#this is tooooooo pure

[screampied]

need gojo shoving my mouth down on his cock till my eyes roll back n im struggling for air only for him to quickly pull me off n call me pathetic for not being able to take it for any longer

☆ : gojo x fem! reader

⤷ tags: oral, spit, praise, hair pulling, dirty talk, big dick gojo </3

an. me tooooooo.

“…f-fuck, take it all the way down,” he’d grumble, a hand gently yet roughly gripped on the top of your head. his touch was quite gentle. your jaw was open as he sunk himself right into your tight throat.

his warmth, it was purely appetizing—you swirled your tongue gingerly against his fat tip, tasting the sweetened pre-cum that coated there. “good girl, no teeth. jus’ just like that.”

as your knees dug into the thick wools of the carpet, you felt your own saliva trickle out of your mouth, past your chin and into your chest.

“god, mouth of yours is always so m-messy,” he hisses, taking a second to bite his lip. “how’s it taste, baby? the meal okay?”

you eagerly nod slowly, his dick prods way back against your throat and you let off a gag. “aw, there’s that weak gag reflex of yours. so cute.”

gojo’s boxers were still on, just barely, pulled down just for you—you teasingly claw near the hem as you’re taking him into your mouth.

he watches you, breath hitching every few seconds and he’s just in awe. you’re so dirty, before he grabs your head, gradually shoving your head down and he hears you let off a satisfied, “mhmm.”

“you always know how to fuckin’ take it,” he murmurs, and you grab onto his flexed thighs once he starts to smoothly thrusts his hips into your mouth—you have the lewdest expression plastered on your face, the way your eyes rolled back, just drool escaping past your lips. gojo was all the way in, fully in, and you moaned, breathing through your nose.

by this point, you could barely breathe so he pulled you off, watching the strings of spit depart from your lips.

“pft. ‘s that all you can handle?” and you could hear the rasp in his tone, the kind of rasp that had you pulsing between your pathetic legs. “do you think ya deserve more?”

“y-yes,” you whined, licking your lips, already a mess since he pulled his cock out of your mouth. you wanted more, despite your gagging and utter mishap to take him longer than you thought. he was just so thick, a few inches down your throat felt like he was fully in, stuffing your mouth with such girth — the inches, it was something you couldn’t ever get enough of. “i can go longer, promise, ‘toru.”

“if you say so,” gojo snickers, and you’re already sticking your tongue out like a dumb cock-drunk girl. he purses his lips together, swiping his swollen tip all against your tongue—giving it a few smacks just to drag out a whimper from you. “now open wide, princess.”

you do, desperately anticipating his taste. he grunts, feeling you softly lick against his frenulum. the most sensitive spot he’s at, causing gojo to grip onto your hair again, giving it a slight yank.

“f-fuck, ‘s that’s it. hold it in, relax that throat for me ‘n keep me warm, yeah..”

gojo shudders at the feeling of your plump lips ghosting against his tip, and he’s buried all the way down your throat — thick cock having you an entire mess, just filthy. the very tips of your fingernails claw down his thighs as he’s pushing your head down every few seconds.

“good girl. pathetic, but good..” he tries to crack a joke at ridiculing you but ends up moaning from how good you’re taking him. “shit…”

with his thick shaft being hidden down your throat, you feel the sudden throb of a vein that’s running down him. gojo lets off a low sexy grunt at feeling your tongue tickle against it.

“stop f-fuckin’ trying to tease me, whore,” he mumbles, stammering over his words completely. once he moves your head down further, you gag and he groans, pulling back out just to watch your spit-coated lips tremor for more.

“god, you’re so nasty,” he pants, before smiling. “that’s okay though. as long as you’re nasty just for me.”

gojo tenderly brushes a thumb against your bottom lip while staring deep into your eyes. he gawks at how you whine, opening your mouth again—a sign that you wanted more of his taste and he clicks his tongue. “greedy girl, can’t get enough can you?”

“no,” you immediately spoke, leaning in to give his mushroom-tip a soft kiss. “i need more.”

“you don’t need anything,” he utters, bringing his eyebrows together. the sudden bass in gojo’s tone, the authority, you felt your pussy twitch. he’s still got a firm grip in your hair before he says. “you want. big difference, pretty girl.”

your lip quavers, growing impatient at his stalling before you correct yourself. “o-okay, i want more. please—please.”

“fine,” he rolls his eyes, with such sass he pulls your bottom lip down briefly with his thumb before uttering. “open up again. nice ‘n wide then.”

[ph4ngz]

i need isagi, bachira, nagi, reo, chigiri, kunigami, shidou, sae, rin & barou x fem! reader (all separate) doing it raw for the first time?? pls pls pls pls pls

DOING IT RAW || BLUE LOCK

MMMMMM *feral noises.*

ISAGI YOICHI

"You're... y-you're on the pill, right baby?" he asks as soon as his tip meets the soft, slick outline of your entrance. His eyes are clenched shut, nose scrunched up as he does everything in his power to focus on the unfamiliar sensation of real pleasure, no bullshit condom, just pure skin on skin with his favourite girl. "Oh, shit..." he moans out loud, his features twitching and contorting in ecstasy. He's loving every second, finally able to experience every detail with his jolting, excited cock. "G-God, I-... oh~ t-tight!" he cries out quietly, attempting to control his volume as his head rolls back. Every so often, he repeatedly slides his sensitive cockhead back and forth over your puffy clit, relishing in the way it feels to mix each other's arousal together before recklessly jostling it inside once more. "Why... how... are you so fucking good?~ ah-"

BACHIRA MEGURU

"Wait, I thought it felt good already... now it's gonna be even more delicious?~ oh, wow. You're tooooooo good to me, my girl~" he'd cooed against your soft lips when you'd suddenly told him to fuck you without protection. Bachira couldn't care less if he's got a condom on or not. As long as you're having fun, he'll cum his brains out anyway. Even untouched. "Soooo, ya like it? What gets you off, huh? Is it that you can feel it pulse inside you?~" he asks playfully and oh so shamelessly, poking his tongue out as he rests your legs on his shoulders. "Bachira Meguru~ d-don't be so... so lewd..." you whimper towards the end of your sentence, the way his pelvis grinds against your gooey pussy to drive his cock in deeper making your eyes roll back. "Huh~ what, you embarrassed? Hehehe, oh— mmmh, don't be silly, you're the one who's getting my dick wetter by the second."

