#to make people motivated to vote to donate to volunteer to everything

[presidentkamala]

Reflecting on some things re proximity to the election

I don't think im being an unhinged doomer when i say that Trump stands a very good chance of winning the election. And i don't even want to say "win" but that he has a clear path to the white house despite everything, but mainly because people mean "my personal checking account" when they say "the economy", and they don't like immigrants or women.

But so does Kamala Harris. And I don't think it makes me a naiive hopium addict to think so. And I see a popular vote victory margin that's high enough to get her over the line in the swing states. I believe this will be the outcome. Im doing everything i can to assure her victory.

I was thinking about the strange calm i feel this time, whereas the last several elections saw me losing weight and hair from the stress, my emotions cycling through anger and betrayal and despair. Part of it is that this cycle was the most active i've ever been in a presidential election. Since kamala's nomination ive volunteered and donated every single week without fail, and it connected me to a LOT of great irl groups and people who understand the stakes and everything we have to lose, and who i know will keep up the good work no matter the outcome for as long as they can.

But I think the other part is that like. Every disappointment and betrayal i could have experienced has sort of already happened? Not to say that i dont think things would get immeasurably worse but like. Every doomsday scenario is being promised by his campaign. HUGE national security blunders and collusion have been made. I think this time i finally accepted and internalized how unamerican MAGAs are, how spoiled and selfish, how short-sighted and greedy and hateful and racist and misogynistic. I stopped coming up with excuses for them. I stopped bemoaning cultural shifts and technological trends. I stopped imagining conversations where i could somehow say the right combination of words to make them see.

They won't see until they are made to see. And even though we could well be entering an unprecedented era for good or for ill, this goes beyond a single presidential race. This is a call to make and effect a cultural shift on the scale of abolition and the civil rights movement, and that's the bigger picture that's motivating me as we move into a likely chaotic period.

Im fired up and excited to vote for kamala. And when she wins Im fired up to take this country back

[yve-e]

Contribution

Anger can be a very powerful motivator. However, it can also be exhausting to maintain for long periods of time, not just mentally and emotionally, but can take a physical toll on the body itself.

At the same time, if we really want to change the world, we need to continue to act. This means that we each need to find a way to contribute on a regular basis to create that change. Over the past week, the focus has been bringing to light the atrocities that those in power inflict upon those they consider powerless, especially how “law enforcement” denigrates, abuses, and murders Blacks. Thousands upon thousands of people all over the world have gathered to protest the status quo, sharing horrific footage of the violence perpetrated by those who are at least nominally supposed to protect us.This has been crucial in bringing attention to the problem.

“Problem.” 

What an inane word to describe the wanton destruction of human lives. Still, it is a problem, and it’s something we need to solve. Making people aware of the situation is only the first step. It’s complicated and has been around for hundreds of years in one form or another. If we are serious about creating sustainable change, we need to approach it from multiple angles.

We need people to continue to show up and protest, speak up and sign petitions.

We need people to continue to share information.

We need people to donate to both national and local organizations to provide legal and social services.

We need people to provide those services.

We need to vote, especially in local elections that most directly impact our lives.

We need people to work to make sure that voting is fair and accessible to all.

We need people to run for public office to represent those who have been ignored or suppressed.

We need people to support those campaigns.

We need people to create stories, music, and art that convey the anguish and heartbreak of the oppressed.

We need people to create stories, music, and art that show us how much better the world could be and inspire us to work towards it. Fiction is a wonderful thing; even pure fantasy can contain Truth and give hope for the future.

We need people to volunteer in their communities, building connections with their neighbors, one human being to another.

We need to seek out and support minority-owned businesses.

We need teachers who can explain things to the next generations so that our children not only expect better but are stong enough to demand it.

We need everyone to have easy and affordable access to healthcare and nourishing food.

We need everyone to have easy, affordable, and non-stigmatizing access to mental health services.

We need so much, and there’s no way any single person can do it all. 

Fortunately, we’re in this together. Find out what calls to your heart, and that can be your contribution to our human tapestry.

The only thing that each of us needs to do is to work on ourselves.

I’m a middlish-class white woman. I grew up in a community that was almost entirely white with a handful of Hispanics. The only black kid I remember in my elementary school was Julie, then in middle school there was Vince. That was it. I only knew TWO black kids until high school. I used to joke that the reason I didn’t grow up prejudiced was because there wasn’t anyone around to be prejudiced against.

At the same time, even though I didn’t have negative assumptions about blacks, I also had NO idea what it was like to be black in the United States. It wasn’t until I was at university that I started to discover that the color of your skin had a huge impact on your world.

I entered UCLA at the tail end of anti-apartheid protests. I thought that racism was something that happened Over There. Then one of my English classes assigned Toni Morrison’s The Bluest Eye and my heart shattered at the horror of a black girl who had so deeply absorbed racist societal standards of “beauty” that she thought that the only way she could ever be considered pretty is if she had blue eyes. Later, I was chatting up this hella cute black guy, talking about how much I loved Johnny Clegg’s music and the way his bands combined Celtic melodies and “tribal rhythms.” With extreme politeness, the guy I was talking with gently informed me that he “found that term offensive.” I was stunned. To me, “tribal” was just a description that, in this case, referred to traditional Zulu music. I didn’t know how to respond, but the incident obviously stayed with me as I thought about it, long and hard.

I’d already been interested in psychology, especially in terms of identity and experience. I ended up majoring in social psychology, curious about how individuals and groups influenced one another. Race became another facet that I sought to understand.

That was 30+ years ago. And you know what? I’m still seeking to understand. Being “woke” isn’t something that happens once where you gain enlightenment and you’re done. It needs to be an active verb, something that you do, throughout your life. I’m still asking myself:

Am I making unfounded assumptions? How can I double-check both my premises and conclusions?

Am I speaking over anyone?

Am I projecting my own experience on someone else and mistaking it for Truth?

If I find myself reacting defensively to something someone else says, what does that mean about me? (Generally, it means that, on some level, my own thoughts, feelings, desires and actions are out of integrity; I need to step back and look at myself to see where I need to up my game and do more to walk my talk.)

How can I improve how I phrase my words to better convey my thoughts in a way that can be heard and understood as I intend them? And is my intention truly in the service of others or, if I’m just seeking validation or to hear myself talk, would it be better to keep silent?

We all have different backgrounds, experiences, gifts, and fears. We have different dreams and different ways of seeing the world. But we’re all human, and we’re all in this together, and while none of us can single-handedly do everything that needs to be done, we can all do something, even if it’s as small as trying to be a little kinder than we need to be.

We can do this.

You have to wash with the crocodile in the river You have to swim with the sharks in the sea You have to live with the crooked politician Trust those things that you can never see Ayeye ayeye jesse mfana (jesse boy) ayeye ayeye

You have to trust your lover when you go away Keep on believing tomorrow will bring a better day Sometimes you will smile while you’re crying inside And just once you’ll turn away while the truth is shining bright Ayeye ayeye Jesse mfana ayeye ayeye

It's a cruel crazy beautiful world Every time you wake up I hope it's under a blue sky It's a cruel crazy beautiful world One day when you wake up I will have to say goodbye Goodbye… It's your world so live in it!

Beyond the door, strange cruel beautiful years lie waiting for you It kills me to know you won't escape loneliness, Maybe you’ll lose hope, too Ayeye ayeye jesse mfana ayeye ayeye

It's a cruel crazy beautiful world Every time you wake up I hope it's under a blue sky It's a cruel crazy beautiful world One day when you wake up I will have to say goodbye Goodbye…. It's your world so live in it!

When I feel your small body close to mine I feel weak and strong at the same time So few years to give you wings to fly Show you the stars to guide your ship by

It's a cruel crazy beautiful world Every time you wake up I hope it's under a blue sky It's a cruel crazy beautiful world One day when you wake up I will have to say goodbye Goodbye….

