#this point in anne's queenship in said book

[boleynqueenes]

The King and Queen are in good health. I came to the Court on Tuesday last about 3 o'clock. I was not there half an hour before his Grace sent for me into a garden which he has just made. He asked me heartily how you did, and whether the town was free from sickness and clean kept, of which I assured him. It would be well for you to speak to master Mayor for the mending of the two gutters from the market to Our Lady Church. If he lack paviours I can send them from London. The King is well conttented that his works go so well forward. I told him in the Treasurer's presence how much more is done in thickness than appears in the book, both in the two towers and the walls. The King is well contented with the pains you have taken about them and the sandhills, and is pleased with the conduct of his retinue, as I think they will see when he comes thither. I advise you to let the drags and ploughs go still upon the sandhills till you can shoot level over them from the mount at Becham Tower. I have not asked the King for wood or anything else, because the letters you promised to send have not come. I wish they were, for I trust to be shortly at Calais. As to my own business, the market was done before I came. We have a new lord Warden of “the Porche,” lord Rochford. (fn. 1) Sir John Dudley is master of the armery, Sir Antony Browne standard-bearer, and master Harper has the “awnage,” that is the sealing of the cloth in Kent. Has given her recommendations to the Queen, who asked heartily how she did and how she liked Calais. Can hear nothing of any false reports about her. Every man speaks of her good and honor, and almost every gentleman and gentlewoman in the Court ask how she does. Has not spoken with Mr. Kingston. He is at Wanstede with my lady, who is sick there. Will try and find out from him and others who they are that report about her ladyship. Will return shortly. Hampton Court, 11 June. Signed.

Sir Edw. Ryngeley to Lady Lisle. June 1534.

[wonder-worker]

#yes Elizabeth was without a doubt considered too low-born to be queen#no she was not a commoner and nobody actually called her that during her life (so I'm not sure why people are claiming that they did?)#Elizabeth's social status was not a problem in itself; it was a problem in the context of queenship and marrying into royalty#Context is important in this and for literally everything else when it comes to analyzing history. Any discussion is worthless without it.#obviously pop culture-esque articles claiming that she was 'a commoner who captured the king's heart' are wrong; she wasn't#But emphasizing that ACTUALLY she was part of the gentry with a well-born mother and just leaving it at that as some sort of “GOTCHA!”#is equally if not more irresponsible and entirely irrelevant to discussions of the actual time period we're studying.#Elizabeth *was* considered unworthy and unacceptable as queen precisely because of her lower social status#her father and brother had literally been derided as social-climbers by Salisbury Warwick and Edward himself just a few years earlier#the Woodvilles' marriage prospects clearly reflected their status (and 'place') in society: EW herself had first married a knight and all#siblings married within the gentry to people of a similar status. compare that to the prestigious marriages arranged after EW became queen

#and no Elizabeth having a lower social status was not 'created' by propaganda against her; it fueled and shaped propaganda against her#that's a huge huge difference; it's irresponsible to conflate the two as I've seen a recent tumblr post do#like I said she was considered too low-born to be queen long before any of the propaganda Warwick Clarence or Richard put out against her#and the fact that Elizabeth was targeted on the basis of her social status was in itself novel and unprecedented#no queen before her was ever targeted in such a manner; Clearly Elizabeth was considered notably 'different' in that regard#(and was quite literally framed as the enemy and destroyer of 'the old royal blood of this realm' and all its actual 'inheritors' like..)

#ngl this sort of discussion always leaves a bad taste in my mouth#because it's not like England and France (et all) are at war or consider each other mortal enemies in the 21st century#both are in fact western european imperialistic nations who've been nothing but a blight to the rest of the world including my own country#yet academic historians clearly have no problem contextualizing the xenophobia that medieval foreign queens faced as products of their time#and sympathizing with them accordingly (Eleanor of Provence; Joan of Navarre; Margaret of Anjou; etc)(at least by their own historians)#Nor were foreign queens the “worst” targets of xenophobia: that was their attendants or in times of war commoners or soldiers#who actually had to bear the brunt of English aggression#queens were ultimately protected and guaranteed at least a veneer of dignity and respect because of their royal status#yet once again historians and people have no problem contextualizing and understanding their difficulties regardless of all this#so what is the problem with contextualizing the classism *Elizabeth* faced and understanding *her* difficulties?#why is the prejudice against her constantly diminished & downplayed? (Ive never even seen any historian directly refer to it as 'classism')#after all it was *Elizabeth* who was more vulnerable than any queen before her due to her lack of powerful foreign or national support#and Elizabeth who faced a form of propaganda distinctly unprecedented for queens. it SHOULD be emphasized more.

people really do not know what they're talking about when it comes to Elizabeth Woodville's social status, huh?

