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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 6 months ago

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💝 twst 2024 valentine gift message compilation 🎁

Yes, it’s that time of year again—

For preliminary information on what this is, please check out this post!

This year’s messages came printed on a coffin-shaped piece of paper. (The back of it is shown in the image above.)

The common theme underlying all of the messages is that the sender (you!) gifted the character a fragrance.

***Spoilers below the cut!!***

Riddle

My dear friend—

Thank you for your gift.

I’m not an expert, but I once read

that this type of thing can help with

relaxation. I’ll certainly try it out

soon. I’ll make you herbal tea

sometime as a token of my

gratitude.

Trey

Hello, friend—

Thank you for the lovely gift. I’ve

been busy lately, so it’s nice to have

something to help me relax. You’re

always going the extra mile for

everyone around you. I’ll bring some

homemade sweets over soon to say

thanks, okay?

Cater

Eeey, friendo!

Thanks for the totes ‘Cammable

gift! It looks nice, AND it’s got a

fragrance that’s right up Cay-Cay’s

alley. I’m super excited for the

gift-back, and hope you are, too!

I’m gonna get you something you’ll

be amped to post about on

Magicam.

Ace

Heya, pal—

I never thought you’d get me

something so fancy! It’s got just the

kind of scent I like. You’ve got

perfect taste. I’m gonna use it

soon—thanks! As for what to give

you in return, well… Got any

requests? Just don’t go too

overboard.

Deuce

My good friend—

Thanks for the gift! I didn’t think

it’d be something so fancy. You’ve

got a good eye for this stuff, Prefect!

It’s nice having a fresh scent in my

room to help me focus when I’m

studying! Wait until you see what

grade I get on my next test.

Leona

Hey—

Allow me to thank you for your

generous gift. Heh. Can’t believe

you actually picked out a halfway

decent fragrance. I might actually

keep this. I thought about sending

you something in return if the mood

struck me, but this thank-you note

should do the job just fine, right?

Ruggie

Hey—

Thanks for the gift! I don’t buy

things that aren’t absolute

necessities, so it’s nice getting

something like this. Don’t get me

wrong, though. I’m REALLY not

picky when it comes to people

giving me presents, so feel free to

keep giving me whatever you like!

Jack

Hi.

Thanks for the gift.

This is the kind of subtle fragrance I

can see myself using. I don’t like

being indebted to others, so I’ll

think of something to send in return

so we’re even. Don’t expect too

much. Just sit tight.

Azul

My boon companion—

Thank you for your wonderful gift.

You have quite the eye for quality

and chose a fine fragrance. That

said, I prefer not to accept gifts

without providing anything in

return. Expect something from me

of equivalent value soon.

Jade

My dear friend—

Thank you for your lovely present.

Did you know that morays have

keen senses of smell? I’ll quite enjoy

this. I’d like to treat you to a drink

at the Mostro Lounge in return.

What do you say?

Floyd

Dear Little Shrimpy—

What a neat choice for a present.

Did you pick out this scent ‘cause it

reminded you of me? Kinds funny if

this is the vibe I give you. I guess I’ll

use it if I feel like it. No promises.

Kalim

To my dear friend—

Thanks for the gift. You picked this

fragrance out for me, right? I’m

flattered! Ooh, I know. Next time

you’re in a gift-giving mood, you

could take me shopping to help pick

it out! The more the merrier, right?

Then again, that might defeat the

purpose of the gift… But let’s not

sweat the details!

Jamil

Hello—

I was surprised enough just to

receive a gift from you, but a

fragrance? You never fail to surprise.

It couldn’t have been easy selecting

this. I’ll have to gift you something

appropriate in return.

Vil

Dearest friend—

Thank you for your gift. It was a

rather thoughtful choice; I can use

this when I’m doing stretches. What

would you like in return, I wonder?

You’re getting something

hand-picked by me, so I’ve no doubt

you’ll be pleasantly surprised.

Rook

Bonjour—

And merci boucoup! Did you

choose this just for me? I’m

delighted. The design is so lovely

and elegant. I normally avoid using

fragrances unless it’s a special

occasion, in which case I shall

happily wear one—the one you gave

me, of course.

Epel

Dear classmate—

Thanks for the gift! I don’t know

much about fragrances, but this

one’s mighty fine! It makes my

dorm room feel a smidge more

fancy. I’d better get you something

nice in return. It’s kinds fun

thinking up ideas for that.

Idia

@YOU

uh, are u saying I stink? is this like

a passive-aggressive gesture or sth?

I have questions, but since u gave

it to me, I gratefully accept. I

don’t pay much attention to

fragrances, but this one smelled pretty.

dece when I gave it a whiff.

Ortho

Hello, Prefect—

Thank you for the gift! It’s a

fragrance, right? So this is how you

perceive me. That’s fascinating! I’m

about to do a thorough analysis of

its composition. Who knows? I

might discover something neat. Let

me know what fragrances you’re

into sometime!

Malleus

To my good friend—

Thank you for the gift. Hmm…

This fragrance is meant for pleasure

and relaxation? What a tasteful

choice. I rather like it; perhaps I

shall take more of an interest in

these things. You would be welcome

to pay me a visit, by the way, should

you feel so inclined. I would enjoy

sharing an old tale or two.

Lilia

Greetings!

Thank you for picking something

out for me. It’s a rather nice gift.

Immersing myself in an unusual

fragrance reminds me of my days

visiting other lands. I know! I

should cook for you some foreign

cuisine as a token of gratitude! I can

hardly wait.

Silver

Salutations—

Thank you for your gift. This smell

is so nice and relaxing, it makes me

want to nod off. I hope tjis

improves the quality of my sleep

and helps me want to wake up sooner

when my alarm clock goes off. I’ll let

you know how it goes. Hopefully

well.

Sebek

Human—

I’ve received your gift. Fragrances

are a part of one’s personal

grooming, and you had the nerve to

gift one to ME?! Challenge

accepted. I’ll come up with the

perfect thing to return the

sentiment. You’re going to get

what’s coming to you—mark my

words!

Crowley

Dear esteemed student—

I was quite taken aback when an

unexpected package arrived in the

headmage’s office! To think you

would send me something so

thoughtful… Hmm. This fragrance

suits my tastes nicely. Normally I

wouldn’t be able to accept personal

gifts, but I think I’ll make an

exception for this, seeing as I’m

kind.

Crewel

Dear pup—

What is this? Giving personal gifts

to teachers is hardly good pup

behavior. But the moment I opened

the wrapping, I could tell you

picked this out for me. The design is

suitable enough, as is the fragrance

itself. I suppose I must commend

your knack for gift-giving. Good

boy.

Trein

Dear juvenile—

I generally decline gifts from

students, but you clearly chose this

scent out of respect for me. I won’t

use it around Lucius, but it might

be nice to use in the staff room

every once in a while. I gratefully

accept.

Vargas

Dear student—

What is this? Did I give you

a homework assignment that involved

getting me a present? Kidding, of

course. This is the perfect scent for a

guy as cool as me! I’ll teach you how

to make my signature Vargas

protein drink in return!

Sam

Heya, my little imp!

What is up? Did you pick this out

just for me? It’s a fantastic scent,

thanks! If you’re interested in this

type of thing, I happen to have a

fine selection in stock, so swing by

whenever you want! I’m looking

forward to your next visit.

Grim

Dear minion—

Mrah?! I was expecting tuna, but

instead I get some weird thing

called a fragrance? What IS this

thing? I woulda taken tuna in a

heartbeat, but since my

hench-human picked this out for

me, I guess a proper boss would put

it to good use. Be grateful for my

kindness, partner!

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starsofjewels · 5 months ago

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GREETINGS!! was wondering if you feel up for it if you could do a tyrion x autistic reader? idk how you could make autism fit into the GoT world but I always feel like an outsider even in the real world and i feel tyrion would be one of the few who'd actually be accepting and not judgemental

A Kitty Cat in the Lion’s Den

Tyrion Lannister x Autistic! Lannister! Reader

(Feat.) Tywin Lannister x Autistic! Lannister! Reader

CONTENT: Autistic meltdown, small! Mention of blood/ injury, self-deprecation, the Lannisters are their own warning

Word count: 1.5k (lil pookie bear)

· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·

Hi, beautiful. I absolutely loved this request !! This was only semi triggering to write, and I hope you like it. <3

I’ve just started back at college, so the drip might be dry (not that it wasn’t to begin with). I may or may not have published this during a Free Study period…

This is proof I don’t just write Gregor Clegane fics. But I do love big squishy man and his cock.

I think I probably need to make a masterlist..

· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·

(A teeny PSA before we begin- I, unsurprisingly given the shit I upload on here, am autistic. I’ve struggled with it my whole life, and this is an interpretation of my own experience with autism. ASD is, as the name suggests, a spectrum, so this can’t really be a generalised fic. I put my own personal experiences with my condition into this, so if you’re also autistic/ otherwise neurodivergent and this doesn’t fit your vibes, that’s why. I can’t really explain it any other way, so yeah, here you go.)

Your entire life has served as a reminder that, whether by your own fault or some cruel will of the Gods, you are not wanted. You are the outsider, the youngest Lannister, not beautiful enough to marry off young and, decidedly, not male. Lord Tywin is consistently busy with his duties as the Hand, Tyrion hides with his wines and his whores, and Jaime has his own place in the Red Keep. You are forced to sit with your sister and her ladies, who talk too loudly and prattle on about nonsense.

Cersei, you have long established, does not like you. You aren’t really sure anyone likes you, in the traditional sense, but you know that your sister only keeps you around for fear of Tywin’s wrath. There is something in the back of your mind that remembers a younger, softer Cersei putting you in her lap, of brushing your hair and putting it in gold bows. But, that was before. Before you could walk or talk properly, before you spouted random facts on unasked for topics, before she realised you were different.

Everyone knows you are different, and no one can explain why. Not even you. All they know is to stay away from you, all they know is they’ll never understand how your little mind works.

So, you sit as nicely as you can on the outside of Cersei’s circle of ladies, and you try to focus on your sewing. You don’t like sewing, but it’s what all of the noblewomen do to pass the time, and all you want is to fit in.

“Your sewing is coming on well, my lady.”

The septa tilts your sewing slightly to look at it just a little more. It’s supposed to be a gift for your father, and it is not good. You see every uneven stitch, all of the oddities and bumps in your work that make it so you can hardly look at it. You hate it, and you hate that you can’t even sew properly.

“The stitching is all wrong…”

She takes your hands as you try, again, to pick out your newest stitch, a learned behaviour with you. Despite being with you near your whole life, since you weaned off of your nurse, you aren’t sure the septa completely understands your fascination of perfection,

“It is fine,” Her voice is soft, but you can feel her disappointment, “you are still learning, my lady, some mistakes are natural. You do not need to pull it apart- again.”

You jump when Cersei’s ladies giggle at some joke you haven’t heard, the woman beside you takes your hand, and you are reminded why you keep her so close. At least, in some way, she understands what you like and what upsets you.

Tea is served for the ladies. They give you what Cersei likes, what her ladies eat, green and red things that squish and squelch in your mouth and taste like you’ve eaten rags. And the queen sees you push them around your plate, and scoffs.

“At least try it, sister,” She sips from her wine. You feel each of her noblewomen shift, in turn, to look at you, “a Lannister lady can’t just survive off of the children’s food you eat, we can’t all eat nothing but cakes and plain bread all day.”

But you don’t, and you starve. Tywin will get you something later, you’re sure of it, as he sighs, and gently suggests you’ll need a more varied diet if you’re to marry a good husband.

The women’s giggles practically turn to cackles, which do not stop for what feels like hours. You wish they’d stop, or that you could understand what they find so utterly hilarious, so at least you may join their hysteria. You’ve put your sewing down in your lap, and you fiddle with your hair. The sept doesn’t like that, she guides your work back into your hands.

“Your father doesn’t like it if you mess your hair, sweet girl, you know that,” Her hands find your hair, carefully untangling the knots you’ve made, “try a few more stitches.”

And then, inevitably, it happens. You prick your finger on your needle, and a soft ruby comes from your noble, incomprehensible skin.

Throwing your project to the ground, you rush off as fast as your legs can manage. No one comes to find you.

You are long practised with the subtle art of trying not to cry. You pace back and forth, away from anything and everything, your hands in your hair as you do. The tears in your eyes hurt, they make you tired, and only add to your humiliation. You can do nothing right, why can you do nothing right?

You think of your sister, of perfect, beautiful, poised Cersei- She has a gaggle of women to do her bidding she is loved, and desires and you doubt she paces the halls trying not to cry. She is the lion queen, and you are her kitty-cat of a sister.

And then, you hear your name called. Followed by hurried footsteps toward you. Tyrion takes your hands in his, but you cannot even look at him.

“Has someone upset you? Cersei?”

All you can do is give him whines in response. You feel a sob bubbling in your throat, and you cannot give him the satisfaction of seeing you weak.

“Tell me.”

So you look down, you watch his eyes change from confusion, to the pity you are so used to seeing. But he is your older brother, and you know he won’t run back to Cersei, like Jaime would.

It comes in one, huge splurge, as tears fall against your skin and ruin the pretty powders your maids spent so long putting on you this morning,

“I- Was making a gift for Father-” You gasp, “And they didn’t give me anything to eat, and- and the sewing was terrible, but Septa is lying and saying it’s good and-” Another. “And I cut myself!”

His arms wrap around you, and he puts his head against you. Though much smaller than you, it offers greater comfort than he knows it does. All you can do is sob. You feel like a child.

No words are spoken as he takes you down to the kitchens, and puts you at the staff table. You are given something you eat with relish, and get a plate of pudding for your effort. There is no need for you to have any medical attention for your injury, but he has it wrapped anyway. A psychological comfort, if nothing else.

Tyrion helps you into bed, letting you reach out for the rag dolls your sister claims you’re too old for. You want your father, you want him to go and tell off Cersei, but you have your brother instead, and he at least semi-understands what it’s like to be different.

“I’m sorry,” you turn and look up at him,

“Sorry?”

He stands, walking to your window to look out at the courtyard below.

“When you look at me, what do you see?”

Tyrion is going somewhere with this, you know that much, but what, you are left wondering,

“I see… my brother.”

“Yes, you do. But the world? What does the world see? They see a drunk, lustful little man with a lion on his chest he doesn’t deserve.”

Something in you knows that it’s true. Tyrion is nothing more than his condition to the eyes of most in the Keep, most of the kingdom.

“You, you look like a Lannister. Your brokenness is inside. And I wish I could understand it.”

“It’s alright-” You sit up, clutching your doll, “It’s just… what it is. I have you, I have Father.”

Tyrion almost scoffs, he comes back from the window, passing you your water,

“Yes, you get Father, but that’s because you are utterly adorable.”

“I am adorable, aren’t I?”

“And humble, it appears.”

When Tyrion leaves, he kisses your forehead, and you know he is going to tell Father. You are the one thing they share something of a common interest in, and you suspect Tywin will make an appearance at some point. You’re right, of course.

It is Tywin’s heartbeat you listen to to calm yourself down for sleep. Your father strokes your hair, half-dozing himself. A soft, sweet moment that you are reminded Tyrion doesn’t have the privilege of.

Cersei is no longer allowed to be your main caretaker, you spend your afternoons out in the gardens, or sit entertaining yourself in Tywin’s solar. Tyrion takes you on walks, and there is something of a peaceful normality brought about.

You are still terribly disappointed in how Tywin’s gift turns out, it looks like a child made it, and when you become obviously quite upset over the manner, you have the Old Lion and his younger son to calm you. He loves it, he assures you, and Tyrion is so enamoured by it he requests his own. You know they are simply making you feel better, but you let it happen anyway.

And, perhaps, life is not so bad after all.

#game of thrones #got #game of thrones x reader #got x reader #game of thrones x y/n #tyrion lannister x reader #tywin lannister x reader #lannister!reader #autistic!reader #request #requested #thanks anon!

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coraniaid · 7 days ago

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I know I keep going on about this, but I really do think that the majority of the Buffy fandom downplays the importance of Buffy's relationship with her mother to, at times, an almost ludicrous extent. Obviously it's not a perfect relationship (if you think Buffy has a perfect relationship with anyone on the show you've really not been paying attention) and indeed at times it's a very strained one, but it's a central part of understanding who Buffy is and why she says and does things that a lot of writing about Buffy on this site just ... pretends isn't there.

There are more or less extreme examples of this -- I saw a "Giles should have adopted Buffy!" post a couple of years ago that didn't even acknowledge that Buffy had a mother who might have objected -- but so much analysis of the show seems not to engage seriously with the thought that Buffy might care about her mother as a person or worry about her mother's opinion of her. And really, the show is very, very clear about this. There are multiple episodes in the high school seasons where the emotional stakes only make sense if you accept that 'demons from hell might end the world' and 'Joyce might think her daughter is getting into trouble at school' are two roughly equivalent problems for Buffy to navigate.

I recently saw a post about Season 5 that listed Joyce's death as just one of several different reasons for Buffy's burgeoning depression that season -- along with Riley leaving and her having to drop out of college -- but .... that's not right, is it? Those aren't three isolated and independent issues at all. All of those factors go back to Buffy's mom. Riley leaves her in Into The Woods because he decided the fact she's too worried about her mom getting sick to spend time humoring his fragile ego means she doesn't really love him. Buffy drops out of college in Tough Love because her mother died and she has to take care of her sister ... which, when you remember that Dawn is explicitly presented as a stand-in for Buffy ("she's more than [my sister]," Buffy tells us in The Gift, "she's me"), can only be read as Buffy dropping out because she has to take care of herself. "Who's going to take care of us?" as she asked Dawn in Forever.

Buffy's depressive spiral in Season 5 happens because her mother dies. There are aggravating factors, sure, but this is surely the heart of it. It's not because her crappy boyfriend left or she suddenly remembered she was a Slayer. It's because her mom gets sick and dies, and Buffy Summers -- who is afraid of hospitals, who blames herself for every death in Sunnydale, who has been trying to protect her mother from the supernatural for years, who hates the very thought of there being problems in the world she can't solve, who loves her mother more than she can say -- doesn't know what to do about it.

"I don't know how to live in the world [...] if everything just gets stripped away. I don't see the point. I just wish my mom was here," she tells Giles in The Gift. It's Buffy who turns to the door to let the shadow of her mother back inside in Forever, and Dawn who has to break the spell that brought her back. In Season 6, Buffy is trapped by a demon in a fantasy world where she was never the Slayer and her mother is still alive, and it's that image of her mother, telling her that she's strong and urging her not to give up which allows her to break free. When Giles comes back to England that season, and offers Buffy a temporary reprieve from all her new financial worries, the highest praise Buffy has for him is that this uncharacteristic generosity on his part is "a little like having Mom back".

There are people in the world Buffy cares about as much as her mother (but not as many as some of you think), and there are perhaps a dozen characters who appear in the show more or get more speaking time than Joyce Summers, and there are certainly lots of characters the writers obviously care much more about as people in their own right. (Like many of you, the writers seem pretty dubious about the idea that middle-aged women could ever be interesting.)

But there is nobody in the world who means more to Buffy than her mother, and I think trying to analyze the show as if there were is going to give you a very strange impression of what's actually going on. Ideas like, well, maybe Giles should have adopted Buffy.

#btvs #PSA: this post is about the fictional character Joyce Summers #I promise that it is not in any way about your mother #nor is this an invitation to complain about her or project her failings onto Mrs Summers #if you have any issues with your own mother you'd like to share with the group then maybe do it in your own fucking post

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lamentationsofalonelypotato · 11 months ago

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Chapter 11: I Can't Think With You Yelling At Me!

Pairing: Soldier Boy x f!reader, Reader POV

Summary: When the reader left Payback 40 years ago after a falling out with her childhood best friend she never looked back, but when two men show up to her apartment and start asking her questions about the past, the reader begins to think those things can’t stay hidden and starts to question what’s real and what’s fantasy. This is a re-telling of The Boys Season 3, where the reader is a supe who's known Soldier Boy since 1927. The chapters will fluctuate between past and present. This is chapter eleven of my "You Call It Madness But I Call It Love" series. (I'm so bad at summaries please forgive me!)

Word Count: 6.2K

Warnings: References to sex, Cursing, Drinking, Soldier Boy might be, is, really, absolutely, a little OOC, Angst.

Note: This is told from Reader's perspective. Any references to the reader is made using you or your. There is minimal use of y/n. I tried my best to proofread, but nobody's perfect. Reader is described as "curvy" occasionally. If you don’t like, don’t read, but if you do like, you’re my favorite!

Internal Monologue is in first person and is in italics

Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist

A/N: This one takes a bit of a turn guys, but I promise I know what I'm doing. :) Maybe? Probably?

Previously:

Suddenly your phone rings, shattering the still silence in your apartment. For a second you hope that it's Butcher returning your call, but when you answer, it's not Butcher.

"Hello?"

"I need you." The familiar voice says.

Shit.

Present Day

“Thank you so much for coming!” Rosemary says dragging you through the front door of her two-bedroom apartment. “The sitter cancelled and I’ve got 5 minutes to make it to the hospital.”