It's your world so live in it!

Cruel, Crazy, Beautiful World Johnny Clegg

[seluvian]

Boy howdy, I'm reading all kinds of extremely wrong things this week. First of all, race does exist. Even on a scientific level, there are differences between races, just not the ones that we get sold thanks to white supremacy. White supremacy likes to sell us the story that races are inferior to white, less intelligent, more sexual, more docile, more savage. THAT is the lie. But that doesn't mean that all people from all places are exactly alike. Some races trend toward lacking the enzymes to process dairy. Some trend toward certain medical conditions. Some have bigger lung capacity or can see underwater better. This whole 'we're all one race...the HUMAN race' mentality is reductive. Pushing it as the cause of and solution to racism is absurd. Because, yet again, the burden is placed on people of color. What do I mean by that?

My race MATTERS TO ME. I LOVE being black. I am PROUD to be black. I am UNITED with other black people at birth, by virtue of my race. I love the things that make me unique from other races, I'm not ashamed of them. I imagine other people from other races feel the same. But because white people have decided that they should own everything they can, and destroy everything they can't own, I should be stripped of a piece of who I am? I should be ejected from my community? In fact, my community should be destroyed? Eliminated. Because that's the solution? Not, accept people for their differences and stop elevating yourself above others, no, the solution is no one is different, we are all identical and anyone who claims otherwise is a liar.

It's the equivalent of watching a child kick sand at other children in a sandbox, and instead of addressing this with the sand kicking child, your solution is to burn the sandbox. Yes, that...is technically a solution? But now what? You think the child now has understanding and restraint? No. Now the kid is ripping grass out of the ground and making the other children eat it. You didn't solve the problem. The child's behavior needs to be addressed. The sandbox isn't the issue.

It is the nature of the human mind on the most basic level, to categorize. We are literally built to do it. And you know what, that is OKAY. It's when we build a society around uplifting one category and shitting on all others that we run into a problem. Race isn't the issue. The behavior of white people in our white supremacist society is. Do not put the burden on people of color, as if us letting our racial identities dissolve into nothing would stop this problem. It wouldn't. It couldn't.

And the thing is, your fake intellectualism contains so many missteps. Like the bit about statistics. 'Sounds plausible'? Yeah...because it's true. Natural? Maybe it sounds natural to YOU. To me, it's horrifying, infuriating, and motivating the manner in which I vote, donate, and volunteer. And I'm not the only one. But that isn't even the point of statistics like that! The purpose of statistics like that is supposed to be to highlight areas in need of assistance and change. These kinds of statistics are used in the allocation of funds and manpower. How does pretending that there isn't a problem solve that problem, exactly? I'm intensely disturbed by how you keep saying this feels natural. To you, maybe. Racism feels natural? To you, maybe. These horrifying statistics feel natural? To you, maybe. I think maybe you need to examine why you're so comfortable with racism, and why you can't imagine a world without racism, unless you live in a world without race.

I want to talk about one of the greatest luxuries white people enjoy, without even realizing they have this. To never have to think about racism. I'm not saying some white people don't consider their impact or their role in white supremacy. I'm saying that the luxury they have is never being required to think about racism. They don't HAVE to. They don't live with it. It doesn't have a negative effect on their lives. In fact, the racist systems this country is built on actively help white people.

People of color, especially black people, have to think about racism constantly. It's woven into the fabric of our entire lives. Every interaction with white people runs past that filter. And you'd be shocked how much racism we catch that we simply never comment on, at work, at school, even with our friends. I have a lot of white friends. And yes, they do and say racist things, or don't speak against racist things, maintaining the racist status quo with white-serving white silence. And they never have to consider those actions. They never have to consider their impact. What an incredible luxury, to exist in a world where you can decide whether racism exists, or not. What a gift to live free of that heavy burden that so many of us find chained to our backs.

White people can, and should reblog this, just mind yourselves in the notes.

[indivisiblewestla]

HOW TO FLIP A DISTRICT BLUE

Lessons from a Swing District Team that Succeeded in 2016 by Ayana Haviv and Shabbir Imber Safdar

California Away Team’s Shabbir Imber Safdar talked to me about the efforts of his group, in a safely blue district in northern California, to volunteer in nearby swing districts in Sacramento (CA-07) and Reno, NV (battleground, entire state!). We discussed strategies and tactics of the effort.  His team’s post-election analysis is here on medium.com, but here’s the summary:

“During the 2016 election cycle our 40 volunteers made 10 trips to Sacramento and Reno. 3,343 doors knocked on, 44 voters registered, roughly 759 hours of volunteer time given. We won the state of Nevada’s electoral votes for the Democrats, helped elect a new US Senator (Catherine Cortez Masto NV), a member of Congress (Rep. Ami Bera CA-07), and a Nevada state Assembly member by 38 votes (Skip Daly NV-31). We also passed a ballot initiative that closed the background check gun sale loophole in Nevada. Oh, and legal weed was on the ballot and passed in both CA and NV.”

Shabbir’s team is currently in the process of relaunching their project for 2018’s elections, and intends to have a presence in at least 4 locations in CA and NV, as well as start a satellite team on the East Coast.   To answer your question, they are not yet ready for you to volunteer with them, but we are working together and Shabbir’s excited to see lots of other efforts get underway that he doesn’t have to lead.

ACTIONS THAT ARE HELPFUL TO FLIP/KEEP A DISTRICT BLUE:

a) Registering Democratic voters in the district, well ahead of time;

b) Canvassing in the district in the months and weeks before the election;

c) Coordinating with the local Democrats in the district to find the best places to engage in a and b, as well as to help get people to their rallies and other events and to amplify their message; and

d) Donating to and fundraising for the campaign of the Democratic candidate. This blog post will focus on strategies a and b.  Statements directly from Shabbir are in quotes (“”). Everything else is my interpretation of the conversation. 1.       DO IT WITH FRIENDS.

To engage in registering voters and canvassing most effectively, start with a group of friends. Have a core of 4-5 people who are going to commit to multiple weekends. The friend group is important because you want to build camaraderie and make the experience as fun as possible. It’s possible (but not necessary) to coordinate with groups like Sister District Project , Swing Left, and Flippable, but sign up a friend or four to do it with you.

2.       WORK WITH THE LOCAL DEMOCRATS ON THE GROUND.

Call the county Democratic party in the district you want to flip, and/or the precinct captains. You can also work directly with the campaign of the candidate you’re endorsing. Those organizations should provide you with suggested locations to canvass or register voters, voter registration forms, canvassing packets, etc. The local Democratic club or Indivisible group can help you think of great places to register voters or canvass, and could send volunteers to join you.

3.       VALUE YOUR VOLUNTEERS.

Registering voters and canvassing is physically and emotionally draining work, and early volunteer burnout is a real danger. The more fun you can make this activity, and the more efficient you can be with your volunteers’ time, the better. Things that don’t work:

Letting outsiders dictate your group’s volunteer parameters without thinking, “How will this make my volunteers feel?” One example is the Hillary buses in 2016 that spent more time on the road than actually working on the ground in Reno (8 hours travel, 4-6 hours canvassing).   Many that went from SF to Reno burned out after one trip, and told Shabbir they felt poorly utilized.    

As a comparison, Shabbir’s team drove up to Reno, NV Friday night, ate dinner together, had breakfast together on Saturday, canvassed 7-8 hours, had dinner and drinks and relaxed in their suite together.  Then they repeated the same thing on Sunday,  but ending around 4pm to get back to SF at 9pm. It was incredibly hard work, but there’s no doubt they did good work.

