#theyre like if we were all kids on a playground and they ran in with flamethrowers chasing other kids and burning down trees

[thedisablednaturalist]

I don't think rich people should get to play with their toys if their toys are using up the carbon emissions of entire cities (and countries!) and wreaking havoc on the earth that we all share.

[krismckrismckris]

silly school stories bc theyre off topic and i want to share them but i dont have an excuse to

in 4th grade i became friends with this one kid who seemed nice, until recess time when i was playing on the swings and she was talking to me, some of my other friends came up and asked if i wanted to play with them, she immediately yelled at them and started saying things like shes my only friend and i cant have any other friends, i tried stopping her but they kept cutting me off until the next day whe i confronted her abt it, she called me an "ugly idiot", so i told the teacher and she didnt get her 4 skittles of the day lmao

one time we were watching a movie with all the 3rd grade classes, and this one boy asked if i could be his friend, i ignored him until i got annoyed and said yes just to shut him up, then a couple seconds later the teacher pauses the movie, and calls out the boy next to me, his friend was next to him and called him out by saying that he was trying to touch my butt?? he got moved so he wouldnt be a distraction then after class the teacher picked us up and said "[my name] i heard you were a hot tamale" and i stayed quiet for the rest of the school day

in 3rd grade i had a boy confess to me on the playground, on those monkey bars whatever you call them idk, what did i do? i ran around the playground, told my friends, told his friends, one of his friends told the TEACHER, so now the whole GRADE knows, then, i used his crush on me to manipulate him into doing stuff for me, like telling me his secrets and making fun of him for his crush

this is related to the last story just a year later, a year later, in 4th grade, we got put in separate classes, but, who did i get in a class with? his best friend, and i wish i was making this up but his best friend kept getting closer and closer to me as the year went on, whenever we got to choose our partners, we were together, whenever we got to choose our seats, we were together, and honestly he was a good friend

these are just little things i wanna tell others but it also never comes up but its not a story:

i stole a dinosaur toy in kindergarten

my kindergarten class had a fight over "the" and "the"

when i was in kindergarten i scolded a boy for liking my pink shoes bc they were only for girls apparently, I WAS RAISED UNDER THE IMPRESSION THAT BOYS LIKED BLUE AND GIRLS LIKED PINK IM NOT SEXIST I SWEAR

uhh TW for puke/vomit/whatever tf its called

my sister puked in my hair when i was a kid, i had to take a 2 hour shower just to get it out, ofc with my dads help since i was 4-6 and my mom was helping my sister

idk how to use tw but puke/vomit/whatever tf its called can apparently trigger ppl and idk if it applies to text but im doing it just in case, i dont want to harm anyone i swear

[demigodgooglesearches]

"too young to be a 90s kid but close" (aka 00s kid) aesthetic:

-nyan cat, llams with hats

-owls. everybody loves owls--

-minecraft before the jungle biome. minecraft hunger game servers.

-slap bracelets

-long sleves under tank tops...jean skirts with... leggings.... dc shoes... shell shoes...

those 60 seconds multiplication tables. the big blocks with 100 squares, but the strips of ten squares, the single squares? also shape wooden blocks. yellow hexagons, green triangles, blue diamonds, youd make pictures with them.

-morning circle. playing 7 up at school. FOUR CORNERS

-u knew the cookout was lit when they had huggies those juice barrel drinks that u bite the top foil

-sillybands

-nintendogs on your grey ds plus cooking mama

-remembering vaguely having to use a cd player as a kid, then an mp3, than an ipod-

-zebra. print. everything.

-japanese erasers

-duct tape purses

-the justin bieber sounds like a girl debate

-yo danny phantom hE wAS JUST 14

-shark boy and lava girl. sky high. stewart little. minutemen. halloweentown. the thirteenth year (mermaid). smart house. spy kids. twitches. princess protection program (bonus points if you watched it live and counted how many times they said princess). lemonade mouth.

-staying up late enough to see george lopez start to play

- "mom how do you spell cartoonnetwork whats the website"

- that weird fosters home for imaginary friends mmo

- fucking TOONTOWN

- "disney!! three six five!!!!!"

- microsoft paint created MASTERPIECES

- was... was kidpix a thing

-bill nye the science guy and liberty kids

-alvin and the chipmunks covers.

- school store! get me a pencil grip for a quarter.

-crimp your hair bitch... or straighten it. or clip in feathers. or strands of dye-

-bakugan and tech decks

-wheezers 'beverly hills' on the playground. we will rock you on the bus.

-camp rock. highschool musical. epic disney crossovers.

-if you didnt have a blog on blogspot.com you weren't shit (with the extension where you could feed the fish)

-lisa frank folders or those folders with close up of dogs and cat faces

-having to learn the fucking recorder. hot crossed buns... hOt croSssED BUNS,,,,

-did anyone play that weird wizard typing quest

-SMENCILS

-clUb PENGUIN. wizard 101. pirates of the carribean online. webkinz.

-everything is not what it seems when u can get all you wanted in ur wildest dreams

-popular snacks at snack time,,,: gritz, gogurt, fruit roll ups tongue tattoos, zebra cakes, cheese dip crackers, those cookie crackers where u took the red stick and spread it... gushers

-in the wee hours of the night you could hear... hear the chia pets taunting you

-orbeez. monster gummies. hotwheels beat that. fur real friends. pillow pets. littlest pet shop. yugioh. bop it. floam. tamagotchis.

-iDog

-HAVING THE KICKASS SCOOTER THENN KNOCKING UR FUCKING KNEES OFF WITH IT FUCK THAT SHIT

- "HERE I AM IN UR LIFE... HERE U ARE IN MINE... YEAH WE GOT THE SWEET LIFE... MOSTT OF THE TIME"

-underdog. undeRDOG. UNDERDOG!

