#this isn't the smut i promised and for that i apologize lol

[valeriianz]

Dreamling Week June 7: 'Fake Dating' | human au

This was a mistake.

Dream sits outside the fitting room, back against a mirror as he waits for Hob to come out and show him his next choice. They were going to a wedding together, which in itself was fine, but the context behind it…

Dream should have said no. Should have scathingly told Hob to grow a pair and just deal with his family’s judgment. It wasn’t a bad thing to be single, but apparently in Hob’s family, being single at 35 years old, and for the past nine years, was a problem. 

Dream had often wondered how Hob had remained single for such a long time, he knew his friend was a catch. Charismatic, wicked smart, and roguishly handsome to boot. Dream couldn’t deny how he’d often catch himself staring at Hob, looking twice at him when they went out with friends, his smile wide and posture loose from a couple drinks. Or while Dream would help him build lesson plans, peeking sideways as Hob’s glasses began to slip down his nose and his hair would fall in his face. 

Or while he was trying on suits for his cousin’s wedding. Where they would be attending as a couple.

“Hob…” Dream had given him a flat look, controlling his features into something unreadable while his heart threatened to burst from his chest. “This is absurd. Could we not attend as we are– as friends?”

“That’s the easiest part!” Hob’s eyes were wide and imploring. “We’re already friends! They won’t even question it.”

And then he’d gone on a tirade that Dream was quite familiar with, having been Hob’s friend for so long, about how his family had moved on from being subtle to outright dogging Hob about his love life. Why hadn’t he settled down yet? Who was going to continue the Gadling name, if not their only son? At your age… With your talents and charms… Such a waste… on and on and Hob, understandably, was sick of it.

Any further complaints had died on Dream’s tongue. He should have tried harder to convince Hob that this was a stupid idea. That his family’s opinion didn’t matter. That Hob should keep living as he had been in spite of it all. Because honestly, in what universe could this possibly work? How does this not end with Dream vulnerable and weak and wanting?

Because Dream was head over heels obsessed with Hob. No, he wouldn’t say the L word. It wasn’t like that. He knew better than to fall into that trap again. It was easier, somehow, to be a little more deranged about it. A little unhinged… delusional.

Especially as he watched Hob walk out of the little changing room for the third time now, eyes stuck on the jacket around Hob’s shoulders, broad and strong, accentuating the lines of his arms and back, cinched slightly at the waist. His thoughts tripping and staggering as Hob’s long legs move to a full length mirror across from Dream, unashamedly staring at Hob’s thighs, firm and thick, and up to his ass, which the dark blue slacks hugged so well. 

Hob is pulling on the collar, turning this way and that, oblivious to the war raging inside of Dream.

“I don’t know about this one…” Hob is murmuring, tugging now on end of the sleeves. “Not sure if blue is my color.”

Blue is absolutely Hob’s color. Dream wants to say how fetching it looks against Hob’s golden brown skin, how it makes him look regal yet soft. How great it would look on the floor of the hotel room they would be staying at– oh fuck, Dream had forgotten about that. They’d be sharing a room.

Dream stood just as Hob kicked a leg out, looking down.

“And the pants are too long.”

“We can get that hemmed,” Dream kept his face impassive as he stepped up behind Hob, briefly meeting his eyes in the mirror before looking at the jacket.

He brushed his hands across Hobs shoulders, dusting off invisible lint, then down his back, straightening out invisible wrinkles. Before looking up again at the floor length mirror across from them.

They are nearly of height, Dream has maybe half an inch on Hob and can see how he stands behind Hob in the reflection. Can see how Hob has stilled and his eyes locked onto his. How he is staring back at Hob, his pupils shaking slightly, like he’s staring at something delicious. Dream swallows, letting his imagination wander.

He thinks about pressing up against Hob’s back, so his groin would slip comfortably against that perfectly round ass, how it might feel to get his hands on Hob’s waist, pulling so he could feel the way Hob’s shoulders fit atop Dream’s chest.

How Dream’s hands would slip around to Hob’s front, getting his fingers inside the fitted jacket and pressing them incessantly– intentionally, along the soft cotton of the white button down, how Hob’s skin might feel against it. How Dream’s hands would trail up to his chest, undoing those buttons as he went, revealing the thick dark hairs there and getting briefly distracted enough to comb his fingers through that mane, tilting his head to growl in Hob’s ear as he tightened his fingers and pulled just to hear what noise Hob would make in return. 

And while Dream’s lips were at Hob’s ear, he’d trail them down to his neck, biting into the unmarked flesh, tasting the salt and aftershave with his tongue, peppering kisses even lower as he pulled the fabric of the shirt and jacket off his shoulders completely and imagining the eager, wanton grown that would tumble from Hob’s lips as he tilted his head back, getting his own hand around the back of Dream’s head to pull him in for a sloppy kiss–

Dream blinked and found himself still standing behind Hob, who was fully dressed and looking back at him and– was he breathing heavy?

The daydream only lasted a second, just a flash of a fantasy Dream indulged in, but now he wonders if he’d been too obvious. He’s staring back at Hob, pupils dilated and lips parted slightly, like a panting dog about to pounce.

Dream clears his throat and looks down the length of the mirror, accidentally settling them on the seat of Hob’s pants and distractedly averting his gaze again to Hob’s back, the dark blue fabric before him.

“You look good, Hob.” Dream manages to force the words out, his voice lower than usual, hungry. “I think this is the one.”

“Yeah.” Why does Hob sound breathless? “Yeah I like this one.”

Dream nods and forces every cell in his body to step back, away from Hob and allow him to turn back to the fitting room. He keeps his gaze down, waiting until Hob is conveniently out of sight before he allows the heat he can feel crawling up his neck to make its way to his face.

[for @watercubebee and our shared obsession with seeing Hob in nice clothes and wanting Dream to tear them off of him *handshake*]

[melancholy-of-nadia]

love u lately (m) #1 | myg/knj/pjm

title: love u lately​ chapter title: #1 - lavender haze​ pairing: yoongi x f. reader, namjoon x f. reader, jimin x f. reader (yoonminjoon x f. reader) rating/genre: m (18+) ; smut ; college/university au , pseudo frat! bts; best friends! yoonminjoon friends to lovers; summary: In the midst of your college journey, life takes an unexpected turn when you find yourself moving into a "pseudo frat" house with your childhood best friends Namjoon, Yoongi, and Jimin. The college experience you envisioned seems promising, but as Namjoon and Jimin get caught up in flings, their focus shifts away from you, Yoongi, and everyone else in the house. The strong bond you once shared starts to feel strained, leaving you to question your feelings and changing dynamics. Though, the haze of a single night at a party sets off a chain reaction of emotions that leaves you grappling with a question you never thought you'd ask—could you be in love with all three of them? warnings: pwp, swearing, making out, subtle body worship, penetration, cunnilingus, CONSENSUAL!! sex, nipple play, breast play, overstimulation, mutual orgasm, touch of aftercare, frustration bc guys are dumb sometimes note: thank u to @daegudrama (as always) for beta reading and editing my fics. much appreiciated. this is the first fic series i have written in 10 years (i used to be in the anime/pokemon fandoms lol) so i apologized if it isn't that great, but i will keep improving! note 2: this is also for the yoonminjoon stans !! such an underrated subunit! total word count: 8.3k drop date: august 29th, 2023, 1:00pm pst cross posted on AO3 here | Series Masterlist | #2 →

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October 4 (Thursday)

The morning sun streams through the blinds, gently coaxing you awake. You catch the aroma of sizzling bacon wafting from the kitchen as you continue to fight the urge to sleep in longer.

With a quick stride, you open your door to find your close friends, Yoongi and Jimin, seated at the dining table, enjoying breakfast. Their subtle waves are met with your ecstatic waving. You glance at Namjoon standing near the stove wearing a tank top and basketball shorts. He tends to the bacon in the pan as it sizzles and pops. 

"Joon, could you set aside two pieces for me?" you call out, causing him to jolt as he hadn't noticed your presence in the room due to him being in zen focus trying not to burn everyone’s breakfast.

He sighs, shoulders slumping. "You better hurry and brush your teeth, or I might let Jungkook have the rest once he's out of the shower in a few minutes."

Nodding, you hurry to the second bathroom in your home to prepare for the day, aiming to grab some fresh homemade breakfast before your noon class.

This spacious house has been your shared sanctuary with your childhood best friends – Kim Namjoon, Min Yoongi, and Park Jimin – since the start of your second year of college in September. Last year, some older guy friends from your hometown who went to the same college as you lived at the house originally. Then over the summer, your best friends moved in with them to take summer courses and on-campus internships. You got added to the mix when you were desperately trying to find housing as the university waitlisted you in favor of the 29,000 new freshmen they admitted to the campus who they prioritized housing for. After looking at expensive off-campus apartments and sketchy leases, the boys couldn’t bear seeing you struggle and potentially homeless, so they let you live with them in their 4 bedroom home. Your housemate Seokjin gave up his single room, with a bit of hesitation, so you could live comfortably. The rest of the boys share rooms with each other. 

With eight people living together, the house unofficially earns the nickname "Beta Tau Sigma," or the “pseudo frat”, as some people around campus called it. While not officially recognized as a fraternity due to various complicated reasons, the BTS house still became known for its "poppin’ house parties” hosted by your lovely housemate Jung Hoseok last year. 

Your friendship with Namjoon, Yoongi, and Jimin goes back to a little over a decade ago. Namjoon became your next door neighbor as a kid, eventually he introduced you to Yoongi who was a family friend of his, and finally, you all befriended Jimin when he transferred to your middle school. You all remained close during high school. Namjoon and Yoongi, being a year older than you and Jimin, graduated and went to college. Eventually you and Jimin graduated, and the two of you got into the same college a few hours away from your hometown as them and attended together. 

However, moving in with a bunch of men was something you prefer that people didn’t know about you. You wanted to avoid any rumors being created, especially considering the guys living with you are popular among the girls at your campus. If there is something that you don’t miss from high school, it is the petty drama and baseless rumors people make to tear others down. For now, people assume you are living in the dorms with your only female friend: Hwasa. You always think that it’s for the best things are this way. You decide not to think too much beyond that, despite the probability that a few people are catching on to the fact that you probably do live with these guys platonically.

After washing up, you enter the kitchen again, taking a seat next to Yoongi who is engrossed in his Twitter feed. He finally acknowledges your presence.

"Took you long enough, huh? Don't you have Stats at 10?" He quips.

You scrunch your eyebrows at him. “Good morning to you too, Yoongs?” You retort playfully. “No stats today. It’s Thursday so I have Finance at noon!"” You exclaim loudly to the room. 

Groans resonate through the kitchen. Yoongi's teasing backfires, much to his chagrin. Taehyung descends from upstairs, puzzled by the commotion in the room.

“What’s wrong with her finance class?” He asks innocently. 

"There’s nothing wrong with the class, but it's the classmate in that class!" Namjoon sighs, leaning on the counter after placing your bacon and avocado toast plate on the table.

"Lim Jaebeom," Jimin snickers, promptly earning a discreet kick from you under the table. "Ow! Hey! No need to resort to violence! Hey! I’m only speaking facts!” He winces as he holds his knee up and rubs the pain away.

Lim Jaebeom, also known by everyone as JB, is the cute guy you met in your Macroeconomics class last year. He is popular as a member of a real fraternity, Gamma Omega Tau and the professional frat, Kappa Psi Pi (or JYP, as some called it?). Part of both fraternities, he radiates talent as a business major and an underground SoundCloud artist on the side. While your interactions remain class-related, he greets you often outside of class even after the course finished, much to your best friends’ annoyance.

Over spring semester of last year and the initial weeks of the current fall semester, you’ve developed a small crush on Jaebeom. Though when it comes to your love life, it’s been a few years since you’ve had some kind of thing going on. There’s only been two people so far: Wonwoo, captain of the Men’s varsity volleyball team who you slept with once when you boldly asked him if he would take your v-card. You and your best friends were going through an experimental era during your junior year of high school. They teased you a lot about being “innocent” but were left speechless when you told them what you’ve done. They said that was the end of the experimental era. Later on you also found out he’s your housemate Jungkook’s cousin. 

The second guy is Yeonjun. You don’t like to talk about him much, but he was in the same year and you guys talked often (much to Namjoon’s dismay). He was your fake date at your housemate Seokjin's brother's wedding the summer after you graduated high school. One thing led to another and you were sneaky links for a while. It didn’t end well though.

"She's got eyes for JB, but is too scared to make a move," Jimin teases, earning him another kick under the table to which he dodges.

"In case you forgot, it took you a month to see Irene Bae wanted you so badly," Taehyung rolls his eyes while a hint of a smile tugs your lips as you struggle to suppress your laughter seeing him call out Jimin.

The Jimin and Irene power couple relationship goes back to spring semester last year. Taehyung needed Jimin to go on a double date with him to the Psi Gamma Epsilon Formal, which is the co-ed fraternity that Taehyung’s girlfriend Jennie is in. While you have many mixed opinions about Taehyung’s tastes when it comes to women, you hate that he influenced some of those tastes on Jimin. Thus, Jennie introduced Jimin to her friend, Irene (the Sigma Mu Epsilon Campus President) and the rest is history. 

Though, you weren't aware that they were dating until a month ago when they had already been dating for three months. You are not sure how they managed to hide it from people for a while.

“Ya!! How was I supposed to know that getting asked to eat ramen together on a Friday night meant anything BUT eating ramen.” Jimin sighs as he gets up from his chair. “Maybe you should ask Jaebeom out for some ramen.” He playfully suggests, emphasizing Jaebeom's name, sending your face into a blush.

"I'm not interested in sleeping with him!" you protest, cheeks burning. In Korean slang, sharing ramen implies spending the night together. You’d rather romantically share ramen like the spaghetti eating scene in “Lady & the Tramp” than fuck him and ruin your friendship.

“Isn’t that what he’s known for? Sleeping with girls, taking sex polaroids, and plastering them on his frat bedroom wall? Taehyung butts in, since he too, knows of Jaebeom’s lifestyle like everyone else on this campus does. You, of course, are aware of it too, which is why you haven’t bothered to try your chance with him. 

“Exactly why I’m okay being the nice friend saying hi from across campus when he says hi instead of becoming a faceless polaroid in his room of him giving me backshots.” You cross your arms as you roll your eyes at him.

“Please don’t give me mental images of that.” Yoongi finally speaks up, groaning at your words again. You playfully elbow his side at your remark. He covers his face immediately as he feels himself blushing at these thoughts.

“Well, when you decide to get the balls to do something, I shall be here to give you advice. Just let me know.” Jimin says as he grabs his bag from the couch and heads to class with Taehyung, leaving you with Namjoon and Yoongi. 

“Wow, can you believe him? He thinks he can talk big now that he’s dating little Miss Sigma Mu Epsilon’s President Irene.” You let out an annoyed sigh as you take a bite out of the avocado toast Namjoon gave you.

At first you were excited for one of your guy best friends to be in a relationship again after years, but that excitement was short-lived as you noticed Jimins’ absence in the house became more evident. He would either be at his dance club, studying in the library, or spending the rest of his freetime with Irene. Maybe doing all of the above with her. 

When you and your best friends were in relationships or flings in the past, they promised that they would never leave or ignore the group to prioritize those other people first.  And they were always true to their word.

But as of lately, not anymore. While you once were used to having Jimin at home or at the dorm common area with the guys for Friday Night Game Night, this sight was slowly becoming a memory. It’s hard to admit how these subtle changes of seeing Jimin prefer to do other activities saddens you. You eventually decided to bottle up your feelings of sadness, not wanting them to see, and focus on other things filling up your plate.

Namjoon wasn’t paying attention to what you said as he uncontrollably smiles at his phone with a Kakao talk chat with someone pulled up, making your eyes narrow at him. 

“O-Oh, sorry. I was texting Jihyo.” he admits blatantly, before widening his eyes at what he just said. “What did you say?” Namoon glances at you briefly.

“Park Jihyo? Your group project partner slash sex–?” Yoongi narrows his gaze at Namjoon, before he quickly launches to cover Yoongi’s mouth. 

What? Is this seriously another sudden revelation incoming this early in the morning? You didn’t think you’d spiral into a pool of further questioning the future of your friendship with your guy best friends. Especially when it comes to Namjoon dating the campus’ kindest angel, Jihyo. Compared to Irene, you don’t have anything snarky to say about Jihyo. You admit she is better in hundreds of different ways than you. You wonder if your friends’ recent dating or fling escapades are a sign of a bigger issue in your friendship with them. You wonder if Yoongi’s also hiding someone away from your sight.

"So you’re also seeing someone?" Your pout is playful, but a hint of disappointment peeks through. "Don't tell me you're bailing on Friday Night Game Nights just like Jimin…"

Namjoon's response carries a weight of hesitation as he takes a thoughtful pause, considering his next words carefully. "Well, kind of…" His words hang in the air for a moment, a sense of complexity in his tone. "It's complicated... and no, I won't be skipping Friday Night Game Night every time like Jimin... except for this week."

The curiosity in your expression is mirrored by Yoongi's raised eyebrow. “What’s the excuse that you so kindly will be telling Yoongi and I?” you ask, the intrigue evident in your voice.

“Well actually, I may need to borrow the house so I was wondering if you guys could have Friday Night Game Night somewhere else.”

“Why should we go somewhere--” As you begin to protest, an epiphany interrupts your words, causing them to taper off. A realization dawns, connecting the dots between Yoongi's earlier comments and the direction this conversation is taking. “Wait what!? KIM NAMJOON YOU-!” 

“You’re seriously going to sexile everyone in this house?” Yoongi's words burst forth interrupting yours, his laced with a mixture of genuine surprise and a hint of humor. His widened eyes are concealed behind a hand that covers his mouth, almost as if he's trying to stifle his amusement at the sudden request.

Namjoon lets out a chuckle, his expression playful as he confirms, "Potentially! But I'm not sure yet. I might go back to her place, but I wanted to keep my options open so we could..."

Your voice cuts in before Namjoon can elaborate further, a mix of jest and sincerity in your tone, "Okay, okay, okay, I get it! We'll move game night somewhere else then!" The words rush out of you as you shield yourself from whatever details might follow that your ears weren't prepared for. You shoot Yoongi a look, seeking affirmation. "We’ll figure it out..right, Yoongi?"

Yoongi doesn't miss a beat as he follows up with a response laced with dry humor, “Right. I really don’t want to hear my best friend fucking while I’m trying to relax at the end of a stressful week.”

A blush creeps onto your cheeks, and you playfully reprimand Yoongi, your palm meeting your face in an exaggerated facepalm, "Yoongi, please spare us from any more visual details." Your laughter mingles with a hint of embarrassment, but you quickly regain your composure. "But thank you for letting us know, Namjoon..."

Namjoon's easy smile returns, and he jests, "Have fun without me, though. I know Jin and Jungkook will keep things lively without me or even Jimin there."

Even without any truly scandalous events transpiring, an air of awkwardness hangs over the conversation. The remainder of your breakfast passes in silence, each of you lost in your own thoughts. Eventually, you rise from the table, making your way back to your room to prepare for class, which looms just an hour away.

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By the time you come out of your room again, only Yoongi and Jungkook are in the living room doing last minute assignments. You assume Namjoon already left for class with Hoseok and also figure Seokjin left even before that. He’s the only person in this house taking 8am classes. 

This is the norm. On Thursdays, you walk with Yoongi to class, as his class is in the same building as yours. Sometimes, Jungkook joins you guys when he procrastinates the hour before class to finish assignments. 

“Are you ready to go? Jungkook’s done now.” Yoongi gets up from the couch already expecting your response to be yes. Jungkook looks up from his textbook to give you a thumbs up.

“Yep, all ready to go.”

The three of you step out onto campus, engaging in conversation that weaves between the events of the week and the anticipation of the impending game night. As you discuss plans, you consider the limited guests—Namjoon engaged with his "complicated" fuck buddy situation, Jimin on his weekend outings with Irene—leaving only you, Yoongi, Jungkook, Hoseok, Jin, and Taehyung for the upcoming Friday Night Game Night. At least you thought it was just the 6 of you.

Jungkook interjects, scratching his head apologetically. "Oh, by the way, I forgot to mention earlier, but Taehyung and I are going out bowling and drinking with the Woogas on Friday..." His voice trails off with a sheepish smile, his plea for forgiveness evident in his gesture. The Woogas were a group of grad students who were close to Taehyung.

