#they see him and immediately become attracted to him and he doesn't easily give himself away at first

[noirve]

louis is such an it girl and he just acts like it's nothing "do you want to now? he sometimes lingers when boats come into harbor" boy STOP teasing you're about to give this man a heart attack, everybody wants your ass so bad

[goldsbitch]

Four times I bumped into you and the one time I fell

There is no such thing as right time, wrong place. Once the timing is right, the world will spin on its axis to bring two souls together.

fluff, no warnings

Running late to the airport was an absolute no go for you - well, that was until you met Lando, with whom you somehow lost all the travel anxiety. But this was good twelve years before you'd officially meet. While neither of you were aware, it was him who quite literally crashed into you, as he was rushing to catch a flight he was characteristically late for.

This was your first long trip alone, so to say you were anxious would be an understatement. Airports were designed to be understood quite easily, but there you were, unsure where you were suppose to go after the security check. With head turned up to all those signs, you tried to make out where in hell did this place wanted you to go to. Just like a thunder, unexpected and attention-grabbing, Lando bumped into you from behind, full force. He wasn't expecting someone to be just standing there in the middle of the busy pathway.

"Shit," he cussed, already being late to his gate. He quickly checked whether you were ok, mad at you for standing there like a post and a bit angry with himself, for being unable to follow a normal timetable. Your left shoulder received quite a big blow, so after your squirted with pain, you looked at your left arm, before you sought the culprit. When your eyes met, you forgot about all of the pain. In front of you stood an absolutely gorgeous boy. He must have been around your age, boyish looks lacing his face. That sort of cheeky innocence late teenagers have. He was taken back, just like you were, and immediately forgot why he was angry in the first place. Both of you were shy as could be in that moment. The only thing he managed to get out of himself was a little sorry. You smiled and then looked down at your feet. Not knowing what to do, he just uttered another quick apology and set on to continue with his journey to the gate.

"Wait, sorry," you managed to get out of yourself, just as he was about to disappear into the distance. He stopped and turned.

"Yes?" he answered, sheepishly.

You swallowed and tried to speak without getting your tongue twisted. "Can you please show me which way I'm suppose to go?"

You had a true desperate look on you, one that a boy raised like him could never resist. A shot of guilt went though him once he saw you holding your shoulder, probably still bit in pain.

"Sure," he said and proceeded to look at your flight ticket. As he leaned over you, your heart stopped. His proximity was making you almost shiver. Strong perfume, or possibly deodorant given his age, hit your nose. But it wasn't like when other boys were wearing it in school. You wanted to soak yourself in it and drown. He told you some words, explaining where you're suppose to go, but you didn't get any of that. Full on panic from being attracted to him overtook your brain. You nodded, as if you'd understood, and looked him in the eyes again. Both of you held on longer than what would be considered appropriate.

"I gotta go," he muttered and made his exit once again. Didn't turn back, because just like you, he was panicking just a bit.

Once he left your eyesight, you looked at the board again, confused, perhaps more than you were before asking him for directions.

//

"Still nothing?" your friend asked, having no choice but becoming fully invested in your newest crush, guy you shared one lecture last semester. You checked your phone once again, but both of you knew what your answer would be.

"Nothing," you replied after not seeing his name on the list of people who watched your story on Instagram.

Funny, how you can go on an amazing backpacking trip with your bestie, live life to the fullest - and none of it matters if he doesn't give a fuck. In fact, it was infuriating. You were sitting nearby a lovely canal somewhere in Amsterdam, meeting new people every day, having the time of your life. All while checking your phone every five minutes.

Your bestie could tell you were more than annoyed. She herself found it pretty exhausting, because sometimes, it felt like this guy was on the trip with both of you.

"I gotta get him out of my head," you said finally after few minutes of silence.

"Yup. You do realize he is a loser, do you?" your friend said and you laughed because at that time, you just did not see where she was coming from. Years later, you'd be laughing about it.

"I do, yeah. I mean, fuck it, I'm in Amsterdam. This is so cool!" you said, trying to pump yourself up to some enthusiasm.

"That's more like it," your friend replied, more than ready to start talking about anything else than that guy. "Let's just, you know, look around and get inspired. We might find someone for you tonight!"

You laughed. "What, like on the street?"

She just shrugged her shoulders. "You never know..."

You observed the people walking on the other side of the canal. "What about that one?" you pointed to a guy smoking on a bridge, hoping he didn't see you.

"Could work...but there is better material around."

Few moments passed. "Uh, what about that one?" your friend pointed to nice looking guy, who was casually jogging around.

You tried to zoom in, not really sure what to make of him. "Yeah, maybe..."

And then, Lando decided to check his phone, while running, and immediately found himself on the ground, as he managed to miss a hole in the street.

Both of you people-watchers couldn't help but laugh out loud. He couldn't hear you and nobody else apart from didn't seem to notice his fall.

"Ok, maybe not that one," your friend jokes, not knowing she just marked off your future husband.

//

The immigration office. Dreaded place where no one is ever happy. It's also the one place where you can't send someone to just "do it for you". Lando would pay anything to be able to get out of this.

He was sat there for a good half an hour, even though he had a pre-booked appointment. He couldn't recall last time he was this bored. His recent success run had many perks, the best of them being the fact he could often jump lines and get many shortcuts. Not the immigration office. These people just don't care.

It stopped being important the moment you walked though the door and sat across from him, failing to pay any attention to your surroundings. The moment you were sat, you started frantically going through your papers, most likely worried you forgot half of the information these people wanted from you.

"First time?" Lando was not usually chatty with strangers unless they addressed him first, which had been happening a lot lately. But there was something about .you Something in the way you shuffled so nervously.

His voice was thick with British accent, which was usually the thing that made you swoon. When you first looked at him, it overcame you a bit. He was undeniably gorgeous. One of those a bit out of reach. God, he could be a model. Knowing this city, he probably was.

"Yes, first time. There was a mistake done at my embassy, so now I have to try to fix it so that I can come home."

He nodded and you wondered why a guy like that would even care to speak to you. "Home, where is that?" he asked, cheeky look burning holes into you.

You chuckled. He knew where to aim to make it count. "Funny question...I'm currently on crossroads. If I say yes to a job offer, it could pretty much be on a different continent." Lando sensed you were avoiding specific answers and found it smart actually, many creepy people everywhere.

"Well, good luck with your decision. I'm sure that what is meant to be will come to you in the right time."

"Thank you...So what do you call home?" you returned the question.

"Huh. Probably my car," he said, surprising himself in the same way you got. "Yeah, that'll be it."

A nervous laugh escaped your lips. "Are you like homeless or something?" Wave of awkwardness rushed through you, but left as soon as he chuckled at your question.

"No, not really. Just on the road a lot," he said and leaned back in a relaxed way.

"Interesting. Never thought that people on road have to deal with visa."

"More than you'd think."

His number was called in from the office shortly after that. You glanced at him a gave him a small smile. He debated for a moment whether or not he should ask for your number. In the end, he didn't. The interaction was too brief. He was on the move constantly and found everything a little too overwhelming. Hadn't learned yet how to deal with it all. Took him two weeks to stop beating himself over chickening out. But then again, it would be another eight years before he learned your name.

//

Flashing lights, body on body, light smoke that helped to cover the tracks and the latest electronic track to cut through it all. You were in Ibiza, on a bachelorette party for one of your friends. Truth be told, you were not keen on tagging along. You weren't exactly besties with the bride to be, more a friend of a friend. But your big break up was almost seven months ago and the fact you were counting only proved you were not doing well. In fact, it was absolute torture. A trip to Ibiza seemed like a decent distraction from the emptiness that haunted you back home.

You'd separated from the group, perhaps the shots were little stronger than what you were used to. In the middle of the packed dance floor, you found peace. People swaying back and forth, heavy air making sure you all stayed intoxicated. The world was spinning when a pair of hands found you. You could only wonder whether he was as drunk as you were or more. But at that moment, you didn't. Your body reacted to his arms holding you and it was nice to actually feel another person so closely. Perhaps that's what you came for to this island, to find the inner passion for other people again. You weren't searching for love. And of course, you hadn't found it. Because, just when you finally turned around to lock your lips with the handsome, toned guy, Lando had just walked past you, trying to push through the crowd. While he searched for his friends, you searched for the anything that random guy might have had left unspoken on the tip of his tongue.

The headache that followed was more bearable than the heartbreak that pained you before. It's probably for the best you hadn't found Lando that night. You were not ready, not for another three years.

//

It's been quite some time since you loved someone with the kind of intensity that makes dancing in the rain sound like the best idea ever. The kind of love that people write albums about. There was still a glimmer of hope, but with every failed situationship, the hope was harder to search for. Maybe it was just not meant to be - and truth be told, life was actually pretty good. You had great friends, fun job and late twenties were looking great on you. You lost yourself in your thoughts for longer than was probably socially acceptable when one is at a wedding so prestigious as this one was. How you got there was also such a random coincidence, but suddenly you found yourself around a celebrity wedding, where there could have been around five hundred people.

It was a lot to handle in one evening and if you were completely honest, you did feel a little out of place. To regain some peace of mind and avoid a panic attack, you snuck out into the depths of the garden adjacent to the venue.

You walked for minutes, peace and solitude uninterrupted. That was until he spoke to you "for the first time". Neither of you remembering your previous encounters.

"Look, I know this is gonna sound cheesy, but hear me out," said the voice of a person, who at that time had no idea they would go on a disturb your peace for the rest of your life. You turned around, bit surprised someone also made it this far away from the rest of the attendees.

Lando took a quick breath and spoke again. "This is a really good light you have on right now, can I take a quick photo of you?" he said and waved around with his analogue camera. You examined the guy standing in front of you. One would have a hard time looking for someone more handsome than him. He stood there, giving off rather impatient vibe.

"Photo of me?" you asked, not believing you heard him correctly.

"Yes, please. The light is perfect and it'll soon be gone."

He was right about one thing, the sunset was making the sky and the whole garden shimmer with tones of pink one rarely sees in real life. You locked eyes with this strange person and saw a demanding look, begging you to allow him to capture the moment.

"Okey," you said in a low, unconfident tone. He smiled and it was like he just had a shot of espresso, energy flew right through him. His arms shot up and he started looking for the perfect frame.

"Wait, I don't know what to do..." you protested, not being used to getting photographed. For Lando, the occurance of a camera was so common, he didn't even think about it. He found your hesistance refreshing. He quickly snapped a picture, hoping it would capture your unease. Then he looked up from his camera to you again.

"You're perfect like that, don't worry," he assured you and looked for another angle. He was quickly becoming obsessed with the way how the light made your hair shine and a shadow highlighted the contour of your face. There was something he saw in you that night, something he would spend years trying to get into a picture and never getting it fully, at least in his opinion.

Lando found his perfect angle, but by that time your face became stiff, showing you really were not used to modeling. Once again, he looked up from his camera to courage you.

He smiled at you and the two of you locked eyes for longer than strangers usually do. "I'd love to see your smile," he said, hoping he'd loosen you up.

You were beyond nervous. Whatever you were was far apart from normal heart rate.

"Well then you're gonna have to tell me a joke," you said, not knowing where it came from.

"Don't worry, we can talk about my love life after the sunset," he said jokingly and to surprise of anyone who might have overheard, you laughed.

From that moment on, history wrote itself pretty quickly.

[libraryofgage]

Librarian Steve :)

Was talking to a friend about people (specifically this one kid that gives such Dustin energy hfjdks) I meet at work (I'm a librarian) and that evolved into this plot bunny so:

Librarian Steve, rock star Eddie, and the 5 times Steve pretends he doesn't know who Eddie is while they flirt + 1 time Steve reveals he knew about Eddie's rock star status the whole time

There is also, definitely, at some point, going to be a second part where the kids keep just barely missing Eddie and refuse to believe Steve is actually dating anyone but especially not Eddie Munson of all people

As always, if you see any typos, no you didn't

One

Steve stares at the man on the other side of the circulation desk. He's wearing a Metallica shirt, ripped jeans, a guitar pick necklace, clunky rings on each finger, and an expression that says he's bracing himself for something painful.

Here's the thing: Steve knows who Eddie Munson is. It's hard to listen to alternative rock or punk or any other genre like that and not know Eddie Munson. It's hard to be a librarian who works primarily with kids in middle school and high school, all going through that painful, angsty phase that they express through music, and not know Eddie Munson.

So, yeah, Steve takes one look at the admittedly (incredibly) attractive guy and immediately knows he's Eddie Munson. Like, of Corroded Coffin fame. Of Rock n Roll Hall of Fame fame. Of platinum-level album sales fame. Of--okay, his point has probably been made.

Anyway, yeah, Steve knows this is Eddie Munson, and while he'd love to say he's a fan and smile at Eddie and maybe ask for an autograph, Steve also grew up as a Small Town Rich Kid. So he knows that look on Eddie's face, the one that says he's bracing himself for someone to start fawning over him and potentially ask for uncomfortable favors or his number or any other request that's definitely crossing the line into invasive.

Steve easily makes the decision to pretend he doesn't recognize Eddie. So, he puts on his customer service smile and says, "Hello, how can I help you?"

The sheer relief in Eddie's eyes is more than enough to tell Steve he made the right choice. "Right, uh, this is my first time here," Eddie says, shifting slightly before placing his hands on the counter and drumming his fingers.

"Oh, congratulations," Steve says, his tone and smile becoming more genuine. "Did you come here to print something?"

