#this is also why we haven't gotten a new stove

[raspberryconverse]

Today I had to tackle the cat with a towel so we could give her her asthma inhaler.

While I am very proud of my ability to move quickly and grab her as she tried to run away without crushing her tiny ancient body, it also was a moment of realizing, "So this is my life now..."

[shepherds-of-haven]

hii! i'm a new author working on my first if, and i'm really not doing great tbh. shepards of haven is (my current hyperfixation) sosososososo good and so expansive and just generally the best thing ever and i'm aware that you've been writing this story for years and that's probably why it's so amazing but i'm not having a fun time over here and i was wondering if you have any tips for worldbuilding or if you could share like a general overview of your process? thank you so much :))

Hi there, I'm sorry to hear you're not feeling great about your project at the moment! I think my #writing advice tag could be helpful to you, since that's where I stick all the posts and answers about writing tips and worldbuilding advice from this blog, as well as my @strangevoyages blog, which is exclusively focused on my authorial career and writing-related tips and tricks, so it might be easier to parse through for advice! This post I wrote last year, in particular, could be helpful for worldbuilding, as well! (As well as this post for my general tips for beginning writers of interactive fiction!)

On top of all that, though, I think the best piece of advice I can add on for you is to be patient with yourself! As you mentioned, I've been working on Shepherds for over 20 years now: it was basically the first story I ever wrote, and I still haven't published it in a complete form yet. My first novel, We Have Always Been Here, also took about four years to complete, and in that amount of time, I burned it completely to the ground and started it over from scratch FIVE TO EIGHT TIMES before I got so sick of looking at it I just had to submit it. And I thought I would start my second novel directly after that, starting a few months after WHABH's completion in 2019. It's been four years since then and I'm still figuring out the world and characters of that second novel, to the point that I've also started and completely scrapped the story three or four times... I didn't even settle on the main cast or their names until earlier this year, so that's like 3 years where I didn't even know their names, let alone how their world worked. 🥹 And in the last four years, I've still only gotten as far as about ten chapters on this series, and my most current draft is only at four! (And I'm about to scrap some of that and start over again... 🥹)

At some point, you finally iron things out and the story details settle and actually click, and then you might be off to the races--but you've got to give yourself the time, patience, and understanding to actually get there first! I know that things can feel frustrating when it feels like you've run up against a wall or you just aren't feeling inspired, but letting things simmer for a while just allows the flavors of your story to complexify and deepen. You're creating a whole new world in your head, so give yourself a break! It takes time. Like a good soup, sometimes you have to let it sit on the stove for a bit and bubble away without poking at it impatiently and wishing it would hurry up or dumping ingredients in it to make it cook faster. In the meantime, consuming media that inspires you or that you genuinely love and enjoy--without turning it into the work and chore of "research"--might uncork or illuminate something you didn't even know was brewing. That's what I most often do when I'm feeling uninspired! I just leave everything where it is, meander away, watch or read or play something that intrigues me, and that often naturally sparks inspiration when I'm not thinking too hard about it. A watched p(l)ot never boils, so to speak!

I hope that (and my other posts linked above) help you in some way. Good luck with your writing and again, try not to be too hard on yourself! You're not alone, every writer feels this way: it's just a part of the process, but one that we can mitigate by giving ourselves time and patience. :) And thank you for the kind words about Shepherds, I'm glad you're enjoying it!

[kakashifanrp]

- Going between Dimensions -

Part 25 - The closer we get

Kakashi Hatake x reader

Masterlist

Taglist: @ari-hatake15, @fuzzyfestcat

Afther that day, it was like something changed between you both. The comfort cuddle became a regular, and a closeness had been building up between you and Kakashi that you couldn't describe. It was not sexual, nor pysichal.. It was something else, and something new. A new founded trust and intimatecy. It was coming to an end soon, whenever you both wanted or not. Now it had been a week and a half since you were able to go home from the hospital, and things started slowly to get back to normal when it came to your body.

"This week and a half has spoiled me" You whispered as you pulled the blanket further up around you two. Your head resting on his chest as usual, while he held you close to him. "oh? How spoiled?" The hoarse morning voice of his were something you never could get used too. It had a special cling to it, that made it almost adorable. "Being able to sleep in like this, not running around from early morning.. Being able to nap whenever.. It is just amazing, even if it makes me lazy" It was laughable.. Normally you were the one who enjoyed running around all day, everyday. "You would not like the check up today then..because you are going back to work from tomorrow" Kakashi chuckled before he looked down at you. Carefully removing some hair from your face.

"I forgot about that, better get up then..." You carefully popped up on your elbows. Sighing as soon as you felt the cold air between you as you had removed yourself from Kakashi a bit. "You should still take it easy.. Just in case, it is still a few hours until the check up" Kakashi was concerned still..even though he had seen it had gone well the past few days, you still had gotten easily tired and exhausted faster than normal..but you haven't collapsed like you did when you made the tea at least. "I know, and I will." You gave him a smile before getting up and went to find a fresh uniform to put on.