-when you were playing on the ps2 and u fucking lost the fucking MEMORY CARD

-SPYRO

-playing gta the one where the guy wears the blue shirt (liberty city? ) with the sound off... memorizing cheat codes... square circle square-

-the fucking wii... making miis for literally everyone in ur class and sending the ones you didnt like to the parade

-slap slap slap... clap clap clap... SLAP SLAP SLAP.... CLAP CLAP CLAP (i.e 3... 2... 1... BLAST OFF from here to the stars,)

-when the teacher rolled out the elmo projector and those transparent plastic papers

-megan, MEGAN! (i.e i ran over oprah.....)

-the dell computers took over

-bruh message me on msn... then skype

-making a facebook page. liking all the fucking dumb facebook pages you could

-pokemon

-Z̵͖͂Ô̶̘Ö̴͔́. ̵͉͊Z̷̭̊O̷̻͒Ô̸̟ ̴̛̞Z̸̭̕Ȏ̸̗O̴͎̊ ̴̡͑. P̵̧̈Ȃ̷͖L̴̞̚S̶̰̐

-okay those weird ass beads u always got for Christmas that you had to iron to make shapes

-the fortune tellers... pick a color... blue? okay b-l-u-e. OK now pick a number... ok ur gonna marry lindsay lohan and have 80 kids

-WHAT YHR FUCK ARE THOSE GHOST THEMED CEREALS CALLED??? BOOBERRY??? AH SHIT

-team edward vs team jacob determined your survival

-thE yEar tHree THOusAnD

-black eyed peas

-fucking angry birds and flappy bird murdered everyone

-HEELYS OH DEAR GOD HEELYS I ALMOST FELL AND SLIPPED INTO ANOTHER DIMENSION

-that rabits game... let them go to the moon

-THE PS2 SOUND UP NOISE. THE DOOOOOOOSH

-every dvd had that coming soon bullshit

-stealing ur cousins gameboy

-Sugar. Spice. And everything nice.

-that fucking monkey at some of some fucking tv shows what the fuck was that fucking- hi im paul,,

-asdf videos! (desmond the moon bear.. i like trians)

-if you didnt flip ur shit everytime u saw a yellow car and yell BUMBLEBEE

-when the phone rings in school "THE PHONE... THE PHONE IS RI N G ING"

-"WAZZZZUUPPP!!" "WHAZZAAAAHHP!!"

-kidz bop. wholet the dogs out... who who? who?

-We all want to forget .... annoying orange and fred but god wont let us..

-MY SHINY Teeth and ME.

-that weird ass spongebob half time episode where theyre in the dome... or the spongebob episode with wormy... or the spongebob episode with the hooks (dont touch the hooks) or david hasslehof in the spongebob movie...

-invader zim

-FLAPJACK THAT FUCKING NIGHTMARE SHOW. And chowder. Coraline gave me NIGHTMARES fuck!

- I LIke to move it move it...

-POPTROPICA

-where the sidewalk ends from the school library... with goosebumps and diary of a whimpy kid.. BOOK FAIRS

-leapfrog

-THOSE GYM SCOOTERS. FOUR SQUARE. KICKBALL. THE PARACHUTE THING.

-no one knew how to use a fucking green screen

-🎶 we the peoplee... in order to form a more perfect union...🎶 conjunction junction whats ur function 🎶 puff the magic dragon 🎶

THERES A HUNDRED AND FOUR DAYS OF SUMMER VACATION-

the original teen titans

teach me how to dougie. soldier boy. the hoedown throwdown. the hannah montana movie 3d they were giving 3d glasses away literally in walmart

bILLY MAYS AND SHAMWOW

[rqs902]

.

enyu’s mom calls him "公子哥" is he rich or is this a JOKE LOL and his mom is at a bar IM CRYING HAHA 

i just get a feeling youku eliminated shiwei for dramatic effect... 

but aw xue en crying over weihao and mxy saying star master kids are all worthy to lin mo 

L O L i was gonna be like oh thats nice enyu’s dad asked about his friends, he’s really been paying attention but then he starts throwing these

L O L I SEE WHERE HE GETS HIS REALNESS FROM HAHAHHAHA

LOL NOW HE KNOWS HOW IT FEELS

omg xikan wanting to call luo zheng!!!! im grateful theyre still close, theyre doing such different things now

awww mubo !!! being all supportive and protective of zuo ye 

hHAHAHA omg fan yu talking on the phone to renyu is so cute, so expressive with the gasp when renyu says they just recorded elims and then the AHHHH and OH MY GOD when he says he and zaixi were eliminated and the ALSKJLAKS and loud sigh when renyu reveals he just tricked him hahahaha theyre so cute omg can fan yu pls show up at the next perf, id die

lin ran’s “new world new me” im cry

lol renyu’s getting roasted by his team mates but at least they didnt really ditch him 

what is this set up anyway? theyre given a mission to leave, so theyre allowed to run around... but not? who planned this lol youku......

LOL jin fan tryin to reason why theyll be ok going to guangzhou 

did their group just get special permission bc director li hao?

hahaha ayyy zhan yu jumped first, you go child! not surprised somehow that he’d love it

lin mo’s group went to the same place? LOL but also they seem so much more under control LOL such a guai group 

LOL WHY ARE THEY SO LOUD HAHAHAH i dont think ive ever seen people that loud on a roller coaster LOL 

LOL why am i not surprised enyu is the one carrying xzx 

i cant with xzx and his heelys omg

leave it to csp to relate bungee jumping to some great deeper meaning for zlj’s personal growth hahahah but good on the kid for going through with it. interesting that zixin said he sees himself in zlj so much

HAHAHHAHA THIS FACE

when reminded he’s the hormone representative his face changed so fast im crying 

ycw is laughing his butt off and i love how it says “children’s playground” in the background

when ycw gets thoroughly ignored

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA OSCAR’S SSHHHHHHHH AND XUE EN TELLS HIM TO WATCH HIS “LANGUAGE LANGUAGE” HAHAHAHHA 

i just realized theres an english speaking line in this group :’) syh, xue en, oscar 

awwwwwwwwww them all planning to sing him happy birthday on the dot and setting it up so he can be at the top at that moment awwww thats so fun