Her dark brown hair frizzes out of a messy bun at the back of her head waving as she emphasizes her point with rapid hand gestures. The dusting of freckles across her cheeks catches in the light from the open windows at the back of her apartment as she traverses through the minefield of toys and children's books sprawled over the bright blue couches, the pastel rug, and the coffee table in the spacious living room.

As heartbroken as you were, you never regretted the night you and Ben spent together, because that meant you wouldn't have had Rosemary and you didn't want to imagine a world without her in it. She was the only good that came from that night. A surprise, but a welcome one. The years that followed losing Ben should have been empty, filled with an endless wandering of the world from someone who couldn’t age and couldn’t die, but they weren’t. Ben might have broken your heart, but he gave you the greatest gift. Rosemary filled the hole in your life and you wouldn’t change a thing. Even if it always ended up like this.

Well, besides the whole Ben possibly being alive this whole time and being tortured in a foreign country.

Rosemary was another reason why you had gotten out of being a supe. You didn't want that life for her and you were afraid that Vought would take her away. She was a second generation supe from two of the first and two of the most powerful supes. So for the early years of her life you lived on the coast of Maine in a small town, making sure that Rosemary had as normal a life as she could, despite having superpowers. At first you thought that she was like Ben, she was strong, faster than the average person, and had enhanced senses, but then you realized that her powers were more like yours except Rosemary did not have to die to obtain the powers of another supe. Rosemary could replicate any ability from a supe that she touched for one day, something you both realized when she was two and started to move things telekinetically around the house after she grabbed on to your arm and wouldn't let go. Which may have been fun for her, but not for you. Chasing around a two year old that could suddenly levitate sharp objects and throw them anywhere she wished was far from your idea of a good time.

When you moved back to NYC 10 years ago, the last time you saw Legend, you decided to introduce Rosemary as your cousin whenever anyone asked, including Stan Edgar, who showed up to one of your art shows as soon as you reappeared in the city, prepared to find out if you were Indigo.

You examine your daughter’s flustered expression, the wrinkled black scrubs, and the frantic beat of her heart that thuds loudly in your ears. Rosemary looked more like Ben than you. They had the same eyes, the same dark brown hair that turned into liquid honey in the sunlight, but you were the same height and had the same nose, your father's nose to be exact. And although Rosemary should be 39, she looked barely older than 27.

But despite her resemblance to Ben, it didn’t pain you to see her. You liked to think that she was a reminder of the boy you used to know, the one that you held on to for so many years when things got hard and all you saw was Soldier Boy and not the boy you loved.

She was the only person who knew everything about you and everything about Ben. She was the only family you had left, well, except for-

“Aunty y/n!” A small pink blur leaps towards your face from the end of the couch, to latch onto your upper body like a monkey climbing a tree.

You catch your four year old granddaughter, Lou, with a smile, twirling her around in the air. Despite your relation, you made sure that Lou referred to you as aunt, as afraid as you were for exposing Rosemary to Vought, fear that they would take Lou away too haunted you at night. Rosemary also did not call you mom, except after Lou went to bed and only when she was upset.

You both figured that it was easier this way, at least until Lou was old enough to understand why you did things the way you did them.

Thankfully, Lou still hadn't presented any powers, which made you and Rosemary happy. It made finding a babysitter easier when you didn’t have to worry about a four year old picking up a couch and throwing it through a window.

Being with your family always made you feel better, despite everything that happened with yours, you always remembered what your father ingrained in you as a child- that the only real wealth in life was family.

Of course he also was the son of the man who owned more than half of the real-estate in Philadelphia and who personally invested with Andrew Carnegie and John D. Rockefeller, so he had room to make generalized statements like that.

When you first got the injection and refused to marry Howard it strained the relationship you had with your parents, well, mostly your mother. She hadn't taken it well, thought you were throwing your life away on Ben. Meanwhile your father and you continued to send letters back and forth until the day he died, despite your mother's want for him to cut ties with you. He was always supportive of what you were doing, wanted to know how Ben was, how you were, and would meet you for dinner occasionally in New York whenever he could. Ben would make an appearance every once in a while, but your mother never came, and it was always like a giant purple spotted elephant was sitting at the table beside you.

You wondered how much grief she gave your father whenever he went to see you. You had tried several times to send your mother letters, telling her of all the good you were doing, but she would send them back unopened. When your father died, you showed up to the funeral and she refused to let you sit on the pews reserved for family. Ben had come with you, and you practically had to drag him away when he started to yell back at her because he knew that despite you being all grown up, he knew that you weren’t strong enough to stand up to her.

"Hey Lou." You smile at your granddaughter. She too had Ben's brown hair, but her eyes were like yours that shone with excitement and happiness.

When Rosemary’s husband died just after Lou was born, you stepped in whenever you could to help her, that meant occasionally babysitting so Rosemary could go to work her overnight nursing shifts downtown in the emergency room.

"I missed you!" Lou hugs you around the neck. She's wearing a floral long sleeve shirt and a pair of pink overalls. Pink was her favorite color and you tried not to be reminded of the dresses your mother forced you to wear when you were younger.

"You saw me three days ago." You brush back the tangled mass of curls from her smiling face.

"Too long." Lou replies.

Rosemary breezes back into the room, toting a large bag over her shoulder. "Okay. I'm so sorry-"

"Don't apologize again!" You wave a hand. "Just go. We'll be okay."

"What are you going to do?" She roots through the bag, looking for some unseen object.

"Oh the usual. Watch Texas Chainsaw Massacre. I've heard great things about the remake-" You wanted to test if she was listening.

"Y/n!"

She passed.

"I'm kidding Rosie." You put your free hand on her shoulder, noticing the wear in her eyes and the dark circles that frame them. You try to remember if things were as hard for you when you were her age. Given that you had already been injected with Compound V and were living as a superhero you figured that they were.

Maybe when everything calms down we can all go for a long vacation somewhere.

"Okay." She sighs. Her eyes search your face for a second, brows pinching together. "Are you okay?"

You always thought her ability to read you was almost supernatural, but Rosemary wasn’t psychic.

"Um. It's been a rough few days." You shrug, adjusting your grip on Lou.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She looks worried.

"Yes. There are a few things we need to talk about. But when you get home. Go on. I can take care of the little gremlin for a few hours."

You didn't like it when she worried about you. Rosie had enough on her shoulders, she didn’t need the 90 plus years of baggage you dragged around everywhere. But what had happened over the past few days deserved a conversation. You were going to go to Russia to find out what happened to Ben and you weren't sure when you would come back or if you could. Going to Russia might mean exposing your identity, which meant you might have to cut and run. You also weren’t sure how much damage had been done after what happened with Countess. When you killed her, you had expected Vought or the police to show up at your door, but you thought that you covered your tracks pretty well. There wasn't a piece of her trailer left and no evidence to convict you, well, aside from the burned jacket in your apartment that you needed to get rid of. You were still hoping that you could salvage it, but it was doubtful.

Your thoughts drift to Rosemary and Lou. The thought of leaving them behind destroyed you, but if it meant keeping them safe from Vought, you knew that you'd have to do it. But you also wondered if you could leave them behind. They were all you had left.

"Okay. I love you." Rosie half-hugs you with her free hand.

"Love you too. Be careful."

"I love you mommy!" Lou crows as Rosemary kisses her on the head and walks out the front door.

"Alright, what do you want to do?" You ask Lou putting her down.

"PAINT!" She raises her hands over her head like a triumphant gladiator.

"I like where your head's at kid." You smile down at her. "Go get your kit, I'll meet you in the kitchen."

When Rosemary gets home twelve hours later, Lou is asleep, but you sit up on the couch with your sketchbook.

Painting with Lou had been enough of a distraction from everything that happened the past few days and the memories of the past that kept rising at the back of your mind, but when she went to bed they started to rush back. The sketchbook had started as a way of escaping the thoughts of what you did to Countess and what she said about you and Ben, but the only thing that you could draw was him. His strong jaw, arching brow, bright green eyes, and mischievous smirk haunted you from the page in front of you.

You hadn't drawn him in over thirty years, hadn't seen him in forty, but you still remembered everything about him, his voice, his laugh, his smile… You had to actively shut off your brain to stop from thinking about him, but none of the usual tricks were working. All you could think about was what if he was alive out there and if the Russians had been torturing him all these years. He was alone.

Did he think that no one cared about him? That no one wanted him?

Yes you hated what he did to you, and as much as you wished that you didn't care, you did. And as much as he hurt you, the Ben you knew would have never left you to rot, he would have come for you and you knew that was what you needed to do for him. The problem now would be telling Rosemary.

Your daughter knew about him. You’d never held anything back when she asked you about her father, including the reason why you two "broke up." In hindsight it was probably not the greatest decision you'd made to tell her exactly what happened, but it was nice to have someone to confide in. And the two of you didn't keep secrets from one another.

"Hey." She whispers with a heavy sigh, collapsing onto the couch beside you. Rosemary drags here eyes around the apartment. "Did you clean?"

"Yeah. It was a bit messy." You smile, shutting the sketchpad so she can't see the page. "Plus I figured it would be nice to be able to sit on the couch without getting probed by one of Lou’s toys."

"Yeah. Don't think I need another little mermaid toy 'exploring' the secrets of the cave, if you know what I mean."

You laugh at her. "How was the shift?"

"Bleh."

"That good?"

"Mhmm." She leans her head against your bicep.

"You know I've been thinking," You put your arm around her shoulders. "Maybe we should all just get away for a few days. We haven't been to the coast in a while. And Lou loves the beach-"

"Don't you have that big show coming up next month?"

"Yeah, but I’ve been feeling a little bit uninspired. I'm thinking about postponing.”

She sits up to look at you, suspicious. "Alright, what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong-"

Everything is wrong and I have no idea how to tell you what I need to.

“You have never once postponed a show before.” She raises an eyebrow. "And you’re the worst liar.”

"I’m not lying I am feeling a little bit uninspired.”

"Mom."

"Fine." But you still have no idea how to start the conversation.

How do I tell her that it’s possible her father has been alive this whole time and that he’s currently being held against his will in a Russian Lab? Why is this my life? What did I do to deserve this?

"Is this about Crimson Countess?" Rosemary asks, nudging her shoulder into yours.

"What?" Your head snaps up.

"Her death was on the news. I figured that hearing her name again would make you feel a little-" She moves her head back and forth trying to decide on the word. "Weird."

"It's partly that." You bite the inside of your cheek. "I'm going out of town for a few days-"

Oh and I killed Crimson Countess.

"Where?"

"I can't tell you?" Your face scrunches up as you say it.

"What?"

You sigh and rise from the couch, pacing in front of it. How do I explain this? How do I tell her?

"Why can't you tell me where you’re going? Is this another retreat for your art again? Like when you went camping?“ She almost sounds hopeful, as if that will make any of this okay.

Nothing is okay.

"A few days ago some men showed up at my apartment looking for me."

"Really? Why?"

"They wanted to know about Ben."

Rosie frowns at the mention of her father’s name. “Why? He's dead. And it's been what? 40 years?" She pulls one of the multicolored pillows into her lap, smoothing her finger over the stripes. The shift in her mood is obvious.

"I don't know. They introduced themselves as government agents and I told them the usual lie about Indigo being my mother and that she was dead. And told them a limited amount of information-"

"I still don't see why you have to leave for a few days?" She interrupts.

You press your lips into a tight line.

This is not going to end well.

Rosemary frowns. “What did you do?”

How can she read me so well? I'm her mother, I should be the one doing the reading!

"Alright, I'm going to say something and you can't freak out." Your hands are clasped in front of your chest tightly, trying to think of a way to tell her that you killed Countess.

"What?"

"Promise me."

"I promise."

"I killed her." You say it slowly, gauging her reaction.

"Who?"

"Crimson Countess. I lost control and I killed her."

"What?" Rosie rises from the couch so quickly you think she's flying. "You killed Crimson Countess?"

"Shhh. You're going to wake Lou. And what happened to the promise-" You look down the darkened hallway where your granddaughter is asleep in her room.

Because that's just what the situation needs, for Lou to find out I'm a murderer.

"Fuck the promise! Why were you even with her?" Rosemary asks you, her eyes are still wide.

"That's why it's complicated-"

"Uncomplicate it now." She puts her hands on her hips looking ridiculously like your mother.

"I went there because I started to think about how Ben died, and I realized that I never heard it from her. I heard it from Legend and from Stan Edgar and I wanted to-“

"So you killed her?"

"She said a lot of things that upset me, but she also told me that-" The words catch in the back of your throat. "That Ben might not be dead."

"He's what?" She shouts.

"Rosemary I'm serious you have to stop shouting. Your neighbors are going to call the cops and that's the last thing I want right now."

"Well obviously because you murdered someone and covered it up!"

"Please get off the high horse. She wasn’t a good person.” You snap before you can stop yourself.

Guess the guilt is gone. Honestly, what guilt?

"Fine." She closes her eyes and takes in a deep breath. "Go on."

"The Russian army took him. Which means that there's a possibility he's still alive and I need to know." You didn't expect her to understand why you needed to go. You just hoped that she would let you.

"Are you kidding? This guy did terrible things to you and to other people! He said horrible things to you and you're going to go help him? I say just leave him to rot!” Her green eyes flash around the room, familiar in a way that makes your heart ache.

Her harsh words hurt. Rosemary only knew what you’d told her about her father and although you tried to tell her about the way Ben was when he was younger as she got older Rosemary wanted to know why you and Ben had a fight. And you didn't like lying to her. Now you consider that maybe you should have.

Because what if he was alive? Would she want to meet him? Would he care enough to want to meet her or Lou? I mean I can cut him out of my life, but if Rosemary wants to know him I shouldn't stand in her way...

You and Ben weren't exactly careful that night, but you weren't sure if he just never cared about that kind of thing before. You weren't sure if he actually wanted kids, the one time you'd asked him and he'd said it "maybe" sounded nice to have some kids. You didn't know if that was a good standard to hold him to or not, given that he was drunk when he said it.

Then again, Ben was always drunk.

"I know that you can't understand this, but even though I hate him, I can't leave him. If the roles were reversed, if it was me, Ben wouldn't leave me. Even with everything he said.” Your chest tightens. "And it hurts me to think that he's been there since 1984 with those people doing God knows what to him."

Rosie sighs. "Mom, I know that you love him, but maybe it's better this way. He’s out of you life. You’re doing better than you were. You said it yourself you felt trapped when you were a supe-“

"He might not even be there. I just need to know what happened. And that means I have to leave for a little bit and I’m not sure when I’ll be able to come back.”

"Wait what do you mean? You'd come back. You'd go over there, find out and then come back right?" She looks confused.

You press your lips together. "There's a possibility that if I do this, it will expose me, and I’ve already evaded Vought once. I’m not sure I can do it again.”

"So, what? You're gonna go over there and throw away everything for a guy that shit all over your heart and threw you away? Really? You're going to throw Lou and me away for him?" She's gesturing wildly with her hands now, eyes flashing around the room and again you're reminded of Ben.

"I'm not throwing you away-"

It breaks your heart that she'd think that you'd do that, that you were willing to sacrifice them so easily.

Am I doing that?

"You're throwing away the life that you've built for yourself. You told me that you were more happy now that you'd been in the past. And now as soon as you hear about him you go right back? Just like how he made you leave your family-"

"He didn’t make me leave my family, it was my choice! I’m not throwing away the life that I have made and I'm not throwing away you or Lou. If you or Lou were taken, you better believe that I would fight for you, I wouldn't leave you to fend for yourselves for any amount of time. You are my family. And yes Ben is an asshole and I've hated him for the past forty years, but I can't leave him."

"I can't believe you're doing this." She pinches the bridge of her nose frustrated.

"I believed after all these years that the reason why Ben died was because I wasn't there. And Countess confirmed it."

"But he's not dead!"

"Maybe. But they made us fight so that I wouldn't be there. They wanted us to fight because they knew they wouldn't be able to stop me if they turned on him-" You try to reason with her, but you know she won’t listen.

She's just so damn stubborn. Just like someone else I know.

"That doesn't matter! That doesn't make what he did or said any less okay." Rosie snaps, before her gaze softens. “It doesn’t change anything. They may have caused you guys to fight, but Ben said those things to you. They didn’t make him say that or do that. He chose to. And I can’t believe that you’re going to forgive him-“

"I don't have to forgive him and I don’t want to. It’s not about forgiveness. I can't leave him. He might be able to turn his back on me, but I can’t stand back and ignore him if he needs help. Believe me I wish I could. I wish that after everything that happened I could walk away, but I can't. And I know you don't understand that but-" You try to take a step towards her, but she steps back.

"That's not what I don't understand. What I don't understand is you playing with the possibility of losing this for him." She gestures around the apartment. "Do we really mean that little to you that you drop everything for someone that used you and treated you like you meant nothing?"

"You both mean everything to me. Trust me when I say that, but the fact that those two men showed up at my apartment and everything that happened with Countess means that I'm already involved. They already made this about me. I don't know why they needed to know about him, and I want to know why.”

“I can’t believe this.” She stalks past you into the kitchen to get down a bottle of tequila from the top shelf above the stainless steel refrigerator where she locks it away from Lou.

“Rosemary you’re so young-“

“Don’t make this about age. You’re older than me and you should know better.” She angrily pours a shot of tequila before knocking it back.

You try not think that the answer to all of your problems might lie in the bottom of that bottle. Sobriety definitely wasn’t getting any easier, not after you killed Countess or the revelation that Ben was possibly still alive. And especially not now in this fight.

“When you finally told me about him, it was the first time I’d ever seen you break.” Rosemary isn’t looking at you, she's looking down at the floor. “You’ve always been this strong independent figure in my life. You never needed anyone’s help to raise me. You’re so strong and formidable, but then you told me what he did to you and I’ve never seen you look so small.”

The memories of what happened between you and Ben surge up again, but you beat them away with a stick. The last thing you wanted right now was to relive that in the middle of this fight.

She looks up, locking eyes with yours. “I don’t know why you would do this to yourself again, put yourself through that-”

“Because I still love him.” You mutter. As soon as you say it, you know it’s true. Ben did terrible things, said horrible things, but deep down you still loved the boy you grew up with. And maybe that was the problem, you imagined the boy you grew up being tortured and left to rot, and the thought broke you. “And I don’t know how to stop. Even after everything he did, we spent so many years together and the memory of them doesn't just vanish. I won’t be able to live with myself knowing that I could have helped him and I didn’t.”

Rosemary stands there halfway in the kitchen and the living room, the bottle hanging from her right hand. This time she drinks right from the bottle before answering. “If you really need to do this, then I'm going with you."

"No."

"Why not? I'm as powerful as you-"

"It's not about being powerful, I don't want this life for you, I've never wanted this life for you. I've worked so hard to keep you out of it-"

"But-"

"No. This is why I introduce you as my cousin, why you were homeschooled, why Lou is homeschooled, why Lou doesn't call me grandma, why you don't call me mom around other people. If Vought finds out about you or Lou, it won't matter. None of this will matter.”

"You don't know that." She says it softly.

"I do." You take her hand. "Rosemary, you are one of the strongest supes I've ever met and you're second generation. And Lou, we don't even know what her powers are, but I can guarantee that as soon as Vought finds out they will come for you both. There's a reason why I never told them what my real power was. I kept you both far from this and I don't want them to know."

"I don't want you to do this alone. What happens if you get taken over there?"

"What if you come with me and we both get taken? What about Lou then? What would happen to her? I don't want her to grow up without a family. Please. Just let me do this. It’ll probably take 2-3 days tops.”

Rosemary doesn’t look happy. “I don’t care how long it’s going to take. The only thing I care about is losing you.”

“They’re not going to take me-“

“Not just then.” She sighs. “I mean after. If you do have to cut and run-.” Rosemary shifts her eyes towards the hallway where Lou is asleep in her room before bringing them back to you. “I don’t care how complicated it is, we will go with you.”

“I won’t ask you to do that-“

“It’s what family does. It’s a sacrifice that I’m willing to make. I can always get another job, Lou can be homeschooled anywhere, and I don’t want Lou to live in a world where you’re not here. She needs her grandmother.”

Her words make tears prick in your eyes as you watch her determined stance. Rosemary and Lou were the only family you had left, the only two people that you cared about in the whole world. And maybe she was right, maybe you were throwing it all away for Ben. You hated yourself for wanting to help him, but you knew if the roles were reversed Ben would have come for you.

Well, the old Ben would have come to get me, maybe not Soldier Boy.

"You got another glass?" You ask with a sigh, looking at the bottle in her hand.

"You sure?" Rosemary raises an eyebrow.

"I'm gonna need it to get through the next few days. There's no way I can do any of this shit sober." You mutter following her into the kitchen.

Ten minutes later, you're both sitting at her kitchen table with a bottle of whiskey and a fresh bottle of tequila between you. The haze of alcohol is making you feel infinitely better given the past few days you've had.

The whiskey burns pleasantly as you take a drink from the bright green sippy cup in your hand. Rosemary hadn’t washed dishes so this was the best she had. You knew you probably looked ridiculous.

Rosemary eyes you. "I can't believe you're drinking."

"I really needed this." You snort. "Given the past few days I've had-"

"I also can't believe you killed her."