NAGI SEISHIRO

Oh, he's all for it. All you had to do was mention the mere concept of it and he was hauling you into his lap with that pretty, blank stare of his. "Wanna do that now." he's murmuring into your ear with all the focus he can conjure up going toward the strength of his big hands, already trying to remove your pants without ripping them. "Ohooooo," Nagi whines deeply into your shoulder once his fingers get wet whilst slipping your panties aside, "you're so wet, I wanna stick it in. Can I please...?" he asks lazily, dragging his lips across your skin so sensually, slowly. "Knock yourself out." you grant him permission with a shared dreamy stare, not entirely knowing what you're getting into until he's slipping himself in immediately, balls deep within seconds. "Hhhhh... hhh- I love youuuu~" he's moaning and sighing so slowly and it's almost making your ears twitch to hear more. "Condoms are such a hassle, o-oh... never wanna go back~"

MIKAGE REO

"We can do it raw, right? Can we do it raw?" a few strands of purple fall in front of his eager eyes as he holds an unopened condom between his fingers, already so worked up by the mere thought of pushing his needy cock in without some stupid condom preventing him from feeling the thrill he needs. Reo is ready to toss it behind his shoulder at the drop of a hat, and you don't think he even saw you nodding until a split second after he threw it away... "Fuck yeah, I'm so ready for this right now... you ready sweetheart?" he doesn't even wait for you to answer before he's spreading your cute cunt with his thumbs, intently watching his pink tip squeeze past your slicked up folds. "Oh my fucking godddd-... been waitin' for so long~" you hear him groan as he squeezes your thighs tightly. Every inch of his hard dick feels like it's on fire due to the way your hot arousal is coating his sensitive skin more and more, no pesky condom in the way.

CHIGIRI HYOMA

The little smirk on his gorgeous face when you tell him... hehe. "You're being for real, yeah? Okay, just... just c'mere, I'm not waiting around." he drags your body into his, grinding his clothed cock into your ass from behind, huffing impatiently like a spoiled brat. "You're letting me bang you raw..." a pearly white smile graces his face, he looks proud that you're finally letting him do this. Eyebrows bowed in pleasure, he watches his perfect tip squish between your folds and gather some of his sparkling precum on the way inside. His eyes are rolling back every five seconds, so sensitive and vulnerable under the influence of your wet cunt, especially now that there's no protection. "W-Woah, I'm— hhhhholy shit. Don't move, I might cum on the spot~" he warns you with a pornographic whine, pushing his hair back so he can get a clear view of your pussy trying to keep him all inside. "...I can go as fast as I want to as well, mm?~"

KUNIGAMI RENSUKE

Ugh, he's doing his best to act like he doesn't give a shit. "Yeah... fuckin' sure, we can do that. Won't make much difference." he said. "Again... I need more- more~" he growls and sighs now. So stubborn, but you love it. How his hair somehow becomes more messy due to how fucking turned on he is, how he keeps trying to stop his frown from faltering every time you clench on his ruthless huge cock. He's already fucked his cum further into you twice, clearly not able to get enough of the amplified pleasure that comes with being allowed to release all up inside your velvety pussy for the first time. "Did you get even t-tighter or something...? Fuck, fuck— ugh~" he pounds into you hard enough to bruise, his huge breeder balls smacking against your ass whilst a growing streak of white dribbles from your abused hole each time he bottoms out. "Jesus, fuck! H-Hah~" he's almost got tears in his eyes, the sheer euphoria seeming to be strong enough to puncture his pride.

SHIDOU RYUSEI

This guy wants it. He fucking loves it. He pressured you into this, after all, knowing well that you were rather paranoid about unprotected sex no matter how bad you wanted to experience him raw. "Oh, baby... please? C'mon, you gotsta' loosen up a little to have more fun with me~" he roughly placed a hand over your forehead to thoroughly stroke your hair back, making sure you felt like you had nowhere else to look besides his own, unnerving eyes. "Or you could let this big, raw fucking cock do that for you..." he'd offered lowly, a certain seriousness in his tone that you just couldn't shake as his nose almost touched yours. And so here you are, his unforgiving length buried deep within your guts. You swear you can feel his heartbeat inside of you, his erratic breathing and whining almost confirming your suspicions. "Gonna let me do this, yeah?~ ah, this feeling is fucking perfect I swearrr..." Shidou groans with a twisted, dirty grin when he makes you nod eagerly for him, "oh my god... can feel all of you, hah, ah- shit."

ITOSHI SAE

"I won't refuse." is what he responds with when you snatch the condom wrapper from his hand and toss it to the bedroom floor. "Mm." Sae grunts softly when his bare and pulsating cockhead squeezes its way past your glistening, pretty entrance as both of his hands massage the flesh of your ass. If it were any other girl he was slowly dipping his cock into right now, they wouldn't think he could notice any difference at all. But you're not any other girl, you can sense him preventing his blunt nails from damaging your asscheeks, hear the sound of his throat closing up to prevent an outright whine, feel his fat dick trying to jump within the sultry contracting of your walls. "G-Go, all of it~" you demand sweetly, reaching your hands back to hold his own and tug him in. His breath shakes once his tensing balls touch your clit, the sensation of his solid length pressing the very limits of your insides without a layer of latex separating you causing a hardly controlled "yeahhh..." to escape from behind his gritted teeth.

ITOSHI RIN

God, he's trying way too hard. Acting as if he's not falling to bits right before your misty eyes, as if he's not on the verge of fucking drooling like a rabid animal at the way your hot slick connects the very end of his perfect cock to your throbbing entrance with a clear string. "...'re you ready?" he asks in that breathy, addictive voice of his whilst impatiently sliding his tip up and down between your soft, slippery lower lips. Please, please, please is what he's chanting inside. "Green light." you respond with a strained and sexy moan muffled by your forearm, feeling him trace a circle around your clit, a cooling drop of pre-cum latching onto it once he pulls back to position himself. It's when the first few inches of him are surrounded by your heat that he struggles to let go of his breath without holding it again. "Whew- Alright, fuck..." Rin pants slowly, his tough guy act starting to crack uncontrollably under the power of your perfect cunt.

BAROU SHOUEI

He said nothing when you agreed. Just pulled you in for the roughest kiss you've ever had. And suddenly, you're being bounced like a rag doll on his horse cock, every vein as prominent as ever along your fleshy, sticky walls. "Never show me a condom again." he grunts into your neck, his big hands gripping your perfect body with a steel grip like he could lose you if he let go. "I wanna fill you up... wanna fill you up with my cum- agh~ hhhnnggh..." his voice is deep and grumbly, vibrating against your skin as he bites a little to show some restraint. The manner in which your walls are spasming around his raw, long cock is making it increasingly difficult to keep himself in check. "Damn it, please... don't make me lose control of myself..." he pleads lowly, his huge arms holding you in position and bouncing you harder on his fat dick. "H-oh my-... good, good girl."

|| || || ||

[olderthannetfic]

There are some ppl who're really bitchy about having their name pronounced exactly the way it would be done in their language, even with people who have absolutely no linguistic connections with that language. Like people forget that not all languages are made from the same sounds and mouth and/or throat movements.

(Using one of my own names as an example.) Ppl doing dumb shit like "oh your name is Maria? Well that's tooooooo hard, how about I call you Marrrrryyyyyy teeeeheeee" is obvs absolute dumb shit people being dumb as shit. That's not even the correct name.

But I've also seen people just bitch about that their name was pronounced "Mah-ria" instead of Ma-ri-a" by someone who did try to get the name right, and then trying to make it a racism issue.