“Another thing that didn’t work was once when I brought 2 volunteers to a Congressional race after the campaign staffer told me they would be manning a voter registration table.  I set the volunteers’ expectations for that.  They were excited to register voters.  We got there, and I went out canvassing with the rest of our crew.  I found out the minute I left they got redirected to phone bank and stayed in the office doing that for 6 hours.  That’s kind of a miserable 6 hour job, and they didn’t need to drive 2 hours each way to phone bank.   The volunteers felt bait-and-switched, and I told the campaign staff that I couldn’t yank my volunteers’ expectations around like that, and that if they wanted us to keep coming back (we made 6 trips this cycle) that they had to treat my volunteers better.  It never happened again.”

Things that worked:

Going to Reno for the entire weekend. Arranging hotel blocs to make accommodations easier and keeping people close together (always in a union hotel!).  Renting out a suite together, which is always stocked with food and drinks, for breaks and for get-togethers in the evening. Going out to eat or happy hour every day with the other volunteers, who are based around a group of friends. Talking extensively on social media and in person about the friends who did this and how awesome they are – creating a kind of “in” crowd of cool volunteers – for peer pressure purposes, and to make your volunteers feel special. After all, they are! Celebrating small victories, like getting one voter registration. Making your volunteers feel rewarded at the end of every day of volunteering.

4.       PREPARE. 

Some tried and tested preparation methods: Have a practice canvassing session for anyone who’s new at it before every volunteer day. Do your own 1-page guide on your candidate’s position on all the issues, with possible scandals/red flags that might come up on the back (and arguments to refute), and give to your canvassers as part of their training. 5.       EXPERIMENT. Try voter registrations in new places that are likely to attract many Democrat-leaning voters. Some ideas: synagogues, mosques, gay bars, African-American churches, Section 8 housing, Latin-American markets, marijuana dispensaries. Some of us are planning to register voters in line at Comic-Con in San Diego!  (Shabbir thinks this is brilliant, by the way) “The first time we rolled into Reno in late summer of 2016, the local Democrats informed us that the Republicans were ahead of us by 5,000 registered voters.  I freaked out.   Everyone in Washoe’s Democratic community (staff, volunteers, etc) pulled together to close that gap, but we still went into the election 3,800 registered voters behind. I swore that I would never fail to monitor and participate in that during the off year before the election EVER AGAIN.”

5.       YOU DON’T HAVE TO ACTIVATE PEOPLE ON THE ISSUES YOU CARE ABOUT MOST.

“When we were canvassing in the 2016 election, when we met someone under 30 who seemed like they didn’t care about politics, we led with legal marijuana on the ballot. When there was a tricycle in the driveway, we led with a school bond measure.  Not everyone is motivated by your issue.  You have to speak to people about what’s important to them, not what’s important to you.    A great opener is ‘What is the issue that’s most important for you this election?’ When you get the answer, you can think back to your your 1-pager to talk about where your candidate stands on that issue.   Never use a campaign script, always talk to people in the way that you would like to be spoken to.  Nobody wants to be ‘talked at from a script’.  Campaigns hate that I say that, but once you’ve mastered the art of talking to people where they are comfortable, you can’t lose unless they’re a die-hard opponent, in which case you can wish them a nice day and move on.  Ain’t nobody got time to try and reason with cognitively-biased Republicans.” Good luck forming your team to flip your nearby swing district blue! Keep your eyes on the prize – winning that election.

[fullspectrum-cbd-oil]

With Rallies Halted and Tweets Fact-Checked, Trump Campaign Turns to Smartphone App

 Should President Donald Trump and Twitter ultimately part ways, his campaign has a backup plan at the ready to get his voice out.

Tensions between Trump and the messaging platform escalated last week after Twitter began to label some of his tweets with a fact-check. Trump responded with an executive order that threatens to curtail some legal protections enjoyed by social media companies.

Trump’s campaign has been building an alternative channel for him for months, a smartphone app that aims to become a one-stop news, information and entertainment platform for his supporters, in part because of concerns that the president would lose access to the Twitter platform, said his campaign manager, Brad Parscale.

The Trump app, which was launched in April, has since often placed among the Top 10 in Apple’s rankings of news apps, sometimes above those of individual news organizations such as CNN, the New York Times and Reuters.

“We have always been worried about Twitter and Facebook taking us offline and this serves as a backup,” Parscale told Reuters.

He spoke before Twitter for the first time prompted readers to check the facts in Trump’s tweets last week, warning that his claims about mail-in ballots were false and had been debunked by fact checkers.

For supporters, the new app is where they can get the latest campaign news, watch campaign-produced, prime-time shows hosted by Trump allies and earn reward points for making phone calls or signing people up for the app.

For the campaign, it is a pandemic-proof substitute to Trump’s signature rallies, and a key tool to collect crucial data that can help micro-target voters ahead of November’s election. Trump will face presumptive Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden in the Nov. 3 contest.

With millions of Americans stuck at home and campaign rallies paused due to the coronavirus, successful digital organizing can make a difference, digital strategists in both parties say.

Signing into the app requires a cellphone number, which then allows the campaign to send the user regular text messages lauding Trump or asking for donations.

“The most important, golden thing in politics is a cellphone number,” said Parscale, who ran Trump’s digital efforts in 2016 before leading the 2020 campaign. “When we receive cellphone numbers, it really allows us to identify them across the databases. Who are they, voting history, everything.”

Reward points that users can earn by getting other people to sign up for the app can be used to buy campaign gear or even score a meeting with Trump himself, the campaign said.

‘DIGITAL MOUSETRAP’

Biden’s campaign has a phone app as well, where supporters can donate or volunteer, and text people directly with campaign messaging.

But unlike Trump’s app, it provides little information, such as social media streams or news releases. Nor does it connect to the virtual campaign events Biden has been holding nearly daily during the coronavirus pandemic. The app is not ranked by Apple as among its 200 most popular for news.

The Biden campaign said it uses its app almost solely for organizing supporters, not for pushing content.

By contrast, according to Stefan Smith, a Democratic digital strategist who worked for Pete Buttigieg’s 2020 presidential campaign, the Trump app has created a “walled garden” or “digital mousetrap” where voters ideally stay as long as possible, interacting with the app’s steady stream of content.

“The Trump campaign is a media company with an electoral component,” Smith said.

The Trump campaign hired Texas-based company Phunware <PHUN.O> to build the app.

If they so choose, users can rely on the app as a primary, if heavily filtered, information source, one where Trump’s handling of the COVID-19 pandemic is championed and the economy is poised for a quick recovery and the federal probe into Trump’s collusion with Russia was a politically motivated hoax.

Not included is less favorable coverage of the president. On Monday, the app contained a campaign statement framed like a news article that said Trump had been working to unite the county in the wake of nationwide protests over the police shooting of George Floyd in Minneapolis.

There was no mention of a combative conference call Trump had with U.S. governors in which he urged them to act more aggressively toward the protesters.

Bill Bigby, a Trump supporter in Scranton, Pennsylvania, said the app has now become his go-to source for the latest news.

“We have learned that you can’t trust anything the media says about Trump,” Bigby, 56, said. “They just don’t like him.”

Parscale said that was exactly the goal the campaign had in mind.

“I think everything we do is to counter the media,” Parscale said. “This is another tool in the tool shed to fight that fight, and it’s a big tool.”

(Editing by Soyoung Kim and Tom Brown)

from IJR https://ift.tt/3dvcfPF via IFTTT

[librarieseverywhere]

on remembering

i wish i remembered to write down everything, like how Clem gets so comfortable in my lap sometimes that she rolls off, or how the shower smells so good right when you first turn the water on here. It’s probably one of the best showers we’ll ever have. 

Clem has diabetes, and it’s been hard. We’re still trying to get the insulin dose right, and the timing. She eats the food, now, and that is good. she’s put on a little weight, but she seems tired. I look at her and wonder if she’s older than we’ve thought. 