Surveying the group left, you pose a question, preempting any plans that would end up getting canceled. "Anybody else have plans?"

Jungkook takes a bit to contemplate, his mutterings finally clarifying the situation. "I remember Jin hyung texting the gc that he has a Kappa Psi Pi chapter till 9:30 tomorrow—pledging's keeping him busy. He might go out with his frat brothers afterward for drinks. Hoseok is out of town tonight for a competitive dance tournament with the uni dance club."

A collective sigh of resignation hangs in the air as you and Yoongi register the inevitability—it's just the two of you for the upcoming Friday night. Your expressions communicate mutual understanding, as if exchanging an unspoken acknowledgment that it won't be just this one time moving forward.

You bid farewell to Jungkook as he heads off to his own class, then turn to Yoongi with a hopeful glint in your eyes, silently urging him to weave his magic and devise a plan to fill the void left by your absent friends.

"Maybe we could hit that popular bar downtown? What's it called...Arena?" Yoongi suggests, a hint of excitement lacing his words.

A shake of your head expresses your skepticism. "On a Friday night? I heard too many weirdos go at that time, Yoongs.” 

“Then, why don’t we go house party hopping? We haven’t done that since freshman year.” He smirks, as he adds the nostalgic suggestion.

The words "house party hopping" elicit a mix of memories, both good and not-so-good. It's a ritual familiar to college freshmen to excessively drink and dance at multiple parties in one night, but it gets too difficult to do through the rest of undergrad. You, however, have only done this activity of going to multiple different parties in one night, twice. 

The first time, things went smoothly when Yoongi, Namjoon, and Jimin went to five different house parties on the frat house row. The second time was not so smooth. Contrary to popular belief of Beta Tau Sigma, everyone at the house are light-weights when it comes to drinking, with Yoongi, Jungkook and Taehyung probably being the strongest drinkers of the bunch. That night of house party hopping ended with Namjoon and Jimin getting drunk and losing their student access cards at one of the five houses you went to. Because they couldn’t get into their dorm, you and Yoongi had to carry them back to your dorm and have them to stay at the dorm’s study lounge for the night. At some point, you all almost got caught by the dorm RA making their nightly rounds to make sure everything is good. Yoongi quickly excused all of you being cramped in the small room as “studying for an accounting midterm”, to which the RA didn’t question anything further after hearing the words “accounting” and left you alone for the rest of the night.

Based on that experience, you are reluctant to even try doing that again. However this time, it is just going to be you and Yoongi, the most mature ones in the overall friend group. Or at least you like to think so.

"Well, considering how the last time went..." Your voice trails off, your narrowed eyes revealing your internal debate. "I'll think about it more and let you know."

Yoongi nods at your response and you both say goodbye as you part ways to class.

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Entering your finance class, You secure a seat near the door and the front board, a vantage point that lets you observe the classroom's dynamics. Today, however, your routine is disrupted when someone unexpectedly occupies the seat next to you. 

As you set up your notebook, your gaze lifts, revealing Jaebeom sitting beside you. A faint flutter tugs at your heart, a pulse of anticipation racing through your veins. A steady stream of thoughts races through your mind, echoing, "This is definitely sus." You've consumed enough romance novels and coming-of-age stories to recognize when circumstances take a pointed turn. You've shared casual conversations and greetings with Jaebeom, but sitting next to each other is unprecedented—there's surely more to it.

A subtle "Ahem" draws your attention, and Jaebeom turns to face you, his eyes meeting yours. "Hey, Y/N… do you mind if I sit here today? I left my glasses behind, and I can't really see from my usual spot."

Your reassurance carries a softness as you reply, "Hi, Jaebeom! Of course, no problem." A smile graces your lips, and he returns it, dispelling the suspicions you had entertained. So you guess there’s no special reason for sitting next to you. 

The rest of class goes by smoothly, but you can’t help but to think that Jaebeom has something else to ask you about. The overthinking from your wild imagination is getting to you. As the class concludes, you hurriedly pack your belongings, eager to continue with your day. Yet, before you can make your exit, Jaebeom's voice halts you in your tracks.

"Hey! I've been meaning to ask," his words are loud, receiving attention from your peers, "Do you have any plans for tomorrow? The Gammas are hosting a party, and I was wondering if you'd be interested in coming."

Bingo. This is exactly what you’ve been waiting for. Not an invite to a party per se, BUT now you suddenly have something to do with Yoongi tomorrow night after being ditched by everyone else. 

“I’m down to go! I actually changed plans with a few friends so I don’t have anything to do tomorrow night.”

Jaebeom's response brings an even wider smile to your face. “Then I’ll see you there! You can bring a friend with you if you’d like.” And with that, you and Yoongi are definitely booked for tomorrow night.

With those words, your plans for tomorrow night are sealed. The newfound excitement has you beginning to wonder whether it’s actually alright to go considering Yoongi feels indifferent towards Jaebeom. You decide to call him about the plan on your way to the library for your daily fix of iced tea.

Dialing Yoongi's number, you initiate the conversation. "You and me, Gamma Omega Tau house party," you declare, your voice laced with anticipation.

His response holds a curious tone. "...So, I'll take that as a yes to house party hopping."

Chuckling, you clarify, maintaining your stance. "Well, we could do that if you're set on it," You explain, continuing your lowkey refusal to repeat that experience. “...but I actually got personally invited to the GOT party by Jaebeom.”

Yoongi's groan resonates through the line, conveying his reluctance but also a willingness to compromise. "If there's free booze and a chance to catch up with some other friends, then count me in."

“That’s perfect!” Excitement in your voice is clear to Yoongi as you both finalize plans for tomorrow night. Perhaps it’ll end up being a fun night for the both of you compared to what everyone else was doing instead. The upset feeling from all the sudden changes continues to linger in your chest, but you brush it away with the hopes of getting wasted on Friday.

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Friday comes by like a quick breeze. The day passes in a blur of classes, assignments, and hanging out with Yoongi and the rest of your friends. Evening comes around, and you find yourself getting ready for the Gamma Omega Tau party. You choose a cute yet comfortable outfit consisting of a revealing v-bar black tube top and ripped boyfriend jeans, hoping to strike a balance between looking good and feeling at ease. After a bit of makeup and fixing your hair, you are ready to head out.

You walk over to knock on Yoongi’s bedroom door. He opens the door revealing his outfit: a black tank top, acid-washed ripped jeans, and a black leather jacket to top it off. It definitely makes him exude his signature nonchalant charm. As he greets you with a nod, you can’t help but feel a flutter of excitement for the night ahead. You guys look so hot and would definitely make the other guys jealous of your totally awesome alternative Friday night plans if they were here.

The two of you make your way to the party a couple blocks away on frat row, the streets buzzing with energy as students get ready to party for the weekend. The Gamma Omega Tau house is alive with music, laughter, and the glow of colorful lights. You both enter the party, and immediately the atmosphere hits you—a mix of pulsating music, chatter, and the distinct scent of alcohol.

Yoongi heads to the makeshift bar in the kitchen to get drinks, while you decide to explore the party on your own. You bump into a couple of familiar faces from classes, exchanging greetings and catching up briefly. Some of these faces included Hwasa, your only dear female best friend who you haven’t seen much since moving out of your shared dorm freshman year. She is a little busy taking shots with who seems to be your old dorm floor neighbors Soyoon and Jieun. But overall, the night is young, and the anticipation of what it could bring is building up inside you.

A little while later, Yoongi returns with drinks in hand—something colorful and sweet for you, and something stronger for himself. You clink your cups together before taking a sip. The music is loud, and bodies are moving to the rhythm all around you. It was a sight to behold—the carefree spirit of college life on full display.

As the night progresses, you find yourself playing various party games, dancing a little with Hwasa, and meeting new people she introduces you to. Yoongi seems to be enjoying himself from a distance, laughing and chatting with a group of guys from his music class. He occasionally watches you from afar to make sure you don’t get lost or that something even worse doesn’t happen. Frat parties can be dangerous after all. It makes you feel a little happy that he does these little things and shows how much he cares about you. More than you thought before. However, there’s a sudden moment in the lively ambience when you start to feel a pang of loneliness. A sense of being adrift in a sea of unfamiliar faces.

Time seems to slip away as you’re lost in the lights, and before you know it, you are on your third drink. The alcohol is starting to take its effect, making you feel warm and a bit more uninhibited. Maybe this wasn’t the best choice. Maybe partying is not what you needed tonight to get your mind off of things. 

And these thoughts are only amplified with the next thing you see. In the corner of the crowded kitchen, you catch Namjoon and Jihyo making out, and your heart races. You suddenly excuse yourself from the group you are chatting with and head towards the front door, seeking some space to clear your head. 

However you stop yourself from bursting out of the open door. Instead, you lean against the wall, trying to steady your breathing. The noise and chaos of the party feel overwhelming now rather than numbing your thoughts from earlier. You clutch your cup as you look around, feeling like an outsider in your own surroundings. It’s in this moment of vulnerability that someone bumps into you, spilling their red jungle juice all over your clothes. You look down at your stained jeans emotionless.

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" the girl exclaims, looking genuinely apologetic as she hands you some napkins. Your vision is blurring and you can’t tell if you know her or not. Her voice sounds familiar though.

Though, you manage a weak nod letting her know it was fine. It is in that unfortunate moment that you see your crush, JB, appearing out of nowhere walking in your direction. In the several hours you’ve been here this is when he decides to show up?! Your heart continues to race faster as he approaches, his eyes locking onto yours. Not right now, you plead to the gods internally that he isn’t coming towards you. But he does.

"Hey, Y/N, are you okay?" JB asks, his concern evident in his voice as he looks you over.

You feel a lump forming in your throat, not wanting him to see you in this state of vulnerability. Your eyes well up, and you fight to hold back tears. This isn't how you want him to see you, at your lowest point, struggling to keep it together.

Just as you are about to break down, a strong hand gently takes hold of your left arm, pulling you away from JB. You are led into the dimly lit hallway, away from the noise of the party. Not many people looming in this area. The door to the bathroom opens as someone leaves, and the person guides you inside before locking the door behind you.

Your visions starts to focus fully again. And you see…

It’s Yoongi.

His presence is a lifeline you forgot that you needed moments before.

"Y-Yoongi!" The exclamation trembles in the air, a mixture of surprise, relief, and the weight of your unraveling emotions.

In the dimly lit bathroom, you finally let your guard down, the tears streaming down your cheeks. Yoongi is momentarily taken aback by the intensity of your reaction, but swiftly recovers. He extends a napkin from his pocket, offering it as a gesture of support. His features, though, oscillate between concern and puzzlement, his brows slightly furrowed.

"Hey, what's wrong?" he asks softly, his voice a comforting presence in the midst of your turmoil.

You take a shuddering breath, trying to gather your thoughts. The alcohol is making it hard to articulate your feelings, but you manage to explain how seeing Namjoon and Jihyo had triggered a sense of loneliness and panic within you. Jimin dating Irene in what seemed to be a serious relationship also has you spiraling. It all makes you question the stability of your friendships and fear that you are slowly losing the people who once meant the most to you. 

Yoongi listens intently, his gaze unwavering as he lets you pour out your feelings. When you are done, he leans against the sink, his expression thoughtful.

"I get it," he says, his voice soft but steady. "Change is hard, and sometimes it feels like everything is slipping away. But you know, life just keeps moving forward, and people change, I guess. But it doesn’t mean Namjoon or Jimin are leaving you behind."

You nod, sniffing as you wipe away your tears. "I know, but... it's just overwhelming seeing everything unfold."

He reaches out and gently tilts your chin up, meeting your gaze with his warm eyes. "You're not alone in this, Y/N. We're here for you, and we're all figuring things out as we go along."

His words strike a chord within you, a sense of comfort washing over you in the midst of your emotional storm. Yoongi's presence feels like an anchor, grounding you when everything feels chaotic.

Then, without warning, he looks at you intensely and asks, “Since we’re having this conversation, I’m questioning whether you like Jimin based on what you just said…"

You blink, caught off guard by the sudden change in topic. "What? No! Jimin's like a brother to me. A reliable brother who understands me pretty well…” You pause a bit and mumble, “Well at least he used to."

He nods, his gaze unrelenting yet thoughtful, as if he's trying to read between the lines of your response. But then he asks another question that left you momentarily speechless.

"What about Namjoon?"

You hesitate, your mind racing. Your feelings for Namjoon have always been a bit more complex, and you aren't sure how to put them into words. Namjoon was your first friend out of the trio of him, Yoongi, and Jimin. He was 7 when he moved in next door from Korea as his dad got a new job working as a Chemical Engineer for an energy company in the US. You got along well with him as kids who both played Pokemon games and he was the only person you could trade with. He’s also the one who gave you his shiny purple Wailmer from his Pokemon Emerald. Eventually as you got older, you both came to enjoy reading books and art history. What does he mean to you?

Before you can muster a response to that, Yoongi suddenly adds another question, his voice gentle yet persistent. “What about me?”

Your gaze flickers to him, and you find yourself locking eyes with him. Then you quickly look away, focusing on the purple lighting in the bathroom. 

This questions starts to add new thoughts that you hadn’t really considered due to your worries about Namjoon and Jimin. However now, the intensity of this current moment is almost overwhelming, and you feel a swirling mix of emotions within you. Yoongi's proximity, his unwavering gaze, and the weight of his questions are all converging, pulling you into a realm of introspection and vulnerability.

Yoongi seems to sense your uncertainty, your inner struggle. He steps closer, his presence enveloping you. His gaze remains fixed on yours, his face just inches away from yours. The air between you is charged, heavy with unspoken words and unexplored emotions. "You can tell me," he urges softly, his voice a gentle whisper that brushes against your skin.

As you look into his eyes again, your heart races. The alcohol has lowered your inhibitions, and in this moment, everything feels so intense, so raw. You try to form words, but they fail you. Instead, you let your gaze speak for you, letting your emotions flow through the unspoken connection between you. Suddenly Namjoon and Jimin are blurring away to only afterimages in your current state of mind. All you see in great focus is Yoongi right now.

Without another word, Yoongi closes the distance between you, his lips meeting yours in a gentle, tentative kiss. The world around you fades away, and all that matters is the warmth of his touch, the taste of his lips, and the rush of emotions that swirls between you.

The kiss is a silent confession, a release of feelings that have been building up for far too long. When Yoongi finally pulls away, his forehead rests against yours, his breath slightly uneven.

"Y-Yoongi..," you whisper, a mix of surprise and wonder in your voice.

Yoongi chuckles softly, his thumb brushing against your cheek. "Sometimes, things don't need to be said. They just need to be felt."

As you stand there, locked in each other's gaze, you realize that this unexpected turn of events has brought you closer to Yoongi in ways you didn’t anticipate. It’s a new chapter, a chance to explore something deeper and more meaningful between you.

With a gentle smile, he leans in to kiss you again, and this time, there is no hesitation, no uncertainty—just the promise of a connection that has been there all along, waiting to be acknowledged.

And so, in the dimly colored bathroom of the Gamma Omega Tau house, amid the sounds of distant laughter and music, you and Yoongi quickly unite lips once again.

As the intensity between you and Yoongi grows, the bathroom seems to shrink around you, leaving only the two of you enveloped in a bubble of shared emotion. His lips press against yours with a newfound urgency, a hunger that mirrors the feelings you have both kept hidden for so long. The taste of him is intoxicating, a blend of sweetness and warmth that sends shivers down your spine.

His hands find their way to your waist, pulling you closer to him. The touch of his fingertips against your skin sends a wave of electricity through your body, igniting a fire deep within you. Your own hands instinctively move to his chest, feeling the steady rhythm of his heartbeat beneath your palms.

The kiss deepens, a passionate dance of lips and tongues that leaves no room for doubts or reservations. Yoongi's fingers trail up your back, the sensation making your breath hitch. The world outside that bathroom seems distant, irrelevant, as your focus narrows down to the connection between your bodies and the raw emotion that flows between you.

A soft moan escapes your lips, a sound that seems to fuel the fire burning between you. Yoongi's lips leave yours, trailing a path of heated kisses down your jawline, his warm breath sending shivers across your skin. His hands move to your hips, pulling you against him, and you can feel his own desire pressing against your abdomen.

With a mix of urgency and tenderness, he captures your lips once more, pouring every unspoken word and hidden longing into the kiss. Your fingers thread through his hair, tugging lightly as his lips explore your neck, leaving a trail of fire in their wake. Your heartbeat pounds in your ears, each touch, each sensation sending ripples of pleasure through your body.

The soft fabric of your clothes seems like an obstacle now, an unnecessary barrier between your skin and his. Yoongi's fingers deftly work at the buttons of your tube top, his touch leaving a trail of fire along your exposed skin. Your breath hitches as his lips find the sensitive curve of your neck, his teeth grazing your skin gently, causing a shiver to course through you.

In a moment of boldness, your hands move to the hem of his shirt, pulling it up to reveal his bare chest. Your fingers trace the contours of his muscles, feeling the rise and fall of his breath beneath your touch. His lips find yours once again, a hungry, fervent kiss that speaks of the intensity of your emotions.

With a skillful touch, Yoongi lifts you up onto the bathroom counter, the cool surface sending a shock through your body. He stands between your legs, his hands moving to cup your face, thumbs brushing over your cheeks as he gazes into your eyes.

"I've wanted this for so long," he murmurs, his voice rough with desire.

You can only respond with a breathless nod before his lips crash against yours again. Not fully understanding the words that just left his mouth. The kiss deepens, a mixture of passion and tenderness that leaves you dizzy with sensation. His hands explore every curve of your body, memorizing the feel of your skin beneath his fingertips.

Your own hands aren't idle either, roaming his chest and back, reveling in the sensation of his skin against yours. The heat between you was undeniable, a magnetic pull that draws you closer with every passing second. And in that bathroom, amid the swirling emotions and the touch of your lips, you feel an unspoken promise taking root—a promise of something more, something real and beautiful.

The outside world fades into insignificance. The party, the noise, the worries about Namjoon and Jimin and everyone else—all of it melts away, leaving only the two of you and the intensity of this moment. As you hold onto each other, lost in the depths of your feelings, you know that this is a turning point that will permanently alter your friendship with Yoongi.

As the kisses between you and Yoongi continue, the electricity in the air grows stronger, pulling you both further into the depths of your shared desire. Every touch, every caress is a testament to the unspoken connection that has been building between you for so long. It’s as if the universe has finally aligned, allowing you to explore the feelings that have been simmering beneath the surface.

A soft, almost desperate, sound escapes Yoongi's lips as he reluctantly pulls away from the kiss, his forehead resting against yours as he tries to catch his breath. His eyes, dark and intense, lock onto yours, and you can see the raw emotions swirling within them.

"We should... we should get out of here," he murmurs, his voice rough with a mixture of longing and uncertainty.

You nod in agreement, feeling a rush of excitement and nerves course through you. This is a pivotal moment, a decision that could potentially change the course of your relationship. With a shared understanding, you both turn away from the party scene and make your way through the crowd towards the exit.

The cool night air hits you as you step outside, a welcome contrast to the heated intensity of the party. Yoongi's hand finds yours, his fingers intertwining with yours as you walk side by side down the dimly lit streets. The silence between you is charged with anticipation, every step bringing you closer to a new chapter in your story.

When you finally arrive back at the house, the atmosphere is different—quieter, more intimate. Namjoon didn’t come use the house like he said he would yesterday, you briefly recall. Maybe that’s a good thing. The GOT party is still in full swing, he is there with Jihyo, but you and Yoongi are in your own world here with no one to stop what is happening. The journey up the stairs to your shared house feels like a blur, your heart racing in anticipation of what is to come.

Once inside, you both head straight to your bedroom. The air is thick with tension, the unspoken yet silly question hangs in the air: Is this really happening? As you close the door locking it behind you, the outside world fades away, leaving only the two of you in the cocoon of your own space.

Yoongi turns to you, his gaze searching yours for reassurance. Without a word, you step closer, closing the distance between you. His hands find their way to your waist, pulling you gently against him. The touch of his body against yours sends a shiver of electricity through you, a reminder of the desire that has been building between you.

His lips find yours again, a kiss that holds all the pent-up longing and emotion that have been simmering beneath the surface. The taste of him, the feel of his lips moving against yours, is intoxicating. His hands roam your body with a reverence that sends waves of pleasure coursing through you.