Most reasonable people probably won't give a shit if their name is pronounced "Mah-ria" instead of "Ma-ri-a" But some people will definitely blow a gasket even when their name gets pronounced as close as possible still, like"Ma-ri-ah".

Though I also had people who basically called me "May/Maya/Maia" and didn't seem to care much that that's not close to the pronunciation, and I doubt they did it because they wanted to be dumb shits, they just can't do the middle sound. So in the end I really don't care, since I know they're not doing it to be assholes and they still get what my name is.

The art is to distinguish between "dumb shit" and "says it wrong but doesn't do it to be a dumb shit"

--

Yeah. There are always going to be a few people who just are unreasonably oversensitive about the existence of accents. I encounter them far less frequently than the ones who are frustrated by years of disrespect, but they're out there.

People constantly say my name differently from how I pronounce it since Mom tried to give me a German name nobody here has, then misspelled it, and I don't pronounce it in an authentically German way anybody could predict. However, I'm in the majority. When people mispronounce it (relative to my own pronunciation), it's purely because my name is actually weird and not because they're trying to get away with things or think minorities are wacky. I don't give a shit about that. But if they try to re-shorten my already shortened nickname to "Fran" or they try to call me "Frances" or some other name in the same family, then they are just being a pain. You know that's not what I'm calling myself. You have ears.

A fair amount of the time, you can tell when someone listened and is trying and when they haven't and are not.

[shhisp]

No intention of posting a pesterlog drabble compilation to AO3 anytime soon, so. *throws Daverose into the abyss, rated T*

BRO: How d'you think we're gonna die?

MOM: ...

MOM: tbh idk thinkin abt that is tooooooo morbid 4 meeeee

BRO: That's fair. But it's all I think about, really.

MOM: …

MOM: hay dirk?

BRO: Yes?

MOM: yk i was thinkin abt the whole

MOM: harley havin us raise kids n stuff n how freaked out i am. n ik u havent liked talking abt it

MOM: which i get

MOM: i dont rly either

MOM: its

MOM: i dunno im just tryna think of a way 2 make it a lil more lighthearted for us ig

BRO: I don't have a fuckin' clue how you're gonna accomplish that, but be my guest.

MOM: i mean liek

MOM: what if they look like us??

MOM: n even if we live far away we can make em siblings

MOM: pretend theyre like made of our combined goo or somethin

BRO: Is this your way of coming out to me, Rox?

MOM: wtf as wha

MOM: OMFG WAIT CUM JOKE

MOM: idk im just thinkin

MOM: reaaaal hard

MOM: parentzzzzz

MOM: could be us

BRO: That would suck miserably, Rox.

BRO: I'm a faggot. You're an alcoholic.

BRO: Everyone we love is either close to dying or dead,

BRO: or, I guess, gone without an explanation.

BRO: I don't think we'd make great parents.

MOM: hypotheticals dirk

MOM: i dont wanna b sad i want hypotheticals

BRO: Okay.

BRO: Let's say we have twins.

BRO: Two little blonde buggers with a predisposition to all sorts of shit, both of 'em. The boy gets your traits, and the girl gets mine.

BRO: Maybe they're like us. Maybe they'll be the siblings we could never actually be.

BRO: Who knows, really?

BRO: But. And I'm just sayin'.

BRO: No offense to you, Rox,

BRO: I just. Man.

MOM: ???

BRO: They're gonna fuck each other, Roxy. They're gonna fuck each other so hard and we won't be able to do shit about it.

MOM: DIRKKKFKFHSHSHEHSD NOOOOOO STOPP LMAOOOADBSV

BRO: Nah. I'm being dead-fuckin'-serious.

BRO: We are so damn fucked up, Rox. They're gonna get all their wires crossed even worse than we got ours with that old man raisin' us.

BRO: She's gonna be the husband and he's gonna be the wife, and they'll have so many stupid babies and raise 'em all up in Alabama.

BRO: A tale for the ages.

BRO: Pure Hollywood.

[mushiewrites]

okay but seriously can you maybe go into what inspired you to write tiny boy big complaints, handsy hyperfixation (a classic), and the newest snf one?? and also maaaaybe the older one about teleporting if you wanna do that one too???

thank youuuuuu :))

- cal <333

from this milestone post / tiny boy big complaints / handsy hyperfixation / losing the battle winning the war / the troubles with teleporting

some of my favs in here <3

tiny boy big complaints my beloved ): and cals fav <3333 this fic is so special to me even though it's one of the lower note ones! it was actually a prompt sent in by cal (found here), so it's kind of hilarious to me it turned out to be his favorite one ):

I wanted george to be soft and tiny and I wanted dream to be soft but playful with him, and somehow I created one of my favorite things ever by doing so. I think this is another fic that I didn't really brainrot the concept with anyone, I am actually 99.9% positive I blacked out and wrote this entire thing and then made cal read it for me before I posted it and cal helped me pick the title tooooooo

cal is just the best is the bottom line actually :D this one was written for him and me and us and that's really all I can say about this one <3

- - - - - -

handsy hyperfixation was started december 26th, the morning after the dream team did their christmas stream, because I went completely insane over pictures of dreams hands (enjoy the blurry pictures <3)

then I sent these messages to cal (yes he is nick nelson) followed after I blacked out and wrote 4K words in one sitting:

then I let the fic sit until the end of february, and I finished it in the beginning of march. I will be honest, this one was absolutely 100000% a self indulgent fic, purely for myself and I didnt really care if I posted it or not. cal actually told me to name it "mushie's self indulgent hand fic", which....absolutely not....but it's correct. whatever. sue me, Im obsessed with dreams hands ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

this is my favorite thing I've ever written, it's my baby, it's 7.2K words for me and me alone lmfao. I actually was terrified to post it bc I didn't think anyone would read it, and now it's over 100 notes. I actually could cry thinking about how proud I am of it (even though I messed up some things in it, I don't care, I poured so much into this fic)

so yeah. that's handsy 🥺

- - - - - -

losing the battle winning the war was written 100% because of @wishitweresummer. this little idiot asked to commission me (which I said no to bc she's an idiot) bc she wanted to read about back of the neck raspberries....I wonder why? she also wanted it to be the first time george got back of the neck raspberries! cute, right? again....I wonder why :D

cal named it and its the perfect title tbh

summer requested for it to be playful and I know summer loves rough, so I made sure to really play up the snf fighting dynamic and I actually love what I created ):

she ALSO requested for george to struggle and be cocky, and for him to come out on top and completely destroy sap. she said she wanted it to be in a place that wasn't super common, a new spot for george to discover, and I adore the spot above the hip bc it's such a surprisingly sensitive spot! so that's how that was born

I truly just wrote this up to make sure I flustered the shit out of summer. I included things that people know get her and things that only I (and maybe one or two others) know about purely just to have summer yell at me for it :D

I love how this one turned out, targeted fics always turn out better to me for some reason <3

- - - - - -

the troubles with teleporting was the first time I ever wrote XD 🥺 this was a prompt that emma sent in, I can't find the actual prompt bc it was when my tumblr was a different name and the link is broken BUT

I remember just getting this idea to make the teleporting itself tk george at first instead of XD doing it right away, just bc I had the idea that it would kind of feel like when you go down a drop on a rollercoaster???? but a little more intense?

