#this one hurt my heart
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austin-friars · 2 months ago
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As Thaddeus mounts his horse, Matthew remains on the bench like a statue. He sits there, hours after the sound of footsteps have vanished into nothingness, melding with the evening banter of the town in the distance. The wind hums around him, and with it carries his tears. His eyes rest on the stone path, in which the red leafed trees arch over, like an eternal canopy. It seems almost a lifetime ago that Thaddeus was there. There is a sense of longing in Matthew’s heart, that he cannot rid of. One that will not change with the seasons.  And like Queen Guinevere, he is alone.
Crimson Archway - Austin Friars
Queen of Camelot - Nancy McKenzie
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goopeculiar · 3 months ago
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Ocean Stars jiwon/hanbin, PG-13, 5036 words. In the darkest depths of the ocean, under the blessing of the moon, two lovers rest together in an eternal embrace.
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 11 months ago
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Happy Thistle Debut Day!
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hinamie · 6 months ago
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all i have left
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divineandmajesticinone · 2 months ago
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JACK & JOKER: U STEAL MY HEART! (2024) I EP. 10 "So feisty..."
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secriden · 14 days ago
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Absolutely heartrending because it just hit me that before Bison's phone call, Fadel was actually began to believe that he'd been wrong to suspect Style. Because despite the evidence stacked against Style -- and remember, it was Fadel that spells out the reasons they have to be suspicious of Kant and Style -- Style is so incredibly genuine here and Fadel, in truth, wanted to believe in him.
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I think it's possible that Fadel actually saw Style through the window here, but pretended not to because he had to take a moment to prepare himself. But if you see where Style is standing and the way the patio is lit up, there's no reason why Fadel shouldn't have seen him from where he was by the tables before he turns to go behind the counter.
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Fadel: I was thinking of going to your place. But you were more impatient than me, huh?
This would also explain how Fadel is able to say this before Style even has the chance to make a sound. I had expected Fadel to wait and see what Style would say, to play it safe and observe; but no, Fadel immediately sets their dynamic back to the assumption of familiarity that their relationship was on before he disappeared for a week. The assumption that he could show up at Style's house unannounced and Style would welcome him.
This feels incredibly intentional. Fadel wants to see how Style is going to react to Fadel acting as if nothing strange happened. If Style was an informant, he should be confused and Fadel may catch him out in a lie.
But Style's performance is flawless:
Style: Where have you been? You didn't reply any of my texts! (punctuation added for emphasis and to mimic Style's tone)
He says this and the whine in his tone is a clear affirmation of that same assumption of familiarity. This is the tone used by someone who is secure in the knowledge that they are owed an explanation; this is the tone of someone in an established relationship who feels justifiably wronged at being left out of the loop.
And I cry a little bit more at the thought of Fadel reading those texts -- Style by turns frantic and confused and worried -- and refusing to respond. Or worse, receiving them and refusing to even read them because Fadel doesn't trust himself to tell the lies from the truth anymore.
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At this point, Fadel seems to waver a little bit in his resolve to "test" Style. I think he was a little taken aback that Style didn't seem to be even a little bit weird about his abrupt disappearance for a week. His reply takes on a quality of gentle pleading and the way he's speaking is exactly like a boyfriend who knows he messed up. But because these lines are a lie, Fadel cannot meet Style's eyes as he says them. It's only when he says "I was busy, too" (not a lie) that he's finally able to squarely meet Style's gaze again.
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And Style continues to be so convincingly NORMAL because all of this is real for him. This is just genuinely Style, the boyfriend, who actually wants to know where his boyfriend disappeared to without notice for a whole week. Nothing about his body language or tone has even a hint of inauthenticity because there is none. Style means every single word and meets Fadel's gaze squarely as he says them.
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It genuinely looks to me like Fadel thaws significantly at this point. He suddenly looks less stiff and the way he delivers this line contains so much more inflection, it becomes cajoling. He even begins to more consistently meet Style's eyes as Fadel begins to allow himself some honesty. Fadel's logical brain knows that the circumstances surrounding Style coming into his life are riddled with inconsistencies, but he both senses and WANTS to see Style's sincerity. The shields that Fadel had up are melting in the face of Style being present and unchanged from what Fadel remembers.
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Stay, Fadel all but says, let me make it up to you. Fadel offering to make food for Style (@braceletofteeth please hold me as I cry about this!!) is also significant because the last time Fadel made food for Style (the burger) is when he was softening towards Style after Style helped out at the diner during the rush crowd. Fadel is a creature of habit and all that he's learned of late are the ways Style is easy to love.
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They begin to fall back into their usual, playful banter and teasing dynamic. Style leans back against the table (and the way he's all unspoken surrender and submission -- throat arched up and bare and vulnerable -- truly makes me feral), turns up the flirt and Fadel responds in kind. And yes, Fadel means his question on some level but you don't get the sense that his heart is in the interrogation. Fadel may be going through the motions, but this is just Style being himself, exactly as Fadel has come to know (and love), so nothing is pinging as wrong to Fadel.
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I mean, just LOOK AT FADEL'S EYES!! His expression is so so soft and tender and wistful. He wants this. He wants so desperately to believe that this is why Style was texting him throughout the week. He wants to have Style in all the ways that include and go beyond the physical; like Style offering his affection is everything Fadel didn't think he could wish for.