"She wasn't a good person." You frown remembering what Countess said to you. "Plus I never liked her even before everything that happened. I know that's not a god enough reason to kill someone, but I can't change that now." You run your fingers through your hair to push it back from your face, trying to lose yourself in the buzz, but Ben keeps flashing through your mind.

Damn it, he's invaded by subconscious again.

Another few minutes pass as Rosemary sits there taking a sip from the bottle in front of her. “Do you really miss him that much?”

You pause considering the question. “Yes and no. I miss the person he used to be, before all of this. I think that’s the problem. I’m holding on to the person I grew up with. That’s all I keep thinking. That boy I knew being tortured in that lab.”

“It’s why you stayed on Payback for so long?”

“Yeah.” You take another drag of whiskey frowning at the sippy cup. “Sometimes I’d get glimpses, shapes really and it would make me forget who he was as Soldier Boy and then when I woke up the next day, Soldier Boy was back and Ben was gone.”

There were always quiet moments when it was just the two of you, when you forgot who he became and all you saw was the boy you used to know. When the cameras weren't rolling, the team was gone, and Ben was crashing at your apartment, for some unknown reason. He would do that, continue to show up at your apartment like he had when you were kids. It never made sense to you, especially because he only slept in your room growing up to escape his father. You couldn't think of a reason why he slept at your apartment when you were adults.

Probably just didn't want to be alone.

“That’s why you slept with him?”

“Yes. That night all I saw was the old Ben. And then I woke up with Soldier Boy.” You bite the inside of your cheek as the memory of the morning that followed washes over your mind. You never understood why he ran to Countess, never understood how he could push you away after all the years you spent together. Why he lied and said that he didn't care, because he had to. After everything you’d been through Ben had to care. You remember what Countess said to you and your shoulders sink under the weight.

Or maybe he was just a better liar than I thought.

“Do you regret sleeping with him?”

You look up at your daughter. She really does look like Ben. She was strong, determined, stubborn, and the way she held herself was so confident. And even though she would have been one of the strongest supes she chose to be a nurse, chose to devote her life to helping people instead of the shock and awe of the superhero world. You were so proud of her. You wondered if Ben would be too.

“No.”

“Why? You say that you loved who he was and then he-"

“Because he gave me you. I wouldn’t change a thing. You and Lou are the only thing that matter to me. I know you hate it when I say this, but you’re so young, you have no idea what it’s like to live as long as I have without changing. And whenever it was just me and Soldier Boy I was so alone until Ben came back. I don’t think I would have lasted these years without you Rosemary, think I would have given in to Vought or maybe gone to the government-“

“Are you serious?” Her eyebrows pull together as a worried frown graces her lips. She knew what you were saying.

“Yeah. But I am happy. Happy for the first time in a long time. The problem now is dealing with everything over there.”

“How about I come with you and wait in a hotel-" Rosemary tries again.

“No. It has to be me. I have to go.”

She sighs. “I just hate the idea that you’re not going to come back.”

“I’m going to come back." You smile. "If you can remember I'm a supe too-"

“If they’ve been able to hold him all these years, that means they could take you too.”

“Don’t know if I should be scared or impressed.” You snort into the cup.

“It not funny.”

“Fine, if I’m not back in a week, then I give you permission to come. But I don’t think you’ll need to.”

"You're old and decrepit. Probably will need my help-"

"Low blow."

She smiles faintly.

You roll the glass in your hand for a moment, watching the amber liquid swirl against the green sides. "If he is alive, would you want to meet him?"

Rosemary takes a long pull of tequila, but doesn't answer for a long time. "When I was a kid, sometimes I'd imagine that he was still alive-"

"What?" You looked at her genuinely shocked. You hadn't realized that she ever thought about Ben.

"That he would walk up our long driveway at our house in Maine and we'd be a family. That was before you told me about that night." She runs one of her fingers down the label of the bottle frowning. "I don't know. After what he did to you, I don't know. Plus I’m almost forty years old, don’t really think I need a father now.”

This time you reach for the bottle of Whiskey, not bothering with the empty sippy cup. "Maybe I shouldn't have told you what he did. Should have let you fantasize about him, see the good-"

"I'm glad you did." She squeezes your hand. “And you didn't just show me the bad, you told me about the good times too."

"Maybe too much bad."

"I don't hate him. I'm mad at him for what he did to you, but I don't hate him."

"So it's a maybe?"

"I guess. I say that now, but I think my reaction if I do ever meet him will probably be the complete opposite. I’m also not sure if he should be around Lou.”

“Ben wouldn’t hurt her.” You press your lips together. "I don't think he would."

“Maybe not intentionally.”

"He's not a bad guy, well-" You take a sip from the bottle, remembering the fight. “He’s just complicated. I guess.”

And I'm still making excuses for him.

“Sounds like you’re going to forgive him.” Rosemary is frowning at you.

For someone who wants to maybe meet him, she’s acting like she still doesn’t want me to forgive him.

“Trust me, our story is over, finally. I’m just going to bust him out of wherever the hell he is and then I’ll never have to see him ever again.” You remember what you yelled at one another the night of the premiere and it strengthens your resolve. You didn't want to forgive him, you just wanted to get him the hell out of Russia and maybe slap him around a bit and then go home and finally move on with your life. Because you were slowly realizing you never did, you just packed it all away deep down and pretended to move on. "This isn't about forgiveness, it's so I can live with myself."

"I just don't think you should forgive him so easily."

"I don't want to and I'm not going to. He doesn't deserve that." You mutter that last part into the bottle, because it was true. Ben didn't deserve your forgiveness, hell, he didn't deserve you risking your life to find him, but you had to. His death left such a big hole in your life and you beat yourself up about it for years, you not being there for him when he needed you the most. But now, going to Russia, getting him back, meant that you could finally move on, that you could close the hole and finally be at peace.

Rosemary leans back in her chair with a sigh. “Promise me, you're going to come back."

"I promise. Not even Homelander can stop me." You smile at her. “Now I just got to figure out where Ben is.”

Easy. Yeah right.

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prythiansprincess · 2 years ago

Note

Hey! I love your work! I was wondering if you could do a Azriel x reader fic where reader doesn’t know a lot about males and so az (maybe he already has a thing for reader) offers to give her lessons? The more NSFW the better 😉

innocence.

author's note: sorry for being m.i.a. please accept this as my apology gift. largely inspired by this song. you can't tell me that az doesn't have the biggest corrpution kink 😏

it started out innocently enough.

one winter evening after a particularly rowdy wine night, you and azriel laid in a heap at the house of wind, giggling at nothing as the warmth of the alcohol lowered your inhibitions and loosened your lips.

"never?" azriel asked incredulously, his brows creasing in the most adorable way. "you've truly never kissed anyone?"

you pouted, crossing your arms. thanks to cassian and his big mouth, the shadowsinger now knew the true extent of your naivete. growing up in the high priestess's temple in the dawn court, you had devoted much of your life to duty and training, which left little to no room for encounters with the opposite sex.

it never bothered you before. until you moved to the night court and met the shadowsinger. azriel was beyond gorgeous and smart and funny and probably well-versed in the art of seduction, which is more than you could say for your inexperienced self.

"don't tease, az." you groaned, covering your face behind your hands. as if that would hide the flush spreading through your cheeks. "i'm already mortified enough as it is."

"hey," azriel said softly as he gently grabbed your wrists. "it's nothing to be embarrassed about, love."

"you're just saying that to be nice."

the shadowsinger shook his head. "i torture people for a living," he deadpanned. "i am not nice."

you chuckled, which brought a smile to azriel's handsome face. "besides, practice makes perfect. i've seen you go from not knowing how to hold a sword to perfecting the eight point attack in a matter of weeks. kissing should be a piece of cake compared to that."

"kissing and fighting aren't the same thing."

azriel smirked. "it is, if you're doing it right. all it takes is a good teacher." the tips of your ears reddened. “and we all know how fast of a learner you are.”

you snorted. "somehow i doubt that nesta would be into the idea of letting me borrow her mate for lessons." a little frown formed on your face. "or maybe she would. you never know with those two."

the idea formed in azriel's mind before he could think better of it. the shadowsinger hated that he thought of it in the first place, but fuck. you were both a little tipsy and a tiny bit reckless and he'd been crushing on you for far too long and maybe tonight was the night he finally did something about it.

"i could teach you."

you stilled. “what?”

azriel shrugged and put on his most nonchalant expression even though his inner monologue was currently pure turmoil. “i could teach you how to kiss.” he cleared his throat, lowering his gaze to yours. “it might help to practice with someone you’re comfortable with.”

you cocked your head, weighing his words. “you’re…actually serious about this.”

“why wouldn’t i be?”

“well, wouldn’t it make things weird? you’re my best friend. best friends don’t just kiss.”

you had him there. azriel certainly had never offered this unique service to any of his friends before. “i don’t think it’s weird. i think it makes perfect sense. in fact, it’s weird that we’re not kissing right now. best friends kiss all the time,” the shadowsinger deadpanned.

you snorted. “so you and cassian are just having heated little makeout sessions behind me and nesta’s back?”

azriel winked. “i won’t tell if you don’t.”

that earned an earnest little giggle out of you. then you were quiet again, lost in the pros and cons.

pro: you really wanted to kiss azriel.

con: you really wanted to kiss azriel.

what if you were horrible at it? what if you had bad breath? what if you accidentally bit him? what if azriel figured out that you had a pathetic little crush on him and he doesn’t return the feelings and your friendship implodes then you’d have to move back to the dawn court and adopt a bunch of cats just like thesan always teased you about when you were children—

“you’re spiraling.”

you crossed your arms. “am not.”

azriel rolled his eyes fondly. “i can practically see the steam coming out of your ears.” his expression softened as he turned over on the couch, his chin perched in one hand. “you don’t have to if you don’t want to. i just…” the bob of an adam’s apple. “i just wanted your first kiss to be with someone who genuinely cares about you.”

that turned your insides into mush. “oh.”

the shadowsinger’s cheeks reddened. “never mind, it sounds silly now that i’ve said it out loud.”

“it’s not,” you said, sitting cross legged on the sofa. “it’s not stupid, az. it’s really sweet, actually.”

your heart hammered inside of your chest as you faced azriel. his hazel eyes glowed golden under the faelights and a warm flush colored his cheeks a rosy tone. from this close, you could make out the constellations of freckles that kissed his nose and cheeks, its traitorous little trail stopping just above his cupid’s bow. you couldn’t help it. your gaze went straight to his lips. they looked soft, sensual, and perfectly kissable. you wondered if he’d taste like sweet wine.

“y/n?” azriel murmured softly.

“hmm?”

“you’re staring.”

your cheeks reddened and a slight smirk tugged at the corner of azriel’s mouth. “you’re the one who brought up kissing,” you countered, raising a brow. “now i can’t stop staring at your stupid lips.”

the shadowsinger’s smirk grew wider. “my stupid lips,” he repeated. “that you want to kiss.”

“no,” you blurted. azriel raised a knowing brow. “yes. maybe.” you shifted awkwardly. “what if i’m terrible at it? what if i accidentally miss? what if i don’t know where to put my hands? oh my gods, what if i accidentally bite you?”

to his credit, there wasn’t an ounce of judgement on azriel’s face. he’d witnessed your outbursts enough times that he wasn’t even fazed by it. the shadowsinger grabbed your hand and traced soothing circles over your knuckles. “one, no one’s first kiss is great. at best, it’s weird and awkward because you’re just trying to figure it out. that’s kind of the point. two, you won’t miss. just follow my lead. three, the neck or waist are generally safe spots to place your hands.” azriel demonstrated by wrapping your arms around his neck. “lastly, i don’t mind if you bite me. in fact, i might enjoy it.” he gave you a cheeky wink that helped dissipate the rest of your anxious worries.

you chuckled softly. leave it to azriel to make you laugh mid freak out. the shadowsinger smiled and cauldron fucking boil you, the sight of it pretty much sealed your fate.

“so,” you murmured, toying with the loose curls at the nape of azriel’s neck. “what now?”

“that’s entirely up to you, love.”

you blinked. once, twice. the smell of cedar and starkissed night. freckles and rosy cheeks. warm, golden eyes that melted your insides like honey. scarred hands that caressed the side of your face with heartbreaking gentleness.

“kiss me, azriel.”

the shadowsinger did not need to be told twice. he tilted your chin, brushing his nose against yours for a brief moment. azriel took a deep breath like he was savoring the moment, like his entire life had been leading up to this. then he kissed you.

his lips were as soft as freshly plucked rose petals and as sweet as the wine that still coated your tongue. they pressed against yours, gentle and exploring as azriel cupped your cheek. you leaned into him and your fingers found purchase in his silky, dark locks as azriel deepened the kiss. his arm snaked across your back as he pulled you into his lap, his mouth never once leaving yours. the sweet innocent pecks did not stay innocent for long.

the shadowsinger groaned as you nestled into him. there wasn’t an inch of your body that wasn’t pressed against him, but still you wanted more. your hands moves of their own accord and slipped underneath azriel’s cream sweater. his skin felt like a warm summer day despite the fact that it was currently the dead of winter.

“fuck,” azriel growled into your neck.

you pulled away, startled. it didn’t even occur to you that your fingers were as cold as icicles. “shit. sorry, az i didn’t think—“

you slipped your hands out of his sweater, but azriel caught you by the wrist. “no,” he grunted, his voice dark and low and dangerous. “no, don’t stop.”

it was the hottest thing you’ve ever heard in your entire life. even hotter still with the way azriel tugged you to him as though he’d rather die than have you stop touching him. you greedily obliged, taking the lead this time. azriel cursed under his breath as you kissed him again, tangling his curls between your fingers. there was something intoxicating about him—his taste, his touch, his kiss. you couldn’t get enough.

when you finally came up for breath, the shadowsinger looked at you as though he’d been starving for centuries and you’d only really begun to scratch the surface of his hunger. azriel wanted to devour you.

but tonight, he’d settle for a kiss. except, it was anything but.

azriel was fucked.

he blinked, drinking in your lust added gaze and flushed cheeks. you brought your bottom lip between your teeth and it was all he could do to reel himself in. “are…are all first kisses like that?” your voice was hoarse from disuse and utterly sexy.

“no,” azriel answered honestly. “i’ve never had a kiss like that.”

your grin brought out a set of dimples that azriel had long ago deemed as his greatest weaknesses. “and i’ve never had a first kiss, period.”

and you never will again, azriel thought. not if he could help it.

“does that feel good, love?” azriel asked as he pressed a kiss against your collar bone.

you whimpered as his lips trailed between the valley of your breasts. since that first kiss, you and azriel hadn’t been able to keep your hands off of each other. over the last few weeks, the apprehension you felt about your inexperience slowly started to feel like a blessing in disguise. azriel said you were a fast learner, but only because he was such a great teacher.

“gods,” you breathed, clutching the sheets as azriel continued his descent.

“you can just call me az, you know.”

you rolled your eyes at the cheeky male below you. from this angle, he certainly looked like a god. his hair was a tousled mess, dark curls tangled from where you ran your fingers through it. sweat dripped down his shirtless torso, his golden brown skin glowing in the afternoon light. you were vaguely aware that the sun as setting over the horizon, which meant that the rest of your friends would be arriving for dinner, but neither one of you seemed to care.

during the past few weeks, you and azriel continued your lessons. first base was easy enough to master. the two of you put in plenty of hours sneaking off to make out in azriel’s room, the wine cellar, the training pits, and even in feyre’s art studio at the river house once when things really got desperate. it was a wonder that your friends hadn’t caught you yet. there had been several close calls with cassian. mostly because the male was a nosy busybody.

second base took a little more work. you were terrified at first. you and azriel had been making out in your bed for what seemed like hours before you finally mustered up the courage to slip your hand into his trousers. the shadowsinger made a sound that was half growl and half purr and for a split second you were afraid that you’d hurt him. when you voiced your fears, azriel was quick to reassure you.

“i’m not in pain, love.” azriel said, his voice strained and breathy. “trust me, i feel the complete opposite.”

“tell me how to make you feel good, az.”

the string of curse words that fell from his lips were so filthy that it made you blush. the shadowsinger guided your hand over his cock and you nearly gasped at the impressive length. azriel was hot and hard beneath your touch, his wings flexing as you grasped him in your hand.

“loosen your grip, love.” azriel adjusted your hand, motioning for your fingers to relax and mold against him. you mimicked his movement, eliciting a low rumble out of the shadowsinger. the competitive part of you awakened, eager to make azriel groan like that again. you gazed up at azriel through your lashes with determination. “gods, don’t look at me like that y/n or this lesson will be over before it’s even started.”

heat erupted in your core, but you shook the desire away. this was about azriel. you wanted to make him come undone for once instead of the other way around. “show me, az.” you said. “i want to see how you touch yourself.”

“cauldron boil me,” azriel muttered under his breath. “you’re going to be the death of me, y/n.”

you watched as he gripped himself and pumped at a steady pace. he slowed down the movements for you and you studied each flick of his wrist as though you’d be tested on it later. as sinful as it was, there was something heavenly about watching azriel stroke himself. your hands itched to touch him. once you felt confident enough, azriel let you take over.

azriel’s eyes rolled back as you pumped his shaft, carefully watching the rise and fall of his chest. his heavy breathing filled the room and it quickly became your favorite sound in the world.

you felt a strange rush of power witnessing azriel in such a vulnerable state. his lids were heavy with lust, golden eyes barely visible from the ring of onyx swallowing up his irises. you thought he looked pretty like this, his head tilted back against your headboard while his lips parted to release a shallow breath every now and then.

"you have no idea how good that feels, love." azriel grunted. you tightened your grip, spreading the bead of precum over his tip. your little improvisation was met with a moan that seeped into your bones.

"how good, az?" you teased.

those long lashes of his kissed the tops of his cheeks as his eyes fluttered close. "fucking amazing," azriel declared. "keep going, love. don't stop, please. gods—"

"you can just call me y/n, you know."

azriel growled in response before pulling you in for a heated kiss. his hips thrust up to match your pace as his tongue parted your lips. he swallowed your moans, devouring you like his life depended on it.

“just like that, love.” azriel said in appreciation. “you’re doing such a good job, y/n.”

the praise affected you more than you thought it would. you were always seeking positive feedback when it came to your work, especially in training, but this was something else. it only encouraged you to keep going at a faster pace until azriel was coming undone in your hands. the sight of him losing control would forever be etched in your mind.

the more azriel gave, the more you craved. not just physically, but mentally and emotionally as well. the whole thing may have started as a practical way to tackle sex, but as time went on, it started to evolve into something else entirely.

until the lessons weren’t really just lessons anymore.

if you had to pinpoint the moment when everything changed, it would have been a few days after winter solstice. azriel had been away for a mission and was unable to make it home for the festivities. throughout the night, you kept finding yourself fidgeting and glancing at the empty seat beside you. at one point during dinner, cassian squeezed your hand and smiled sadly.

“i’m sure he misses you too, y/n.”

the gravity of those words hit you full force when you found azriel standing in the doorway of your flat. he was still dressed in his combat leathers and dark circles formed underneath his eyes as though he’d flown nonstop from wherever he was to get back home. before you could stop yourself, you rushed at him and nearly knocked him into the street from the force of your hug.

“i know, love.” azriel murmured softly into your hair. “i missed you, too.”

one bath and two cups of hot chocolate later, you found yourself curled up on the sofa as snow fell softly against the windowpane. you set your drink down on the table and turned to face azriel.

“so, i was thinking…”

the corner of azriel’s mouth quirked. “that’s never good.”

you tossed a pillow at him and rolled your eyes. “i was thinking that maybe it’s my turn to teach you a lesson, for once.”

the shadowsinger looked intrigued by that. “oh yeah? and what do you want to teach me, love?”

“i’m going to teach you how to sleep, az.” you pointedly stared at his bruised eyes, which only made him chuckle in amusement. “because judging from those bags underneath your eyes, you’re no expert in the matter.”

“i don’t get a say in this, do i?” shadows peered over his shoulders as though they too yearned for rest.

“nope,” you said cheerfully, dragging him off the couch and into your bedroom.

azriel let you bully him into getting underneath the covers. he tucked his wings to the side as he faced you. “what’s so great about this thing you call sleep, then? seems pretty boring to me.”

“well if you’d let me demonstrate,” you said impatiently before tugging him towards you. azriel chuckled and scooted closer. “i’ll have you know i’m a world class cuddler.”

“yeah? prove it then, love.” azriel teased.

the shadowsinger watched in amusement as you bossed him around. first you made him lie on his stomach and then pulled him to your chest. as much as he enjoyed teasing the absolute hell out of you, he couldn’t help but murmur in satisfaction as he rested his head in the crook of your neck. even his shadows seemed to enjoy bathing in your warmth and breathing in your jasmine shampoo.

“mmm,” az mumbled sleepily. for the first time in gods knew how long, he felt warm and safe and content. “you’re bossy as hell, but comfy too.”

“i know, you stubborn giant bat baby.”

the shadowsinger snorted. “giant bat baby?”

you rolled your eyes fondly. “shut up and cuddle, az.”

azriel burrowed himself further until his body heat warmed every inch of your skin. “that’s the good stuff,” he declared, brushing a soft kiss against your collarbone.