LOL the way that oscar cursed his way to the top and is sweating so hard LOL the poor kid omg HAHAHHA

aw he can tell syh drew the card

LOL ITS OKAY OSCAR I STRUGGLE WITH READING TOO 

get you a friend like ycw who’ll tell you that you can decide how to pronounce words right, just because its your birthday 

struggling to read xue en’s handwriting LOL 

HHAHAHAHHAHAHA HOW DOES XZX RECOGNIZE IT’S HUANG ENYU BY FEELING HIS PECS HAHAHHAHA

i feel the need to just say huang junrong looks so adorable in his bright yellow outfit hahah

there’s two types of kids in this group: hjr and enyu screaming their butts off, and lin mo and xzx wallowing in regret of their life decisions

hjr and enyu always saying its too short when the ride ends LOL

lin mo talking real talk over dinner about their feelings BC HES A REAL LEADER and knows how important it is to address this. these concerns are obviously very present in his mind, even when theyre out having fun to relax, and he’s still trying his best to figure out how he can help them and motivate them. 

makes sense that they would include enyu interview clips bc hes surely spouting the real talk, but i think its interesting its mainly him and lin mo getting screen time. 

enyu would be the one to speak up and say something when lin mo is trying to talk to them though. i think theyre both right though, im guessing lin mo is in part too nice, bc he doesnt feel comfortable enough with them to be as strict as he normally is, bc he knows they have reason to not be motivated and he feels bad for them. but at the same time, he brings up a good point that they themselves need to have their own motivation. it cant just be him putting in effort. and i HUGELY respect that he is telling this to them straight up bc its a hard conversation to have, esp bc im sure he wants them to like him as a friend. but i respect that he knows if they have problems they have to air them out bc lack of communication will be too costly. 

momo is lucky he has someone like enyu on his team who’ll actually talk to him with real opinions rather than just hide in fear of disrupting the status quo. literally enyu is the one voicing that he doesnt want takeout and he doesnt want to stay up late, and other people agree, but the surprise on lin mo’s face just tells you that he wouldnt have even realized these are things that are bothering his teammates unless they straight up told him, and thankfully enyu did, bc lin mo thankfully is reasonable and willing to change his habits for the sake of the group TO HELP THEM. hes willing to do anything he can to help them, as long as they tell him what they want from him. huang enyu’s lesson in communication, dont let people guess, just tell them straight up 

its interesting bc its clear enyu respects lin mo a lot, says he has the experience and the skill and the right to yell at them to get it together, but hes still not afraid to tell lin mo he thinks lin mo should be more strict with them. and then i respect lin mo for not backing down when being criticized and for strongly insisting that they need to put in effort themselves too. he cant force them to do anything they dont want to do themselves. they themselves have to want to do well. 

lin mo is really out here taking care of his group of children and leading them and helping them and looking out for them and im just floored by his leadership yet again. i really hope they can pull it together. 

lin mo is a dork and stanning him leads to mostly either second-hand embarrassment or disappointment. from qcyn to snzm, it just always feels like he’s being mistreated and taken advantage of and stepped on, and sad things just keep happening to him. but then he has these moments where he reminds you of why he’s worth stanning. why it’s worth waiting for something good to finally actually happen. and why he deserves those good things. its just so nice to see hes getting some appreciation and recognition for the things he does. at least youku let us see his leadership in action. 

aw 

totally not surprised akey is there to drive the conversation for their group’s real talk time. tyger co-leader translates clearly hahah

LOL LI HAO TOTALLY FORGOT THE SNZM DANCE LOL

im like not surprised xikan’s group got the least adventurous adventure bc hes not afraid to show how serious hes taking this competition, but also somehow still feel like hes not getting better treatment relative to being number one?? maybe im just overthinking 

honestly all things considered im okay with this being the debut group

i mean i love ycw and zry but i feel like this makes sense to me.

this looks scary lol lin ran wyd

but yea even the way they framed the cliff hanger for next week... why do i just feel like xikan is not being treated with the respect he deserves?? 

anywayyyyyyyyyyyy for 少年營業中

LOL gz’s impression of zlj watching scary movies sounds so accurate im ded

zixin is so adorable!! i love his outfit too ahhah 

LOL gz’s sassy response to zlj responding when xue en says he’s gonna talk about a cute trainee with highly regarded visuals 

why am i totally not surprised xue en didnt get scared but zixin got scared AGAIN lol 

why do i suddenly get the realization that we hardly ever see ycw and zlj interact 

it just feels weird to see them together even tho they obviously have overlapping friend groups lol....

poor shiwei isnt even here and they keep talking about him LOL at least theyre not even really roasting him LOL ycw and yzx too nice for that

im just DYING at the cto gege’s laughing SO HARD HAHAHA 

and ycw’s face LOL 

xue en’s laugh made this ep worth it LOL

wow should i be happy that lin mo is finally in the next ep of this side show, or sad that jin fan never got to appear and itll be the last ep :( im also excited to see lin ran again! wow its weird to think that snzm is ending soon, it felt like the first 7 eps were like a slow burn and now its a mad rush to the end 

[chocosweetbun]

ASOUE FIC 2.5K Words, Kitlafey

(I don’t write often, especially not fluff, so please forgive me =v=. Happy Valentine’s Day!!)

@huffleporg @madlovve and anyone else who enjoys this OT3!

(childhood friends/neighbors, there’s not enough au’s in this fandom that don’t follow canon, SLOW BURN god so slow- Theyre just friends for the first 2k words im so sorry)

Behind the school yard, a ways into the evergreen woods that stretch off into places no student ever dared to go, sits a strange sight. A patch a trees with branches low enough for the smallest of kids to climb, a clearing of light that cuts though tall soft grass and weeds, and a group of rocks that formed a throne fit for a forest king. No one ever saw it, no one ever went. It was the perfect spot for exactly 3 old friends to visit after years of absence, and yet they never did- at least, no one knew they did.