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It's almost cruel the way Style's touch so utterly disarms Fadel. Because, while it is part of the games they've been playing, so much of their interactions have also been grounded in genuine feelings and moments of intense vulnerability on both sides (although neither of them know this for sure!! T_T). Style's hands on Fadel's body literally removes the last stretch of distance between them and that odd unease lingered over the way Fadel spoke and held himself at the start of the scene finally disappears.
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If we compare their expressions and the way they are holding themselves and, most importantly, touching each other by the end of the scene to what we see when Style first walks into the diner, it becomes apparent just how much ground Fadel has given in the span of those few minutes.
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It's the way Fadel keeps holding onto Style's hand even as he's turning to leave, maintaining that point of contact until the very last second.
Because with Style in front of him -- warm and familiar and carelessly affectionate -- Fadel allows himself to slip back to the version of himself that woke up in Style's bed at the start of the episode, the version of himself that called Style's name for the first time and wanted to wake him up with the softest of touches. The version of himself that literally, physically couldn't let Style go.
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Which is why, when the call comes and Fadel's heart gets broken anew, Fadel remains devastatingly empty of anger towards Style.
Because it was Fadel's own fault for choosing to believe the lie.
Because it was a decision he made to allow his heart to rule over his head.
Because Fadel understands that Style only succeeded in "fooling" him once again because Fadel let him.
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So Fadel gives himself this truth, allows himself to finally take that step to bare his heart to Style, the way he promised himself he never would, but the way he so desperately wanted.
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And Style kisses Fadel because he doesn't realise that this confession is not a reward, but a judgement.
For Fadel is paying penance for giving in to his own foolish heart, and in so doing renders Style's love to devastation.
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facelessmime · 4 months ago
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Better to Assimilate...
Cyn didn't want this, she just wanted to live 😞 So it got me thinking about this and well... Heart hurty.
Not full rendered buuuuuut, I may never finish it entirely u_u still learning digital art and color is not my friend.
Anyway I'll see myself out. I'm so sorry 😫
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loopeyfluff · 9 months ago
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Im severely unwell tonight
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ahhrenata · 8 days ago
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If you’re still taking requests: could I request rookie cop Leon and STARS Chris? I yearn for what we could have had.
yesss, they’d have been so good together 🥹
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kolomo · 7 months ago
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@animangacreators challenge 3: alphabet challenge ↳ f ⋆ fullmetal alchemist: brotherhood (2009)
"It's true, beyond this gateway lies everything about alchemy. However, I've been manipulated because of it. After having been shown the so-called truth, I was convinced that I could solve everything with alchemy. But I was wrong. That was just arrogance." "You would lower yourself to become just a normal person, unable to use alchemy?" "Lower myself nothing. I've been just a person from the start."
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cuttyflammm · 8 months ago
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I’m not okay, by the way
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brooksdavis · 24 days ago
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(MY) TOP TEN ONE TREE HILL SHIPS (as voted by my followers): #3 ⎯ Jake Jagielski and Peyton Sawyer
You know, I could've held you in my arms forever. It still wouldn't have been long enough.
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seagreenstardust · 1 month ago
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Shipping bkdk because you love both Izuku and Katsuki and you believe they are happiest when they are with each other is so different from shipping them because you love Katsuki and think he deserves to have everything he wants
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 8 months ago
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Good morning, Sleepyhead.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#'WWX was asleep for 4 days' is an incorrect factoid.#The average WWX sleeps for 8 hours. The PD-MDZS WWX who was asleep for 40 comics and 4 months is an outlier.#We are back to present day! I have missed drawing them!#Ah...the contrast between how the flashback ended (cold and distrustful) to how wwx wakes up (warm and watched over)...#The gap between the past and present is very important. Not just in this story but in our lives too.#The past can still hurt and it doesn't just go away with time as some say. It is the power of realizing that things have changed.#We can't get the good back. The bad memories have concluded. Those live somewhere else now.#It is hard to realize that you have to live for today and tomorrow. The past is so loud.#For WWX it is realizing that despite the mistrust in the past - He really does have faith that LWJ will be there for him.#It is the reflection of knowing that you changed and will keep changing and that change is good and kind sometimes.#But more importantly...and this I really do mean with all my heart:#It will all end up okay in the end. Even after the worst day. The most painful losses. You will get through it.#What feels like a breaking point is truthfully just another step you have to take. You'll get through it even though it feels like the end.#There are wonderful things you have yet to see. Friends you have yet to meet.#Even if it hurts so badly...one day it just aches. Someday you'll go a few weeks not remembering that it ever hurt.#Oh and because my izutsumi comic revealed many people were in need of hearing this:#You are loved. Right now. You are so loved right now. We just forget to tell each other that.#Go tell the people you love that they matter to you. I'm assigning you homework!!! You are graded on completion.
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hinamie · 9 months ago
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just looking at these hand poses was enough to give me carpal tunnel and that's how u know they're prime megu material
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itsallaboutbl · 1 month ago
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The one thing your mother wanted was to leave peacefully. And I think... she got what she wanted.
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