“told you i was good,” you said with a smile. azriel couldn’t even argue. with your hands massaging his scalp and your legs intertwined with his, the shadowsinger would’ve agree to anything you said.

“the best,” he hummed against your skin.

this was dangerous territory. with your other lessons, it was easy to shove aside your feelings because pleasure made it hard to think about anything else. but with azriel laying on your chest and clinging onto you like this meant something more…you could no longer avoid that pesky voice of doubt.

you were in love with azriel.

you had been for a long time.

shit.

“y/n?” azriel asked, cutting through the turmoil of your thoughts. his wings draped over the sides of your bed, relaxed and at ease.

“yeah?”

his golden eyes found yours in the dark. for a second, he stared at you like he was trying to commit every detail to memory. the shadowsinger opened his mouth like he was going to say something important, but he gave a tiny shake of his head and smiled.

“good night, love.”

in that moment, you knew azriel had your heart in the palm of his hand. “good night, az.”

azriel knew it was only a matter of time before these lessons came back to bite him on the ass.

he had been so eager that first night. mostly because he'd had a crush on you for so long and it was finally time to do something about it. the shadowsinger knew that he probably should've just told you how he felt, but he didn't want to shatter this delicate thing between you.

after all, these were just lessons. for all he knew, he was just your practice partner. it wasn't really all that different from sparring. except your weapons where your lips and your hands and your fucking smile that made his heart skip a beat every time you so much as grinned at him from across the room.

gods, he was so fucked.

the reality of it didn't fully hit him until that disastrous spring night.

the two of you had perfected third base eons ago. azriel knew how to make you cum with his mouth using a combination of expert tongue flicks and help from his shadows. nothing brought him joy like your shaking legs greedily wrapping around him as he ate your pussy like a man starved.

azriel thought he found the key to happiness until you returned the favor and went down on him.

finding restraint was hard. reeling his desire in while you knelt before him with your lips wrapped around his cock was nearly impossible.

"like this?" you asked, licking a stripe along the underside of his cock. azriel thought he was going to come right then and there when you looked up at him through your lashes, determination burning in your gaze.

you had always been intense. azriel knew that much from months of training together, but he didn't expect you to approach sex with the same competitiveness. you put your all into everything you did, which is what made azriel fall for you in the first place. he just didn't think you'd take the same approach when it came to sucking his dick. not that he was complaining.

in fact, all he could really do was moan.

the shadowsinger attempted to pull it together long enough to utter a coherent sentence. he had to at least attempt to say something helpful. you were putting your trust in him. he liked knowing that he'd been your first everything. now he just had to muster up the courage to tell you that he also intended to be the last.

he tried. he really did.

that night in his room. laying in bed with your legs tangled together. the soft spring breeze billowing through your curtains. azriel watched as you propped yourself up on your elbows and turned towards him.

"so, what now?" you asked.

azriel's brows furrowed with confusion. "what do you mean, love?"

you tilted your head, biting down on your bottom lip as you mulled over what to say next. it was one of your many little quirks that azriel adored. "i mean, what happens now? we've pretty much covered all the bases. except for one."

sex. you hadn't had sex yet. azriel knew this would come up sooner or later, but he had hoped it would be the latter. while it was easy to pretend that the lessons were just lessons to him, azriel couldn't do that with sex. it had always been hard for him to separate his feelings from the physical act and as much as he wanted to make sure that your first experience would be with someone who loved you, it wouldn't be fair to have sex without telling you the truth.

"i don't think that would be a good idea." as soon as the words left his mouth, azriel knew it was the wrong thing to say. he could tell that much from the look on your face. "i just mean, we shouldn't rush into anything."

"rush?" you asked incredulously. "azriel, we've spent the last three months doing anything and everything under the sun except sex."

"and it's been great," azriel said, trying to reel the conversation back in. "the lessons. trusting each other. but i just think you should take a step back and consider if you're truly ready."

that intense gaze he loved so much suddenly felt like the sweltering sun that azriel couldn't wait to shy away from. "you were my first kiss, az. my first everything. i think i've made it pretty clear on where i stand." you paused for a second, scanning his face. "oh my gods. i didn't even think to ask if you wanted this."

you were up before the absurdity of that statement could sink into azriel. if he wanted this? he'd never wanted anything more in his entire life.

"they were just lessons," you murmured to yourself while gathering your clothes. “how could i be so stupid?”

"y/n, please." azriel pleaded, not entirely believing what he was hearing. he nearly tripped over his own bedsheets as he followed you across the room.

“no, az. i’m sorry, i thought—“ your eyes brimmed with tears. the sight broke his fucking heart. “it’s not your fault. i just assumed—“

“that i’m in love with you?” azriel asked, gently gripping your wrists. you froze, wide eyes pinning azriel in place. “because i am, you know. i’ve been in love with you since the moment we met. this past few months, it’s killed me to pretend that whatever this is between us is just lessons.”

your gaze softened. “why didn’t you ever say anything?”

azriel chuckled bitterly. “because i’m a coward. i was scared that you might not feel the same way, so i settled for whatever scraps you were willing to give me.”

tears filled your eyes again and azriel was scared he’d fucked it up again, but you wiped your cheeks and cupped his face. “you deserve more than that, azriel.”

“i know, love.” he bowed his head. “and you deserve more than just lessons. that’s why i don’t want to have sex. not unless you know what this means to me. if we do this, there will be no one else. not today, not ever. i may be your first, but i also intend to be your last. if you’ll let me.”

a stray tear fell down your cheek, but it was a happy one this time. “if you haven’t noticed, i’m totally crazy about you, az. i think i’ve been in love with you longer than i wanted to admit.”

“can’t blame you,” the shadowsinger said. “i’m totally lovable.”

you smacked him in the chest, but azriel only laughed before he kissed you. really kissed you. it felt like you were floating on air.

gods, you loved him. you really did.

you smiled into the kiss. “i love you, az.”

the shadowsinger kissed the tip of your nose. “i love you too, y/n.”

“so…no more lessons, right?”

azriel shook his head and scooped you into his arms. “no more lessons. i want the real thing this time.”

#friends and family we are gathered here today to fucking YEARN #i missed az and i m back with a bang #azriel #azriel acotar #azriel fic #azriel smut #azriel fluff #azriel shadowsinger #azriel x you #azriel x reader #azriel fanfic #acotar

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inkedbybarnes · 10 months ago

Text

well and perfect

bucky barnes x fem!reader

summary: bucky has a surprise for your birthday.

words: 2.3k

warnings: 18+ minors dni. a lotta fluff, but what's new... mentions of insecurity and anxiety if you blink, bucky being a sweetheart that i wish existed, slighteeest hint of implied smut if you blink, usage of petnames such as baby, doll, and sweetheart, lowercase writing.

a request from the lovely @brnesblogposts. happiest 21st birthday to you! i am sorry it took quite long, so i hope i am not late. i tried to write it in a way that would keep it general but sweet, since i don't know much about the reader celebrating and wanted to cater for more people. i hope you like this one and that you have the best birthday ever. thank you for requesting! 🩷

dividers by @cafekitsune!

comments, reblogs, and likes are highly appreciated! thank you. ♡

“where are you taking me, james?”

only a few specks of light peeked through the piece of cloth that bucky had over your eyes. his argument was that it will keep you and your curiosity away from figuring out his so-called surprise for your birthday.

“it wouldn't be much of a surprise if i answer you, doll.” he chuckled, his fingers brushing your thigh briefly as he drove to this mysterious location.

“but is it really necessary to have me blindfolded?" you complained, tempted to take a peek. “i wanna see you. this isn't fair.”

“nah uh, you're trying to be all cute for me and it's not going to work this time. we're almost there. be patient,” he said, his hand now finding its way up to yours. “keep it on and i swear it'll be worth it. at least, i hope it will.”

you sensed his doubts and worries right away, feeling bad for pressuring him when all he did was make you feel special since you woke up this morning. from bringing you the breakfast in bed of your dreams to showering you with gifts you forgot you mentioned but he completely remembered. oh, and don't forget the cake... the perfect cake you've been drooling over for months!

you assume that you've already been to the place or know the way to it, hence why he had to keep you entirely clueless during the entire ride. not wanting to make him even more nervous, you decided to give up.

“okay, okay. i'll be good and cooperate, i promise.” you squeezed his hand, carefully leaning toward his side to give him a kiss on the cheek, which was a brave decision considering that you were literally blindfolded. “buuut, am i allowed to sing your ears off until we get there?”

“when were you never allowed?” his hand left yours for a moment to turn on the radio, connecting his phone to its bluetooth feature (he thanked technology for that one) and letting the playlist you made play through the speakers. “i know you're bored. so, sing away, sweetheart.”

the car stopped and probably along with your heart. you knew that this was it. you were finally here, wherever here was, and excitement was an understatement. however, you stayed calm and waited for bucky's confirmation first before reacting.

“i can basically hear your insides shouting,” bucky said as you hear the car door opening. “we're here, baby.”

yes!

“can i take it off now?” you asked quickly. “please, please?”

the car door opened at your side, the rough yet warm chuckle of bucky letting you know he was right beside you. “alright, take 'em off.”

not waiting for another second, you grabbed the cloth away from your eyes and scanned the area. although it took you a few minutes to figure it out, you knew where you were.

“oh my god, we're in brooklyn?” you asked with a gasp, but even more excited now that you were in one of bucky's favourite places in the world.

“yeah, is that okay? i knew you wanted me to give you a better tour around brooklyn, so here it is.” he pressed his fingers into his nape, worried that you might find the entire idea out of place or unfitting for the occasion. “i would've thrown you a party like the team suggested, but i don't.. i don't know how that works yet. i'm not really good at whatever people do for celebrations these days, so i wanted to show you the way i knew it back then but i'm suddenly not sure if you'd like it.”

you could basically hear your heart break as he tried to explain. it hasn't been that long since he had been away from wakanda and pardoned by the government, so he hasn't fully adjusted with the changes that the current generation had. while bucky never paid attention in terms of fitting in, he wanted to fit in your life. little does he know that nobody else could be a better fit.

“no. stop that, bucky. look at me.” you hopped off the car, closing the distance between the two of you. “does it look like i'm sad? disappointed? anything relatively negative?" he shook his head. “exactly, because i'm so excited for what you have planned. you barely even started and i feel like i already won the lottery. so stop worrying, please?”

“i just don't want you to think that i'm being selfish. it's your birthday, you know? it should be about you, but here i am taking you to a place where i grew up in and has nothing to do with you,” he said, his anxiety and insecurity taking over. “but i really thought about this and i.. i just want you to be a part of all of me, even if we were basically from different times. i want you to know that if we were to meet back then, i'd fall for you the same way if not harder, and this is exactly how i'd show you.”

timeless love and devotion.

that was his gift and he thought he was being selfish.

and if it was possible to burst, you probably would've. he didn't even realise how priceless his gift was compared to anything you could've asked for, and yet he felt like he was failing you.

“i love you. so, so much. you know that, right?” you reassured him first, and when he nodded you continued. “i would've enjoyed a party, sure. anything from you would be perfect for me, but a party would most likely just give me a few days of happiness, maybe a memorable memory too, but this.. what you're giving me will last me a lifetime. you don't understand how big this is for me and here you are thinking that you're failing me.”

“i'm not?” he asked, lost in the battle he had within his mind.

“short answer? you basically made me fall in love with you again.”

“really?" his eyes twinkled, as if he was a child being complimented for his scribbles.

you let out a giggle before answering. “yes, now can we start my birthday tour? you made me wait all day, barnes.”

“well, that's no good. can't have my birthday girl waiting," he said, finally smiling. “this way, gorgeous.”

you spent the entire day visiting his favourite spots. although most of them were already replaced with something else, he still made sure to tell you the stories behind them and how they mattered to him, as well as a few playful scenarios he made that included you and young bucky if you were in the 40s.

he then took you to a restaurant he found fancy and expensive back then, telling you that he remembered saying to himself that he'd only bring a special girl to the restaurant and make her feel special. not being able to help it, you asked if he ever brought a girl there back then.

you were the first one, and he knew you were his last.

on your way to the movie theatre, he didn't forget to show you the alley where he'd always find steve in trouble. you both even took a picture in it to show the team, especially steve, when you get home.

“i feel like a teenager again.”

bucky sat beside you at one of the oldest theatres in brooklyn, the same one bucky used to visit back in the 40s, to watch a movie you've been wanting to see. it was a surprise that it was still up and running, but with its history now being connected to the famous steve rogers and bucky barnes, it was easily a tourist spot.

“you're 107 years old, james. i think you're quite past that stage already.” you reminded him which earned you a sharp glance and a pout.

“what i mean is, this is exactly how i imagined i'd take you out back then. you know, asking you to dinner, going to the theatre to watch a movie we'd completely ignore because i'll be too busy distracting you—”

“distracting me, huh?” you asked, even more intrigued. “how exactly would you distract me? what if i'm really interested in the movie?”

“did i really say that? god, i'm even recklessly acting like a teenager as well.” you watched his cheeks turn into a shade of pink. you raised a brow, prompting him to explain further. “it's dark and we're really close. after all the time and tension we've spent before coming here, i would be desperate to kiss you.”

“james buchanan barnes!” you gasped, a fake and exaggerated one. “those are some bad thoughts you're having, and i thought you were a gentleman.”

“i am, i am!” he exclaimed, failing to hear the playful tone to your words. “i wouldn't even do anything beyond holding someone's hands back then. my ma would put me in a cage if i did anything reckless," he said, shaking his head with a smile at the memory of his mom. “but i played this scenario a thousand times in my head already ever since i met you. i just know you would've made me crazy for you, and you still do.”

you looked into his cool blue eyes, getting lost in them in silence while imagining what your life could've been with him back in the 40s. would've it been different? would've it lasted? would've it been a possibility? is that what he hoped he had?

“you got quiet.” he noticed. “what's going inside that pretty head?”

“you.”

“well, i'm honoured.” he grinned. “tell me about it.”

“i'm just thinking about how it would've been like back then,” you answered. “i kinda wish we met sooner. i think that's what you have wanted instead.”

“you're all that i ever wanted. not the time, not the place, but the person,” he said, kissing your fingers before linking yours and his together. “we may not have met earlier, but i was meant to end up with you. i probably had to go through everything.. that happened, because there was something amazing waiting for me in the end.”

“oh, bucky. don't say that. you deserved none of that. you don't have to go through anything to have me.”

“but it's true, you made it all worth it,” he shrugged. “if i had to go through all of that nightmare again, i would do it in a heartbeat if i'll wake up to this reality.”

“god, you make it impossible for me not to cry.” you sniffed, feeling the dam break at his words. “thank you. not just for this day, but for everything. i wish i could do more to let you know that i love you so much.”

“i love you even more. you're already doing more than i deserve, baby.” he kissed your tears away, then your forehead. “don't cry, that wasn't my plan for your birthday.”

“it's your fault for being so fucking perfect.” you hit his chest softly. “now i am never letting you go.”

“i already made the same decision the moment you told me your name. now, come here.” he pulled you into a hug, letting you cry in his embrace until you notice the silence around you. you looked around and noticed the empty theatre, as well as the rolling credits on the big screen.

“we watched nothing from the movie! they all left!”

“okay, i am definitely guilty for that one. i did say i was going to distract you. i promise to get us another ticket tomorrow and have no distractions.” he laughed, standing up to his feet and offering his hand to you. “let's go? i booked us a room, and i heard their room service is amazing.”

you took his hand and smoothed out your clothes. “something tells me the room service comes exactly from you.”

“oh, i don't know...” he had a sinister smile on his face as you both walked out of the theatre. “you gotta try to find out.”

you walked hand in hand to the hotel, liking the idea of enjoying the night sky of brooklyn than taking a cab, especially if the hotel wasn't that far away.

all was well and perfect until you felt a cold drop of water land on your cheek.

“wait, is that...” before you could finish your sentence, a downpour suddenly erupted, instantly wetting you both.

“it's raining!” you exclaimed, finding the situation amusing than a way to dampen your mood, remembering how much you adored the rain and the idea of being underneath it with someone you love. “you know, i actually dreamt of being—”

bucky suddenly pulled you close, kissing you under the rain. through your soaked clothes and the raindrops that trickled down your face, he can feel your warm and soft lips pressed against his. it was a perfect moment as the rain continued to pour down, leaving you both soaked, but content.

“wow,” you whispered after. “it was always in my bucket list to get kissed under the rain.”

“i know, i remember.”

your heart skipped a beat. “you remember everything, don't you?”

“everything about you, i do.” he wiped the streaks of rain around your eyes, then down to your lips. “are you happy?”

“so, so happy. you have no idea," you answered, sighing in contentment while your body was pressed against his. “i'm at a point where i feel like none of this is real.”

“believe it, because you have to get used to it.” he smiled, leaning for another kiss. “happy birthday, sweetheart.”

all was indeed well and perfect.

if you have any requests for bucky, send them my way! 💌

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky x reader #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes x fem!reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes imagine #inkedbybarnes

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glasvera · 24 days ago

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Adornment

Adam Warlock x GN!Reader

Description: You enjoy a peaceful, private moment with your boyfriend and develop a newfound appreciation for gold in the process.

Warnings/Disclaimers: Smoochies? Nothing, really. I mean, Adam's in a speedo I guess but you'll just have to imagine that. This is alllll fluff.

A/N: There's no way I'm going to keep up posting like this long term, but my gods am I going to ride this Golden Boy high while it lasts.

Word Count: 850

You never were much of a gold person.

Silver always seemed to compliment you better. Sure, you'd had a few gold pieces here and there, gifts from family and past lovers, but it had never been your favorite.

It just never suited you.

Now, as you find yourself dragged along the beach by your rather excited boyfriend who only took the time to grab your wrist, you think you might understand the appeal. Those golden fingers of his look terribly lovely on your arm.

Maybe it's the way he glitters, not just because of his golden skin, but as a person. His very soul shines so brilliantly it almost blinds you. You stumble a bit in the loose sand, lost in thought as you are, and he’s quick to catch you and steady you. He is nothing but love, sweet, syrupy, and suffocating in the best way.

And when he smiles? Oh… the very warmth of it could rival the glory of the sun itself.

Of course he attracts the attention of everyone around you no matter where you go. Especially dressed as he is here, in his shiny new red and gold speedo, it’s hard not to look at him. It honestly fills you with a sense of pride, knowing that the perfect man chose you out of anyone in every universe.

When he finally stops at the top of a hill, overlooking the water as the sun sets slowly down amidst vibrant hues of orange and magenta, your breath catches. Of course you had caught glimpses of it as he led you up here, but you had been so distracted then… and it truly is beautiful. The scene is framed by palm trees that grow at the base of the hill, and the surrounding area is secluded with nary a soul to disturb you. He stands behind you, wrapping his arms around you like a beautiful golden scarf as he nuzzles his face into your hair.

“It's wonderful…” you breathe, relaxing in the warmth of his arms.

You can feel him smiling when his arms lower to wrap around your waist and he moves to bury his nose into the crook of your neck. And you can feel the warm, tingling sensation that flutters across your skin when he presses a gentle kiss there.

“Just like you,” he hums.

A chortle thrums in your chest, and you take a moment to look down at where those strong arms hug you tightly. Your own personal, living golden corset. It reflects the setting sun onto your skin, bathing you in delicate patterns of warm light.

“If anyone around here is reminiscent of the golden sun, I'm pretty sure it's you,” you tease lightheartedly. Your cheek presses against the silky hair that tickles your face.

His chuckle vibrates against your skin. “I think gold is much more becoming on you, my love.”

Something about those words makes your heart flutter. Your face presses more insistently against his head and he takes the hint, lifting his head just enough to press his lips to yours as you crane your neck towards him. Soon after you turn to face him properly, still caged in those strong arms of his as yours come to rest around his neck. He's so warm, so full of life and love that he is eager to show you while his lips part and mold against yours.

He lowers the two of you to the ground, sinking into the soft sand as he hovers over you. One arm remains wrapped tightly around the small of your back while his other hand comes to rest at your hip. You can’t help but hum contentedly as he kisses you again, and your fingers find their way into his perfectly soft golden locks. No one else, nothing in the world matters to either of you in this moment. Lips press upon lips just as readily as skin meets skin, and breathy sighs blend with the sounds of waves as they lap upon the shore. You could stay like this forever.

When you break apart, staring into those dazed, pearly eyes of his, you smile softly. He tilts his head to the side curiously while his thumb traces tiny circles into your lower back. The entirety of his face is bathed in the reds and purples from the sky above you, and part of you thinks that might just be prettier than any sunset you'll ever see. Unbeknownst to you, he can see the way those colors bounce off of him and onto you, scattering across your flushed face and complimenting the warmth that radiates off of you. It nearly takes his breath away.

“I think I'm starting to agree with that,” you say finally, lowering one hand to gesture at his arm before you trace your fingers along his bicep. “I quite like gold on me now.”

A lazy smile draws upon his face, giving it that dazzling brilliance once more, and he presses a gentle kiss to your forehead. “I will gladly adorn you any time you wish.”