With each kiss, each touch, the world around you fades away, leaving only the intensity of the moment. The bed is just a few steps away, an inviting sanctuary where you could explore the depths of your connection in private. Without breaking the kiss, you take his hand and lead him towards the bed, your heart pounding in anticipation.

As you stand at the edge of the bed, your eyes meet Yoongi's, a silent agreement passing between you. With a mixture of urgency and tenderness, you begin to undress each other, the air heavy with the weight of your shared desire. Yoongi's touch is gentle, his fingers tracing every curve of your body as he reveals the skin beneath your clothes.

Soon, you are both standing before each other, bare and vulnerable, yet completely unburdened by the weight of your emotions. You shyly stare down at Yoongi’s dick, admiring its pink, veiny appearance. It looks very girthy, potentially filling to the core. You're embarrassed to admit you might have imagined Yoongi naked before. When you were a middle schooler curiously imagining bodily differences between you and your male friends. But now seeing his beautiful body before you brings some excitement to your soft skin, some heat rushing through your core and nearly down your thighs, onto the floor. Your mouth suddenly dries and you feel self-conscious that your expression may be as plain and eager as it might be. He clears his throat, but that makes him more embarrassed. You bite your bottom lip, unsure of what to do.

He takes your hand and leads you to the bed. Yoongi's lips find yours once more, a kiss that speaks of promises and possibilities. With a gentle push, he guides you onto the bed, his body following yours as the kiss deepens.

The softness of the sheets beneath you, the heat of Yoongi's body against yours—it is a sensory overload, a symphony of sensations that leaves you breathless. You feel the cold sweat of his skin on yours as your bodies press together. His lips are against your jaw and your hands are exploring his body as much as you can with your legs around his hips. He climbs down to your mound and opens his mouth letting his warm, wet tongue lap over your clit. One of Yoongi's hands finds purchase on your hip to help you move with him while the long fingers of his other hand tease your enterance before pushing inside. His hot breath on your clit and his fingers inside you makes you want to beg for more. But the sensation is so intense it has rendered you speechless, the only noise to leave your mouth is a choked, muffled groan that only urges him further.

His tongue on you feels too good and you can only let him explore. You are enjoying the sensation and the way his fingers play your body like an instrument. You let out a loud gasp when you cum, your whole body arching towards him as pleasure washed over you, your thighs tightening around to his back. You feel your insides clench and throb as your orgasm washed over you in waves.

Yoongi smirks at you for a second as he lifts his head, removing his fingers from inside you. He climbs up your body until he reaches your lips. Your hand wraps around the back of his neck and you kiss him with fervor. You taste yourself in his mouth and it makes you hungry for more. You feel the pressure in your abdomen again, desperate for more. His body is hard, but not to the point of being uncomfortable. It’s a gentle pressure, a delicious tension that makes you want more. 

"Y-Yoongi... I need more.." You whimper against his mouth, your tongue running over his bottom lip before you pull away and look into his eyes. "Please, I need more..."

"I've got you, angel." He whispers reassuringly before he moves away briefly to retrieve the condom he keeps handy in his wallet in case he ever needs it. The new nickname catches you off guard as he usually tends to call you Sunshine unless you’re having a serious conversation, like earlier. However you kind of like this name.

He opens the package with his teeth and rolls the rubber on himself. You whimper when you feel the head of his cock press against you. He slowly pushes inside, but it’s enough to make your head spin. His length fills you perfectly and you can feel yourself pulsate around him. He makes his way slowly inside you, pushing deeper until he is completely inside you. He then rests his forehead against yours. You look into each other's eyes and the intensity of his gaze is almost enough to make you cum right then and there.

"You're doing so well for me," He speaks softly, his voice hoarse with arousal. His praises pull a moan from your lips you can't supress.

He slowly pulls out then pushes back in watching as his cock disapears inside you. He pulls out again and does the same thing. His thrusts become faster with each time he pushes back inside. As your moans become louder, his thrusts become more eager. He adjusts himself until he finds a position that has his cock hitting your g-spot with each thrust, your legs lifting over his hips and your hands roaming his body to keep yourself grounded.

Yoongi's leaves small kisses along your neck and down to your breasts as he continues to fuck you. He acts carefully with each action he takes, and makes a point to watch your reaction for the slightest sign of discomfort. He never stops praising you, whispering how good you were for him and how much he loves having you like this, taking all of him. His sultry low voice is making you even more sensitive and it’s a bit overwhelming, but it somehow helps make your depressing thoughts from earlier at the party disappear. With him, you felt safe and cared for.

His hands come to cup your breast and you cry out as your body arches towards him. He keeps one hand cupping your breast and takes your nipple between his fingers and gently pinches it, eliciting a softer whimper from you. 

You pull Yoongi against you closing the gap between your bodies, your fingers grip his hair tightly as you cry out, your insides clenching around him. Your back arches off the bed as your orgasm washed over you once again. He fucks you through your orgasm, and when your legs relaxed over his hips, he keeps pushing inside you. The sensation makes you want to cry from overstimulation, but at the same time you beg for more. His cock inside you feels too good, the pleasure is too much. You don't know what to do with your body or if you should be doing something at all. Your hands find their way up his forearms and hold on to them tightly.

"Do it," You whisper intimately. "Cum for me, Yoongi..."

Your words are added motivation for him to do just that. As he moves, his thrusts pushing deeper inside you, a cascade of sensations courses through both your bodies. Your back arches instinctively, a testament to the overwhelming pleasure that envelops you. He responds by lowering himself, his forehead meeting yours in an exquisite intimacy that intensifies the connection between you two.

Amidst the whirlwind of ecstasy, a thought flits through your consciousness—a moment of profound gratitude for the intoxicating sound of Yoongi's moans. It's a melody you never envisioned hearing, a symphony of vulnerability and shared pleasure that resonates deep within you. This unexpected harmony adds a new layer to your connection, stoking the flames of desire and amazement that consume every inch of your being. It leaves you feeling content and relaxed.

Yoongi's body shudders against yours, his moans gradually subsiding into contented sighs. With a gentle sigh of satisfaction, he slides his cock out and shifts on the bed, rolling over to lay beside you. Your chests rise and fall in tandem, the rhythm of your breaths slowly synchronizing as you find yourselves tangled in the aftermath of passion.

You both move again, laying side by side. Both of you catch your breath, the world around you receding into a hazy background as your gazes lock. Eyes that have seen each other's vulnerabilities, laughter, and shared moments now reflect a new layer of intimacy that words could never capture. 

The lingering cocoons you both in a silence that speaks volumes. It's Yoongi who takes the initiative to pierce through the quiet, his voice carrying a breathless quality that mirrors the aftermath of your passion.

"How are you feeling now?" His words hang in the air, delicate yet heavy with unspoken meaning. His eyes hold a mixture of curiosity and concern, a testament to his attentiveness even in the midst of his own unraveling.

A playful smile tugs at your lips, your voice laced with a hint of mischievousness as you respond to his inquiry. "Never better," you answer, your words bathed in the soft notes of a giggle that dances between you.

His laughter echoes yours, a harmonious symphony of shared joy that envelops the space between you. It's a sound that transcends the physical, a connection that binds you beyond the realm of touch. In his laughter, you sense a quiet affirmation—a declaration that the bond you've nurtured extends beyond the passionate moments, into the realm of comfort, friendship, and a connection that defies categorization.

As the night wears on and the intensity of your connection slowly ebbs away, you find yourselves wrapped in each other's arms, your bodies intertwined in a tender embrace. Yoongi's touch is reassuring, his fingers tracing gentle patterns on your skin as you lay together in the quiet darkness.

"I want you to know," Yoongi's voice was soft, his breath tickling your ear, "that no matter what happens, I'll always be here for you. You mean a lot to me, and I don't want you to ever doubt that."

His words warm your heart, a balm to the insecurities that have been lingering in the back of your mind. In his arms, you felt safe, cherished, and valued—emotions that have been elusive for so long.

"I feel the same way," you admit, your voice barely above a whisper. "You've always been there for me, Yoongi, and I'm grateful for that."

The quiet moment between you is filled with unspoken understanding. It is a pact, a promise to stand by each other's side no matter what challenges lay ahead. In this moment, the weight of your fears seemed to be lifted, replaced by a sense of comfort and reassurance.

But the hours drift by, and as the night grows deeper and the two of you grow more sober, the lingering consequences of your actions begin to cast a shadow over your thoughts. The warmth of Yoongi's embrace can't dispel the nagging worry that what you’ve done could have far-reaching ramifications.

It was the alcohol that further fueled your doubts, the liquid courage dulling your ability to rationalize. In the haze of your tipsy stupor, you begin to wonder if the intensity of the night is a result of the moment, the shared emotions, or simply the effect of alcohol clouding your judgment.

Despite Yoongi's assurances, the fear of what could come next gnaws at you. What if this changes everything? What if it ruins the friendship that has been the foundation of your relationship? The questions spiral in your mind, a whirlwind of doubt and uncertainty that refuses to be silenced.

In an attempt to push those thoughts away, you cuddle closer into Yoongi's chest. It is a fleeting distraction, a way to drown out the voices of doubt that echoed in the back of your mind. The feeling of Yoongi’s warmth becomes a welcome distraction from the complex emotions that threaten to overwhelm you.

-

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A/N: HELLO! Did you like the first chapter?! would it be crazy if i told you I had been planning this fic since 2021 but never got the chance to really delve into it until right now?? Well that's exactly what happened. I'd love to hear your feedback on this fic! pls reblog and like if you enjoyed! I am currently working on chapter 2 and bits of chapter 3, so I hope to get it done by early/mid-September, so please look forward to it!

[vnti-vnxiety-recs]

Petty Wars

★  PAIRING: mingyu x fem!reader

☆ WORD COUNT: 7.5k

★ GENRE(S): smut, kinda switch!Mingyu, established relationship

☆ SUMMARY: An argument between you and Mingyu leads to a 7 day war of stubbornness to see who cracks first to apologize. Aka I don't know how to summarize, just read it

★ ☆ WARNINGS: smut/unprotected sex/, kinda toxic!relationship?, swearing, sexual acts, mentions of drinking/smoking, rough handling, not really proofread

☆★ NOTES: This is my first ever fanfic y'all PLEASE have mercy. lmk if y'all liked it. reblog/like I might write a lil sum sum here and there. no but this scenario came to me while at work i just had to write it down lol

Just like any other Friday night, you and Mingyu find yourselves at one of Jeonghans' many parties. By the time you get there, everyone is already tipsy. Jeonghan and Seungcheol are already starting up another round of beer Pong against Soonyoung and Jihoon. You can see Dino out of the corner of your eye dancing to the beat of the music coming from the speakers that Seungkwan is currently sitting in front of. Seungkwan isn't one for parties but tends to get dragged to them by accompanying Vernon, who is DJing tonight's party. Seungkwan is Vernon's tech guy and helps with equipment. He seems to be the only one sober so far. You turn to Mingyu and smile. 

"oh looks like we came too late, they already started without us." You yawn, stretching your arms upwards, hiking your short black dress up in the process. "alright let's dip" you make to turn around when Mingyu catches your shoulder. 

"come on, you promised we wouldn't leave early this time," he practically whines.

Despite your near-perfect party attendance, you would actually rather be at home than out partying. Mingyu, on the other hand, being the extravert he is, loved partying with his former dorm mates. 

Due to your clashing schedules, you would rather be out with Mingyu than home alone. With your love for Mingyu outweighing your hatred for parties, you find yourself attending one every Friday.

"Ugh, I'm too sober for this. Let's get wasted already. " You roll your eyes. 

"That's my precious baby," he coos mockingly.

"whatever Gyu, I'm going to go get us drinks. Find us somewhere to sit." With that, you make your way to the kitchen, not hearing Mingyu's response.

For a college student, Jeonghan was loaded, and despite popular belief, it was not his parent's money. Everything he has, he owns himself. How does he do it? Maybe a little conning here drug dealing there, but we don't talk about that. We're just here for a good time.

You're pouring a cup for your boyfriend when you see Seungkwan make his way into the space. 

"Kwan~," you sing, wiggling your fresh set of nails at him. 

"this bitch," he sighs. "what are you doing here again? I told you we're closed go home." he playfully bumps your shoulder, trying to take the liquor bottle from your hands.

"Hush boy, I just got here. Have you had anything to drink tonight?" You giggle at his antics

Seungkwan pulls a face with a mocking smile and salutes, "I'm on the job, plus I have to drive Vernon and his precious equipment home," he says, making you burst out laughing 

"How's my favorite duo?," you ask, taking a sip from the cup you originally poured for Mingyu. "Have you told him you want to be more than just his tech guy?" You quirk a brow at him. 

"ugh let's not talk about it, I don't need people knowing I have a crush on that fucking idiot" he throws his head back in anguish

 You smile at his comment and shrug. "Well, let's catch up later. I'm here with Gyu, and he's probably gonna throw a fit if I keep him waiting any longer. Text me, ok babe?" You make a shaking motion with your hand similar to a phone ringing.

"Alright, bye slut. " He flicks you off lovingly and walks back out toward the DJ booth. "Ask Vern when the next smoke sesh is," you yell after him. He continues to walk, but you can see his head shaking with amusement. 

You will admit you spent more time catching up with Seungkwan than you previously thought. When you make it back into the living room with both you and Mingyu's drinks, you see Mingyu seated on the couch with a red solo cup in hand and a girl sitting on his left. They seem to be deep in conversation as you continue to watch with a quirked brow. "Here we go," you say to yourself and roll your eyes. 

Mingyu is one of the sweetest people you have ever met. He's handsome... and funny....and charming.. and ok, you get the point. He's very popular around campus, and girls never fail to flirt with him even in front of you. Usually, he shrugs them off and ignores their advances, but this time is different it seems.

You approach the two, being the "bold bitch" as Seungkwan likes to call you, you sat squarely in Mingyu's lap, surprising him a bit. 

"oh babe, where have you been? I've been sitting here forever don't you know how thirsty I wa-" 

"Seems like you already found a drink." You cut him off, not paying attention to his whining. You look toward the girl sitting beside him.

"Hello, and what was your name pretty girl?" You question.

You may be jealous, but you're not rude, or at least you try not to be. This girl has done nothing wrong so far. She even smiles at your compliment. 

"Hey, I'm Yeun, I'm guessing you're Mingyu's girlfriend?" You nod politely. 

"Yeun is my friend from middle school. She just started attending this month. Isn't that crazy?" Mingyu states as he excitedly shakes your shoulder. 

"Yeaaa amazing," you tight smile. "well ill let you two catch up. " Your grip tightens, clutching onto both drinks that you have been carrying.

Downing one of the drinks, you get up and excuse yourself. Mingyu reaches out to get you to stay, but you just shove the other drink in his hand. 

"looks like you're running low, here." You smile at him.

Mingyu knows you too well. He can tell you're irritated and decides to let you cool off, choosing to bring it up later. 

Annoyed, you walk around the house until you find the person you're looking for. Spotting him out by the edge of the pool, you walk over with a smile. "Hao!" You wave, catching his attention. Minghao looks up from his phone and smiles, kicking his feet from their spot in the pool, trying to splash you. "Nice try asshole, cut it out. " You complain and take a seat behind him in one of the pool chairs. He gets up and sits beside you. 

"what's up..or what's wrong? You look pissed." His ever-attentive eyes zero in, making his brows furrow. 

"ok, lemme rant real quick and then you can tell me how much of a stupid dramatic bitch I'm being" you sigh.

You give hao a quick rundown of the scene in the living room with Mingyu and pretty girl Yeun. You wait for him to talk some sense into you.

"You're being dramatic. Mingyu is literally always following like a lost puppy." 

You kick your feet dramatically proving his point. "I know, but ugh, you should have seen the way he was looking at her! His eyes were practically shining!" 

Hao pulls his phone back out, already knowing you're about to go off again. He was going to be here for a while. He listened intently, and after you whined to Hao a little more, you started to feel a bit better. You let out a loud sigh and shrug your shoulders. 

"yea, you're right, Hao. I am dramatic" 

"I know. " He doesn't look up from his phone but hears you get up. He waves at your retreating figure, knowing you're probably going back inside to see Mingyu.

As you walk back in you hear a ding in your purse and pull out your phone to see hao send you a funny tik-tok, the caption reading "when your friend goes right back to the bitch she was just crying about." You turn around with a laugh and mouth a 'no literally'

You lock your phone and make your way back to Mingyu. Unlike before, you sat back in his lap with a little less determination. He looks up from his conversation. 

"Did you go pout?" 

It annoys you that he can read you like an open book. You roll your eyes "lets gooo~" you try to whisper 

"in a bit, I'm still catching up" he shrugs off your behavior and goes back to talking to Yeun. 

You sit quietly for a bit until their shared laughter starts grating on your nerves. You're irritated all over again. That cup of liquor from earlier starts tasting a little like this bitch trying to steal my man. You shake the thought from your head. Knowing you might get rowdy, you get up and make your way to the front porch for some fresh air. You look behind you to see if Mingyu even noticed. 

"Still talking to Pretty girl? ok, I see how it is," you say under your breath before pulling the front door open and leaving. 

You didn't like to make yourself out to be a drama queen because you really did try to be a better and more understanding person, but once that liquor starts talking, you start feeling petty and now you gotta go the whole extra mile.

You call an Uber and go home. One thing about you is that if you feel unwanted, you're gonna leave. Simple as that. You make it home and throw your shoes off, already about to start the petty war. 

You grab your extra blankets from the hallway closet and make your way to the guest room. You begin setting up your makeshift camp for however long this war was going to be. You are stubborn, yes, but Mingyu is right there with you in terms of pettiness. You grab your charger from the bedroom, your switch from the living room, and some snacks from the kitchen. You lock yourself in your new makeshift room. Even through your anger, you send Mingyu a quick text telling him you went home and that you're safe. Yes, he pissed you off, but you know he would have a heart attack if anything happened to you. You're all ready to go. You shut off your phone, knowing he's gonna blow it up once he notices you've left. You turn on your switch to binge your favorite game. 

You must have dozed off because you're awoken by the front door shutting with a bang. You can already tell Mingyu is annoyed. He makes a straight shot for the guest room, knowing you go in there when you're upset. He tries the doorknob. You're not a rookie. Of course it's locked. You can hear him let out a humorless laugh.

"ok, that's how we're playing, huh? Stop being childish, come out here and talk to me." 

"Oh, so now you notice me? Didn't seem to wanna talk when you were too busy at the party flirting with other bitches."

A part of you cringed at the word, not really wanting to call her out of her name, but aye, we already here. Fuck it.

"I told you were just friends. I'm not about to explain myself, you're being dramatic." 

You jump out from under the covers and swing the door open. " First you wanna talk, now it's 'I don't have anything to explain'. What do you want Gyu?" 

"I want you to stop being annoying and come get in the bed. " 

Andddd it's game on. 

More than anything, you hate being called annoying. You also hate being called childish, but you let that one slide because there was some truth to it, but annoying?? Now it's up.

"You wanna know what's annoying? going to get drinks, and I come back to you giving my spot up to someone else. What's annoying, is when I tried to join in on the laughs and giggles, and you ignore me the entire conversation, like I'm not LITERALLY sitting in your face." You huff 

"What's annoying, is me leaving at-" you look up at the ceiling and press a finger to your chin in thought 

"1 am, you not noticing or reading my text till 2 am, just for you to get home at -" you grab his wrist and look at his Rolex "3 am. But you know what? I am annoying. Let me be annoying in my own bed tonight. goodnight, Kim Mingyu. " You gently shut the door in his face with a sickeningly sweet smile, not letting him get a word in. 

Mingyu would be stunned if he wasn't already used to your antics. He knew you were just lashing out and would be back under him tomorrow. Even so, something about you calling him Kim Mingyu pissed him off a little. You never called him Kim Mingyu. He shrugged it off and walked back to the main bedroom. If you wanted to throw a tantrum over not getting his attention for a couple of hours, he would let you. He knew you needed to cool down anyway, so he got ready for bed, deciding to try again with you tomorrow.

Back at your "camp," as you liked to call it, you did cool down and realize that, yes, maybe you were overreacting a bit. Your feelings were still valid though. So, what did you decide to do to convey those feelings to Mingyu? Be an adult, sit down, and have a healthy conversation? Of course not. You were too stubborn and prideful to apologize. Maybe even a little embarrassed that you acted out. So instead, you decide to stay locked in your room until Mingyu apologizes :)

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DAY1

You wake up the next morning well-rested and in a better mood. Mingyu tends to hog most of the covers, smother you in your sleep because of his clingy tendencies, and take up half the bed due to his large frame. So you were able to sleep soundly all night long.