All the old and more baggy ones had been thrown away after you got the new fitted ones. You regretted getting rid of all of then, since once in a while it would be good to actually have a more loose fit option. You went to the bathroom and got changed and brushed your teeths before going to the kitchen to start on the tea. Soo far everything was going good. "I will never get used to seeing you in that kind of uniform" Kakashi stood by the doorframe, looking over at you. "You mean a fitted one? I have to say I am still not used to it.. But my fault I guess for letting Anko be in charge of it" You placed the red pot on the stove before getting two cups and hummed softly.

"what tea would you like?" Your brows were raised as you looked at the four packs on the shelf. Normally it would be easy to figure it out, but sending Kakashi to do the groceries meant you had three new packs and brands in your shelf that he wanted you to try. "This one, the one I told you about" He had walked up to you and grabbed one of the packs with green tea and urbs. "I thought you said that one was for sleep?" He shaked his head and grabbed the other one. "no, one they said is good for that.. With vinegar and honny.. It even says soo on the package" For someone who had his routines he sure could be spontanious when it came to things like bying tea.. Which he had done the past two times he went to the store.

"oh, that might explain alot.." Your cheeks burned as you had been drinking that one the past few days. "You have been taking this the last few days, haven't you? Thats why you have been soo tired?" Kakashi was amused, but he didn't complain. Since you had been drinking that one, there had been alot more naps, which he had also joined in on. "I might have mixed those yes...and who dosen't like honey, reminds me of those dumplings the old lady used to make each summer.. Remember?" You smiled as you remembered the old lady who used to have a small booth each summer. Obito always helped her before and after the academy day, and you always got Rin to help you drag kakashi along. "maa.. They were way too sweet.. The one time you forced one on me was enough"

"you know what they say, eat your sweets and you become sweeter than honey yourself" it was a saying your mother used too say.. An exuse to eat candy other than the weekends.. You took the honey tea from his hand and put it back on the shelf, making sure to write a mental note that this one were for nights only. "Thats your exuse everytime.. Too much of it is never good for you" You hadn't noticed how close you two were standing before you looked back at him, almost having your nose brush against his. "Maybe, wouldn't become to sweet now. Would I?" you didn't mean it to be flirtatious, but the little confidentboost just made you slip as your eyes met his.

Which one of you who closed the distance first was hard to say, but both were caught in the moment as your lips met in a sweet and soft kiss. His hand found its way to your hip, slowly pressing your bodies togheter as your hand softly found its way to his cheek. It was unexpected, yet it made your heart beat faster at the soft impact. The loud skreeching from the pot seem to be snapping you both out of the moment, and You had to catch your own breath as Kakashi removed his hand from your hip and walked over to the stove, turning it off and grabbing the pot.

The mask back on his face as usual as he poured water into the cups silently. "I'm sorry.. That should not have happened" He didn't look at you as he said it, just focusing on the cups before putting the pot away. "No, don't worry about" If it was to calm him or you were something you were unsure about. Getting caught in the moment can happen to the best..couldn't it? "I have a few things to do before your check up today.. Are you able to be alone for a bit?" You just nodded, not wanting to hold him back from his own things. "I'll be fine, I am mostly back to normal soo it shouldn't be a problem" You grabbed your teacup and smiled before walking into the livingroom. Deep down you knew that he wanted to have some time on his own, at least after what just happened..

When the appointment came, You let Tsuande take the usual testing that she needed. The little wrinke on her forhead was visable as she read throught your papers. "Everything seems good.. Most stats are back to normal" she swong her hand and gave you a way to strong pat, rather slap in the back. Forceful enough that you had to catch yourself from not falling off the chair. "Thats good, Tsunade sama.. Soo I am free to live normally now?" You had to clear your throat a bit before looking at the woman in front of you. "Yeah, I can't see why not. I will still wait with putting you on any missions for now, but you should be good enough to go back to your normal routine... And thats just in time too" Tsunade had a cheeky smile on her face as she put your documents down in your file. "Someone will be returning any minute now, and I guess you would like to be ready to greet him?"

"really? They are on their way back?" You couldn't help but smile, it had been such a long time.. Wondering how he had been, how much he had grown.. "Thank you" You gave her a polite bow before leaving the room, smile still big on your face as you walked throught the hospital corridors. "with a smile like that it must have been good news?" Kakashi was waiting outside for you, and started to walk with you. "Offcourse, everything was good and I am finally allowed to move freely again" It was meant as a little joke, but you noticed a little shift in his eye for just a secound. "and she told me that they are on the way back home." You added. That news were the biggest reasion for your smile anyway.