#adam warlock #marvel rivals #adam warlock x reader #marvel rivals x reader #marvel rivals fanfic #adam warlock fanfic #if adam warlock has 0 fans i am dead #glasvera writes #glasvera ridiculously pines over fictional character no 345

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seokiesprettygirl · 6 months ago

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Kim Fucking Namjoon | KNJ

Please proceed with caution. This is a 18+ nsfw piece. I won’t spoil anything here. Had this in my head since I saw those pics from Hoseoks party. Haven’t spelled checked and haven’t written like this in ages so I hope it makes sense and is good enough!

‘You are out of your mind! You know exactly who will be at that party. I am not going!’ You answered your best friend sitting on your bed whilst she was going through your wardrobe.

‘Please, please I am begging you! You know Hoseok invited me? He called me and made sure I will be there! What if tonight is the night?!’ Yu-jin pouted at you, with a begging hands.

‘What do you even mean THE night?’ You rolled your eyes at her and threw yourself back at the bed.

‘What if he kisses me tonight? What if he finally makes a move and I won’t be there because you won’t go!’ Her voice was really desperate and she was trying to hide all of the excitement she was holding inside.

‘You can still go! Just without me. I wasn’t invited, I was supposed to be your plus one anyway’ you answered sighing loudly. You wanted to go, but you also knew who you could bump into at this party. The guy who you worked with few times and who also happens to be a best friend of your best friends crush. Its not that you hated him. But you definitely weren’t fond of him and wanted to avoid him. The man was trouble. Every time you had to work together he would come up with excuses or would refuse to cooperate. He was always late and he just simply annoyed the fuck out of you. Luckily the feeling was mutual. Because Hoseok told Yu-jin that he wasn’t keen on you either.

Kim Namjoon. Tall, incredibly wide shoulders and dark hair. Smoky, sleepy dark eyes and the perfect jaw line. Perfect looks, yet so fucking annoying.

‘Please, please. I promise I will keep you away from him and I won’t leave you on your own for too long’ she was about to say she won’t leave you at all but you both knew that it won’t be the case. Because the second Hoseok will wave at her she will run and leave you behind. And you couldn’t blame her. He was really good looking, he was successful and he did treat her really well. There was never a game that he would play with her. His intentions were pretty clear to everyone.

You rolled your eyes and sat back up on the bed.

‘Fine…’ you decided. Why would you avoid a great party, a little boogie and a drink because this jerk might be there? And even if he is, its not like he will come to harass you. It will be fine. If you will have to converse you will be civil. You bet he will be late anyway, like he always was.

‘I love love looooooove you’ Yu-jin jumped on you and tackled you down onto the bed ‘You are the best’ she giggled right into your face. You and Yu-jin have been friends for years, pretty much since school. You never left each others sides, even with careers going on and moving out of your family homes you were always there for each other. Even when her dad passed, you took care of their family and helped cook for them for few months. You were inseparable so it was natural for Yu-jin wanting to be on a very important party of her probably future boyfriend. Maybe even husband.

‘Pick my outfit though’ you moaned and pushed her off yourself. She sprang up to your wardrobe and she already had eyed out black dress with long sleeves and pair of sneakers paired with it. It was the cool kind of outfit you could never pick yourself but she was a master in this. She was the cool stylish one who would buy and gift you tons of stuff that she knew you could pull off but were too scared to experiment yourself.

You both arrived in front of the building and got out of the car. You have straightened your dress and fixed your hair. Both of you checked your make up and were ready to go in.

You have showed your invitation at the door and went on the top floor of the building in the lift. You were nervous. Yu-jin was excited. As always the absolute opposites. You took a deep breath as the lift reached the top floor, the door dinged and you could heard loud music already blasting. Yu-jin left first and you followed her, another person asked for the invitations which you both showed and received a bracelet to be let in. It was long until you heard the man squeak and run towards the two of you. His hair done wet like style, denim outfit, chunky shoes and shades. He did look like a king of this party.

‘Its so good to see you both! So glad you made it! Yu-jin, you look so good baby’ he commented on her looks. He always showered her in compliments and it was great to see her being treasured. ‘You both do. Thank you so much for coming. Cocktails are on this side, snacks on the other. Yu-jin I will grab you in a bit okay? I need to welcome all the guests. Get yourself a drink and I will be right with you okay?’ He was so reassuring, made sure she felt special and taken care if. She nodded and smiled widely at him. He always took her words away, she was so stunned around him, so shy. Not the Yu-jin you know. You both swiftly moved away to the cocktail bar. You scanned the room to see if there was anyone who you known. There were few people that you knew of. No sight of him. Thank fuck. You ordered your cocktail, and as you were just chatting to the bartender and then Yu-jin patted your shoulder.

‘Im so sorry..’ she whispered and you knew what was coming. But just as you promised yourself at home, you wouldn’t let this spoil your night. You were here for Hoseok and your friend and a little bit of good time. You turned around and then he was, at the entrance that you and Yu-jin just were few minutes ago. Top to bottom dark jeans, oversized t-shirt, long hair dark hair. Slightly overgrown. He was talking to Hoseok and scanned the room himself. He stopped at you. Your eyes locked for just a second. Fuck. You were hoping to go by unnoticed.

There she is. He thought already annoyed at your sight. Fuck, she will be as annoying as always he thought to himself.

He moved away from Hoseok and moved towards a group of men standing on the side. He didn’t break the eye contact though. He was still staring at you. And you couldn’t let him win. He made you so competitive. Fuck he is so annoying even from so far away. You rolled your eyes and turned around back to the bar. You took a big sip of your cocktail.

‘Its fine Yu-jin, we both knew this is going to happen’ you said to your friend and continued on sipping on your drink. You definitely needed liquid courage to be able to walk about and dance on this party, in the outfit you were in, in front of a guy you really disliked. You moved along with the drink and your friend and she spotted few people she knew and wanted to say hello to. And all you could feel was his eyes on you. Even when you weren’t facing him, you could just feel him staring. It was uncomfortable but at the same time it has given you this weird confidence.

Eventually Hoseok came and grabbed Yu-jin as he promised and he basically didn’t leave her side the entire night. They would go up together to different people and he would introduce her. They did disappear at some point completely, you lost them and panicked a little. She promised not to leave you for good and as you were turning around to look for her, you were stopped by him.

Kim Namjoon. Fuck. He appeared right in front of you. Out of no where.

‘Nice to see you’ he hissed through his clenched jaw. You could hear his teeth grind. Why is he here and talking to you. You thought it was obvious to avoid each other and maybe pretend you don’t know each other at all. Why was he polite? You weren’t buying his bullshit.

‘Im afraid im not able to say the same’ you looked down on him. You took another sip of your drink for extra courage. No way he is going to spoil your night.

‘As polite as always I see’ he hissed back and moved away. He went around you and ordered a drink from the bartender. Of course, he couldn’t avoid you because you were stuck like a leech to the bar. You grabbed your drink and moved away. It didn’t take long and someone approached you. Also quite tall. Piercing in his lip, tattoos on his arm. Dark clothes, thick chain around his neck, drink in his hand.

‘I was told to take care of you’ he whispered to your ear. You froze. What the hell?

‘Who are you and who told you that?’ You were surprised, it wasn’t him so you weren’t completely closed off to talk to anyone else. Anyone but him.

‘Yu-jin told me to hang around for a bit. Her and Hoseok went.. to his studio. I think he will finally make things official’ you were stunned. Who is this guy. He was nice and sweet and he knew details about your friend. Wait Yu-jin told him what? ‘Jungkook’ he added at the end. Jungkook. Jungkook. You tried to remember if she ever mentioned anyone with that name. He put his hand on your waist. You froze again. ‘i was supposed to keep Namjoon away’ he added. Yu-jin im going to kill you, you thought to yourself but you were happy to take any help at this stage. You turned around to him, keeping his hand on your waist and smiled politely.

‘I see. I also see you have been let in on all my secrets’ you chuckled and continued on your cocktail.

At that very second, when you were chuckling whilst Jungkook hand was resting on your waist Kim Namjoon has turned around from the bar to look around. Scanned the room and saw exactly that picture. He clenched his jaw and squeezed his drink a little bit too hard, he broke the glass and spilled the whiskey that was in it. It didn’t look like he hurt himself. He apologised to the bartender and ordered another drink. You noticed in the corner of your eye that he was still staring. It didn’t take long for him to approach. Of course, he couldn’t stay the fuck away could he?

‘Jungkookie, i didnt know you had a date’ he chuckled at the sight of the two of you.

‘I don’t have to tell you everything do I?’ He answered and grabbed you a little closer. You were staring at Namjoon, and he was staring staring at you. The surroundings became unbearable and steamy.

‘I didn’t know you knew each other’ you gasped and wrapped yourself around Jungkook. He wasn’t expecting that so he smirked a little when he felt your body getting closer to his. Namjoons jaw clenched again.

‘For years now’ he answered and scanned you and Jungkook up and down. He knew. He smelled it. He found out this was only a play. If Jungkook didnt smirk with a triumph like that maybe he would have been fooled. ‘Enjoy you two’ he raised his glass slightly and moved away. You could have breathing again, so you exhaled loudly.

‘What the fuck is wrong with the two of you? You really do hate each other’ Jungkook commented, partially amused at the situation and sipped on his drink. The music stopped and Hoseok appeared around the main area of the party. All lights on him.

‘Thank you for coming everyone. We will play few songs from the new album now. I hope you enjoy’ he bowed down and he went away. The music started, the lights went off again. And you felt really warm. Incredibly warm. You needed a breath of fresh air or water at your neck. You looked around and spotted a corridor leading to the bathrooms. You started walking towards it. As you started moving, you felt a pair of eyes on you. And after that movement in the corner of your eye. You rushed towards the bathrooms, closed the first door behind you and you could hear the steps behind you. You entered the bathroom and instantly opened the tap to spray some water on yourself. Then you looked at your self in the mirror for a brief moment. The door opened right behind you. And there he was. Kim fucking Namjoon.

‘What the fuck is your problem?!’ He hissed at you, half shouting and walking towards you. His movements slow but he was confidently putting one foot in front of the other, staring directly at your face in the mirror. His face seemed emotionless at first, but then his brows furrowed and his lips turining into a smirk.

‘What the fuck is YOUR problem?! This is ladys room by the way’ you answered with the same anger as he brought in. He had no right to follow you, he also had no right to be in womens bathrooms. Yet, somehow he didn’t care about either of those facts at all.

‘Why the fuck would you act like this?’ He kept walking and nearly shouting at you. The temperature raising in the room. The tension growing like crazy because this fucking idiot was right there shouting at you. You hated his guts but at this right moment, he was insanely hot. The angrier he was getting the more you felt yourself getting wet. What the fuck. Its the most annoying guy you know, why would he make you feel like this?! ‘Why would wear something like this?’ He hissed again when he didn’t get an answer ‘and the Jungkook theatre?! Are you out of your mind?’ He continued and pointed outside when he mentioned Jungkook. What the hell was I wearing? How dares he even mention something like this. Why would he care who you were hanging out with and what was your plan.

‘Why are you even here? Why do you care?!’ You answered completely confused and out of breath as you were still really warm and dizzy.

But it was about to continue because he was now right in front of you. Nearly leaning over your, staring directly into your eyes. You were furious and so was he. Your breath started to pick up a faster pace, you noticed sweat on his forehead and him aggresively licking his lips. You bit your bottom lip seeing him all angry like that. It was insane. The air grew thicker as he kept just looking for something in your eyes. Some kind of answer, maybe a hint or sign. And something in that tension broke because he smashed his lips on yours and sat you up on the sink.

‘What the fuck?!’ You hissed and you pushed him away, trying to slowly slide down th esink. He was so annoying. So annoyingly hot. So annoying. No no. You cant be this weak. You have your rules and you know better than this. Better than to be swayed by a guy who despised everything about you and you about him. And then he came back, smashed his lips against yours AGAIN and you didn’t refuse this time. Fast breathing, his hands on your legs, smoothly making their way up. His tongue down your throat, your hand on his neck and the other in his long hair. Steamy. Steamy was the feeling, the room, the way he kissed. You were both really grabby about each other now. Both really hungry of the other, hungry of touch. He picked you up holding your ass and he walked with you to a cubicle and he shut the door behind him. He sat on the closed toilet and he sat you on top of him facing him. You bit his lip and moved to his neck, slowly licking and kissing up towards the back of his ear and he whined. This single act made him whine out loud. His hands explored your ass and when he got bored he moved under your dress and moved your underwear to the side. His tongue again back deep down you throat, and the second he touched you, you whimpered into his mouth. Hearing you moan made him smrik, still deeply entertained by your lips and mouth. He really wanted to play the long game but the anticipation and tension between the two of you for weeks has made it impossible. He slid his two fingers inside you and as he did so, you moaned into his mouth and he stopped kissing you.

‘You slut’ he hissed and you completely ignored what he just said to you. You slid his trousers slightly, just enough to gain access and pulled his rock hard dick that was ready for you there and there. He didn’t expect it, he opened his mouth and stared at you for a second as you started going with your hand up and down the length of it. He moved his fingers again and felt how wet you turned. You threw your head back when he started moving again. Fuck. Fuck you. You gained a little bit of clarity in your head.

‘I hate you’ you said irritated straight into his face.

‘I know’ he responded and he took his fingers out of you. He moved your hand away from his cock and lifted you slightly, his trousers fell lower down to his knees and he placed you on top of him. You poked your hand under yourself to aim him right and he just let go of you and you fell right onto him, his dick sliding into you at a fast paste and your body jerked trying to adjust to him. He gasped quietly and looked deep into your eyes. You locked your eyes with his as he slowly started moving inside you. The more pace he picked up, the more you couldn’t hold your facial expression. You leaned into him, attacking his lips and moaning in between his movements. He finally came to his senses and places one hand on your hip and the other on your ass and as he started ramming into you, you bouncing on top of him he kept kissing you back, he kept kissing your chin and your cheek, whatever was closer at the moment. His grip tightened on you and he picked up the pace even more, the both of your breathing loudly. He squeezed your ass and he felt you squeeze around him inside you. And as you closed your eyes and whispered ‘so close’, he picked up the pace to an insane speed and you were on the edge for a minute and then he switched one of his hands and squeezed your breast. That did it, you jerked your head to the back and closed your eyes moaning insanely loud and him kissing your neck helping you ride your high. And when you did and did see the stars, you looked down on him but the pace didn’t stop. You felt him slowly twitching and then you remembered, there wasn’t a condom break. There was nothing. You stopped him and got yourself off him, your juices slowly going town your leg. He looked at you with the biggest disgust at the same time with insane admiration. And then he pulled your hair and brought you all the way down to your knees and he opened your mouth with his finger and stuck himself in your mouth. No warning, no word. He was so close he needed to finish, and you were so hot, so slutty for him. He started fucking your throat and you let him, you put your tongue on top of him and sucked him off. It didn’t take long for him to come. You heard him grunt and moan and he finally came all the way down your throat. You swallowed everything you received. Your cheeks red, pink nose, hair messed up. You looked fucked. You were fucked. And you remained on your knees as he pulled himself together and then he helped you up, he tried putting your hair back to its best but he failed. And when you were about to unlock the door of the cubicle without a word he put a hand on yours and stopped you. He leaned you on the door and kissed you. But not harsh and aggressively like he did before. He kissed you like he really meant it, with care and he cupped your face and stroked it. He looked into your eyes, moved you to the side and left. He left you there. Without a word. Kim fucking Namjoon. What the fuck was that? You thought to yourself when you came to your senses and walked out. Checked yourself in the mirror and you did look fucked. You tried putting yourself together with the bits you had in your bag, but who were you fooling.

As Namjoon left the bathroom fixing himself and trying to look put together, Jungkook spotted him and approached him

‘Where have you been?’ He asked staring him down.

‘Just needed to fix some things’ he answered cryptically and moved on. Went towards the bar and ordered another drink.

Not long after you came out of the bathroom and Jungkook clocked what needed fixing. Based on the state of you he put 2 and 2 together and couldn’t stop giggling.

Yu-jin couldn’t find you. She really needed to tell you the good news and you were no where to be found. And then finally she found Jungkook giggling to himself.

‘Where is she?’ She asked.

‘Oh, uhm, just there’ he pointed at you leaving the bathroom trying to brush your dress down. He giggled again. ‘What the fuck happened to her?’ Yu-jin asked.

‘Namjoon’ Jungkook responded and moved away to find Hoseok.

‘We have a lot to talk about’ she said the second she approached.

‘I have no idea what youre talking about’ you were playing along, not about to tell your best friend you just fucked with the very man you were trying to avoid.

‘Me and Hoseok! Official!’ She jumped in place and you felt relieved because it was long time coming and also gave you the time to hopefully have her forget what she just saw.

‘Im so happy for you!’ You answered and hugged her. ‘Celebratory drink?’ You asked. You desperately needed to drink.

‘Lets get itttt’ Yu-jin was in the best of moods and decided not to ask about anything for now. For now.

The party went along, most of the guests disappeared and because Yi-jin wanted to close with Hoseok, you were tagging along.

‘We will just check if we took everything from the studio and will be right here okay?’ Your best friend announced and you nodded.

‘I will wait downstairs’ you added and went into the lift. Still deeply thinking about what happened few hours ago in the bathroom and trying to put the whole story toghether in your head you have made your way towards the lift. Of course. Your luck. Who was in the vert same lift?! Kim fucking Namjoon. The door closed, nobody else inside and he just approached you. Pushed you to the wall and kissed like there was no tomorrow.

‘Jagiya…’ he whined into your mouth. You were in shock. I mean the kissing was great but the name calling?

‘Namjoon are you drunk?’ You asked and he moved him slightly to the side, breaking the kiss.

‘No, i am really not. I just cant stop thinking about you’ he admitted, scratching the back of his head.

You didn’t know what to think about it. He was annoying and always late. But the chemistry the two of you had wasn’t normal. And you couldn’t just skip it, forget it, move on from it.

‘Fine, lets go home’ you said and you put your hand out so he would hold it, but he didn’t.

‘Let me ask you out properly first. Hoseok will rip me apart if he will find out… i will call you tomorrow?’ He asked. His eyes locked with yours, his facial expression was different too. He turned… sweet? Kim fucking Namjoon, annoying and always late. The man who infuriated you for the past few months and also the very same man who grunted few hours ago as you sucked him off, was now sweet and charming and… you loved it? What the fuck was wrong with you.

‘If you won’t, the ship will sail. There is only one chance with me’ you teased him and you left the lift and he followed. And you have met Hoseok and Yu-Jin staring at the two of you holding hands, with their mouths wide open. No fucking way.

‘So the part was what was actually needed huh?’ Hoseok smirked at the two of you and grabbed Yu-Jin closer to himself. You have immediately let go of Namjoons hand and he has taken two steps to the side from you. You looked at Yu-Jins face and you were expecting her to be surprised or angry or something. But she was just smiling. It all looked like they have planned all of this all along.

#bts #namjoon x reader #hoseok #fanfiction #fanfic #smut #rm #kim namjoon #jung hoseok #jhope #rm x reader

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justauthoring · 1 year ago

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naturally [7]

you fit into their little family perfectly - naturally. -> in which you have a little surprise for nanami

a/n: honestly this is really short and not my best, but i just wanted to get something out while i had the chance (school has been kicking me in the ass dudes and it's only been two weeks :()

pairing: nanami kento x f!reader

“Trust me, he’ll love it.”

That’s what your friend had said, a sly smile on her face as she handed the box into your awaiting hands.

The same box that laid on your lap now, taunting you.

In it was a light, pale blue babydoll set with matching panties; the bralette was lace and transparent with a silk bow in the middle that connected to the skirt that was made of a sheer flowy material. You’d yet to try it on but your friend had assured you it would fit you perfectly without a doubt.

It was your fault really. When you’d told her it was Nanami’s birthday coming up, she’d practically dragged you all the way to the mall, never once letting you steer in the other direction from the lingerie shop she was certain would hold the perfect birthday gift for Nanami.

That gift, basically, in a roundabout way, being you.

And so, you’d bought it, letting her distract you from the worries in your mind because really, Nanami had never really expressed any interest in this sort of thing. It wasn’t like a lingerie set was all that scandalous, but Nanami wasn’t very sexual in any sort of way. Yes, the two of you had been intimate with one another and it wasn’t like he’d made you feel ugly — rather, he spent most of his time complimenting you, making you feel like the most beautiful woman in the world.

But that’s just… he seemed happy with just having you and not much more than that. You’d bought a cute bra and underwear for him before, but this just felt… like a lot. Too much, rather.

Would he be weirded out by it?

What if he thought it was tacky?

Your hands are shaking before you even realize it, taking another glance at the clock, frowning when you realize he’ll be home soon. Yuji was out for the evening at a sleepover, and Nanami had expressed his excitement at the fact that the two of you would be home alone after he was done at work, emphasizing on the alone part. You’d known what that meant nd the idea had appeared in your mind before you’d been able to stop it;

This was the perfect opportunity to wear it.

But you just couldn’t force yourself to put it in, your insecurities and worries making you think of the worst.

You knew Nanami loved you. Hell, the two of you were getting married in a few months… and you knew he thought you were beautiful. It didn’t take a genius to see that given the way he looked at you or the way he’d whisper the words to you every morning before he left for work. You knew all of this, and you knew even if it ended up being something he didn’t enjoy, he’d never make you feel silly or ugly or too much for it…

You knew this. And yet, everything in your mind screamed otherwise.