[shalebridge-cradle]

Historical References in What Are You Going to Do With Your Life - Chapters 10-12

Chapter 10

Boleyn mumbles something about a priest. W. S. Pakenham-Walsh (1868 - 1960), Vicar of Sulgrave, Northhamptonshire, had a strong interest in Anne Boleyn. He claimed to have a series of spiritual experiences after praying at Boleyn’s burial site, and contacted clairvoyants to channel her spirit in the hopes she might become his guardian angel. He also claimed in his diary that he had contact with Henry VIII and other notable members of the Tudor court.

While witchcraft was often punished via the death penalty, Henry VIII made the law explicit in 1542 (though it was later repealed no later than 1547, under Edward VI). Several witchcraft laws were made in the UK over the years, in 1563, 1604, 1649 and 1735. These were all repealed and replaced with more general consumer protection laws, and the last person to be indicted for witchcraft (under the 1735 act) was imprisoned in 1944.

Tarot was a regular set of cards for most of its history, used in various, but similar, trick-taking card card games. It became associated with ancient wisdom in 1781, when Antoine Court de Gébelin wrote an essay claiming (with no evidence) that ancient Egyptian priests had distilled the mystical Book of Thoth into the cards.

“Psychic is Greek, and clairvoyant is French. One is about thinking, and the other is about seeing.” Psychic comes from the Greek word psychikos (‘of the mind’) and clairvoyance is a combination of two French words (‘clear’ and ‘vision’). Catherine of Aragon was known to speak both French and Greek, as well as Latin, her native Spanish, and English.

Cunning man (or woman) was another word for folk healers.

In 1532, Catherine Parr’s brother-in-law from her second marriage, William Neville, was accused of treason for allegedly predicting the king’s death and his own ascension as Earl of Warwick (a title made extinct during the Wars of the Roses, but would be recreated in 1547 and twice after that). He went to at least three magicians to confirm this prediction, all of which agreed that it was meant to be true (it wasn’t). One of these magicians was Richard Jones of Oxford, who was imprisoned and questioned on the matter. He did his best to exonerate himself of responsibility. I have found five references confirming his existence – but many of them claim he had a sceptre he used to ‘summon the four king devils’, which he used for divination purposes.

Chapter 11

Jones of Oxford was taken in for questioning as part of the Neville affair, and he did his best in his confession to exonerate himself. Neville’s claims of a prophetic dream showing himself as Earl of Warwick were now a “fair castle” which Neville assumed must be the castle of Warwick, and a shield with “sundry arms I could not rehearse”. He did admit to writing “a foolish letter or two according to [Neville’s] foolish desire, to make pastime to laugh at”. No treason, just jokes, please don’t execute me Thomas Cromwell. Jones claimed to take his alchemy seriously, however, and wrote that “To make the philosopher’s stone I will jeopard my life, so to do it,” if the king so wished. He would require twelve months “upon silver” and twelve and a half “upon gold”, and was willing to be imprisoned while he worked. Jones made a similar offer to Cromwell, but there is no evidence either man accepted. Jones was released in exchange for revealing incriminating evidence against another figure of interest. The other magicians caught up in this incident, William Wade and a man known only as ‘Nashe’, had perfected their disappearing act and were not sent to the Tower.

There is a story that Elizabeth I attributed the destruction of the Spanish armada in 1588 to John Dee’s wizardry. Given that, as mentioned, Dee was out of favour with Elizabeth at the time, this is likely untrue.

Elizabeth I’s death was in March of 1603, after she became sick and remained in a “settled and unmovable melancholy”, sitting on a cushion and staring at nothing. The death of a close friend in February of that year came as a particular blow – that of her second cousin and First Lady of the Bedchamber, Catherine Howard.