What are cats for, if not for noticing? if not for slowing down time and bringing you into the present moment? But how often do I sit with the cat purring in my lap, while I stare at my phone, scrolling through instagram. Still, she ties me to here. 

Like last summer, when B was out of town, and it was hot and sticky and I didn’t feel very good, and after I swam my laps at the pool, I came and laid on the couch and watched the week’s worth of Colbert episodes and Clem lay across me, and next to me for the whole time. 

Or the morning where she smashed into the window trying to get a bird, and jumped up, clinging to the window ledge, smashing a picture frame in the process. 

How about how every single morning she jumps up on to the bed with a little squeak and starts to nudge me awake? the sound of her footsteps on the stairs? the way she watches the birds out the back door, tail twitching? I want to soak it all in. I wish I recorded every moment, because while now it seems long, it won’t be. Someday, we’ll come to a day, when Clem is only in our memories. Now, when I think about the next 10 years, they loom large, but if I haven’t learned yet, they go, and soon you will be through them, on the other side. We forget to look back, only to the next 10 years from there. 

I’m only taking it a day at a time now, wishing more than anything to be on the other side of this. Still, it is my life. 10 weeks have passed this way. My trip is a distant memory. 

I thought of other things to record, and then i forgot, my mind jumps around so much, I’m always so scattered, I rarely follow through. I’m not so motivated when it comes to work or creativity - another form of work. I seek adventures and social outlets. I distract myself with pleasure. 

Though I love my work, and if I can get myself to dig in, my head swims with ideas that I can’t write down fast enough. The same with creativity - I have ideas. It’s not all crazy when I jealously stalk the journalists on Twitter- a part of me really believes I could do it. But I just don’t have the drive. 

I’ve been thinking about time, too, here, because what has been such a scary, stressful, grievous time in my short life, will surely be just a blip in the history books later. We won’t remember. The world will forget us, those who were not here will not care. 

I’ve never thought much about what it might have been like to live through the Depression or WWII. 

Why would anyone care that I couldn’t leave my house for 10 weeks? That we questioned everything - maybe some of us for the first time ?

We found out today that we’re moving - we’re excited, but as always, i’m sad, too. The house was good to us. It’s too good for us, hence the problem. The apartment will be “right-sized” and for that, we should be excited. a place we can afford on our own. 

sometimes, i forget to miss my life, to grieve, to pray, to hold a moment for those who are suffering the most, and for the life that could have been. sometimes, i’m consumed by it.

It’s memorial day weekend, but i won’t be wearing my vacation dress and setting off to camp. the energy isn’t there, not this year, because we have a stay at home order. my favorite holiday of the year. i’ve let it go. i’m not too sad about it. i’ve let is all go and just pray for a future where this isn’t a problem anymore. 

i’m supposed to pray for not going back to normal, but so much of what i want is monday night yoga and memorial day in virginia. I want my life from the last few years to be frozen in place, for no one to go anywhere. I want to tell these past years, “thank you” For Clem, for Andrea, for NYAPC, for Ellen, for Chris and Meredith, Gayle and Richard, the Pub and the People. Thank you for the vacation dress and Eckington and Mexico and Argentina. Thank you for live music and cook outs and healthy bodies. 

So clearly, I see now - I had everythign I ever wanted. My life was going up - my career was finetuning, my community was gathering, my dreams were there - lurking in the way i lived. 

we rush, even now, and i don’t sit with my thoughts. i don’t remember the tragedy around me. i get distracted and worried and agitated - about clem’s diabetes and money and moving and work and not working enough and being bored. 

I don’t write everything down - i had a poetic thought earlier that I wanted to write, poignantly, just drop it into a post and leave it. I forgot it, my mind now skimming frantically over the day. 

Something below the surface feels not quite right - and I’ll forget that nothing is quite right - that I should be wakng up on a schedule and riding my bike to Dupont and then coming home, maybe pretty tired, maybe sweaty, maybe with a million things to do, maybe after stopping for yoga or a play at woolly mammoth, or just a drink with a friend. 

those things seem impossible now, and they are. my days now are only tied to the time of the insulin injections - 8:15a and 8:15p. When would i go to dnner with friends? maybe we’ll live like this forever, after all. 

the world is still there, that’s what’s so strange. you can still call front royal canoe and make a reservation. you can take a walk and realize that all these other people are going to work, at the hardware store, the drug store, the Target, the Harris Teeter. They’re doing construction or rescheduling appointments at the dentist’s office. 

The deeper we get into this , the more we see how much we really can let go of, how little we need, how much we can detach. Another world is possible, indeed. They’ve gutted mine. Essential services are Netflix, FedEx, and Amazon. It’s uncanny. If I were the paranoid type, I might truly believe I was just a character in someone’s play brimming with sympolism and cultural critique. 

I got my teeth cleaned yesterday. Tomorrow I’ll vote, go for a run. The weekend stretches before us, tied only with the 8-8 rhythm. We’ll take the cat back to the vet Tuesday only to sit down to a condensed week. In a normal life, I might’ve taken Tuesday off - carpe diem! - salute the summer, and all that would have laid before me. 

I’m losing steam here, but I mind doesn’t feel done. like i’ve got so much more. I do. I need to pray - to say thank you and I’m sorry. I need to remember what sacredness is, to recite beloved poems and words, to hear them reverberate in me. Prayer, I know, is what makes me a more understanding, deeper person. Ocean Vuyong said something to the effect of what i always think - just going for a walk is my prayer - and so i say now - my rage, my sorrow, my joy, my anxiety, these are all my prayers. when i notice the trees, when i smile at my beloved cat, when i see a friend, when i hear a siren, when i wail with anger at the unfathomable circumstances we find ourselves in - these are my prayers - these are the moments of my life .There are only sacred and desacrated places. 

God, we are all you. You are in every detail, in all creatures, in every moment. Help me to slow down, to notice. That’s what love is. 

God, help me. Be with us - let this thing end. 

My work, too, gets in my head, and i think - shouldn’t i be learning more? doing more? becoming an expert in something? picking up a craft? demonstrating my creative side? prepping for a marathon? mostly i eat, but we’ve gotten tired of cooking. I read some, but we watch tv more. i shower when i don’t need to and i order things online that ship to my house. we complain and we fight. we’re here alone, without Ellen, and we miss her. We’ll miss this big old house. what we had was so fleeting, but it was good. 

I feel like my time has not been enough. like i should have done more. at least for work - learning more, trying more, building more, doing PD, and reading all the articles. i can barely see one day ahead. 

still i build in so much crap into my life - i keep busy and i forget to call my mother. i think about moving and vacation and gardens and take out food. I think about my 5 year plan and what i should do with my furlough time and what my research interests are and if i should apply for my PhD, now, and do it remote? would that be worth it? also, how do you make virtual experiences worth it? I should be trying to do interesting teaching strategies. 