“He’ll love it.”

Taking a sharp breath, you steel yourself. You’re being silly. You bought the damn thing, you might as well try to get some use out of it…

Taking the thin material in your hands, you stand, slipping out of the pajamas you’d been dressed in and replacing it with the babydoll. The material feels foreign on your skin and there’s a sense of vulnerability that swallows you as you stand there in the bedroom with only it on. You gaze at yourself from the mirror, taking in everything, pulling the material every-which-way to make sure it’s on perfectly.

Before you know it, you hear the familiar sound of the front door opening and shutting, telling you you’d stood in the same spot for way too long. Grabbing your robe off of the bed, you quickly wrap it around yourself, covering the lingerie beneath as you make your way out into the kitchen just as Nanami calls out for you.

“Oh,” he smiles when he sees you, turning to face you. “There you are.”

Biting back your nerves, you return his smile with ease, happy to see him after a day apart, crossing the distance over to him and moving to press a kiss against his cheek. “I missed you, Kento,” you hum out softly, cupping his cheek as you lean back to meet his gaze. “How was your day?”

“Good,” he nods with ease. “Better now that I’m home. Did Yuji get Suguru and Satoru’s easily?”

“Yes,” you reassure. “Suguru came and picked him up at the daycare, and he assured me they’d take good care of him for us tonight.”

Nodding, Nanami steps back, slowly letting his hands fall from your waist as he moves towards the fridge. “Have you eaten already?” He asks over his shoulder, “I was thinking we could order in tonight. I’m too tired to make dinner and–”

“Kento?”

Pausing at your call of his name, Nanami leans back from the ridge, meeting your eyes. He frowns when he sees the look of apprehension on your face, concern flooding his gaze. “Is everything okay, baby?” He calls out with a soft hum.

You nod, holding your hand out towards him with your palm turned up.

He glances at you, then the hand, before letting his fall in yours.

“Come with me?” You whisper, “I have a surprise.”

He looks confused, brows furrowing as he pauses, but despite his apprehension, he otherwise obliged, letting you lead him back down the hall and in the direction of the bedroom. He doesn’t fight you, even as you reach the room, pulling your hand from his and turn to shut the bedroom door.

Then, when you stand there for a moment, he can’t help but ask; “baby? What’s wrong?”

You inhale sharply, eyes falling to the rie of your robe, forcing your hands up to pull the tie apart, feeling the robe loosen around you before you shrug it off your shoulders, letting it fall to a pool at your ankles.

Nanami lets out a sharp gasp, and ignoring the way your chest tightens in worry, you turn, moving to face him.

His eyes fall on yours, then drift lower, flickering across your body and the lingerie set, before flickering back up to your eyes.

“I bought it for you,” you whisper, fighting the urge to cover your body with your arms, hands twitching by your sides. “For your birthday. I… I thought maybe you’d like it…”

Nanami’s lips part, but no words leave his lips. He is still, silent, the silence thickening around you and swallowing you whole. The anxiety eats at you, positive he’s hating what he’s seeing and that he thinks you're tacky or shameful…

“But if you don’t like it,” you start to ramble, unable to stop the words from leaving your lips. “I-I understand. And I can just take it–”

“No, no,” Nanami rushes out, blinking, as if snapping out of his own stupor. He takes a step towards you, hand held out towards him, “no, Y/N–baby… like it? I…” He hesitates and you feel yourself freeze, before a smile curls across his lips and he’s closing the distance between you. “I love it. You look beautiful.”

Lips parting, you reach for him, setting your hand on his hips as you meet his eyes. “You.. you really think so? You like it?”

“Oh God, Y/N, you look amazing,” he breathes, words breathless as he lets his eyes drift across you once more. He takes it all in, every inch, the way the lace looks on your skin, the way it hugs your body, the bare skin… Nanami can barely handle it, his eyes mesmerized by the sight in front of him, unable to look away. “I can’t keep my eyes off of you…”

Feeling your cheeks warm, you grip his shirt tighter. “It’s all for you, Kento,” you whisper, “just for you.”

He lets out a groan, taking you by the waist and tugging you against him so your chest is pressed against his own, chest rising and falling rapidly.

“I want you, baby,” he groans, “please… please, let me have you.”

“I’m yours,” you assure, nodding at him as you chase his lips. “All yours… your birthday present, baby. I’m completely yours.”

#jjk #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #nanami kento #nanami kento x reader #nanami x reader #nanami fluff

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maudie-duan · 20 days ago

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Series Summary: Harry has been fighting to keep his relationship with Olivia afloat for nearly two years. At what point do you choose to either endure or let the strain of the world defeat his ambitious hopes of a lasting relationship? Or will a single night and a fleeting encounter be enough to change the projection of Harry’s path? Maybe our ‘Mystery Girl,’ Shiloh, will just happen to be in the right place at the right time.

All Chapters Here <-

A/N: Okay, yay! to popping back into this one! I'm actually really feeling this story and think it has some good things in store. Thanks to all of those who have been patient and have supported this story in the past. I'm super grateful to you guys and love doing this!

Tag List: @howling-wolf97 @sassamanda77 @babegoalsreads @palmettogal508 @indierockgirrl

@lizsogolden @sexymfharriet @pologoonies

Word Count: 3.6K

Warning: Strong Language, Major Angst, Eventual Smut, Emotional.

Five months ago, it was her ex-boyfriend; this month, it was Timothee Chalamet.

I accidentally fell into a rabbit hole, a self-created paradox in which I scoured the internet for every scrap of information I could find on Shiloh Taylor. With nothing else to occupy my time in this hotel room, I found myself immersed in an unrelenting quest to know everything about her. This was one of the final nights of our press tour for the movie, and afterward, we would conclude our remaining leg in the States, wrapping up in California, but that was three weeks away.

“Oh my God, T—just pick a color,” Shiloah laughs, her smile playful, and she nudges Timothee on the knee, making my heart pick up. Then she stands and exits the scene, and I observe Timothee’s eyes casually follow her, resting his chin on his propped knee, mellow in the way he turns his cheek, somber and at ease watching her move about out of bounds of the camera.

This is her newest live; well, she was live yesterday; the time difference seems to always have a hand in adding to my misery.

I woke to hundreds of tweets and random headlines about Shiloh Taylor getting a “special gift” from Harry Styles. In short, it all went back to the same burning question. Will this be the love connection we’re all dying for?

And now I was feeding into the gossip, abiding my jealousy as I studied the way Timothee looked at her, trying to catch glances that might linger a little too long, but they always seemed neutral. “Wait—I forgot about this whole basket of nail polish…” Shiloah says, walking back into the shot, a wolven basket in hand, and she sets it on the ground, sitting cross-legged in front of it as Timothee sinks to the ground from her couch, both sitting in comfortable silence like this isn’t the first time they’ve hung out, and I know it’s not, but when you only see pictures it’s hard to guess the dynamic between the two—are they or are they not fucking? Everyone wants to know…including me.

It’s like being a fly on the wall, neither of them acknowledging the camera. “Dope, dude—you have so many colors,” he says, starting to sort through the basket. Then, I’m upright in my bed when I see a familiar box in his grasp, and I turn the volume up.

“Yo, dude, are these from Harry Styles’s new line?” And Shiloh barely looks up. She was too busy setting up her tools, but if you looked closely enough, there was a hint of a smile playing on her lips, but only if you were looking for it like I was, and here I was spiraling down this obsessive void I’ve wormed myself into—a steady forming habit—me constantly trying to get my fix.

When Shiloh finally gives him her attention, he’s opening one of the three boxes I sent her—Perfect Pearl—Shiloh bends a knee to her chest, wraps her hands around her leg, and watches Timothee pluck each polish from its packaging, “How is he so cool? A nail polish line is perfect, dude. He’s so smart.” And Timothee is feeding my ego, filling my sense of pride, and it’s so hard not to like him. I don’t really have a reason other than I want to be him sitting in a room all alone with the girl I’ve wanted since the moment I saw her.

“I like that dark blue. Can I see that one?” she asks, “Inky Pearl…” she reads, setting it next to her. Timothee is already onto the next box—The Shroom Boom set—and while they’re unboxing, I’m reading through the comment section, which I know was booming because, as of late, my fans have been spamming her non-stop; once they finally figured out it was her in my Gucci Campaign, she became fresh meat.

I’ve been slowly watching her following climb, not just because of me. I think when she was hanging out with her Ex for a little while, she hit another wave, then the photoshoot. Now, she’s been seen hanging out with Timothee recently. The two of them being photographed out and about in LA, which has really sparked the rumor mill.

But not as much chaos as the photoshoot. I thought after a month, it would die down, but the fans have been persistent, relentlessly trying to ship the two of us for months. It’s been a while since they’ve actually shown a positive reaction to someone. The whole Olivia thing blew up in such a negative way that it almost felt like a breath of fresh air; there are worse people to be linked to.

My sister told me that Shiloh’s podcast session had been her most played episode yet, upping her following. When the clip of Shiloh not realizing that Gemma and I were related went viral, everyone praised her authenticity. It became a joke that was supposed to jab at my ego, but it only made me like her more. I liked that she could separate the two, which meant the friendship between her and my sister was pure at its core.

Right before the photoshoot dropped, headlines were spewing details of Olivia and I’s ending. Details popping up from the beginning when she left her long-time partner to be with me. Yes, the whole thing was messy, but I never expected it to come out.

Their nanny spilling details of fights between the two of them left me in a weird state of mind, being able to hear both sides of the story, not just hers. Details, I imagined happening but brushed them off because I was wrapped up in the idea of us, the whirlwind of this new adventure she was taking me on. Filming the movie kept us in a tight-knit community of people—they always say it’s easy to fall in love with a cast mate—they weren’t wrong.

I had no clue what was unfolding behind the scenes for her and Jason, and had I been a better person, I would have backed off, maybe given them space to figure out their shit, but it was fast, Olivia was interesting, and she knew so much about this whole other world that I was so interested in that we got swept up, and when the filming was over, we pranced around, her following me on tour, glued to my side, her own life becoming more and more disheveled. I could see her unraveling.

She wasn’t fit for my lifestyle, and I wasn’t settled enough for hers and the world that she played in—and now we’re tangled up in this messy ending that seems to be playing out for the world’s entertainment, both prisoners of our own expiration—I guess you can call it Karma.

“Alright, guys—” Shiloh announces, finally giving attention to the camera. She pulls the screen closer, her green eyes sweeping over the screen, definitely reading the comments, but she trained at her craft, and I’ve never been able to gauge any of her reactions.

“This last box has a note—” Timothee tells her, as I watch a scrap of paper float to the ground, and my heart races, knowing it was the handwritten note I had slipped in the last box, a sneak peek before our next launch, and she was the only one of the five people I handed them out to, the others being my family and friends—hints the spark of gossip, and here was proof.

Shiloah’s head turns in his direction, his eyes silently flitting over the note, and he smiles a huge grin, giving it away, then hands her the slip of paper, but she doesn’t read it. She places it on the ground next to her, my heart dropping with her lack of enthusiasm. Timothee, who hasn’t stopped smiling, observes this, and they make swift eye contact, and he rubs at his bottom lip to control his knowing smile.

She smooths her lips together, then her eyes are back on the screen; the comment section is freaking out because the fans that are watching have never seen that packaging, catching on that it’s new, something unseen, and here is Shiloh with the first glimpse and everyone is losing their minds except for her—even Timothee was more excited than her, and I’m over here reeling for even the tiniest morsel because at this point I don’t think I’ll ever live down that drunk dial.

“Oh—this is a Hot Holiday…” Timothee laughs, revealing the name of the next launch, “This is the color I choose.” And he holds up the color Harry’s Chair, a seaweed green, and reads the color out loud, the chat a non-stop ping in the corner of the screen, and my heart is thudding against my chest, dying for her to read my note, not even caring if Timothee just announced my next launch for me.

She glances over and smiles, moving away from the screen, “That’s a nice green. I like the yellow. Can I see that one—”

“Oh yeah—that would look nice with your skin tone…” He adds. This is the first flirty grin I’ve seen sweep across his face as he hands her the polish.

Shiloh returns the smile, eyes darting down to the polish in her hand timidly, something shy about her gaze, and she draws in a deep breath, her chest rising with the effort, then she shakes her head, glancing back up at him with that same smile, and I think they’re flirting—a silent chemistry that’s almost breaking my heart.

“Each box comes with nail stickers—” he says with a nervous laugh.

“Oh shoot, that’s so cool. Are those letters next to you?” And she reaches over the basket, coming up to her knees, planting a hand on the ground to steady herself. She’s hovering over the basket now, her black short shorts rising, her Spice Girl crop top billowing down, exposing the soft skin along her ribs, skin I’ve run my hands down, skin I’ve touched and savored. She reaches next to Timothee, who is completely unphased by her close proximity, her messy pigtail brushing over his arm wrapped around his knees, and he doesn’t even finch. He’s reading the label inside the box as Shiloh gathers the stickers he’s collected next to him.

Shiloh falls back on her heels, sorting through each one, “These are good, it’s going to be hard to choose…but I also kind of like that oatmeal-looking color next to you,” She expressed, eyes flicking to the pile of polish next to Timothee.

Timothee pulls it out of the mound and reads it out loud, “Tender Bud,” and she grins, a huge smile stretching across her face, and she bits down on her lower lip, making my heart soar, finally a reaction that I can live with, daydream about, fantasize about the possible thoughts running through her head at that very moment because what made her smile like that? Did she have a dirty mind like me? Because that’s where my mind went.

“I’m feeling neutral…” She pokes, “I think I’ll go with that one…also, you’re the first person that’s come on the show who wants to paint their own nails…”

“Really?” He asks, handing her the polish with that same friendly smile that never seems to vanish. A curl falls into his face, and he swipes it behind his ear. Shiloh catches the move, and even I swooned.

She smiles down at the polish, rubbing her glossed lips together, making me ache to feel them against mine, “Okay, before we start, you write down five questions from our guests—” And this is another thing about her. She’s so good at treating every viewer like they’re hanging out in the room, and the thing about it is that it’s not forced. It’s so fucking genuine that even I get lost in her presence, forgetting how long I’ve been staring at a screen.

Shiloh gives Timothee a notepad and pen, and leans over to the screen. “Alright, guys. You know what to do. Remember, play nice, give us some good questions…” Then they’re both staring at the screen, Timothee’s unwavering smile growing bigger as the questions flood in.

After a few seconds, Timothee plants himself in front of the screen, and Shiloh moves away, continuing to organize everything behind him. I watch her pick up each empty box and fold them back together with care, placing the packaging neatly on the couch, along with the bottles of nail polish that came with each set.

She moves the basket out of view from the screen, then yanks a pillow off the sofa and shoves the pillow under her butt, and sits cross-legged, waiting for Timothee to finish, then swipes her phone from a couch cushion. Every time he laughs or interacts with someone, she laughs, and I realize she’s watching it from her phone. All hands on deck, she has this down to a science as she replies to people in the comment section, everyone losing their minds that she got Timothee on the show.

“Okay, I need one more question, guys; come through; I know you got one…” Timothee coos at the screen, his charming charisma stealing the show, but I’m focused on Shiloh. The second she put the phone down, she slid my note in front of her, staring down at the floor, trying not to gain any attention—And maybe if you knew what you were looking for, you would see these tiny details, but it’s there, and her eyes are skimming over the note, her mouth smoothing together, trying to hide that smile that I see trying to break away, that tilt at the corner of her mouth fighting to break through and then it’s there, on full display, and she drawing in her bottom lip, finger tracing along the edge of the paper.

And I’m smiling, smiling so fucking big that I can feel the stretch in my cheeks. Then she peeks at the camera for a split second and smirks, eyes shifting back to the paper, and she slyly moves it back to its previous place next to her, falling back into the palms of her hands, her eyes pinned on the note. Her face is turned away from the screen, only feeding me a sliver of her profile, but the smile is still there, present in all its glory.

And I’m lost in her all over again; just as Shiloh turns around, a knock sounds on my door, and I slam the laptop shut, feeling like a teenage boy about to get caught watching porn. Then, I bound to the door and peeked through the peephole.

It’s Olivia.

My heart slams in my chest, and I pull back from the door. What the fuck could she want? We haven’t really talk much since the tour started, neither one of us wanted to draw attention, and we both thought it was in our best interest to give each other space, but here she was breaking that agreement.

“Is everything okay?” I ask, cracking open the door. I’m only in my underwear, and even though she’s seen me naked, it feels strange to put myself on display to her; it’s been three months since we broke up, and it still doesn’t feel long enough to have a casual interaction.

“Hey—umm…actually, I don’t know why I came here…” She answers, waving a frantic hand, then turns away, and of course, I feed into it because I know she went out of her way to figure out which room I was staying in—I told the team ahead of time that I wanted to pay for my own room to keep my privacy.

I open the door and step out into the hall, “Olivia, wait…it’s fine— come in—” I tell her, waving her back, already feeling annoyed because I know there isn’t a single thing we have left to talk about, but I kept my neutrality anyway.

She’s playing into her bit a little more than usual tonight, and when she turns around, I can’t tell if the pain on her face is real or forced, “I’m sorry—I just—needed to talk.” And she walks past me into my room, and now I’m stuck with the decision I just made.

“What’s wrong?” I nudge as soon as the door closes. Her eyes are darting around the room like she’s looking for something, but there’s nothing to find. It’s just been me. I haven’t been with anyone since the breakup.

She shrugs, tossing her hair over her shoulder, giving me this look that, please pity me; I’m a helpless fool for you, and it immediately throws me off, those big green eyes of hers begging, then she turns around and starts undressing.

“Olivia—” I start as her shirt comes over her head, her bare breast hanging there on full display. She knows this was my favorite part of her; her nipples easily peaked at even the slighted touch, and it always turned me on…like, I’m getting turned on right now.

My eyes flit to the bed, where the laptop rests on top of the bedspread. Then Shiloh appears in my mind, a vision of her reading my note, and my whole body wakes with it. Olivia must see the change in my expression as interest because she continues to take off her clothes, then walks over and drops to her knees in front of me, gazing up with those same pleading eyes.

“Just one last time…” She breathes, and I’m a penniless fool for her tone as she lowers my boxers and wraps her warm hands around my shaft, my dick hardening with what’s to come. I close my eyes then and let my head fall back, Shiloh moving across my mind’s eye, and as Olivia closes her lips around the head of the penis, Shiloh is all I can think about.

So yes, I fucked my ex, but I thought of Shiloh the entire time, swapping visions of curved hips and dreaming of her full lips pressed to mine, and when I came, I was so enveloped in her presence that I almost called out her name, breathing the first few letters into existence, abruptly stifling it with a seal groan caught at the back of my throat just as Olivia’s face came to view, and when the expression on her face went from pleasure to pissed, she climbed off of me in a furry, staggering to her pile of clothes laid out on the floor.

“I know what you were about to say—” she spits, “You couldn’t just give me this one last thing, could you?” And I push myself up on the bed, watching her slip back into her clothes.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about…” I lie.

“Bullshit, Harry—like I haven’t seen the rumors flying around…god, what’s that new one…” she says, pausing for dramatic effect, her finger on her chin, raking my inside with annoyance.

She laughs, “Oh—yeah, your fans are freaking out about your newest launch…well, I guess it hasn’t launched yet, but Shiloh has already gotten her hands on it, and everyone is just dying to know what the note said?”

“It was nothing, just a simple thanks for supporting Pleasing…I don’t know…I didn’t write it. I was just trying to get more press around Pleasing. You, of all people, know how that works.”

Olivia shakes her head, not buying the lie, “The thing is…is that I saw you at the Gucci Show, you were so distracted, and when we went home that night, you pulled away, I could see the end playing out in your eyes every time you looked at me.”

“Oh, come on, Olivia…enough with the drama already,” I exhale, getting worked up, irritated that she’s trying to call me out.

“No, seriously…and then I saw that photoshoot, and I still don’t know if I truly believe it was a random happenstance like you said…It seemed too good, spot on because everything made sense after that, the break? or fucking breakup, I don’t know anymore…”

I don’t say anything; I just stare at her, indifferent to it all because I don’t owe her anything, “Did you guys fuck? Is that why you didn’t come home until four in the morning the night of the photoshoot?”

“Olivia for fuck sake…I’ve already told you a million times. How many more times do I have to tell you I never cheated…there was no other woman. You and I were never going to work, and you know it.”

Her mouth drops into a frown, “I loved you…” She whispers as a low whimper rises up her chest just as tears begin to pull in her eyes.

“God—Olivia—” I breath, falling back into my pillow and swiping a hand down my face. “Do we really have to do this?” I yell.

“You’re the one that came to me…” I force, starting up at the ceiling. I don’t even want to look at her anymore, witness her fall apart for the umpteenth time because it’s getting old. What did she want? She got what she came for, and then I’m sick to my stomach, the thought of using Shiloh like that, to sink to that level when I’ve already hurt her. The thought that I just gave myself over to Olivia that easily has me out of bed, pushing past Olivia, who is standing there waiting for a reply she’ll never get.

“Just let yourself out,” I hiss, slamming the bathroom door behind me. Then, I’m on my knees, retching into the toilet bowl as the sound of the door slams in the distance, and I wipe my mouth with my forearm and force myself to turn on the shower.