Eddie shakes his head, reaches into his pocket, and pulls out a library card. "My friend has, like, a...hold? Yeah, a hold on something and asked me to pick it up," he explains.

Steve nods once and takes the card when Eddie offers it. He scans it and watches the computer load for a few seconds before opening an account window for someone named Asher Katz. "Since you aren't the cardholder," Steve says, navigating to the "Additional Information" tab in the account, "I'll need you to tell me the four-digit pin or code word connected to the account."

He clearly wasn't expecting that requirement, and Eddie flounders for a moment. "Is that a requirement?" he asks.

With an apologetic smile, Steve nods. "Yeah," he says, stretching out the word as he tries to think. "Oh, you could also call him and have him tell me the pin. Then I could confirm that it's okay for you to check out materials on his behalf."

"This is a lot of hoops for a book," Eddie says, frowning slightly as he takes out his phone.

"We have to make sure people's materials are secure. Also, we have to keep track of what people check out for the library's stats report at the end of each quarter."

Eddie looks like he understands about half of that, and Steve once again flashes an apologetic smile. After a few taps on the screen, Eddie glances around the library, ensuring it's empty, before putting the phone on speaker. The moment it picks up, and before Asher can speak, Eddie says, "Hey, man, I'm at the library. Can you tell, uh--" Eddie looks up to check Steve's nametag "--Steve what your pin is so I can check that book out."

A few seconds pass before Steve hears a sigh on the other end of the phone. "1234," Asher says.

"Seriously?" Eddie asks.

Steve glances at the account page, confirms the pin, and nods. "Could you also provide me with your code word?"

"Password."

"Dude!" Eddie says, staring at the phone like he's once again being reminded that his friend is a dumbass.

Steve checks the account again and nods once more. "Great, thank you. Could you confirm that...," Steve trails off, looking at Eddie expectantly.

Eddie blinks like he forgot Steve didn't know who he was and hesitates before clearing his throat and quietly saying, "Eddie."

"Thanks," Steve says, flashing another smile before looking at the phone and continuing, "Can you confirm that Eddie here is allowed to check out holds on your behalf?"

"Uh, yeah, that's fine, man."

"Great, thank you," Steve says, checking the card number once more before heading to the hold shelf behind the desk. He crouches and starts scanning stickers on the spines for Asher's last name and the last four digits of his number. Behind him, he hears Eddie say goodbye, his voice sounding a little strained for reasons Steve can't really figure out at the moment.

He finds the right book after a few moments and pulls it off the shelf. "Here it is," he says, walking over to the desk and pulling up the check-out window on his computer. He scans the library card once more, carefully pulls the sticker off the spine, and scans the book.

"It's due in two weeks, but if your friend needs more time, he can just give the library a call," Steve explains, passing the book and card back to Eddie with a smile. "Was there anything else I could do for you?"

Eddie just stares at him for a few seconds, his cheeks looking a little pinker than before, and Steve wonders if the building's A/C somehow gave up on life. Again. But he can hear it running so that definitely isn't it. "Uh, nope, that's it," Eddie says, gripping the book tightly in his hands, his rings pressing into the cover. "Thanks, Steve, appreciate it."

"Of course, man. Have a good day," Steve says with a genuine smile and wave as Eddie heads toward the door.

With a slightly awkward wave back, Eddie walks out the door, glancing back over his shoulder once before the door completely shuts. Once the library is empty again, Steve hears the door to the backroom open, and Robin practically slides up to the counter, leaning onto it next to him.

"Was that?" she asks. Steve instantly translates the question in his head: Was that Eddie fucking Munson?

"Yep."

"And did you?"

And did you just pretend you didn't know him?

"Yep."

"Did he?"

Did he catch on?

"Nope."

"Do you think?"

Do you think he'll be back?

Steve shrugs, glancing over at her. "Don't know," he says, pausing for a moment before adding, "He's hotter in person."

Robin barks out a laugh. "Maybe you'll actually get to flirt next time," she says, and Steve grins at her, kind of hoping she's right.

Two

Eddie returns exactly two weeks later, and Steve is lucky enough to once again be working a desk shift when he walks through the door. He's wearing a Nine Inch Nails shirt this time, and his hair is pulled back into a messy bun with strands escaping to frame his face. He goes up to the counter, focused on Steve and completely ignoring Robin sitting at another computer, and sets the book down. "I wanna return this. And get a library card for myself," he says.

Steve can't help a clearly amused smile as he takes the book and scans it in. "Do you have an ID with you?" he asks, sliding the book along the desk to rest next to Robin.

He ignores the glare she shoots at him before grabbing the book to place it on a reshelving cart for later.

"Yeah, do I need anything else?" Eddie asks.

As Steve shakes his head, he leans over to grab a library card application from a small organizer. He places it in front of Eddie and passes him a pen as well. "Just fill that out," he says, leaning forward on the counter as Eddie picks up the pen.

"So, uh, what can I do with a library card?" Eddie asks, glancing up at Steve briefly before focusing on carefully writing. His letters are blocky but awkward like he's consciously thinking about how he's writing each one.

Maybe he just doesn't want to risk his writing being recognized, too? From what Steve remembers of the signatures he's seen, Eddie's handwriting is fairly distinctive.

"You can borrow up to 75 materials at one time, place items on hold, use the computers, and you get one dollar of printing credit that renews each day," Steve lists, tilting his head slightly as he watches Eddie write.

"That's it?"

Steve snorts, raising an eyebrow at Eddie when he looks up. "Oh, that's not enough for you?" he asks, unable to help a slight grin, "You can use it at any library within our system, too. So you'll still have options if you get banned from this one."

"Oh? And what would I be banned for?" Eddie asks, his writing pausing long enough to meet Steve's gaze once more and smirk at him.

"I wonder," Steve says, not missing the way Eddie's gaze drops to his lips for less than a second before moving back up.

Holy shit, he's flirting with Eddie Munson.

"I can also help you find books to read based on what you've liked previously," Steve adds, somewhat clumsily pulling back from the flirting. It's only Eddie's second time here, and he doesn't want to let himself get too caught up in...well, Eddie when there's no guarantee he'll be back.

Eddie hums softly as he looks back at the application. "Oh? What would you recommend for me?" he asks.

"What's your favorite book?"

"The Hobbit."

"What did you like about it?"

"The adventure and the characters."

"Do you prefer fantasy? What about sci-fi?"

"Yeah, those are fine."

Steve hums softly, thinking as Eddie sets the pen down and slides the application to him. "Thanks. I also need to see your ID," Steve says, opening a drawer in the desk and pulling out a library card. He scans it, a new account window popping up and waiting to be filled out.

"What's the ID for?" Eddie asks.

"To confirm that you live in our service area," Steve explains, taking the ID when Eddie offers it. He glances at the photo briefly, confirming that it is, in fact, Eddie Munson, and then double-checks the address. It matches what Eddie wrote on the application, so he nods and slides the ID back to him.

"That's it?"

Steve nods, beginning to type Eddie's information into the account page. "Yeah, that's it," he says, glancing up and smiling at Eddie, "Anyway, I think you'll enjoy the Murderbot Diaries. It's about a cyborg that hacks its control module, thinks about maybe going on a killing spree, and then discovers TV instead. It then just goes on adventures through space while fighting, like, capitalism and corporations."

"Sounds pretty badass," Eddie says, leaning forward on the counter like he wants to get a peek at the computer. "How long is it?"

"It's mostly novellas, so they're quick reads."

"Got any copies here?"

Steve hums, entering the last of Eddie's information. "I can check," he says, "but first, I need a code word for your account. Like, if you forget your pin or have someone else come pick up a hold, this word will confirm it's you."

Eddie thinks for a few seconds, his gaze dropping to Steve's nametag once more. "Stevie," he says.

Steve's fingers falter, accidentally typing an incomprehensible key smash into the information field. He glances up at Eddie. "...as in Stevie Nix? Don't forget, this has to be something you'll remember," he says, raising an eyebrow.

With a playful grin and a wink, Eddie says, "Well, I think you're pretty unforgettable, Stevie."

A beat passes as Steve stares at Eddie, feeling a rush of heat to his cheeks. He clears his throat and looks back at the computer, hesitating for a second more before typing "Stevie" into the field and saving the account. When he's done, he slides the card to Eddie along with a Sharpie. "That's your card, please sign on the back."

He notices Eddie stiffen at the request, but Steve doesn't comment. As he instead searches the library's catalog, he tries to ignore the sheer panic coming from Eddie as he tries to figure out how to sign the card. Eventually, Eddie picks up the Sharpie and writes his name in the same awkward, blocky writing he used for the application.

"So," Steve says, getting Eddie's attention once more, "we don't have any copies of the first book here, but I can put it on hold for you. It should be here in around four days, and you'll get an email when it's available. Does that work?"

Eddie nods as he places the Sharpie down. "Sure, I'm happy to swing by and pick it up," he says, his tone and smile and the playful look in his eyes telling Steve there are more reasons than that for him to come by the library.

And as Steve places the book on hold for Eddie, he can't help a tiny, eager smile.

Three

The D8 sits innocently on the counter in front of Steve, marbled colors of blue and red with streaks of gold to complement the gold-painted numbers. Steve had immediately recognized it as Will's when he was cleaning the meeting room, and he knew the kid was probably losing his mind right now searching for it. He feels kind of bad knowing Will is going to lose all hope of finding it before his next visit to the library.

At the same time, though, he's looking forward to the expression of sheer joy on Will's face when he next comes in and Steve gives it back. Maybe it'll even score him a bonus point with Mike, and he'll be a little less of an asshole. Though, knowing Mike like he does, Steve is sure he'll just get jealous that Steve made Will smile like that instead of himself.

That kid is incredibly skilled at finding new grudges to hold.

"Whatcha got there, Stevie?"

Steve blinks, looking away from the D8 to find Eddie leaning on the counter, a familiar grin tugging at his lips. His hair is loose today, falling over his shoulders, and he's boldly wearing a Hellfire Club shirt, like he's confident that Steve won't recognize any of Corroded Coffin's merch.

Which, sure, Steve is great at pretending by now. Especially after he and Robin made a bet on whether Steve could keep the secret until Eddie asked him out. Steve has incredible faith in himself; Robin says he's too dumb and gay to last that long. So far, after around two months and multiple visits from Eddie, Steve is still going strong.

"A D8," Steve says, holding it between his thumb and forefinger so Eddie can see it clearly. "One of the kids left it behind yesterday."

"They were playing D&D here?" Eddie asks, tilting his head slightly as he holds his hand out.

Steve drops the dice into his hand, watching as Eddie inspects the gold numbers and hums softly with appreciation. "I host a weekly D&D program," Steve explains. "A group of regular kids plays, and they were getting a little disruptive when they played in the common area--" Steve gestures to the cluster of tables where the kids used to set up "--and the program gives them the meeting room for a whole afternoon."

Eddie looks up at him like he's just said he's a volunteer firefighter on the weekends. It's not an awe and appreciation that Steve really deserves, but he also can't help the slight puff of his chest when it's coming from Eddie. "Do you play, too?" Eddie asks.

"Sort of?" Steve frowns slightly, trying to remember how Dustin and Will explained his role during the campaign to him. "I'm, like, extras. Their DM, Will, wanted his, uh, NPCs? Yeah, NPCs. He wanted the NPCs to feel more real, so he'll give me, like, a little script before each session and then have me voice the NPCs and give me signals to guide my interactions."

"Signals?"

"Yeah, like, if I'm a shop owner and the characters bargain for stuff. He'll give me a signal of when their, like, rolls are effective or when they suck. And if I'm a villain NPC, he'll give me a signal of when to die and give dramatic monologues," Steve explains.

And Eddie grins again, his eyes practically sparkling with amusement and curiosity. "I kinda wanna hear a dramatic monologue," he says, propping his chin in his palm and looking at Steve expectantly.

He's clearly settled in to watch a show, and Steve isn't one to disappoint. Steve does a quick sweep of the library and confirms that it's just as empty as he remembers. Then, he sits up a little straighter in his chair, clears his throat, and tries to remember his whole dying monologue from the most recent session.

When he speaks, it's with a raspy voice, laced with pain and anger at being defeated, "Curse you, adventurers! You may have won the battle, but the war! The war yet rages, and you will be caught in its carnage! Savor this victory now, for it will be your last, and you will fa-"

Steve cuts off, grinning when Eddie blinks and pouts. "Why'd you stop?" he asks.

"Mike's character killed me before I could finish. Said my monologue was boring."

Eddie snorts, raising an eyebrow at that. "It sounds like your monologue was going to reveal info about the BBG."

"Yep. It was, but Will refused to tell them what the rest would've been, and Dustin threw his dice at Mike for killing me."

"He's lucky it was only that," Eddie says, completely serious, "I might've just killed him."

Steve can't help laughing, imagining Max leaping over the table to tackle Mike to the floor. She's done it before, actually, and the only thing that keeps her from attacking again is the knowledge that Steve will ban her from the library for at least a month if she gets violent again.

"He's lucky none of them want to be temporarily banned," Steve says.

"Oh? That's all it takes to get banned?" Eddie asks.

Steve smirks at the teasing lift to Eddie's question. "Yep, so you'd better watch yourself, Munson. I expect you to be on your best behavior," he says.

"I've never been very good at behaving."

"Great, you'll fit right in with the kids."

He looks up to see Eddie's smile growing wider, and Steve suddenly finds himself wondering how it would feel to kiss that smile away.