James I (or James VI, depending on where you’re from)… James I of England was also James VI of Scotland. His mother was Mary Queen of Scots, who was executed by Elizabeth I, and his great-grandmother was Margaret Tudor, Henry VIII’s sister.

“Anna, born Duchess of Jülich, Cleves and Berg.” This was how Anna signed hers’ and Henry’s marriage treaty, known as the ‘Beer Pot Documents’, because someone drew a stein at the bottom.

Bowling, as a game, can trace its origins back to ancient Egypt, and has been quite popular the world over throughout history. Henry VIII was an avid bowler himself (when Hampton Court was remodelled, bowling alleys were included with tennis courts and tiltyards), but banned the sport for the lower classes. The law against workers bowling (unless it was Christmas and in their master’s presence) was repealed in 1845.

We return to the ground, because from it we were taken. Paraphrasing of Genesis 3:19.

The (possible) first appearance of the word ‘alligator’ in the English language is from Romeo and Juliet. The description of The Apothecary’s shop mentions “a tortoise hung, an alligator stuff’d, and other skins of ill-shaped fishes”. Traditionally, medieval apothecaries and astrologers kept skeletons, fossils, and/or taxidermied pieces on display to demonstrate their worldliness.

The anger over calling the alligator ‘William’ could come from Parr, or from Anna. Her brother’s name, Wilhelm, is often anglicised as William.

Midsomer county does not exist and never has. It’s the setting for the long-running mystery TV show Midsomer Murders. Incidentally, Catherine Parr’s native county of Westmorland existed at one point, but no longer does (the area is now in the county of Cumbria). She is not the only English-born queen who this applies to; Jane Seymour’s Wiltshire and Anne Boleyn’s Norfolk still exist (and have since antiquity), but Katherine Howard was most likely born in Lambeth, which would have been in the county of Middlesex at the time. The area is now under the ceremonial county of Greater London.

“Honestly? Margaret Pole’s was worse.” Margaret Pole, Countess of Sailsbury and the last of the House of York, was kept in the Tower of London for two and a half years for her supposed support of Catholicism’s attempts to overthrow the king, before being informed of her death ‘within the hour’ on the 27th of May, 1541. She answered that she did not know the crime of which she was accused (and had carved a poem into the wall of her cell to that effect), but went to the block anyway. It allegedly took eleven blows from the inexperienced axeman to separate her head from her body. There is another story that she tried to run from the executioner and was killed in the attempt, but this is likely a fabrication. Regardless, pretty much everyone thought this was not only a bad idea on Henry’s part (killing Margaret removed any leverage the king had on her rebellious son, Cardinal Reginald Pole), it was also pointlessly cruel and a painfully undignified end.

(She was also Catherine of Aragon’s lady-in-waiting, and governess to Mary at several points.)

That everyone around her, bar a few visitors, would actively benefit from her death… Yet another quote of Elizabeth Tyrwhitt’s testimony: Parr, on her deathbed, claimed she was “not well-handled” by those around her; “for those that be about me careth not for me, but standeth laughing at my grief, and the more good I will to them, the less good they will to me”.

Chapter 12

According to a lady-in-waiting, Anne Boleyn claimed she would rather see Catherine of Aragon hanged “than have to confess that she was her queen and mistress”. This incident is probably the origin of the lyric “somebody hang you!” from Don’t Lose Ur Head.

Catalina uses a few Spanish phrases in this chapter, which don’t get directly translated. The first, No se hizo la miel para la boca del asno, directly translates to ‘Honey is not made for the donkey’s mouth’, and essentially means ‘Good things shouldn’t be wasted on those who won’t appreciate them’. Lavar cerdos con jabón es perder tiempo y jabón is ‘Washing pigs with soap is a waste of time and soap’, and is meant to indicate some things aren’t worth the energy.

…like that dream she has where she is cut up by a servant… An autopsy was done on Catherine of Aragon as part of the embalming process, which revealed the growth on her heart. This was done by the castle chandler (a dealer or trader) as part of his official duties.

Jane Seymour got rid of most of the hallmarks of Anne Boleyn’s tenure during her own queenship. The extravagance and lavish entertainments were banned, along with the French fashions Boleyn had introduced – including French hoods, which Boleyn is wearing in the portrait we have of her. Jane, as mentioned, wore a gable hood in her portraits.