You can already smell the breakfast that Mingyu is cooking, instantly putting you in an even better mood. At this point, you have started to totally forget why you were even upset last night. You get up to go brush your teeth and take a quick morning shower. You had skipped one the night before too angry to go into the main bathroom, afraid you would run into Mingyu.

While he's busy in the kitchen, you sneak into the bathroom and shower. By the time you come out, you assume Mingyu is already done preparing the meal and is now eating because as you approach the kitchen; you see him seated with his back towards you. You assume he made you a plate, like he always does. You walk around to the other side of the table just to be met with nothing, just the wood top of the table. Mingyu, who is across from you, eats his meal with a smug look on his face. 

"where's mine?" you cross your arms across your chest. 

"where's my apology?"

"apolo- apology?!" you sputter mouth agape. 

"yes. I want an apology for the way you acted yesterday. " He takes a bite out of a piece of bacon and then holds it out to you.

You lean in, ready to take a bite, when he withdraws his outstretched arm back toward himself. "not until you apologize," he tuts. 

"Huh, are you insane? You're gonna starve me until I apologize? For what? apologize for you ignoring me all night at the party?" Here you were getting ready to forget about the whole thing when he has the audacity to ask for an apology? In your eyes, you're the innocent one here!

You huff out a sigh. "How about you apologize first and then I follow after?" 

"What are you, a toddler?" 

"SAYS THE ONE THREATENING TO STARVE ME!" 

"you can take care of yourself" 

"I don't wanna take care of myself. I want you to spoil me," you say with a hint of aegyo to butter him up. 

He ignores your whines and continues to eat, soon finishing up his plate and placing it in the sink. 

"Fine, be that way! I just won't come back to the room until you apologize to me!" You grumble

"That's okay. I just won't make you breakfast until you own up and admit you were showing out last night. " 

"Oh yeah! Well, I won't talk to you until you admit you were totally gushing over Yeun!" 

"well looks like I'm never apologizing because that never happened! Just admit you were jealous!" he's growing frustrated and begins to walk out of the kitchen 

"hah fine...I won't touch you either." You threatened

This seems to stop him in his tracks. He turns to you with a smirk and closes the gap in distance between the two of you. Mingyu leans down to be eye to eye with you. "let's see how long that last princess" his eyes flutter down to your lips and then back up again to make eye contact. 

Unimpressed, you step around him into the living room turning on the tv. "Ha, because I'm the one that can't keep it in their pants. Yea right, Mingyu you practically live off of affection. Good luck to you. " 

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DAY2 

You're on your 2nd day of sleeping in the guest room. Although you're sleeping better, you can't help but start to feel lonely all by yourself. As corny as it sounds, the nights are starting to feel colder. you miss the way Mingyu would wrap his arms around you at night and keep you pressed against his chest. You missed the way his hair would tickle your face in the morning. You missed his good morning kisses, and you missed seeing him first thing in the morning. If you were going to get him to apologize, you had to work fast.

You get up and make your way to the Main bathroom. You refused to shower in the guest bathroom, preferring your garden tub over the guest bathroom's alcove tub. Lucky for you, Mingyu liked to sleep in. You had free rein in the bathroom, not having to worry about confronting him. You were afraid that your vulnerable morning thoughts from earlier would make you lose face in front of him. After washing up, you sneak out of the bathroom only to see Mingyu wide awake, covers thrown from his body as he crawls out of bed. One look at him, and you knew you had to get out of there ASAP! Mingyu sits on the edge of the bed, rubbing sleep from his eyes. His hair is a mess from last night's sleep, similar to how it looks after a good pulling. When your eyes rake down his body, you are met with his naked chest. 

nope. nope. nope

If you let your eyes wander any longer, you just know you will pounce on him, so you fix your eyes on the door and make haste to get out of the room. Mingyu watches you scamper out of the room with a toothy smile and a yawn. "Good morning to you too princess. "

After that morning, you sit in your room and plot. He totally planned that. You know he did because he usually sleeps with a shirt on since he gets cold at night. You've decided, since Mingyu took the first shot, you had to make sure that your return fire left him feeling wounded and sorry. If Mingyu wanted to fight dirty, you were going to give him hell. 

That evening, Mingyu left the house to go shoot hoops with the boys, giving you time to stock up on ammo. You went into the main bedroom and looked through your drawers, finding all of Mingyu's favorite pieces of clothing. Your skimpy shorts, your low-cut tank tops, some sexy panties, and a few other things you knew to drive him crazy. You return to base feeling satisfied. You freshen up and change into your velvet booty shorts and matching velvet cropped tank top. You perch yourself on the living room couch and wait for battle.

About an hour later, you hear keys rattling to open the front door, and you spring into action. You toss the phone that's been keeping you company and straighten your posture. You sit up and watch him enter the house. It doesn't take long for his eyes to land on you, and you can immediately tell you have him right where you want him. You can't quite say you have the upper hand just yet because when he enters, he's glistening in sweat wearing a loose tank top and basketball shorts on.

This was not going to be an easy battle. 

His skin is practically glowing. You can't help but lick your lips a bit. This makes Mingyu raise an eyebrow at you with a smirk. He takes a hand and puts it under his shirt, lifting the bottom to wipe the sweat from his brow. Your eyes immediately take in his form. His muscled chest and abs practically begging to be licked clean from the sweat dripping down his body. Your eyes can't help but follow the one drop of sweat that rolls down from his neck, guided through the valley of his pecs, past his abs, and into his navel. You have to rip your eyes away. All your hard work will be for nothing if you don't get it together.

You make your way out from the living room and into the kitchen, grabbing ice cream from the freezer and heading back into the living room. When you return, Mingyu is seated where you were last on the couch, man-spreading, making his shorts ride up and giving you the perfect view of his thighs. He gave you a challenging look, waiting for your next more. At this point, you're ready to say fuck it all and ride his stupid thigh, but you are determined to knock that stupid, smug look off his face.

You put on a show looking for the remote to turn on a movie. You bend over to look for the remote, knowing damn well it's sitting on the coffee table in front of both of you. you play stupid for a little while longer, letting him enjoy the way your shorts ride up as you "look" for the remote 

"you really want that apology huh?" Mingyu chuckles. 

You ignore him, finally turning and faking a gasp. "oh there it is! Silly me. " You grab the remote only to drop it. Oh no, would you look at that? You dropped the remote right in front of Mingyu's spread thighs. You crouch down to grab it, giving Mingyu a full view down the front of your tank-top, boobs practically spilling out in the process. 

"My bad, let me get that." You purr seductively 

As you're coming back up from the ground, you use one of Mingyu's thighs as leverage to pull yourself up. As you're making your way to stand up, you lean more into him than necessary, letting your palm slide up his thigh, pushing the pant leg of his shorts up even higher. You hear a gasp come from him as he grasps your wrist 

"Please baby...don't wanna fight anymore." He looks into your eyes with a groan and licks his lips. "please ill be good for you, I promise." 

You tilt your head with a smile. "Good enough for me that you will apologize?" 

"Don't start with that. " 

"You started it first. Now beg for me to touch you. " You grasp him through his shorts.

"fuck can't take it... please... I need you." He pulls you in for a kiss. 

You're quick to place a palm over his lips, snatching your other hand from him. "I'm still not hearing an apology?" 

"your seriously gonna do this? I'm so hard right now, don't you miss me?" he pouts up at you.

You look down at his lap for confirmation. You find that he is indeed straining against his shorts. You have to physically bite back a moan. 

"That's right baby, it's all for you, come here" he tries to pull you in again but you completely pull off this time. 

Cue the whining. 

Mingyu ends his short tantrum with a huff. You run a hand through his hair until he relaxes against you with a sigh. You tighten your grip immediately and drag his head back.

"Didn't I say I wouldn't touch you until you apologize? I'm not playing with you puppy. " You set him with a hard glare before removing your hand and grabbing your forgotten ice cream and walking back to your room.

"let me know when you start feeling a little apologetic puppy," you yawn with a stretch "until then you're on your own." you don't spare a glance in his direction and shut your door behind you

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DAY5

A few days have passed since the "remote incident" as you like to call it. Honestly, you were surprised he's been able to keep his hands to himself this long. Mingyu is usually insatiable. you know he must be up to something, but you don't care, all truths will be revealed in due time. 

One thing has gotten better though. Mingyu has started making you breakfast again. He couldn't bear to watch you struggle in the kitchen any longer. You never learned to cook, always telling your mother that it wasn't necessary because you would just marry a chef. 

you're not married but eh, close enough, a win is a win. 

You hate to admit it after all those years, but looks like your mom was right. The last couple of days were rough. You tried to follow a few recipes on your own but somehow always screwed up the measurements, causing the meals to end in disaster. So maybe it is important to cook for yourself. The least you could do was learn the basics to help Mingyu out around the house. This week put into perspective how hard and exhausting cooking is. You don't know what you would do without Mingyu. you're just glad that although you two are both ridiculously stubborn, your love for each other still shines through all that hard-headedness. 

You can't help but look across the table and steal glances at your boyfriend. Your heart warms as you watch him enjoy his meal. You finish up and head to your room. 

Nothing major happened for the rest of the day. You just lazed around, did some school work, and took a nap. Mingyu was out of the house today. You took some time to enjoy having the house to yourself. After your mid-day nap, you go to shower. Tonight, you were going out with some friends, so you get dressed and grab your stuff. You settle for something a little more toned down than usual since you were just going to a friend's house and then maybe to a bar for a few drinks. You text Mingyu telling him not to wait up for you as you head out. 

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It had gotten pretty late, and although you were seriously contemplating just crashing at your friend's house; you decide to head back home, nothing beating the comfort of your own bed. Your group of friends finishes up your drinks and begins bidding each other goodbye.

"You sure you don't want to just crash with us tonight?" your friend, Jae suggests.

"Yea, aren't you like having that weird fight with Mingyu right now anyway?" your other friend Chaeyeon chimes in.

You sigh at the reminder that yes; you are currently fighting with your super hot boyfriend when all you really want to do was have him pound you into the mattress, attention too occupied to argue with you or make any slick comments. You're already starting to regret waging this entire war. The thought of how many orgasms you would have had by now is killing you.

How's that saying go? play stupid games, win stupid prizes? yea, you have definitely started to feel like an idiot over the past couple of days.

"yes ok I know we are fighting, but I seriously hate sleeping anywhere other than my own bed"

"aren't you staying in the guest room of your apartment right now?" Chae points out 

You tilt your head with a sarcastic smile. "Your point?"

"Isn't that like literally the same thing?" Jae counters with a side eye

"well I'm only staying in there because I was being a crybaby and now I gotta face the consequences of my actions," you groan "but it's okay, ill be ending this soon"

"Oh, your gonna apologize?" Minnie pokes his head over into your conversation.

You hate to have come this far and lose, but you haven't been fucked in the past 5 days and it's starting to mess with your head. Yesterday, you swore that you were seeing double and that your vagina started talking to you. You were gonna go crazy soon if one of you didn't cave first.

"why do I have to apologize? " you whine again about the topic for the umpteenth time

"Babe, we all know you don't care about giving a little stank apology. You're just too much of a sore loser to drop the act and admit defeat." Jae sighs.

 You think his word over, and you agree. Normally, you would have already apologized by now if that meant having Mingyu rearrange your guts. But the circumstances are different. You already put on a show, threw a tantrum, and started the war. You were too prideful to admit you were wrong or that you overreacted.

Annoyed that your friends could see right through you, you open your phone and call an Uber home. 

"oo she mad" Min snickers

"I'm not mad, I'm tired, and I'm going home," you fake sniffle, begging for sympathy from your friends.

"You're so extra," Chae bursts out laughing.  

"I don't care. You guys are being mean to me!" you clutch your purse closer to your body and glare at your friend's.

"I've literally been deprived of dick for like the last 5 days? You should know how sensitive I am right now! I thought this would be easy, but it seems like im the only one affected. That brat is doing just fine it seems"

"oh yea, he's the brat," your friends say in unison.

Your friends being used to your antics can't help but laugh at the whole situation. Only you could get yourself wrapped up in something like this.

"my Ubers here losers" 

"get home safe slut," Chae smiles

Done with making a scene, you make your exit

"call us when you get home," Jae nags

Your friends, used to your behavior by now, know you weren't actually upset and were just expressing your frustration over the situation you got yourself into. You love that they were able to understand your actions and accept the fact you were a little extra. You wave them goodbye and leave to go find your Uber only having a few more minutes before they cancel your ride.

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You get home at around 1:30 am; you assume Mingyu is fast asleep, given the fact that when you entered, all the lights were shut off and he was nowhere to be seen. You accept the fact that you may have to use the stupid guest bathroom to wash up before bed. You tip-toe down the hall towards your room when you stop in your tracks. The main bedroom was a little further down the hall. You notice the bedroom door cracked, but that's not what halted your movements.

Just faintly, if you hold your breath, you can hear heavy breathing and the muffled sound of skin slapping against skin. the fact that you have been on edge the last couple of days due to dick deficiency must have made you extra sensitive to the familiar sounds coming from the room. You can immediately imagine what he's in there doing. So that's how he's been getting through the days unbothered. you were certain that after the remote incident, he would cave that night and come to you with an apology. The only thing he was coming to was his fist, it seemed. 

"that's totally cheating" you grumble under your breath, extra annoyed at the fact that you didn't think to do that first instead of going to sleep horny. in your defense, you were positive he would cave any day now.

You're making your way to the door, just about to push it the rest of the way open and have your way with him when you stop. An evil grin makes its way across your lips. You know exactly how you're going to get Mingyu to apologize and to fuck you in the process.

Determined now more than ever, you grab the doorknob and shut the door, alerting Mingyu of your presence in the house. You turn back around and make your way to your room. You were going to put an end to this petty war.

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DAY6 

That morning, you hid out in your room until you heard the front door shut, marking Mingyu's departure. You remember Jihoon telling you a few days ago that the boys were hitting the gym and asked if you wanted to join. You had previously shown interest in a new workout routine that you wanted to try, and with Jihoon practically being the group's personal trainer, he was excited to acquire a new gym buddy. still fighting with Mingyu at the time, you declined to tell him you would have to reschedule. Looks like that ended up working in your favor. 

You make yourself breakfast, shower, and put on Mingyu's favorite lace set. getting ready took about an hour and a half, so you're not left with much time to start the show. You make your way to the main bedroom and head into your shared closet. You reach onto the top shelf of the closet, palms searching for your special box. cursing Mingyu under your breath for pushing it so far back, knowing he probably did it on purpose. What you were looking for was your toy box that Mingyu hated. he claimed he could make you feel better than all your toys combined. After finding out he was a man of his word, you retired your box to the closet. You pull out your favorite rose toy and dildo. You close the lid on the box, returning it to its previous spot. You exit the closet and sink into your bed. 

You missed your bed so much, your body practically melting into the mattress as you got comfortable. Mingyu's scent surrounded you. It seemed to be stronger than usual given the fact that his sent completely washed out yours during your 6-day absence.

You sigh contently, almost falling asleep before you shake yourself awake and get to work. He was going to be home soon, so you had to work yourself up. You turn on the rose to your desired setting and place it over the lace of your lingerie, not daring to remove it before Mingyu got a good look.

As your body starts to warm up, you trail a hand up to play with your nipples. You touch yourself until you're practically dripping onto the bed. Mingyu's scent heightens your pleasure. You turn to shove your face deeper into the pillow, letting out a whine at the familiar scent. When you turn up the settings on your toy, you moan at the delicious feeling. You can't help but roll your hips into the toy, imagination taking over. You think of all the ways Mingyu has fucked you in the past.

You soon hear the front door open, alerting you that Mingyu was home. For your plan to work, you needed to have as much control over your desire as possible, so you dial down the vibrations but still keep a small hum against your center. You can hear Mingyu close in on you as he grows closer to the room.

He finally makes it to the room, and when he enters, he comes in with freshly washed hair, low hanging sweats, and a tight black shirt. He must have showered at the gym. You almost have to rip the toy away from your core. You could come just from the sight of him. Mingyu's eyes land on your quivering thighs and heaving chest. He curses to himself as he makes his way over to the bed, getting ready to pounce on you. 

"Don't come any closer, or I'll stop." You can barely get out as you stretch your free hand out in front of you, pushing his chest back. He lets out a loud groan but listens well.

"You're going to go sit down over there in that chair like an obedient puppy and behave. You won't touch me until I permit you. Do you understand?"

Mingyu immediately follows your command and sits in the chair you strategically placed at the foot of your bed. 

"I heard you last night, you know? I bet it felt so good to cum in your hands instead of me. Did you make yourself feel as good as I make you feel?" You say sarcastically

"fuck, please let me-"

"Answer my question puppy or else you won't get anything from me tonight"

"Only you baby, only you can make me feel good. Let me make it up to you. I'll make you feel so good, I promise." Mingyu begins to palm himself through his pants as he rambles on.

"You had your chance puppy. I let you know I was home. You knew where I was, yet you chose to finish yourself off, so now you get to sit and watch as I do the same.

you ignore his insistent whining and squirming, shutting your eyes to focus on the feeling

"selfish...puppy," you say out of breath, arching your back at the stimulation

You hear more rustling coming from the chair Mingyu is sitting in and opening your eyes. You were met with the sight of him gently thrusting his hips up into his palm. you swear quietly under your breath at the look in his eyes, practically screaming to let him have you. 

"Sit still, no touching. you're gonna be a good puppy and sit there and take what I give you"

"Please," he begs 

"That's not what I wanna hear, you know what I wanna hear"

you grab the dildo previously hidden from Mingyu's view and rub it against your entrance, collecting your essence and coating the tip of the toy with it.

"I can't hear you baby, if you don't make it quick, ill just fuck myself" you threaten as you prod just the tip between your lips.

"fuck it. I'm sorry. I should have paid attention to you at the party. Please, just fuck me already," Mingyu cries with a heaving chest.

"good boy" you smirk as you throw the toys down and beckon him over with a finger

Mingyu springs from his spot in the chair, pulling his clothes off in the process and climbing into the bed

You reach for his hair and pull him close to your face, looking him dead in the eyes. He doesn't dare touch you yet until you permit him.

"I'm still in charge. You got that?"

he nods obediently 

"You can touch me now. " You breathe, releasing his hair and falling back on the bed. Mingyu immediately crashes his lips to yours in a hungry kiss, practically moaning into your mouth. He can't help but grind his hips against your core, almost shedding a tear at the feeling.

"i've missed you so bad... fuck." he begins

Moving down your body, kissing your neck, and down to your breast, he removes your bra in the process. While his mouth is busy working on your chest, he shoves a hand down your panties 

"your so wet, I can't wait to feel you stretched out on my cock. after all this time you think you can still take it?" he asks smugly

"You're not behaving puppy. Maybe you need something else to keep that mouth of yours busy. " You push his head down in between your legs. Mingyu happily takes the hint and pulls your panties down your legs, immediately attaching his mouth to your heat. He's barely started, and you're already losing control. Being unable to feel his touch for the past couple of days has made you even more sensitive than usual. Mingyu eats you out like a man starved, making you wrap your legs around his shoulders and bring a hand to his hair. You pull him further into you with a cry. You can't help but rock your hips into his mouth.

Mingyu's middle and ring fingers find your entrance again. Using your slick, he coats them enough to slip through and curve deep into your cunt. You watch him from your spot above him, you can see him grinding his hips deep into the mattress, making you smirk. It feels like you are getting close, so you pull him up, knowing if you finish now, you won't have enough energy for what you're planning next. Much to his dismay, you unlatch his mouth from you. Before he can get out a whine, you catch his lips in another heated kiss, sealing off any complaints from him. You can feel him get lost in the kiss, so you take this opportunity to push him onto his back, taking Mingyu by surprise. 

"Thank you for apologizing baby. " You trail a pointed nail down his body until you reach his throbbing cock. "I also want to apologize to you as well," you swing a leg over his hip, positioning yourself over him. "This is my way of making it up to you, ok?" you smile genuinely as you sink onto his thick cock. 