Four

Something library school never prepared Steve for is how overwhelmed certain days would make him. That's the thing about working with the public: some days are just never-ending, a line of patrons needing something practically wrapping through the stacks, meaning Steve can't turn off his customer service voice and smile.

Usually, he'll just escape to the back, lock himself in the employee bathroom, and take five minutes to cool down. Robin has gotten great at knocking on the door when the five minutes is up, pretending she needs to use the bathroom so the other staff members don't suspect Steve of breathing away a breakdown.

Today, though, Steve can't hide in the bathroom because of the music Robin is playing in the back. It's grating on his ears, scratching against his brain and down his spine like nails on a chalkboard, made all the worse by his interactions with an older patron with a voice that was rough and somehow rounded with sharp edges at the same time.

If Steve asked, Robin would definitely turn off the music, but he also saw her tense shoulders, how on edge she was, and how the music was the only thing helping her calm down. So Steve couldn't. Instead, he just said he was going to shelf-read the non-fiction section.

Because nobody goes into the non-fiction section. At least, nobody goes to the part of the section filled with encyclopedias. It's a safe corner, tucked into the back of the library where few people wander unless they're desperate for an outdated book of information that has no real bearing on their life.

So here Steve is, sitting on the floor with his knees pulled up to his chest and his eyes closed. This part of the library is quieter, but he can still hear the general ambiance of the building: people talking in hushed voices, the keyboards clicking as people type, chairs scraping against the floor as people pull them out.

And quiet footsteps coming closer. They're accompanied by the gentle sound of metal bouncing against itself. Steve doesn't open his eyes, but he does know that it's Eddie, and he's not at all surprised that Eddie managed to find him deep in the stacks.

It makes him feel a little warm, actually.

When Eddie reaches him, he doesn't speak. He just sits next to Steve, close enough for Steve to feel his presence without their shoulders touching. And he seems content to stay in silence for as long as needed, but Steve doesn't want silence. He wants to hear Eddie's voice; maybe it will override the discomfort of the music and the patron from earlier.

"Could you talk?" Steve asks, his voice soft and barely audible.

But Eddie hears him and scoots a tiny bit closer, letting their shoulders brush.

"I have opinions about library shelving because of you now. Like, why are science fiction and fantasy shelved together as one category? They're two different genres; they represent different things. One is a reflection of our society and all that it could be, an escape into something new, and the other is a reflection of what our society was through the eyes of a new world. And, like, it's not even the ones you think. They both embody different lessons and values and pairing them together is, like, demeaning to the hallmarks of the genres and what they can do for readers."

Yeah, that definitely sounds like an opinion about library shelving and cataloging. Steve can't help a soft laugh escaping him as he finally opens his eyes and looks at Eddie. "What started this?" he asks.

"There are Star Trek novels right next to, like, Seven Blades in Black on the shelves, Stevie. It's horrendous. What the fuck?"

Steve smiles a little, gently knocking their elbows together. "Unfortunately, I can't control how our cataloging department works," he says.

"Sounds like a skill issue to me," Eddie says, "Maybe you should just get good."

Steve barks out a laugh, covering his mouth with his hand at how loud it sounds. He glares at Eddie, his eyes holding no real heat.

Eddie grins right back and leans in a little closer. "Feeling better, sweetheart?" he asks, his voice soft and gentle and brushing against Steve's brain like a cool stream of water on a hot day.

It makes his shoulders relax, something in his stomach uncurling and draining all the tension from his muscles. "Yeah," he replies, "thanks."

"Anytime, Stevie," Eddie says, smiling at Steve like he's capable of hanging stars in the sky, like he'd do a backflip with a broken spine if Steve asked.

And Steve...Steve finds himself getting lost in Eddie's eyes, and he has no plans to find his way out anytime soon.

Five

Most of the library staff hates reshelving books, but Steve loves it. He doesn't have to use his brain beyond remembering the alphabet, and he can listen to music while he works, easily zoning out so the time passes quickly.

Which is what's happening now. He's probably been shelving for a while, but he's been listening to a Corroded Coffin playlist the entire time, humming along to Hellfire and Chains. His head is bobbing along to the music as he works, and he turns to grab another book off the reshelving cart only to find Eddie standing right behind him.

Steve jumps, his heart leaping into his throat as he chokes on air and Corroded Coffin notes. Eddie is staring at him with wide eyes, somewhere between afraid and infatuated, and Steve can't help asking, "What the fuck, man?" in a whispered voice.

"Whatcha listening to, Stevie?" Eddie asks, ignoring Steve's question.

Oh. If he admits to knowing Corroded Coffin's music, then he'll probably be giving up the whole "I know you're famous" thing, and based on Eddie's somewhat terrified look, that's not a great idea right now. But he also can't lie about the music because Eddie's going to recognize his own songs.

"Uh, Corroded Coffin, I think? I heard Lucas playing one of their songs. It sounded catchy and he sent me a playlist he'd made on Spotify," Steve explains.

It's not a lie, technically. That is how he discovered Corroded Coffin, but that was almost two years ago now.

"And, uh, what do you think?" Eddie asks, glancing at the earbuds still playing in Steve's ear.

Steve studies him for a moment before smiling. "They're really good," he says, turning around to continue shelving books. "I like stuff from their second album best so far."

"Do you usually listen to metal and rock?" Eddie asks, glancing at the shelving cart before passing Steve another book.

Steve almost tells Eddie to let him do the shelving, but then he sees that Eddie passed him the correct book for this section, so he bites back the words. Instead, he nods and crouches to slide the book into a bottom shelf. "Yeah. More older stuff, I guess. Guns N' Roses, Metallica, Nine Inch Nails, Queen. That kind of stuff," he says.

"Holy fuck, you're perfect," Eddie says, his voice soft and full of awe and Steve is about to laugh when Eddie adds, "Marry me."

Steve blinks, nearly losing his balance and falling on his ass. He saves himself at the last minute, quickly standing up again so he can look at Eddie. "Seriously?" he asks, wondering if maybe he had just misheard.

He did not. And this is proven by Eddie moving around the shelving cart, grabbing Steve's hand, and getting down on one knee. "Incredibly. Your music taste is fucking immaculate, sweetheart. Also, you're funny, hot, and sweet, and I've recently developed a librarian kink, I think. So. Marry me," Eddie says before using his teeth to pull off one of the chunky rings on his left hand so his right hand doesn't have to let go of Steve.

He then holds the ring up, and Steve really shouldn't find that as hot as he does. Like. Really hot. And he almost considers saying yes. But then he fully processes Eddie's words and almost laughs. "You've developed a librarian kink? So, what, you'll drop me the moment another librarian starts ranting about the Dewey Decimal system?" he asks.

"Okay, fair," Eddie says, nodding once. "Let me rephrase that. I've developed a Librarian Steve Harrington kink. Only you, big boy. Nobody curses out the Dewey Decimal system like you, sweetheart."

That might be the most romantic thing anyone has ever said to Steve, actually. "It's a shitty cataloging system," he says without thinking.

Eddie nods in agreement, still on one knee, still holding up the ring (it's shaped like a coffin, now that Steve spares it more than a quick glance) and still looking up at Steve with an infatuated smile. "It is," he agrees, voice a little softer than before like he's ready to just kneel through Steve's passionate rant about it.

And Steve thinks that might be the final straw for him. "I'd prefer at least one date before marriage," he says, grinning down at Eddie and pulling him back to his feet.

Eddie follows his lead, standing a little too close considering Steve is, technically, still at work. He turns Steve's hand over so it's palm up and drops the ring into it. "Of course, Stevie. How about lunch tomorrow? My treat," he offers.

Of course, Steve says yes.

+ One

"I still think there are funnier ways to tell him," Robin says, crossing her arms and pouting as Steve leans against the counter, his back to the door.

Steve sticks his tongue out at her. "You're just mad you lost the bet," he says. Telling her she lost had made Steve's entire week, especially since it means Robin is finally (finally!) going to dress up with Steve the next time they go to a basketball game together. He's got a jersey and shorts ready for her; he's had them ready since the first game he invited her to. They have her name across the back, are the ugliest shade of mustard yellow he could find, and match his perfectly.

"That jersey is the work of the devil," she says, her nose scrunching in disgust at the thought of it.

Steve just grins. "You never know, maybe a nice girl will be enraptured by your awkward lesbian swag," he says.

Robin is about to answer when she looks over Steve's shoulder and grins, her eyes lighting up. Steve looks over his shoulder to see Eddie smiling at him. "Hey, Stevie," he says.

And here it is. The moment of truth. Steve grins right back at Eddie and turns around, letting him see the graphic on his shirt. It's one he bought at a Corroded Coffin concert a year ago. It has the band's first album cover emblazoned across it with Eddie front-and-center, playing his guitar with the other band members around him as bats swirl in a red haze above their heads.

Eddie stares at the shirt, his smile freezing on his face and his body tensing. Panic starts to fill his eyes, and he glances up, looking ready to explain himself only to stop when he sees Steve's soft, endeared smile. He pauses, studying Steve's expression for a moment before laughing a little awkwardly and tugging on a lock of his hair, using it to cover his mouth. "So, uh, you knew the whole time," he says.

"Yep," Steve replies, leaning forward on the counter so it's harder for Eddie to avoid looking at him. "I did."

"Why didn't you say anything?" Eddie asks.

"You didn't want me to," Steve says. Then he considers his words and corrects, "Or, you didn't want to be recognized. When you first came in, you were bracing yourself for it, and I figured you'd feel more comfortable if I pretended not to know you."

"What about all the other times?"

Steve shrugs, his smile becoming reassuring. "I figured you'd either tell me when you were ready, or I'd tell you when we went on a date because you'd probably get all in your head about having a secret like that while we were dating."

And Steve is right. Eddie would have freaked out over the secret, and he would have struggled with telling Steve at just the right moment, and time would have stretched on and on until it had been too long to tell him anything. It would have been agony for Eddie and left Steve concerned and just not a good time for anyone.

"So, uh, how long have you been a fan?" Eddie asks.

"Well, I wasn't lying about hearing your music from Lucas, but I did lie about the time. It was two years ago," Steve explains.

Eddie slowly nods and then starts to grin. "So, how's it feel dating a celebrity?" he asks playfully, leaning closer and wiggling his eyebrows at Steve.

"Like a Wattpad fantasy come true," Steve deadpans, nearly cracking when he hears Robin lose her shit behind him, her laughter turning into wheezes within seconds.

Eddie laughs, too. It's loud and bright and makes Steve feel warm and happy, like every problem could be solved simply by making Eddie laugh just like this.

Steve is eager to find out if that's true.

[sentientfunfetti]

Yandere! Actor Wally, please...

possessive actor!wally/reader hcs

(actor wally and his au was made by @/frillsand on tumblr! go support their work!)

REBLOGS AND FEEDBACK APPRECIATED!

CW// POSSESSIVE THEMES

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of course, like any other version of him, this one would be very cautious and closed off at first. he wouldn’t share much with you and if he does it’s brief, but after you ‘prove yourself’ to him he immediately becomes attached to you. he's absolutely stuck by you. you're just his assistant but he falls hard. harder than he ever has.

seeing as how you’re the first person to ever see him for who he is, he lets you get away…with a lot. it’s all bias of course, and you may not even use it but you start to notice that your small mistakes barely go noticed. he doesn't even allow anyone else to scold you either. you can tell that his patience is still thin, however.

he values your time with him. in his downtime he’s hellbent on spending time with you and you only, even if this means dragging you along on subtly planned ‘lunch breaks’ with him. (these are dates) or calling you for petty tasks he could have easily done himself just to see you.

he likes spoiling you, and that becomes very obvious very fast. he loves it when you tell him ‘thank you’ for buying you lunch or getting you coffee. he goes from sending you in to get these things for him to go in with you, bringing his bodyguards along.

you take up so much of his mind he starts to stumble in rehearsal. this actually frustrates him at first. he takes his frustration out on you a tad before finally cooling down.

practically demands all of your attention. he goes to you for just about everything. input, script reading, any excuse to see you. any excuse to get closer. he hates the fact that you two have such a professional relationship and wants to be more, even if that means breaking a few rules. it's not like you're a fan, you're his assistant. no harm done.

ignores fanmail entirely. when you ask why he brushes it off the way he usually does. "why would i want a bunch of strangers telling me what i already know?". the truth is very different, however. he secretly wishes to be praised by you and you only.

speaking of, he may not show it but he soaks up any and all praise you give him and internalizes it almost immediately. no matter how small. he loves it when you compliment him.

it's hard to keep his cool when he sees you getting the same treatment from others, however. he silently watches from the corner, fuming. how dare they. until he can muster up the courage to fully compliment you himself, he glares daggers at people who do. repeat offenders get fired and blacklisted from acting entirely.

he is not above blackmail to get his way. not to you, no of course not! other people, however? free game. he has dirt on just about everyone. they don't even know.

even though he has a tendency of doing horrible things to get his way, he always tries to steer away from that entirely. he keeps trying to convince himself that he’s above that and he’s a changed man. unfortunately, you make that a bit hard with how many other people you seem to attract every other day.

appreciates your patience with him most of all. set aside the fact you're not weird about the fact that he's a puppet like most people, he loves your kind heart and wants to protect that, even if that means burning bridges to see more of you. he craves intimacy with you. he hates how weak you make him feel, but he can't help but let all of those walls come crumbling down when you're that nice to him.

isn't good with physical contact at first, so he sticks to small things: 'accidental' brushes against you, linking pinkies with you, shoving you along. he’s experimenting, give him time.

drags you along to rehearse his lines. he loves using his 'deadlines' as an excuse to get your help. he knows he could ask anyone else but why would he? you say yes every time anyway because that's how nice you are. he absolutely loves the scenes where he gets to subtly flirt with you. did the script call for improv? ssssh. doesn't matter. your red face makes it all worth it in the end.

is not above using the character he's playing mannerisms to get his way. he knows he's good at what he does, and he knows he's adorable. he uses this to his advantage, even incorporating past character's mannerisms into his own when he notices people stick to them. this includes you. if he notices you like a certain thing about a character he's playing he is quick to pick up on this and use that against you.

in the end, his end goal is for you to date, and maybe be something more in the future. he's willing to do whatever that takes, even if that means working on himself more just to make sure you're more comfortable with the idea of dating. has no issue with having a 'secret' relationship if that's what you want.

isn't much of a pet name person but he would call you 'hun' sarcastically at first but over time it would become a genuine pet name for him.

if you two do something together then expect that to be something you two do together. he would get upset at people who try and 'butt in' in the things you two do together. those things are for you two and you two only. certified gatekeeper.

author’s note ⊹˚. ♡

funny thing! i actually got two requests to do this guy!

it was a bit hard to do seeing as how i don’t really know much about the au, but thank you for requesting it anyway! (both of you LMFAO). i have a few more planned, and two more requests to do. i’m still working on my reboot wally/reader fic so if i seem a bit slow that’s why. please be patient. i already have the outlines and things like that made for the requests i’ve gotten.

thanks for the request, neighbor!