I also remember being super excited bc emma actually had the idea of the teleporting itself tkling instead of XD, but neither of us mentioned it to each other until after I wrote it that way! great minds think alike :D

again, it was my first time writing XD, and for those of you who don't know, XD is one of my all time favorite lers to read and write. I wanted to make sure I did XD justice, and I really love this silly lil fic, and how XD winds up just tkling the heck out of george at the end anyways (they even lifted george's arms up above his head while XD's bottom set got his ribs oh my goodness that was cruel huh 🫠)

the teases in this were pretty good too (':

[sweetheartmotives]

"I do the same thing in my room, except I listen to music and daydream!! 😭"

Soooo

Do you want me to tell you I listen to music purely to make up fake scenarios?

I literally can't listen to music without making a storyline of some kind anymore

Patrik... oh my god....

I DO TOOOOOOO 😨

[hischierschain]

What are your fav nicojack fics and blogs ?

omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg

too many. literally tooooooo many. i will give you my top 3 fics below ^-^

as for blogs… idk!!! i don’t follow purely nicojack blogs, i just dive nose deep into the 1386 tag, i rb a lot from @jonasiegenthaler (which i apologize for) 🫶🏼

i love this fic which is purely a social media au following jack (hockey player) and nico (model) and its so well done and everything about it is perfect

THIS ONE!!! kinda itty bitty secret identity and very much Nico Does Not Play Hockey and jack being grumpy (most of the time just hangry) and nico also! being so utterly in love with all versions of jack.

oh and! very much sub/dom written so well and beautifully i was very excited for the weekly updates 🤗 some background relationships in there too! but yes, this jack needs a hug and then another hug and then another hug (make sure you check tags before you go dive into it!!!)

[howdoyousleep3]

Hey mama! i hope it’s okay I call you that, i just found your fics and all the daddies are just hnngh!!! you’re just the best and your writing is pure magic, I’ve binged through nearly all of them!! Would you ever consider writing a sort of aftermath of ywwfnb where we see how the experience with steve and bucky changes Mr. Walkers and his boy’s relationship?

I hope you have a great weekend and i wish you lots and lots of creativity!

Oh my goodness, thank you so much! 🥺💖 I don't really have any intentions on exploring their relationship any further; it's something that I'll leave up to the readers' discretion.

Thank you!! I hope you have a good weekend tooooooo.

[gregoftom]

And also from the other day you were sososo right about them being the only people who actually like each other and enjoy each other’s company, even purely from a platonic sense nobody else in this show is consistently happy with anyone except for them two, at least not to the extent that they’d hold their relationship over any kind of business decision (especially with tom being willing to go to prison for Greg in 3x06 and shiv throwing tom under the bus in 2x10) and I know it’s because neither of them came from the same wealth as the Roys and didn’t have the trauma and childhood of living as a Roy, as one of Logan’s children, so it makes sense that they’re the ones with the least fucked up views of relationships and the capacity to enjoy the kinds of wealth they live in together and ahfkgfdhtksethksth I love them smmmmm <3333

OH AND ALSO off topic but I saw somewhere that the costume designer works so that Tom and Greg’s outfits always pair well together whereas his and Shiv’s deliberately contrast and now I CAN’T STOP THINKING ABOUT IT because holy shit it’s so true they match so well <333

LIKE LOOK AT THEM (<3)

AND THEN LOOK AT SHIV (<3)

YESSSSSSSS GAWD LIKE I ALWAYS SAY THIS BUT "i love you but i cannot fucking stomach you" IS SUCH A RAW ASS FUCKING LINE FROM SHIV AND WHAT HURTS IS HOW MUCH IT APPLIES TO LITERALLY EVERYBODY ON THE SHOW, save for. you guessed it! tom and greg! [and willa and connor]. like???? it just makes me OOF so much because their friendship is just so. it's so. they offer some light to the dark you know? there cannot be darkness without light and there cannot be light without darkness so they have to be there to offer some of the light to this bleak as fuck show. love is something you just do. like is something you don't work for like that... i dunno it just. the likeness comes to them so naturally you know? like after all the bullshit of meeting one another and their defence mechanisms and not knowing if it's real is out the way and they're still with each other, they start to see that they like and care for one another and it's NOT A JOB, ITS NOT HARD WORK. it just happens! loving is hard work! liking is not! at least in the context of this showwwwowoekwd like holy fuck.

AND ABOUT THE WEALTH YEAH. YEAH. those two are the only ones who seem to be able to spend their wealth on things that make them happy both alone and together. they do it for comfort. wealth in terms of the emotional and affectionate too, they give each other. just god. A. i love them tooooooo so much <333

AND AAAAAA THE COSTUMES YEAH. YEAH. YEAH. they specifically say they complimented the outfits with each other BUT I DIDNT KNOW ABOUT THE SHIV THING AH. god. help. BUT YES i do see here with the pics you senttttt oh mgyfuijkmewlfwef. PLUS the whole. tom wearing a suit called a gregory in 3.09 like what the fuck??????? what the fuck. what the fuck!!!! don't even SPEAK to me about this episode though with those mfs oh my god they were unhinged asf, ridiculous! moving their hips towards each other, greg acting the ever de-escalating spouse "he's a lovely guy", THE FUCKEN. PROVE IT. lord. loooord. i am Weak.

[theinsterminators]

chat i am deadass mortified.

girl im sitting here in bed right

and

my mom is in the room

all of a sudden i hear her go "so you're just a little guy??"

and i look up cus idk what shes talking about

and.

i freeze

shes holding up the fucking

whiteboard we (sys) have

the whiteboard. that we use. for external communication.

and there was a conversation between me and another headmate there that i forgot to erase. i almost cried. im so glad she just brushed it off (seemingly) because if i had to explain myself i'd probably just try to run out the room or hide under the covers. its bad enough if she finds out im trans, but its worse if she finds out im trans AND plural. i would rather drink pure fucking sulfuric acid than come out to her as either one, let alone both.

she was holding the whiteboard bc ig she found the dry erase markers laying around somewhere and felt the fucking need to put them where they belong kr whatever which was clipped to the whiteboard. like listen woman dont touch my fucking shit dont look at whatever the fuck i write and DONT REARRANGE MY FUCKING SHIT IF I DONT FUCKING ASK YOU TOOOOOOO.

my day is fucking ruined. i hate this shit. anyways! time to drown this shit in reblogs so it's never seen! 😁😁😁

[connorsui]

I ain't gonna lie to you, my luv, when I say I thought this was a pure oneshot, just a fluffed out three-way relationship between us , satoru, and suguru but It has me overjoyed to imagine that this will become a little series of its own with possible angst ..bittersweet cakes and honeyed fluff for the middle 🩷✨️ ...because satoru might be sweet towards us ..by carrying us to our bed ..treating us like we are the only thing we matter ..

