's hands travelled up to wrap around his neck to steady herself. Her fingertips grazed his soft curls, sending shivers down her spine.
Unfortunately, their winter wonderland moment was abruptly interrupted by the joyful cheers of their friends inside the house. MC and Sebastian reluctantly pulled away from each other, and turned in the direction of the commotion to see Anne and Ominis glued to the window to spy on them. The wand in Anne's hand was proof enough that it was she who had conjured up the mistletoe.
MC giggled, looking back at her boyfriend with stars in her eyes, and her hands resting in his chest, “Merry Christmas, Seb.”
“Merry Christmas, darling.” He answered softly before leaning in to steal another kiss from her.
MC sincerely hoped there would be another Mrs. Sallow other than Anne next Christmas, for she had finally found her home and never planned on leaving ever again.
❄∗❆∗❅⁂∗☃∗⁂❅∗❆∗❄
Part 2 : Christmas at Home (link)
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sl8yter · 5 months ago
Text
Apparently - Mühl Pt2. to Get It Together
Nika realizes her mistake at the last minute and opens up only to realize she was wrong.
Nika Muhl x Fem Reader
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“Wow twin you’re an asshole” Paiges vocalizes in a brash tone
Nika had come to her friend’s dorm seeking advice on how to proceed after the fallout of her and her girlfriend’s fallout. She had found Paige, KK, and some other teammates hanging out after hours building legos and stuffing their faces with food.
“I dont know what to do. I really do love her I just dont know how to tell her. Nahiem is just a friend she doesnt understand that. She never does.” Nika nervously states as she paces around the table in the middle of the main area as her teammates brain storm solutions for her as they lounge on the couch.
“Okay well first of all stop doing that” KK speaks up
“Doing what?”
“The way you say that she doesn’t understand seems so bashing. Like girl, of course shes gonna kick you out after you talk to her like that. So don’t act surprised” KK’s lack of goofiness acts as a reality check to Nika. Her pacing ends abruptly as she stops to look up and cover her face as an attempt to stop her tears from flowing.
“I could text her to meet up and then Nika could like surprise her with flowers and stuff” Paige says zoning back into the conversation with her faulty solution
“Flowers isnt gonna fix the fact that (yn)s been feeling ignored and how she most likely thinks you’ve been cheating on her. But we can use the first part of Paiges plan. Did you atleast try and text her before you left?” Inês states promptly looking at Nika whos cheeks were wet as she sat down on the couch in between KK and Paige.
“No I came straight here.”
“Oof not good.” Aaliyah butts in
“Why. Please dont make me cry anymore” The Croatian girl says her voice breaking softly towards the end.
“Well if I was her and I already was thinking it. I would personally think that you went to Nahiems. Thats just me though. Maybe (yn) doesn’t jump to conclusions as fast so don’t sweat it.”
“Girl boo, shes already crying about it what do you mean dont sweat it.” KK frankly puts her thoughts out as she wraps an arm around Nikas shoulder, a flimsy attempt to try and comfort the crying girl who’s heart broke a little more with KKs retort.
“I can post to my story and Nika can be in the backround looking all sad.” Paige tries to help
The group looks to Nika who had a contemplating look on her face which contrasted with the pink hue around her eyes and water marks down her cheeks. Her silence deafens the room before she shakes her head up and down.
As Paige takes and post the photo to her instagram story, Nika and the rest of her teamates come up with a plan to try and get (yn) to meet up with Nika in order for them to talk it out. It only takes 20 minutes before (yn) viewed the blondes story and it only took a second for the same blonde to text (yn) to meet up with her at the park 10 minutes away saying it was an emergency.
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"Paige" I whisper yelled as I walked through out the empty park. Paige had only texted me a cryptic message telling me it was an emergency and to meet her at the park near the dorms.
"Paige come out it's to cold for this." I yelled only slightly louder before a hand had grasped my shoulder causing me to release a yelp and break my neck to look behind me. Only to find the last face I wanted to lay my eyes upon.
"Nika what the fuck are you doing? I thought you were gonna kidnap me. Where's Paige?" I asked, scolding Nika for the scare.