[hwanghyunjinenthusiast]

Between the pages

AN: Shoutout to Indigo for violently thrusting me back into my Namjoon feelings. This has been a long time in the making.

Synopsis: If anyone asks, Professor Kim is definitely not crushing on the pretty librarian he spends all of his free time with on campus.

Heads up: Kim Namjoon x Fem! Reader, friends to lovers, so much pining, Non-Idol AU, University professor! Namjoon, Librarian! Reader, Reader wears glasses and Namjoon thinks it's hot, alcohol and alcohol consumption, Reader kisses Namjoon without his explicit consent at first, dirty talk, fingering (f. receiving), Reader sucks on Namjoon's fingers post fingering, praise kink (f. receiving), unprotected piv sex and creampie.

Word count: 4535

I will block you if you are a minor and/or have no easily visible indication of your age on your blog if you interact with me in any way.

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Namjoon tries to convince himself that the reason a smile immediately graces his face when he enters his department's library is because of his love for knowledge. That's it. That's all.

It definitely has nothing to do with getting the opportunity to see and talk to the very attractive head librarian. Nope. Nothing of the sort.

"What's got you all smiley? Found a new favourite philosophy journal?"

Namjoon studiously ignores the way his heart stutters in his chest. He turns around to face you directly and is once again caught off-guard at how ridiculously attractive you manage to look in a simple pencil skirt and flowy blouse. Your glasses framing your warm eyes, and your glossed lips quirked upwards in amusement.

God, he had it so bad.

"Am I not allowed to simply smile for the sake of smiling?" He asks with a grin of his own, the two of you seamlessly falling into step as you make your way to your office where he was initially headed.

"Answering a question with a question is deflection, Professor Kim," you respond with a good-natured poke to his arm. He jokingly rubs the spot, "Violence and referring to me as Professor Kim? Y/n I thought we were friends. I'm hurt."

He doesn't miss the way you roll your eyes with that unfairly pretty smile on your face as you hold your office door open for him, "I never took you to be one for dramatics, Namjoon."

Namjoon feels little better than a schoolboy with his first crush. Warmth flooding his face at the way you say his name. He just hopes his body wouldn't hate him enough to make his blush obvious or, you'd give him the curtsey of not mentioning it.

"Clearly you don't know me all that well then, Miss y/l/n. Seems like all this hiding out in each others' offices might've been for nothing," he retorts, making himself comfortable on the lounge chair by the window you'd both unofficially agreed upon was his. He tries not to think too deeply about that.

Typically you'd join him by the window, but you opt to prop yourself up on your desk, and Namjoon's tongue turns to sand in his mouth. Your already figure-hugging skirt sits tighter on your hips and thighs somehow, even riding up enough for Namjoon to feel the need to take a generous sip from his trusted water bottle.

"Wow really? My surname? Now you're being petty, Joon," you say before taking your first bite of your lunch.

It had become a habit for the two of you to meet for lunch whenever possible. Usually alternating between offices or whoever was closer to the other's side of the campus on a particular day. Namjoon thinks it's partly during these lunch sessions that the seeds of his feelings for you were planted. Though he hasn't quite decided how to unpack that can of worms yet, he wouldn't trade these moments with you for the world.

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Namjoon can't stand these end of year functions, but he attends because he knows it'd be a terrible look if he didn't. He does have other people in the department he's friendly with, but they definitely don't outweigh how tedious these functions can be.

He's standing somewhat awkwardly in the back of the room nursing a glass of juice (because of fucking course they wouldn't be serving any alcohol) when he first spots you. Namjoon knows you're beautiful. It's a fact that he's violently reminded of every time he sees you. However, he's never seen you like this. He thought your pencil skirts were form-fitting, but the way the red dress you're wearing now cups your ass and hugs your hips has the blood rushing to his dick at record-breaking speed. He's never seen so much of you at once, a hint of cleavage peaking out and the dress coming to a stop mid-thigh. To make it all worse (or better, depending on one's perspective), you're still wearing your glasses.

Namjoon is just happy he hasn't spontaneously combusted yet, honestly.

The bright smile that spreads across your face when you spot him and make your way over to him makes him feel more nervous than he has in ages. Which is saying something considering how tongue-tied he gets around you in general.

"Joon, thank god. I'm so happy you're here. These functions are always so boring," you say as you pull him into a hug. Instinctively, he wraps an arm around you, his body moving before his brain can fully process you pressed against him and your perfume invading his senses. God, you smell delicious.

"I'm glad to see you too. Yeah, I've been entertaining myself with a glass of juice for the past 30ish minutes. Having the time of my life," he responds sarcastically but makes sure he's not loud enough for anyone to hear him other than you. These functions may suck, but Namjoon has no desire to sour his relationships with his colleagues.

The mischievous smile that graces your face makes his palms sweat, "Want to get out of here? I have a bottle of wine I've been saving in my office."

"Wine in your office? That's pretty unprofessional of you, Miss Librarian," he responds with a grin.

"Well, I've been keeping it for a time like this. Unless you're content to sip on juice all night and make small talk about semester plans," you retort, mirth twinkling in your eyes.

"It has been almost 2 hours, so it wouldn't be a bad look if we excused ourselves now..." he reasons, and honestly he could use a drink right now.

"Glad to see you're on board. You're always so serious and responsible, I'm a little surprised you agreed," you say with a small snort, grabbing his arm and steering him towards the door.

You two say goodnight to everyone who crosses your path, and Namjoon resists the urge to roll his eyes at the grins and thumbs ups that Hoseok and Seokjin give him.

"I'm not that uptight," he argues a little defensively when you two are finally by yourselves.

"There's nothing wrong with being responsible. It's a big reason why I think you're such a loved and respected professor. I just think you could stand to let go sometimes," you say and, Namjoon's heart is trying its best to beat out of his chest.

You think he's loved and respected? You think he's a good professor?

He knows he doesn't need your validation, but it means the world to him all the same. The genuine sincerity and concern in your voice making it challenging for him to find his words.

"I plan to let go a little tonight. I think you're a bad influence," he jokes, playfully shoving you with his arm.

"I'm a fantastic influence. That's why you spend so much time with me," you retort with another one of those cute, amused snorts. Unlocking the door to the library when you two arrive quicker than Namjoon expected.

"I spend so much time with you because Hoseok's unending optimism and positivity drains my energy," he fires back, closing the door behind him once you enter the library before him.

"Hoseok's a sweetheart. You're just grumpy and overly jaded," you respond, leading the way to your office.

He tries not to feel too jealous hearing you refer to Hoseok as a sweetheart. You're not wrong. It's fair to refer to him as such, but it's still not exactly pleasant to hear.

"Me? Grumpy? Overly jaded? I'm delightful!" He says in mock offence, settling himself in his chair and watching you pull out the bottle of wine and two coffee mugs. Biting back a groan when he takes in how amazingly your dress hugs your ass.

"I never said you weren't delightful. I wouldn't be offering my treasured wine stash to you if I didn't at the bare minimum like you," you argue with a light laugh as you fill up your respective mugs.

"You just used the wine to bribe me to sneak out with you. I'm flattered nonetheless," he says with a laugh of his own, graciously accepting the generously filled mug you offer. He's severely unprepared for you to take a seat on the arm of his chair, your thigh brushing against him as you get comfortable.

Namjoon is starting to think this isn't a smart idea after all.

"Have you spending time with Seokjin? Is that why you've been so theatrical lately?" You ask with a smile before taking a generous sip from your mug, your pleased hum affecting him more than it had any right to.

"I'm just seeing this for what it is," he says, taking a swing from his own mug. Sweet. Seems like you enjoy your rosé. He makes a note of that for any future gifts.

"Sure, Joon," you respond, patting his shoulder. Taking another sip from your glass, licking your lips to chase the remnants of the wine. The wine is only worsening the hazy sensation he feels seeing the action and the slight smudging of your lipstick.

"Your lipstick looks nice," he spits out and immediately cringes at himself. Resisting the urge to rest his face in his hands as warmth floods his face. What the fuck was wrong with him? Surely it wasn't the singular sip of wine he took.

"Oh," you say, sounding surprised, "Thank you. You know I'm not one for make-up, but I thought why not since it's a special occasion. I'm glad you like it. I didn't take you for one to notice," you finish, playfully nudging his arm with your thigh.

Namjoon takes a generous sip of his wine before responding.

"I always notice these kinds of things when it comes to you and, you look pretty," he says before panicking at the implications of his words, "Not that you don't look pretty without the lipstick. You look pretty all the time. It's just-"

"I got it, Joon," you laugh, taking a drink from your own mug, and Namjoon definitely doesn't notice how appealing your neck looks. He needs to get his shit together. He's too old to be this flustered talking to a pretty woman. Well, you're more than just that, but that's besides the point.

"I'm flattered that you think I'm pretty. I didn't know you thought of me that way," you say so quietly that Namjoon has to strain to hear you. You look almost...shy? Completely unlike the sarcastic, confident woman he's become familiar with. It's cute. You're cute.

"I think you're beautiful honestly but, it's not exactly like I can just drop it in casual conversation," he says, surprised by his own confidence but, he's already called you pretty. What more does he have to lose?

"Kim Namjoon, are you flirting with me?" You ask with a smile behind your mug, but he can still see what he thinks is shyness in your expression.

"Is it so bad to flirt with the prettiest librarian on campus?" He asks, taking satisfaction in the stunned look on your face, your lips parting as you sit there just staring at him.

He watches you flounder with your words, a very private part of him enjoying being the one to fluster you for once.

"You think I'm the prettiest librarian on campus?" You ask quietly, as if you can't quite believe what's he saying to you right now. In your defence, he can't quite believe what he's saying to you right now either. He has the feeling that he's reached a crossroads now. Whatever he says to you now might change the nature of your relationship entirely, and Namjoon is tired of being a coward.

"I think you're the prettiest librarian I've ever met," he says with so much seriousness that there's no possible way you could misunderstand his words for lighthearted bantering. His heart bouncing off the walls of his chest as he waits for you to say something. Anything.

"Namjoon," is all you seem to muster at the moment, wide eyes still locked on him.

"You don't have to reciprocate my feelings, y/n. I've liked you for some time now, but I'd never put my feelings before yours and before this friendship. You mean too much for me to do that. I'm so sorry if I made you uncomfortable -" you promptly shut Namjoon up by cupping his face and pressing a searing kiss to his lips.

Well, it seems like it's his turn to be stunned.

His eyes widen as you seemingly pour everything you have into his kiss, your hold on his face tightening momentarily before you pull away. All Namjoon can do is stare at you. Looking unfairly attractive as you struggle to catch your breath and your glasses look slightly askew.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have just kissed you. I just-I couldn't find the words to tell you that I like you too in the moment. I'm sorry," you say in a single breath, and Namjoon has to strain to catch all of your words. However, panic hits him when your words do finally register.

"No, hey, it's okay. I was just surprised, is all. It's not every day the woman of your dreams kisses you. Give a guy a minute to recover," he jokes, reaching for your smaller hand and giving it a reassuring squeeze. Your hand squeezes his back, and frankly, Namjoon is just impressed that he's managed to remain conscious through this all.

"Woman of your dreams? Namjoon, please," you whine somewhat embarrassed, and that just endears you to him more.

"It's true," he says and means ever word of it.

"If you keep looking at me like that and speaking like that, I might just have to kiss you again," you respond playfully, resting your mug on the small coffee table.

"Is that a promise?" He fires back with a grin of his own, following suit.

"You're so annoying," you retort with an affectionate eye roll before you press your lips against his once more. This time, he's better prepared and more than ready to reciprocate. One of his hands tentatively resting on your thigh as angle yourself better to deepen the kiss. The feeling of your tongue against his own sending sparks down his spine. Arousal pooling in his gut, fed by all the little moans and whimpers you let out.

"Is this okay?" You ask breathlessly when you straddle him, your chair barely big enough to fit the two of you, but Namjoon isn't going to complain any time soon. Your soft thighs press against his and he's almost completely certain that your panty covered pussy is pressing against him.