"I see.. I heard something about it earlier. They should be back any day now. You have missed him?" You hadn't really talked much about Naruto the past 2 and a half years... And few had even asked, which were not suprising with how most viewed him in this village. But with how Kakashi asked.. It warmed your heart." Yes, very much.. It has been a little too quiet without him around. I miss all the stories he would tell from your missions.. The places you guys went too and all that.." Your hands found their way to your pockets as you smiled. You missed how he always told the stories about the missions, and how happy he were while telling them. "The unpredictable ninja.. Wonder how much he has grown and learned on his Journey.. I think you will hear all the stories" Kakashi sounded almost happy, which made you look over at him.

"You missed him too, Kakashi?" You didn't need to ask.. It was quite noticeable on his tone that he indeed cared for the boy more than he showed.. Maybe you were just not used to hearing other than Iruka talk anything positive about him.. Unless it was the other kids offcourse. "as you said, It has been quiet.." He shrugged it off, but you could see it. He cared, even though he didn't say it out loud. The rest of the walk were silent. Just enjoying the sound of the people in the streets, and the sun for the first time in whats feel like a long time." I wanna thank you, for helping me while I recovered.." It would be wrong not to thank him at all, after all he had done the past week and a half that he really didn't need too.

"You don't have to thank me.. I was assigned too help.." You stopped him, becoming more familliar with the way he minimized himself now. He used to have a way before where he talked down on himself in a more clear manner.. But today he had it more hidden in his words.. You were catching on, little by little. " Either way I am still thankfull." A part of you wished he didn't have to go home yet. It felt comfortable and safe to have him close like that day after day. Knowing that he would most likely leave when you two get back were not something you looked forward too.

It was just how Kakashi always had been, when you think about it. He were always there when someone needed him, but never overstayed when he weren't needed. Yet he never asked for anything in return, or even much for help at all. You had let him pack his stuff in peace.. But he was quick, and almost out the door again before you were able to even sit down in your own living room. Hadn't it been for him actually stopping to say goodbye you would not have noticed at all.

[fluffychubbyrose]

Bucky x Insecure/Self Conscious Wife Reader.

Requested.

One Shot.

Warnings- Bucky may be O.C., Language, and slight slight NSFW blink and it's gone.

Sorry it isn't exactly what you requested and that it took so long but here you go hope you like it!!!

(I don't own these pictures.)

Tonight is my 1st anniversary of being married to Bucky Barnes. I managed to get out of work early today so I could pick up a new red with black lace baby doll with a matching bra and pantie set to hopefully boost my confidence up a little for tonight. I made sure that it wasn't to form fitting so that it didn't accent the new rolls, stretch marks, and bigger belly pooch I've seemed to gain since I've been eating so much fast food and junk food because of how busy I've been, and Bucky has been even busier than I am. Neither of us have had any time to sit down and eat a proper home cooked meal in forever. Let alone spend much time together.

That's the real reason why I wanted off early today so I could cook us a nice homemade meal something not sopping in grease or out of a package and I know Bucky is still uncomfortable out in public. Plus this is supposed to be our special night to spend some time together finally in what feels like forever there's no need to go out and be uncomfortable when we could have a nice night in, relax, and enjoy ourselves.

Hell I've probably seen him only a few times this week which didn't last more than 10 minutes at a time because one of us would have to rush off to our jobs or we are so exhausted from work that we just shower and go straight to bed.

That's why I gave my boss a 2 week notice that I needed to be let off early today and have a week off for vacation. I asked Bucky to do the same if he could but he didn't seem to concerned about it which hurt because this is our first anniversary but maybe he just forgot that it's this week he probably has a reminder set or something already planned.

It doesn't stop a little voice in my head saying 'He wasn't concerned because he doesn't care. He has nothing planned. He's tired of you already. Why would he want someone as big as you?' I squeeze my eyes shut and shake my head knowing that it isn't true. Bucky loves me and I love him. Though as the hours tick by and it's already 9 p.m. and he still isn't home yet, so that voice continues to whisper more and more hurtful things. So much so, that I'm losing confidence in what it says isn't true.

I double check my outfit it's a knee high black keyhole dress to show off some of my cleavage without revealing the new baby doll and undergarment set I have on underneath. I smooth my hands down my dress with nerves from waiting so long for Bucky to come home. I text him when I was preparing dinner and he said he would be home in an hour or two.

That was three hours ago so instead of focusing and fussing on why he's late I double check the table I set earlier with a navy blue table cloth, clear vase with red roses in it, and two silver candle holders with white candles in them waiting to be lit so we can have a nice dinner by candle light. I smooth out the table cloth and mess with the positions of the roses out of nerves. I pace a little worrying my bottom lip while doing so and I'm glad I went with a lip stain rather than lip stick or I would have it all over my teeth by now. I glance at the stove, the dinner I made had been placed in the oven on low so it will stay warm until he gets home since he still wasn't here by the time I finished cooking it.