“I don’t know why I’m so surprised that people care about what I say.” In the words of nineteenth century proto-feminist Agnes Strickland, Jane “passed eighteen months of regal life without uttering a sentence significant enough to warrant preservation”, which is kind of a mean thing to say. Seymour certainly said things during this time, we know this from reports, but there aren’t any direct quotes from her during her time as queen.

Here’s the painting mentioned, from 1545, during Catherine Parr’s tenure. Jane is on Henry’s left.

It was only after her death that Henry ‘loved’ her, but she is certain that he mourned for only for his own loss. There are reports that, during Jane’s labour, doctors advised Henry he might lose either Jane or Edward. Henry is claimed to have replied, “If you cannot save both, at least let the child live, for other wives are easily found.”

Countdown is a British television game show that revolves around word and number puzzles. It has been going for almost forty years, and is one of the longest-running game shows in the world, with over 7000 episodes.

“I saw a ghost bear kill someone, once.” Anne isn’t making this up. Supposedly, the incident occurred in 1816, when a Yeoman Warder saw a ghostly bear somewhere in the Tower of London. Terrified, he tried to stab it with his bayonet, only for the weapon to go through the image and strike the door behind it. The guard died of shock later on. A similar event happened in 1864, where two guards witnessed “a whitish, female figure” gliding towards one of the soldiers. The soldier in question charged this figure, only to go straight through it, upon which he fainted.

Elizabeth was imprisoned in the Tower of London for a little over two months in 1554, as a result of Wyatt’s Rebellion against Queen Mary. The rebellion was also the likely reason for the execution of Lady Jane Grey – both she and Elizabeth were Protestants in line for the throne, and therefore ‘more suitable’ as ruler. Both Elizabeth and Jane Grey denied any involvement, but the latter’s father and brother (also executed) were direct contributors.

“… you did die, Elizabeth was really upset about it…” Elizabeth took the news of Parr’s death badly. She refused to leave her bed, and was unable to go a mile from her residence, for five months following Parr’s passing.

Not because she liked that bearded potato man, God no… I found this deeply cursed engraving (first produced in 1544) in one of my books on the six wives, and now I want you all to suffer with me.

Anne of Cleves reacted poorly to being told her marriage would be annulled – some accounts say she fainted, others says she cried and screamed. Both could be true. The reasons given were threefold – One, the marriage was unconsummated (From testimony given by two servants, Anne thought a kiss goodnight counted as consummation – likely untrue, but this is the only reason that actually has merit). Two, Anne was precontracted to Francis of Lorraine (Untrue – the betrothal would only take effect if Anne’s father paid the dowry, and he didn’t). Three, Anne was not a virgin as claimed, based on the description of her ‘breasts and belly’, a Tudor way of saying Anne had previously given birth (untrue, and conflicts with the testimony for reason one). The annulment went through without Anne’s involvement, but (probably looking at the examples of her three predecessors) she accepted the ruling and kept herself from being banished, beheaded or otherwise.

(Other fact that has no bearing on reality – while researching Anne of Cleves, one of the pages that came up was The Simpsons Wiki. Apparently she’s the only wife who can claim the honour of having been in two episodes. :/)

Dogs don’t need to answer for their sins, they don’t have any. Katherine Howard was reportedly fond of animals in general, but had a particular soft spot for dogs.

She did the right thing. She told the truth. She died for it. Katherine Howard insisted, to the end, that she had no pre-contract of marriage to Francis Dereham. Would she have survived if she said she did?

[margarettudorarchive]

What are your thoughts on The White Princess in full now that it has aired?

In two words? Wasted potential. 

Most of my grievances have to do with the fact that the show resembled the book so strongly rather than learning from TWQ’s mistakes. I mean, Philippa Gregory clearly wasn’t as involved in the production of TWP as she was in TWQ; she’s said nothing on either her Twitter or Facebook accounts about the show, even while it was airing. Emma Frost still wrote for the show, but she proved willing to veer away from Gregory’s canon on several important points, most prominently the Perkin Warbeck storyline. Circumstances were perfectly in place for things to change for the better.  Instead, they changed for the much, much worse. 