But you can smell the tension between satoru and suguru ...like there's sum else they want to say to each other ..but they are keeping themselves civil for our sake ..🧍🏻‍♀️💔

I wouldn't necessarily be surprised if these two would have had an argument at any moment ...or would have started a fight due to their differences of their ideology...but it does have me thinking how they view us ..in the midst of all this?? ..satoru mentioned he always wanted to meet his God (us basically) and he might mean that in a joking manner ..

But what if he starts to wonder why we have made his and sugurus relationship like this?? ..like why did you make our lives have this much sorrow and depression?? ...what were you thinking when you were painting us?? 💔🧍🏻‍♀️ ...did you always intend for us to be like this??

...gooddssssssssss I hurt myself in the process 😭😭😭💔💔 and I didn't MEAAANNN TOOOOOOO 💀💀💀 BUT YOU SEE THE VISION I FORCE UPON THESE WORDS MY LUV!?!?!? ITS FILLED WITH SO MUCH SADNESS IT DESERVE SUM ANTIDEPRESSANTS 😭😭😭💔

Thooooo pleeeaseeee my author my luv ...this little first chapter you have developed really do be making me feel all levels of emotional suffering I could ever imagine ..and if this is enough to make me feel this way ...than I will beg to my knees to receive another ounce of your gold out of your mind ✨️🩷

Cuz all of this be making me feel so sweet and yet so depressed 😭😭🩷

Waste The Night

Painting!Gojo x Painter!reader x Painting!Geto

Summary: In a haunting twist of fate, your tragic painting suddenly springs to life, its sorrowful characters and somber scenes manifesting before your eyes.

1

Masterlist Main Masterlist

You wipe the sweat off your face, inadvertently smudging your cheeks even more. Your hands move incessantly, unable to cease their motion. Colors and shapes flow effortlessly from your fingertips, each adding to the canvas's unique beauty.

You've never felt this level of excitement and inspiration before, a whirlwind of emotions swirling within you. Could it be the result of the new brush you purchased from the antique store?

Lost in the act of painting, you've lost track of time entirely. Hours, maybe even days, have slipped away unnoticed, leaving cups of cold coffee scattered around you. You haven't slept or showered, and the dizziness in your head only fuels your desire to create even more.

As you drop your brush, a sense of awe washes over you, leaving you feeling deeply satisfied. The character you crafted, Gojo Satoru and Geto Suguru where tragically marked by a friendship torn apart by conflicting ideologies and the weight of betrayal and loss. Once close comrades, their bond shattered as they diverged on opposing paths, leading to a series of events that deepened the rift between them. Their story serves as a poignant reminder of how even the strongest friendships can be undone by tragedy and the choices made in its wake.

"So pretty..." you weakly murmur before everything fades to black. You drop unconscious.

You awaken with a dull ache throbbing in your head, groaning softly as you blink against the bright light streaming through your bedroom window.

Wait... bedroom?

Your last memory is still of your studio. How did you end up here? You vividly recall someone gently carrying you to bed, but it must have been a hallucination induced by exhaustion.

You shake your head, unwilling to think on it too much. You look at the clock, shows 4 PM. You've been sleeping for so long. Getting up from the bed, you prepare to take a shower, realizing you must smell quite unpleasant after your prolonged time in the studio.

After finishing your shower, you dress and head downstairs to make some food. But before that, you quickly detour to your studio, eager to sneak a peek at your painting.

You gaze at your painting, now bathed in the gentle sunset glow, its beauty taking your breath away. Delicately run your fingers over the painting, feeling the texture of the still-damp canvas beneath your touch.

You find yourself smiling at the handsome faces depicted in the painting, feeling a warmth spread through you that makes you giggle like a schoolgirl. Blushing with embarrassment, you decide to tear yourself away and head downstairs to start your dinner.

After finish, you sink into the sofa, gazing up at the ceiling. The silence of your house weighs heavily, accentuating the sense of loneliness. With few friends around and most occupied with their own lives, you find yourself craving companionship. You can't help but wish for the power to create someone to share your days with.

You groan and stretch. Deciding it's time to clean up since you haven't done it for days, you get up and start tidying your place. Clean every corner of your place, sweeping away dirt, mopping up spills, and dusting off surfaces. Afterward, you gather up the trash and take it out, leaving your home feeling refreshed and tidy.

You sigh loudly, feeling the weight of exhaustion settling in as you realize it's already 8 PM. After freshening up, you decide to return to your studio.

When you coming up to stairs, suddenly, you hear a loud noise emanating from your studio, causing you to jolt.

Seems something fell off? Did i forgot to close the window?

You quickly run to your studio, scared if your paintings are ruin.

As you cautiously open the door, your breath catches in your throat at the unbelievable sight before you. Your body freezes in shock, unable to articulate the horror unfolding before your eyes. Standing in your studio are two men, neither fully strangers, their presence sending they step forth from their canvases into the realm of reality.

Your knees buckle beneath you, sending you crashing to the ground as a wave of weakness overtakes you. Your throat constricts, rendering you unable to scream, while each breath feels like a struggle, threatening to suffocate you. Tears well up in your eyes as panic grips your heart.

What's happening? Am I hallucinating? Is it because I haven't slept enough? Am I experiencing schizophrenia?

The questions swirl in your mind, adding to the overwhelming sense of confusion and fear.

"D-Demons?" The words barely escape your trembling lips.

The figure with long black hair emits a soft chuckle at your question, while the one with white hair approaches you slowly.

"Hey... shhh... it's okay... I won't hurt you," he reassures you in a gentle tone, his words offering a faint glimmer of comfort amidst the overwhelming fear.

You look up, meeting his ocean-blue eyes, which somehow manage to calm your racing heart ever so slightly. You know those eyes, you make them.

"S-Satoru?" you stammer, the name escaping your lips.

He smiles warmly, his teeth glinting in the dim light as he hears you call his name.

"Yes?" he responds, his voice gentle and reassuring.

You glance aside from Satoru, meeting the gaze of the man behind him who has been staring at you the whole time.

"Suguru?" you called

He finally smiles, but you can sense the darkness lurking behind those pretty face.

"Yeah?" he replies, his voice carrying a chilling undertone that sends shivers down your spine.

You rise slowly, feeling Satoru's gentle support as you regain your footing. Closing your eyes, you take a deep breath, attempting to calm down and processing thw sutuation.

Opening your eyes again, you walk over to your chair and silently take a seat, fixing a measured gaze on both Satoru and Suguru.

"How?" you finally speak

"We... actually don't know," Satoru begins, his voice tinged with uncertainty. "All I remember is that we were in the midst of a fierce battle, and then there was a blinding light... and here we are."

Suguru nods in agreement, taking a step closer to you.

"All I remember is killing those stinky monkeys until he bothered me," he adds with a coldness that sends a chill down your spine.

"Wait what? You killing monkeys?"

His grin widens as he leans in closer, his face mere inches from yours. His hand gently lifts your chin, forcing you to meet his intense gaze.

"Yeah... are you one of them?" he whispers, his eyes boring into yours with a piercing intensity that feels like he's peering into your very soul.