I sigh losing hope that he would be home anytime soon when the clock read 10 p.m. already and he hasn't text me to let me know he's running late. So I let my hair out of the up do I had it in and sit down at the table.

I'm about to take off my heels because all the pacing I did is making my feet feel like they were going to fall off when a disgruntled and ashamed looking Bucky rushed through the front door slamming it behind him with a box of chocolates in one hand and a bouquet of flowers in the other. I jump and put my leg back down on the floor and I'm about to stand up when Bucky rushes to me saying "I'm so sorry baby girl I completely forgot." my heart lurches at that, and before I can stand up all the way he sets the gifts on the table and kisses me.

Hard. Weaving his arm around my waist while his other hand starts running through my hair. He turns leaning me against the table his body flushed with mine as I wrap my arms around his neck and tug on his hair. We break apart a few moments after with him holding me in a dipped position.

My face is burning and I'm left gasping the momentary hurt forgotten. I look up at him a bit shocked as I bring my arms down and push on him gently. He stands us back up, his arms still around me and my hands on his shoulders. "You look fucking gorgeous doll!" He says breathlessly looking me up and down.

I turn my head to the side with a small embarrassed smile on my face and his hand comes up and turns my gaze back towards his. "I mean it! Your beautiful and I love you so much doll!" His hold on me tightens and he moves so he's even closer to me like he's trying to make sure that there's absolutely no space between us.

"I know we haven't seen each other much and haven't been spending much time together but I'm going to make it up to you, I swear! I told Fury I need the week off so we can spend some much needed time together, and I'm so sorry sweetheart it's our first anniversary and I already messed it up. Steve is the one who told me it was our anniversary when he saw I was still at the tower planning for an upcoming mission. I just got caught up in it all." He says with sigh leaning his forehead on mine. He pecks my lips and give me an apologetic smile. "I rushed home but not before getting your favorite chocolates and flowers as an apology!" He says scratching the back of his neck a clear sign that he's embarrassed for forgetting our anniversary. I pull back from his embrace and look up at him holding his hands.

"You haven't messed it up, your here now that's all that matters and I love you too. Also as good as that chocolate sounds it'll have to wait and be our dessert because I made us dinner." I say bouncing a little, excited to show off the dinner I made. "I can smell it and I'm starving! Thank you for cooking for me baby girl, I swear I don't know what I ever did to deserve you. Hell I still think I don't deserve you most days. You've helped me so much to become a better man, like I used to be before all of this." He gestures to his metal arm.

"You've helped, no loved me through it all. The good, the bad, and the ugly. I can never thank you enough Y/n. I'm sorry I've been so busy and that's no excuse, it wasn't fair of me and I should have been making more time for you, to love you, and appreciate everything you do for me and that starts tonight after dinner. I'm going to make it up to you. Because there's something I want for dessert and it isn't that chocolate." He says giving me a predatory gaze making my heart beat rapidly in my chest.

My mouth goes dry and there's a lump in my throat. My face is burning and I try to subtly squeeze my thighs shut but the smirk he gives me as I move to place the flowers into the vase with the roses let's me know that he saw. Once I finished I grab the chocolates and then walk quickly into the kitchen and set them onto the counter for later, then I put my oven mitts on, just in case the plates got hot and take dinner out of the oven.

I turn around and use my foot to close the ovens door, the whole time his gaze never wandered from me. Not even when I walked over and set the plates down. "Fuck doll you made my favorite!" He groans out looking at me like he just won the lottery before sitting down. I light the candles and quickly sit down as well with a happy smile on my face.

I think we both ate much more quickly than anticipated from it being so late, and the fact that I don't think either of us can recall the last time we had an actual home cooked meal. I lean back in my chair with a happy sigh and place a hand on my over stuffed belly. Before any negative thoughts can pop up about how big or plush my belly has gotten, Bucky suddenly stands up and picks up both of our plates to go put them in the sink. He leans down towards me pecking my check and says "I'll be right back." I smile at him and he smirks in return. My nerves and insecurities are coming back full force but it's now or never as I head to our bedroom and strip out of my dress. I only get a moment to look at myself in the mirror before Bucky is in the doorway staring me down like I'm a feast laid out for a starving man. My face is burning again and I gulp nervously we haven't done anything like this in a long time, our schedules haven't allowed for it. We've been too tired or had to rush off to work.

"I love you so much." He says in a breathy moan with a dreamy look on his face, looking right into my eyes with such an intensity of both love and lust that I can't help the warm feeling spreading through my chest or how I get teary eyed and upset for doubting him or his love for me in the first place. I've been letting my insecurities get the better of me lately.

