#this is why I can't watch deadpool and wolverine. I'm scared that guy's voice is gonna activate my kill switch and I'll get kicked out of

[thevegetablewhichnoonedaresname]

"no," I say, gritting my teeth. "I won't kill anyone. especially not for you. you have no control over me anymore." he chuckles, low and sinister. "oh, but that's where you're wrong. see, you can fight it all you want, but that hole in your memories? that was when we implanted the trigger phrase. you're a sleeper agent. you will kill, you'll do anything we want, and there's nothing you can do to fight it." my breath quickens. I desperately don't want it to be true, but deep down I know it is. he opens his mouth to chant the fateful words, and I'm powerless to stop the darkness overtaking the edges of my vision as I hear, "Hi, I'm Ryan Reynolds, here with Mint Mobile. Are you tired of big wireless overcharging you?"