First we have the rape storyline; like it or not, Henrat VII raped Lizzie. More importantly, however, he then goes on to have a booootiful marriage with her. Throughout their story, the implication is not only that a woman can fall in love with her rapist and it’s totally fine, but in some cases, if she doesn’t she’s just ungrateful and stubborn.“How dare Lizzie be upset her lover was killed and humiliated, and now she has to marry his killer? Stupid b*tch should have kept her legs shut” and “No wonder Henrat lashed out at her, she said mean things to him!” were pretty much the dominant attitudes towards Lizzie in the wake of the pilot. I’m not joking; I’ve seen people call her “b*tchy Lizzie”, complain that she whines too much (because her life has been stellar so far), roll their eyes at how dumb it was that EoY…wanted a love match? And fell in love with/slept with Richard?, all while being giddy over seeing their fave H7 on TV when in the pilot he’s pretty damn sulky too, and a rapist to boot. What’s between Henrat and Lizzie isn’t love, it’s Stockholm Syndrome–yes, even in the later episodes when they have ~hawt sex and cute domestic scenes together–but the show treats it as a romance and character development for Lizzie. 

Second, we have the characterization. I can’t think of anyone who’s consistently likable on the show: Elizabeth Woodville constantly schemes to put her son back on the throne, treating Lizzie’s queenship and children as a moot point and then getting surprised when Lizzie isn’t pleased; Margaret Beaufort is a hypocritical zealot who actually kills the love of her life; Margaret Pole acts like Lizzie should drop everything to put a man she’s not even sure is her brother on the throne instead of protecting her children and herself; Cecily of York is needlessly snotty, boring, and a sellout; Margaret of York only cares about a male York heir on the throne, and even sacrifices children and resorts to blackmail for this cause; Perkin and his wife, Cathy, are incredibly entitled in every way, yet somehow this entitlement is heroic and a virtue; Henrat whines about how haaaard it is to be king (seriously–no trace of the guy who had the BALLS to invade England and fight against a sitting king with years of soldiering under his belt), somehow never makes any solid policy decisions, and mopes that the woman he raped won’t do emotional labor for him on top of bearing his children and putting up with his BS; and Lizzie, who becomes so brainwashed she would sell her family to Satan for one corn chip, only knows the name of one of her children probably, and excuses everything Henrat does. How am I supposed to root for anyone? Why do I care who sits on the throne of England so long as one tolerable character comes into the mix? I can’t think of anyone who changes for the better; they either stay the same or deteriorate, and not in a deep, cool, Shakespearean tragedy way. The show doesn’t help matters when it sorts everyone into one of 2 camps: The Glorious Yorks Who Are Always Right and the Tooters. Even William Stanley wrote to Perkin promising support not because he’s playing the game and not keeping his eggs all in one basket but because he’s a Yorkist at heart who will die declaring for the true king of England. Riiiiight. 

Instead of doing everything Gregory did in her novel But Worse, Frost could have written about EoY coming to terms with a new regime and her place in it, building trust, affection, and even love in a marriage that was arranged and may have had a bumpy start–SANS RAPE, how deeply she cared for the children she was allowed to raise–especially little Prince Henry, her charity work/kindness, her feeling of being trapped between her (possible) brother and her children, etc. We could have explored EoY as a person, even following the essential formula of the book, but instead she becomes a twisted version of her previous self and a good portion of screen-time is dedicated to her poor hubby’s manpain and York worship. As a wise person once said, it’s not fair to call the show The White Princess when Lizzie is, at best, a side character. To add insult to injury, the whole debacle was wrapped up with a shitshow of a finale that offered literally ZERO resolution. Idk maybe I just had too high expectations for a Gregory adaptation, but I feel like asking for the shit u serve me to not be set on fire was pretty reasonable, and Frost limboed underneath even that low bar. 

One thing TWP did do better than TWQ was the costumes: they looked semi-period accurate, made of good material, etc. Even then there was that horrid football sleeve dress they put poor Lizzie in in ep 2, but tbf it was nowhere near as bad as the mustard vomit yellow dress Anne Neville had to wear to one of her weddings and her coronation in TWQ. *Kim Kardashian voice* tragic.