#this kinda got long.....i'm so sorry i rly do not deserve rights

[nar-nia]

hi!

wow.

omg, its been so long since i spoke to you but a lot of happened in my life kinda (as well as yours from what i saw)

first of all, CONGRATULATIONS on finishing uni!!!!!!! im proud and happy for u!!! u worked hard and it paid off!! and wow, bakery?? that sounds so amazing!!!! like straight up bakery/coffee shops au!!! must be super fun and probably always smells rly good there!! i hope ure having tons of fun!!! and that ure eating lots of cake duh

for me, idk if u remember but i passed that oral exam!!! i did it in the beginning of september!! and i felt relieved and euphoric about it! and now the new semester (so my second year ) starts soon and…… i feel so anxious about going back, talking to people, all the stress and constant anxiety, and the fact that im still questioning whether this was the right thing to study and the lingering feeling that all my friends have it figured  out already with the life and im kinda stuck. like when its right u know? but idk ??

but on a more positive note? my summer was rly great overall so i hope urs was too!!!! im no longer a teenager tho 20 hits hard - especially after olivia rodrigos new album lmaoo

hee has purple hair now and he looks soooooo good!! ALSO  i read jakes and jays fics u posted and they were so nice, omg like???  :((( like made me realize how much i missed ur blog and u!!!!!!!!!!!

i love you, wishing u all the best always!!!!!!!!!!

                            -beloved anon wow it feels good to write it again!! <333

OMG HELLOOOO 🥺🥺🥺 it's been so long, i missed you so much. how are youu <333

please i'm so happy about finally finishing uni, it felt so long and annoying in the end. but now i already kinda miss it 😭

working in the bakery is.. interesting. it's definitely what i want to do in life, the other day i spent the whole workday just making cakes without anyone bothering me and i loved it so so much, but it's also hard and really stressful (which is why i am replying so late and i'm really sorry, first i got sick and then i got hit with a workload again 🥲). i have to do work that's supposed to be for like 4 other people and it's something 😶 let's manifest that they will find more workers soon because this is way too stressful for me (and my coworkers, i haven't seen them smiling in the past two weeks anymore, it's a bit scary). but enough complaining 🫡 the work itself is fun and the food is so good 🫠🫠 apart from onion cake/pie, i have to do it all myself and i swear i haven't stopped smelling like onions those past few weeks 💀

okay but now to you! CONGRATULATIONS ON PASSING YOUR EXAM 🥳🥳🥳 you did so well and i hope you're really proud of yourself 🥺🩷 and best of luck for your second year, i'm sure you will do as amazing as before 🩷

i'm sorry that you feel so nervous about it though. i have to be back in school to become a baker too now and i was so nervous on my first day, i got sick like right after 💀 and my class really is something (not necessarily positive but there are really nice people too). buuut i hope that your classmates are the nicest people you have ever met and that you will have lots of fun this year, you deserve it. and of course lots of amazing grades in your exams 🩷 i think if this bakery thing has thought me one thing is that it's okay to not know what you want yet. i think i have found my place now (although not necessarily in this bakery) but it took me a while to figure it out too. and in our bakery we have two people who tried lots of different stuff too before they settled on training there. so please try not to worry too much for now, i'm sure it will all work out well for you 🥺🩷

but i'm so glad your summer was nice <33 mine was full of job applications and moving but i still enjoyed it a lot (oh i miss the time where i could stay up all night and sleep in and not start work at 4am 💀) and happy belated birthday, omg <33 welcome to your twenties, it's a wild ride 😍

i missed you so so much too, i'm glad you liked my stories but even happier you had time to check in 🩷 but yes, hee 🫠🫠 wow. i love him (although he's not the only one anymore, can you believe?? jay has been bias wrecking me so hard i am so close to making him my second bias. that guy has me BLUSHING)

i hope you are doing well despite it all and will continue to do well 🩷 you deserve the best and you should get it. i love youuu 🩷🩷🩷

[eevyerndracaneon]

Hey, I don't mean to intrude or anything, being a stranger on the internet and all. Don't feel the need to answer this ask or anything but, I just hope you can hear me out and maybe something I say can help a bit... I've seen some of your posts today, I'm sorry you're going through the ringer. I've got a good couple of friends who deal with the very similar struggles and whatnot, so I just wanted to say pretty much what I always tell them regarding some of what you're feeling. I dunno your specific situation, and I know a lot of things are way more difficult to just outright fix than some people will say it is, so I'll keep this more general. And some of what I will say you might already know, but I feel they bear repeating. First off, your worth as a person is not tied to your ability to make money, or work a job or anything like that. You are a person, and that makes you valuable. No person or thing can ever take that from you. Second, never feel bad about wanting to interact with your friends and loved ones. Even if you're in a bad mood, I'm sure they'd love to spend time with you. Social needs are just as important as any other need, so do not feel guilty of them, and don't hole yourself up if that's not what you need right now. A friend of mine (and I do also to an extent) does this all the time and after they always reflect that it only hurt them.