You would usually be able to take it with no issues, but since it's been a few days, it takes you a few more seconds to get comfortable. Mingyu can't help but moan at the feeling of you clenching around him as he takes your face into his hands and kisses you slowly. Before you pull away, you take this moment to fully adjust. As you pull up almost completely from him, you maintain eye contact before dropping back onto his lap. You watch as Mingyu throws his head back with a loud moan. You repeat this over and over until you find a steady rhythm. Mingyu grasps your hips, helping to guide you up and down his length. You switch pace to something quick and shallow, making you throw your head back at the feeling. You sit down completely on his lap, leaning back enough to hold on to his thighs for a minute to grind your cunt against him, wanting to feel him deep. Mingyu can't take it anymore and plants his feet on the bed. He begins fucking up into you from his position. You have to place your hands on his chest to keep steady.

"I'm almost there puppy...just like that...take it all"

Mingyu squeezes his eyes shut at your words, thighs beginning to shake

"I won't last..please let me cum princess"

"hold it, you're doing so well for me...my good boy. " 

He brings a hand down to your clit and begins to circle it roughly, losing his mind. He can barely hold it. This time tears really do stream down his face as he begs you to let him come. At the sight of his tears, you clench down on him hard and release all over his cock. 

"cum for me" is all it takes to have him release deep into you. You can feel him in your stomach with how deeply he's thrusting riding out his high. You fall next to him, having spent all your energy. You catch your breath and turn to him.

"I really am sorry for the way I acted. I should have tried to talk to you about it before throwing a fit"

"It's okay, I understand. If I saw you talking to some guy at a party I'd be pissed too"

you smile at his comment and can feel yourself drift off to sleep.

---------------------------------------------------

 DAY7 

The next morning you awake to the smell of breakfast. You move to get out of bed when you notice you're wearing a fresh change of clothes. Mingyu must have cleaned you up last night when you passed out. You also notice your stuff has been put back in their rightful spots that you had previously taken out to store in the guest room. You smile to yourself and make your way to find Mingyu. He's in the kitchen cooking breakfast for the two of you. A sense of normalcy falls over you and you are content with this feeling. No more petty arguments and wars. Everything is back to normal. 

He turns to you with a smile. "good morning princess" 

You take a seat and smile in return. You finish your breakfast with Mingyu and straighten up the guest room, returning it to its former state before your war. You spend the rest of the day catching back up with Mingyu. There were a lot of updates that you missed because you were too busy ignoring him. You swore that you would never let another disagreement go on for that long. You seriously missed hearing his voice.

With that, on the 7th day, everything was back to the way it was before, and the two of you fell back into your normal rhythm.

End~

[stinastar]

20 questions for fic writers

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 101! Wow! Keep in mind many are short, and one is an even shorter poem about eggs 🥚

2. What’s your total A03 word count? 188,209

3. What fandoms do you write for? I honestly don't know how to answer this properly haha. I still have drafts or thoughts for fics for Good Omens, The Witcher, James Bond, and Our Flag Means Death. I'm currently mainly into writing Jason Todd (Red Hood / Batman).

I just looked in my folder and I also have notes for a piece each for Lord of the Rings and Shadow and Bone, but it's unlikely those will ever be finished and posted lol.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos? Of Dragons and Heartbreak, we’ll rip up the map by the seams, Which Half?, Sweet Truth, The Dumb Brute and the Bardling. So all for The Witcher, unsurprisingly. I don't think this kind of metric means much, honestly. It just means it was a big popular fandom at the time, I was writing the most popular ship, and these had tropes people were after. I think, at least. I by no means think those are my best works, is all I'm saying.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Of course! I love love love getting comments and so make an effort to always reply to them. If I missed one I promise it was by accident!

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I think that has to be you’ve got a second chance, you could go home. I'm still quite pleased with it. But people really wanted it fixed, so I did write a follow up :)

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? I honestly don't know how to quantify that 😅 Maybe Fire Me Up? The fic as a whole is very soft and sappy.

8. Do you get hate on fics? No, not really. I had one nasty comment a few years back from a fan that clearly hated a character and wanted to make that my (and others') problem, lol, and have had a few iffy comments here and there, but.

9. Do you write smut? Not reallllly. But I used to only fade to black, and have started dabbling in writing sex scenes a bit, so we may get there. We'll see. I didn't think I would, lol.

10. Do you write crossovers? No (that one crackfic notwithstanding, lol), they don't really interest me.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I know of 🤞🏻

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Not that I know of, but what an honour!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? I don't think so, yet? I wrote a fic that went along with others, once, and I have a very neglected draft that I was working on with @ahh-fxck (sorry friend!), but I don't think I have a fic posted that I wrote with someone else...?

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship? You want me to pick between my precious babies?? lol. I honestly really don't know that I have one.

15. What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Pffft, sadly and honestly, so many.

16. What are your writing strengths? Dialogue comes quite easily for me, and I think I tend to do it well. The rest has been a WIP lol, but I think I've been improving!

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Everything else. Ha!! For real though. All the stuff in between dialogue lol. Longer stories. Patience (lack thereof). I'm getting tired because kiddo would not GTFTS, so apologies if I'm becoming less coherent...

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? Thoughts? I mean, I've done it, a tiny bit. I did a bit of researching as well as using online dictionaries etc, and I was lucky to find a native speaker to read things over and give their input before posting.

19. First fandom you wrote for? Good Omens. It honestly happened by accident.

20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written? Oooooh. Possibly Wintersong? I'm quite happy with it. What can I say, I love angst. That one isn't my most favourite kind, but I'm proud of it and love it.

Thank you for the tag @aniron48 💗 Tagging @major-trouble @cicerfics @brothebro @girls-and-honey @holycatsandrabbits and anyone who sees this and wants to tag on 😘

[autumnshighlady]

ugh ialtpwf is so fucking good omg, can't wait to read more!!!! neris is a combination i love, and it's regretful that it isn't approached more, i didn't like the ic either, but man truly hate the ic now, because the way you've described them does hold up realistically. they were so fucking horrible in a way that's like barely addressed, and not to be a bitch but feyre just isn't a equal in the story? she's constantly used the way rhys want to, and it's kind of disgusting. cass and az def seem like misguided supporters of rhys, hopefully they realize their wrongdoings?? maybe kill rhys and lead the court themselves or something?? really want a reader-azriel relationship too tbh, not necessarily a romantic/sexual one, like a mentor-mentee/good friends. feel like reader will be sympathetic towards him and i want them to like be friends??? idm if that isn't the case, though, love your writing the way it is. i think az and nes have a good-ish relationship in acosf so that wld be interesting too,,,, and we all know about azris, cmon hot!. idk. now i'm thinking of eris x nesta x reader x azriel which uh. damn. hot. i want sjm to go thru that same approach you did but i do unfortunately think that she likes the ic the way they are and will probably give eris a true insight into his tragic lifestory, change him and pretend like everything's just fine, with a hint of disdain towards him or something, like lucien lol. can't wait to see eris-nesta-reader interactions, love the interactions they have alr, but together. ugh i can't wait to read them flirting and comforting each other, and the smut lol. anyway i love your fics, can't believe it took me this long to get around to reading it, truly did not dissapoint. sorry about the hate comments you apparently get for no reason? like the fics you write aren't even extreme lmao, sorry about the thing w guys my age. anyway hope you're having a good day!! and agood week! and a good month. byee!!! sorry for this being long hsoikfzjslifdg

i just saw this after a gruelling 13 hour shift and oh my god:.. honey…. my heart is swelling right now at this message PLEASE DONT APOLOGIZE FOR THE LONG MESSAGE I CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH HOW I LOVE LONG MESSAGES LIKE THIS! i love getting asks but most of them are requests which is a bit boring ngl i love talking with you guys and hearing your thoughts and opinions. the fact you read my massive ass fic and took the time to write all this means more to me than i know how to express in the english language.

and yeah feyre doesn’t have much autonomy in my story. the reason for this is while i don’t like her a whole lot, i feel like lots of her actions and behaviour in the books is the consequence of being so influenced by rhys and the bond. therefore i didn’t really want to make her the “villain” so she kinda just… doesn’t do anything. my main beef is w rhys, not her.

you’ll definitely see more of reader and Az as well as nesta and Az because i agree i did like nesta and Az in ACOSF. you’ve given me ideas with adding azriel into the neris/reader mix…. hehe

you’ll see much more of the reader and eris. i have so much planned out for them and Nesta, and it’ll be a rollercoaster! i promise you will love what i’ve got planned <3 this fic has endless possibilities and tbh i don’t think it’ll ever truly be finished.

again, thank you for this message. i cried with happiness when i read it

[xieyaohuan]

Get to know your fic writer prompts, answer however many of these you are inclined to: 22, 35, 39, 63, 64. And I think I can answer 43 for you 😂 but if you have any elaborations… please.

22. Are there certain types of writing you won’t do? (style, pov, genre, tropes, etc)

Not sure I'd rule it out on principle, but I certainly don't write a lot of fluff, and I don't think I'd want to. Don't really write any comedy/humor, either, but it's more lack of talent there.

35. What is one essential thing to remember when writing a villain? 

This is cliché af but if I'm trying to write a villain for fic where I'm trying to make a serious point, it's "they're the protagonist of their own story" and have complex emotional lives and motives for what they're doing. That said, when I write porn, I sometimes enjoy writing characters who are fully aware they are being evil sadistic bitches and simply dgaf because uhm I can relate.

39. Share a snippet from a WIP

“You need to tell your husband,” Maeve is letting the word melt on her tongue, “to back the fuck off and leave us alone.”

“You know I ain’t responsible for the cunt just because he’s decided he wants to play beauty and the fucking beast with me, right?”

Billy still has his own place, but he likes staying over at Vought Tower more than he cares to admit. Homelander is clingy and needy and willing to do just about anything if it’ll get him Butcher’s time and attention. He’d be lying if he claimed he wasn’t enjoying Homelander serving him breakfast in the morning, pouring him tea naked on his knees or making Billy feed him little morsels of French toast dipped in milk, begging to let him suck on his fingers. He is absolutely ridiculous in ways Butcher could have never foreseen, and he's enjoying it more than he should.

“Fascinating,” Maeve says. “I can’t decide which one of you is the beauty and which one is the beast.”

“I’m the beauty. Obviously.” Butcher bends over and starts kissing her, his hands searching for her bra under her shirt.

But Maeve isn't having any of his distractions this time and pushes him away. “Tell him to back the fuck off, I mean it, Butcher.”

“Know what?” Billy says. “I’ll do you one better. You can tell him yourself, and I bet you'll even get yourself an apology.”

Maeve burst our laughing, spitting her coffee half across the table. “An apology? From Homelander? What are you smoking these days?”

This time, it’s Billy’s turn to laugh. “Oh, I promise you you’ll get one. Tell you what, if you don’t, I’ll clean for you naked for a full month. How does that sound?”

Maeve grins. “Deal.”

43. Do you take a sadistic joy in whumping your characters, or are you more the "If you hurt them I would kill everyone and then myself" kind of person?

LOL I mean, what can I say. I love torturing my blorbos and making them beg (and I occasionally also love exploring the psychological aftermath of the ordeal). But I don't really enjoy gore, mutilation, or anything like that. Yes, it's gotta be unbearable for blorbo in the moment and he'd do anything to make it stop, but I want no organ damage or even a character death (I've made one character death exception in a fic, but I don't enjoy seeing my blorbos tortured if I know they're going to fucking die from it; definitely a massive instant turnoff.)

63. Something you hate to see in smut.

A couple of things. First, I guess, is basic mistakes, like, no lube of any kind during anal sex unless you're in ABO verse I guess, which I actually also kinda hate for no particular reason. Basic anatomy, too. Brings out my inner Stannis Baratheon. Then I just have a ton of super specific squicks that'll absolute ruin a fic for me. For smut I otherwise adore, I try to ignore them, but it's hard because they're instant turn-offs. I am hellafucking particular about any tickle fics I read, and it's almost impossible not to ruin one for me at least a little bit lol.

64. Something you love to see in smut.

Lots of things, light dom/sub dynamics, lots of begging and whimpering, big fan of bondage. Loss of control. Las Vegas State of Mind was super hot. Also dubcon and fucked up dynamics. Big humiliation kink. Trying to decide if I should count whump as smut because some of it sure is for me lol.

[thelargefrye]

back with another live reaction of "things that topaz wrote that makes me suffer" with smalls.

Your eyes took in Seonghwa’s rooms and it was like you couldn’t get enough of everything.

yeah everything including deez nuts.......................... i'm not sorry

yn, now why are you surprised that seonghwa isn't ACTUALLY gonna cook. he has magic for a reason, duh.

oof that lover nickname still gets me 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

EMOTIONAL SUPPORT WITCH!!! HAHAHAHAHA I LOVE IT SIR! SIR! SIR PLEASE I CAN HELP YOU TOO!!! all i need is just one chance.

i would happily lay my head in your lap sir. tell me all the stories in the world... oof this is reminding me of dragon!woo and witch!yn and how yn would lay her head in woo's lap while he told stories about dragons.

ALSO IM SO EXCITED TO HEAR THE STORY I NEED TO STOP TYPING AND READ GHKJFDHGFJKD

Seonghwa wasn’t the only legend you knew. Hongjoong was the only wizard that had survived an encounter with Seonghwa. They were both renowned.

oooo yes! both legends in their own rights. love it!!

“Please,” He begged quietly, “I don’t want to see the pity in your eyes.”

STOPPPPPP THAT– NO PITY FOR YOU BABY ONLY LOVE

oh seonghwa trying to save his own captain but failed. kind of makes me wonder if seonghwa followed him because hongjoong killed his captain or if it was because hongjoong was still a thorn in seonghwa's and and the other dark magic users' side.

also yn trying to remember what she was doing that night and how it makes her nervous and sick... oof love those emotions. the "it didn't seem right" just sends a chill down my spine.

A BLOOD MAGIC USER!???!!! I KNOW HOW THAT IS HFDJSKFHKSD ITS– [GUNSHOTS]

“I’m sorry Hwa,” You said, tears streaming down your face. You had never heard of the war from a black magic user’s side before. They had simply been the enemy. 

oooo i love this paragraph. no others than to say that yn is finally changing her thoughts and such... at least that's how i'm seeing her. NO BABY YOU DON'T HATE SEONGHWA!! YOU LO– [SECOND GUNSHOT]

OH NOT DIRECTOR PARK!! BABYGIRL ITS OKAY TO BE CONFUSED JUST NOT THE FORMAL BOSS TITLE.

bruh that was smooth director park... very smooth. of course you can fuck me in your bed 😇

"Let me make love to you in my room, please?" UMMM YES SIR!!

Seonghwa’s eyes lowered to your lips. “Then let me apologize for making your underwear wet when I pushed you against the gate.”

that's hilarious, i love it lol. there's literally too many great lines and too many great things happening right now. the mood is literally so perfect between the two as they talk. they just need to kiss.

him asking to taste her anger is giving flashbacks to their first night together. oh look at that, they kissed.

THE PHANTOM HANDS!!! THE PHANTOM HANDS ARE UNBOTTONING THE BLOUSE FHKSDJFHDSKDJFHSK YES THANK YOU!!! phantom hands pining and holding yn down 🤌 who needs ropes and ties and whatever when you got phantom hands to do the job instead.

o m g the smut scene and the emotions between them. the phantom hands and yn's oral fixation. seonghwa clearly loves her and wants her to admit it, he just knows that she feels the same, but then she tells him she promised never to fall in love again... oh man. oh man i'm gonna need D E T A I L S RIGHT NOW.

also i'm soft because she called him hwa.

shit, she didn't deny hongjoong breaking her heart. bruh i thought it was other way around... wait a second.... i'm getting very right person, wrong time vibes from yn and hongjoong.

NOOOOOO CHOI "SPROUT" JONGHO CALLING YN LIEUTENANT!!!! PLEASE THATS SO CUTE

omg yes seonghwa show hongjoong that this is YOUR school and dream witch 😤 also jongho, honey, love you but MIND YOUR BUSINESS

MAAM WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK IS A TECHNOMANCER!!!

omg this part was soooooo good and jongho gave off like... wonder woman's lasso of truth vibe lol but literally everything about this part is perfect and i loved every second of this. honestly adore this au turned series so much and can't wait for the next part.

Dinner and a Tale

ღPairing: Director! Park Seonghwa x Professor of Dreams! Reader (f) ღGenre: enemies to lovers au, Modern Wizardry School au ღWord Count: 4,274 ღWarnings:  mentions of fighting, war, blood, death, penetrative sex, more sex with magic, nipple play, restraints, finger sucking ღRated: 18+ MDNI, smut with hella plot now ღSummary: Seonghwa finally reveals to you exactly how he got his scar...but that's not the only motive he has. And of course, your old captain, Hongjoong, hadn't gone anywhere either... ღDedication: @mejuii & @downtoamagicalland, my lovely beta's ღPrevious Part| ღAll of the Parts | ღNext Part

Your eyes took in Seonghwa’s rooms and it was like you couldn't get enough of everything. The way the ceiling was that of the night sky. The way his elegant aura exuded from his furniture and decorative features. You had zero doubt that these were Seonghwa’s rooms.

Seonghwa shrugged off his jacket, and with a flick of his hand and a murmur of what you believe is Japanese, phantom hands took it and handed it up onto the clawfoot hanger. "What do you want? There's a few dishes I can do for you."

You turned around and your eyes widened at the phantom hands. "Your demons are going to make dinner?"

Seonghwa puffed out quiet laughter. "Of course. Did you expect me to get my hands dirty?"

You rolled your eyes and sigh. "I suppose you're right."

"Besides, I've got another job, right? I've got to tell you about my past." Seonghwa settled on the settee in his room and patted the cushion. "Come here, lover."

You sat primly on the cushion beside him but Seonghwa was not satisfied with that. He tugged you closer, tucking you under his arm. "There. Much better."

You struggled a bit to put some room in between you but Seonghwa’s grip was iron. "I do NOT have to be this close for you to tell me the story!"

"You're my emotional support witch. Now stop wriggling or I'll get other ideas." You froze and Seonghwa laughed again. "You really are my favorite."

"I'll have chicken," You grumbled.

"Hmmm? What's that, darling?" Seonghwa said in a sing-song voice. His lips puffed hot air onto the crown of your head.

"You asked what I wanted. Wooyoung screwed up my chicken order. So I'll have chicken."

"Wonderful. We'll have roast pheasant then. The grounds keeper flushed some out in the forest the other day. With some wild mushroom bread pudding, we'll be set. Now, lay your head on my lap. I can focus on my words easier with you like that."

How he went from host of a dinner party speaking of food and pairings and then suddenly to convincing you to let him pet you while he spoke, was beyond you, but it happened nonetheless. It was clear Seonghwa had a story to tell, or there wouldn't be a legend made up about him.

"This food better be good because the story portion of this promise slash apology is sorely lacking."

"Oh don't worry! You'll recognize some characters."

Seonghwa wasn't the only legend you knew. Hongjoong was the only wizard that had survived an encounter with Seonghwa. They were both renowned.

"The first battle I stumbled into was horrifying. I heard screaming and yelling and pain and it took everything in me not to shout and run away myself. But I was firm in my belief that we deserved equal rights. So, I pushed on. Eventually I was numb from all the death around me. I was killing people with my demons and it made me feel empty inside. It came to a point where I didn’t even feel like I was living.”

You attempted to push upwards to look at Seonghwa but he firmly held you down, fingers carding through your hair. “Please,” He begged quietly, “I don’t want to see the pity in your eyes.”

“Seonghwa…” You sighed but let him keep you on his lap.

“There was one prick of hot anger within me, however, and that was the annoying White Magic User Captain that kept eluding me. He was sneaky; always in and out of his missions. I could never catch him and therefore never kill him. My higher ups knew they could count on sending me to battle and killing whoever needed to be killed, be it one person or many. But this was the one thorn in our side that could not be pulled.”

You couldn't help but feel stiff in your spot now. You knew how successful Hongjoong had been during that campaign. You had helped him strategize and plan and was the one he fell into bed with after those successful missions. You couldn't help but somehow feel like you were a part of Seonghwa’s story, inadvertently. 

“Out of sheer desperation, I left an innocent bunny demon in the tent of my Captain, knowing she was going to be a target. She had pulled off a victorious maneuver on our part and had wiped out a battalion of white magic users. We celebrated that night but I knew the other side would get their revenge. My demon was able to catch Hongjoong as he snuck into my drunk Captain’s but I was not able to save her. I barely followed him into the surrounding forest, until he suddenly stopped.”