"Yeah," his brain pulls itself together enough to spit out before weaving his fingers into your hair and, tugging you down for another earth-shattering kiss. Months' worth of desire and frustration pouring out of him. His other hand tentatively holding your hip in place all while he hopes his erection isn't too obvious to you.

He can tell the moment you feel it because you still against him momentarily. "Shit, I'm sorry. We don't have to do anything you don't want. It's just a natural reaction-"

"Joon, breathe. It's okay," you giggle, pressing a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth. "I want this. I'm just as excited as you are," you breathe, taking his much bigger hand in yours and guiding it up your ridiculously soft thighs. A quiet moan falling from your lips when his fingertips make contact with your wet panties.

Namjoon wonders what heroic acts he committed in his past lives to find himself here.

"You're already so wet," he breathes, fingers lightly running along your slit. Lidded eyes taking in the way your lips part to let out moans and your hips buck into his touch. Your fingernails digging into his shoulder when he's certain he's found your clit and uses that information to his advantage.

"You don't have to ah say that out loud, y'know," you respond, but any sarcasm that would typically be present in your voice is replaced by breathy whimpers. Namjoon thinks he much prefers them. As much as your quick-wit is one of his favourite aspects of your personality, he's finding that he immensely enjoys rendering you speechless.

"Why not, baby? You are so wet for me already, though. I could always stop," he trails off, stopping the movement of his fingers and keeping them pressed against you. A smirk spreading across his face when you whine and squirm in his lap.

"You're being mean," and fuck if the desperate edge to your voice doesn't shoot straight to his dick. Deciding to be merciful this time around, his fingers continue rubbing over your wet slit over your panties. Kissing along your jaw and neck as you whimper and grind against him in search of friction.

"Joon, please. Touch me di-directly," you hiccup, pressing yourself firmly against his fingers. Your nails digging into his shoulders. He had no idea you'd be so needy and desperate. He briefly wonders if you're always like this or if this is all because of him. His self-esteem certainly hopes it's the latter.

"You're so cute when you're needy," he rumbles against your throat, canines brushing the skin there while his fingers push your panties to the side. He thinks he'll remember the strangled gasp that flies from your lips when his fingers make contact with your clit as long as he lives.

He knew you were wet before, but he's severely unprepared for the effect feeling said wetness for himself has on him. His cock already leaking pre-cum where it rests untouched underneath you. Teasing you is a double-edged sword. You're not the only one becoming desperate here.

"Namjoon," you whine, "Please, please let me feel your fingers. It hurts. Please-" your begging is cut off by a sharp moan when he finally concedes and pushes two fingers inside of you. How can he say no when you sound so beautiful for him? He's just a man.

He tugs you into another messy kiss while he fucks you on his fingers to distract himself. He feels like he'll lose his mind soon if he doesn't feel you around his cock soon. Groaning into your mouth at how harshly your velvety walls grip his fingers as he familiarises himself with the spots that make you moan louder and hold onto him tighter.

The whimper you press against his lips when his thumb finds your clit and rubs slow circles against it is immaculate. In the dead of night when he'd fantasised about having you like this, he hadn't considered how sensitive and pliant you are. Reality is significantly better than any of his dreams.

"Joo-Joon, I- ah I'm," you whine out, your glasses slightly skewed and foggy on your face while you ride his fingers and chase your release. Namjoon doesn't think he's seen anything more erotic in his entire life.

"Are you going to cum for me?" The gruff edge to his voice or perhaps the question seems to do it for you because before he knows it you're holding onto to him for dear life and he has to slot his mouth over yours to silence your suddenly sharp cries. His cock pulsing as he feels your walls hold onto his fingers so tightly that he can barely move them anymore and, your wetness drips down his palm.

"That's a good girl. You did so well for me," he says, kissing your neck and shoulder softly as he waits for you to come back to him. He takes notice of the way your walls momentarily clench from what he assumes is the praise. Well. He'd happily give you all the praise you wanted.

"You're ridiculously good with your fingers," you mutter, cupping his face and kissing him as though you have all the time in the world. Something dangerously close to love for you swells in him from the affection you pour into the kiss. You rest your forehead against his when you pull away, a small smile playing on your bruised lips.

"Thank you," is all his brain can come with right now with his fingers still nestled inside of you and being harder than he ever has been in his entire life.

"Would it be okay if I sucked you off?"

You're trying to kill him. This is what this is. An elaborate plot to end his life in an instant.

His cock very much likes the sound of that, however.

"You don't have to do that,"

"I know. I want to,"

He closes his eyes and tries to gain his bearings for a few seconds.

"Maybe next time. I don't want to cum in your mouth right now,"

The pout on your lips is surprising and unfairly attractive, "Why not?"

You really were going to make him spell it out for you, aren't you?

"I'd rather cum while I'm inside of you,"

His jaw clenches when he feels your walls clamp down on his fingers once more, a barely there whimper falling from your lips, "Kim Namjoon, you're going to be the death of me."

Funny you should say that because the feeling is mutual.

He does laugh at that. Pressing a kiss against your cheek, "And you think I'm dramatic. We can just stop here if you don't want to. Plus, I don't have any condoms on hand. I wasn't exactly...anticipating all of this."

"What in the world would make you think I'd want to stop now?" You ask, sounding genuinely baffled, "And on the topic of birth control, I'm on the pill."

His eyes close then, and he can't bite back a groan. You would really let him fuck you raw? He's not sure if you're insane for suggesting it or if he's insane for seriously considering it.

"If you're not comfortable with that we can just stop here. I'm not in a rush," you reassure him, pressing a soft kiss to his temple and it's then that Namjoon thinks he may lose his mind if he doesn't have you right now.

Without a word, he pulls you into another earth titling kiss, grinning against your mouth when you grip his fingers like a vice when he tugs on your hair and nips your lip. "You really don't know what you do to me," he breathes, easing his fingers out of you and chuckling darkly at the way you whimper from the loss. He might be pushing his luck here, but "Open."

He watches through lidded eyes as you eagerly suck on his fingers coated in your wetness. Your lashes fluttering behind your glasses and, your soaked slit grinding down on him in search of some sort of friction. "Such a good girl," he praises, kissing you while his hands fumble with his belt and the buttons of his pants. Relief coursing through him when manages to finally free himself. His cock slapping against his shirt covered stomach unceremoniously.

Your reaction to seeing him does fantastic things for his ego.

"You're...bigger than I anticipated," you breathe out, your eyes laser focused on his dick while your hands absentmindedly tug on his hair. "You thought about my dick? I'm flattered," he says with a smirk likely a touch too smug but, he can't help it. It's not every day the woman of your dreams casually mentions that she's fantasised about you and you have her spread out across your lap.

"I've thought about more than your dick but, it's featured in a fantasy or two," you laugh breathlessly, squirming in his lap.

"Well, I shouldn't keep you waiting any longer then,"

When you slowly start to sink down on him, Namjoon knows he's a goner. His hands grip your soft hips for dear life as your warm, wet walls gradually accommodate him inch by inch. He's not sure where he wants to look more. Your pretty pussy stretching around him or the blissed out look on your beautiful face right now.

His hand impatiently tugs your dress down and he takes a hard nipple in his mouth both to distract you from the discomfort and, for the simple want to. His head spins when your pussy clenches around him at the contact. Needy hands tugging on his hair while you moan from the sensations.

"Nam-Namjoon," you moan out so brokenly and, he's pretty sure he's never heard a more beautiful sound. He might be inlove with you actually but, he shoves that thought aside as soon as it arises.

He grits his teeth when you slowly rise up and sink back down on him again, your nails biting into him as you try your best to establish a steady rhythm. "You're so beautiful," he groans as he watches you bounce on his cock. He  didn't intend for that thought to slip out but, he doesn't regret in the slightest when he watches your eyelids flutter and your pussy tightens around him.

You can't even coherently respond to him. Too lost in your own pleasure and the feeling of his cock to string together a sentence at the moment. Not that Namjoon can really blame you. Your walls are like a vice around him, and he feels his release approaching dangerously quickly. There's no way he's going to cum without atleast getting you to cum for him one more time.

One of his hands tugs on your hair to pull you down for another heated kiss. All teeth and tongue and spit. While the other reaches between your thighs, the corners of his mouth ticking up when you gasp against him as his fingers draw quick circles on your clit. Thankfully, he's a fast learner.

He nearly bites down on your lip when you cum. Velvety walls clenching and spasming around him while you cling onto him for purchase. I mean, is it really a shock that it doesn't take much more than that for him to follow suit?

Groans and stuttered curses leaving his lips when pulses inside of you. The symphony of your sounds of pleasure and heavy breathing all that can be heard as he fills you. Holding you to him while he rides out his intense release. He doesn't think he's ever cum this hard in his entire life. Guess that's what happens when you cum inside the love of your life.

Pushing that insane thought aside once more, he loosens his hold on you when he regains feeling in his body. The sticky combination of your releases dribbling out of you and down his groin but, he can't bring himself to care at the moment.

"Usually, people go on dates first, no?" You ask still sounding breathlessly but, he can hear the smile in your tone.

"Mmm yeah, usually they do but, I don't think there's anything wrong with doing things a little out of order,"

"You're not wrong. I hope you know this is my roundabout way of asking you out,"

The laugh that forces itself out of him is hearty and more carefree than he's felt in a concerningly long time.

"I'd love to go out with you, y/n."

[dia-souls]

DIABOLIK LOVERS DAYLIGHT Analyzes [ Vol. 6 Sakamaki Laito ]

Original title: いつものゲーム

Source: Diabolik Lovers Daylight Vol. 6 Sakamaki Laito

Seiyuu: Hirakawa Daisuke

Analyze by: Admin Afra

Admin's note: Laito is the boy who, in my personal opinion, has endured the worst trauma among all his brothers, and the reason for his violent and deviant behavior now may be justified with the bitter memories of his past. But with Laito I can learn many lessons and I hope he will stick to these lessons. He should try to forget the relationship and bitterness of the past and believe in a brighter future. Maybe we can call him the poor broken man, but this man deserves a second chance and I'm sure he deserves Yui's pure love. What he could not receive from his mother.

Who are you, Laito? Are you sure that the only way to return to reality of yourself is to become carefree and not care about the things that really matter to you? Are you sure that this is the real you? Are you sure that your true self is not that kind and innocent child who forgot his entire childhood because of a tragic event and decided to create a new identity for himself. Your true self has been dead for years. Your true self died in your childhood.

This is the only answer I can give to Laito when he decides to kill Yui to end all his pain. But how did the story get here?

Playing hunter seems like a lot of fun for Laito, especially since Laito likes to see his prey try and his prey's stubbornness always amuses him.

This is why if a girl is submissive to Laito, Laito will never be attracted to that girl and finds her boring. In fact, it was Yui's special quality that made him the first person to see even a little bit of Laito's kind and pure love. Of course, this pure love of Laito can be interpreted in different ways, which has a different analysis of this CD.

As usual and like the previous CDs, Yui is suffering from a disease that weakened her heart. But Laito isn't like Reiji or Subaru, who notices Yui's poor health right away.

So when Yui can't continue the game the way Laito wants, Laito gets frustrated. In any case, Yui is someone who never gives up easily, and this is what made Laito attracted to Yui, that's why when he saw Yui not trying to escape from Laito in this game, at first he thought that Yui didn't take the game seriously.

In any case, when Laito wins, he also receives his prize. Even Yui's body shaking doesn't make Laito immediately notice her illness. Why? Because we are talking about Laito. A boy who can interpret the worst things in a way that is enjoyable for himself.

I personally believe that Laito is one of the smartest characters in this story. It's wrong to say that Laito doesn't notice Yui's bad situation. In fact, he noticed this the same day he was playing with Yui in the waterway, but the reason he doesn't pay attention to it is not because he didn't notice Yui's unusual illness.

He doesn't really want to pay attention to it. Laito considers himself a carefree and happy person and wants to maintain this fake persona that he has created for himself. Even thinking that Cordelia's return is painful for Laito, that's why he doesn't even want to think about it. And because he knows that perhaps Yui's illness is related to Cordelia, he tries to ignore it.

But Laito's behavior when he saw Yui using the medicine was really cruel. I mean Yui really needed that medicine. Come on, Laito, be at least kind enough to let her use that medicine to improve her health and restore her energy, but what you said to her was very cruel. Are you so selfish that you just don't want to suck the nasty blood soaked in medicine and ignore Yui's whole illness?

It's really funny that Laito says that if Cordelia is behind all of this, you should stop trying to fix things. It's really strange to hear this from a guy who loves tough girls, but I think it's a sign that Laito has been giving in to Cordelia for years. In fact, since he forgot his innocence and was infected by Cordelia.

Laito's character is very complex. The thoughts in his head are completely different from the sentences he utters in front of others. You can never judge him by his words because the thoughts in his head are completely different from the sentences he utters. Knowing Laito's thoughts on Yui, we can definitely tell that he is worried about Yui even if he pretends not to care.

It is not an exaggeration to say that Laito is afraid of Cordelia. Laito pointed out that if she was behind all this, he should surrender.

I don't know how to describe how Laito feels about Cordelia, but Cordelia definitely made Laito the person he is now. Because even Laito himself has forgotten his real identity and misinterpreted his feelings towards his mother. Laito never wanted to be infected. Maybe this is the reason why he doesn't like others to be pure and tries to pollute them. So easy that if I am not pure, others should not be pure either.

