#this one is a mindfuck cause there is a fictional story of repeated betrayal and reconciliation that's obviously delicious and addictive

[otsukare-katsukare]

getting dragged ass-backwards into a new obsession is always such a trip cause for me there’s no consistency in quality or sophistication no matter what’s gone before. if the vibes are right and i can physically feel the thing filling out the little holes in my head and supplying energy to my blood then that is it, over for me. and when that thing is succession or the beatles it’s like being in a power couple, like i can say all the hyperbole i feel and it doesn’t feel stupid because the world at large agrees, and i know that i’ve dedicated my energy to something genuinely great. sure i have to affect some dumbassery to be like ‘my brain has been colonised by a tv show’, but at least it’s a tv show that has been compared countless times to shakespeare, you know. but then when it’s the gay pirate show or, wrestling, and it’s exactly the same emotional process, there’s a bit of my brain now constantly going omg stop stopppp this is dumb it’s not that good it’s not that deeep. but that doesn’t make a difference cause i’m still spending all those hours in the evening burying myself in the videos and the fic and the online community like a mouse that’s discovered a new kind of cheese and cannot get enough. or a new drug maybe. and when i walk around with the fresh obsession in my head it’s like the honeymoon phase in a crush with the sky looking just a bit bluer. like there’s really no feeling quite like it for me, and even knowing all the negatives associated with it (procrastination devastation, bad sleep schedule, annoying my friends for the next months-years) i just cannot fight the sheer giddy joy of wrapping myself up in a new obsession once i know it’s hit. and the absurdity of that process happening to me pretty much consistently every few months since i was eleven is really apparent when the thing i am wrapping myself up in is not kendall roy, top character of all time, and all the genuinely high quality fanfic succession seems to inspire, but undisputed tag team champions sami zayn and kevin owens.

tl;dr: “good for you or sorry that happened”