A/N: Okay, but can we talk about how Harry was behaving during the press tour for Don't Worry Darling in Venice because that is where I drew inspo for this chapter. I imagined he was acting a fool because he had slept with Olivia and felt silly about his decision, so of course, it had to be awkward because he's just a boy after all.

All Chapters Here <-

My Tiny Masterlist Here<-

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thelov3lybookworm · 1 year ago

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I Didn't Ask For This (part twelve)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11

Summary: Marriage had always been something sacred to little Y/n, something dream like, where her husband would come and whisk her away to a fairyland. At least, that's what she had always thought.

All her dreams would be shattered.

But maybe she can salvage them?

•○●⛦●○•

Tw: none that I can think of, so let me know if I need to add anything.

A/n: you did not think I would forget about my baby, did you? Yes, I am in fact, not dead. And yes, I didn't write anything for this fic for a long time because I had no idea what to do 😌

Also, thank you for all the love that you gave this one. I am soo glad I was able to write something for you to love. 🥹❣️

This is the last part in this series. But if there is something you want to see in a possible epilogue, please send in an ask or comment.

Enjoy!

•○🌑○•

A loud knock on the door startled Y/n, who was trying not to get caught reading the very... not child friendly stuff Nesta had given her. Cauldron knew what else Nesta had in store for Y/n.

The knock was a little too loud to be Azriel, because most of the time Y/n didn't even realise someone had knocked when Azriel knocked. So it was definitely most probably Cassian, who was probably excited about something.

She got up to open the door, wondering if she should hide the book she was reading in case Cassian decided to barge in. For Cassian, it wouldn't be anything new.

She felt like it was the biggest shock in her life when she found Azriel standing outside the door, his hand poised to knock again as he grinned widely at her, panting.

Because, first of all, Azriel was a quiet person. Hell, even his wings made no sound when flying. If he knocked so loud, it was probably something huge. She didn't know if it was a good thing or not.

And second and more concerning thing was that Azriel was grinning. This was a man who would glare at people just for smiling in his direction.

Now she wondered if she really should have hidden the book.

"Azriel? Is everything alright?"

Impossibly, he somehow managed to grin wider. Once he had gained some semblance of control over his breathing, he spoke.

"Everything's fine. Perfect even."

Now Y/n was seriously concerned.

"Why are you grinning?"

"I need to show you something."

He offered her his hand, which she eyed suspiciously before taking. "What is it?"

"It wouldn't be fun if I told you about it." He pointed out, leading her to a nearby balcony.

That made sense.

He picked her up and began flying, the setting sun making the atmosphere beautiful. That was all Y/n tried to think about because if she didn't, she would continue to hound Azriel for answers, and he was too stubborn for his own good. He wouldn't tell her what it was, no matter what.

Soon, he was landing in front of a beautiful house, a beautiful lawn surrounding it. The area was quiet. There were similar looking houses nearby, a few shops. They were near the center of Velaris, but the pace was still quiet, tranquil even. Just like Azriel.

Y/n thought she knew what was going on, but still she asked. "Why are we here?"

Azriel grinned, a light blush dusting his cheeks. "I wanted to show you this place. Do you like it?"

"It's beautiful." She stretched out the word, searching his face.

"I brought that home. I thought now that we are... getting to know each other again and are comfortable, we might as well live somewhere far from Cassian and Nesta. Figured you might be just as tired of them as I am. Of course, I'm not saying you should live with me if you don't want to, but one day... maybe?" He looked at her when he finished rambling, his eyes hopeful.

She smiled. "I would love to live with you Azriel. So, when are we going to move in?"

Azriel's face lit up like a child who had recieved a gift on solstice. "As soon as possible. If you're okay with it." He paused for a moment, thinking. "Do you want to take a look inside?"

"Sure."

Azriel led her inside the mostly empty but clean house, a little jump in his steps. Y/n smiled and shook her head as he walked in front of her, opening all the doors and cupboards, a small grin on his blushing face.

•○🌑○•

Azriel was cooking, having forced Y/n to sit and watch. Since there weren't many things in the house except for a couch, bed and a few cupboards, Azriel had flown back to the house of wind to get items for their dinner.

She had offered to cook, but he had refused. And since then, Y/n could tell he was trying really hard to impress her with his cooking skills.

They kept talking throughout, his focus equally divided.

Right now, he was seemingly about to flip the food in the pan, and he turned to her.

"Watch this." But then he realised she was already watching, and he faltered.

Unfortunately, he had already begun to move the pan. And because he wasn't paying attentiont to the pan, the food items in the pan scattered all around the kitchen, and Y/n hid her smile behind a hand.

Cauldron, Azriel was adorable.

He stared at the mess, his shoulders slumping. Y/n hopped down from the counter she was siting on and moved closer to him. "Go. Sit. I'll make us something."

Azriel shook his head. "No."

Y/n cocked her head. "Why not? I cooked all the time by myself before."

"I'll get something from a restaurant."

Her brows furrowed. "But why?"

"Because I want to treat you better than you have been treated before." He mumbled under his breath, barely audible. Maybe he was trying to not let her hear, but she did.

Her heart swelled, as if it tripped fell down the stairs and now had to rest in bed for its whole life.

"You are treating me good." She smiled at him when he looked at her with wide eyes. He blushed furiously when she placed a tender kiss on his cheek.

"What– what would you like to eat?"

Y/n sighed. "Anything. I don't really have something in mind."

Azriel nodded. "I'll be back soon."

And with that, he bounded off towards the door, leaving his shadows behind to clean up the mess he had made.

•○🌑○•

Y/n watched as her husband moved his hand animatedly, his face filled with excitement.

The two of them sat on the couch, knees touching. Y/n wondered if in a few moments she'd be on his lap.

It had started out with her on the couch and him on the armchair near the fire, having finished their dinner sitting on the kitchen counter top because there was no table or chairs. After that, they had moved to hear the fireplace.

They had sat in silence, contemplating what to talk about when she found Azriel grinning.

When she asked him about it, he told her about how his shadows loved to be nosy and knew almost everyone's secret. How they had been telling him about the secret of the little boy passing by the house. It was that he had stolen a cookie without his mother's knowledge, and how he prayed to the cauldron that she never found out.

Since then, he had begun telling her of all the juicy secrets he gathered over the years, his shadows occasionally chiming in to add to the information. He had slowly begun shifting towards her as he spoke.

It wasn't long before he settled on the opposite end of the couch, a huge smile on his face as he told her of one of his favourite secrets that he found out, his body seemingly moving of its own accord.

Throughout the night after that, he had shifted closer anytime he got a little more excited, her scooting closer when she got more and more intrested in the story he was telling.

He finally stopped speaking, taking a deep breath, his cheeks flushed and a wide grinon his face.

Y/n sighed. "Well... that was a journey."

"I have better stories than that." He smirked smugly when her eyes widened in disbelief.

"Liar. I don't believe you. Even Nesta's books have less dramatic plot lines."

He grinned, shaking his head. "Speaking of Nesta's books... did you enjoy the book that you were you reading today?"

Y/n immediately tensed. "What do you mean?"

He gave her a sly smirk. "I'm the spymaster of the night court, Y/n, and I've been married to you for almost six months now. Do you really think I don't know what conspires between you and Nesta when me and Cassian aren't looking?"

A blush climbed up Y/n's neck. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Sure. Let me help you with that–" And then, as if the damn book had been next to him this whole time, he pulled it out of between his shadows and flipped open to where she had been reading when he interrupted her that morning. She knew that because she found the candy wrapper she placed in between the pages to mark the her progress.

She gasped, but he was already beginning to read. "Where were you? I think it was here? He grinned up at her from between her thighs..." He paused for a moment, reading, before he clicked his tongue. "You are really interested in this?"

He was busy reading, and so he didn't see her reaching out to snatch the book until she had a firm grasp on the book. He looked at her in surprise, but she began tugging. Of course, he didn't let her pull it too far before he himself started tugging at it.

"Let go Azriel."

He gave a harsh tug, and Y/n was no match for his strength. She lurched forward, her hand landing on his shoulder. Her face was mere inches from his and he grinned up at her.

"Really? You like this–" He shook the book near her face. "–this thing so much? Honestly, you could choose better."

Her whole face flushed as she tried to keep herself from glancing at his lips. "Don't be mean. It's rude to judge people."

"Hard not to when you read childish things like these." She scowled at him, and he leaned closer to her as he whispered, "Honestly, I could show you better things. The male here is like a newborn child compared to me."

Y/n blinked in shock, his closeness doing nothing to help her slow brain. He huffed a laugh at her reaction, and the air on her face finally pulled her from her daze. She began to pull back, trying to retreat back into her original position, but he caught hold of the hand on his shoulder, his expression serious.

Azriel's eyes trailed down to her mouth, and his tongue flicked out to lick his lips. He glanced up at her eyes, his eyes swimming with question.

Y/n knew it would be pointless and stupid to pretend she didn't want what he was offering. She could not keep lying to herself when this was all she wanted since the two of them began spending more time together.

So she simply leaned back in, her eyes fluttering shut when his breath caressed her features again.

•○●⛦●○•

Azriel didn't need anymore confirmation.

He was tired of waiting, and now that she was so close, it was too hard not to sink his teeth into her. Into those beautiful lips, that beautiful body.

So he surged up, and caught his lips with hers.

In that moment, it felt like he had found peace. Something he had been searching his whole life for. Like he had found the home he never had.

Not the house he was currently in, but home in her.

And when she gasped, he realised there were multiple reasons responsible for that feeling.

First obviously being that he loved her.

Second, she loved him.

And how did he know?

He felt it coming at him in waves.

Through the newly found golden string connecting their souls.

I love you. The emotions he felt from her seemed to tell him.

I love you more. The emotions he sent back to her.

And there, on that couch in their new house, tangled in each other's arms...

Azriel and Y/n were finally home.

•○🌑○•

Taglist: @bubybubsters @maxxieluvs @bubbbllee @buckyandgeraltsupremacy @waytoomanyteenagefeels @tell-me-a-poem @the-lake-is-calling @spaxxxi @japanese-wonderland-blog @valeridarkness @moonlwghts @deadratio @esposadomd @harrystylesfan2686 @missusbarnes-rogers @whatthefuckshappeningrn @hyacinthoideshispanica @historygeekqueen @lizziesfirstwife @nastynesta @aroseinvelaris @nightless @cleverzonkwombatsludge @kodokunarisu-blog @selillusion @eos-princess @moonfawnx @a-court-of-milkandhoney @emilyo-218 @wannabewolf @ailyr92 @chronically-online-cheese @myheartfollower @hells-sluttiest-new-arrival @marina468 @menaosama @starryhiraeth @hereticdance @mali22 @valencia-rou @azrielsstarlight @marvelouslovely-barnes @luvmoo @starlight-hope @a-frog-with-a-laptop @fall-myriad @alt-ghost @elleofdragons @ruleroftides @5moremin @stargirl1714 @bunnymallowo @ivy-34 @aria-chikage @kalulakunundrum

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starlightwayfinder · 29 days ago

Note

You know, your post saying Ven can’t wrap his head around why people would use the darkness is getting me thinking again about its nature and place in the setting. I hope it doesn’t end up being as evil as the narrative makes it out to be.

This is a super interesting ask, and I think to answer it honestly—I have to disagree a little, but I also do agree? Let me explain my thoughts.

Personally, I do think the narrative works best when “light” and “darkness” are literally interpreted as good and evil, creation and destruction, love and hatred, etc. The thing is, KH is clever and has made a point to specify that *true* light and darkness are a little different from what people might initially assume to be good and evil.

Of all the games, KHDR looks most deeply into what actually defines darkness. The best example off the top of my head is when they’re comparing the residents of Wonderland. Even though they all seem to harbor a negative emotion of ‘fear’, only the Queen manifests it as darkness in her heart. The difference being that she harms and executes others to maintain her power. We see how she is consumed by ire and lashes out at everyone. Xehanort argues that maybe her darkness is necessary to maintain order… but it’s not a good kind of order to make people live in fear, is it?

Conversely, what defines light? Some ‘light’ sided characters like Eraqus go around seeking to obliterate the darkness out of a hatred for it. (He justifies this by mentally separating darkness from people, but khdr confirmed that hearts and darkness are basically entangled in the modern era.) This sort of behavior doesn’t align with ‘true’ light though, as harming others is still what defines darkness. Of course, there are situations where fighting is required to protect people from harm—but even then, it’s not ideal to have to hurt anyone. When people have been hurt, it can be accepted and transformed into light / something ‘good’, or it can continue to manifest as darkness and become something cyclical that hurts others too.

The best understanding of light in KH is found in actions that stem from a desire to help and heal others. Take Kairi helping Sora come back from being a Heartless, for example. Even though he had fallen to darkness, she revived him with the power of her faith and love. Sora himself says that ‘deep down there’s a light that never goes out’ in every heart, and that ‘Kingdom Hearts is light’. This makes logical sense to me, if life and light are the same, you can’t be alive without light. And if that light never really goes out, neither does a person’s life. Hence why the heart is ‘never really gone’.

A lot of what KH asks comes down to—“what is a perfect world?” In the lore and fairytales of the series, light was a freely given gift from Kingdom Hearts—presumably in the form of hearts. What gave way to darkness was people attempting to selfishly claim that light for themselves and take it from others. This turns the world from order to chaos, and Kingdom Hearts disappears. Until it can truly return, there will still be darkness and suffering in the now-divided worlds. Coexistence and peace would be the ideal world order, but the conflict between light and darkness prevents it. Note that the real conflict between light and darkness is “darkness tries to possess light”, not “they both try to destroy each other”. I don’t think that true light, the kind that has ‘more than meets the eye’, is out to destroy darkness so much as to return it to light.

We don’t know everything about the True Darknesses yet, but Khux implies that they cast away their forms to conquer light, only to realize that their will would be lost without bodies. This is why they seek to ‘infect’ people’s hearts and stay alive through expansion, claiming more worlds and lights along the way. The Master of Masters claims they are entirely different from people, and yet we see Vanitas gain a heart—which by my logic before, wouldn’t even be alive without possessing at least some light, right?

So to answer your question, I do think darkness is “evil”, but only in the sense of being an absence or willful rejection of goodness / light. I think there’s a real chance the KH ending will be one of reconciliation and restoration. It would be pretty wonderful to see all of the true darknesses get their own forms and hearts again, especially if that puts an end to the conflict once and for all. Darkness isn’t completely bad to the extent of being irredeemable, but it is completely bad in that—on its own—it only causes an endless cycle of cruelty and pain to be inflicted on people. Just like you can’t fight fire with fire, you can’t fight darkness with darkness; light is the key necessary to make things right again.

So to explain my headcanon about Ven, we have to get into his mind as a pure-hearted person. He’s selfless and aims to share light rather than possess it for himself (or fight over it with others.) That’s how the ideal world is supposed to work, and it benefits everyone. So he doesn’t see the logic in hurting others to benefit only yourself. That will just make people hate you, right? Where’s the harmony in that? He values friendship above all else, so that’s why he can’t wrap his mind around people valuing other things (power) more and justifying harming others to gain them. That’s why ‘his friends are his power’. Because if you have the light of friendship, you don’t need to take power from others or use the power of darkness to feel fulfilled.

Thanks for the ask!! I hope this explanation makes sense 😅

#It’s not exactly a super easy thing to explain #because it’s like #yes darkness is bad. It encompasses the worst evils you can imagine #But light is *so* good that it’s okay that bad exists. Because light can make it good again #And that’s why there’s hope even in the deepest darkness—you know?#Kingdom Hearts #Khdr #kh

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theflagscene · 2 months ago

Text

Random QL Superlatives - 2024 Edition

Listen, if there’s a trend that involves lists, imma jump on that! So here I am, giving random niche awards to my faves ☺️

Best use of a deity’s name - God / Monster Next Door

His nickname being Godzilla made sense in the webcomic, they carried the whole fire breathing monster motif over into very cutesy cartoons but I was not expecting them to shorten his nickname even further. Giving a nickname a… nickname?? 🤔 But you know what, it freaking worked! God was a gift sent down from the heavens. He was the perfect giant puppy and the greenest green flag, really perfectly named imo.

Best jerk off scene - Fadel / The Heart Killers

Not only was this jerk off scene the most realistic one I’ve ever seen on network television—boy was done in sixty seconds!—but it was also the most realistic male orgasm I’ve ever seen. The scrunched up face, the weird grunting and huffing noises, kicking his leg, Joong came (heh) to prove a point and he did!

Best allegory for life and death - Love For Love’s Sake

From the constant water noises, to the video game visuals, the loss and gaining of points, the borrowed time, the crumbling world, the memory loss, the messages from the people left behind. When Myungha is caught between the life he lost and the second chance he was being given as he stands surrounded by darkness and water, dripping wet from his death but wearing the high school uniform from his second chance… just ugh! Perfect, absolutely beautiful.

Best fucked up family dynamic - Unknown

I love a messy family, but I love a messy found family even more. This was the perfect blend of both, with Wei Qian and Li Li being biologically related, Zhi Yuan the one they took in from the streets and Tan Yu the lifelong friend and only reason Wei Qian was able to keep a roof over their heads for so many years, it was bound to become insane. And insane it was, but in such a fantastic way. Messy forbidden love all around, arguments and fights and so much drama. But they all came out of it the other side better people, and a stronger family.

Best horniest bastards - MutRak / Love Sea

FortPeat will always deliver when it comes to high heat, and while I might have issues with the screenwriter’s… idiosyncrasies, shall we call them? Love Sea was one of her lesser offensive offerings, focusing mostly on the lust driven horn balls that were Mahasumut and Rak. Were there other plot points? Yes. Didn’t any of them matter? Not really. We all knew Mut would get his man in the end, boy put Rak under a dick spell from the first moment they met. I think this was the first QL with a canonical facefucking scene, kudos boys.

Best speedrun of feels - KanThiu / Spare Me Your Mercy

Where did the emotions come from? When did they start? Did Kan have a crush on Thiu from the stories that Thiu’s mother had told him? Neither are in the closet or into one night stands… yet they’re not dating. They have a full blown emotional relationship, before even sharing a kiss. KanThiu might secretly actually be useless lesbians and we’re all just being tricked!

Best health code violations - OabPlawan / This Love Doesn’t Have Long Beans

No amount of Purell will ever make any of those kitchens food safe, two public kitchens and one private one, those pots and pans saw some shit!

Best sudden pairing replacement - MarcPoon

When the little DV dickhead was yanked from the We Are lineup, even though half of the filming was done, I was very concerned about the series getting shelved. But instead we got MarcPoon and omg, they are quickly becoming everything to me! Why are they so perfect? The chemistry, the cuteness, I just adore them.

Most unexpected second season announcement - Pit Babe Season 2

The scream I scrumpt, okay, that’s a lie, I didn’t scream. I laughed out loud and shouted: omg they fucking did it! Which prompted the infamous ‘butt babies’ conversation with my mother, so yeah, completely unexpected but very much excited for.

Best return to the QL world - Saint Suppapong

I have never been so happy to be wrong in my life! The morning I posted my answer for one of the ‘15 Day BL Challenge’ questions where I mentioned that I wished Saint would return to BLs but I highly doubted he ever would, that same morning Idol Factory dropped the teaser the rocked the fandom. Saint is returning to QLs! My flabbers were gasted.

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bratbutcute · 2 months ago

Text

A silent pact of silence

Hi! @theanonemu it is I, your secret Santa. I finally revealed myself to gift you… your gift.

Okay I’ll stop it ahah, I hope you have some free time because this fic got LONG.

Just a little reminder: English isn’t my first language, so you might find some grammar mistakes! If so please dm me or comment so I can fix them.

Now let’s dive right in.

Fandom: Hazbin Hotel

Pairing: Alastor/Lucifer

Prompts: Lovingly wrecking with gentle & light tickles; Character A unknowingly tickling character B who tries to suffer through it but eventually gives way and hijinx ensue;

Disclaimer: other than this is a tickle fic (obviously I’d say) there is nothing more to add to it.

Words count: 4524

Lucifer goes to the library to run away from his worries; he likes being alone there, until Alastor arrives to disrupt his peace. Will they listen to Charlie’s notes and become friends or will their rivalry prevail?