When he married me I was already a bit on the heavier side, so I should have known better that a few extra pounds or rolls wouldn't phase Bucky or even make him bat an eye on how he see's or feels about me. He proved just how much he loves me and just how beautiful he thinks my body is for the rest of the night.

@whyamihere-bro

[otakumakes]

I read somewhere once that you should have like 3-6 months worth of emergency cash. In case something was to happen to your job and you have trouble finding a new one. That's to pay bills, gas and food on--for 3 to 6 MONTHS. NOT DAYS. HALF A GD YEAR.

You should be able to take a vacation without having to come back and eat Ramen for a month to save on groceries or do so in order to save for it.

A sick day should be taken when you feel sick, not avoided because "we can't afford for me to be sick"

You shouldn't need 3 side hustles on top of your regular job just to get by, or to scrape together enough to buy yourself something you need, or heaven forbid--something frivolous you WANT!

This also goes into thing I've been told growing up but never really realized no one does, but from what I remember of being preppared

You're supposed to have a shit ton of supplies on hand at any given time in case of a disaster. Im talking dry, canned foods, water, blankets, dry clothing, flashlights, oil lamps, radios, stuff to fortify your house with against the elements etc.

And 90% of us don't realize we don't have enough.

How many of us have food to last us more than a week? And I mean real food, not snacks or stuff that we can toss in a microwave after a long ass day of work?

Have access to clean water to sustain our family for more than a day? Accessible dry clothing, blankets, a different source of electricity or heat in case our power goes out?

My husband preps in his very, very limited free time and it wasn't until we went over what we needed to prep for a car emergency pack that I realized how screwed we woulda been if he hadn't already been on top of things.

Backpacks with:

Food, extra dry clothes and shoes, water, a map, camping equipment, a way to stay a fire, a power brick for electronics, umbrella, a weather radio, flashlights, blankets etc

in case we got broken down on the side of the road and we were away from home

He saved for months and bought us a generator. It's winter for us and we got ice with a heay snow where I live. A LOT of our people had power go out. We out of people I know, our family and 2 others had a generator to run electric and heat off of to keep us warm until the electric company got the power back.

How many people sat freezing in the cold because they thought they couldn't afford a generator, or absolutely couldn't? How many had to abandon their homes to pile up with a relative that had a wood stove or a generator until the power came back on?

I live in a very poor, old coal mining county. 90% of our jobs are fast food and factory work. We can't afford to just hop over to Walmart, the shoe store or wherever and just go apeshit buying stuff to make sure all our bases are covered.

My family has been in a vacation in 3 or 4 years. My husband and I haven't done a date night in almost as long--because it's too much money to spend when there's other things we have to pay first. And it's mentally fucking exhausting!

Too many of us don't have enough blankets, camping equipment and warm clothing squirreled away. Because it's seen as frivolous. Why do you need EXTRA, isn't one enough for you?

We as a people have gotten so used to being fucked over, anything remotely sensible is seen as bougie because its "extra".

"If you got along fine before it, do you really need it?"

Yes Karl! Its called "quality of life improvement!" More than bare gd minimum doesn't make me a multi-millionare or rich!

LITERALLY some of you don’t fucking know what “disposable income is” like i cannot stress ENOUGH that someone who was able to get animal crossing on day 1 of launch or a ps5 preorder that is still only working minimum wage job and/or cannot pay their rent on a monthly basis is NOT your enemy bruv they are NOT “the rich” like PLEASE cement that in your head. 

[chasholidays]

Could you write a Bellarke fic based on Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries? I would highly recommend the show if you haven't seen it. It's about a female detective in 1920's Australia who has an adoptive daughter, a lesbian doctor best friend, and TONS of UST with the local police detective. She's also big into flaunting conventions of the time, and does whatever the hell she wants! Thank you! You are incredible!

In the grand scheme of things, Clarke knows there are much more important things to worry about than why Inspector Blake isn’t in the office one day. He’s allowed, after all, to take a day off, and his schedule doesn’t follow hers. But there is something arresting about coming in and finding his door closed and locked, no sign of him anywhere. Especially after the night they had; she’d been looking forward to checking in on him, to debriefing.

She always looks forward to seeing him, honestly.

“Where’s the inspector?” she asks one of the officers passing by. “Inspector Blake,” she clarifies, in case he’s somehow not familiar with her or her partnership with Blake.

“Inspector Blake is unwell,” says the officer. “He won’t be in today.”

Clarke frowns. “Unwell?”

The man shrugs. “I only know what I’m told. He isn’t coming in. Is there anything else I can assist you with, Miss Griffin?”

Even if he had Blake’s home address, he probably wouldn’t be able to give it to her. Clarke’s sure she has it somewhere, or she’ll be able to find it. Not that he should need her coming to play nursemaid, but she does know him fairly well by now. If he and Gina were still seeing each other, she wouldn’t worry, but left to his own devices, she’s just not convinced he’ll remember that he needs to eat even if he’s not hungry and drink more than he usually would.