"I-i.. .n-no.."

"Stop, you're scaring her, Suguru" Satoru said, pushing him away from you with a firm hand.

"Am I?" Suguru asks with a smirk, directing his gaze towards Satoru.

You look at them with panic and fear, your voice trembling as you plead.

"P-please, don't fight!"

"Ah ah...how sweet that voice..is that please i heard? What's your name, dove?" Suguru taunts make his smirk wider.

"Y/n l/n...."

"Don't try to do anything stupid, Suguru. She's the one who created us," Satoru warns sternly, his tone leaving no room for argument.

"Wait... does that mean... I manifested you guys?" you piecing together the puzzle until realization dawns on you. Rising from your seat, you reach for the new brush.

"Is this... brush... a magic brush?!"

Suguru laughs mockingly, his voice laced with sarcasm. "A magic brush, huh? You've got quite the power. Looks like you're not just a monkey after all."

Meanwhile, Satoru approaches you with a pensive expression. "I think it is a magic brush," he muses. "I mean, we only come alive when it's 8 PM until..we dissapear at 8 AM."

"Really? Oh, wow..." you murmur, feeling a mix of awe and disbelief wash over you. The silence in your studio is palpable, leaving you at a loss for words. You scratch awkwardly behind your neck.

"Uhm... so... what now?" you inquire tentatively.

"Make me food," Suguru demands.

"Have you eaten?" Satoru asks

"O-oh? Not yet... well, I can make something for us? Since you both are living here now," you offer tentatively.

"Can I help?" Satoru volunteers eagerly.

Suguru scoffs at the suggestion. "Don't even let him touch anything in your kitchen; he'll blow it up."

Satoru bristles at the comment. "Hey! I'm not that bad!"

Suguru points an accusatory finger at him. "You almost burned down the kitchen back then!"

"I was 17!" Satoru defends himself.

"So? I can cook better than you. You're just a spoiled prince." Suguru retort.

"G-guys? Hey... it's okay. I'll cooking for you both" you interject, trying to diffuse the tension

As you decide to make fried rice for them, you start cooking while they sit at the table, silently judging each other with an air of tension.

"Can one of you prepare the plates, please? They're in the right drawer," you request.

"I can do it," Satoru offers, getting up to retrieve the plates.

You serve them the fried rice, the sweet aroma dancing in the air, eliciting a chorus of appreciative murmurs.

"Mhm... smells good," Satoru comments, being the first to try it, followed by Suguru, and then yourself.

"I'm glad you like it," you say with a smile, relieved that your cooking has met with their approval.

Satoru eats the fried rice messily, devouring it as if he hasn't eaten in days. Suguru, witnessing this, shakes his head in disapproval and swiftly shove him a tissue.

"Are you a kid? Control yourself, Satoru" he scolds, his tone laced with irritation.

You, observing the exchange, can't help but smirk at the display of their dynamic. Despite their hostility towards each other, they still care in their own way. It's a reflection of the complex relationship you envisioned while painting them. All exactly like in your head.

"What are you smiling for?" Suguru questions, catching your smirk.

"Nothing... Can I ask something?" you ask, diverting the conversation.

They both nod in response.

"Did either of you carry me to bed last night?"

"Not me, I didn't want to get dirty," Suguru dismisses.

"It was me! I carried you. Seems like you overworked yourself while making us," Satoru admits with a hint of concern in his voice.

"Oh... yeah... my art exhibition is next week, so I had to finish the painting. But I accidentally broke the brush, so I quickly bought a new one... from like... an old antique store," you explain, feeling slightly flustered.

"Why would you get a paintbrush from an antique store?" Suguru scoffs, raising an eyebrow in disbelief.

"It's the closest one to my house! I was panicked, okay?" you defend yourself.

"Well, thanks to that brush, i get to see my own god now," Satoru says with a grin, his eyes twinkling with amusement.

"I'd rather continue killing those monkeys," Suguru retorts dryly.

"What's wrong with you?" Satoru's voice in serious tone.

"There's nothing wrong with me. They're just a bunch of monkeys. They're just a burden. They're weak. Why would I die for something like them?" Suguru's response is cold and dismissive.

"Suguru, enough!" Satoru's tone grows stern, his patience wearing thin.

"You would never understand, Satoru," Suguru retorts, his words dripping with bitterness.

You gulp nervously, watching a drama scene infont of you.

"W-well... I'm gonna go to sleep now. You guys can continue fighting in the paintings, okay? Dont break anything. Bye..." you stammer, attempting to diffuse the tension and escape the uncomfortable situation.

However, before you can make your exit, Satoru quickly grabs hold of your shirt.

"I'm coming... with you... please," he pleads, his voice softer now, tinged with vulnerability.

"Really? Satoru?" Suguru scoffs, his skepticism evident in his tone.

Now, how can you say no to that face? I mean, it's a chance to sleep with a handsome man beside you. Yes, you are that lonely, okay.

"Okay... but it's kinda narrow in my bed," you reluctantly agree.

"It's fine, I'll make sure you get your own space," Satoru assures you with a smile.

You glance at Suguru, who is already looking at you with evident displeasure.

"You can come too, Suguru," you offer, trying to diffuse the tension.

"Only because I can't get into the painting without him," Suguru retorts, rolling his eyes in annoyance.

You can't believe this. Two hot men are now laying beside you in your bed. How can you ask for more? Can you?

Now you're not regretting buying that king-size bed at a discount that day when the salesman pressured you into it.

You lie on your back, with Satoru lying on his side facing you and Suguru facing away from you.

But now, the one thing you regret is not buying a bigger blanket.

"Uhm... Suguru... are you cold?" Worriedly try to cover him with blanket but his hand stop you wrist.

"Don't think about me, my clothes are warm enough," Suguru dismisses.

"Oh... good," you mutter, feeling a bit relieved.

Then, Satoru whines softly, catching your attention.

"Yeah?" you respond, turning to face him.

"I won't be able to see your face in the morning," he whispers with a hint of sadness.

"Well... you can still see me until 8 o'clock," you reassure him.

"It's not enough..." he whispers back, his voice filled with longing.

"Oh... Satoru..." you murmur softly, a smile playing on your lips.

"Shut up, and go to sleep!" Suguru scolds, breaking the moment with his usual brusque demeanor.

You smile at Satoru, exchanging the silent understanding before slowly closing your eyes. You can't help but hope that this surreal experience isn't just a dream or hallucination.

As you drift off into sleep, you find yourself looking forward to waking up early. You yearn to see their faces in the morning, eager to confirm that this unexpected twist of fate is indeed real. With that thought in mind, you succumb to the embrace of sleep, hoping that tomorrow will bring answers to the mysteries surrounding your newfound companions.

