#theyre pondering yay

[cyberdragoninfinity]

Hello, I've been enjoying your Arc-V reactions so much. I had a question since you called Yuya your favorite protagonist, do you have some like deeper character analysis thoughts on him? I feel like I had a strong grasp of his character in season 1, but in seasons 2 and 3 I don't think I understood well what the writers were going for with him, other than he's extremely repressed because both parents told him he's never allowed to get angry or cry and express any negative emotions.

WAH THANK YOU apologies this took ten thousand years to get to..late june/july is always busy for my art fightin' ass

ANYWAY IVE BEEN HMMING AND PONDERING OVER THIS FOR A WHILE and like. i think the tricky thing with yuya is that, well, i don't think the WRITERS even fully had a grasp on what they wanted to go for with him in the later seasons (and/or what they wanted to do with arc-v's themes. and the plot. and the all of it lmao) so it really is a bit of a 'there's multiple reads you can have on this character and while not all of 'em are right, not all of 'em are probably wrong either'; the narrative frankly doesn't have a strong enough backbone for like the entire second half to put full conviction into one definite read. Great news for guys who like to think way too much about yugioh characters!! Less great news for "trying to actually grasp wtf the actual honest to god true intent of the writing was" 🥴

All that on the table and now aside, let's talk about the little unwell tomato of the hour. First I do think it's a bit misleading to say Yuya's especially repressed, per say--there's an element of unconscious ignoring/avoidance to repression, and let's be real this kid is certainly not ignoring his negative emotions. The negative emotions are beating his ass. He is spending half the series having catastrophic emotional meltdowns and veering directly into sobs and explosive rage outbursts and feeling Bad almost constantly. I think with him it's more an instance of him having just an absolute pisspoor handling on his emotional regulation... because yeah his parents have been giving him terrible self-help advice for years </3

I don't think theyve necessarily told him he's not allowed to be sad/get angry/express negative emotions--instead it's more of a case where (with Yusho especially) Yuya's being told if he DOES feel sad or upset, then that needs to be met with a smile in order to truly push past it and to feel better, i.e. if you fake the laughter then it will become genuine laughter and youll be a-ok and HAPPY!! YAY HAPPY ^_^ (yusho you cant fucking say that to your coughing baby who's also a hydrogen bomb!!!! oh god!!!!)

arc-v is Very into this idea of illustration emotions as through the metaphor of a pendulum (huh wonder why) especially like.... 'when you're crying, laugh instead, and that will swing your emotions back around again into positive ones' and 'if you're courageous and confident and push through feeling upset, that courage will swing back and turn into happiness.' which is like... IT'S ALMOST SOMETHING. THEYRE ALMOST SAYING SOMETHING MEANINGFUL. BUT YUYA IS SUCH A BAD MAIN CHARACTER TO EMBODY THIS THEMATIC CONCEPT. he's neurotic and kind of not particularly brave and wretchedly insecure and again his emotional regulation is complete dogwater and he's not a very good, confident duelist (or showman even) and so on and so forth. And the problem I think is as you get into season 2 and 3 the stakes keep getting higher and urgent but Yuya doesn't really like.... Grow very much in those aforementioned areas. They just start piling more and more insane shit on him and then it's not just his dad telling him to smile more but also like half the rest of the cast and the narrative itself BUT THERE NEVER GETS TO BE A MOMENT WHERE LIKE. THAT MANTRA FEELS EARNED, FOR YUYA. The writers reeeeally really want him to be this embodiment of laughter and always swinging back around to smile in the face of adversity but most of the moments we see them trying to make Yuya out to be this in the show, where his dueling brings smiles to everyone and ends classism and makes the bad guys nice immediately, they just feel kind of....fake. ive mentioned before how the end of arc-v feels like a fake tumblr post but alongside that a lot of season 2/3's writing for yuya feels like the exaggerated parody of steven universe that su critical blogs in 2015 were convincing themselves existed. and don't get me wrong it's fucking hysterical, I think it's hilarious yuya fixed arc-v aster in like two duels and now he's not an authoritarian child soldier anymore, but we do have to also Be So Serious.

sorry i just needed to post CHILL OUT ON THE GLOOM AND DOOM :/ again. this aster definitely has killed people but it's fine yuya fixed him. he's fine.

