#tom's 'I've killed loads of vampires. it don't change ya.' from the penultimate episode really feels like it needs to be addressed

[annabelle--cane]

okay. collection of disparate thoughts on the good hal/bad hal thing:

-> I get, mechanically, why they went for it as a creative decision. I can buy the hal we see in the cutler flashbacks and the hal we see in the present day as being the same person because they're separated by sixty years, people change with time, but clearly what they wanted was for hal to go full villain mode in the last episode, and simply making him have a breakdown and do a heel turn on his personality wouldn't make sense. and like, last episode evil!hal is really fun, he's a smug villain who does dance numbers and is blunt enough to deliver the show's thesis as parting wisdom, I see the reasoning.

-> but I'm not sure how much of that was planned from hal's introduction? he says things like "I've been so many people" and "you've got the wrong man, I'm not him anymore," but it always reads as more metaphorical until s5. hal always says "me" when referring to his Evil Self, up until the middle of s5 where he starts saying "him."

-> and because (in my opinion) this element was added for a mechanical function, it overwrites thematic ground we've already covered before. when george split his monstrosity off from himself and called the wolf "it," that was a problem he had to overcome; when mitchell tried to deny his own agency and say he wasn't in control when he hurt people, that was a flaw that got corrected. then in hal's case they flip the script and say it really isn't him who does the atrocities. they try to work around it a bit, having good!hal kill someone and feed in secret so he does have things he's responsible for that lead into the change, but it still feels weird.

-> I also get where this comes from, metaphorically. there is a trend in sci fi/fantasy of portraying addict characters with this sort of jekyll-and-hyde dualism, literalizing internal struggles and the way people change while under the influence of mood altering substances, you find shades of it as far back as medieval morality plays where an everyman's vices and virtues manifest into physical form to duke it out. I don't love it, but I see where the emotional core of it comes from, and I also think it works best when (like with jekyll and hyde) the story comes to the conclusion that the two aspects aren't ultimately different people, and that's not really what they do with hal. unless...

-> how different are good hal and bad hal, anyway? obviously their moral codes are different, but are they different people or two aspects of the same person? bad hal isn't a neat freak, but he shares good hal's passion for vintage showtunes and werewolves who visibly want to do him harm. he's genuinely distraught when lady catherine dies, he keeps up appearances with lady mary for 250 years, young leo gets right under his skin, and he was willing to let let tom and alex have a nice send off from him. and, as should probably go without saying, good hal can also be a bastard, too. he almost attacks people several times, he says awful things to tom, he recruits ian and hides it, he kills larry and hides it, he feeds and hides it even when directly asked, etc. if the show had had one more season, I think the obvious next step for this arc would be bad hal joining the gang and everyone realizing that he's still just hal. this isn't a stranger, their friend hasn't died, this is the same man they've been living with for months and he still thinks the lute is the coolest of all medieval stringed instruments. the only real difference is that now he's decided to stop trying, but he's perfectly capable of changing his mind back.

-> what actually is his deal? what, specifically, is the good hal/bad hal thing? other vampires don't do that, other old ones aren't like that, the closest another character comes is herrick's whole amnesia arc but that was because he came back from the dead. I've seen other people go through and track how hal does actually show a good number of symptoms of a dissociative disorder (traumatic early childhood, out-of-body experiences, some amount of amnesia, etc.), but given that he says he feels like "both" and "neither" of himself when the devil tricks them all into thinking they've been un-cursed, I think we're supposed to read it as something supernatural. the best headcanon I've got is it is a dissociative disorder but hal thinks it's supernatural so the devil took it away as part of the whole too-good-to-be-true thing, but I don't think that was the intention and the show leaves it super unclear, they just drop it in and expect us to roll with it.