If she was ill, he’d probably worry about her. It’s not unusual, for friends.

“No, thank you,” she says. “I think I have everything I need.”

*

Clarke would consider Inspector Blake to be something akin to a friend, although it might be too strong a word. They’re associates, undoubtedly, but they don’t spend time together outside of work events.

But she has his address, and it isn’t even that far to travel. She gets some soup and her favorite blend of tea and doesn’t feel nervous until she’s almost there. If he did this for her, she’d understand, but she would think it was–profound. It would be a sign of something.

If he thinks the same thing, he’ll be right, of course. But she does try to be a little less blatant. Ambiguity is the name of her game.

Still, she’s already most of the way to him. And she’d like to make sure he’s well.

She rings the doorbell and waits, shifting a little. Maybe the officer was wrong. Maybe he’s playing hooky. It doesn’t seem like Inspector Blake, but–

The door flies open and there he is, frowning in a hastily tied dressing gown. She’s never seen him looking so ragged, hair in disarray, cheeks rough with stubble, eyeglasses askew.

“Miss Griffin,” he says, straightening the glasses. “What are you–”

She holds up her packages. “I heard you were ill.”

“And you decided the correct response was to come calling, obviously.” He rubs his face. “What did you bring?”

“Soup and tea. I’m not confident in your ability to take care of yourself.”

“You’re not confident in me?” he asks. “You’ve dragged yourself to investigate cases when I would have known well enough to–” The sentence is lost in a fit of coughs, and Clarke pushes him inside with a frown.

“That was because we had a case. You can’t have gotten this bad in a day, so you must have been working yesterday despite feeling poorly.”

“Not this poorly.” His eyes dart over her, and she refuses to let herself flush. “You didn’t have to come all the way out here.”

“It’s not that far from me.”

“No?”

“Don’t pretend you don’t know where I live, Inspector.”

He shrugs one shoulder. “I assume you went to the station looking for me and had to come all the way back, or you wouldn’t have known to come out here. Can I get you something to drink? Coffee? Tea?”

“You don’t have to entertain me, you’re sick. Tell me where your kettle is and I’ll make you some of the tea I brought. My mother swears by it to cure all ills.”

“You brought me tea?” he asks, sounding suspicious, as if this is some clear sign of danger.

“Is that a problem?”

“You didn’t have to do this.”

“I know. I was worried,” she admits. “We had a rough night last night, I wanted to make sure you weren’t hurt.”

“I’m sure it didn’t help with the bug, but it is just a bug.”

“A bad enough bug you took the day off.”

“I didn’t want it to get worse.”

“Then you should sit down and let me make you some of this tea. Have you eaten? Do you want soup?”

“This is a new side of you, Miss Griffin. I think I liked the old one better.”

But he lets her take over his kitchen, and she makes him some tea and starts the soup warming on the stove, and then it becomes uncomfortable, because she doesn’t have anything to say to him, not really. She’s never called on him at home before.

He’s the one to finally ask, “Was there another murder already?”

“What?”

“Is that why you’re so determined to see me?”

“No. It’s not possible I was just worried over your health?”

“It’s possible,” he grants, with an odd tone to his voice. “You don’t have to be. I can take care of myself.”

“I didn’t have any evidence of that, so I thought I should investigate for myself before making any assumptions.”

He snorts, but it turns into coughing again, and Clarke actually gets up to rub his back before she’s quite thought the decision through. It brings her entirely too close to him, warmth radiating off his side, and if there wasn’t entirely too much of it, she might be distracted.

“Are you running a fever?” she demands, putting her hand on his forehead.

“I am sick,” he points out. “You were warned.”

“You shouldn’t have come out yesterday.”

“I was concerned you’d die unsupervised.”

“And now I’m concerned about the same thing. You should be in bed. You know you don’t have to stand on ceremony with me. Do you need anything? Can I run any errands for you?”

“I think I can survive a day.”

“I think it’s going to be more than a day. Don’t argue,” she adds, when he starts to. “My mother and my best friend are both doctors, you’ll recall. I’m the expert here, Bellamy.”

The use of his Christian name is deliberate, a tactic she’s never tried before, and he startles at it as if he’s been shocked.

“Take the day,“ she goes on, before he can respond. "They’ll survive without you. And if you go in, you’ll just get everyone sick. I’ll come by in the morning to check on you.”

“Will you?” he asks, very nearly a challenge.

“Do you have anyone else doing it?”

“I’m sure my sister would if I asked her.”

“But you aren’t going to ask her.”

He sighs, all the fight going out of him at once. “She’d be awful at it anyway.”

“So I’ll come. If you give me a key, you don’t even have to drag yourself out of bed to let me in.”