Kit Snicket was an adventurer. She fought off monsters under her bed, under her school desk, under- and over- teachers and other kids. You would think being 4’3 at age 10 would be a hindrance, but to her, and her wild red-brown hair that seemed to shift to blond in the sunlight, it was an advantage. She was popular to pick for every PE class, every recess, and every time someone needed defending on the playground. But that was only her at half power, for when she was with her two best friends, she was unstoppable. A wild-child in every sense of the word. Dewey Denouement didn’t exist. His brothers overshadowed him despite not meaning too and often the 11 year old was left in the back of the class to read whatever book he fancied that day. He wasn’t shy, but he had this quiet-politeness about him that made people think he faked his responses and conversations. Almost as though he just recited what he read somewhere. He just didn’t talk like a kid his age would, and it threw the others off. However, when he was with his two best friends his dazzling smile was present on his face no matter what. A calm boy who found where he belonged. Olaf (he dared tell no one his last name) was the kid everyone avoided. Due to unfortunate events and an odd placing birthday he was the oldest in his class at 13. Being 13 he had hit his “I hate everyone and everything” phase that all young teens go though, which meant he would often upset his younger classmates with harsh words and unpleasant actions passed off as pranks. His thin red-orange hair never seemed to be quite clean, his clothes were obviously expensive but never tidy, his fingers covered in small burns which he never would explain. The two classmates that would interact with him were the only reason he didn’t go insane being surrounded by people who refused to look his way. A strange teen who needed to let off smoke. Behind the school yard, a ways into the evergreen woods that stretched off into places no student ever dared to go, sat a strange sight. A patch a trees with branches low enough for the smallest of kids to climb, a clearing of light that cut though tall soft grass and weeds, and a group of rocks that formed a throne fit for a forest king. The group of friends found this when the schoolhouse’s kitchen caught fire and their class had to stand outside for the fire department to arrive. Olaf had snuck off, Kit behind him, and, when noticing his friends disappear into the trees, Dewey cocked a smile at the idea of a mini adventure and ran off to join them. “Holy shit- that’s a big snake-“ The eldest said, reaching out as though he was about to grab it. “What are you DOING?!” Kit pulled Olaf back with a surprising amount of strength. “It could kill you!” “Oh no it wouldn’t, I would kill it first before it even had the chance!” “Yeah right! Tell ‘em he would D I E Dewey!” “Ah-“ the middle child said, stuffing his book that he brought out to read in his backpack as the group walked further into the woods. ”That snake isn’t venomous so- He would probably be okay if it bit him-” “Dewey that didn’t help!” “Hey kit-kat mind letting go of me?” With that, Kit huffed as she pushed Olaf forward. “Fine but don’t go grabbing anything that Dewey doesn’t know the name of!” The child took hold of Dewey’s hand as she spoke- the innocent gesture was returned. “Fine fine- I won’t do anything pretty boy wouldn’t do.” And he continued the walk ahead. It wasn’t long before they found those trees, that clearing, and those rocks. They spent some time there playing- the faint sirens of firetrucks blaring in the distance telling them they were not missed- and as I’m sure you could imagine the three each found the best spot to be. Kit climbing the trees, Dewey lying in the grass, and Olaf perched on the rocks. They laughed, talked, threw leaves and grass, picked flowers (Dewey and Kit did- Olaf just watched) and overall had a good 30 minutes of time together before they heard the large red trucks drive away. “We should go back.” Dewey said. “Yeah, you’re right.” Kit replied, hopping down from a branch. Olaf came down from his throne and stood over the two, his face showing that he was deep in thought. “Are you guys doing anything after school tomorrow?” He said. ________________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________ The next day, and the day after that, and the day after that, the group kept visiting the hidden place in the trees. August turned to September, then October, then November. When it got too cold to go walking the trio would visit Olaf’s empty house and attempt to build forts and bake holiday cookies. But on New Year’s Eve the three agreed to hop out of their bedroom windows, run though the snow with flashlights in their small hands, and meet in the forest where they would all climb up the biggest tree and watch the fireworks from the very top. They neglected to think about the ice on the branches, and after the 5th time Kit slipped and fell- they gave up. “I’m telling you I CAN DO IT-“ Kit struggled in the grasp of Olaf’s arms, who was desperately trying to keep her from breaking her own neck. “You’ll break your neck!” Dewey said, standing in front of the tree with his arms spread- as if that would block the young girl from wanting to climb. “When has Dew ever been wrong, huh? Gah- stop it!” “AHH-!” Kit shouted as Olaf tackled her to the ground. You may be thinking ‘That boy is double her size! Surely he hurt her-‘ and you would be completely wrong. Olaf was a thin, weak child, and Kit was more durable then one might think. He pinned her down in the snow, sitting with his legs across her stomach, as though she were a pillow under his knees. “Get off of me! Uuuugh!!!” And with that last sigh, she was defeated. Olaf then plopped back, legs still over Kit, to lie in the cold snow. Dewey soon joined them, using Olaf’s stomach as a headrest. As the sound of fireworks began on the horizon, the three were all thinking the very same thing. “I really could have got up that tree-“ “We can die if we stay in the snow-” “I’m happy you guys are here with me-“ Well, not exactly the same thing. “I’m happy too! I really love you guys!” Kit said, using her arms to make a torso-only snow angel. The snow was not nearly deep enough though, so her jacket got stained with mud. “I love you both too!” Dewey said, using a foot to kick around some dead twigs in the ground. “Like a couple of kids like you could know what love is.” Olaf scoffed, his teen drama act rearing its head. “I’m hardly a kid anymore! I’m 11 now!” “No, Kit, you’re still a kid.” “Well Dewey is almost 13 like you!” When the sound of the fireworks ended, the three prepared to part ways. Dewey brushed off the mud on Kit’s coat with his gloves and did his best to fix her hair while she bickered more with Olaf on how old someone must be to not be a ‘kid’ anymore. Kit says 11, Olaf says 13, and Dewey thinks to himself that whenever that age may be, they all would remain childish like this forever. ________________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________ February 14th rushed though fast, and after school the three once again met up behind the schoolyard. Dewey brought handwritten letters detailing how important the other two were to him, Kit gave them handmade pottery that she had made in art class, and Olaf said “Happy Valentine’s Day” while giving them necklaces crudely made, the pendants being a small crow feather on each. He also wore one and said he had just happened to make extras. This evening was not spent separate, instead all three of them sat in the thawing grass, side by side by side. They were just finishing up a conversation on the best kind of chocolate when Dewey (who has been silently listening) asked a question. “What is it like to have a crush on someone?” “It means you want to get married, right?” Kit said, her childish innocence causing Olaf to snicker. “Nah, It means you want to make out with them.” Olaf leaned back on his hands, obviously trying to appear cool. “Ew-“ Kit scrunched up her nose “That’s gross, don’t people only do that on T.V.?” “No I don’t think so.” Dewey pulled his knees to his chest. “That’s just like…kissing and stuff- right?” “Yeah sure, basically.” “Have- you kissed anyone before Olaf?” Dewey asked with his usual soft tone, but a bit of nervousness peaked though his posture. On the other side of the taller boy, Kit’s eyes grew wide with curiosity. “Oh he probably has! Right? Was it gross?” Kit leaned in close to Olaf, pushing said boy closer to Dewey. The eldest stayed silent, opting to ignore his friend’s questions by standing straight up, causing Kit to crash into Dewey’s legs. “wal ha wahs meen” Which roughly translates too “Well that was mean” when said by a girl who is face first in a pair of knees. Olaf walked away as the other two were left sitting. “Was I too blunt…?” Dewey helped Kit lean back off his legs. “I think he’s just in one of his moods.” Rubbing her nose, she stood, reaching her hand out to help Dewey stand. He took hold without a second thought, and soon the both of them were caught up with Olaf. The three of them went back to talking as though nothing had ever even happened. The next day, in class, Olaf pulled Dewey aside. “Is it Kit?” The teen said. “Maybe, I’m not sure.” The short boy paused and tried for a moment to read Olaf’s expression. “Would you be upset if it was?” “Yes.” ________________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________