I think about Clem and cat diabetes and new make up tips because I look at the internet too much. I wonder if my hair is getting uglier (it is) and if i should volunteer/help/donate money/send notes. i try to be good, but sometmes i forget to try, and then i just stare at my computer screen, flicking between twitter and email and blogs and maybe halfheartedly thinking about work, but at least i should have gotten up if i wasnt going to do any work. and then we watch tv. sometimes that’s all it is. sometimes i do online yoga or we skype a friend. sometimes we take a walk, but there’s nowhere to go. sometimes there are so many after work hours but i don’t call anyone or read my book or anything. sometimes, we go to bed and wake up late the next day. 

i should :

do my geography /sociology degree

a library degree

my Jon Batiste collage

learn to sing and play the banjo

read dozens of books and journal what i learn, really hold them in my heart

pray and pray and pray and contemplate and remember Roger and remember the Zapatistas and remember that my spirituality makes me more interesting, that my soul craves that connection in it’s core, that my love for NYAPC is huge, the place where 9th graders learn that God has no gender and that creation care is a critical part of being Christian. That politics are informed by our faith and that’s why we march and feed the hungry and demand clean air and clean water and a habitable future. 

i’m rambling. i’m hungry. so is clem. i’m sad we’re moving but happy to find another place i’m worried about money but we have plenty. i’m tired but don’t know what i’d do anymore anyway, or how to begin again. 

but maybe this, to vow again, to write, to pray, to contemplate, to share, to record. days and times and habits, they slip away and we don’t notice. 

like when i used to try and make smoothies - that was for a few years, but i don’t do that anymore. or when we used to eat bread and olive oil, like we did in spain, but somehow we stopped. nothing actually is constant - you learn that. i’m 33 and i remember being 23 both like it was yesterday and like that probably wasnt even me, just a movie i watched. i’m nostalgic for yesterday and 10 years ago and i wouldn’t change a thing and i wish i could try something totally different. it’s a mess, this whole thing, and i should at least make something beaiutiful out of it. like Mary Oliver, who knew to be joy and light anyway. 

[investmart007]

ALPINE, Calif. | Even under indictment, California congressman is favorite

New Post has been published on https://is.gd/R33Mdi

ALPINE, Calif. | Even under indictment, California congressman is favorite

ALPINE, Calif.— The indictment of U.S. Rep. Duncan Hunter and his wife that alleges they illegally converted his campaign account into a household checkbook reorders his re-election contest, giving Democrats a suddenly stronger hand in a district that for decades has embraced Republican candidates.

But even with charges shadowing him, it will be an upset if Hunter loses.

Two months ago Hunter coasted through the June primary despite the ongoing FBI investigation that produced the 60-count indictment. His 30-point, first-place finish made him a strong favorite to win a sixth term in November.

The 50th Congressional District east of San Diego is the most Republican in Southern California. The party holds a nearly 15-point registration edge over Democrats, and President Donald Trump won the district by the same margin while losing statewide by more than 4 million votes in 2016.

The Hunter name is something of a political dynasty in the area — his father was elected to the seat in 1980 and held it until his son won in 2008. Hunter’s Democratic opponent, Ammar Campa-Najjar, 29, has never held elective office. He won just over 17 percent of the votes in June but that was good enough for second place in the state’s primary where the top-two vote-getters advance to the general election regardless of party.

A day after Hunter and his wife were charged with looting his campaign funds to finance family vacations, boozy restaurant binges and shopping sprees, voters in Hunter’s rural hometown of Alpine were sharply divided on what it all means. Some are shocked, some outraged, and some are rising to defend Hunter and his claim of being pursued by politically motivated prosecutors eager to see one of Trump’s early supporters in Congress fall.

Sandy Hintz, 75, said she has supported Hunter in the past but needs more information before making up her mind about him in November.

“I was really shocked, wow. How could that happen?” she asked. “He had seemed like a good guy.”

Chris Wilmot, 47, a Republican and longtime Hunter supporter, said he was rethinking the race. To Wilmot, Hunter “has talked like a politician,” and the certified public accountant has been put off by “the way he dresses, and his ego.”

“I wonder what else they will get on him,” Wilmot said outside a coffee shop near the town’s business strip, where pickup trucks rolled by feed stores, diners and gun shops.

Austin Bodger, 21, who works in a feed store, said he intends to vote for Campa-Najjar but acknowledged the candidate faces an uphill fight.

In the rural district with a large military presence “there are a lot of conservative Republicans who vote only Republican,” Bodger said. “A lot of people don’t think the charges are real. They think they are trumped up to take him down.”

The district is near Camp Pendleton, the largest Marine base in the West, and has many active duty and retired military who feel a kinship with Hunter, a Marine who saw combat in Iraq and Afghanistan, and his father, an Army Ranger who won the Bronze star during the Vietnam War.

In an interview with The Associated Press in San Diego, Campa-Najjar said he was hopeful of breaking the Hunter family’s nearly 40-year hold on the district. He said his message of affordable health care and college would cut across party lines.

“If we are a nation of laws, then you cannot in good conscience vote for Duncan Hunter,” he said.

Prior to the indictment, Hunter’s race was not among the top targets for Democrats in California, a state where the party hopes to flip a series of GOP-held seats this year as part of a strategy to seize the House.

In a televised interview Wednesday, Hunter, 41, said he’s not worried about the indictment and is eager to go to trial. He referred to the U.S. Justice Department as “the Democrats’ arm of law enforcement” and said the FBI and the department are “a politically motivated group of folks.”

“This is modern politics and modern media mixed in with law enforcement that has a political agenda. That’s the new Department of Justice,” he told KGTV in San Diego.

California is a Democratic bastion, where the party controls every statewide office and both chambers of the Legislature. Republican registration in the state has been dipping for years.

Hunter’s district has been changing demographically, but it remains something of a holdout, where Republicans remain politically powerful.

The indictment “has changed everything,” said Republican John Dadian, a lobbyist and consultant long involved in area politics, though he still gives Hunter an edge based on the district’s generous GOP registration numbers.

The charges have brought new attention to Campa-Najjar, a former Obama administration Labor Department official whose father is a Palestinian Muslim and mother a Mexican Catholic. He was born in San Diego County but spent part of his childhood in Gaza.

Massachusetts Sen. Elizabeth Warren, a Democrat and potential 2020 presidential contender, used Twitter on Tuesday to urge her supporters to donate to his campaign. Joe Trippi, a Democratic strategist working for Campa-Najjar, said the campaign has seen a spike in fundraising and volunteers.

Speaking with reporters in San Francisco, House Democratic leader Nancy Pelosi called Campa-Najjar a great candidate but was noncommittal about diverting party funds to a district whose voters still “may decide their desire for a tax cut overcomes everything else.”

Hunter and his wife were charged by a federal grand jury with using more than $250,000 in campaign funds to finance family trips to Italy and Hawaii, golf outings, school tuition, theater tickets — even fast food purchases — and attempting to conceal the illegal spending in federal records.

The indictment depicts a couple freely dipping into campaign cash for years to bankroll their personal lifestyle, while their household budget was awash in red ink. The spending ranged from the banal to the lavish, from movie tickets to a $6,288.74 family vacation at a resort in Lahaina, Hawaii.

House Speaker Paul Ryan called the charges “deeply serious” and said Hunter will be removed from his committee assignments.

Nick Kriticos, a retired salesman from El Cajon who has volunteered for the Campa-Najjar campaign, said he doesn’t see Democrats flipping the district, even with Hunter’s legal trouble.

“It’s still very much Trump country here,” he said.

By MICHAEL R. BLOOD and JULIE WATSON , Associated Press

[duaneodavila]

Matthew Charles And The Crack

It seem beyond absurd in retrospect that Matthew Charles has to return to prison. His story is the rare one where reason and emotion align.

Since his release in 2016, Charles has held a steady job. He volunteers every Saturday, has reconnected with his family, and started a serious relationship. But really, his rehabilitation started years prior.

In prison, he took college classes and correspondence courses, he taught a GED program and became a law clerk. With his training, he helped other incarcerated men understand the judicial system long after their public defenders moved on to the next case.

Charles kept the secrets of those who were illiterate so they wouldn’t face ridicule or harassment — he read them letters from the court and drafted filings for them in the library. He organized bible studies and counseled newcomers. Two decades in federal insitututions — from maximum to low security — without a single disciplinary infraction.

He was the success story, both within and without. Charles was what the system aspired to produce. Charles was a success story of a system that produced mostly failure. So what does the system do with him?

He’s going to prison. To finish out a 35-year term for selling crack to an informant in the 90’s.