Your heart was racing along with this story. What night had this been? Had you been dreaming, performing missions, while Hongjoong and Seonghwa fought? It almost made you sick to your stomach. It didn’t seem right.

“He said to me ‘Finally, I get to kill the Reaper’ and just like that he slashed out at me. It was a fight, and I didn't really wanna admit it, but he was my equal in battle. He had the same fervor and boldness. He dodged all my demons, and still had the energy to slash me down when my own energy was depleted. I should have died that night. Luckily, they found my demon rabbit in my dead Captain’s tent and followed it back to me. A blood magic user saved my life. I owed him an incredible debt."

"I'm sorry Hwa," You said, tears streaming down your face. You had never heard of the war from a black magic user's side before. They had simply been the enemy. 

Seonghwa patted your shoulder and allowed you to sit up. "Are those tears for me, my little white magic user?" Seonghwa smiled, putting a fingertip to your cheekbone and catching a tear as it ran down your face. He lifted his finger to his lips and sucked. "Your sadness tastes lovely, if you're wondering."

You shook your head. Seonghwa never missed an opportunity to flirt. "Can we eat now?"

"Of course. It's just finishing up." Seonghwa stood up and offered his arm to you. You didn't remember the last time, if any, someone escorted you to your table. You took it, but the realization dawned on you: you really didn't hate Seonghwa anymore. And that could only mean…

You sat at the table with a rather stunned expression. There was no way. You promised yourself you wouldn’t do this again. Your internal spiral began as the phantom hands began to serve the dishes.

The pheasant roast and wild mushroom pudding was to die for, you had to admit. Seonghwa ate with delicate bites, while you who were starving, ate like a starved dog. Seonghwa laughed at your enthusiasm and you couldn't help but feel a tidbit embarrassed.

When you both finished eating, you dabbed your lips with a handkerchief. "Thank you Director Park. That was extremely enjoyable."

Seognhwa sighed. "Now what have I done to earn Director Park?"

"Nothing," You sighed. What the hell were you doing? Seonghwa didn't deserve this, as confused and scared as you were. 

Seonghwa moved on, however, as you internally fought with yourself. He put out his hand, as if asking for yours to bow over. You gave it to him, muscle memory from pleasantries overriding instinct and reason. "It was my pleasure, Mistress Dreams."

You should have realized when Seonghwa was playing along with your distancing, that something was wrong. But it was too late. After Seonghwa bent over your hand, gripping it softly, kissed your palm and then yanked you over the dinner table until your hips hit the edge of the table. 

"Can I fuck you in a bed tonight?" He whispered into the shell of your ear.

"Seonghwa!" You admonished him, pulling back but alas, he wouldn't let go of your hand.

"Let me make love to you in my room, please?" His eyebrows furrowed in a plea. It seemed like the revealing of his past had made him more vulnerable than he usually allowed himself to be. "I've wanted it since you started here. I've been tortured with dreams of it. Pushing you on to my bed, sinking into you, making you cry out my name, and then waking up with you."

You tried to wrestle your hand from him again but he wouldn't let you go. "Director Park, let go of me."

Seonghwa laughed under his breath. "You can't pull that on me a third time tonight, lover. I've heard you whine my name too many times. Besides, I don't deserve it. This time."

"Do you think that fucking me in your luxurious bed is going to make up for the fact that you almost tore my throat out today?" You demanded incredulously.

"I could never truly hurt you," Seonghwa admitted, looking up at you from under his brow and then focusing on your hand, curling his finger around your wrist. He yanked you, pulling you over the table and closer to him again. "Let me make love to that sweet body of yours tonight as both an apology and a thank you."

You sent him a look of confusion. "A thank you?"

"For setting aside your differences for black magic users and picking me over him, tonight," Seonghwa pursed his lips to the side, almost cutely.

"You don't have to thank me for that. I told you. That was over a long time ago. And Hongjoong was in the wrong tonight. There's no reason to be suspicious of you. I should know, I have been sleeping with you," You said in a low tone.

Seonghwa's eyes lowered to your lips. "Then let me apologize for making your underwear wet when I pushed you against the gate."

"Seonghwa!" You said his name with a growl.

Seonghwa smirked. "There's my darling little White Magic User."

"Is this your plan? To get me angry?" You demanded.

"Let me taste your anger tonight, lover?" Seonghwa asked and then pushed his lips against yours. His tongue came out slyly, asking for entrance and you let him. He moaned as he ran his tongue on the roof of your mouth and then backed up. "Not on the table. On the bed!"

A brief image of you laying against the table's edge, ass at perfect height, cheek against the dark cherry wood. "Why not?"

Seonghwa chuckled. "Already dumb thinking about me fucking you?"

"Fine!" You shouted at him, stomping over to the only other door in the room. "In the bed. I'm not dumb."

Seonghwa sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. "No, just stupid."

"You know," Your spine is straightened at the insult, "Dinner was great. Thank you for your demon food. I'm going to bed now."

You got about a few strides towards the door to exit when Seonghwa said, "You didn't ask me what you're stupid about."

"I'm stupid for letting you fuck me once I started this job," You responded tonelessly.

"No, darling, no," Seonghwa shook his head, a thoughtful smile curling his lips. "You're stupid for thinking that this was casual."

Your nails dug into your palms as your fingers curled into fists. "The fuck it isn't casual."

Seonghwa took slow strides across the room, hands tucked into his pants side pockets. "You're the one that insisted we forget all about it. You're the one that wanted to sneak around and not let anyone know. You're the one that kept insisting that this was just convenient and didn't mean anything. I never said anything like that."

"And that's how it's going to remain!" You yelled. Then you rubbed an eyebrow aggressively in frustration. "There, is that enough angry foreplay for you? I'll be seething all--"

Seonghwa scooped you in his arms and brought you into his bedroom. It was gorgeous and immaculate but you don't get a chance to do any sight seeing. Seonghwa dumped you onto the mattress, and you landed with an oof. He waved his hands but he's not touching you, no, his phantom hands are unbuttoning your blouse and pulling up your skirt. You slapped at the hands but Seonghwa simply created more, with the purpose of pushing you down onto your back and pining your hands above your head.

"Let me take care of you, lover. I can give you untold pleasure. I can be everything you need. You'll never need anyone else." Seonghwa cooed. He moved to the side of the bed, knocking your knees apart once his phantom hands had pushed your skirt to your hips. 

"Seonghwa--!!!" Your back arched suddenly as two hands pinched your nipples through your silk camisole under your blouse. "Call them off, you asshole!"

"Oh, I've been downgraded to asshole, how wonderful," Seonghwa mused. He removed the glove he had on his right hand. "Shall I take you from behind, like you prefer?" Seonghwa curved his hands behind your knees and pushed your legs upwards until you were bent in half and your knees were above your waist. "Or shall I sink into your wetness like this? Eye to eye."

"Seonghwa, it's not supposed to be like this," You insisted.

“Says you,” Seonghwa drawled, “I prefer this.” 

His eyes took in how disheveled you looked, your nipples cute and perky from his phantom hands playing with you. Another set pulls and tugs at your underwear until your cunt is on view and it’s gleaming with wetness. “Look at how good you are for me. So wet and inviting. It’s almost as if you wanted this just as much as I do.”

There is simply no denying that this situation was beyond turning you on, and in this moment, you feared for your heart. Seonghwa was purring in your ear, so to speak, seducing you like he’s always known how to do, but it’s that tint of heart that keeps leaking out that terrifies you so. “I don’t want this to be more,” You blurted out suddenly.

Seonghwa smiled patiently. “More what?”

“You know exactly what I’m talking about!” You accused him.

Seonghwa quickly licked your ankle, moaning quietly when he tasted your anger. “I want to hear you say it.”

The pair of phantom hands that had pulled your underwear to the side pulled your lower lips open as well. All Seonghwa had to do was pull out his cock and sink into you. Your body was completely open to him…but your heart was not.

“You can play with my body all you want,” You raised your chin stubbornly, “But you’re not getting my heart.”

Seonghwa smiled, close-lipped but satisfied, “So it’s a challenge then, is it?”

That sentence sent a shiver down your spine. “No! No, Seonghwa, that’s not a challenge!”

At last, Seonghwa finally undid the ties to his pants and pulled himself from the confines, heavy cock gently slapping his stomach. You couldn’t help but smack your lips together, well aware of how heavy Seonghwa’s cock could be against your tongue. Seonghwa laughed at your reaction. “You can’t very well have me both ways, lover.”

Your pout didn’t last for long because a phantom hand found your mouth and settled your oral fixation. Two fingers pressed down on your tongue and you sucked them eagerly. Seonghwa then pushed into you, slow and easy, hands holding your legs just under your knees as he filled you. 

“You’re practically bent in half for me,” Seonghwa murmured, eyes hooded while looking down at you. “Taking my cock like it’s made a new home inside of you.” 

You were effectively gagged so there was really nothing to do but take everything Seonghwa was giving you. The phantom hands still pinned your arms above your head and were still playing with your breasts, petting your underboob because your nipples were almost too sensitive now after all that play. The one in your mouth continued to make your moans muffled as Seonghwa bottomed out inside of you. 

“Fuck, every damn time,” Seonghwa cursed, his eyes fluttering to roll into the back of his head. “I swear to god, I cannot get enough of you.”

You murmured around the phantom fingers, unable to focus on one thing. You were being stimulated in so many ways, it really was making you dumb. Still, Seonghwa rambled, sounding a bit pussy drunk if you were being honest.

“I’ll figure you out, my sweet little dream witch,” He groaned, thrusting slowly inside of you, pulling out almost all the way before pushing back in. “I’ll find the crack in your facade and I’ll widen it until you let me in.”

Your moans grew louder and finally the phantom hand in your mouth disappeared. “Don’t Seonghwa!” You begged.

"I'm gonna make you mine, lover," Seonghwa promised. He bit down on his lower lip, taking his sweet time making love to your body.

The phantom hands released your wrists and you immediately used your freedom to drag Seonghwa down to you, hands behind his neck. Seonghwa had to let go of your legs and braced himself with his arms so he wouldn't crush you. "Stop," You begged again.

"You sure you want me to stop fucking you when clearly you're feeling so good?" Seonghwa smiled cheekily. "You look good too. So flushed and messy, just for me."

"Seonghwa," You said his name in warning, "I swore I'd never fall in love again."

For a moment, Seonghwa’s eyes narrowed in anger. You saw his jaw tighten and his upper lip pulled  into a sneer before he smoothed it all out. "Is it because of him?"

You sighed. Like you needed to give Seonghwa a reason to dislike Hongjoong anymore. "Hwa."

His eyes softened at the shortening of his name. "Yes, lover?"

“Let’s come, okay?” You beseeched him, “Can’t we just focus on the now?”

Seonghwa’s arms bent so that his forearms were braced against his bed now. He was so fucking close to your face that there was no avoiding him now. All the phantom hands are gone now. His eyes traveled over your face but you didn't dare break his gaze. “Okay, darling, we can come.”

Seonghwa began to move his hips again, his pelvis grinding into your clit, that you couldn’t help but let out another pitiful cry with the stimulation. Your pussy and clit were so swollen from everything that even the smallest movement gives you pleasure. Seonghwa slanted his mouth over yours, almost as if he wanted to consume all the noises of pleasure you were letting out. His tongue lazily played with yours but it was simply his goal to enhance your pleasure at this point. 

"Come undone for me, lover," Seonghwa rubbed his lips against yours, "Show me how much power I still have over you. Your body is mine; it only listens to me. No one else can make you feel this way. Just me."

"Hhnnnnnn, Seonghwa!" You feel your pleasure build and you want nothing more than to climax and find that blessed release that is sleep after.

"Come on, little dream witch, come before I do, I don't know how much longer I can hold back before--!" Seonghwa let out a garbled yell as your climax hit you and took him with you.

Your body shook and your nerves lit up and you saw fireworks behind your eyelids. You were panting because the orgasm took that much out of you although all you did was lie there and beg and let Seonghwa fuck you. Seonghwa's climax had his back arched and his head thrown back. He was making low groans and you want to bite his neck, it looks so glorious. But you can already hear his teasing "Wanna mark me up, lover? What will the other teachers think, hmmm?" so you halt yourself from doing so.

Once the pleasure was out of the way, you felt awkward with Seonghwa still inside of you. It was a first and you know it was because of Seonghwa's less than subtle hints about his intentions with you. You just thought the headmaster had a damn breeding kink, you didn't think he actually wanted a family… with you?

"I…should go," You said hesitantly.

Seonghwa opened his eyes and stared at you, calculating something in his head.

 “If you stay, I won’t figure out how to kill your captain tomorrow.”

“Seonghwa, please, how many times do I have to beg tonight? You’re not listening to me!”

“Stay the night. Let me have this. And I won’t kill Hongjoong for breaking your heart.”

“Fine. But I’m not happy about it.”

“That’s okay,” Seonghwa kissed the crown of your head, “I love the taste of your anger.”

🪶✨️🪶✨️

"So, is this the announcement where Seonghwa says he's disappointed his students haven't attempted to turn each other into squirrels yet this semester or?" You drawled to Mingi the next morning.

The entire school, students and staff, were to report to the Theatron for an important announcement from the Director.

Mingi laughed beside you. "I think, if he really wants to piss off the General, he might bring up the attempted demon summoning on the first day of school."

You laughed and then sighed. You wished you could smack your old self and tell you that one night stand should remain a one night stand. "I guess we'll--"

Your words were suddenly cut off as you saw someone else from your past at the school you worked at. “CHOI JONGHO?!”

You screamed the name of the dark haired man who you had been in the army with and ran to hug him, stopping only short of doing so, because Jongho was an empath; he could feel your emotions and thoughts through touch. “What are you doing here, Sprout?”

Jongho laughed in embarrassment. “No one has called me that in ages, Lieutenant.”

You couldn't contain the grin on your face. Jongho had been Hongjoong’s aid during the war. Jongho was indispensable with being able to sense a truth or a lie while Hongjoong interrogated prisoners, or, to simply be able to pick up on Hongjoong’s moods or needs, and help him in whatever capacity he could. 

“Guess I’ll stop calling you Sprout when you stop calling me Lieutenant, Jongho. I’m not in the army anymore,” You said bitter-sweetly.

Jongho shook his head, “You’ll always be my Lieutenant to me.”

“Oh Jongho,” You ruffled his hair affectionately, “What are you doing here anyways? Do you always come with Hongjoong when he does his school trips?”

Jongho got somber. “That’s not for me to say,” He said, shaking his head.

You cocked your head in curiosity, “Well, that only makes me wanna know more.”

Jongho smiled tightly. “You’ll find out soon enough.”

Unfortunately for you, Hongjoong and Seonghwa spotted you at the same time as when you and Jongho approached the side of the stage where the faculty would sit while Seonghwa addressed the students, Mingi having been left behind and decided to chat up another professor. Both strode towards you with purpose and then exchanged unamused glances when they realized once again they were in competition for your attention.

“Lieutenant,” Hongjoong nodded formally to you, “I see you caught up with Sprout.”

Jongho made a pained face again. “Not you too, General.”

“I would have thought that Jongho would have moved up in rank by now,” You said, slightly perplexed.

“I have!” Jongho protested. He adjusted the pin over his heart. “I just decided to remain at Hongjoong’s side. There’s still work to be done.”

“What are you up to today, Kim Hongjoong?” You demanded, wanting to know the secret that Jongho was keeping for your Captain.

Seonghwa sent Hongjoong a calculating look. “You’re up to something today?”

“I have an important announcement to make,” Hongjoong revealed.

Seonghwa frowned heavily. “And you didn’t think that it was imperative to tell the Director of the School that you’re about to make this announcement beforehand?”

Hongjoong shook his head, “This should only be said once.”

Seonghwa drew himself up to his full height and authority. “You will tell me right now. This is my school.”

Hongjoong sighed dramatically, rolling his eyes. “I suppose I owe you that.”

Jongho frowned himself, squaring up, and looking like he was about to fight Seonghwa himself. “General, you don’t have to--”

Hongjoong put up a hand, halting Jongho’s protests. “It’s fine, Jongho.” He made direct eye contact with Seonghwa. “The Council has decided that I will be making a permanent residence here. They want me to begin teaching the students combat and strategy.”

Within seconds, Seonghwa had Hongjoong pushed up against a wall, forearm braced against Hongjoong’s windpipe. “You will not be teaching my students how to fight each other!”

Hongjoong let out a choked laugh. “They won’t be fighting each other.”

Before you realized what was happening, your body was in between the two of them. “Gentlemen, please! The students could be seeing this.”

Seonghwa let Hongjoong go, albeit a bit reluctantly. Anger radiated off of him, even you could feel that. “Why was I not informed?”

Hongjoong cleared his throat. “Well, I was going to tell you last night, but a demon at your door advised me you were predisposed.” Hongjoong’s eyes swung to you, “And you didn’t answer your door when I knocked.”

“That’s not important right now,” You deflected, “Why does the council want you to do that?”

Hongjoong breathed in deeply and then let it out. You had seen that look before… It was when he was about to tell you something important. “The Technomancers are coming.” ღPrevious Part| ღAll of the Parts | ღNext Part

Tagging: @hijirikaww @toxicccred @starillusion13 @flurrys-creativity @stardragongalaxy @a-soft-hornytiny @babiestarrcandy

[calehenituse-brainrot]

Coffee Stains

OG!Muscle Daddy Kim Rok Soo x Reader

Everyone genuinely feels like this hostile(?) atmosphere between Team Leader Kim Rok Soo and [Name] [Last Name] is going to last forever.

@calesleftboob as promised, i put muscle daddy krs there lol

i genuinely just want to write smut because of lily. we talked on twt too much about of krs and we strayed away from god's light with every message. so...

@bomiflower , as we have discussed...

WARNING: NSFW CONTENT BELOW. SMUTTTT. also KRS is ooc because i just want to write some action for him.

btw i'm gonna be out the whole day and wont be able to see everyone's messages after this🥲

"You should start on those, you know."

Everyone in the room immediately turned to look at Kim Rok Soo after hearing his voice. They see him walking past your desk as you sat there, sipping your coffee calmly while a stack of papers sitting on your desk.

"Get your nose out of my business, Rok Soo," you replied, not even turning around to face the man, keeping your eyes on the papers in front of you as if someone would snatch a handful of them at any moment.

Kim Rok Soo glanced back at you before continue walking to the break room, most likely going in to make himself some tea so he can enjoy it while working himself.

Everyone quietly went back to their respective work after seeing the two of you continue yours instead of immediately having a banter like usual.

Everyone had always wondered what exactly caused a rift to appear between you and the man, but you never disclosed anything personal to anyone and Kim Rok Soo himself always avoids talking about you in detail.

Kim Rok Soo never showed any hostility to you — it had always been your attitude that will incite some sort of chaos in the office, but never to the point that everyone else will be bothered by it. Everyone is baffled with your attitude towards the man considering you had always been someone kind.

Meanwhile, Kim Rok Soo had always been someone to look out for others, you yourself included despite not being his subordinate, but your attitude perhaps got even more hostile whenever he does.

'Well, she probably hates me,' he thought, heating up some water. 'I still don't know why, though.'

There was a reason why Kim Rok Soo was looking out for you.

You had been one of the people who were close with Lee Soo Hyuk, having been one of the people he saved before being assigned to a different team.

Despite being on a different team, you were always hanging out with the three of them, though you were distant with Kim Rok Soo due to his indifferent nature.

When the two died, you had been there beside him with a tired expression on your face, still wet with tears you had shed when you had been alone.

When he had looked at you that day, you returned his stare for a couple of seconds before looking back to the frames of Lee Soo Hyuk and Choi Jung Soo.

"I'm sorry."

He remembered saying those words to you once everyone had left. You stayed with him until late at night at the office even though you were tired and light-headed.

He was apologizing for returning alone.

You had glanced at him for a moment and clicked your tongue.

"What are you saying sorry? There's nothing to feel sorry for," you mumbled. "Being alive isn't a sin."

Kim Rok Soo remembered those words, storing them in his records along with so many images of you whenever you return injured from a hunt, apologizing to family members during the funerals of your deceased team members, and the way you'd slump on your desk whenever a hunt has gone wrong.

"They won't be happy to hear you say such a thing," you continued, packing up Choi Jung Soo's things. "Lift your chin up and just stay alive to remember them."