Third, I'm sorry about whatever issues you're dealing with, with family or otherwise, I know how difficult that can be. There are no easy solutions, but, like, you just gotta keep carrying on, you know? Even if there's no option out today, there might be one down the road. On a lighter note, I think your art style is charming! I think you could get some commission work if that's something you wanted to do, it's less on your skill and more on confidence and a bit of luck, I think. Even if today sucks, it doesn't define you tomorrow and not all days will be like this. None of what you're going through defines you or your worth as a person. You've got this, and your friends and loved ones have your back. Keep on being you, A concerned stranger

ah right i did vent really hard on here huh, thanks for sending this out-

i've been vague overall with my posts bc im just going thru it today so some of what you've said doesn't apply but i can't fault you for it, since i didn't rly explain anything

i've tried for a few years now to have art as a job that i could maybe help pay for rent with if i ever moved out, but i just didn't get enough comms to even get to that point. u-u i'd LOVE to just draw for money but it just didn't rly work out the way i expected. maybe i'll give it another shot, i dunno (I'd have to increase my prices again for 2023....)

the house i live in rn is the one belonging to my partner's family. so i live with my partner. my boyfriend is long distance (i'm polyam if that hasn't come across with some of my posts) and i desperately wish i could live with him as well. my partner's family is amiable, but not exactly super friendly or welcoming. especially not if i was openly trans. (they have a trans daughter but refuse to treat her with respect so she cut herself out of their life years ago) my life is kinda trapped in my partner's room, in a corner, so i really don't feel like i have a home. it sucks, but at least im surviving and have a roof over my head and food to eat and warmth in the cold and cool in the heat.

you're completely right on the social front. i think a lot of us forget this. my boyfriend and a friend of mine both reached out to me an hour or so ago bc they were worried abt how i wasnt around like, at all, and i basically got the same thing from them. "its okay to be around, we can try cheering you up"

and finally the big one. i understand capitalism is trash for making us all think we need to make money to deserve life. i hate that i need to make money to be able to live on my own. luckily im not sitting here thinking im worthless solely bc i cant get a job or make money. but i need money to get a place to live in on my own, apartments need rent, houses need mortgage payments, and then food and bills and all that crap. i need a job for that to get pulled off. and i've been trying to get a job! i've been applying to places since the beginning of december! but no place has accepted me. i've gotten like three interviews. nothing else. its just really infuriating. all of my friends, even my boyfriend, are getting new opportunities, new places to live, new goals new motivations new everything. and im just kinda stuck.

today was really hard. all of these feelings welled up over the past half a year and i think just finally crushed me into the dirt today.

so its just kind of a sad day. im doing what i can now to make it better even if only by a little bit. but oof.

thank you anon for popping in and checking up on me, it means a lot <3

[nostallgias]

        ☆ . * (  kristine  froseth,  cis  female,  she  /  her  )  hey,  look  !!   indigo  ‘indie’  dahl  aka  @nostalgias  is  online  and  ready  to  write  another  anonymous  post  on  the  broken  hearts  club.  rumor  has  it  they’re  here  because  she  ran  away  from  her  hometown  to  escape  her  family  and  ex  lover.  out  in  the  real  world  she  is  a  musician  /  bartender.  the  22  year  old  is  known  for  being  flighty  &  impetuous  but  make  up  for  it  by  being  vivacious  &  determined.  if  they  were  to  describe  themselves  they’d  say  they’re  chipped  nail  polish,  lipstick  stains  on  cigarettes,  driving  with  the  window  down  and  their  favorite  song  is  gold  dust  woman  by  fleetwood  mac.

        hello  everyone,  i’m  so  happy  2  b  in  this  rp   !!!   my  name  is  diana,  i’m  twenty  yrs  old,  a  libra,  and  reside  in  the  est  timezone.  some  quick  facts  abt  me  ...  i  am  a  girl  group  stan  and  lana  del  rey  enthusiast.  i  also  luv  cats.  anyway,  enough  abt  me,  u  can  learn  abt  my  muse  indigo  under  the  cut   !!!   my  discord  is   missing blackpink hours#5522  so  pls  hit  me  up  there  or  in  the  im’s  for  plots   !!   i  cannot  wait  to  get  started  <3   tw:  briefly  mentions  alcoholism  &  drugs

☆ . *   𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒄𝒔    !

full  name :  indigo  dahl

nickname(s)  :  indie

zodiac  :  sagittarius  sun,  gemini  moon   (  click  )

sexuality  :  bisexual

alignment  :  chaotic  good

pinterest  :  click

☆ . *   𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌𝒈𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒅    !

indie  grew  up  in  a  small  town  where  everyone  knows  everyone.  she  was  restless  and  curious,  but  there  wasn’t  much  to  do  in  a  town  that  small

her  parents  were  really  big  on  music,  so  there  was  always  something  playing  in  the  household.  it’s  safe  to  say  music  took  over  her  life.  she  started  to  learn  guitar,  then  later  bass

but  sadly  her  dad  left  them  when  she  was  still  young.  she  wanted  him  to  take  her  with  him,  so  she  could  finally  get  out  of  that  stupid  town,  but  he  left  her  with  her  mother  and  never  looked  back  :/

indie  and  her  mom  didn’t  get  along  too  well.  she  basically  planned  indie’s  entire  life  out,  down  to  who  she  should  marry.  after  her  father  left  them,  her  mom  wasn’t  rly  able  to  cope  with  it  too  well  and  she  kinda  turned  to  drinking,  and  the  music  that  was  always  playing  stopped  :(

indie  spent  her  middle  and  high  school  years  taking  care  of  her  mom,  who  was  too  drunk  to  function  at  all  times.  she  couldn’t  keep  a  job,  which,  was  fine  at  first  because  indie’s  grandparents  (  her  mother’s  parents  )  were  fairly  well  off,  and  they  could  live  off  of  them

that  was  until  her  grandparent’s  cut  them  off  after  finally noticing  their  daughter  was  an  alcoholic.  so,  they  were  pretty  much  left  with  no  source  of  income

indie  started  working  as  soon  as  she  was  old  enough.  she  worked  two  jobs  in  high school,  which  didn’t  leave  her  much  time  to  focus  on  school.  she  never  cared  for  school  anyway,  her  focus  was  always  music,  but  she  didn’t  even  have  much  time  for  that  anymore

her  mother  seemed  to  have  a  new  boyfriend  every  week,  men  who  always  acted  like  they  were  here  to  say.  all  of  them  tried  to  control  indie,  but  she  resented  every  single  one  of  them.  she  could  see through  the  lies

she  spent  most  of  her  time  away  from  home,  she  didn’t  even  like  sleeping  there.  it  didn’t  feel  like  home  anymore,  and  it  hadn’t  for  a  long  time

one  day,  one  of  her  mother’s  boyfriends  actually  stuck  around.  indie  just  kept  waiting  and  waiting  for  the  day  he’d  leave,  but  he  never  did.  her  mother  remarried

after  remarrying,  her  mother  kinda  got  her  life  back  on  track  again.  she  immediately  went  back  to  trying  to  control  indie  again.  indie  absolutely  hated  it,  but  she  was  happy  to  see  her  mother  in  a  good  place  again,  so  she  tried  to  fit  the  mold  

indie  barely  graduated  high  school  and  never  went  to  college.  she  continued  working  for  the  next  few  years,  saving  up  money  and  working  on  music

she  started  dating  the  guy  her  mother  chose  for  her.  it  was  okay  at  first,  but  the  spark  was  always  missing.  the  longer  she  was  with  him  though,  she  began  to  realize  that  he  wanted  to  stay  in  that  stupid  little  town  forever,  and  the  idea  of  spending  the  rest  of  her  life  there  terrified  her  so  much  she  decided  to  runaway

so,  she  packed  all  her  things  and  ran  away  in  the  middle  of  the  night.  she  drove  through  the  night  to  find  her  father,  but  when  she  found  him,  she  learned  he  had  remarried  and  started  a  new  family

deep  down,  she  always  knew  he  didn’t  want  her,  otherwise  he  would’ve  made  an  effort  over  the  years.  but  she  really  had  to  see  it  to  believe  it

and  that’s  how  she  found  her  way  to  chicago.  she  never  told  her  mother  where  she  went,  but  she  knew  she  was  looking  for  her  and  so  was  her  ex

her  grandparent’s  send  her  money  every  once  in  a  while,  and  although  they  aren’t  close,  they  understand  why  she  ran  away  and  want  her  to  have  the  chance  to  start  fresh

she  stumbled  across  the  forum  one  day  and  decided  to  join  it,  because  she  was  starting  to  feel  a  little  lost  and  it  has  helped  her  a  lot

☆ . *   𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒚    !

indie  is  extremely  extroverted.  she  is  a  social  butterfly  and  will  befriend  literally  anyone.  the  tricky  part  is  getting  close  to  her,  though.  she  tends  to  keep  her  emotions  to  herself.  she  presents  a  version  of  herself  to  the  world,  one  who  is  always  happy  and  alive  because  she  thinks  that’s  the  only  version  of  her  that  people  will  like

she  has  such  a  curious�� soul  !!  all  she  wants  to  do  is  explore  and  experience  new  things,  so  she’s  always  down  for  an  adventure.  she  loves  a  good  party  because  she  loves  to  be  around  people.  she’s  a  social  drinker  and  drug  user  (  except  for  weed,  which  she  smokes  a  lot  )

indie  doesn’t  have  any  idea  about  what  love  is,  but  she  knows  she  wants  it.  she  wants  a  great,  interesting,  devoted  love,  but  is  having  trouble  finding  it.  so  she  tends  to  have  a  lot  of  lovers,  but  they  mostly  end  up  being  casual.  she  gets  bored  easily,  so  if  it  isn’t  exciting  at  all  times,  she  kinda  dips  akjsdhsdjhk  it’s  her  fear  of  abandonment  

she  is  obsessed  with  the  70′s,  from  the  music  to  the  aesthetics.  stevie  nicks  is  her  inspiration.  she  loves  music  of  all  eras,  though.  she  loves  thrifting,  and  her  style  is  heavily  influenced  by  70′s  fashion

she  can  be  pretty  spontaneous,  but  also  reckless.  she  wants  everything  in  life  to  be  an  adventure,  so  it  has  gotten  her  into  trouble  in  the  past

hates  authority  figures,  literally  she  has  so  much  trouble  with  respecting  authority  now  because  she  feels  like  she  wasted  her  entire  life  doing  that  for  people  who  didn’t  respect  her

has  a  hard  time  taking  things  seriously,  except  for  music  because  that  is  her  entire  life

