#they're kind of terrified of that happening again in these relationships they've let themself lean in to.
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byanyan · 10 months ago
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anyway i'm officially at the point where i'm on the floor crying over how a lot of these 'call my muse by their full name' prompts have been like "yeong-hwan? that's weird. you're obviously byan."
#it makes byan so!!!!!! ugh!!!!! it's one of those moments where they realize they've put their trust in the right people#and it makes them a lot more emotional than they'll let on (in turn making ME v emotional)#they don't have a TON of moments where they really like. struggle in terms of their gender.#they stopped letting other peoples' opinions of them get to them too badly a long time ago#(or they like. take it out on those people with violence)#but when it comes to the people who DO matter to them........ and when it comes to their name... they do have concerns#they do get nervous. they DO get uncomfortable.#they've had people who seem supportive turn their backs on them before. ones who turned out to not take them seriously before.#they're kind of terrified of that happening again in these relationships they've let themself lean in to.#so having the people who matter to them most brush off their 'real' name in favour of byan is honestly so big for them#especially bc like. they're clearly very open about not abiding by gender binary but it's not smth they really TALK about with people so#it's HUGE to have people just accept that without any real explanation on their end?#it's incredibly validating. it makes them feel v accepted and that's not a feeling they get a lot so it's. yeah. it's Important#and it honestly earns that person some bonus trust points too tbh#i'm losing my train of thought but just know that i love these and that they're super significant to byan ok ty#━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ ooc ⋮ don't @ me.
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