Hoping yall like the first chapter! I use number 8 as a symbol of infinity lol. Thanks for the notes, reblogs make feel more appreciated<3

[nothingneverforever]

A little bit of everything :)

For the longest time, I have wanted to write about The Split (Seasons 1-3, 2018-2022). And too for a long time, I have neglected almost all of the creative, literarily effortful sides of myself. I met with my literature teacher from my 2 years in India recently when he visited Singapore and was so moved to realise that for a while, I was known intimately by those around by as someone who wrote about the films I liked and didn't like and this was a part of my identity that 10 years on even a teacher can recall. And yet so disappointed to reflect on how I have left those selves behind. But today I sit at my personal laptop again possibly for the first time in a year with Lotus Inn by Why Don't We playing on loop, as it has been for the last two weeks straight. There is a psychosis to my music consumption where I almost never want to listen to anything but when I do, it can be something so painfully me that I had to get it tattooed on my back (#dawnmistglowing <3) or something that like tonight's, its band name alone tells you enough about the sheer lack of caliber. But it is simply perfection for the needs of the night and again I feel like the bestwalkhome Maya :)

Okay but a false start first before I try my absolute best to reconnect with the deep thinking, witty commenting, cute side of me...:

Had forgotten when my last post here was so I went to take a look and found Stuff I’ve just watched and almost completely did not enjoy (typically epic title sis!!!) from June 2023. It is so beautifully prophetic that this should have been my last paragraph:

... when the last two movies I have only just two hours ago finished watching by myself on Netflix were Horrible Bosses and Horrible Bosses 2. Hahahahahhaha.... fucking disgusting btw. Me i mean... for watching that shet and sitting through it for 4 hours wtf :'( am I that lonely?????

Okay but a lovely segue has found itself in: Want to hear of a show with indeed no freaking stupid idiot sex references or scene? But instead with the best sexual affair ever!?!?!!?

Tfw when you take part in the female-written female-led family law drama with equal parts shock and grief and sheer joy and confusion and ambiguous morality and beautifully affecting pain competition but your opponent is the split... Mic drop.... nuff said...

I had thought about so many angles I had wanted to take in putting my feelings on this show down. Perhaps the most obvious one would be to highlight the queen that is Nicola Walker and talk about how her presence made the show. Nicola Walker... whose eyes tell about five to seven stories on average with the slightest glance and re-focusing of her gaze, and whose unequalled skills graced River (2015), Unforgotten (Series 1-4, 2018-2021), creating the trifecta of some of the most intense, resonant, pure raw emotion-led dramas in British television history. Hyperbole aside, in complete honesty, that gaze of hers and the genuine empathy that oozes slowly, comfortingly, and so intelligently from her eyes is something that is too tooooooo inspiring for me at work omfg! I love you so much Nicola!!!

I had first watched season 1 years ago with my mother, and we had both loved it and cried along with it but it was the recent re-watching with Imran earlier this year (and my first watch of seasons 2 and 3) that made me think a lot harder.

Season 1 ended with Hannah (Nicola Walker) deciding, after bearing the weight of her husband's humiliating infidelity for the earlier episodes, to give in to her deepest suppressed feelings of attraction to her current colleague and ex-bestie and to sleep with him. And before he leaves London for a job in Chicago due to his misconceived perception that his attraction to Hannah wasn't returned, Hannah tells him simply, joyfully, the morning her estranged father died, to stay. Aiya shit I wanted to find the exact line she used and just paused to do a Google for 15 minutes to find either a stream online to find the episode or a website with the full scripts but no luck for both. She said something damn nice la it wasn't "stay", I remember in my first watch with my mother I thought it was but then I realised when re-watching that it was something else... Imran do you remember?!?! omg. Need to know now but ANYWAY it was a short phrase that shook the world because this was an upright and principled woman and mother and wife making a very clear conscious decision to have an affair. And most terrifying for the viewer (me... maybe other ppl dont care lol) was that we really, really wanted the affair for her.

This reminds me of the discussion Imran Jade and I just had last night about Trying (2020-2024) and how in a straight relationship, when a woman is unfaithful, it just hits different from when a man is. IT'S JUST FACTS OKAY?!!?!?

But still, that obvious life fact aside, I mean we were reaaally rooting for Hannah, and not just because her husband had been unfaithful prior. The affair (in season 1... ain't gonna talk about season 2 when she lost her mind hehe and was kissing in her office with the door open wtf ew!) was something fulfilling, cathartic, meaningful and natural. And it takes a lot for me to say this iykyk!!!

So anyway, that was the initial angle I was considering - more of an analysis of the actor's genius to make an otherwise controversial subplot something that heals us. But then a while later, I watched this on Netflix this year:

Honestly wouldn't have clicked on it but Aki wanted to watch it with my mother and I needed an excuse to do some cardio so skipping while watching the first episode it was. And immediately I knew there was something else beneath the surface of the deadbeat abusive father... something quieter and more sensitively done than I'd expected from the promotional content (e.g. the above picture). And when the credits rolled, I was able to put my finger on it:

Abi Morgan, who wrote/created not only The Split and Eric, but also River... You know the storytelling ability is certifiably legendary when an almost-any-and-every-female-written-show-loving-cinephile like me enjoyed in uniquely different ways all three shows independently before realising they were from the same brain.

So after this realisation, I thought hmm... what stands out about The Split goes beyond Nicola Walker's brilliance but is really about what a story is, can be, how it can challenge, frustrate, and bring so much self-awareness to the viewer. And I have to love Abi Morgan so so so much for this.

Oh but one last thing about Nicola Walker if I may: Unforgotten genuinely turned the British crime/police thriller genre on its head, even more so than Broadchurch (2013-2017) which had a similar thread of humanness running through it, and the distinguishing factor between these two is indeed Nicola Walker's skills. And when she is up against Olivia Coleman in the similar lead role in Broadchurch... that's how you know she is Her <3

Uhh... I think I am done hehe. Did I in fact say anything at all about the show? Perhaps not at all. Some final smatterings:

Tamil pride whoooo (one of the sister's husbands, James, in The Split is seemingly Tamil and the actor's family name is Dharmalingam and his wiki says he's of Sri Lankan heritage so imma just assume he's Jaffna Tamil ba

Well-done subplot of how being a wonderful, perhaps even the best father =/= being a good partner and husband

Should I study to be a lawyer some day???? And slay it like a boss?!

Okay since this post was all sound and fury signifying literally nothing, let me show that there is still some of the 2015 film-analysist self in me (bruh just pause and think about how fucking epic my The Amazing Spider Man 2 x Ralph Ellison's Invisible Man post was... wtaf!!!), I need to show off about two parallels I observed in Inside Out 2 (2024) that I finally saw in cinemas today:

Wasn't the cinematic representation of the 'beliefs' a lot like Wreck-it-Ralph 2's insecurities virus manifestation?

And also a few very Soul (2020)-esque scenes and specific moments and moods right? Yall got notice? No right just me cos I'm so smart?!!?!?