“I think being forced to move once or twice a day is good for me.” He wets his lips, his eyes intense on her. “Thank you, Clarke.”

It shouldn’t make her breath stop, it shouldn’t make her heart pound faster. She started it, after all. But all she wants is to stay, to fret over him until he’s feeling better, and once he is—

Well, she’s always known what she wants to do with him. But it’s getting harder and harder to pretend it’s simply lust. She’ll never have enough of him, she’s quite sure of that. She wants to be with him every morning and every night, to not have to come over to check in on him because she’ll already be here, their lives all wrapped up together.

It’s something to think about later, when he’s well and she isn’t so discombobulated from being in his home. When her mind is clear.

"You’re welcome,” she says, with a smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

*

It takes a few days for him to recover, although Clarke’s sure that if she wasn’t checking in on him, he’d try to drag himself back to work much sooner. But Bellamy works too hard and always has, and Clarke can’t help thinking a long break is good for him. Especially when it doesn’t seem to be anything life-threatening. She thinks about making him go out to see Lexa, just for a checkup, but she knows exactly what her friend would say: he needs rest and fluids and doesn’t need all the hassle of leaving his house to come here so I can tell him to stay in bed.

On the fourth day of his illness, Bellamy opens the door for her fully dressed and shaved, and says, “I made lunch.”

Clarke blinks. “You did?”

“It’s the first part of my plan to convince you I’m well again.”

“How many parts does this plan have?”

“As many as it needs to work.” He holds the door open for her. “I’m not fully recovered, but I’m recovered enough. I think I can go in for the second half of the day and get caught up on all the work I’ve missed.”

“Bellamy–”

“I’ll take it easy,” he says, before she can argue. “Half a day won’t kill me. And I’m feeling well enough to be bored.”

“Of course you are. What did you make for lunch?”

It’s a very dangerous thing, being at Bellamy’s when he’s feeling well. He always felt like himself, but he really is much better now, and he’s made a delicious meal, and he wants to hear about what’s going on with the precinct, since she’s been visiting, but once that’s done, they just chat. It’s their first time being so easy together, shed of professional responsibilities, and it’s tantalizing, a glimpse of what she might have, if he wants it too.

If they can ever talk about it.

“So, do I pass inspection?” he asks, once they’re done.

“The fact that you can cook doesn’t prove you’re well.”

“I assume that means you can’t think of a counterargument,” he teases, and she scowls at him.

“I’m so sorry for being worried about your health.”

His eyes go soft. “I do appreciate it. But I’m fine, Clarke. And it’s not as if you won’t see me again to make sure I’m not overexerting myself. I’m sure you’ll trip over another dead body sooner or later.”

It’s true, but not exactly comforting. After four days of seeing him every day, of relaxed, non-professional interaction, it’s going to be hard to go back to seeing him only when she has official business.

“Sooner or later,” she agrees. “If you want to go back, I won’t stop you. You’re the best judge of your own health. Thank you for lunch.”

“Thank you for looking after me. I might not always show it, but I did appreciate it.”

“You’re a terrible patient,” she says, with a smile, and forces herself to add, “Inspector.” It’s going to raise eyebrows, if she’s too familiar with him back at work.

His tongue darts out to wet his lips, and his eyes search hers for a second. “Are we going back to that?”

“Are we not?”

He takes a step in, still not close, but closer, close enough to mean something. “I don’t want to. Clarke, you have to know I–”

She pulls him down roughly, and he catches her face right before impact, smiling as their lips meet, tempering the kiss from hard desperation into something lighter and sweeter. His mouth is warm, flavored faintly with lunch and coffee, and his fingers are callused but gentle on her jaw.

She manages to restrain herself for all of ten seconds before she slides her tongue against his, and he groans and pulls her closer, and she manages to navigate them back to his sofa without breaking the contact.

“You’re still recovering, we should sit,” she murmurs, breathless, between kisses, and he laughs, sliding his hands up her sides.

“Your concern for my health is commendable, Miss Griffin.”

“You’re right, we shouldn’t do that too often,” she says. His mouth finds her neck, and she gasps. “Bellamy–”

“Clarke.”

“I really think you shouldn’t go back to work this afternoon,” she says, pulling his mouth back to hers. “Just to be safe.”

He grins at her, glasses askew, hair a mess, but eyes clear and smile bright, everything she hoped for. “Maybe you’re right. But I’m going to need something to keep me busy.”

“I’m sure we can come up with something.”

His fingers slide between the layers of her clothing, finding bare skin, and she shivers closer. “I have a few ideas.”

*

It’s another week before she has reason to go into the precinct, although she’s seen him almost every day and spent more nights in his bed than in her own. This early period of relationships is always a little warm and giddy, but Clarke can’t help thinking this really is different, too. That it really will last.