"I couldn't wait until tommorrow to see you. She only texted you so I could meet up with you. Listen to me I-"
"I'm gonna stop you right there before you try to say things I've heard from you a thousand times. I'm tired of us having the same conversations over and over again. It never goes anywhere Nika. Now like I said before go and get some sleep so we can both talk about this with a clear head." I state, exasperated at her mood of just now wanting to talk about things when she had so long to do so.
"Listen to me please bebo you can break up with me, yell at me, or call me every dirty word you know just please let me talk to you. You don't even have to face me. Just hear me." Her voice breaks between most words causing her accent to slip. The begging insanely out of character from the confident girl you usually knew.
"Okay. Just tell me what it is. Tell me why you've been such a dickhead to me." I tell her as I walk to a nearby swing to sit. She quietly trails behind me until I hear the clanking of the metal on the swing adjacent to mine. I refrain from looking over to her as I can feel the intensity of her gaze on my features. If I look, I know I'll cry but I have to let her know in someway that I'm going to stand my ground this time. No matter how much it hurts the both of us.
“Im so so sorry bebo. I never meant to hurt you. I never meant for any of this to happen. When we first started dating I seen how amazing you are and how you were so happy all the time and how you always light up a room. Graduating and the draft has been driving me crazy since the start of the year. I felt so pressured to perform my best that I started doubting myself and I started to think that you were too good for me and-“ Her voice breaking as she stops for a moment to catch her breath. She stops looking at me to look at the sights in front of us, her shame showing in her body language
“That I thought I was gonna be a burden to you. Nahiem would help me. We would just go drive around and drink and do all this dumb stuff. It took the edge off and now I see how bad it was. How it lead me to start acting like you weren’t there. I use to think that my biggest fear was not achieving my dreams after I worked so hard for it, for everything. But in truth my biggest fear is achieving all my dreams and you not being there beside me. You’re so selfless that you constantly put up with me no matter how I treated you. I need to treat you better. I want to treat you better. I know I dont show it a lot but i love you more than anything, more than anyone. You believe in me bebo and I love you for it.” She finishes her voice shaky and her eyes somehow pinker than they were before.
“Of course I believe in you. Youre Nika Mühl. My girlfriend and future WNBA star. Youre so much more than you see Nika. Youre the reason I love to love.” I answer, not realizing I was crying as well until a tear drop fell from off my face.
Nika is silent as she wipes her face and quietly clears her throat before looking at me once again.
“You don’t hate me?” Her tender voice somehow making me forgive her within four words.
“I could never hate you. I love you.”
“I love you more” She says before suddenly standing from her seat and lunging at me causing us both to fall into the mulch below us. Her hands hold my waist as my arms wrap around her neck.
“Im so sorry.” Her soft voice fills my ears as the smell of her shampoo invades my brain.
“I forgive you.” Whispering back to the girl on top of me.
“Can I take you to the dorms?” She asks louder this time as she retracts to put her hands on either side of my head to hover above me.
“Only if you stay the night.”
To my response she quickly leans down to capture my lips. I can feel her slightly whimper at the contact. My hands quickly get lost in her hair as she lowers herself to lay between my legs as she continues to assault my lips slightly opening her mouth to encourage me to go farther. I can feel her heart pounding as her chest is flush against mine.
I gently push her off me as I go to sit up, suddenly remembering that it was 2 AM and we were in a public park.
“Take me home and then I’ll see if I want you to go further.” I tell Nika as shes on her knees infront of me, rubbing the sides of my thighs with her large hands.
To my statement Nika swiftly picks me up wedding style and starts jogging to my dorm building. Her antics make me laugh with mirth as I see her small smile, her eyes glancing at me as we lock eye contact for a second that I wish could have lasted forever. Her strength and her athleticism made me thank her coach as it was only helping me in forgiving her completely.
I kiss her cheek softly as she continues her jog.
“I love you so much Nika. I want you to come to me first whenever you have doubts or whenever you start thinking things like that ever again. I love you, I care for you, and I want you to be happy. You mean everything to me.”