IMO It's hard to get a grasp on/understand Yuya's character in the later half of the series cuz yuya's character is so weighed down with these big idealistic themes the show didn't actually put any work towards getting him on a narratively satisfying track to fulfill them. He spends like 2/3s of season two literally locked in rooms astral projecting every so often like COME ON. and season 3 much like a lot of arc-v ALMOST GETS THERE. ALMOST SAYS SOMETHING, WITH YURI AND WITH ZARC. What happens when someone's happiness comes about from pain and violence? What happens when a smile is full of malice? That could be such a cool opportunity to explore the pitfalls of the pendulum emotion metaphor the show sets up, how that can be twisted into something harmful, but. well. that's not what we got huh :,)

anyway all that to say i think yuya's a sweet kid who has such a genuinely big heart and is a really interesting character, but it's almost this sort of key feature of his that he's really not a terribly happy person despite the smiley emoji-shaped hole the show's plot tries to jam him into (and cuz of that there's just so much dissonance in that that makes his whole deal kind of murky when all is said and done.) he's really a character that just has nonstop shit Happening to him whether he wants it to or not and it's kind of insane how little agency he has for like... So Much of the Show. He's made into a mouthpiece for Smile Away Da Pain and like.... for what? [arc-v spoilers if it matters] at the end of the series the other three yuboys are effectively dead and soul-absorbed and don't come back and it's like. you cant Smile World that loss away, arc-v. yknow?

i have no idea what my point was anymore, it is very late haha. LOVE YUYA. THEY COULD HAVE SAID SOME REALLY THOUGHT PROVOKING SHIT WITH HIM. AND YET !

[midwestgp]

💌 for me, please?

of course gio!!!! id love to!!!

mutuals send me a 💌 so i can tell u i adore u

i dont think ive ever told you this but before i joined f1blr and the princess george server i was like obsessed with your blog. your edits and gifs and your takes were so cool and based… it took me so long to finally join the server and start posting here but your blog was the main reason i did it! i pondered doing it for a longgggg time because i was just like “gahhhh but theyre so cool…. aough…” but yeah! you were the main reason i started making stuff on f1blr! so thank you!!!!!

anyways lets talk your gifs… you make the most glossy shiny smooth chrome-like diamond-like gifs ever…. like the daft punk gif for your other blog…. AAAOOOUGHHHH!!! the shines are so bright!! they move so smooth!! your taste in music is fantastic!! you just colored it PERFECTLY.

although we havent had the chance to chat much you have always been so kind-hearted and a joy to hear from.

yay!! thanks for the 💌!

[lemontongues]

im continuing to ponder, meandering journal entry about gender below the cut lol

like idk i know i have a bit of a weird relationship to gender, in that i feel very firmly agender, like just. really very little connection whatsoever to being a woman or a man, but i do strongly prefer feminine things and i really like stories about people relating positively to their own femininity? like, stuff about gender euphoric trans women, or lesbians really reveling in "teehee we're girls :)" or just. people coming to value the trappings of femininity and how it can make you feel, despite like. really not going very far out of my way to present femininely in my actual life. i dont shave/wear makeup/etc, i used to have a buzzcut and may very well go back to it at some point, so on and so forth. but i do really like high heels and lingerie and pretty pastel colors and things of that nature..... so i have this weird distant-but-admiring relationship with being feminine, and i present pretty feminine rn for a variety of laziness-related reasons, and i do feel (and always have felt) some of the social pressures of womanhood, and i have no real relationship to or desire for masculinity lol

but in media stuff soooo much of the time i just. prefer stories about dudes. idk what it is! i like women having positive relationships with each other, but when its just one lone woman i dont rly care, or if its like, women who are struggling against each other im only interested in it if its like. theres a chance for them to grow and come to understand/support each other. like cassierose is good imo bc i genuinely think it could go from like glorious violent attraction to like. actually Getting each other and growing as ppl. but like stephcass and cissiecassie dont rly do much for me bc i feel like usually its just presented as "theyre friends so they should kiss :)" which is totally fine OBVIOUSLY but it doesnt. fulfill any deeper longing in me. idk.