Happy late Christmas, Yule, Hanukkah, Solstice, Kwanzaa, and all the other celebrations happening during these days ❤️

(tagging here you amazing @squealing-santa, thank you so much for your patience and for your amazing organisation. This was my first year participating but I really loved having you as a host)

~~~

“Dear guests I hope you’ll like this library! Read as much as you like but don’t forget to make new friends! -Charlie”

Books or, to be more precise, reading books is something quite unusual in Hell.

Sinners usually enjoy other kinds of activities in their afterlives.

Lucifer has always loved them, since the moment humans came up with the idea of putting words onto paper he's been engrossed by the thought of carrying knowledge in the palm of your hand.

He has read thousands of books, written by humans on Earth - smuggled by those who could go there -, written by sinners in Hell, and he himself has written some of them. Charlie has always loved hearing her father interpret a story by doing different voices and shapeshift to fit the characters.

The Hotel had a rather big library, not the greatest, but it was still a work in progress. A few armchairs and couches were arranged in the center of the room, next to a coffee table with mugs and cute post-its with inspirational quotes on them.

These post-it were scattered everywhere, on the chairs, on the table, between the pages of the books. They were cheesy and sometimes did’t make sense, trying to encourage sinners to discuss about books and share their ideas. Lucifer couldn’t help but smile every time he saw one, thinking about his daughter and her good naive heart.

He found solace in that place.

He went there by chance once, after finding himself wandering around the Hotel trying to run away from the mean words screaming inside his head. After that it had quickly become an habit to go there during the night, past the time when Angeldust or Husker would still be awake, in that limbo halfway between the night and the morning, when the lights of Heaven were still not visible, but they started to peak between the clouds.

It was always quite when he went there.

No thoughts, no worries.

“When you’re feeling lonely, ask for a friend to join you! Having friends is fun! -Charlie”

Night after night Lucifer had been dragging himself into the library, reading books in silence to quite the thoughts screaming into his head. As a result he hadn’t slept in weeks, but on the bright side he also hadn’t had a nightmare in a long while.

Everything was perfect before his little ritual got ruined by none other than Alastor. That bitch.

Alastor was already there when Lucifer arrived. He was standing next to a shelf, hand ready to grab a book when their sights intertwined.

Everything felt static for a second.

Lucifer was about to ask him what the Hell was he doing there, but his mind was too clouded and words felt heavy on his chest. They just proceeded to ignore each other, much to his confusion: that demon was known for loving to mess with him. Why wouldn’t the dear say something?

But he didn’t dwell on it too much though, hoping this would be a once in a lifetime situation

Unfortunately for him he was quickly proven wrong.

The next day Alastor was there, a book in one hand and a cup of tea in the other, and so the following day and the one after.

Every single night Lucifer wanted a bit of peace, a place to recollect his thoughts, Alastor was there to ruin his evening.

He wouldn’t talk, but he would raise his eyebrows at every book Lucifer chose. He would turn his pages quicker than the king, creating an unspoken competition to finish first.

Lucifer came out of these nights even more exhausted than before, crashing onto the bed and waking up a few hours later, after a dreamless sleep.

“Good actions don’t need words! Try doing something good without taking the credit! -Charlie”

Lucifer had to admit something: having Alastor in the same room while dark thoughts stomped on his head was kind of therapeutic - although he would never say it to the other.

He always managed to distract him, even if it was with childish challenges and mischief, such as changing the place his current book was placed or steal the book the other wanted to read.

Words never left their mouths while they were there. They would stare at each other for a few seconds while entering the room, and then proceed to read in their designated spots: Lucifer on the couch, legs stretched on the coushions, his duck slippers on the floor next to him, and Alastor on the armchair, with his old school red nightclothes on and a tea cup in hand.

Lucifer started to think about those nights of theirs during his day, napping during the afternoon so he would be able to actually enjoy his silent time with the man.

Nothing had changed in front of Charlie or the Hotel crew. They would still bicker and fight like they hated each other, but he couldn’t help but thinking that he felt their arguments less animus than before. There were times he would find Alastor staring at him, his usual grin a bit softer on his lips.

He started looking forward to the night, feeling his heart pounding in his chest before opening the door of their secret place, hoping he wouldn’t be alone.

The reason was simple: he had spent the majority of his existence feeling alone, feeling casted out. The one who fell, the one who asked too many questions, the one who couldn’t handle a family. The one nobody really cared about and that frankly was had stopped caring.

But having someone share his worst moments with was… kind of comforting.

Then again, Alastor was still a peace of shit.

“When others choose to wrong you try confronting them with their actions! You might find that it was a misunderstanding! -Charlie”

It started after one of their fights during the day.

Lucifer wasn’t really sure what they were fighting about, but he could proudly remember how the argument ended: with him making fun of the deer. Angel had laughed, chanting a “Poor Bambi”, a nickname that was usually used by the former heavenly creature but was quickly catching up.

When Lucifer arrived at the library Alastor was already there - that wasn’t uncommon - but he wasn’t in his usual standing position, looking for a new book to devour in a few hours. This time he was in his armchair. Waiting.

Lucifer faltered before entering, a weird uneasy feeling slowly creeping behind his neck. He knew something was about to change.

He barely had time to pick a book and sit before shadows in the room started to morph, trembling and deforming the floor. The lights wobbled as if there was a earthquake (a hellquake?) and Lucifer would have probably screamed if only it hadn’t lasted more than just a few seconds.

Terrified and confused Lucifer stared at Alastor, forcing his mouth to remain shut, and found the sinner grinning ear to ear with pure amusement in his eyes.

As Lucifer started reading, one of those weird dark tentacles darted through the air right in front of the angel’s face, making him jump on the couch and drop his book. Needless to say Alastor was beaming in his place on the armchair. His stupid cup still in his hand, held with his pinky finger up.

Lucifer’s eye started to twitch. He wasn’t going to be the one breaking their pact of silence - ironic how that agreement was made… silently.

Alastor’s shadow retreated quickly with a book, only to dart back again, this time taking the most inconvenient road, purposefully knocking Lucifer’s book again the second he picked it up.

This did get a silent sight out of the king of Hell.

But the demon did not care enough to take his eyes off the tome.

This new annoying habit seemed to amuse Alastor a lot since he started to do it every single time they were there: Lucifer would arrive, think that nothing was wrong only to find a dark shadow scaring both Heaven and Hell out of him.

Three nights in a row and Lucifer was done with this.

He was the King of Hell, he was a powerful and fearful being: he was going to show it to that pompous prick.

When the tendril flew in front of him he moved quickly, grabbing the shadow with one hand, his eyes turning red and fire sparkling between his horns.

The movement was so fast that Alastor was caught off guard, but he was definitely impressed.

His cheeks burned bright as his smile trembled.

Since that day he never tried to use his shadows again.

“Hug someone today! Only after they agreed. Consent is important! -Charlie”

After the event nothing really changed, other than a small, but definitely important thing: they started greeting each other with a smile. Which wasn’t unusual for Alastor, since his smile was always shown on his face, but it felt as if that mask was slowly crumbling down.

Not only this, but Lucifer started looking forward to that smile, to that small act of kindness and intimacy the two of them shared.

And then one night came the touching.

Lucifer had seen Alastor touch pretty much every single hotel guest. Squeezing shoulders, pinching cheeks, being affectionate in a mocking kind of way, always using either his hands or his shadows to assert his dominance. And the king of Hell hated that behaviour: Alastor didn’t care if he crossed a boundary, he showed everybody that he could do whatever he wanted with them, regardless of their comfort.

The first time Lucifer and Alastor shook hands the latter cleaned it right after, so you can imagine how surprised and confused Lucifer found himself when Alastor decided to sit next to him, grazing their legs together.

His stomach churned and his head turned immediately to stare at the demon.

Alastor didn’t talk - again, nothing unusual for them in that room - but his smile twitched a bit.

Was he making fun of him? Was he trying to distract him from one of his schemes? Was he trying to get him back from the shadow situation?

The touch lasted a few seconds before Alastor repositioned himself, crossing one leg over the other, one foot making contact with Lucifer’s leg.

The king was so confused he didn’t flip a single page the entire night.

“Be sweet, be kind, be good! -Charlie”

Alastor started being more and more intimate with Lucifer.

He started offering him his tea by preparing two cups before the king arrived. He covered him with a blanket whenever he fell asleep on the couch.

It stopped being subtle when the cuddling started.

It had already been a few nights of sitting one next to the other, thighs or feet touching and eyes wandering over each other. The deer would casually touch him by grazing his hands, or by putting his hand on the king’s tight as a leverage to stand up.

But one evening his hand simply remained on the king’s leg. Fingers slowly moving. Before Lucifer could react Alastor was caressing him, as if they had been friends for their entire lives.

It lasted a few seconds - as soon as Lucifer’s brain registered the warmth it was already gone.

His heart was pounding in his chest, butterflies flapping their wings in his stomach. He felt lightheaded.

Whenever Alastor showed signs of kindness he felt like a young angel again, experiencing emotions for the very first time.

He’d find himself with golden cheeks and shaking hands.

And one night, after thinking about it the entire day, he finally made his move.

Alastor was already in the library, sitting down on the couch, nose buried in a book, his ears twitching every now and then, as if they were part of the action written on the pages.

Lucifer took a couple of breaths, trying to calm his nerves as he found the courage to sit down and take Alastor’s hand.

The action was very… awkward.

They stayed there in silence, staring at each other’s eyes while holding hands as if it was their first interaction since being created.

When he realised the absurdity of the situation his cheeks became golden. He tried to stand up again, ready to leave the room but Alastor tightened his grip.

He tilted his head as the touch morphed.

Alastor intertwined their fingers as nothing weird was happening.

Lucifer felt like falling for perdition all over again.

“Laughter is the best medicine! Laughing with your friends is the best antibiotic! -Charlie”

Six months had passed since the first time the two creatures had found themselves reading together.

Six months and nothing had changed: the hotel members still thought they hated each others - although Angel started whispering about the weird intense looks they sometimes exchanged.

Six months and, at the same time, everything was different.

Alastor and Lucifer had started by pestering each other every day and were now cuddling on the couch, Alastor’s hand scratching the king’s back, as the man had his head on the other’s lap.

They both pretended to read, but they would spend the majority of time plotting the next move, plying a game of chess to become more and more intimate.

Six months and not a single word had really left their lips. Until that day.

Alastor’s fingers were being gentle on the man’s soft pyjamas, soothing the skin underneath.

A bit too delicate for Lucifer’s taste.

Goosebumps were starting to form on his back and a maddening sensation was making him uneasy.

Al’s nails circled around the middle of the back, running up and down, switching between one finger and all four.

Lucifer was holding on, concentrating on not making a sound, focusing entirely on keeping his mouth shut.

He twitched when he felt the sensation move closer to his side. He gulped down some air and the bit his lips.

Alastor was reading, not realising the torture the other man was enduring. He was absentmindedly cuddling him, too focused on the words he was reading to notice the torture his ‘friend’ was enduring.

His fingers found the softness of Lucifer’s sides.

The king lost his battle.

A single uncontrollable giggle. So desperate to leave his lips, so cruel, so… liberating.

It was the first time Lucifer had made an actual sound in that place.

Alastor’s ears turned and his interest peaked.

His mouth opened, as to comment, but then he closed it, an evil grin on his face as soon as he realised what was happening.

This was interesting.

Lucifer’s eyes widened. He wanted to scream but he couldn’t. He tried to sit down but Lucifer’s fingers travelled back to his skin, scratching and caressing teasingly his sides.

Lucifer put his hand on his mouth, feeling the giggles build up in his throat. His legs started shaking, his torso twitching, anything to stop the sensation.

He slowly lowered his hand, his mouth ready to talk for the first time but when the other demon realised what was happening he stopped immediately his attack.

He got a bit closer, breathing Lucifer’s air, and he out a finger on his pale lips.

So this was how it had to be: defeat at first word.

Lucifer gulped loudly.

Alastor’s fingers went back to work, ready to pinch his sides but the only thing they found was air and dust.

In a puff of glitter Lucifer transformed into a snake - he was still Lucifer Morningstar, the most proud being ever created, if he could run away from this humiliation he would - but Alastor reacted quickly and one of his shadows manifested around his tail, snatching him off the floor. He transformed back into his demon form, dangling upside down with his foot held by the tentacle. His face morphed into a “Are you kidding me?” kind of expression.

Alastor left his place from the couch, facing his victim. He looked composed - as always - but a glint of mischief shined in his eyes.

He was going to destroy him. Lucifer shivered as he watched Alastor’s hands caressing the air around his body, not picking a particular spot, but letting him suffer through his indecision. As Lucifer started to thrash around, thinking about how to run away again his shirt rose up and Alastor eyed his midriff with interest. Lucifer’s mind panicked so hard that he transformed into a bird and immediately tried to fly away.

But again, his opponent was very determined.

He reappeared right in front of the door - his only way out other than the very closed window - with a wider and more menacing grin. Lucifer crashed right into him, reappearing as his usual form in a cloud of sparkles.

Alastor didn’t leave him a single second to think this time, trapping his wrists with one of his dark shadows and heading them above his head.

His stomach was again in a very vulnerable position, since his shirt had risen from all the tossing around. He had a trembling smile on his face, giggles almost leaving his lips just because he could feel Alastor stare at his body.

Probably because of this expectation he would have never anticipated fingers gently caressing one of his underarms.

Lucifer gasped and a weak groan left his throat. The touch was gentle, delicate, the fingertips tenderly swirling on his armpit. And it was so, so, devious. He started drumming his feet on the floor.

His mind kept repeating a series of “no no no no” and “okay okay okay” that he would have said out loud to distract himself hadn’t there been that stupid game of silence between them.

Lucifer tried to think of all the way he could turn the tables, tried to think how to attack him but he lost it when Al started tickling his other armpit too.

His giggles started dancing around them, uncontrollable. He couldn’t run away, he couldn’t ask for him to stop: he could only laugh.

Alastor grin widened, but he didn’t change the pace of his attack: he was going to be ruthless and methodical.

As the fingers teased his armpits, two dark shadows descended on his ribs, tracing small circles on the bones, making the fallen angel hiccup with laughter.

Lucifer really lost his battle, twisting his body to run away, too busy laughing to concentrate on shapeshifting. It was unbearable, a slow torture he knew he couldn’t endure by just letting himself laugh.

To confirm his suspicions, the moment Alastor brushed a single finger on his stomach he really gave up.

«Wahahaait!»

The room fell silent again. Alastor stopped moving. Lucifer stopped laughing. The books seemed frozen on their shelves, and the air was eager to listen to words.

«Your majesty,» it wasn’t an insult, but it wasn’t meant as a title. The king’s brain stopped working as a goldish blush dusted his cheeks. He was not expecting those words and he was not expecting to react that way. «we’re in a library. Noise should be kept at a minimum.»

Okay, he was going to kill Alastor.

Sweet golden laughter poured out of the angelic creature as the demon attacked his stomach. His fingers caressed his navel, pinched his sides, walked around his skin.

He was so light that Lucifer felt conflicted about what to feel, as if this wasn’t a kind of torture to him but was a weird act of kindness.

«Alastohohohor-» he got lost in his laughter. Giggles and high pitched squeals echoed in the darkness of the room. He realised his hands were free to move the moment he found them holding onto Alastor’s wrists, not quite pushing him away, not quite remaining still. He wasn’t sure about what he wanted to do.

«Ahahahahl» he put one hand on his mouth only to slam it back again as a tendril attacked him on the armpit. He laughed louder, feeling every part of his being ticklish.

It felt embarrassing. It felt private. But it felt… safe.

They were alone in their personal room where no one could bother them.

He giggled louder: «Ahahahahllll! I- ihihi- I demand you to stohohohop!».

Alastor grinned.

«Why should I? My king didn’t seem to mind my hands on his body before.»

«Ahahahahalasthohohor!»

«What my dear? Isn’t that true?»

Lucifer dissolved in another fit of laughter as Alastor lovely pinched every bit of skin he could find from his sides to the middle of his navel.

As hiccups started to leave the king’s lips the tickling slowed down.

«Have you had enough my dear?»

Lucifer could only nod, titters leaving his throat.

Red lights stared shining through the window.

Lucifer sighed, laughter tinted on his lips. He stared at Alastor: he looked bright, shining of a unique and mischievous light that only he could radiate.

They were very close, Alastor on him, hands holding him still. Lucifer’s skin was still sensitive, at every little movement he felt like starting giggling again.

Their faces were few inches apart, so close they could feel the warmth of each other’s breath.

Lucifer found himself staring at the other’s lips; only to realise he wasn’t the only one.

It felt as if they were getting closer, as if he could taste Alastor’s lips had he only moved a bit.

«I guess I will see you tomorrow my dear.»

And just like that he was gone

“You can find friends everywhere! Even at the library! Ask the person next to you what are they reading! Who knows what might happen! - Charlie”

That night Lucifer arrived at the library before Al.

He arrived before midnight. Angel and Husk were still at the counter, chatting and giggling together. They greeted him, but he was too distracted to care.

He sat on the couch, twisting his hands and waited.

When Alastor arrived the king was so nervous he could hear his heart pounding in his chest.

He immediately stood up, eager to talk right away, but Alastor went straight to the shelves, picking a book up.

Lucifer was confused to say the least.

Alastor sat down and started to flip pages as if nothing had happened between them the day before. When he picked his cup up Lucifer became furious.

«Are you kidding me?»

The sound of the king’s voice made Alastor jump. He probably thought that their pact of silence was back on because he looked confused.

«Is there anything wrong sir?»

Lucifer was fuming.

«I thought-» he shook his head and tried again «We’ve been coming here for six months. You’re the one who started messing with me. I came here just to read in peace and you-» he had to take a moment to recompose.

«I was fine. Then you arrived and disrupted my peace. You started to get closer and at first I thought it was to mock me but then… it seemed like you cared.»

Alastor sat there, staring.

«I thought you were starting to like me. I know in front of everybody you were your usual bitch self but- but here, here you were sweet and kind and.. and you started getting closer, touching me, putting your hand on my shoulder and- and yesterday I thought..» he put his fingers in his hair.

«Yesterday I felt something. And I know you felt it too because you were giving me that weird specific smile you have when you are actually happy and.. and now you just sit there, drinking your stupid tea and reading your stupid book as if nothing happened. And you have the courage to ask me if there is something wrong?»

Lucifer was out of breath, hands shaking.

It took the deer a few seconds to take it all in. Then he slowly closed his book, put his cup down and got up.

«Six months ago I came here to annoy you.» he began «Charlie told me that she was worried about you and asked me to check on you, as if I was some kind of nurse. My original plan was to hide every book you were reading.» he softly smiled avoiding the other’s eyes.

«But then when I saw you the first night you arrived... You looked miserable my dear. Charlie was right, I just couldn’t take advantage of a helpless puppy like that.» he tried to joke around his feelings, but the nickname didn’t feel derogatory as probably intended.

Alastor stood up and turned himself towards the books. He talked slowly, but each word was tinted with honesty.

«I decided to keep you company, to keep an eye on you so that if I helped you you’d be in debt. But then you started being… you again. After a few nights of pestering you I saw your face changing, I saw your smile coming back. And I found myself waiting for those moments.» he sighed facing Lucifer who was so shocked he didn’t know how to react.

«I am- I am sorry for hurting your feelings: that was not my intention.» his sight finally met Lucifer’s «But I wasn’t toying with you. Even if it started like that: adter all it was endearing to see you embarrassed.» Lucifer rolled his eyes at that.

«But I soon realised I wasn’t just having fun though: I was seeking out these meetings. Suddenly I found myself thinking about you during the day. Hoping we would fight so I could spend more time with you.»

Alastor feelings were shining around them now, dancing through the space between their bodies.

«It took me a while to understand and accept what was happening. And then yesterday when you were adorned with the most beautiful smile I felt something I thought I would never feel. Something resembling… more than just affection.» he whispered.

Lucifer felt himself moving without being able to control the motion. His hands brushed Alastor’s hands and their eyes locked just like the first day there.

Their library. Their sacred and demonic place. The only room that saw them as friends.

Everything felt so distant, but so alive, buzzing with energy.

Alastor took his hands, but Lucifer was the one who closed the gap between their lips.

All those days spent bickering, arguing over stupid shit, fighting one against the other, only to be defeated by a small environment full of books.

The kiss was small, soft, more than just brushing their lips, intense but not overwhelming. It was everything Lucifer needed to remind him how to breathe, how to feel, how to live.

It tasted like rivalry and play, like mischief and honesty. It simply tasted like them.

They smiled at each other, Lucifer’s hands shaking.

«Shall we go back to our readings my dear?» Alastor asked. He seemed composed as always but a hint of blush was dusted on his cheeks.

«Yeah, of course.»

Before leaving, Lucifer found a new little note on the table. This time it wasn’t on the usual yellow post-it.

Charlie’s words were written on a heart shaped red card.

He smiled before leaving the room.

“May this library always bring joy and love to whoever needs it.

P.s. love you dad

-Charlie”

~~~

This message is for AnonEmu. I really hope you like this fic, I swear I tried to honour your prompts, and I hope the length of the it didn’t scare you.

When I first read your pairings I thought about writing for a lee!Alastor ler!Vox fic but honestly I’m so happy I changed my mind.

Trying to write a cute, fluffy and lovingly tickle scene between two of the characters that hate each other the most was challenging, but this gave me the opportunity to actually focus on the story and not just the tickling part, which I realise it’s quite short, but I really hope you can still appreciate it.

The characters are probably a bit OOC but I swear I tried to give them at least the right vibes.

Having said that, I really have to thank you AnonEmu, I really want to thank you for your prompts, and I really really really want to thank @cantsaythetword. You’ve been an amazing host, you’ve done so much and you deserve all the love and recognition in the world.

Now you probably wont see or hear from me for a few months, but I wanted to thank all the people who reblog, comment or like my art and writing.

You make me proud of my work.

#tickle fic #squealing santa 2k24 #squealing santa #ss2k24 #hazbin hotel tickle #this fic took so long I honestly can’t say if I love it or hate it

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