She stops jogging for a second to put me down as she grips my waist with speed to pull me into a kiss. Far more passionate than any weve had before. My hands wrapped around her face holding her as if she were glass. Her hands explore my waist, rubbing and squeezing slightly. I caress her jaw moving one hand farther back to play with her hair at the base of her neck.
We both pull back to rest our foreheads against another, our mouths agape catching oxygen as our exhales mix. The lack of space between us was tantalizing as it was obvious both of us wanted more. The only thing stopping us,being our lung capacity and the open space.
“I dont think I can wait much longer for you” Nika admits her eyes dark with a familiar cloud of lust. The breathiness in her voice causing a feeling that Nika was all too well associated with inside my body.
“Then lets hurry up.” I say tauntingly as I knew she was gonna be the one running us both back to bed. I knew she could do it, she knew I could match her pace and run along side her, but we both knew how much hotter it would be if she did all the work and how much better it would be in bed.
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Changed my mind, tried writing a smut for this but then I was like rereading it and ts was so toxic. Oh em gee. Like on a deep level if yall like ts great for you I just cant post something like it n be okay with myself after 😭😭🙏
REQUEST SOME THINGS YALL. DONT BE SCARY!!
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chishiyaisasnack · 1 year ago
Text
It’s under my skirt, Doctor
Hello everyone! It’s been a while. I finally got this little thing together, and I hope you all like it.
Disclaimer! This is smut. Stay away if you aren’t of agw or if you’re uncomfortable with the topic. Remember to use protection in real life!
Written and posted on mobile, I apologize for any wierd formatting.
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Chishiyas life was work. Long hours, sometimes so long that he didn’t leave the hospital before his next shift. The couch in his office had become soft from where he slept, countless days and nights spent there alone. Not that it mattered, not to him. He liked his job. Kind of. There was nothing else he wanted to do anyway, so filling his life with something that kept his brain occupied and evolving was good enough. Once he stopped caring about all the injustice he focused solely on performing surgeries. The heart was an interresting thing, so small, so powerful. One wrong move and a life could end. Sometimes he wondered what that would feel like. He would never play with a life like that, he wasn’t completely insane, but the thought had showed up once or twice.
This particular shift got his mood turning all over the place. Everyone was whiny, rude and just hard to deal with. Twelve hours of pretending to be respectful was hard enough on the good days.
When he got back to his office he sank down into the couch, contemplating buying new cushions soon because they were starting to get uncomfortable. He needed to get his mind cleared out, to stop thinking about work and kids and parents who he wanted to toss in the trashcan.
A vibration went off in his pocket, making his head hurt just thinking about what they would need him for now. He just wanted to rest. So, when he picked it up and saw the notification on his screen he got pleasently suprised.
Y/N: Hey, sorry to disturb your work but I have a medical issue that I wondered if you could take a look at? I can come over in 10 minutes if that works for you.
He couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face. Normal people didn’t use the words ”medical issue” as a synonym for ”I want to fuck” but it worked very well for the two of them. Chishiya had met her at a work gathering and that turned out to be the best stress reliever he could wish for, and he knew that she used him for that exact same reason. Some might say that they were dating, but the only times they really met in person was just for sex and maybe some lunch afterwards. Chishiya did spend occasional nights at her place since she lived closer to the hospital than he did, and getting his dick wet then sleep in a bed instead of his office couch was a nice change.
Ten minutes later the telltale three knocks on his office door woke him up from his thoughts. Trying not to run to the door in excitement, he stood up, took a deep breath and changed into his normal ’I don’t care about anything’-face before opening it. The ’not caring about anything’-face changed as soon as he saw what was on the other end of the doorframe. He was not prepared for her standing there, panties hanging from slender fingers on one of her hands and her head cocked to the side. The skirt she was wearing was short and flowy, almost revealing what was, or rather what wasn’t underneath it.
”Eager are we?” Chishiya welcomed her in a smug voice, trying to hide the mess his head was already in. She winked at him in response.
”You usually don’t have very long so I thought I’d be prepared.” She walked straight to him, put the underwear in the chest pocket of his white doctors coat and kicked the door closed behind her. Chishiya could hear the click from the lock but was more interrested in the cleavage that her ”too tight to be comfortable”-top was showing. He didn’t even try to hide that he liked what he saw. He knew she liked it. A finger under his chin woke him up from his thoughts and when he looked up he was met with sparkling eyes full of excitement when she gazed back into his.