"Let's..." You heaved out a sigh. "Let's stay alive for them. To remember them."

Kim Rok Soo remembers your defeated face as you spoke those words. You didn't sound upbeat and positive — why would you? The people you both look up to had died — but instead, you sounded like being alive is the only choice you had now.

Which wasn't exactly wrong.

"You shouldn't forget to live for yourself, you know."

You flinched a bit at his voice, finally hearing him say a full sentence for the first time that day. Closing the box that were full of Choi Jung Soo's things, you smiled at him.

"I won't."

That was perhaps the last proper conversation that the two of you had after the two's deaths.

Lee Soo Hyuk and Choi Jung Soo had been the people that connected you and Kim Rok Soo together, though even when they were still alive, you and Rok Soo weren't close but not like this.

When they died, you strayed further away from him.

'Well, I can't force things,' Kim Rok Soo thought, pouring his tea into a mug he had taken out of a cupboard.

Though he may have seemed like he was brushing this issue like dust, he wasn't.

He was quite... disturbed with the fact that you hated him. It leaves a bitter taste in his mouth every time he thought of it.

Lee Soo Hyuk had introduced you to Kim Rok Soo and asked the two of you to be friendly with each other since the two of you were around the same age.

You were a part of Kim Rok Soo's world when things were slightly better back then despite the two of you being distant with each other at that time. Either way, it didn't change the fact that he had lost so much people from that time and you were perhaps the last one to remain.

Seeing you so easily brush him away made him feel a bit bitter.

Watching you by the sidelines as you began to grow into an amazing individual — not that you weren't amazing before — was something he had choose to do as you no longer allow people from the past to get through you.

"Do you think Team Leader [Name] is single?"

Kim Rok Soo stopped stirring his tea for a moment

"Damn, you too?"

Kim Rok Soo glanced at the two men walking into the break room, both of them looking for food in the fridge as Kim Rok Soo focuses on his mug.

The one who had asked about whether you were single or not let out a laugh. "I mean, she's quite pretty, isn't she?"

Kim Rok Soo went back to stirring his tea. 'That's true.'

Beside being an outstanding individual, you were known for your mature and kind disposition to others — Kim Rok Soo not included — and those qualities of yours made you appear more physically appealing to everyone.

"I didn't know you liked older women."

"You have to try it out, man. They got so much more experience—"

Kim Rok Soo pulled out the spoon he was using and used it to click the rim of his mug several times, making sure the clink was as loud as it can be.

"Since when did the break room become a locker?" he asked out loud without turning his head, licking his spoon, and tasting the sweet tea. "What's with the locker room talk?"

"T-Team Leader—"

Kim Rok Soo turned around with his mug of tea in hand. "Next time, don't share your thoughts out loud. They're disturbing. Have some respect."

The tall man walked out of the break room and when he was about to turn to his desk, he bumped into someone.

"Oh, sorry—"

You stood in front of him, your button-up now drenched with a dark liquid that most likely came from the mug of coffee you were holding in your hand. You looked up at him, the frown on your face as you stared at him made him think you were going to tear him apart.

You turned around and walked away from him and he froze a bit, thinking about what he should do. You were angry at him and while he does not want to face your wrath, he knows he shouldn't just leave you be and not take responsibility.

'She'll probably hate me even more if I did that,' he thought. And then cursed when the realization hit him.

"Shit," he murmured, hurrying over to his desk and placing his mug down.

Everyone eyed the man as he cleaned up his desk as quickly as he could before he followed you down to the hall.

"[Name]," he called for you, seeing you walk hurriedly. "[Name]."

"You've done enough damage, Rok Soo," you gritted out. "Asshole."

For a moment, Kim Rok Soo was so shocked that he could've swore his brain stopped circuiting for a moment. He had known you for years and he had never once heard you cussed someone out with such distaste.

He questioned whether or not this much hatred you have for him was normal. How did he accept such an attitude when he had done nothing wrong to you?

He rushed over to you, grabbing you by the shoulder. "[Name]."

"Let me go, assh—"

You shut up when Kim Rok Soo pushed your shoulder and your back immediately hit the wall. His face was stoic and he looked down at you. "Was that necessary?"

"What?" You questioned. "Calling you an asshole?"

Kim Rok Soo frowned a bit. What had he ever done to you to invite this type of dislike from you? He usually would brush things off easily whenever people would call him names, but he can't stand it when it's from you.

"God, I nearly had a heart attack when I realized he was there, too."

Both you and Kim Rok Soo snapped up, hearing the same voice from the break room from the end of the hall. Kim Rok Soo looks around the hall for a moment and when his eyes landed on the door not far from the two of you, he grabbed your arm.

"What the—"

He opened the door and pulled you into the small room. He shuts the door as quietly as he could while you're frowning at him.

"What the hell? What did you do that for?" You asked, watching as the dark-haired man runs a hand through his hair before he turned to you.

"We're settling this for once and for all," he told you. "What did I do wrong?"

Your frown turned into a look of confusion. You gestured to the coffee stains on your shirt and then spoke with clear confusion, "You made me spill my coffee–?"

"No," he cuts you off. "No, that's not what I'm talking about."

You closed your mouth, now realizing what he was talking about.

"We've known each other for years and I can't recall a time where I've ever done something so horrid to you that would have you hate me this much," he started. "Tell me what I did wrong so I can fix it. I want this hostile atmosphere between us to be over."

You stared at him for a few moments and then shake your head. "You're crazy. Let me out."

"[Name], I'm serious."

You stared at his reddish-brown eyes and his expression. He had always looked stoic, but the aura he was exuding this time was stifling. You looked around the room and hugged yourself, noticing that he had shoved you into a cramped janitor closet.

"Why did you pull me here...?" You complained instead of answering him, leaning back to the wall. "Gosh, was this really needed?"

"Yes," he answered you with no hesitation. "Tell me."

"Can't I change first?"

Kim Rok Soo suppressed the urge to let out a groan. He approached you quickly, considering his long legs and how cramped the closet was. When you're both nearly chest to chest, you looked up at him.

He stared into your [e/c] eyes. "You're not leaving until I get my answer."

The two of you held eye contact for a while and Kim Rok Soo tries to dig into his records to see whether or not has he seen you this close. He could smell the smell of the bitter black coffee that had stained your shirt and the faint smell of jasmine, most likely from your shampoo or soap.

He can feel how warm your body was despite not touching it.

"Fuck." You rubbed your face, averting your eyes first from the intense eye contact. He watched you seem to contemplate something before you lowered your hand and look back at him.

"You want your answer, right?" You asked him. He nodded silently.

"Fuck you, Rok Soo."

You stood on your tiptoes and placed a hand on his chest, leaning forward so your noses touch. Your other hand placed itself on the back of Kim Rok Soo's head and pushed it down so your lips can finally reach his.

You closed your lips as you moved your lips against his slightly chapped ones, tilting your head to the side and pressing your body to his.

You immediately pulled away and let go of him. "There you go, asshole."

Kim Rok Soo's eyes widened as he stared at you, his lips slightly apart. What the fuck?

Your face reddens and you immediately regretted what you had done in the heat of the moment. "Now let me leave."

You walked to the door and when you were about to turn the handle, Kim Rok Soo spoke, "Are you kidding me?"

He turned around to look at you with a disbelieving look on his handsome face. "[Name], are you fucking kidding me?"

"I'm sorry!" You exclaimed, letting go of the door handle. "I-I got too carried away! You can press charges if you want or whatever. I'll take the responsibility—"

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean? How does this answer my question?" He asked you again. "[Name], what the fuck was that?"

You stared at him, face red and [e/c] eyes swirling with bitterness. "I like you, you dumb asshole! Have been for the last few years!"

Kim Rok Soo nearly had a whiplash from how hard he had shaken his head out of shock. "What the fuck? But you hated me."

"Yeah, because you're an unapproachable bastard," you defended yourself. "I can't get close to you because you're literally so distant. I hated you because of all people to like, I somehow chose you."

"That--" Kim Rok Soo stopped talking for a moment and then let out a big sigh.

What the fuck? So you've liked him all this time? Was he blind all this time or did you just cover it up really nicely by hating him? More importantly, what does he feel about this situation?

Oddly enough, he doesn't mind it. It's a good boost for his confidence because he had always thought he was an average Korean man and to be liked by you felt like quite the compliment.

But does he return your feelings?

You who had turned quiet and were only looking at him waited patiently for his next words.

"[Name]," he finally spoke. "Can I try something?"

You blinked, a bit apprehensive. "Try what?"

Kim Rok Soo leaned toward you and you froze. What was he doing?

He raised one hand to cup your jaw and lean down to your face. He glanced at your eyes for a moment and his thumb caressed your face, asking for permission. You gulped and nodded.

Kim Rok Soo gently placed his lips on top of yours, moving them slowly against yours. Despite you tasting like the bitter coffee you had earlier, he does not pull away. Having your lips against his felt good and when he pulled you closer by your waist, he can feel the pounding of your heart and his own.

As corny as it was, Kim Rok Soo could feel it.

Sparks.

He could feel sparks as he brushes his lips against yours. The smell of roses from you was almost intoxicating and your lips were impossibly soft against his. Your body feels so perfect against his and he couldn't help but to hold you close and never let you go, craving the warmth of your body.

You placed your hands on his shoulder before slowly wrapping them around his scarred neck, returning his gentle kiss with your eyes closed. You press yourself against him, tugging at the hair at the base of his neck and then feeling his big hand squeezing your hip.

"Fuck," you murmured against his lips. Kim Rok Soo opened his eyes a bit -- when did he close them? -- to look at you. He can see your closed eyes and flushed face as you kiss him fervently.

When you bite onto his lips, he pulled away but he kept his arm around you to make sure you stay in your place. You opened your eyes, dazed and confused. "Wh-what's wrong?"

"I can't believe you acted that way because you liked me," he murmured, brushing his lips against your cheek and temple. "You could've just told me instead of making me think I did something wrong."

He gave you no chance to reply as he went back to kissing you. He squeezed your hips and then moved them to your back, pulling you closer to him. He traces his tongue along your lips and gently nibbles on your lower lip.

You opened your mouth, letting his tongue probe into your mouth. You let out a strangled moan when the tip of his tongue swirled around yours and Kim Rok Soo held you tighter when your knees nearly gave out from the stimulation.

He pushed you against the wall, causing a broom to fall over. He accidentally stepped on the broom, the wooden handle breaking underneath his weight. "Oh, fuck."

"Fuck that," you told him, pulling him to you again and opening your mouth for him. He kicked away the broken broom and shoved his tongue into you, beginning to explore your mouth using his tongue.

"R-Rok Soo," you whimpered, words slurring as Kim Rok Soo kept on swirling his tongue with yours. You sucked on his tongue gently and heard him let out a groan.

He pulled away from your mouth for a bit, kissing your lips once before going down to your jawline. You gripped at his shoulder, throwing your head back to give him more access.

"H-hah," you huffed as Kim Rok Soo kisses a spot underneath your ear. He placed light kisses here and there before his tongue began to lick up several spots that had you writhing a bit in his arms.

"Rok Soo," you called for him, feeling his tongue swirl on a spot before he placed his lips on it, sucking and nibbling on your skin. "Hahh, fuck."

"Mhm." The man hummed on your skin, hands going up to your ribs. "Can I touch you here?"

"Yes," you whispered. "Yes, please."

You used one hand to start unbuttoning your stained shirt, sighing in relief when Kim Rok Soo helped you to take off the sticky shirt completely.

Your hands went to your back, taking off the clasp of the bra you had on and letting him tug the straps from your shoulders and let the bra fall to the floor. He stared at your naked chest and placed his large hand on the underside of your breast, massaging them gently.

You bit your lip when his coarse fingertips pinched on your nipple, pulling and rolling them to his heart's content.

"I can kiss them, right?" He murmured, lips pressed against your cheek and placing soft kisses every now and then. You nod your head, closing your eyes and letting out a sigh when you feel him grind his bulge against your damp pussy. "P-please do whatever you want."

Kim Rok Soo kissed your jaw lovingly. "I won't disappoint you, Team Leader."

He lowered his lips to your breast, wrapping his lips against your nipple and sucking on them as his other hand is busy massaging your other tit. You run a hand through his hair when you feel his tongue swirling around your nipple before he caught it with his teeth, pulling on them which resulted in you hissing.

He'd move his lips around your areola, kissing and sucking on the soft skin there to leave hickeys that no one would ever see. As he switched to the other breast, your hand went down to his crotch, palming the growing bulge he had.

"F-fuck." He bit onto a spot on your breast, sucking on them before pulling away to look down at you.

"I want you," you murmured, staring at him with lust-filled [e/c] pools, one hand palming him and the other one pulling on his belt. "I want you in my mouth. Can't I do that?"

Kim Rok Soo's face reddens hearing you speak like that. He let out a shaky breath before kissing you again, his hand going down to take off his belt. He pulled down his pants and you tugged on his boxer briefs, pulling them down. You flinched when his cock sprung out, semi-hard but its size already intimidating you.

"Y-you're big," you blurted out, looking down at his erection with wide eyes. You gulped a bit, trying to imagine what it would be like to have him inside of you.

"Not your thing?" Kim Rok Soo asked in a low voice, kissing your jaw and making more hickeys around your neck.

"Bastard," you mumbled, wrapping your fingers around his thick shaft and began pumping them.

"Hahh, shit," he groaned out against your neck, frowning as he suppressed the loud groans that were about to leave his lips. He bit onto your shoulder as your hand began to quicken its pace until he was hard and a bit of pre-cum leaking out of his slit.

You kissed his neck before kneeling down in front of him. Kim Rok Soo looked down at you, topless and covered with hickeys and his saliva. He activated his Records, keeping this image forever ingrained in his mind.

His eyes went from your bruised lips, your neck that had a slight sheen from his saliva and covered with hickeys, your naked chest that was moving up and down, and your fingers around his cock.

You kissed the tip of his cock as he tucked a few strands of your hair behind your ears. Looking up at him, you opened your mouth and wrapped those pretty lips around the mushroom head. Kim Rok Soo lets out a grunt and as much as he wants to throw his head back and close his eyes to enjoy the moment, he couldn't.

He kept his eyes on you as you kept yours on him, recording every second of this moment.

You moved your tongue up and down his slit which had his breath hitch before you swirl your tongue around the head. Kim Rok Soo placed his hand to the back of your head, pushing your head to take more of him.

You let out a moan as you slobber all over him, fucking your throat with his cock. You'd pull back a few times to take a breath and the way Kim Rok Soo would cup your face with his palm and caress your jaw with his thumb had you eager to continue.

He watched as you rub your flushed face against his cock with a hazy smile, his body running hot as he records that image. That alone had him nearly coming and he let out a groan when your hands came up to massage his balls.

He places both hands into the back of your head and moved his hips while also guiding you down on him, fucking your throat slow and deep. His breath labored and he grunts when he could feel your saliva running down to his boxers.

He lets out a snarl as he fights to keep his eyes open and trained on you, his lashes nearly fluttering close when he felt your throat spasming around him in tight, wet heaving gulps. He bit his lips, reminding himself that the two of you were still in the office and were going at it in the janitor's closet.

Tears started appearing in your eyes and running down your cheek. Your hands stopped massaging his balls and instead were gripping at his muscled thighs. When he came, he grinds his hips deeper into your throat, spurting hot fluid down your throat and you swallowed every single drop.

"Ohh, fuck," he cursed as he feels you swallow, throat moving around his cock.

When he finally lets you go and you pulled away from his cock, you wiped your mouth that was slobbering with saliva and some of his cum. You looked up at him, watching him take deep breaths to control his breathing.

"S-shit," he cursed again, gathering himself to try and not jump on you immediately. "Come and give me a kiss, pretty."

Your face reddens and your eyes twinkle at the nickname. You do as he said, kissing him with a smile on your face. When you pulled away, his hand dug into his back pocket and took out a handkerchief.

You looked at his face as he wiped the tears and saliva away from your face, his hand touching your jaw as he does so.

"Did I do good?" You asked and Kim Rok Soo frowned, "Why are you asking? Of course, you did. I'd like to pay you back for it."

You gave him a smile, unbuttoning your pants and leaning to the wall. You let them fall to the floor along with your underwear before stepping out of them, watching Kim Rok Soo kneeling down and looking up at you.

"Put your leg here, baby," he said, moving your left leg to dangle over his shoulder.

You let out the sweetest sigh Kim Rok Soo had ever heard when he kisses your leaking pussy. He hums, running a thick finger through your sopping wet folds. You covered your own mouth and Kim Rok Soo thought to himself that it was a damn shame the two of you weren't in his apartment right now where he could make you scream and turn you into a mess.

He kissed your thigh before pushing his face against your pussy, tongue pressing against your clit and finger slipping into your cunt. You let out a yelp and could feel the twitch of his lips moving upwards before he began to flick his tongue against your clit.

"O-oh, Rok Soo," you murmured warmly, running a hand through his hair as he looks up at you, Record working as he memorized your expression. "Oh, please, please, please..."

Kim Rok Soo opened his mouth, gliding his tongue along your folds before sucking your clit. You gripped at his hair, letting out a quiet moan when he nibbled on your clit and pulled on it.

"R-Rok Soo, I'm gonna cum," you mewled, feeling another digit of his finger entering you before the began to pump them in and out -- his other hand gripping at your hip.

He laps at your arousal, lips moving against your folds as he ate you out like a starved animal. His tongue was exploring your cunt, fervently savoring the taste of you as he pumps his fingers in and out to push out more of your slick, groaning in approval when you began to squirm underneath his grip.

When he slid his tongue down your slit and wrapped his lips around your cunt, your knees nearly gave up on you. "Rok Soo, baby, ohh..."

You feel his tongue swirling around your hole and nearly missed the heavy breaths he was letting out as he does so. You arched your back as you lean to the wall while Kim Rok Soo continued his onslaught on your cunt. His skin felt hot against yours and with every movement of his tongue against your cunt, you could feel yourself getting closer to your orgasm.

You nearly let out a yelp when he pushes his tongue inside of you, the wet muscle lapping at your insides. Your legs were trembling and when Kim Rok Soo's thumb began to circle your clit, you eventually tip over the edge and came, letting out a low whine as your body twitch underneath his hold.

He lapped up your cum, letting out a low growl as he continued licking and sucking on your cunt as you squirmed. "R-Rok Soo, stop..."

He wrapped his lips against your clit and licked up the length of your slit before pulling away from you, a string of your cum connecting his lips and your cunt. He licked his lips, staring up at you who were trying to breathe properly. He kissed your thigh, rubbing your shaky thigh as you try to gather your bearings.

"You okay?" He asked you.

You nodded, gulping. "Y-yes."

He removed your leg from his shoulder, standing up to his full height. He buried his face to your neck, placing butterfly kisses there. You leaned to him, nuzzling your cheek to his jaw and humming as he lift your leg again, pushing his erect cock against your cunt.

"You smell nice," Kim Roo Soo commented, letting your cunt coat his cock with your slick.

You wrapped a hand around his shoulders, humming. "I smell like sex and sweat, Rok Soo."

"Mhm, exactly why I said that." He kissed your jaw. He pulled away from tou before pushing his cock into you.

You gasped, eyes rolling into the back of your head as his thick cock filled you up. His broad chest was pressed against your tits as he pushed into you. You could feel him up to your stomach and the stretch was borderline painful, his tip continuously pressing to your G-spot.

"Y-you're 's big," you slurred, mewling when Kim Rok Soo began to move his hips.

"Ssh, don't let the others hear you," he murmured, picking you up by your thighs and wrapping them around his waist. You placed your hand on his shoulders, throwing your head back and letting him to kiss your neck.

He grabs you by your ass, guiding you to move on his cock as he kiss and suck on your neck. You can feel every bulging vein he had on his cock and the slight curve on his dick made it much more pleasurable.

"R-Rok Soo—!" You moaned out and immediately swallowed your words when he slammed you to the wall, one hand leaving your ass to cover your mouth.

"Ssh," he shushes you, now his hips moving to fuck his cock into your cunt. "They'll hear you."

"Let's get this done quick," he added, pressing his hand to your mouth more before he moved his hips quickly, pumping his cock in and out of you in a pace that had you squirming and writhing, pain and pleasure mixed into something that has you curling your toes and tears running down your cheeks, wetting his hand.