☆ . *   𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅  𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔    !

party  buddies  -  they  always  go  to  parties  together.  maybe  they  don’t  see  each  other  outside  of  parties,  maybe  they  met  at  a  party  and  became  close  friends  afterwards

drinking  /  smoking  buddies  -  someone  she  can  drink  or  smoke  with.  maybe  they  have  a  more  casual  friendship,  but  anytime  they  hang  out,  they  share  some  interesting  conversations

confidant  - someone  who  confides  in  her  or  someone  she  confides  in,  or  they  confide  in  each  other.  they  don’t  necessarily  have  to  be  the  closest  friends  ever,  but  they  get  along,  trust  each  other,  and  maybe  they  talk  more  in  private

frenemies  - they’re  friends,  but  maybe  they’re  always  trying  to  one  up  each  other.  they  might  gossip  behind  each  other’s  backs.  sometimes  they  get  along  perfectly  well,  but  maybe  sometimes  they  get  into  stupid  fights

protective  friends  - friends  who  feel  extremely  protective  over  one  another.  indie  will  literally  fight  anyone  who  hurts  them

sibling-like  friendship  - indie  is  an  only  child,  so  i  would  love  for  her  to  have  someone  she  sees  like  a  sibling.  they’re  there  for  each  other,  look  out  for  one  another  and  always  have  each  other’s  backs

dynamic  duo  /  best  friend  - ride  or  dies.  platonic  soulmates   !! this  person  is  probably  the  closest  friend  she  has  and  actually  knows  her  well  !   a  power  duo

partner  in  crime  -  someone  who  always  goes   along  with  her  antics.  someone  who  she  bounces  off  of  and  they  do  dumb  /  fun  shit  together   !!!   her  adventure  buddy

online  friends  -  her  favorite  person  on  the  forum.  she  is  always  interacting  with  them  and  is  literally  always  the  first  to  comment  on  their  posts  or  something.  maybe  they  confide  in  each  other

bandmates  -  if  your  muse  sings,  plays  guitar,  bass,  drums  or  keyboard,  they  can  be  in  a  band !!!  indie  plays  guitar,  bass,  and  also  sings  so  she  can  do whichever  of  these  is  needed  !!  she  also  likes  to  compose  music,  but  with  bandmates  they  will  collaborate  and  make  stuff  together  of  course

groupie  love  -  i  didn’t  know  what  to  call  this  plot  so  pls  ignore  the  name,  i  went  for  a  lana  del  rey  song  title aksdhsdjkh  but  basically  maybe  ur  muse  was  there  at  one  of  the  little  gigs  she  played  and  they  became  acquainted  after  that  !!!  this  can  be  romantic  or  platonic,  we  can  plot  it  however.  but  maybe  they  keep  going  to  her  shows  and  she’s  always  happy  to  see  them

flirtationship  - they  flirt  constantly,  but  nothing  serious  has  come  out  of  their  flirting.  maybe  they  have  good  chemistry,  but  haven’t  really  tried  to  explore  it  further

ex-fling  - maybe  they  ended  things  more  recently,  or  maybe  they  ended  things a  few  months  or  a  year  ago.  they  could  have  ended  on  good  or  bad  terms.  maybe  someone  or  both  of  them  still  have  feelings,  or  maybe  they’re  just  friends  or  don’t  talk  now

current fling  /  friends  w  benefits  - someone  she  is  currently  seeing.  could  be  no  strings  attached,  or  there  could  b  some  feelings  there.  maybe  they  don’t  want  to  make  it  anything  serious,  or  maybe  they’re  ready  to  take  it  to  the  next  level.  maybe  one  person  is  ready  to  go  further,  and  the  other  isn’t

requited  /  unrequited  crush  - maybe  she  has  a  crush  on  ur  muse,  whether  it’s  a  deep  crush  or  a  more  surface  level  crush.  OR  ur  muse  could  have  a  crush  on  her  and  maybe  she’s  oblivious  to  it  !!!   maybe  our  muses  have  crushes  on  each  other   !!!  maybe  it  isn’t  super  serious,  or  maybe  it  is

will  they,  won’t  they  - there’s  feelings  between  them,  but  they  haven’t  made  the  plunge  to  pursue  whatever  they  have.  longing,  yearning,  lingering  glances

take  care  -  someone  who  looks  after  her  when  she  parties  a  little  too  hard   !!!   someone  she  trusts  who  keeps  her  out  of  trouble  when  she’s  under  the  influence  and  feeling  too  reckless  for  her  own  good