”Hmm.. I like how professional you look in this outfit” she purred as she smoothed her hands up his chest until she reached his neck, hands tangling in the blonde strands in the back until his hair tie fell to the floor, one thumb tracing his ear. ”I’d let you examine me any day.”
Chishiya rolled his eyes at her attempt at flirting, but rather than giving her a comeback he reached in and put his hands on her bare thighs, inching further up while he kissed that lovely space between her neck and shoulder that made her whimper every time.
”So, what did you want me to take a look at?” Chishiya murmered teasingly into her ear. She hummed and moved her hands back down to his shoulders, gripping onto the neck of his coat.
”It’s under my skirt, Doctor.”
In one swift move she grabbed the stethoscope still hanging around his neck and pulled him with her until they both hit the wall behind her, before crashing her lips into his with urgency, and Chishiya returned it with just as much desire as he was given. It was intoxicating, her soft lips, the sweet smell of her perfume, her hands tugging at his hair trying to coax him closer.
His hands went from her thighs to her waist, with just a quick squeeze at her ass first, clenching his fingers in the fabric of her shirt, pulling her even closer so that she could feel that this was affecting him too. His cock was already getting hard, pushing uncomfortably against his pants, but her soft stomach gave great friction whenever she moaned and rubbed herself against him.
Trying to deepen the kiss, she slid her tounge against his lips, making him smile against her whine when he didn’t answer her attempt. He was the one calling the shots and he wanted her to remember that. Instead of giving her what she wanted he pried his lips away from hers and targeted her neck.
The sweet sounds she made whenever his lips caressed her made his head spin. He couldn’t keep his hands still any longer and torturously slow started to inch them up the skin under her top, feeling the way she moved under them, how she was shivering against his touch and how her lungs moved with every heated breath that left her. He knew that undressing her probably wasn’t the best idea in case someone managed to interrupt them, but when he felt her breast under his palms, so soft and squeazable and utterly wonderful to nibble at, his desire to put his face between them took over his rationality. So, after he sucked down on the skin on her shoulder - and grinned at the sour moan she made - he pulled her top off and started his descent down her body. Somewhere in the back of his mind he heard the thump that her head made when she threw it back against the wall but he was far more interrested in the goosebumps that spread under the line he licked down her collarbone. When he finally moved his mouth over her nipple he felt a hand grip his shoulder with a strenght that was sure to leave a mark.
The noises she made went straight to Chishiyas cock. His mind was so clouded by the need to be inside her that he was having trouble keeping his teasing facade in check. Nestling his face in her chest did ground him a bit though, it was the whines that followed it that made him throb in his pants.
”Fuck, Chishiya… lower please” she begged, shivering when he swept his tounge over her other nipple. The gentle squeeze from his other hand earned him another whimper - and a fist in his hair trying to push him further down. He complied with a quiet laugh, loving how aroused she was from just this. Not that he had anything to say about that, he was aching just as bad as she was.
He didn’t bother to take her skirt off, he just held it up with one hand while running the other up her inner thigh, slow and steady so that he could hear her quiet complaints that he took too long.
”Hold it” he commanded, looking at her and then the skirt, nodding towards it to make his point. A shaky hand took a hold of the hem of the skirt and he shifted his focus back to her soft thighs, leading up to her glistening center that he couldn’t wait to be inside. He couldn’t help himself and squeezed the inside of her thigh, thinking about how great it would feel to have them wrapped around him - then laughed at her impatient grunt before giving in and giving her what she asked for.
With one hand he hiked her leg over his shoulder and then he dove in and let his tounge spread her open, loving the wetness he was met with. A cascade of ’yes’-es fell from her mouth as she rolled her hips in time with his tounges movements. A long lick between the folds, flicking over the clit, sucking, kissing, circling… he knew exactly what she liked and he gave it to her. Every time her moans got a little louder he slowed down, dragging out the sensation (and pissing her off just a little just because he could). It was his favourite leisure activity and he could go for hours if he had the time. Unfortunately he didn’t and with a last lick he stopped, her disappointed groan chiming like music in his ears.