but honestly i think thats true with all of my shipping so maybe the issue rly is just the media i consume? like. i dont feel like a lot of the time the relationships between women are as deep and gut-wrenching as the ones between dudes lol, even when theres actual lesbians or whatever it just feels more. shallow a lot of the time. they get along! they dont like each other! and okay but like why yknow?? like. okay back in the haikyuu days kiyoyachi was good bc it was like. yeah i know what they feel about each other lol? yachi admires kiyoko for being a beautiful and put together slightly older girl, and kiyoko feels warm and protective towards yachi as a fellow girl in a male-dominated space and a very earnest and enthusiastic person. so i can work with that!! vs like, stephcass (sorry to pick on it its just the first example im thinking of) is like. yeah theyre friends :) bc theyre...... girls. :) so it doesnt rly feel meaningful to me in any way lol

okay honestly i feel like that might be it lol, which. makes me feel better. like when i make my ocs i know they have personal depth and complex relationships with each other so i gravitate towards girls, but in media a lot of the time the more complex and emotional narratives are for/between men, and women are just kinda. hanging out. so that makes sense. okay i think im not being sexist lmao yay

[secretcircuit]

6, 8, 16, 19, 20, 25, 28, and 30!

YAY thank u !!

6. Anything that might inspire you subconsciously (i.e. this horse wasn’t supposed to look like the Last Unicorn but I see it)

this is tricky for me to answer! i feel like my artistic inspirations are things that i know (im curious what other ppl think they are...) for the most part... so i guess i dont know if i have an answer for this ! maybe other ppl do?? one time i drew a portrait of myself that looked like a wikihow illustration skdfjskfjskdjf but that was an accident

8. What’s an old project idea that you’ve lost interest in

so i started to answer this but then realized im still interested in that project skdjfksj ... ooh i know ! i used to draw this character (unnamed) with a computer monitor for a head and a human body -- because at the time i felt like people understood me to be a machine or robot-like when in fact i had a lot of feelings... so it was going to be a comic about them navigating through life with this huge disconnect... thankfully i have friends now who dont make me feel like that, so i dont feel the need to revisit it :')

(also side note i feel like ive seen comics / manga (or something?) with a design just like this since ???)

16. Something you are good at but don’t really have fun doing

this is making me realize that i like most of the things im good at, which makes me wonder if maybe i shy away from doing things im NOT good at (even if i dont like them)? i will have to ponder... i mean i guess i am passably good at drawing Mechanically Complex(ish) Things (e.g. bicycles or w/e) but find them really boring. im not interested in things that are symmetrical or engineered... (computers dont count; they are just lil boxes visually)

19. Favorite inanimate objects to draw (food, nature, etc.)

OOH so many things... i love drawing botanical stuff. i dont actually post much of it on here i guess? but i do a LOT of plant studies / drawings for people :) not to sound like a jock but i also really like drawing sports equipment?? it's fun in general and also when i draw it on people it helps with posing etc. skateboards, hockey sticks, that sort of thing. i do also enjoy drawing computers. and like... i guess they arent Objects but i like drawing interiors in general... trying to make spaces lived in etc. oh furniture is kinda fun to do... but yeah plants / botanicals are at the top of the list :)

20. Something everyone else finds hard to draw but you enjoy

people often remark that they find it hard to hatch/crosshatch the way i do? but it's just how i shade, and i like it; it's fun to do... people in motion ? hands? (dont get me wrong i also find them hard to draw but i do enjoy them.)

