#this type of... over bearing micro manage-y 'i have to do everything bc no one else does it right' attitude she has has super not helped me | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

snekdood · 3 months ago

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i love my gma but man I really wish she didn't take on Every Household Responsibility Ever growing up bc she did for a long time take care of my cat for me, which I think is partially why hes such a loud demanding asshole who thinks hes owed the world because she has a tendency to let people (and sub-sequentially animals) walk all over her .-.

#this type of... over bearing micro manage-y 'i have to do everything bc no one else does it right' attitude she has has super not helped me #growing up either. when I was a kid I always wanted to help clean the dishes or whatever but she would always discourage me bc #i 'wouldnt do it right' and just... never decided to teach me how to 'do it right' until way later while im in my late twenties and had to #figure it out on my own through trial and error losing many dishes in the process and also giving up bc no one told me about easier and #more efficient ways to clean...............#she's the type of parental figure who doesnt see weening as super important so i literally had to self ween :|#i dont like to get comfortable having her do anything and everything for me- even if she says its fine- idc.#i dont feel right using her like that even if she says its okay. bc thats how it feels- shes also too old atp for it to just be like a nice #gesture it just makes me feel guilty by default when she does anything for me :\#but goddamn is she so fucking stubborn when you try to help her. shes gotten a bit better with age bc i think shes starting to realize #shes going to have to rely on other people to take care of her and have faith in them to do so #god i remember being so proud of myself as a kid for washing a pan and her just kind of being like 'oh sweety you did it wrong never #do it again please :)' like sdhjgfdshjvsdvfh maybe just tell me how to clean it next time tf?????????#I WANTED TO BE HELPFUL!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHY WOULDNT YOU LET ME BE HELPFUL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#i grew up rich! you gave me no responsibilities! I was comfortable enough in my life feeling like I could extend energy to help.#i wasn't being forced to work so I wanted to work and help!!!! WHY WOULD YOU DISCOURAGE THAT UGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGH #IMAGINE! ALL THE WAYS I COULD'VE BEEN HELPFUL AS A CHILD! BUT NOPE!#IMAGINE ALL THE THINGS I COULD'VE LEARNED ABOUT TAKING CARE OF A HOUSE!!!!!!!!!! BUT NOPE!#yes i do harbor a lot of resentment about this. the habit of cleaning was explicitly trained out of me and then later on when #we didnt have as much money so they did need me to clean they'd just fuckin YELL AT ME ABOUT IT LIKE?????#YOU LITERALLY BRED THAT BEING A HABIT OUT OF ME TF!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?#ofc im bad at cleaning bc the best time to teach me would've been WHEN I WAS ACTIVELY WANTING AND NEEDING IT AS A CHILD #but you waited until I was a teenager to dig my ass about it when all the motivation was gone from me and for some reason think #yelling is going to be the thing that motivates me???? WHY DIDNT YOU SEIZE THE OPPORTUNITY WHEN I WAS A KID AND WANTED TO #i learn a lot better when im curious and not feeling like im being fckn threatened and demanded to do something.#things could have been so much easier.

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