"R-Rok Soo—" You slurred underneath his palm, sniffling as he fucks your pussy, the sound of skin meeting skin everytime his crotch meet yours only driving you to the edge, more slick dripping out of you and wetting his boxer briefs.

"F-fuck—" Kim Rok Soo nearly let out a whine when your walls throbs around him, sucking him in the best they could despite being so slippery due to your previous endeavours. "You're so warm, [Name], so good for me."

"You like to be filled with my cock, right?" He continued, hand still covering your mouth. You feel your abdomen began to contract, something pooling to the bottom of your stomach, ready to burst.

"You like it when I fuck you like this, yeah?" He murmured, voice husky and breathy, his cock pumping in and out of your slippery hole. "Maybe I should just let you scream for me here. Let those guys know I'm fucking you inside some old closet. What do you think, huh?"

You shook your head, moans muffled underneath his palm. Your legs were trembling and when you came, your whole body limps on top of Kim Rok Soo.

"Done already?" He questioned you, hips still moving and you whine, the overstimulation stinging and your abdomen quickly contract again. "One more time for me, baby."

Despite still being muffled, you still spoke. "R-Rok Soo, please, I'm going to—"

You let out a gasp when Kim Rok Soo slammed his hips to you as hard as he could and you immediately came again, squirting a bit when you did so..

"Come on, come on," he murmured, quickening his pace. "Give me more, [Name]."

"Rok Soo—!" You mewled, helpless as he try to chase his own release.

"Fuck, I'm close, [Name]," he grunted, pressing himself closer to you, a ring of white now gathering at the base of his cock and some of your fluids running down his balls. He removed his hand and placed them back on your ass, guiding you to his cock as deep as he could. "Can — hahhh, shit, shit — can I come in you?"

You squeezed your eyes shut, nodding your head. Kim Rok Soo slapped your ass and you gasped at the sting. "Use your words, [Name]. Can I come in you?"

"P-please," You moaned, sniffling as you buried your nails into his shoulders. "Please come in me."

Kim Rok Soo groaned at your words. "Give me a kiss, pretty."

You pressed your lips to his, dazed and delirious. Kim Rok Soo quickens his pace as he shared a heated kiss with you, swallowing your moans and whines as you began to twitch and tremble.

"Mhmm, ahh, Rok Soo," you moaned against his lips. "I'm coming, please, please—"

"With me, [Name]," he whispered. "Come with me. You can do it."

You curled your toes when you felt the pressure on your abdomen began to build up higher and higher. When you finally came, you felt Kim Rok Soo bursting into you.

"Ahh, hahh," he huffed, slowing his pace before he completely stop.

You fell limp within his hold, head on his broad shoulder. "R-Rok Soo..."

"Sshhh," he murmured, pulling out of you slowly and letting his cock out, covered with both of your cum.

Your cunt began to leak out your mixed fluids and dripped down to the floor. "Fuck," you murmured. "I don't think I can walk."

Kim Rok Soo gulped and let out a quiet chuckle. "Fuck."

[rosella-writes]

My Fics for the Arlathan 2022 Exchange

I received many gifts this year in the @arlathanxchange, and somehow managed to write even more! I had a blast waiting for reveals and kept adding to the pile. Here's what I made (all are one-shots):

you are the angel that I couldn't kill, for @wickedwitchofthewilds

Pairing: Andarateia Cantori x Viago de Riva

Rating: Explicit

Tags/Warnings: bondage, rape roleplay, knifeplay, pegging, femdom, forced orgasm — all in the context of a fully consensual established relationship based on respect and love

Summary: “You were such a tricky little mark,” she coos, turning one corner of her mouth up in a promising smirk. “Just out of reach all evening, flirting with the danger that tailed you. You should have poisoned the wine.”

it's enough to be better, for @melisusthewee

Pairing: Quinn Trevelyan x Solas

Rating: Explicit

Tags/Warnings: top!Trev, bottom!Solas, established relationship fluff, teasing and banter, background poly with Cassandra, emotional constipation, confession of feelings in Elvhen

Summary: Quinn Trevelyan is bored, and Solas isn't paying attention to him. Something must be done.

memory is the poison in our veins, for @melisusthewee

Pairing: Hawthorne x Quinn Trevelyan, Hawthorne & Hygge, Hawthorne & Fen'Harel

Rating: Teen

Tags/Warnings: blood magic to access dreams, mild body horror and trippy Fade sequences, derealisation/depersonalisation, past Solas x Quinn

Summary: Hawthorne never asked for any of this. He's just a simple apostate elf with no clan and no name, making his way in the world as best he can. But things get complicated when one tangles fates with the former Inquisitor and Herald of Andraste.

oily marks appear on walls (where pleasure moments hung before), for @dreadfutures

Pairing: Solas x Felassan

Rating: Mature

Tags/Warnings: angst, non-explicit sexual themes, Arlathan

Summary: Solas loved Felassan in the gaps. They hardly had time—in between covert meetings and strikes in the dark—for each other. But for two who were so entangled, in both day-to-day and in dreams, it was difficult not to want. And so they gave in.

The Needle and the Shield, for @settiai, @razzaroo, and @thedastrash

Pairing: Alistair x Zevran Arainai

Rating: Explicit

Tags/Warnings: needles (tattoo needles), arousal from pain, mild painplay, first time bj, virgin Alistair

Summary: Alistair takes Zevran up on his offer to give him a tattoo—Zevran learns that Alistair likes pain.

Fill My Cup, for @bogunicorn and @darethshirl

Pairing: Virelan Lavellan x Solas

Rating: Explicit

Tags/Warnings: established relationship, 69 (nice), teasing and banter, fisting of the vaginal variety, hand kink if you squint

Summary: Virelan wants to come. Solas wants to teach her something new.

Amatus, Kadan, Vhenan, for @noire-pandora, @enigmalea, and @thefoxinboots

Pairing: Dorian Pavus x Solas x The Iron Bull

Rating: Explicit

Tags/Warnings: misunderstandings/arguments and resolution thereof, sex as therapy, sex as apology, top/dom!Dorian, bottom!Solas, bottom!Bull, bottoming from the top, dom/sub elements, semi-public sex

Summary: Solas shoots him another look over his shoulder. His eyes are bright under furrowed brows. “Do not assume I cannot see this ploy for what it is. Perhaps I want to remain upset with Dorian. Did you consider that, oh benevolent peacekeeper?” Iron Bull shrugs. “Or you could fuck about it and stay mad. Makes no difference to me.”

And there you have it! A veritable mountain of smut with one (1) piece of T-rated world-exploration lol. These were so fun to write and have consumed my focus for the last few months, so it's exciting to get to share them at last.

[lululawrence]

Hellooo you may have answered this before so apologies but I just wondered, a lot of your fics are tagged as no smut, is that just something you don’t really like to write? You’re a talented writer with great premises and great recs, keep up the good work :)

hey! no worries! i haven't actually talked about this on here i don't think since i made the decision to stop writing smut several years ago now, and if i can't remember i certainly don't expect anyone else to lol and thank you so so much for your kind words! it means a lot when i feel like i'm struggling a lot with finding the time to write what i want to :D

my answer got very long, as per usual. this wordy bitch isn't likely ever gonna change. so i'm gonna go ahead and put this under a cut.

so. there were a lot of reasons why i decided to stop writing smut. i had been considering it for awhile because smut was something i only started writing for a few reasons in the first place. the first reason was i wanted to see if i could do it. once i knew i could, i wanted to see if i could do better with it. the second reason, though, was that at the time, i felt that the only way i could really get readers was if i wrote smut.

there were certain fic reccers who were kind of almost like the fic gatekeepers for a lot of readers, and if they didn't acknowledge a fic, it was like it didn't exist in some ways. or that was how it felt as a new writer in the fandom. in order to get on their radar, you had to write smut and you had to write smut that highlighted certain things they liked. i wanted people to know my fics existed, and i thought that was likely one of the only ways to do it. since it was a challenge as well as a hoop it seemed like i had to jump through, i did it.

as time went on and i learned more about myself, i realized i just did not enjoy writing it at all. it made me incredibly anxious to think about the smut scenes. writing was meant to be fun! if smut was making it so it wasn't fun for me anymore, then that wasn't cool and something clearly needed to change.

i hadn't made the decision to do so quite yet, but i had a few conversations with some friends the months after that. there were fics that i thought really beautifully and subtly showed the growth of intimacy between the main characters, but others made comments that nothing happened between them. these nods to the increased trust and vulnerability between the characters wasn't seen by everyone, and i actually had a few arguments where i had to explain that sex doesn't have to be the pinnacle. sex isn't always what is seen as the ultimate moment of vulnerability and intimacy that some people see it to be. but also, i wholeheartedly believe that scenes can be searingly sexy and hot and have absolutely no removal of clothing or sexual content.

once again finding a challenge, i was about to make the cross over to not writing smut anymore, but then the incredible @greenfeelings got a stupidly entitled anon that pissed me off. see, shai had just written this AMAZING fic, it was long and intricate and emotionally deep, and it just so happened to have one sex scene in the entire 85k i think it was, and that scene mostly faded to black iirc. this anon came and tore her down for not writing more smut. they essentially said she had promised it to them by referencing smut through the fic but not actually WRITING it. another came then and basically said the smut she did include was not to their liking.

and that was it. if a writer i look up to as much as i do shai could gift the fandom with her incredible skill and have people shitting on her art in that way, all because the smut wasn't to their specifications, then why the hell was i even trying? why was i stressing myself out and putting myself through the anxiety of it all? to pander to people who behaved like that?

so no more. i fulfilled the fests i had signed up for that required smut, and then haven't included it in my fics since. i decided if people were just reading fics for smut, they were likely disappointed with what they found in mine anyway, and really i don't actually care anymore if my fic gets a lot of hits. i hope those who do take a chance and read them enjoy them. i hope my friends who have the time to read them like them too. but ultimately i LOVE my fics, and that's my new measure for success. i write my fics for ME. and sometimes as gifts to friends. hehe

it's been a huge relief for me, but also i have had a LOT of fun with the challenge of still showing that sexual tension and growth of intimacy without showing any smut. it is my greatest goal to write fics that show growth in their bond and how they respond to each other, and also make a fic really sexy, without actually having sex in it. fests like @wankersday are so much fun, trying to figure out ways to fulfill the prompt while also not actually showing anything. it's great!

so yeah. some of it is my pettiness. some of it was that i didn't enjoy writing it and it actually did cause anxiety at times. and some of it was because while writing smut was a challenge, i PREFER the challenge of writing a fic WITHOUT it.

so yeah! that's why!

[trulyhopelessromantic]

Fanfic Writer 20 Questions!

tagged by @lumiereandcogsworth I apologize in advance for what little is uncovered here today XD

Left your answers above so ppl can visit your stuff ;)

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

0 no one's ever introduced me to ao3. In fact it took me 2.5 tries to even type the name correctly XD

2. what’s your total ao3 word count?

0. I publish to tumblr ( https://trulyhopelessromantic.tumblr.com/fanfics ), Patreon www.patreon.com/trulyhopelessromantic and one completed fic on fanfiction.net The Haunted Manor which also has its own tumblr @thehauntedmanor

3. how many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

Honestly I'm not sure without going back through my various places that I post but let's just guess like...20 fandoms? I mostly have done one-shots, tbh

4. what are your top five fics by kudos?

Hard to say coz of this 'kudos' being from ao3 I imagine? Um for sure The Haunted Manor has the best out of anything I've ever written and published and I'm so proud of it! It's a sort of fanfiction but I consider it a retelling so it's slightly an AU slightly an original and slightly both lol

5. do you respond to comments? why or why not?

ALWAYS IF POSSIBLE. I so rarely get comments that I jump immediately to life again at a comment! Please, readers, comment like the old days when I was first on the internet XD

6. what’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

oh dang uh I don't even know. I'd have to go back through my one-shots I think but my Frankenstein one comes to mind... Victor -a Frankenstein (ballet) inspired work

7. do you write crossovers?

I have in the past, yes ^_^ Mostly when I did 'Fanfic Fridays' way back like almost 10 yrs ago haha

8. have you ever received hate on a fic?

One time someone thought I was being passive aggressive in asking for reviews for The Haunted Manor so she told me so in her comment before tearing apart one of my chapters. Still think of that. I've also had a few ppl in recent years say some comments that I thought were uncalled for and very... unfounded. From friends too. One told me "I'm so glad you're going back and editing your first book A Promise Kept because it wasn't actually very good (or some bullshit like that) and I was so taken aback because 1) she'd always praised the book 2) she's never published anything because she rarely finishes anything (and if she has she hasn't shared it) 3) my novel was not 'trash' or whatever word she used. But I digress because that was an original story/novel and this is about fanfiction haha oops!

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?

Not usually but I've made 3 attempts at it. One I decided to tastefully just go for that nsfw content with Daughter of Death on Patreon while the other two times were (well...) probably not really considered smut really because I was too shy to put anything too out of my comfort zone at the time. Those are tagged in my tumblr fic page with indications in advance haha

10. have you ever had a fic stolen?

I have run into a time when fanfiction.net was replicated on some other site and I had to get my fic shut down off of there. Tumblr and some random post about the replicas gave me the heads up. This site isn't just a hellsite haha

11. have you ever had a fic translated?

not to my knowledge so if so then number 10 applies haha

12. have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes with my good friend Vicky @vampiratesgrl through our blog @fantasydrabble and once a three way split through that same blog! I write daily with a friend of mine in our own RP style fics

13. what’s your all-time favorite ship?

impossible to answer because I am after all a truly hopeless romantic. But, I'm pretty proud of my couples in The Haunted Manor! They all warm my heart dearly!

14. whats a wip that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

my other fanfic on fanfiction.net lol I started it soooo long ago in Jr High I believe and though I recall what happens I don't know that I'm interested to write it out for the world lol especially coz I'd have to re-read info again on Digimon which it is based in ;)

15. what are your writing strengths?

emotion, dialogue and well I dunno because it's been so long since anyone has told me specific comments. But for The Manor people enjoyed how I took something existing and made my own story while still making it familiar and the changes to extend scenes were (for most people) described as better than the original film did it. And that makes me feel good! ^_^

16. what are your writing weaknesses?

setting. I am so vague often because it's vague in my own head. My stories are set in relationships and emotions and less in a solid physical space when I think them up. I need to work on that!

17. what are your thoughts on writing dialogue in another language?

I like it but for goodness sakes if you do it and I have to go and translate everything because I have no background or knowledge or context for what might be being said then I'm annoyed! So I try to use it sparcely and when I do it's either easily figured out or something like that

18. what was the first fandom you ever wrote for?

online? Erm I guess that Digimon fanfic. But before that there was some imagined stuff for a bunch of things that I suddenly cannot recall at this time XD

19. what’s your favorite fic you’ve ever written?

Gots to be The Haunted Manor because it's close to my heart with what the story contains, it's longer than my actual first novel haha, I have the most feedback on it and my one-shots are often requested by people and I just type it out and don't easily recall them to mind later on without some stimulus reminding me that I wanna go back and reread it haha

20. who do you tag?

@shakespearevillain if you want to and any writers who have read to this line hahaha

Fanfic Writer 20 Questions!

tagged by @misscrazyfangirl321 thank u :))

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

48 in total! 46 for batb lol

2. what’s your total ao3 word count?

115,935 !!!

3. how many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

okay i mean, technically i have three on ao3. i wrote ONE fic for law & order svu and it’s an entirely irrelevant fic now because what i wrote about HAPPENED. but people still read it every now and then so i just leave it up. and i also wrote an epilogue fic for the netflix film juanita. i’m not in that fandom cuz that fandom doesn’t really exist but i watched the movie for a film class and i literally turned that fic in as my project for it (yes i got 100% yes go read the fic). so pretty much all i write for is beauty and the beast 2017, my beloved :)

4. what are your top five fics by kudos?

1. his perfect reality

2. after the kiss

3. sunrise, anew

4. sleepless nights

5. do me the honor

all batb 2017, and i think those are also my most read fics just in different order, so this checks out!

5. do you respond to comments? why or why not?

i do! i always try and say thanks and show my appreciation for my readers cuz yeah i’m writing for me but gosh we love the feedback, lads

6. what’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

fading memories is your dream, for SURE. 99% of my fics end in a very happy and fluffy way. the only ones that end angsty are my young adam fics, and that one is the Big Boy Prequal Fic that ends in a perfectly tragic way that should lead you right to the beginning of batb 2017. it’s all angst, man.

7. do you write crossovers?

no but i’m not against them! i think they can be fun :) emily and i have an ongoing crossover universe but we’ve never written any fics it just exists through our insane texts and incorrect quotes sjdksj

8. have you ever received hate on a fic?

thankfully, no! the batb readers are all very kind and sweet!! (or at least the ones who read my fics lol)

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?

nope nope the furthest i’ll go is making out and even then i’m not graphic or detailed at all

10. have you ever had a fic stolen?

no not that i’m aware of 👀 is someone out there stealing my domestic fluff???

11. have you ever had a fic translated?

again not that i’m aware of but i would be so honored

12. have you ever co-written a fic before?

well no not besides me and @ilikebigassbuttsandicannotlie’s crossover universe but it’s not exactly in fic form. and i collab’d with @drawnby27emilys but i did the writing and she did the illustrating, we stuck to our strong suits, lol.

13. what’s your all-time favorite ship?

adam and belle from beauty and the beast 2017 are quite nearly the only ship i have paid any attention to in the last 4 years!!

14. whats a wip that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

hmmm. maybe i’m just optimistic but i feel like i’ll get to everything eventually. there’s one really long fic that i’ve written so many bits and pieces of but never just sat down and written it. mostly for technical plot reasons that i just don’t spend enough time trying to work out. OH! there’s that fic idea i got from that dream i had where it was modern au and adam had a little sister. SHOOT bro i do wanna write that. i wrote so much dialogue for it that next day but the wip itself is hardly anything :(

15. what are your writing strengths?

setting the scene and just painting the picture really nicely so you can see everything clearly. little details that make you feel like you’re watching it. i don’t know, character blocking? i think about what they’re doing a lot, with their hands or where they’re looking or whatever. also i think i’m pretty good at dialogue but that’s just cuz adam and belle are in my head all day long so i know their voices very well

16. what are your writing weaknesses?

conflict for sure. i’m too much of a fluffy writer!! i don’t like writing arguments or them getting mad at each other unless it’s stupid domestic stuff then it’s funny. i’m really good at writing the reconciling/making up lol but i seriously need to work on creating conflict. i just get too attached and i don’t like to see them fight even though i know everyone does and it’s a part of building the relationship >:( and even if it’s not adam and belle i just need to be better at writing it in general, for my oc’s and such. do it for the kids, lyd!

17. what are your thoughts on writing dialogue in another language?

it’s very cool in the correct context!! i can’t do it really but hell yeah!! obviously with batb being in france i sometimes use french terms of endearment, mostly for lumiere lmao, but that’s about all i’m capable of! in my recent kiddos fic i tried out some familial titles like pépère for grandpa maurice and tata & oncle for auntie plumette and uncle lumiere <3 that was fun!

18. what was the first fandom you ever wrote for?

bbc sherlock babeyyyy. i used to hand-write sherlock childhood fic in a journal??? i didn’t even know what fic was i just liked giving him a backstory haha. i did the same for loki but in my phone notes app. i’m nothing in not a sucker for the sad and innocent childhood backstories of very sad men apparently!

19. what’s your favorite fic you’ve ever written?

oh man this is so hard. i’m proud of a lot of my work! majesty of a different breed comes to mind honestly. it’s one of my longer ones and i just truly love how it turned out. i think my descriptors are so good and i capture adam and belle’s dynamic as a newly married couple really well, i think. and i give them a dog! how can you not have a good time reading that fic!

honorable mentions to easy to remember, harder to move on — my maurice memories fic that i also really love. AND fading memories is your dream! my longest work and gosh, i really do love the tragic backstories bro!!! big proud of both of those too :)

(and this one cuz it’s too soft and i’ll never not love seeing my otp be the sweetest parents ever)

20. who do you tag?

if you’re a writer and you wanna do this you can totally say i tagged you!! but i’ll tag some writers off the top of my head! @leighswhannell @ilikebigassbuttsandicannotlie @lumiereswig @myfellowcandlesticks @thesadchicken @sweetfayetanner @tinydooms @trulyhopelessromantic @ceasarslegion