Does the fear of Cordelia's presence make Laito force Yui to stay at home and rest, or is it the fear of her becoming weaker? In my opinion, both. Laito keeps thinking about Yui's bad situation and we can't deny that he is worried about Yui, but he doesn't like to express this concern directly, so he uses Cordelia as an excuse. But even the presence of Cordelia scares Laito, so even this is not a lie.

The fact that Laito keeps thinking about Yui but tries to lie even to himself with different words shows that he is not being honest with himself. Or in other words, Laito is lost in this false identity he has created for himself and thinks that if he is really worried about the one he loves, he can no longer be his true self, while all these feelings are showing us the real Laito. Laito who tried to hide behind a false identity for years. This is something he himself admits.

(I shouldn't care about it. That's what someone like me should do.) Actually, the false persona that Laito uses to hide in this cruel world. This is Laito's way of defending himself against the oppression of the world. Hiding in a false identity that hurts everyone and cares for no one. Even if this Laito is not real.

Laito's excuses for forcing Yui to eat to regain her health are believable because that's what Laito always pretended to be. That he doesn't care about anything but his own pleasure.

I have a question here. Why was Laito angry at Yui's apology? I mean, Laito didn't show so much sensitivity about this before and didn't shout that you shouldn't apologize if you didn't do anything wrong. Because none of these events are your fault.

I interpret this way that Laito gets irritated by Yui's purity. Maybe this is the reason for Laito's compassion towards Yui. Laito has witnessed how much Yui has suffered and endured for having Cordelia's heart, and the fact that she apologizes even though she is a victim makes Laito angry because he knows that Yui does not deserve to be treated like this. And that she considers all the bad things to be her own fault.

Laito doesn't say it in words, but he wants Yui to care more about herself and know how valuable her existence is. Laito has been hurt by a cruel world before, just like Yui is now, but Laito hides in a new identity to save himself, something Yui can never do because Yui is a pure and simple girl. Yui's innocence makes Laito angry so much that he shouts, don't apologize. You are not the one who should apologize.

Laito's attempt to avoid Yui is futile. He thinks about Yui every moment and everywhere, and even he considers this incident as karma.

Laito shouts out loud why my heart hurts. It is not possible that I got Yui's disease. These feelings are heavy and painful. He doesn't want to accept it, but the reason is because of his love for Yui, and seeing her wither before his eyes hurts him more than anything.

Laito does not want to experience the pain again. That's why he shouts, I don't need these feelings. These feelings are not mine.

In fact, Laito has forgotten his true identity and thinks that these feelings have nothing to do with his new identity. But he never gets rid of them. Because Laito is still the same guy who stands behind a mask because he doesn't want to get hurt.

Laito does not want to accept these feelings lightly. Because he is Sakamaki Laito. Vampire who says lies and does not care about anyone. The mask with which Laito shows himself to the world. But behind this mask, the real Laito is hidden and does not want to come out. So he tries to get rid of these painful feelings in another way.

When Yui loses consciousness on a very dreamy date, Laito sees it as his best chance to end her pain right there. Of course, to end her pain? Or is this what he thinks?

"If we settle everything here, both your pain and mine will be relieved. You are tired of this pain. me too. So wouldn't it be great to get rid of it right here?"

Laito doesn't expect Yui to agree with him. That's why when Yui smiles at him, Laito shouts that he didn't smile. Cry and beg for life.

Again, it's Laito fighting his own emotions. Seeing Yui's innocent and pure face who accepts death and smiles at him in the last moments of her life torments him more. The thought of how Yui can be so pure even when she is contaminated by his hands. How can Yui look at him with love like this when she is going to be killed by his hands.

but no Laito's hands do not move. Because that's not what he wants. These feelings tormented him even more than Yui's pain. He wanted to end his own pain, so he decided to end his own life instead of Yui.

These feelings torment Laito more than anything to see the dearest person in his life die in front of his eyes, or even worse, decide to kill her with a false mask, with the lie that the pain of both of them will be relieved.

This is why Laito considers himself a loser. A loser who didn't even try to save his lover and selfishly decided to relieve his own pain. Not the pain of his lover.

It is hard for him to imagine a world without Yui. The pain is much more terrible than the pain Yui used to endure. Laito sees this world with pain and suffering. That's why he wanted to relieve his pain quickly, not to see Yui's withering and death. Maybe it's a strange way to express love. But Laito needed to lose his true identity once to understand what his true feelings are and how much Yui is dear to him. His loss behind a false mask led him to find Yui and Yui saved him from the false world that Laito made for himself and showed him that even in a cruel world there is light and hope.

Yui is dear to Laito. Dearer than anyone else. Yui made Laito rediscover his true self. And understand that there is nothing wrong with having feelings and hiding them is more painful than anything else.

Laito knows that he can't live without Yui and that was the feeling that bothered him, but hiding behind a false mask was never the way to ease Laito's pain.

It was hard for him to express his feelings because he was afraid of people and the cruel world, but now with Yui's help, he has learned to overcome this fear and come out from behind the false mask. This is the only thing that relieves his pain. Being by Yui's side and expressing his true feelings.

[applestorms]

the winners & losers of death note

after repeatedly trying and failing to write this death note essay i'm just gonna go for it:

the fundamental flaw of L, whether you see this as a flaw/discrepancy in his character or the writing surrounding him itself, is the fact that by the time of his death, he has no clear win state. let me explain... by first talking extensively about light aljdsflksd.

MAJOR spoiler warning after this point. 3-ish (very long) sections.

1. light's goals: kira & utopian ideals (ft. fem!light)

i discussed this a bit in my tags on this post talking about how light's core character traits would translate over to a female version of himself, but to elaborate/summarize my thoughts further: i believe that light's fundamental flaw/weakness comes down to his desire to be Seen, to be recognized & validated by the people around him. i often see/hear people describing light's ultimate flaw as "ego," and while that's definitely a part of it, i think this is perhaps a more nuanced/neutral way of understanding it.

as has been pointed out before, light's goal of becoming the "god of the new world," isn't really an idea he immediately comes up with but rather is more of a retroactive justification that he clings to for the rest of the series after the initial rush of guilt he feels for murdering two people without thinking. this is perhaps even more obvious in the manga, as while episode 1 of the anime ends with light's claim to godhood, in the manga it takes him a lot longer to build up to that conclusion and really develop the full extent of his hubris. (EDIT: he totally says this in ch1 of the manga too, i just forgot. the point about it being retroactive justification still stands, though.) even so, i think post-death note light takes to this justification so easily for a reason: again, his desire to be seen.

before the death note, light takes a very understandable if somewhat flawed/juvenile approach to this sating this desire, specifically in how he aims to excel in every single system he is presented with, whether that be academics, sports/physicality (not just tennis, but physical attractiveness/neatness/cleanliness), and social interactions. it's that last category that i think is the most notable here, as light wants to succeed socially on multiple levels: on a personal scale, he aims to be pleasing and charming and polite to everyone he speaks to, for the sake of manipulating them, sure, but also so that he can extend that victory past personal relationships and into something Greater, into the Image of Light Yagami as the studious, respectable son. it isn't just enough for him to do well, he needs the reputation to go along with it, and the recognition and respect that comes with it.

this is part of the reason why the lind l. tailor moment is such a beautiful part of the writing of death note, as it is a moment where L simultaneously fucks light over massively, pinpointing his location and sending a squad his way in an instant, but also a moment where L gives light exactly what he wants: recognition. L doesn't just establish himself as a rival to take seriously w/ this move, he also reveals kira's existence to the world, that the deaths are the actions of a single person consciously and carefully acting and not just some divine power. he see's light's humanity, the potential cracks in his ego and temper, the overwhelming humanity of his ideals, efficiently using such traits to get kira to reveal himself in the first place.

i tend to take a lot of light's explanations of his actions to ryuk with a grain of salt as i think he is a lot less skilled at planning than he lets on, with his real skill being his in-the-moment acting & reactions, but i'm inclined to believe him when he tells ryuk in ch1 that

as a justification for not writing more specific deaths and therefore hiding his existence for longer. keep in mind, kira is established on the internet long before L enters the picture & the lind l. tailor incident-- light is utilizing the death note to push himself into the spotlight of the entire globe, not just the limited social sphere he grew up with.

(sidenote1: i think you can also definitely read into this on a more internal level of why light would want to be recognized so badly in the first place, considering how busy soichiro yagami most likely is and what their relationship looks like throughout the series. i don't think there's any evidence that he's actively neglectful necessarily, if anything light is described as being pretty spoiled & soichiro cares about him when he's around, but it still feels notable to me how empty his life is pre-death note. you can just Feel the silence as he goes through the motions in the first episode, barely talking to anyone as he ghosts his way through life. he might be succeeding in everything system he approaches technically, but that sure as hell doesn't make him happy. whether or not the death note makes him happy is a whole nother question...)

ANYWAYS. this is all to say that light's ideals give him a pretty clear win state, both in terms of what he actually, physically wants in terms of world domination/godhood, but also emotionally when it comes to what truly satisfies him. on a meta level, kira gives light really good motivation-- for the sake of his ideals, for the sake of trying to create his vision of a utopian society, for the sake of being Seen, he needs to keep writing names and out-thinking anyone who tries to stop him. on an internal level, it just starts getting complicated when the one who Sees him best is the one who fully dedicated to stopping him.

speaking of which.

2. L's goals: no real win state?

the lind l. tailor moment is such a fantastic instance in the story because it really works both ways in setting up the rivalry/mutual satisfaction that L and light grant each other. i've already described what light gets out of it, and simultaneous terror and delight that he gets out of it, but this is mostly an L post so let's talk about his side of things.

to my understanding, if what light fundamentally wants is to be Seen, what L fundamentally wants is to Win. ok, yeah, the way he says it is that he "hates losing," but same difference.

the problem with this desire is that in order for L to win or lose, he needs circumstances under which those options are the two main choices in the first place-- he needs a game, someone to test himself against, a challenge(r). when lind l. tailor dies and L proves kira's meager human existence to the world he practically sounds like he's cumming his pants, so i think we can assume kira stands as a particularly alluring challenge for him.

this also explains why L gets so depressed and frustrated with light over the course of the yotsuba arc. not only is light somehow out-foxing him by creating a circumstance under which he can claim not to be kira and actually be correct insofar as his memories are concerned, light has also set the game so that he's stepped off the board entirely, trusting his planning and his own non-death note influenced psyche and denouncing his role as a player entirely. in a way you could read this as light utilizing the one strength he has over L to his advantage: not just his awareness of the supernatural, as people often say, but the fact that kira has goals outside of winning, which can't really be said for L (or at least not without some additional extrapolation/interpretations of his inner psyche).

this is why my main claim here is that L doesn't really have a clear win state. for kira, winning consists of a few clear, distinct things: a utopian world, free from crime, under the reign of kira, where light has the control & worship of a god. for L, winning is a lot less distinct: really just. not letting light do all that. as this other post points out, it really isn't that far off to assume that L's motivations might've shifted from his initial state goal of executing kira, particularly as he gets more attached to light on an individual level, even if it's more as a rival than a true friendship. L is a liar and a troll, yes, but he still has "flashes of sentiment," and it makes a lot of sense to me that so many people see L winning as him stealing light away for himself to be locked away for the rest of their lives.

(sidenote2: i believe it was one of the jdramas (?) that actually does portray L winning but specifically at the cost of his own life, which again fits considering everything i just went through. i don't think L is actively suicidal at the idea of no longer having kira as a rival (well. <3< rival, the children yearn for kismesissitude), but. well, see the final section of this essay where i talk more about boredom for more on that.)

ultimately, light and L kind of suffer for the same reason: living for the rivalry, but also because of that never being truly satisfied no matter which way they come out in the end. the tragic yaoi of it all. i guess one of the conclusions here is that you should read this fic time speaks by aSmallMoon333 for a fascinating evolution of the rivalry past the supposed ending point of canon. anywho.

3. L's death: a failure of writing, or character?

hot take (??? genuinely can't tell if this is hot anymore so ig mean this like, partially sarcastically) but L's death is kind of really fucking unsatisfying, especially if you're witnessing it for the first ever time. i remember distinctly reading the manga back in high school and being really caught off guard by it, despite already having been spoiled about it, and while i pinpointed the cause initially being the fact that light doesn't even bother to write down the damn name himself, i think there's a lot more to this than that.

i've been writing about this idea of L not having a clear win state primarily under the approach of character analysis, looking at L's motivations and emotional desires to see how they inform what him winning would look like, but you could very well read this as being a flaw in the writing surrounding him as well.