enemies  w/  benefits  -  there  was  always  underlying  tension  between  them,  even though  they  couldn’t  really  stand  each  other.  maybe  they  hooked  up  at  a  party  and  now,  despite  their  personal  feelings  towards  each  other,  they  still  continue  to  hook  up

cyber  sex  -  once  again,  i  didnt  kno  what  to  title  this  so  i  went  for  a  doja  cat  song AJKSDSJKH  but  basically  someone  on  the  forum  she  has  a  crush  on.  i  think  it’s  funny  because  she  has  noooo  idea  who  they  are  irl  but  maybe  they connect  super  well  online

ex-friends  - someone  she  used  to  consider  a  best  /  close  friend,  but  they  had  a  falling  out  for  whatever  reason  n  maybe  they  strongly  dislike  each  other  now.  maybe  they  want  to  re-kindle  their  friendship  but  don’t  know  how

dealer  -  someone  she  buys  drugs  from,  they  could  be  friends  or  it’s  strictly  business

bad  influence  -  someone  indie  is  a  bad  influence  on.  she  maybe  influences  them  to  party,  drink  or  do  drugs,  or  do  stupid  reckless  things  with  her

good  influence  -  someone  that  is  a  good  influence  on  her  and  gets  her  to  keep  her  act  together.  she  has  trouble  caring  about  anything  that  isn’t  music  related,  so  this  person  can  keep  her  on  track

roommates  -  one  to  two  people  that  she  lives  with  !!!  they  can  get  along,  or  maybe  they  don’t  vibe  super  well.  but  if  they  do  get  along  they  can  do  cute  stuff like  bake  and  watch  movies  together

coworkers  -  indie  is  a  bartender,  so  she  can  work  at  the  bar  or  restaurant  that  your  muse  works  at

meet  me  at  the  bar  -  someone  who  frequents  her  job  a  lot.  maybe  they’re  her  favorite  customer  and  she  loves  whenever  they  come.  we  can  plot  this  out  however !!!

congratulations  !!!  you  have  finally  reached  the  end  of  my  unnecessarily  long  intro  aksdjhsdjhk  i  would  like  to  thank  u  for  reading  and  apologize  for  all  the  rambling  i  did  <3  anyway  i  would  luv  to  plot,  so  i’ll  send  message  u  asap  if  u  like  this  post   !!!  we  can  definitely  plot  over  im’s,  but  i  am  partial  to  discord  if  u  wanna  add  me  there:    missing blackpink hours#5522

[quirrrky]

I don't understand why you make osamu found his love first instead of the reader. I know he deserves to be happy but isn't he's the one who causes this, right? No one was hurt him, his feelings is. She's the one who's hurt and he's the one who hurts her and feel guilty. And the fact that he decided to move on from eri just after he broke up with her, it's like he just date the reader just to hurt her! What's his real feeling when he decided to ask her out for the first time? And to know he can love someone new wholeheartedly meanwhile when he was with the reader, all she got is pain and wandering eyes is just too painful to imagine. Did he even loves the reader tho? Did he even has a hard time to move on from the reader?

Why don't you make from his pov that osamu is like atsumu, not with anyone after he broke up, sees her again after a long time with someone who really loves her and treat her better, something that he regretfully couldn't do and he eventually can fully move on now, knowing that she's happy and loved even not with him.

I'm sorry if i offended you, i just couldn't understand.

this is a great question! it's okay, I'm not offended I'm actually intrigued to see other POVs abt this... tbh it's a good idea! 🤔🤔🤔

I understand it sucks when you saw him doing so well with someone else while he was kinda shitty when with you. YN for me feels like a right person wrong time situation and again what's for you will never pass you by...YN's simply not the one for Samu :<

tbh I had Samu ended up with another earlier than Y/N to show that hapiness doesn't rly come from being romantic all the time. if you would remember, in ch4 Y/N left her dreams for Hyogo and she was rly disrailed from her plans and aspirations and Samu sort of became her escape from the fact that she doesn't know what's next for her. The Eri incident woke her up that she and Samu had issues he hasnt fixed and YN realized too that she had issues of her own. Ultimately leading her to put herself first and go back to Tokyo to fulfill her dreams. And this chapter showed that in her pursuit of her dreams, she managed to move on that she didn't even realize she already did because she was busy thriving 💆‍♀️ ( same as Atsumu) The line where she knows she's strong enough for wherever the journey would lead her portrays the inner strength and confidence she gained after and despite everything. I also liked to show that she totally moved on from Samu as she was happy that he allowed himself to love again.

Also, as for Samu...he really did love YN, but he hasn't healed himself yet from past wounds. YN knew this sort of and in ch2 and 4 tbh I forgot but 4 is sure....he's really trying. And he rly struggles forgetting about Eri as he still had unsettled business with her. OH THISSS FOUND IT!

He really wanted to to be with you, but Samu learned in a hard way that one couldn't just switch their feelings off no matter what they do.