When Dewey turned 13, Olaf 14, they shared a moment behind one of the rocks during a game of ‘Hide from Kit so she doesn’t make you stick fight with her’. “Why did you-“ “Because I wanted too.” In the moment neither was really sure who said what, or who kissed who. Kit found them, and all three were forced to avoid getting beat with a stick-sword for nearly an hour. ________________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________ When Kit turned 12 she told Olaf that she was in love with him. He asked her why she thought so when she was obviously closer to Dewey. She couldn’t answer- and argued that she was equally close with them both. “So why DO you think you love me and not him then?” He had asked. She begun to cry in frustration and left with a “Whatever- Forget it. I guess I don’t know my own feelings.” Olaf thought to himself that she was beginning her ‘I hate everyone and everything’ phase a little sooner than he expected. ________________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________ The kids were growing up, Dewey thought to himself, and he saw it in the way Kit hugged his arm whenever she was avoiding whatever harsh words Olaf said. He also saw it in how Olaf refused to let Dewey lean against him anymore. But as the three of them quietly walked to their normal place- he realized that they weren’t growing UP, but APART. The thought made him want to cry. That day Olaf told them that his parent’s were sending him to a boarding school, and that he was leaving right away. Dewey started crying, realizing that there was no way to salvage the relationship that was breaking- He started crying more when Kit let go of his arm, marched over to Olaf, and hugged him for the first time in a month of silence, arms linked around his neck. Dewey watched as Olaf hugged her in return, the image of her small form surrounded by his tall lanky one was out of place in the summer sky. “You can’t go-“ Dewey heard Kit say as he slowly walked over to the pair. “I can’t stay, I’ve tried-“ Dewey reached the couple and hesitated for a moment- watching the two of them embrace in their last ever meeting. He felt like he was intruding- but his urge to say goodbye to Olaf and comfort Kit was too overwhelming. He was not alone in this, for Kit and Olaf both pulled him into their hug before he had a chance to try and worm his way in himself. “I- I really love you guys-“ Kit’s words were laced with sorrow and the sound of cicadas.

“I love you both two-“ Dewey replied, dropping his book to the hard ground as he buried his face into Olaf’s chest and Kit’s hair. “I- I’m going to miss you.” Olaf said to them both. Neither of them brought up how that was the first nice thing Olaf had ever said to either of them in the years of knowing each other, unless you count the hundreds of tears that puddled up on the ground.

________________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________ A decade later and some change later, a young woman with red-brown hair stepped into the sunny spot on the soft grass and weeds, the feather necklace being blown by the wind. A young man with a dazzling smile was holding her hand, adorned with a ring, and he, too, modeled a similar necklace. However it was tied around his wrist for he had grown out of it. They wave to a figure appearing from behind the too-small to climb trees, the feathered neck-piece lengthened to fit his adult form. No one ever saw them, no one ever will. It was the perfect spot for exactly 3 old friends to visit after years of absence and talk about never forgotten feelings, muddy coats, growing families, and how to spend the rest of Valentine’s day. They didn’t go though with their plans, and instead rested together in the thawing grass until dusk.

[everydayanth]

The Liam Neeson Thing...

Okay guys, this is gonna get complex and personal right quick. But it’s been bothering me and I’m working on posting more without thinking about it for two weeks until nobody cares anymore.

So here goes.

Context matters. Context is important and it can be complicated, but it freakin’ matters. 

In my opinion, Liam Neeson’s flaw was that he thought a rapist would be the kind of person to also attack him. 

Here’s the thing guys, if you’ve never heard someone you love confess to you that they have been irrevocably hurt by a person, you need to take a step back for a minute. 

That moment, talking about it, it’s extremely vulnerable, so this is a bit hard for me, but in a moment of chaos and torment, a person you love and care deeply for is breaking apart in front of you and there isn’t a damned thing you can do about it. There’s not a damn thing you can do but hold them and cry with them and hurt for them and try to help and figure out the right thing to say. 

And when they’re tucked safe in bed and you’re researching what you can do for them or laying awake thinking about what you could possibly say, the amount of guilt and hurt and anger hits you in the chest, it fills you so wholly that you just need to find a way to let it out. It’s a dangerous rage, it’s immature and unhealthy and so so so painful. 