Charles had already served 21 years before his sentence was cut short as a result of crack guideline changes passed by the Obama administration. But the U.S. Attorney’s office appealed his release on the grounds that Charles was legally considered a “career offender” due to a prior stint in state prison. They said the retroactive change in the law did not apply to him — and a Court of Appeals agreed.

Way back when everyone, of every political persuasion, was certain that crack was the devil, some inexplicably horrible superdrug that would destroy humanity, the United States Sentencing Commission chose to punish it’s distribution at a rate of 100 to 1 compared with powdered cocaine. And if the Sentencing Commission said so, it had to be true, because they were empirical and beyond reproach. Crack was an epidemic, and something must be done! Everyone agreed.

So Matthew Charles was sentenced to 35 years in prison. It was an absurdly long sentence, but other than criminal defense lawyers, no one cared. The conservatives were all about law and order, and Bill Clinton was even more about law and order to prove he could be even more Draconian than the other team. It was easy at the time, as everyone still believed that drugs, particularly crack, was the ruin of society.

After decades of lobbying, arguing, and a change in societal hysteria from crack to terrorists, the highly-scientific Sentencing Commission relented. Somewhat. They reduced the relative punishment for crack down to 17 to 1. Still nonsensical, since the justification would have required a straight one to one comparison, and because the sentences for powdered cocaine were already ridiculously severe. But it was better than before, even if still irrationally severe. At least there was finally a crack through which there was some hope of relief.

And they did one thing more that was extremely controversial: they made it retroactive, which Congress embodied in the Fair Sentencing Act of 2010.

On June 30, 2011 the Commission voted to give retroactive effect to the proposed permanent guideline amendment. The effective date of this retroactive effect and changes to §1B1.10 (Reduction in Term of Imprisonment as a Result of Amended Guideline Range), the policy statement governing retroactivity, was November 1, 2011.

But like all acts of governmental benevolence, it came with caveats, one of which was that it wasn’t available to “career offenders.” Charles had a prior. We remain tied to the fantasy of the virgin non-violent prisoner, some poor fellow who made one mistake for which he’ll pay forever. But two mistakes? Three? Screw him. Life plus cancer for the proven recidivist. But when he looks like Matthew Charles, he suddenly doesn’t look quite so scary and evil.

The Sentencing Commission could have made the reduction automatic, but decided that would make it too easy. Instead, it required that prisoner’s apply for it, and apply they did. En masse. For reasons that are unclear, Charles’ application made it through, even though it shouldn’t have given his prior. And so he was released.

But, over the past two years, Charles built a new life — he bought clothing, furniture, a cell phone, a car. He rented a room in East Nashville. There are frames with new pictures and smiling faces on the nightstand next to his bed.

Over the next few weeks, Charles donates everything he can. He returns his SUV to the dealer and gives the house key back to his landlord.

It’s hard not to be released. It’s torturous to be released and then ordered to return to prison. But why did the United States Attorney appeal? What about discretion? Why couldn’t they just turn their heads and look somewhere else, and let Charles’ case slide? After all, it was clear that this guy didn’t need to go back to prison. This guy wasn’t going back to selling drugs. This was the success story guy. Couldn’t they just let this one, this one guy, go?

It’s unlikely that we’ll ever know the real motivation for the decision to put Charles back in prison. Maybe it’s concern that soft judges will fudge the criteria for others if they let this one go? Maybe it’s because of fear that if he commits some heinous crime, the mob will blame the government for being too kind? Maybe they’re just being harsh, true believers in the evils of drugs? Regardless, there’s every incentive to strictly enforce the law.

But Matthew Charles’ story is just one of many, and prisons are full of people serving absurdly long sentences with the blessing of the hysterical mob of the day. Sure, he’s going back now because of the prosecution’s decision not to cut him a break, but his sentence of 35 years was because the public loved its government’s harshness against those it deemed too horrible to deserve anything less. We’re no less true believers today. We’ve just shifted our focus away from crack and guys like Matthew Charles to the devils du jour.

Copyright © 2007-2018 Simple Justice NY, LLC This feed is for personal, non-commercial and Newstex use only. The use of this feed anywhere else violates copyright. If this content is not in your news reader, it means the page you are viewing infringes copyright. (Digital Fingerprint: 51981395c77d7762065ca2c084b63e47) Matthew Charles And The Crack republished via Simple Justice

[seanbsworld]

A Short Scene: “Meat”

Setting:      A dining room, somewhat fancy.

Characters:   George – A man in his 50’s. Charming without depth.

                      Alexis – A woman in her 30’s. A genuine flake.

Tone:         Absurdist, ironic, melodramatic, dark.

Dialogue:     Rhythmic and repetitive like a pop song or echo chamber.

At Rise:      George and Alexis sit at a dinner table facing each other. The table is set, but the food has not been served yet. They drink wine and talk.

Alexis: It’s just awful.

George: Yes. It is.

Alexis: I mean...

George: I know, I know. It’s, it’s--

Alexis: It’s awful!

George: Well, yes, but--

Alexis: I mean, the look on his face, and that poor girl, and all the blood...

George: Horrific.

Alexis: It’s just... the worst.

George: Yes, but what can you do? What can you do?

Alexis: I don’t know. Does anyone know? I mean--

George: What can you do? I feel helpless. Somewhat.

Alexis: Me too. So helpless. They need to change the gun laws.

George: Yes. Absolutely. If there ever was a time--

Alexis: I mean those images are seared into my brain. That poor girl, all that blood, and their families... I just can’t.

George: The whole town must be devastated.

Alexis: The whole country! And they showed it on TV. I can’t believe they showed it on TV. Not even cable! Regular TV.

George: I had to look away, briefly.

Alexis: It’s just...

A long pause.

Alexis: ... unspeakable.

George: If there ever was a time when we could all agree about the gun laws--

Alexis: It couldn’t be clearer... I don’t even watch the news anymore. It’s too depressing. I mean, what’s happening to this country?

George: Well, the media makes it seem worse than it actually is. This is still the greatest country in the world. It’s the media and all the little snowflakes that are--

Alexis: Oh, I know! They act like the world is burning.

George: They don’t realize how good they have it. This is still the greatest country. I mean, if this was China...

Alexis: Seriously.

George: It’s their right to protest and march, I understand that, but give it a rest. Do they really think they’re going to change anything? What’re they thinking?

Alexis: Seriously, if this was China or Russia... And they’re so entitled.

George: Yes! They expect everything to just be handed to them. Where did they learn that behavior? Why do they act like that? I mean, I used to be like that, back in college, but come on, right?

Alexis: Well... they’re probably just reacting to what the previous generation stood for. They’re cynics laced with optimism. Their irony is sincere...

George: (slightly annoyed) Wow. How perceptive...

Alexis: Full disclosure: I’m technically a snowflake, but--

George: Ah. That explains so much.

Alexis: (playfully) No it doesn’t, shut up! But, admittedly, it’s difficult to defend us sometimes. I’ve had to unfollow so many friends off Facebook. Just so much negativity. I’m over it... so when’s dinner going to be ready? I’m famished.

George: Soon, soon. You’re going to love it. Oh, speaking of famines, have you heard in Africa--

Alexis: George! How can you be so glib?

George: (laughing) What, what? I’m creating ironic distance. It’s the only way I can process what’s happening there. It’s really tragic.

Alexis: You’re such a--

George: What?

Alexis: (flirtatiously) You’re so bad.

George: I know, I know. I’m the worst! But the situation in, uh, uh--

Alexis: Africa.

George: Right. The situation really has become dire. I mean, millions of, of--

Alexis: Africans.

George: People! These poor people, and children, on the brink of starvation. They’re like skeletons, walking around, eyes bulging out, flies eating their skin... It’s staggering the lack of motivation among the world’s governments to provide aid. Why don’t we help out? Why don’t we do more?