He has baggage that hinders him from loving YN wholly. He self sabotaged their good start. I had him have the romance arc to show that he finally learned how to move on, let go of the past, and love fully, something he failed to do with YN. To show that he has developed as a person too and that's bc he learned his lessons. (This had to be with a new person because if I'd be in YN's shoes I wont want to be with Samu anymore ngl :< )

As for Samu breaking up with YN then lets go of Eri, I made it a point to be in that order actually. The reason why is 1. Samu had an epiphany that he can't be with YN when he can't be his 100% w/ her and he'll just end up hurting her. 2. Samu rejected Eri (even when Tsumu broke up with her) because he loves his brother more and he doesn't deserve her. She gave up on him too easily and accepted Atsumu likeee 🤷🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ it'd be dumb for Samu to choose her cuz yo girl still have her own issues...The best way for Samu is to start anew.

the decision making through all this is super hard but at the end of the day, I want to show how YN, Samu and even Tsumu has grown despite their own heartbreaks

that's it basicallyyy it's rly interesting to know your side of the storyyy... I rly vibe with it too tho, it's more bittersweet ig...it's beautiful too tbh 💗 it's a big awwwww for Samu my heart is rly breaking for him now in your scenario 🥺💗

[fktonofwhatnow]

ok hold on. acomaf is my fave book out of the whole series (it's mostly out of emotional value, i read it when i was younger and didn't have a real understanding out trauma and abuse only that i saw a character i loved getting out of a bad situation and getting happy) so obviously i didn't mind feysand being endgame and the development all of the characters had. i can accept tamlin turned out like that is realistic due to his trauma, i can accept feyre had to flee because it wasn't right for her, but the thing is after acofs i see no point to feyre leaving tamlin when rhysand ends up doing everything they told us tamlin was evil and unredeemable for. hiding the risks of her pregnancy, putting on shields on her, having feyre need to compromise over it. i honestly felt so betrayed by that. i'm not saying feyre and tamlin were good for each other, but it doesn't feel worth it to dismiss the potential they had for what we got with feysand.

also, sarah learn to treat "ugly" trauma with respect challenge. no they don't need to learn to physically fight to fight it. no they don't need a love interest to overcome it. yes the behaviors acquired from trauma and abuse aren't pretty but that doesn't mean a person is undeserving of kindness and compassion.

i think i had a point somewhere but i can't get to it. so hope you don't mind my rambling. anyway i loved your meta about tamlin i think he deserves better too

HOLY SHIT THIS ONE IS SO GOOD OK IM SO EXCITED

Bro you are so fine, I'm the one who doesn't make any sense and I totally get what you're trying to say. (Acomaf was actually my favorite book in the series too ngl)

BUT FUCK YEAH LETS TALK ABOUT RHYSAND.

I don't think it's a secret that Rhysand is one of my least favorite characters in media, probably ever? (How do I even put this into words) He is a bad character and to me, laughably so. You know how if you've ever written a character, there's that little phase that's like "what if people don't like this character' and then you're sad for a little bit? That's how Rhysand feels to me. He feels like SJM looked at this character and thought "I can't stand the thought of people not liking this character because I love him so much" and then did everything in her power to make sure we know how great he is.

Idk if this is just me screaming into the void, but I get to this place with my characters where like, especially if they are a little more morally gray or their decisions have negative impacts, I understand that I don't need the audience to like my main character. they can stand on their own, they can own up to what they do and they can grow from it. Thats what a good character does. That's how you keep your audience rooting for them. You gotta knock them over sometimes.

SJm doesn't knock Rhysand over. She doesn't push him to make mistakes, apologize, own up and move on. Rhysand has never made a decision that ended poorly for him. Everything goes the way he wants it to, because SJm wants us to know how cool and great he is. People who are cool and great don't make bad decisions! SJm doesn't let Rhysand fail, and she doesn't let him suffer his own decisions. Everyone else suffers his decisions, not him.

Rhysand's reputation as a good person hinges entirely on the audience liking him and/or thinking he's hot. And then what happens when the audience thinks neither of those things? Ya get a rly long post like this by a lil enby who is mad all the time. Rhysand loses all credibility when you look at him through a critical lens. Not a single thing the man does makes any goddamn sense. Here I thought acosf would give us a different perspective on Feysand and I was desperately hoping that Nesta would tell us what she really sees in them and how people around them really feel, I hoped that SjM would throw us for a loop and tell us that hey, she does know that Feysand are fucking toxic as hell and ruin the lives of people around them and she wants to show us that from an outside perspective but noooOoOOOoOoOOOO...

Instead we get Nesta hating herself because Rhysand told her that she shouldn't tell Feyre that Feyre could uh die in childbirth. Hey what the fuck.

Now I don't actually ship feylin, I kinda always sorta knew, even without spoilers, that it wasn't going to work out. Tamlin isn't sjm's idea of a good partner because he's not charming and witty and dark and handsome ya know? We met Rhysand and I knew that I was going to fucking hate this romance. Which sucks because I found Rhysand so intriguing in the first book. Ngl all the time spent in the spring court was kinda boring and every time Rhysand showed up to throw dead faeries at Tamlin I was like "oooooo" and I wanted to know more about why Tamlin, this awkward, blunt and kinda shy dude had beef with this super duper sly and shady man from another court.