We don’t talk about emotions in America. We just don’t. So of course we want to put this emotion into a context we discuss, and idea we understand. 

But it’s not an -ism, it’s an emotion. 

If you don’t think when my sister told me about our cousin assaulting her that I didn’t wander around my ghetto ass neighborhood waiting for some big white guy to try to hurt me, well, you’d be wrong. Our brain makes patterns, my cousin didn’t live in our city, but I knew he was a big white guy with a shitty pencil beard, my brain classified that as a pattern. Every time I talked to a big white guy, I had to check myself, yeah. But when my brain registered a human who looked like my cousin, my heart rate ran up and I would will them to attack me. I wanted to fight because I didn’t know what else to do with all that pain, all that helpless emotion. But I could wander around places where someone was bound to get hurt anyway and invite the fight to me. 

Neeson was wandering around areas inviting a fight. INVITING, not instigating. It is a common reaction of revenge and feeling hurt, and we’re shoving this idea into something familiar - outrage, racism, etc., anything so we don’t have to actually talk about emotions. 

He was looking for a “black bastard,” poor choice of words, I agree, but he was hoping that guy, the one who hurt his friend, would challenge him, and it would just happen to be the same guy and he could get his anger out. It’s not healthy, but if they man who hurt his friend had been white and he’d wandered around lower class white neighborhoods inviting a fight, would it have been racism? 

This had an opportunity to be a conversation about what the fuck you do around a friend who confesses they were raped and hurt to you. After all the #MeToo (or in the midst of it), how do you be a friend to your loved ones who feel ready to confess to you? What do you do to manage that amount of disgust you feel at the world, that rage and hate and hurt and horror that there’s not a single damn thing you can do? 

This could have been a conversation about grief and friendship and growth and complex emotions. But we made it about the race of a rapist instead. 

That’s how much we don’t want to talk about feelings. 

We would focus on a man talking for the first time about the anger of helplessness in the face of a friend’s pain and come out in outrage. 

Here’s the reality guys, racism is forming a series of patterns based on skin color that aren’t true. They can be based off stereotypes or influenced by false representation in sensational news. Racism is NOT fighting your brain’s reality in order to form a more balanced understanding of the world. I was assaulted by a bunch of black kids at a playground when I was 14, it was terrifying and it’s a long and complex story but the short of it is very simple: I lived in a black neighborhood and this was not my only experience with black kids. I went to school with middle class black kids and I hung out with other black kids, this was NOT my only experience, and therefore, my brain was capable of nixing the pattern before it was created. Black kids weren’t dangerous, those kids were just assholes. 

Racism is if Neeson went to those places and started fights. I can’t know whether he did or not, but it’s if he went around and accused every black man of being a rapist, in his head or otherwise. I didn’t have a lot of experience with big white guys, so it took me much longer not to feel nervous around them than it did to write off my brain’s pattern about the black kids. Emotions and how our brains work are important details for us to know, and it’s the real reason diversity matters, it keeps our patterns in context. Neeson coming out of the situation horrified at himself shows growth of emotion, the dismissal of the pattern, recognizing that it is false without acting on it, understanding the power of agency is an illusion because he would never find that particular man. 

Comparing this to the policing issues isn’t the same, because of their place in society, their home culture society, and the results of their opinions. A police officer has a responsibility to the public to understand their emotions and their racial biases, an actor is responsible for displaying emotion. We can’t hold these people to the same accountability, that would be ridiculous, for a police officer, emotions need to be stable and understood and should involve a LOT more psychology training. For an actor... they entertain us with their emotions. They need to be self aware and reflective in order to project our experiences in stories. We still expect race car drivers to follow the speed limits and we understand that doctors have to call in sick sometimes, the world isn’t fair and occupation doesn’t dismiss personal biases or professional demeanor, but context matters. A doctor calling in sick after handling small pox in a lab requires observation and questions, an actor talking about rage and looking for a fight when he was younger and confessing horror at that version of himself while promoting a film about revenge kind of seems like part of the job, of doing the job well.  

And it’s not racist because it was not instigated by the color of skin as perceived by an individual to be less or more - he was inviting a fight with a black man on the word of his friend. That was wrong, and so was me doing it with large white men (also because I am not that large of a white woman, so that wasn’t going to end well for me), but he even said in a follow up interview that they could have killed him. The interviewer says she thinks of the innocent black man that could have been killed and Neeson responds “Or he could have killed me.” BUT HE WASN’T INSTIGATING FIGHTS, he was INVITING them! He wasn’t looking for an innocent man, he was waiting for someone to try to hurt him so he could release the extreme emotions. These are different. These are SO different. 

This conversation can go back to what it could have been. Race of the rapist aside, what do you do when a person you love confides in you that they have been hurt and scared and they are breaking apart in front of you? How do you process your emotions and heartbreak? What can you do or say? How can you feel like you’re helping? Is that selfish? Why do we need to feel like we’re helping? How do you manage your own trauma so you don’t loop theirs in with yours? How do you self reflect so that you stop your brain forming false patterns when you’re filled with so much hurt and pain? How do you not become a villain of the world, hating everyone for always telling you you are helpless? How do you find control in yourself when you’re imploding and be responsible and mature with emotions? How do you talk about it in a society that wants to be angry? How do you not hate them for focusing on your reaction to a rapist rather than being angry with an individual for being an asshole and RAPING your friend?

How do we return to a conversation about emotions and how, unchecked, they can lead to pain and anger and rage, and eventually, if we don’t have a moment of clarity and rationality, if we are not balanced in the world, they can become biases that develop into ignorance and racism? How do we focus on context so that we don’t become arrogant and disconnected, classists by nature because we interact with such a small and similar world? How do we connect and talk about the human experience when society turns away from us in favor of what is familiar? How do we have a logical discussion about emotion when we can’t even talk about meaning and intent? How do we accuse someone of racism when, had the rapist been white, the conversation might have focused on the context of emotion and pain and hurt and the process of healing - it was the outraged audience that pointed at the race as important, as the meaningful factor, how do we look at that hypocrisy and not feel utterly defeated?

