#this project is meant to take months but it'll really be fun once the new pack comes out and these lots are multi family

[nihilismtrcit]

hiiii i miss yall <3 and im hoping to be a bit more active on here now that i have a project i'm working on!

i'm back at my cyberpunk save & i wanna document the process. i'm adding multi-functional lots from the gallery to san myshuno. current MINISCULE progress ⬇️⬇️⬇️ there's soooo much to fucking do lol

[sumeragi-hokuto]

I fully understand if it’s impossible but do you plan on finishing this project?

Hi to you and everyone else still following this blog. It's probably been what, almost two years since I last posted anything?

Short answer: probably not, though I want to.

Long answer: So a lot happened. I got my laptop back after the water damage and everything was wiped. Everything. Not just TB. I DID have some backups of the raws for volume 5, but I lost the rest of the completed pages that I'd been working on which put me back several weeks. Combine that with the stress of starting a new semester of college with a broken laptop, in a new place, with COVID messing everything up... I basically lost all motivation to keep working on TB. Time passed and I got more and more guilty about not posting, so I told myself that I would just work in larger batches that meant when I did post, I could post a ton in order to make up for all the time when I did not. Of course, that started to stress me out too, and so all it meant was that I kept delaying everything even more because the idea of doing MORE than usual after being gone so long was so daunting I couldn't bring myself to make the first step. Time passed. I got a job and was doing both school and work, which took a lot of time, and ended up committed to a group that took 9 hours per week minimum. The semester went by, and the next, and then was my final semester and my thesis. Keep everything from before and add in *that* time commitment...

By the time I was ready to get back to TB, I'd graduated. And my school pulled my Photoshop license basically the second my diploma was in hand. Buying Photshop will take me $22-35 a month, and Adobe is so weird with their commitments and forcing you to keep it for a long time or putting a cancelation fee on you that I keep worrying I'll miss something in the fine print and end up having to pay way more than anticipated. So basically, trying to get Photoshop back would cost a lot of money that I don't exactly want to pay given how long I think it'll take me to do these scans. It's just me working on this. There is no one else. I have a lot of things I want to do in my life, and paying for another year or two of Photoshop will put me out a few hundred bucks that I would like to put in savings. I guess I could really buckle down and try to get huge chunks done at once, but I need some other life things to calm down a bit.

If this seems like excuses excuses...yeah. pretty much. I have a million excuses and none of them are great. I loved this project and it brought me a lot of joy, but now I've come to a financial decision that has kept me from coming back to this.

That and the other big thing, which was the idea of "Oh. Maybe I shouldn't be doing this." Because while I may not be earning any money by doing this, I'm also not paying anything to do this. The profits aren't going to CLAMP or anyone official. People are reading their material without them earning a single penny. And sure, I read every CLAMP manga I've ever read on unofficial online sites before buying them myself (so, I read without paying before I fell so in love that I did). But should I be doing this? What happens if CLAMP or whoever owns the licensing does a crackdown one day?

I'm already so far in it probably doesn't matter. I'm not going to go delete everything I've ever posted. So why not just finish what I started?

I think it comes down to shoving down the guilt of the absence and the worry of whether I should or shouldn't be doing this and figuring out financially (and time-wise) if it's truly worth it. Like I said, I loved this project. I love TB. I have a ton of fun making the pages. But it takes a lot. It will take more from me now than it ever has with the added financial burden and the fact that I have way more commitments than I did when I started (which was, I think, actually in high school. And here I am now with a college degree and a real world job).

So that's the long answer: Will I finish this? I don't know. I really want to. I just need to figure out a way to make it work. That'll require some shuffling on my part. Some figuring stuff out. Some weighing my options. I can't say yes because I don't want to promise something and not give it, which has historically been what I've done when promising more frequent updates that never increased in frequency.

So to both you and the few other people who've messaged me in this long gap, or to the ones who said such nice things when I first mentioned my broken laptop and losing everything and all the kind of sucky stuff that happened nearly 2 years ago now...Thank you for caring. It does mean a lot. It's really nice to know that people actually appreciated the effort I put in, and that they're still thinking about me (or at least, about what I can do for them). I've never stopped thinking about this blog. I used Photoshop for my thesis and every time I opened it I told myself, "maybe next time I open this will be for TB." It even was. I think I did one more set at some point, never posted because of that thing I mentioned about feeling guilty and wanting to make a mega post.