Keke

Night all... Some day I shall be so so so serious and real again. It is always in there, it is. I know it is <3

Pls listen best song ever:

[mangoposts]

i love concerts like im going to 7 concerts this year and ive already been to 2 so like so fun and i have a few festivals im going to like seeing people sing live is genuinely my happy place

ME TOOOOOOO i swear concerts are pure therapy and so many good artists are touring this year i have 5 more to go🙂‍↔️

[guiltygearxrd2]

Ruining parents day as an autistic adult not bc I’m visibly autistic in public but purely bc I ordered ice cream at lunch time and commencing a chorus of “MOMMY I WANT ICE CREAM TOOOOOOO” across the queue

[pippasop]

JEJEJE I WAS RHINKING OF THAT EARLIER TOOOOOOO THERES LITERALLY NO OTHER THAT FITS THAT ROLE OTHER THAN THEM!!! 😭🫶

SO LIKE THESE ARE THE ROLES ID ASSIGNED HAMILTON CHARACTER IF I DID CONTINUE THIS AUU

Sateriasis Venomania = not sure yet jeje

Banica Conchita = Angelica

Kayo sodou = Maria (Maybe Eliza but idkk)

Gallerion Marlon = Alexander Hamilton (PURELY BECAUSE AARON IS NEMESIS LMAOO)

Nemesis Sudou = Aaron Burr

Riliane Lucifen d'Autrich = King George III

Allen Lucifen d'Autrich = Seabury

Evilloys chronicles x Hamilton... the demons..

[ziaron]

I love when a big, scary yandere gets an OUNCE of affection from their darling and suddenly they melt like putty in their hands. Even if it's clearly a ploy for more freedom, they can't help but indulge in sweet kisses and kind words, if only for a moment before the Darling tries something a little too risky and has to be put back in their place.

Vjsogihfkfo ME TOOOOOOO AH,,,, lemme get on w the story >;)

Your mind is racing as you feel yourself about to keel over and die at any second. A moment ago you knew exactly what was coming... flinching when responding to him meant you'd at the very least get a few hits to the face, adding onto a growing collection of bruises.

Although now, you wait anticipation and terror after kissing him almost instantaneously in an effort to avoid any sort of punishment.

Both your widened eyes locked onto one another, till he slowly covers his mouth with the back of his hand...

'Wait. . . am I not going to be punished? holy shit.'

With his other hand, he reaches for the top of your head and pats it awkwardly before leaving the room, and you, behind.

The following day began differently than every day prior. Instead of the usual constant berating and sadistic torture he was oddly quiet. Content with simply watching you in fascination as you eat food for the first time in a few days- thanks to him no less.

'I'm not stupid- obviously getting him to think I like him is key to getting the fuck out of here.. I wish I didn't waste all that time screaming... maybe I could have been out already.' your heart aches at the thought of life before- him...

He never gave you his name and you never asked so it's always been 'him' 'asshole' 'piece of shit' and any other slurry of insults you could get in before getting your ass handed to you. But he never broke you. Ever. You refused it purely out of spite and anger, and the worse it got the more anger you had to hold onto.

"Hey.." You soften the tone of your voice till it became almost a whisper. He jerks his head up and replies..

"Yes?"

"The handcuffs... can you take them off."

His face fills with anger and suspicion until you quickly add "I wanna hug you. I... I had a really bad dream..."

it's the only thing you could really come up with in time.. 'What am I a child? He's totally going to kill me... fuck fuck fuck!'

Silence filled the room but you couldn't bring yourself to even glance in his direction until you hear him say "Mm." Before gently taking off the handcuffs and squeezing you tightly.

'Holy fuck- holy fuck- holy fuck it worked. It fucking worked oh my god.' Is what your thinking as your hands cautiously embrace them back.

You're not weak, you remind yourself. It isn't weak to cry. It's necessary in situations where you are kidnapped by a sadistic psychopath. It's even more necessary when that psychopath will think their soothing you.

You reassure yourself as you begin to cry, all the emotions you've been holding up till now come out in his arms. It doesn't help that they're the only human contact you've had for months.

Yan's hand moves to stroke the back of your head. Their voice softly shushes you and tells you that it's okay, that it was all a dream.

But it's not. The nightmare isn't over. The nightmare is still very much in the same room as you.

"C-can we watch a movie? Together?" The only tv's are in the living room, and in yan's bedroom. Either way, you're out of the basement you loathe so much.

"Well- since you asked so nicely.." he says coyly, holding your hand tightly as they saunter upstairs with you. Chest puffed out and proud they can take such good care of their darling.

Your eyes don't linger too long on any of the doors or hallways to avoid arousing suspicion.

You sit down on the couch with his arm rapped around you as he flips through channels. Eventually landing on one you say you like. Hours tick by, and you can tell he's getting tired. You even lay your head on him to further gain his trust. Close your eyes, keep your breathing still... and for gods sake. Dont. Move.

You almost convince yourself you are dreaming when you feel his free hand move to brush some of your hair out of your face... with no response, not even a flinch, he definitely thinks you're sound sleep.

You can feel him shift as his weight and leave the couch. Hearing the shuffle of tired feet followed by the click of a light switch and the closing of a door, your heartrate begins to climb.

Your eyes pop open. 'He's gone? Where is he? Will I have enough time? Fuck it. FUCK IT!'

You make your way down the hallways unsure of whether to focus on silence or speed. Ultimately failing to do both since the moment after you unlocked the 3 locks on the door, and swung it open to meet the cold midnight air, you hear his quickly gaining footsteps behind you.

"FUCK!!!! GODDAMN IT Y/N!"

You pay him no mind as you run into the dark woods surrounding all sides.

'I'm not gonna be fast enough! I'm not gonna be fast enough!!! Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck!!'

The forceful yank back on your hair solidified your waking fears. Throwing you on the ground you look up to see his face seething with rage.

You start to burst into tears- you dont care what happens you're just scared so scared so so so fucking scared.

He drags you by your hair the rest of the way "home" your back is soon to be covered in gashes and scratches from the rocks and sticks on the ground. But you'll pay them no mind. There's something much more terrifying awaiting.

Yan doesn't stop until they meet the door to the basement. Kicking you down the stairs and watching you begin to beg for mercy.

"Shut. The. Fuck. Up. And take off your clothes." He looks at you like you're scum, dirt, worthless. You're paralyzed in fear- but his patience has already been tested once today.

His heavy boot meets your face, knocking you down flat against the floor. Before you could recover his shoe is crushing your windpipe. Your hands desperately attempt to pry him off you, only until your struggling begins to die and he knows you've passed out does he lift his boot from your neck.

.

.

Gasp, cough cough

"Well!" Your voice croaked "Good to be back to your old self, huh?!"

You smile wide, false bravado has always been your forte in times of immense fear. You've got dear ol' dad to thank for that, you guess. Judging from the fact that he has your hands cuffed tightly behind a support beam, half naked, immense fear is in fact what you should be feeling.

For once in the entire time you've been here, he doesn't respond to your provocations. All he does is ram his knife into your thigh in one swift motion.

"GODDAMN IT FUCK FUCK OW FUCK FUC-" Your screams are cut short as he tightly grabs your face, digging his nails into the soft skin on your cheeks as he says,

"First, I'm gonna cut you up nice and pretty. Then I'm gonna fuck you so hard you won't be able to even crawl."