He rose to his feet, one hand still lingering on her thigh, the other moving a strand of hair from her face that was so lovely and flushed from desire. There was a hint of irritation from the way her eyebrows scrunched together, but it disappeared when he used the same hand that he just caressed her cheek with to draw a line along her pussy, wet and warm, and so inviting, making her squirm under his touch.
”I want to take my time with you but we’re in a bit of a hurry,” he reminded her. ”Come here.”
Chishiya started walking towards the couch, sat down and patted his lap as an invitation for her to sit.
”I’m tired and have been working all day,” Chishiya playfully told her, watching her eyes roll as she walked towards him, which made him chuckle. He enjoyed how obvious she was with everything and that she didn’t take any of his shit. She was strong and powerful and he wouldn’t have a chance against her wits if she wanted to ruin him. And he didn’t want it any other way.
”You need a new couch” she complained while straddling his lap, knees sinking down too far and throwing off her balance before she put her hands on his shoulder and shuffled her way forward to hover over his length.
”But I really like my couch” he lied, lazily putting his hands on her waist to pretend to help her.
”Sure you do. Take off your pants, or are you too tired to do that to, Doctor?”
For once he hurried, mostly because his dick was aching and he couldn’t wait for it to be inside her. So he moved his pants and boxers out of the way, enough to release his cock. She didn’t waste a second and sank down onto it right away.
Both of them moaned, her from finally being filled and him from finally being hugged by her warm, wet walls. When she started to move, riding him nice and deep, he couldn’t help himself and let his head fall back so he could watch her face as she fucked herself on him.
”Fuck, I’ve been needing this” he groaned as she took him in, Chishiya pushing as far in as he could to savour that warm and tight feeling that her insides gave him. ”You feel so good.”
”Fuck…” was the only answer he got, but it sounded perfect. Breathless and broken, turning into another moan when his cock hit her sweet spot again.
She rode him deep and fast, her wet walls stroking his cock in rhythm with her movements. Desperate to feel more of it, he bucked up into her to bury himself as deep as he could. Her hands was on his shoulders, nails digging deep into his white coat.
Chishiyas hands were everywhere, grabbing her ass hard as she bounced on his lap, sliding up her waist when he went back to rolling her hips, cupping her breasts when he took over and fucked her from below. The bliss on her face drove him on, making him thrust harder and angling his hips so that he hit that spongy spot inside her with every thrust. He could feel her getting close, her insides tightening and clamping down around his cock, stroking the life out of him with it. He wouldn’t last much longer either - he needed her to come so that he could join her. So he slid a hand down to her center, putting two fingers on her clit and started to circle it in time with his thrusts. The loud groan she let out at the sensation made the fire in his stomach grow even more and, fuck, he needed her to orgasm.
”Y/N, come for me,” he hissed and pressed down harder on her clit. ”Fuck, come on my cock.”
And so she did. With a rough moan into his neck he felt her walls clamping down on his cock, so fucking tight, before convulsing around him. Maybe he should have stopped and let her catch her breath but his hips moved at their own will now. He fucked her with desperation, each thrust bringing him closer, until he emptied himself deep inside her. She moaned as he did, rocking her hips to stimulate him more until his cock had stopped twitching.
Chishiyas hands landed on her waist again, this time drawing soft circles on her skin, making her shiver under his touch. Her breath was warm against his neck when she nuzzled her face there. He let her rest on him, he was too satisfied to move anyway. They sat like that until both their breathing had calmed down, and until he had gone soft enough to slip out of - although he didn’t want to. She felt too good. But even he wasn’t able to control his body that much. He had tried.
When she moved it was with shaky legs, tired from overworking them on that dumb couch. He smirked as he helped her up onto her feet, casting a glance on the clock hanging on the wall above his desk. There were still time to have some more fun, and even if his dick was tired, his tounge wasn’t. Standing up next to her he bent in, moved a strand of her hair away from her face, and softly spoke into her ear.
”So, is there anything else you want me to examine?”
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