How do we scream at the world that we need help, we all need help, without crucifying ourselves? I have no idea, this post is terrifying and I have no idea what to expect. Maybe nothing would be good? To return to not a single note or like or comment, to be unheard and dismissed and navigated around might be good because I want to talk about this reality but it. Is. Terrifying. 

And maybe it’s all a projection. Maybe I’m the racist and I want to defend someone I relate to. But it feels more right that we as a society don’t talk about emotions, we lock them up like these secret things we’re terrified other people will discover. I’m working on vulnerability lately, and what better place to talk about all the shit that’s ever happened to me than the freakin’ internet! I’m just a person and from my experiences, I think I understand what Neeson meant. But that could equally be a self-aggrandizing reality that doesn’t exist. Perhaps he’s just a racist, a professional actor with a successful career who took this exact moment to reveal his true colors, what a sneaky man! 

But more probably, the logic says, he’s a professional actor with a successful career who took this moment to discuss the emotions he’s had to reflect on and relive for the past year or so in order to play a role in a film that he hopes will entertain and reflect something of the human experience. He more probably took the moment to discuss a human experience and we did not listen because it’s more popular not to listen or because we could not relate or because we just want to be angry and sometimes pulling weeds is so exhausting we raze the whole garden instead. We did not talk about the moment he was horrified with himself because we don’t want to talk about growth or greys, we want the world to stabilize so we can see the bad guys clearly. 

We really ought to know by now that there are no clear bad guys. 

And we know Neeson likes to play in those lines. What is good? What is bad? They aren’t a duality, they are a false dichotomy, created by whatever world you grew up in, whatever experiences you had, whatever your society or culture told you, whatever education you discovered, and whatever philosophy you’ve come to believe. But in a moment of vulnerable confession, in all that grey reality, your friend tells you about a bad guy and they become singularly bad. They don’t exist beyond that. And that’s what is horrifying. That you stop seeing humanity as grey and suddenly it becomes good or bad, that’s the scary part about revenge and inviting fights, it encourages a black-and-white view of the world that says the rapist is ONLY bad and your friend is ONLY good. 

A bit ironic that, in trying to talk about that tunnel-vision-rage, Neeson found himself the target of it.

It’s raw, that anger. It’s part of all the hurt that has happened to you and then you couldn’t even protect your friend or family. Why did you go through all that pain if you couldn’t grow enough to save them? That guilt is a liar, you didn’t hurt them, the asshole did, and you need that to be true or else you were also the cause of all your own pain as well. So you look for the assholes because then at least you could be useful, you could protect them from one asshole by taking the hit. We need to talk about that kind of hurt, about sacrificing the self for revenge because you can’t find worth anymore. We need to talk about existential nihilism that hides inside outrage because you can’t find meaning anymore. We need to talk about emotions and how to talk about them so we can be better friends, better people, so when we look for guidance on talking to friends about their hurt, we find advice on how to not be overwhelmed by rage and guilt and disgust and anger and violence. 

That’s the conversation we could have had. That’s the world we could have started to create. But outrage culture is racist and racism gets attention and we all just want to be heard because we don’t know how to talk about our emotions. Interesting how it keeps going around like that. 

[xwildwhirlx]

Things/People I saw/encountered at Makers Faire 2018

⁃ a man with several zucchinis in guitar form wired so the zucchinis beeped whenever pressed ⁃ it actually sounded pretty good ⁃ A GIANT RC TRAILER WITH SEVERAL ROBOT MONSTROSITIES BUILT INTO IT ⁃ SAID MONSTROSITIES WERE CONSTANTLY SPEWING FIRE ⁃ THERE WAS A FISH AND AN ARMADILLO AND A DEVIL ⁃ AND MOST OF THEM WERE CONSTANTLY MOVING ⁃ MY FAVORITE WAS THE GOAT ⁃ I GOT SO EXCITED BY THE FIREY GOAT THAT I THINK SOME PEOPLE WERE CONCERNED ⁃ “Miss Frizzle” ⁃ VR HEADSET DRONES ⁃ I played with legos and built an ox ⁃ Some dude walked by dressed up as Rick from Rick and Morty ⁃ Dude with some cool art selling signed books and posters ⁃ I think his name was Matt??? ⁃ two RC cars that were shaped like a giant hedgehog and mouse being chased by small children ⁃ There were a lot of steampunk people and machines ⁃ You know those playground things? I forgot the name but it’s those lil merry go rounds that you spin yourself ⁃ That but A SCULPTURE OF SEVERAL SHARKS IS ATTACHED TO IT SO WHEN IT GETS GOING IT LOOKS LIKE THEYRE SWIMMING ⁃ this was entirely children powered ⁃ THEY WERE GOING SO FAST ⁃ I managed to hop on and I was scARED ⁃ SO FAST ⁃ HOW DO THEY GO SO FAST ⁃ A kid told me to “walk the plank” because I jumped on without helping to push it ⁃ I was like “ok fair” but thEN I LOOKED DOWN ⁃ #NOPE ⁃ and this adorbs lil kid makes fun of me like “you think this is fast????” ⁃ I’m like “YES PLS SLOW DOWN!!! IS THIS WHAT THE KIDS THINK IS FUN” ⁃ Then he said some shit like “#Yes” and I was like YOOOO ⁃ “#NOPLSJUSTSLOWDOWN” ⁃ THEN HIS BUDDY JOINS IN AND SHES LIKE “#YES” ⁃ “#PLSIDONTWANTTODIE” ⁃ A THIRD KID GLEEFULLY JOINS IN WITH ANOTHER “#YES” ⁃ “#NO!” ⁃ EVERYONE IS YELLING OVER THE SOUND OF CHILDREN AND METAL ⁃ WERE HAPPILY SCREAMING “HASHTAG” AT EACHOTHER LIKE FREAKS ⁃ then the girl asks me if I’m an adult ⁃ And I’m like “kinda? Almost?” ⁃ AND I SEE THE JUDGMENT IN HER EYES ABOUT ME BEING AFRAID OF A SLIGHTLY SPEEDY PLAYGROUND SET THAT IS POWERED BY LITERAL CHILD LABOR ⁃ first dude gives me advice on which roller coasters to ride and asks me if I’ve been on one ⁃ I tell him i haven’t and he’s like “WHAAAAAT?? WHY?” ⁃ “I’m an introvert” ⁃ “Oh” ⁃ At this point I’m dizzy from the spinning world and my legs are like jelly ⁃ I managed to muster the courage to leap off the deathtrap and away from the children who are all age 8-12 that just pwned me ⁃ “dad pls help” ⁃ ANYWAYS WE MOVE ON ⁃ Rick appears again ⁃ Apparently his.... mask??? Bobblehead? Thing??? Is just two halves that fit together ⁃ I was kind wondering how he got it on ⁃ It was handmade too! ⁃ Got distracted by a shiny and wandered away from my family ⁃ FOUND THE SOURCE OF THE STEAMPUNK ⁃ STEAMPUNK GLASSES! STEAMPUNK DRESSES! STEAMPUNK HATS! ⁃ VERY, VERY EXPENSIVE STEAMPUNK HATS! ⁃ ONE OF THEM HAD THE REMAINS OF AN ACTUAL RATTLESNAKE ON IT OH MY GOD I ALMOST FAINTED FROM JOY ⁃ SO MUCH AESTHETIC ⁃ HEAVEN ON EARTH ⁃ SUPER NICE employe was helping me ⁃ “Here’s the hats.... this one is probably too big for you.... I’ll put it back, it’s pretty high!” ⁃ “OMFGGfugfhmfhnHfnfh HOW MUCH DO THESE COST I WANT ONE SO BEAUTIFUL” ⁃ costs like 400 buck but I’m not surprised ⁃ GOOD CRAFTSMANSHIP AND GREAT AESTHETIC ⁃ LIKE HOLY. SHIT. ⁃ i was like “lol my mom will never buy this for me especially since I accidentally ran off without telling her” ⁃ My mom catches up and drags me back to our family group ⁃ “CAN I HAVE A BUISNESS CARD”