Alexis: I know.

George: I mean, if we all just got together and focused... But we don’t have any real leaders. Where are they? Where are the leaders?

Alexis: I don’t know.

George: There’s too many problems in the world. It’s--

Alexis: Overwhelming.

George: Not overwhelming. It’s just... you know?

Alexis: It’s like standing in an elevator full of people and not knowing who smells bad.

George: Uh, well--

Alexis: We really need to do more, though. I feel so bad when I throw out food. But at least we’re not like ancient Rome. They would stuff themselves silly then throw it all up just so they could eat more.

George: Actually, that’s not true. The Romans never binged and purged.

Alexis: Yes they did. They had “vomitoriums”.

George: That’s a common misperception. “Vomitoriums” were large passages that allowed amphitheater crowds to exit quickly, sort of spewing them out.

Alexis: Oh. I feel so stupid. This whole time I thought, because of the name--

George: It’s okay to be wrong, Alexis. People make that mistake all the time.

Alexis: (defensively) I know it’s okay to be wrong, George--

George: Okay, okay, relax--

Alexis: I’m just explaining, because of the name.

George: Your generation is so sensitive.

Alexis: No we’re not, shut up! Just because I’m explaining myself doesn’t mean--

George: Bunch of little snowflakes...

Alexis: You better watch yourself mister. Charm will only get you so far.

George: I’ll be careful.

Alexis: (playfully) Seriously, I’ll organize a march so fast... You know, we may not even have snow for much longer, the world the way it is. They say fifteen of the hottest years on record have occurred since the millennium. Can you believe that?

George: (sincerely) I know, I know. They say we’re already past the point of no return. Even if everyone went green tomorrow, we’re still screwed. The sea levels will rise. Florida will be underwater in a hundred years. Florida!

Alexis: I can’t believe it. No more Miami Beach. No more palm trees...

George: Actually, palms aren’t trees at all. It’s technically grass.

Alexis: (very annoyed) Another “common misperception”, I guess... Is dinner ready yet?

George: I’ll go check.

Alexis: Good idea.

George leaves.

Alexis stands up and walks to the other side of the table. She smells the chair where George was sitting, taking in big whiffs. Then she clears her throat loudly before returning to her seat.

George returns. He sits down.

Alexis: (flustered) Is it ready yet, dinner? I feel like I’ve been waiting forever.

George: It’s cooling, just a few more minutes. As they say, “Patience is a cliché”...

Alexis: What?

George: Nothing... Are you okay?

Alexis: (readjusting) Of course. Yes. Just hungry... So, are you going to tell me what’s for dinner? You’re being so mysterious.

George: You’re going to love it. It’s a delicacy, very hard to come by these days. But it does have...

Alexis: What?

George: It has meat in it.

Alexis: George... you know I’m a vegan.

George: Just hear me out.

Alexis: You know I’m a vegan, George.

George: You said you were a “practical vegan”.

Alexis: But I’ve been really bad lately. I’m trying to get back on the wagon. I really shouldn’t.

George: This is a delicacy, very hard to come by. And with the world the way it is, who knows if I can even get more of it.

Alexis: You make it sound like it’s endangered.

George: No, in fact, it’s overpopulated. It’s just the world, the way it is--

Alexis: I can’t. Eating meat is wrong and it really isn’t healthy. The leading killer in the country is heart disease. I mean, the idea of eating flesh? Eating a thing that once had a heartbeat?

George: Plants are alive. Everything we eat was once alive. If you want to survive, you have to kill... Just try a little bit, a tiny nibble. The meat is fair trade, free range, no chemicals, completely organic--

Alexis: Non-GMO?

George: All that shit. Just try a little bit.

Alexis: You’re such a bad influence, George.

George: Don’t pretend like you don’t like it.

Alexis: I can’t eat meat, I’m sorry. I hate disappointing you, but I have to commit to something. It’s not just my health--factory farms have a huge environmental impact as well. All the water the animals require and all the, you know, excrement they produce...

George: Are you not going to eat?

Alexis: I’m not going to eat the meat.

George: But the meat is the meal. If you don’t want to eat the meat, you may as well not eat at all.

Alexis: Fine. I won’t eat then.

George: Why are you acting like this?

Alexis: Why are you asking me to compromise my beliefs?

George: Your beliefs are based on practicality.

Alexis: George, I have to commit to something, otherwise I’ll never figure stuff out.

George: You have to commit tonight?

Alexis: If I don’t, I’ll just keep on, untethered, drifting off into the ether.

George: Oh my God--you really are a little snowflake, aren’t you?

Alexis: (very annoyed) What’s the big fucking deal, George?

A pause. The tension makes George laugh.

George: Come on, are you really not going to eat?

Alexis: You knew I was a vegan.

George: Honestly, I thought you were just telling people that to feel superior.

Alexis: Is that how you think of me?

George: I do it, too. Everyone does. I mean, who really gives a shit about Africa?

Alexis: I’m a good person. I care about things.

George: I know.

Alexis: I volunteer. I donate. I didn’t vote in the last election because, obviously, but other things...

George: I know, I know. Look, Alexis, you’re a great person. You inspire me. Truly. I just think you’ll really enjoy this meat. It’s a delicacy. This opportunity doesn’t comes around every day.

Alexis: I want to eat the meal, but I don’t want the meat.

George: It’s pointless without the meat. It’s like not fucking on Prom night.

Alexis: That’s a little aggressive.

George: Does that frighten you, aggression?

Alexis: When it’s sitting across the table.

George laughs.

A pause.

George: Alexis, you’re not a bad person if you eat a little meat. Honestly, it would be wasteful if you didn’t eat. It’s already cooked.

Alexis: No, George.

George: Alright. If that’s your decision, I respect that... A little misguided, but still respectable... I think you’ll regret it later, but I respect it...

Alexis: Just curious, um, what kind of meat is it? I mean, if it’s so amazing.

George: No, no, you’re committed to changing the world. I can’t possibly divulge--

Alexis: Oh, come on. What is it? Don’t tease me, George.

George: No, no, you have beliefs. I’m not going to ask you to compromise yourself.

Alexis: George, don’t tease me. Please, please, please, please tell me. What kind of delicacy...

George responds with body language and facial gestures.

Alexis: Is it... George, is it what I think it is?

George gestures again.

Alexis: Is it what I think it is, George? Huh Georgie? Please tell me. Is it...

George gestures again.

Alexis: It is? George, really!? No! Holy fuck! How did you, where did you--

George: It wasn’t easy, the world the way it is.

Alexis: Wow, I wasn’t expecting that. Have you cooked it before? What does it taste like?

George: The natives say it’s best rare, all the nutrients and antioxidants get burned up if you cook it too long. Also, we have to eat it with our hands.

Alexis: Is that a thing?

George: Yes, it’s a thing... Just try a little bit. If you don’t like it, just get drunk and watch me eat...

Alexis: Maybe a bite or two, just to say I’ve tried it...

George: Is that a yes?

Alexis: Are you sure it was ethically-sourced?

George: That’s what the guy said.

George checks his watch.

George: I’ll go grab it. Wait, before you decide...

George leaves.

Alexis stands up again. She stretches and loosens up her body and neck. She cracks her knuckles and loudly clears her throat again. Then she sits back down.

George returns with a plate of indistinguishable meat. He places it in the middle of the table. He grabs a carving knife.

George: Shall I cut you a slice?

Alexis: It does smell good.

George: I’ll cut you a slice.

Alexis: I didn’t say yes.

George: I’ll cut you a slice, just in case.

George carves up the meat. It is extremely bloody and splashes on the table. He puts a slice on two plates. He takes one to Alexis then returns to his chair with the other plate.

George digs in. He eats with his hands and moans with pleasure.