25. Something your art has been compared to that you were NOT inspired by

AHA well one time i posted a fanart piece of kakashi that i had done in acrylics as my fb profile picture (LOL... like we are talking 10-min study, not an actual polished piece) and someone said it looked like van gogh which ... was very funny to me? especially bc i dont feel like my style is similar to van gogh's otherwise. (and we are talking like - family friend commenting on fb. so.) ive also had ppl say that my art reminds them of alison bechdel's (which i consider to be a compliment; i love her comic style), but i had already pretty much solidified my style before reading dtwof so...

28. Any art events you have participated in the past (like zines)

i have never participated in a zine! i used to do inktober before the creator of it revealed himself 2 be super shitty. honestly the main reason i dont do zines is that i do exclusively traditional art and im lazy and dont feel like going 2 the effort of scanning / editing / etc... but also i would really like to? ive also thought about making my own zines, but thats not really an Event. i did in fact make one abt vampires... anyway

30. What piece of yours do you think is underrated

one of the orufrey pieces i did where theyre like abt to kiss after hours in the atelier... LISTEN. i used to dislike doing backgrounds but i put a lot of work into that one! i literally referenced how the couch looks based on the handful of manga chapters where it shows up!!!!!! i will live tho. honestly i have been pleasantly surprised with how much some of my art has been shared on here :')

art asks

[fax-mach1n3]

Reactions to AWAE 3x07

- here comes anne to make a mess - god im so anxious

- for better or WORSE - diana what a save - the awkwardness i cant - god ms stacey, you poor soul - i hate her parents, literally the worst - like what kind of mother reacts like that to "he hurt me" - Rachel Lynde secret feminist?? - matthew is the only man i trust - oof moody you dumb bitch - gilbert reading her article like that is the best shirbert moment to date - THAT SMILE WHEN SHE COMES IN - me thinking the Derry ship was safe.... puts on more clown makeup - poor Jerry, i love him - yaaas josie you tell him, redemption for josie not billy! - no don't kill the female friendship - OOF DIANA - NOOOOO - YAAS ANNE GO OFF - NOOOO - who am i cheering for here - ohh jeez - pls fix this moira i can't handle this - Prissy is a hero - Jane eww - matthew! - yay josie! - yay kids! - GILBERT - talk to gil talk to gil talk to gil - ayyyyyyyyyyy - "we did"! - oh lord the tender - "DO YOU WANNA START" - the spelling - the gaze - WINNIFRED IS A LUCKY GAL - bitch im so hype for next week - r e s o l u t i o n - that's right gilbert, ponder all your life's decisions - no - theyre stealing it - those dicks - FUCK - the schools gonna burn down - JESUS MOIRA

- really had me in the first half ngl

[thomasisnotasimp]

3.11.2022

so first going into this the only thing ontop of my mind is that this is probably going to be quite inconsistent.

anyway what i wanted to say i already forgot, i mean i always have so many good ideas like pondering such things in our realitity trying to figure out how everything works just out of curiosity but i always seem to get lost into my own toughts and then drown into the anxiety of okay i forgot it was something about productivity.

so first of all once again listen to the oozes, theyre great. i think i was going to type something about how ive always wanted to keep a diary and type my thoughts out like this yet not revealing too much so i dont get lost into the puzzles of my own mind.

oh and other thing i wanted to talk about is that tumblr is a place i can be cringe, no? so i can type my thoughts out for no one to read into the universe of the internet pretending someone gives a shit withouth acutally gaining any popularity and just chilling down here?

okay well ill probably type later here and also i like drawing and stuff and yk yk i like typing eith this cool keyboard its so clicky my mentally ill brain goes yay everytime i hear that click so ill just keep typing oh and also listen to rio romeo anyway heres some hastaghs that arent realated

wait how do i type a hastag