L's not really a moral character, primarily because that's one of the main ways he's a foil to light-- where light is painfully, excruciatingly human, naive in his ideals, dedicated to them at all costs, L is a lot more apathetic, perhaps not to the same degree as near sometimes comes across (though he has more to him too, even if the anime doesn't really give enough time for that), but still enough to be generally considered a pretty amoral character. L definitely comes across to me as the type of person that understands the world deeply on an intellectual level, but struggles to meaningfully emotionally connect with it. the way he interacts with people is the clearest example of this, again making him a foil to light in that he gives no shits about how people view him and prefers staying hidden as much as possible, creating detailed psychological profiles of the criminals he follows but still misreading details in-the-moment while speaking to people (the autism. the autism), but i think this could very well extend to how he views morals as well, deciding that kira is evil on a logical level because people dying=bad but not really emotionally connecting with that. like,

yeah yeah they're both JUSTICE!! or whatever, but is this really true? not to get into an in-depth discussion on the nature of ethics & morality in my tumblr essay (though i actually wouldn't mind doing that...), but as the series and especially the yotsuba arc goes on, it becomes more and more clear that L's lack of attachment to people extends to his lack of attachment to traditional ethics. time and time again, L does shady shit for the sake of finding kira, whether that be covering the yagami household in a truly absurd number of cameras, recruiting actual criminals to help with the investigation, or chaining some kid to him 24/7 for weeks on end. this is a large part of the reason behind why i question what winning would actually look like for L-- would he be willing to turn kira in, should he get sufficient evidence to put light through the actual justice system? even if he is willing to give that rivalry up, i have a hard time believing he wouldn't want to confirm the death by doing it himself or something. but if that's the case, then why bother waiting? clearly, he's pretty fucking sure that light is kira, and he basically does figure everything out by the end of the yotsuba arc. so, why? is he waiting to prove it to the task force? is he still waiting for light to incriminate himself? but that seems like an awfully stupid thing to still be waiting for. what does L actually want here?

^^^ this last entire paragraph was basically my motivation for writing this, btw. ultimately, i still don't know if i have a conclusion that i'm really satisfied with, here. perhaps it really is just that light isn't the one to pull the trigger in the end, the nerve of a move that bitchy that kinda instinctively icks me out. or maybe ohba just wrote it bad!! idk. final thoughts-wise.........

one satisfying thing: in a way, light wins because he wins over people (namely, the rest of the task force), which tracks. the only reason why he keeps winning post-L death is because of this win, actually, which keeps him going for years despite the fact that he's doing objectively a dogshit job as L, as near so sweetly points out.

one unsatisfying thing: you could read L as losing because ohba doesn't actually have all that extensive of a view of what a good view of justice would look like, particularly in opposition to kira's view. in a way, L kind of just ends up representing a return to the status quo, where the criminals that kira is so desperate to purge are simply dealt with in the usual way & their crimes are a fact of life. perhaps this is asking too much, the rivalry alone is fun enough to watch without having to get too in-depth asking question about ideal global justice systems and the nature of crime & criminals. i genuinely do think a part of my frustration here is just that light was too much of a bitch to kill his main rival by his own hand, despite holding himself to a more respectable Standard in desperate moments prior (e.g. not taking the eyes deal w/ naomi misora). but it's at least an adjacent question, and maybe establishing more clearly what L's true win would've looked like could have made light's eventual victory just a bit more satisfying, instead of feeling like it comes out of nowhere after his extensive planning miraculously works perfectly according to keikaku. it's almost the marvel problem as is... but i digress.

bonus: boredom

in my recent reread/rewatch of the series, i keep getting struck by how much i really like the beginning of death note, like the beginning beginning of the series and when each main character is initially introduced, especially light and ryuk.

i don't think it's too much of a stretch to equate "boredom" with "depression" in this context. long before L is introduced to the series ryuk is the one being presented as light's equal and opposite-- parallels from opposite worlds, mutually disgusted by their own kind and the miserable state the world around them has devolved to. for L this sentiment is a bit less overt, mostly because again, apathy, but the fact that he spends the majority of his time hyperfixated on the worst parts of humanity speaks of something. perhaps i'll have more feelings about this upon rereading the ending, as that's a bit (a lot) fuzzy in my mind, but it's one of the main points i emotionally resonated with the strongest, a point of connection i keep coming back to.

light really is just a kid, at the core of everything. a teenager that did everything he was supposed to and still couldn't make himself happy with it. that's the real tragedy of death note to me, that for all he did to create a better, more ideal world, he never felt all that happy with any of it. not that he would admit that. but what is light yagami's greatest skill if not his denial...

[spiralsublime]

i would 100% love to read your thoughts on Kingskin x reader headcannons

Thank you for asking as my brain has been cooking over this for AGES.

OKAY.

About the Reader:

Kingskin is canonically bisexual. And also this dude is fucking massive, so I don't think that he is attracted by physicality?? I think he is attracted to VIBES.

In my heart he likes someone with some backbone. People just bend to him easily so a bit of push back is v hot to him.

Definitely part of the underground, he has canon connections to people who have worked in his club and has not, so the reader just has to have a connection to the underground, not necessarily his part of it.

I do think he doesn't get out much so likely, they met in his club. Home turf advantage.

Kingskin in a Relationship.

In my heart he is a gift giver. Kingskin is the King of his club so it makes a ton of sense that he uses that to make his current partner feel like royalty.

He is overtly confident in himself, his desires, and his ability. I think he likes to show off his current lover, lots of physical contact though it is usually only like one handed. (Think about leading with a hand on the back, holding a shoulder)

I think he has had few long relationships, often having a flavor of the week. When he breaks that usual goal, it is big news around his crew and the scene as a whole. (Both characters we met as his exs were longer picks imo)

I would not say that Kingskin is overtly flirtly, rather he is exceptionally blunt. He also has used the concept that most people see him as incapable of tenderness to really pull at his lover. A gentle hand on the cheek, running a hand along your back, ect.

His partner is the only one allowed to call him King. Very few have ever learned his real name and he doesn't react to most nicknames. (This is why we got the "use my full name")

Most of his long term partners have ended because they made him realize that he was no longer strictly "casual" with him. It makes him panic cut off.

He will not accept anyone saying anything poor about his lover, he has killed in front of a lover because of that very situation.

If They Made It Official

This is a no man's land to Kingskin. He has not had a long term open relationship since he took over his spot of the underground.

He becomes hyper protective and possessive, lots of separation anxiety because he knows he has many enemies (and you do too probably).

He just melts into gentle touches from his lover. He rarely allows physical contact to come to him rather than him give it. But he finally works up to feeling safe enough to do so.

Makes them a themed drink lol.

Gift giving gets even worse.

Hearing his actual name from his lover's mouth is an Experience and it melts him immediately.

Big teddy bear energy when he actually allows himself to risk loving again.

This is at least the starter set for him lol. I have so many COOKING. Jennifer Drips?? Vic Ethanol?? I'm cooking. Let me know if you have any specifics you want to see, or more thoughts about this MAN.

[brotherwtf]

https://www.tumblr.com/brotherwtf/764161646393442304/for-the-angsty-ideas-what-about-clegan-mutual?source=share

I also wanna add reincarnation to this in modern setting this time.

Jhon always had dreams of a figure who is beautiful with blonde hair and blue eyes, slender figure but he couldn't really see the face or hear the voice and is walking away from him and Jhon tries really hard to say something but it feels like his vocal cords have gotten mute and he starts struggling and wakes up! He's been having this dream ever since he was born. So he was always looking for this angel, and he assumes it's a girl and has always dated girls with blonde hair and blue eyes. But none of them were what he was looking for. He's not "homophobic or anything" because Curt, his best friend is gay. But he has never felt anything for a guy and has strongly believed his life partner is his angel, because only a girl can be that beautiful right?

Gale has also had similar dream but he knows the figure is a man because he was tall big and in his uninform. So Gale has always known he's gay. Marge is his best friend and they do everything together so much so that they enroll in the same college.

Jhon is a senior in the same college who's just watching all the first years coming in. He sees a blonde figure from afar and he has a very strange feeling he knows her and that she's probably the one he's been looking for and he approachs her trying to charm her but she's not having any of it and says "Sorry I have a boyfriend" and pulls a guy from the crowd "This is Gale, my boyfriend" and Jhon is speechless because he's certain his heart just stopped for a moment. But he manages to say "What kinda name is Gale? You remind me of my old friend Buck, so I'm gonna start calling you Buck" he doesn't even know where that came from but he's certain he has done this before and Gale and Marge look at eachother in confusion. Jhon introduces himself as Jhon "But everyone calls me Bucky". Marge immediately clocks in "So you're giving him your own name" in a teasing tone. Anyways that would be their first meeting. Jhon is now somehow convincing himself that his "angel" is Marge because she checks all the boxes but mostly because of his internalised homophobia. He tries to approach her again but honestly he doesn't even realise that he's looking for Gale instead. Whom he quickly learns is gay and Marge is just his best friend.

Long story short Jhon tries really hard to convince himself that he's not attracted to Gale, but he's just very pretty for a guy and tries to reason with Curt who calls him out on his bullshit. He and Gale become friends very easily obviously and Gale is falling in love but he knows that Jhon doesn't feel that way because he's the straightest mf ever and he has seen many times he has tried to hit on Marge (he just didn't know it was always more of an excuse to see Gale instead). So he decides to move on before he ends up in deep shit which might break his heart even more. Something something Jhon finally gets over his stupid Angel because he can't deny to himself anymore that he's in love with Gale. That night in his dreams he sees the angel, same with blonde hair and blue eyes but it has a face now. Shorter hair than he had imagined and a deep voice asking him "What took you long?" Jhon wakes up and he's feeling every emotion. He's happy that he has finally found his angel but is also very angry at himself that he couldn't see what was infront of him all this time. He finally decides to tell Gale his feelings but he sees Gale being really close with another guy and way too friendly for his liking..... Is he too late??? 🧐

damn shawty I love everything about this.... definitely thinking thoughts

reincarnation aus are SO FUCKING GOOD and I think we need to definitely definitely talk more about John and Gale finding each other in every single life because they DO!! THEY WILL FIND EACH OTHER IN EVERY LIFE

but I'm obsessed with this idea that John knows this soulmate of his will be blond hair and blue eyes, pretty lips and the most perfect waist, and so when he sees Gale and Marge together he's like "oh damn, she's perfect!" because Marge is a certified baddie and who doesn't want to be with her

Gale being smitten right away is such a Gale thing to do, who wouldn't fall in love with John's easy going personality and flirty nature? it's easy to see why Marge is also so smitten with John, and he can't help but feel jealous when John is immediately so taken with her as well, decides he's going to be a good friend and wingman to Marge and will help her be happy even if it means losing John to her

ughhh but him seeing Gale in his dreams, seeing glimpses of military dress and planes in the sky and being so so confused by it all, sees a blonde man smiling and laughing but can't quite place who it is, he looks awfully familiar and he can almost hear the sound of his laugh when he's with Marge and Gale, thinks he might recognize those piercing blue eyes when he's with them as well

and then one night he sees him, Gale, his best friend, Marges best friend, haloed in light and looking so damn charming in a flight suit and crushed cap, extending a gloved hand and asking what took him so long, and John wakes with a gasp, almost shouts in euphoria because he's found him, he's found his soulmate, and he's been right in front of him this whole time

but as you said anon, Gale's talking to another guy, another smooth talker like Gale, and he's hiding his laughs behind his hand like he did with John and flushing so prettily when he helps him with his homework and John's so so worried that he's too late, he's so worried that he's watching his soulmate slip through his fingers

I wanna make this classic romcom shit so imagine John running up to Gale one night, it's cold and raining but John just can't let Gale go, refuses to let his soulmate slip through his fingers again, and he confesses his love for him, says that even if Gale doesn't love him back John will still love him for a thousand lifetimes and more, he just had to tell him before it was too late

and Gale, of course, just stands there shocked at first, but surges forward instantly and captures John's lips in a kiss, clutching both sides of his head and kissing him like a desperate man, kisses him like he's starving, and oh, John could get used to this

this is such a fun concept, thank you anon!! this is making me want to write more reincarnation or soulmate stuff this is so fun

[eldritch-spouse]

How would the Clergy guys react to someone abandoning their pet at the clergy? Like their pet is well behaved and a sweetheart but they have gotten bored and have decided to leave them at the clergy so they don’t have to deal with them their self?

🍄anon

[Could have abandoned the pet on any regular street, which is already awful enough, but why not go the extra mile and release it in a place notorious for senseless violence and bad people? *Wheezing*]

Morell doesn't have time for this. Get it out of his kitchen, asap. Even if he used to deal with animals plenty when he was younger, his schedule is far too busy now, he can't keep it back home and he sure as Hell can't keep it in the kitchen at The Clergy. This will be promptly thrust onto someone else or he'll personally place the abandoned outside the perimeter of the building.

Listen, if it's not equine, Patches likely doesn't care all that much. He definitely doesn't want it in his lab. Likewise, he's often too much of a hot mess to keep an animal that isn't something both him and Stitches are fixated on, so this is also being dumped on someone else.

Gallon is somewhat averse to germs, and that applies here. He doesn't know where this animal has been and he shares no fondness for it, so it's more likely the slime will attempt to contain it. At the same time that he's not very keen on interacting with it, he also won't allow others to hurt it. This will soon become Admin's problem.

Not going to lie, Grimbly sees that thing and immediately ponders if it could be a potential snack. Then reminds himself it likely won't taste that good. The animal is quickly caught regardless because of hunting instincts he can't quell, but ultimately, he's also putting this on someone else.

Santi truly holds no malice for animals, but they just don't like him... He tries to shoo the little thing outside as smoothly as possible, and if he fails, he tries to get Grimbly to catch it so they can, once again, take this to more capable hands. It sometimes saddens him that cute animals will avoid him.

Would you trust any living being with Vinnel? No, of course not. He probably doesn't get to be anywhere near the animal before someone else rips it away from him. Fortunately, Vinnel's overwhelming hatred and desire to maim extends only to people, so it's not as if the animal would be in terrible hands. If he manages to grab it, he'll bring it on stage depending on how docile it is.

Belo is an angel. In spite of being a warrior, he still attracts and calms animals with ease. Once spotted, Belo will attempt to approach the animal and get it within his grasp. He will then request to see Admin as soon as he can so the power can ask to fly this animal to a different location. A shelter, if he's informed of where those generally are.