I don't know if I've ever said this before, but SJm doesn't let her love interests grow. Rhysand doesn't change over the course of the story because he was already a good guy and his motives were for Feyre's sake I swear, the same goes for Rowan in TOG. SJm doesn't give Rhysand room to change. She needs to get to the part where they fuck make sure everyone knows that Rhysand is a good guy and actually he was good all along so that we like him more than Tamlin. It backtracks on everything bad Rhysand has ever done because you know... He had a good reason! It's fine!

I know it's probably just because SJm doesn't actually know how to write a good character growth arc but... Like can you imagine if Rhysand stayed the bad guy? Or at least remained the bad guy through acotar and acomaf? And then when Rhysand comes to take Feyre for his bargain it really was only to spite Tamlin? What about Rhysand, taking Feyre to the night court with him once a week every month for a long time, if only to see Tamlin's eyes grow darker and emptier every time he goes, and then he really starts to fall in love with Feyre. He's been a monster all this time, angry and cold and cruel and then he actually starts to fall in love. And then to get Feyre to stay he really does try to change, he stops antagonizing Feyre, he stops throwing dead faeries at Tamlin, and he stops harassing the Spring court. He starts spending genuine quality time with Feyre, he starts to learn about her and all the things she likes and he stops trying to get her to come with him just so Tamlin will be mad. He starts asking her to come with him because he wants to be around her and he prays that someday she'll want to be around him too. What if SJm let him grow.

But nahhhhhh instead we have a character who always knows the right answer to things, and he always knows how to fix every issue, and he is always so innovative and outside the box except that he isn't. We get a character who does the same shit as Tamlin but it's ok because he had a good reason not to tell Feyre that she could very well die in childbirth. Uhhhh don't know what that is but uhhh I know he has his reasons because all he has are his reasons.

It would be so easy to hold a mirror up to Rhysand and say "look at this. Look who you are. Do you not look just like Tamlin right now?"

But nooooooooOoOOOo Rhysand doesn't get to be wrong. Rhysand doesn't get to look like Tamlin because Tamlin is evil and Rhysand is definitely NOT I SWEAR.

But yeah I think the point I'm trying to make is that Sarah thinks so highly of Rhysand that he could never do wrong. He could never be like Tamlin, despite the narrative literally telling us the exact opposite.

Like you said, we lost the potential of what feylin could have been if SJm didn't suddenly decide that her audience needs to love Rhysand as much as she does. I think feylin could have been slow and sweet and a story of true healing and learning about one another. I think it would have been kind and steady and lots of "are you ok"s and "I'm sorry"s and "talk to me"s. Everything about Feysand feels rushed and hard and fast and the rest of the world doesn't have time to catch up. It's fucking exhausting to read it ya know what I'm saying.

(also can we talk about Rhysand like dying and Feyre finding the suriel and learning he's her mate and then instead of being like "k let's put a pin in that and fuckin save his life first" she like throws him around and everyone is like "wtf woman" and she's like I neeD tO Be alOnE these people have no idea how to prioritize)

Truly, I think it's innocent to a degree. There is absolutely no harm in wanting people to like your character. The harm comes when you destroy another character with no reason or explanation other than you want people to like a different character. Villain arc? Completely out of left field. You gotta build to that shit or like... Make it so that when you look back you slap your forehead and yell at a wall "OF FUCKING COURSE I SHOULD HAVE SEEN IT"

anyways, SJm treat "ugly" trauma with respect challenge SECONDED.

WELL IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK ME WEEKS YO WRITE IM HAVING A HARD TIME I know it probably doesn't make any sense I can't find my braincells BUT thanks for the ask @xelly

Tell me all your acotar things I love yo hear them !!

[thedyingmoon]

💙 Chat Buddies ( ?! ) 💙

***

Day 2

***

Vergil: (Y/N).

- SSSexy(Y/N) joined the conversation. -

You: Hi Verg

Y: Hru?

V: Hru?

Y: A sorry. How are you?

V: I'm fine. I guess.

Y: Hmm

V: (Y/N)?

Y: Yeah?

V: Have I?

Y: Have you what?

V: About yesterday. Have I offended you?

Y: Omg y would u say that?

V: ...

Y: I mean no! Ofc not!

V: Ofc?

Y: A sorry! I mean, of course not

V: I see.

Y: And ah

Y: Take it easy on Dante will u? U know how he is

Y: He's just playing around

Y: Dont take him too srsly

Y: I mean! Seriously. Thats it

V: Well, about that.

V: It is too late.

Y: Hmm?

V: Mind not what I said.

Y: Ahh, sure?

Y: 👌

~ A few minutes later ~

V: (Y/N)?

Y: Yeah?

V: About what I told you yesterday.

Y: It's ok Verg

Y: Dont think too much bout it

V: What I'm trying to say is,

Y: Hmm?

V: About you flirting with me.

V: Do you really not intend on doing exactly that?