George: Wow, oh, wow, so fucking good!

Alexis: Relax, George.

George: You have to try this. Oh my God, wow! Seriously, you have to fucking try this.

Alexis: It can’t be that good.

George: So many interesting textures. Fibrous, yet tender, like a mango. Fuck, damn, wow!

Alexis: (embarrassed) You’re acting like you’re about to come.

George: Oh Alexis, if only you knew...

Alexis inspects the meat a little closer. She smells it.

Alexis: Well, I wouldn’t want to waste food. And the world, the way it is...

George: You won’t regret it.

George is nearly finished with his slice. He’s dripping with blood.

Alexis: Eating meat is still wrong. I’m not admitting to anything...

Alexis eats the meat. George attempts to wipe the blood off with a napkin.

Alexis: Jesus Christ! It’s so fucking good! Wow, I wasn’t, that’s unexpected.

She continues to eat, becoming more and more sloppy and piggish. Blood runs from her mouth down her throat.

George becomes distracted by her appetite.

George: (shocked) Christ, Jesus, you don’t have to eat so fast. Take a breath...

Alexis: Oh! So juicy...

Alexis continues to devour the meat, splashing blood everywhere.

George: (disgusted) That’s not very attractive. Maybe try a napkin...

Alexis eats and eats. When she’s done, she licks her plate clean. She’s covered in blood.

A pause.

Both characters examine the table, all the blood, and then each other.

Alexis: I’m a mess.

George: It’s hard to look at you, to be honest.

Alexis: So full, so unsatisfied. I want more, but I’m so full... but I want more...

George: Well... you know what we could do?

George gestures. Alexis responds with curious approval.

George: I’ll get the Ipecac.

 End scene.

[fluentlanguage]

9 of the Best Resources for Learning Spanish Online

Finding credible resources for language learning can be difficult and time-consuming, but don't worry...I'm here to help! Welcome to a new blog series called 9 Best Resources. Every month, I'll bring you trusted and reliable apps, courses, books and more.

The series kicks off with one of the most popular languages among learners everywhere: Español! 🇪🇸💃🏾🇲🇽🇦🇷

In a Hurry? Get These By Email!

I've put all of my top Spanish resources plus 5 more indie tips into a handy PDF page so you can access everything from one page. Get it for free by singing up to the Fluent Cool Kids Club, my huge online library full of awesome bonus content.

Insider Info Comin' Right Up..

Here at Fluent Language, I love supporting independent language producers. So my indie Top 9 means that these resources are not part of a big corporation or brand of language businesses. They're insider tips that you might have not discovered otherwise.

There has never been a better time to learn Spanish, and with these 9 indie resources you'll be using the language comfortably in no time.

1. Fluent Spanish Academy

My friend Olly Richards is fluent in a whole bunch of languages, but I'm never more impressed than when he speaks Spanish. ¡Que sexy! Olly knows what it takes to become confident, and he knows that being stuck on "intermediate" can be frustrating.

He runs Fluent Spanish Academy, a programme designed to guide you through the plateau and into language fluency. His programme includes:

Live training and weekly audio Spanish lessons to take with you wherever you want

Real recordings of conversations between native Spanish speakers, plus transcripts

Engaging short stories

A private online community for his Spanish Academy members

Motivating monthly challenges where you can work with other members

There is currently a waiting list to join the Fluent Spanish Academy, however Olly offers free samples of their material while you wait for your place. Check out the Spanish Academy site

2. Easy Spanish YouTube Channel

Easy Spanish have numerous videos that help you learn 100% authentic and natural Spanish. Created by polyglot favourite Easy Languages, the videos offer a mix of language and culture by chatting to people on the streets about certain aspects of their culture or language.

It's informal, it's not very time-consuming - each video is less than 10 minutes, perfect to cram in as a working break between your studies. And most importantly it's fun and fulfils that wonderful language learning motivation: wanting to hear from real people who live somewhere else!

3. XKCD Comic En Español)

Randall Munroe's beloved XKCD webcomic has a global following, so much so that the community of fans decided to create a Spanish version! XKCD en español is available for all strips that the translators found "translatable", and there's enough to keep you going for days and days.

Another perfect study break, or try adding XKCD it into your daily routine. Reading one comic strip a day won't make you fluent, but it will get you used to seeing and reading written Spanish, and these short strips fit into the busiest of days.

4. StudySpanish.com

When I ask Spanish learners for their online favourites, one resource that was always mention is StudySpanish.com. This site offers Spanish courses for three different levels: beginner, intermediate, and advanced.

StudySpanish has been around since 1988, when it was a pioneer in educational websites. They have two different membership levels, one of which is free! Don't worry, the site's design is not stuck in 1988 and I found it inviting and easy to navigate.

5. Madrigal's Magic Key to Spanish

(UK Amazon Link | US Amazon Link)

Margarita Madrigal's textbook on how to learn to read, write, and speak Spanish in only a few short weeks with her proven method has become something of a cult classic as far as language books go. Madrigal's Magic Key to Spanish begins by teaching you the past tense since this is the tense we use when we tell stories, and telling stories is a lot more interesting than repetitive sentences introducing ourselves.

The book's approach is focused on communication, so you'll get most out of this for boosting the speaking skill. Serious students will do well to support this with a grammar book.

The book was originally published in 1953 and is still praised today, more than 60 years later! A must-have for keen learners.

6. Language Transfer

Language Transfer is a platform providing language courses for free in podcast and PDF-form. Project costs are funded through a voting campaign and occasional donations from users. The founder, Mihalis Eleftheriou, works with native speaker volunteers that he sources from the users of LT. The courses are user-funded and users can vote with a small sum of money to decide on the language or level of the next course. They have a complete Spanish course just waiting for you to get listening!

7. El Blog para Aprender Español

El Blog para Aprender Español, written in Spanish with the occasional English translation or guideline, offers free materials for download to use to practice your Spanish. The blog is run by Raquel and María, both Spanish ELE teachers from Madrid with experience from classrooms across Europe.

El Blog offers you everything from an insight into Spanish culture and life in Spain to basic grammar lessons. And if you like these two ladies, you can book them for one-to-one Skype Spanish lessons.

8. PractiSpanish

Hiring a tutor is one of the best investments you can make. Getting a professional tutor can make the difference between "Una cerveza, por favor" and true, authentic communication.

PractiSpanish is a tutoring site created by Lucía, Sonia and José, three experienced and certified Spanish tutors. The website was born out of what they viewed as the most important thing that Spanish students need: a place to practice and apply all the theoretical knowledge available.

These guys are different from giant directories like italki because they are obsessed with encouraging our students to "refresh" their Spanish brain cells between the sessions: replying to emails in Spanish, writing feedback, recommending new Spanish songs, suggesting not to wash the dishes unless there is a Spanish radio or TV channel playing, etc.

If you want creative and enthusiastic Spanish tutors, PractiSpanish is an option you must not miss.

9. Say Something in Spanish

I am a HUGE fan of Say Something in Welsh, so imagine my excitement when I found out about their Say Something in Spanish range!

Say Something In Spanish's system is simple: they say something in English, you say it in Spanish, and then you hear it twice in Spanish.

By turning language learning into a game of words, SSI allows you to explore a new language without the pressure of instant perfection. SSI started out with a very successful Welsh version of their language course, and their Spanish version is just as good.

Try a sample and Say Something in Spanish immediately on this sample page.

Do You Want Even More Insider Tips for Learning Spanish?

I've put all of the above Spanish resources plus 5 more indie resources into a handy PDF page so you can access everything from one page. Get it for free by singing up to the Fluent Cool Kids Club, my huge online library full of awesome bonus content.

Have You Used Any Of These Yet?

Are you using the resources above? Got any other insider tips for Spanish? Let me know in the comments!