With that I'll finish off for now. Apologies for the giant blob of text. I don't feel like proofreading this right now. I still have stuff I need to get done today. Real life calls. I hope that one day I will be able to get back to this. I'm just not sure when, or if it's even feasible.

Thank you,

Mariyekos.

[cosmicrew]

Close your eyes, take a deep breath, follow your intuition and choose the pile that calls on you! You can also use your pendulum, whatever works best for you. After you’ve chosen click on read more to read the message that’s meant for you. The reading is timeless so it's about the next two months from the moment you decide to do this reading.

Disclaimer: This is a general reading so take only what resonates for you intuitively and leave the rest.

Legal disclaimer: This reading is for entertainment purposes only and the user is responsible for their own choices and decisions.

Pile One: Something is ending. This can be literal (a relationship/situtationship that was toxic for you) or at a deeper level it shows the end of self imposed restrictions. If you are in a situationship that is unfulfiling for you or you are not being valued by your partner this shows that the veil will be lifted and your eyes will be open to what you really deserve out of a partnership. Once the veil is lifted and the disappointment and/or feeling of betrayal settles in you might feel hurt, but you will ultimately be able to set your standards right and value yourself more. Another possibility talks about you being closed off and hurt in the past, which didn't allow you to keep your heart open and to connect with others on a deeper level & show your vulnerabilities. These two months you will face situations brought to you by the Universe so you can see where your limitations and self restrictions lie and work on them in order to allow yourself to open up to the possibility of healthy love in the future. Affirmation: I always trust the direction of the Universe and know I'm being guided. Click here if you’re interested in an advanced personal reading

Pile Two: If you are in a partnership or situationship where there's a certain amount of imbalance (you are giving more than receiving or your partner is giving more than receiving) you need to work on that with your partner. There's a lot of fear here and there's lashing out because of your fears and insecurities - you might find yourself getting into fights with your partner or, if you're single, I see you hesitating to take up a new connection because of fears of the past (you might fear that the past could repeat itself). You might feel tired of short-lived flings and might want something more consistent in your life. However if a new person comes into your life and you are operating on the energy of fear, there's the possibility that you get triggered and end up projecting your fears onto the other person. It is important for you to consciously work on individuading where your issues lie and work on them and try to consciously open yourself up more. Affirmation: Energy flows where my intention goes. Click here if you’re interested in an advanced personal reading

Pile Three: Congratulations! You have progressed and taken steps forward on your self love & introspection journey and while this is a lifelong journey it is important for progress to be acknowledged. You are aware of where your fears and limits lie and are (and were) willing to work on them. If you were "betrayed/cheated on/lied to" or someone did you wrong in the past it's the time when "the score will be settled" and you will witness them receiving the karma they deserve. There's good energy coming your way, if you have felt a weight on your shoulders lately that weight will come off, you will be able to let go of some responsibilities and will be able to have fun. Someone new might catch your eye during this period! I see a spark being born through physical attraction at first and someone being willing to "court" you. Alternatively, there's the possibility of someone that previously did you wrong who comes back with an "offering" (that could be an apology, a gift, or both, or if they were "wishy washy" in the past they could be coming back to offer commitment). Affirmation: I recognize that I have chosen fear and I choose again. I choose love. Click here if you’re interested in an advanced personal reading

Pile Four: Destiny taking you by surprise. You might be feeling a little asocial this time, wanting to spend time alone and focusing on yourself. However, there's something (or someone) that you might have been manifesting coming into your life during this period! Whoever this person is that's coming into your life - it'll be kind of like lightning, kind of like they're shining a light through the shadows and that might take you by surprise. There's a potential for building a stable relationship with solid roots in the future. I see here that you will be able to connect mentally with this person a lot, communication might come easy between you two and there's the possibility that this person coming in is highly intelligent (and rational, very down to earth). Affirmation: My energy creates my reality. What I focus on is what I will manifest. Click here if you’re interested in an advanced personal reading

Pile Five: Forgiveness. You were either hurt in the past or you feel that you've hurt someone else in the past. Either way, I see you taking steps in order to heal, forgive your past and/or forgive yourself. I see you focusing on your own stability (emotional and/or financial) and finding upon yourself to move on from an unfulfiling situation (maybe one where you felt you were always at fault). It is time for you to accept your past, accept the choices and decisions you made with the knowledge you had back then, honor the way you feel and let those emotions pass through you so you can find peace inside yourself. This is a time for healing that will allow you to attract a lot of abundance (love wise but also financially). Affirmation: I honor how I want to feel. Click here if you’re interested in an advanced personal reading