Y: O.O

Y: >\\\<

Y: XD

V: (Y/N)?

Y: Oh dont mind me

Y: No

Y: I dont intend on flirting w/ u 👌

V: And,

Y: Yes and?

V: About "shag".

Y: Oh ur still worried bout that?!

Y: Dont u worry Verg. U r safe from being shagged.

Y: Besides

Y: If I rly wanna shag anyone, it would be someone that I rly like.

Y: Like

Y: Rly rly like. U know what I'm saying

Y: So, yeah! U r safe Verg

Y: ���

Y: Verg?

Y: Hey

Y: Vergil?

V: I' am here.

V: I see.

V: I shall bother you no more.

Y: o

Y: kay?

V: I bid you a good day.

~ Later that night ~

Patty: (Y/N)!

Y: Hey Patty! Long time no chat!

P: Its me

P: Dante

Y: W - ?!!!!!

Y: Y do u have Patty's phone?! Oh!

Y: Ur wifi connection got cut off again!

Dante: (Y/N)...

Y: Kay, sorry

Y: So, what's up?

D: Did u and Verg fight?

Y: W - ?

Y: No!

Y: We're cool actually

Y: You?

D: Still healing

D: Yamato wounds

Y: Did I read that right?!

Y: VERGIL STABBED U!

D: Happens loads of times

Y: U deserve it this time

D: Well

D: Yeah

D: Anyway! Talk to him! Use sweet words! Whatever!

Y: Whwhwhwhwait!

Y: What is wrong w/ u?!!!!

Y: What happened?!!!!!

D: Idk! What happened to you two?!!!

D: Verg seem off the whole day! Like,

D: He can't focus on the mission at all!

D: And when I said ur name he kinda just

Y: What?

D: Nvm!

D: Talk to him!

Y: Kay kay! I'll talk to him!

Y: Tomorrow! Im so damn sleepy!

D: Oh right! Timezones

D: How's Paris life?

Y: Good

D: Hey promise me you'll talk to him

Y: OKAY OKAY

Y: I promise

D: Alright

D: Adios

Y: Bonne nuit Dante

***

💙💙💙

***

[20cm]

honestly,,, happy to hear i'm not the only one that teared up a little when watching aotm behind, like i don't even know how it happened but it did 😣 but omg tyun is legit coming for u like i bet my left kidney with this comeback he's gonna upgrade to an ult and i wanna witness it all <3 but do not worry,, i'm going through it too HDVDHD

his curls were everything like if u know me u know my head goes blank whenever i see curls like these and seeing him with short hair & no curls made my heart break 💔😭 i'm gonna make a praying circle for the hairstyle to come back 🙏🏻

new's hair is like this,,, teal ? colour and i absolutely love it; i think i haven't seen that shade before in kpop ;; i genuinely wanna make an appointment too even though i already told myself i'll dye my hair a different colour for the new year again (/ _ ; ) STOP THE TEMPTATIONS HDVDHDBH but i say go for it, rook, dye your hair a fun summery colour <3

same, i haven't been this excited for a comeback in a while but i think it's bc with all those dark & sensual & mature concepts they've been doing recently, i needed sth like bloom bloom and ddd <333 how did u like the announcement vid tho, let's talk abt it bc i love it and cannot shut up abt how cute changmin is but anyways- i hope you're doing well too MWAH ⊂( ◜◒◝ )⊃

hiii angie im sorry 4 the late response 😭<///3 i rly got sucked into a project + then a vacation but im here now 😤

really its just . SUCH an emotional experience like esp when you take into account what he said about it on vlive + how nervous he was before the aotm dropped he was so self-conscious and worried it Hurt :( he went thru so much to film that thing in 2 weeks and he did so well 🥺 its hard Not to cry i think 😭😭😭😭😭

and i think you of a week ago was right 💀💀💀.... hes kinda already in ult territory i think and gyu is climbing into a regular bias its insane .... i think the next week + during the promotions of fight or escape are gonna truly end me

NOOO i get that his curls were SUCH a look too 🥺🥺🥺they fit him so so so well like. i hope they come back for u its what we deserve i think 🙏

YES i saw new he looks so good ... its really a new (haha) color and i agree they make me want to dye my hair..... i kind of already did this weekend w/ a dark blueblack but i miss really bright and fun colors !! thank u for ur support 😤😤❤️❤️❤️❤️i think you should dye yours too if you want !!! nothing to lose i think <3

ik the annc vid is LONG old now and we HAVE the music!!!!!!! and the mv! how do you like thrill ride? and the album + mv?

the mv is SOOO fun i love the resort + neon + sunwoos hair in it has some return to the curls.. and the freckles on q<3 i think my fave songs from the album are the title track + dance til we drop but i love all the songs !!! (and ofc im obsessed w/ everything that juyeon has going on in it 💀❤️❤️)

speaking of new stuff coming <3 how are you liking the fight or escape concepts ? + the new song previews? sorry im asking ksf a lot u can pick and choose<33

i hope ur weeks been well and ur doing okay?? 💖 and tht ur enjoying vacation(?) mwah!! ^_^ 💛