BADDA BOOM BADDAFUCKINGBING

And here’s the two posters I bought from that Matt dude - Matt Gaset

Aaaaaannnnnnnddddd......

STEAMPUNK GOOGLES

(Staring Sugar, who likes plastic bags)

[enbyblades]

all 50

1: What is your name and does it mean anything?sam, im pretty sure i was named after a character on a show my mom liked2: How long have you known your best friend?roughly 3 years3: What position do you normally sleep in?i curl up and hug a pillow 4: Were you a part of any “clique” in high school?…weeb5: Who was your favorite teacher in high school and why?mrs. harley is my favorite teacher of all time, she was so sweet and caring and understanding and she tries so hard and i love her so much, i miss her 6: Do you wish to travel a lot?no7: Did you participate in any sports while in school?lmao whats a sport8: Show a sample of your handwriting:….no9: Have you ever given blood?NO THANKJS I HAVE AN INTENSE FEAR OF NEEDLES10: Do you like the way that you grew up?..idk?11: Do you like your siblings? Why or why not?i love them bc theyre great, sweet kids but i dont love that im their part time mother12: How did you meet your best friend and why did you become friends?i met auTumn in PE freshman year bc we didnt have any friends in that class and she liked my hair and she turned out to be the greatest person  13: Name one movie that made you cry.any movie where the dog dies14: Do you prefer to read poetry, write poetry, or neither?neither15: Things about someone that you find attractive?…chill 16: What song are you currently listening to?im not17: Have you ever broken a bone? If so, how?no, i am a Safe child18: A random memory from you childhood:one time when i was v small, my cat ran out of my apartment and my mom had to chase her and get her back and it was scary19: Where did you grow up?phoenix20: What was the last thing you watched on tv?probably gravity falls21: Do you think you’d make a good parent?not really22: Would you like to meet any of your Tumblr friends in person?yeA i would22: What was the last dream you remember having?i had a real weird dream with a panther and weird ass house that went on forever23: When is your birthday?feb 25th24: How many pillows do you sleep with?all of them25: Do you wear glasses? If so, how long have you been wearing glasses?yes, and for…5ish years maybe? dunno 26: What color is your hair?blonde27: Name 5 facts about your appearance:- i look like an anime- my hair is short- my eyes change color sometimes apparently??- no titty- i have an art kid aesthetic sometimes28: What is your favorite soda?i dont rlly have a favorite29: What is a strange talent that you have?i can pick up ANYTHING with my toes30: How’s the weather right now?sizzlin’31: Why did one of your friendships end?bitchy32: Who do you miss right now?shrugs33: Why did your last relationship end?sarah, u sent this ask34: Are you still figuring out who you are?who my what35: Have you ever been admitted to a hospital? Why?i had a spinal fusion and my week in the hospital was the best week of my life36: What is your favorite restaurant?dont have one37: What is word that you always seem to spell wrong?“fuck” but not bc i dont know how to 38: Would ever adopt kids?prob not39: What is your favorite kind of pizza?dont have a favorite40: What was your first thought when you woke up this morning?“i have to babysit…”41: When was the last time you got really really happy and why?i saw autumn today and i love being around herr42: What’s the strangest thing you’ve ever eaten?i dont eat43: How do you start a conversation?i do not44: What’s a band you’ve been obsessed with lately?i havent been, ive been listening to the hamilton soundtrack45: Do you come from a family “of money?”lmaO no46: Do you have a bucket list?i want cats47: What is your favorite series of books?WARRIORS48: When was the last time you laughed so hard your stomach hurt?not sure but i laughed pretty hard at a tiny hat today49: Where do you go when you’re sad?ppl go places?50: 5 random facts about yourself:- i love cats more than anything- @crosseyedmarshmallow is my Best Friend and i love her - my favorite children are sans, dipper, pidge, kuroko, and peridot- ive been thinking about mcgenji all week- i wanna live in one of those houses thats just….a huge ass cat playground….u know the ones