“Inspector Blake,” she says, perching herself on his desk, as always.

“Miss Griffin.”

“Welcome back, you were very much missed here. I hope you’re feeling better.”

“Much,” he says, a smile playing on his lips. “It’s safe to say I haven’t felt this good in years.”

[inactiat-writes]

[WP] "The light can never go out," explained the old lighthouse operator. "Ships don't need us. Haven't in quite some time. It's the people here on land who'll suffer if that light ever goes out."

Original post here.

After days of sifting through the belongings her papa didn't need anymore, the new lighthouse keeper crept upstairs to watch the last bit of hope be extinguished. There was no need for it anymore. Her papa had owned the deed on the land, but it was the town who paid for the light.

The mayor had decided to put the funds set aside for upkeep of the lighthouse into a pay raise for the teachers. It was supposed to honor her papa who had led the teacher's union for years and had been teaching up until the day he'd died.

Ana hadn't been able to sell the land, although her daughter and son-in-law had tried to convince her otherwise. It was her childhood home and she traveled so much for work that it didn't feel like it mattered where she called home.

People who knew a lot more than her about lighthouses came and fiddled with a panel. She heard deep, mechanical clicks that sounded more like the solemn tone of a bell. Then, they bid her good day and left with their tools.

She put her hand on the cool glass and wondered why her papa had insisted that the light was not for ships, but for the town. She smiled when she lifted her hand away and didn't see any dust or smudges besides her own handprint.

She went back downstairs to continue wiping at her eyes as she went through old photo albums and tried not to get anything important dirty with grease from a pizza one of the people in town had gotten delivered to her.

The next morning, Ana woke up to stillness. It seemed to be so sombre, fog rolling in from the ocean in the cool morning. The sky was still dark, but light was starting to come in. She made herself a cup of coffee and gazed out onto the ocean, listening to the crash of waves against the cliffside.

She closed her eyes and smiled at the familiar smell of ocean breeze. After a moment, she cracked one eye open and realized something was wrong. She hadn't heard a single gull screaming about the sun.

She blinked and scanned the horizon as if she thought she'd spot any. It was then that she realized the sky was still pitch black.

A glance at the clock on the stove told her it was 9:42 am. Before Ana could process this, she heard a deep, rumbling click and then a siren began wailing in the town below.

She quickly wrapped herself up in a house robe and kicked on a pair of slippers. As she grabbed the handle of the front door, she heard a hissing and popping sound from right outside that made her stop. On edge, she waited for it to stop, but it only devolved into what sounded like a man coughing.

Ana looked around the room for a baseball bat or anything she can use as a weapon. Deep in her gut was the feeling that she should have something to defend herself with. Mounted on the mantle was an old flail next to her family crest. She pried it off the wall and went to answer the door, hefting the heavy flail into a position she hoped would let gravity do most of the work.

It was a man in a suit.

Ana blinked for a moment at him, not quite sure what she'd been expecting. She started to feel embarrassment rise when the man suddenly smiled too wide, too big and started to speak, "Ana Connswell, the new lighthouse keeper. I am here to give you a very special offer, any wish you--"

The flail hit his head with a satisfying crack before Ana let herself think too much about it.

His skull caved and Ana was jerked forward by the momentum. After a bit of tugging and sickening squelching, she was fully upright again. Four other men glared at her.

The biggest stepped forward menacingly, his steps burning the grass and melting a plastic frog, "You fool. You would have been granted anything. Now, we, the servants of--"

A louder crack and a metallic thunk as the sidewise swipe smashed the man into the side of the lighthouse. It was easier to pull back this time. Ana frowned at the three remaining... men? Demons? Horrors? She didn't know, but after having an English teacher for a father, the cold stare she sent their way had them glancing between themselves nervously.

She stepped back into the lighthouse and closed the door. After a pause, she also slid the deadbolt in place. She let herself put the flail down for a moment to still her shaking hands and then was off, up the narrow lighthouse steps to the top.

With the 360 degree view, she could see the chaos raging in the town below. Creatures chasing the dots of civilians and fires ravaging homes while sirens still cried under the black sky.

Ana knew it didn't take a genius to follow a simple chain of events.

She'd watch them undo the lighthouse yesterday, so she just worked the switches in the reverse sequence. Each click gave that deep tone, but seemed to shake the ground with it. With every step closer, the ground shook more violently.

As the light finally flared to life, the black sky seemed to edge away. The sirens still wailed and, as Ana made her way to look down at the town, fires still raged.

Yet, the new lighthouse keeper learned a very important first lesson: When you die in that place, you don't die in real life. You can, however, be horribly traumatized.

Later that day, she would learn her second lesson: Lighthouses don't work if the town's transformer gets blown up in a fire. However, lighthouses accept blood sacrifices as a form of power and aren't really picky about if the blood is human or not.