Nebul is the most apt monster to deal with this, and more often than not, the person the others bring found animals to. He can usually get a grip on the situation easily and has little trouble babysitting until something can be done about the situation. Besides, Purpur loves new friends! Maybe, if things line up, Nebul will adopt it.

Fank-e, Gods help him, is just painful to animals. He's huge, very loud, very flashy and fast. No animal likes that. He'll spend his time chasing after it only to either fail at catching it, inflict ridiculous amounts of collateral damage on his surroundings, or give the poor thing a heart attack when he catches it. He would try to keep it, but the chances of that poor pet living in constant misery are high, so other staff members remove it.

Listen. If it's small and wandering around all lost, it's a snack. Said pet would last very little around Sybastian, and that's that on that.

You know Krulu would probably would make the ground swallow that thing. You'll never see it again, who knows what happened to it.

[beevean]

I remembered a post I stumbled upon a while ago. It was a gifset of that moment in NFCV where Carmilla strokes Hector's hair and says "You are mine now, Forgemaster. You have nothing else but me."

But what really made my neurons go into overdrive was the way the person tagged the post.

"I am not yours. I am not anyone's. - Hector & Carmilla"

Would you believe that this one singular line made my brain fire up like fireworks? This is a brilliant way to convey the parallels between the two characters! Well. The potential parallels, since Carmilla is hardly relevant after S2 :^)

It made me think of how the story would have gone if they kept Carmilla as Hector's antagonist and Lenore and the other two were never introduced. (when you think about it, Lenore's main purpose in S3 was effectively hijacking Carmilla's place: while I prefer her concept, narratively speaking she shouldn't exist. I'm not even being mean when I say it. In a hypothetical rewrite, I'd fuse the two characters)

I found some Hectilla fics, mostly written pre-S3 when fans still believed she'd have a bigger role. Needless to say, they're mostly BDSM porn built on a generic dommy mommy/subby puppy dynamic: while Hector's attraction to Carmilla can be explained with anything from "she's hot and charming" to "she's the only one who makes sense in the court and the only one who cares about my work", no such depth is given to Carmilla. She likes Hector because... he's pathetic and breedable.

So, I propose another angle.

If the ideal Lenector that only exists in my head is built on lies, treachery, and shared misery with a hint of growing mutual empathy that nevertheless never allows them to overcome their resentment... the ideal Hectilla is built on fear. They are both afraid of each other, but need each other for their needs. They are also both afraid of the world, it's just that they react to that fear in different ways: Carmilla by attacking first, Hector by hiding and fawning.

And making Carmilla a creature of fear would make her so, so much more interesting, and allow her to be a real visceral victim of trauma and not just a flat radfem stereotype. A lot of what I say here is inspired by this brilliant post by @chumpovodir!

Carmilla sees every man as a potential threat. An old man turned her and kept her as a pet, showed her that "vampiric love" that she has internalized but despises when it comes from men, and other men attacked her kingdom to destroy everything she built, and other men wanted her to die because, well, the nerve of that woman, thinking she could be in charge. She finds Dracula disgusting for being, in her eyes, like that old man who ruined her life, an insane destructive leech good for nothing. She loathes power-hungry men, violent men, men who think they're in charge and can toy her as they please.

Hector is the opposite of that. He doesn't crave any power: he wants to be left in peace. He craves, as it becomes immediately clear to her, acceptance. He's easily swayed with a few nice words, and even when Dracula dies, he holds no malice in his heart.

He's young. He's cute. He's a useful idiot.

The broken little girl in her still sees him a threat, because one day, he might grow up and become a real man, with their fangs and claws and thirst for power.

But - and this is the important part - the threat is now curbable. Hector placed himself in her hands, and she has the power to do with him as she pleases.

Carmilla has put herself in the position of that old man enslaving a cute girl for his sick desires. However, she thinks she's justified. It's not cruelty: it's preemptive self-defense. She can make this dirty almost-man into a docile puppy who will never hurt her, and work for her, and give her pleasure, never pain.

He can be a prized possession, because he is smart and knowledgeable and has blasphemous powers and shares the same goal of turning humans into livestock. This man deserves to live, for now. As long as he never thinks of harming her. As long as he remains a puppy forever. As long as he's hers, because only she deserves to have stuff and other people.

Carmilla takes pride in not belonging to anyone, let alone a man, but she doesn't see the irony in forcing Hector to the same fate that traumatized her. She doesn't see herself in him, because she did nothing to deserve pain, but he does, for the sin of being born the same gender as all the people who hurt her.

Perhaps she refuses to see herself in him, because the thought disgusts her too much.

But what about Hector?

Well, at first he'd cling onto Carmilla, because what else is he supposed to do? Sure, she tricked him and beat him to a pulp to assert dominance, but she still needs him, and her plans still make sense to him, and part of him still wants to hope that when she praised his skills, she meant it, even if in a selfish way. For a while, she becomes his world - a cruel world, but a stable one.

But then... it will become his turn to claim that he's not hers, he's not anyone's.

Perhaps he'll use his parents as reference. He used to be afraid of them, and resentful for making him believe he should have never been born, and eventually he killed them in retailation. Carmilla, too, terrifies him, but because she swings from saccharine praise to violent rage. So there's hope to get the former, if he plays nice. And if he gets the latters, that means he deserved it, right? And besides, she finds him useful, right? Isn't that, too, appreciation? That is why, at first, he accepts his position.

When she put that collar on him, wasn't that her way of showing love? He understands that. He is still, at his core, that abused kid who looks up to authority figures who see him as dirt.

But she also hates him for something he had no control over, just like his parents. She fears him for no rational reason, and that fear clouds all judgment. She could turn on him at any moment. She's no better than Dracula in this regard. Carmilla is far less rational than she pretends to be, and eventually, as he's forced to be with her, he'll see that behind the mask of a confident predator, hides the heart of a frightful bird with a broken wing.

He'd see himself in her, and he wouldn't like it. He doesn't want to be feared at all, let alone for something he can't do anything about, and he doesn't want to belong to such a volatile person. That could set him to the thought path that'll lead him to desire freedom: most importantly, freedom from his traumatic past.

Perhaps, at some point, Hector would even hate Carmilla for what she does to him, fantasize about killing her and all. Then he'll realize that hatred, too, poisoned Carmilla to the point that she almost became pitiable. And hatred also poisoned Dracula to the point of making him irrational. He must avoid falling into the same trap.

Ideally, if Carmilla is doomed to become prey of her fear and hatred, Hector should find the strength to break free of his own, and learn to face the world.

i hate doing the showrunners' work for free :(

[mobumi]

Can I ask something from JJK? What do you think are Itadori and Fushiguro’s greatest personality strengths and weaknesses? Why? What do you love about their dynamic? Sorry if you've answered these questions before.....

Yes, of course! This is really fun to do, thanks for the ask :) I haven't read the manga so this is totally based off the anime! This is going to be long, so bear with me haha

Itadori Yuji

Yuji has a great sense of morality and has well defined values. He will fight for what he believes is right and will treat someone like they would treat him which I think is why he can make friends really easily. He is quite popular in high school, everyone knows him and knows he's strong. Yuji is not really flashy, but people remember him, and acknowledge him.

More than that, even if he's popular he doesn't conform to anything, he can interact with different types of groups, not being scared of his social status and only following his instincts. His open-minded nature makes people warm up to him right away. We can see that with his friendships with Megumi and Nobara. Megumi immediately has a soft spot for Yuji, his shining personality and his sense of justice strike him. He knows that Yuji is a good person and he is so convinced of it that he asked Gojo to spare him. Nobara seems to find Yuji annoying at first, but they quickly get along and she mourns him when she learns about his "death" even if she didn't know him for a long time. He has also an instant connection with Junpei and Todo.

So, for me Yuji makes people trust him and care about him naturally, even Gojo is more invested than he should be. We have a protagonist who is really charming, attracting people around him and that is one of his biggest strengths as a main character. He is just very likable and he cares a lot for the people close to him. He has so much love to give to others and will protect people who can't protect themselves without hesitation, and that keeps him strong and focused when time is needed.

As for his weaknesses, Yuji has a lot of empathy and doesn't act selfishly enough. Having empathy is not a weakness in itself but the way Yuji is using it sometimes affects him a lot. He follows blindly what his grandpa told him before dying but forgetting himself in the process, he always wants to be reliable, save people, but that makes him in danger and devalue his own life. That is until he breaks and is scared to die, but even then, the people around him come before him. He protects people, but he never protects himself and gets easily swallowed by his own emotions which makes him more vulnerable. I think that is why his enemies can manipulate him emotionally to actually hurt him (for example Mahito).

Fushiguro Megumi

Like Yuji, Megumi has very strong moral principles and even if they differ in certain ways because he has his own sense of justice, his drive to also protect people makes him reliable. He really cares about all the people close to him, though, he doesn't show it a lot, his actions speak for themselves. But he's also willing to follow what he believes in, even if that means breaking the rules, for example, when he asked Gojo to save Yuji from his execution. For him, protecting good people like Tsumiki is what encouraged him to become a jujutsu sorcerer. So he doesn't strictly follow authority just like Gojo, if that means to save someone who he thinks deserved to be saved.

Although, his strengths reside more in his intelligence and maturity. Megumi thinks before he acts, he analyses the situation and comes up with a plan or understands people's actions pretty quickly. And he knows how to use his abilities and never wastes an opportunity to solve a problem, even if that means risk his life in the process. I'll expand more on that in his weaknesses. So, I think Megumi is not acting impulsively most of the time, he takes a step back and chooses the best option to defeat an enemy. Since he was a child, he has shown maturity for his age and it has helped him become really independant. Despite being calculating and mature, Megumi can recognize when he is in the wrong or selfish. He accepts that he can make emotional decisions and he tells Yuji that he's not a hero, just a jujutsu sorcerer. He's also aware of his weaknesses and tries to correct them and get stronger physically and, i think, emotionally.

While his strength resides in his growth, intelligence and his ability to better himself, Megumi finds his weaknesses in his lack of self-care. This is really similar to Yuji as well, he is ready to pay the price because he's a jujutsu sorcerer and he thinks sacrifice is part of his commitment. He risks his life while using his domain expansion to help Nanami and Maki and he completely gives up on his life just to complete his mission, without having any regard for his life or how would people close to him feel. He apoligizes to Yuji, but he truly thinks he's doing what's best but in reality he's just gambling on his life and flee the situation and the responsability of the damages his power could cause.

Megumi's abilities are incredible, but he restrains himself too much and didn't realize it until Gojo mentioned it. He was too insecure about Yujii's growth and didn't focus enough on his own.

Yuji & Megumi

I think one of the main things they have in common is their resilience, they both follow their morals and values. It helps them carry on and give them courage.

Yuji is completely broken when he became exactly what he hates, he went against his values and it made him question himself and his legitimacy to exist. For him, his actions shouldn't be for nothing or meaningless so in the end it was all worth it. Whereas Megumi would think that if a sacrifice is needed, he would do it, if he's sure about his actions after analysing everything, he would mostly not think he was in the wrong. When they work together, they can see the bigger picture, they are more lucid and they counterbalance each other's weaknesses.

What's really interesting about their dynamic is that at first glance they seem to be the archetype of the sun and the moon or opposites attract, and I like this trope honestly, but if you look closer, they're actually more alike than we think. That's why they understand each other and can rely on each other.

We can see that well when they fight together in the Shibuya incident, they moved together in harmony. They gravitate around each other, they know each other's strengths, they use it at their advantage. Yuji immediately gets used to Megumi's shadow technique and Megumi takes Yuji's raw power into account. More than that, Megumi reads him well and noticed when something happened to Yuji, he cares a lot and repeats that he doesn't want him to die several times. Yuji trusts Megumi immensely and admires him, he pays attention to details and remembers what Megumi likes. Their closeness is also shown when Yuji taught him how to make meatballs or when they are comfortable in each other's spaces. They always protect each other, hate to see one of them suffer to the point of lying for the sake of one another.

I just think they compliment each other and work very well together, their interactions are funny, wholesome, endearing, intense, everything I like in a friendship or romantic relationship! There is care and love between them, even without shipping goggles, they are connected and paralleled. They're soulmates.

I tried my best to organize my thoughts sorry if it's messy or incoherent 😅 Feel free to add your inputs if I missed out anything! 😊

[teufelsabbiss]

Story idea: Tianlang-Jun/Yuè Qīngyuán, saving the world with papapa

Yuè Qīngyuán dies in Luò Bīnghé's trap and cycles back to his disciple days. He remembers everything.

Unfortunately, this doesn't help him to change the things he wants to the most, since he's already bound to Xuan Su, Qiu manor is burned down and Shen Jiu is missing. Searching for him doesn't yield positive results, Wu Yanzi is good at hiding his tracks.

During a meeting with other sects, Yuè Qīngyuán meets Su Xiyan and nearly has a heart attack, because she looks almost exactly like Luo Binghe. Or rather, his future damn half-demon murderer looks like her. He is aware that killing her right then and there will be discovered immediately and will spell death for himself. He almost attempts it, though. The only thing that makes him hold back is that he's not a hundred-percent sure that she really was/will be Luò Bīnghé's mother.

Then he is saved from Wu Yanzi's murder attempt by Shen Jiu again. He still thinks he deserves Shen Jiu's ire for failing him, but this time he attempts to give him a more in depth explanation – and is shocked to be forgiven and scolded for hurting himself. He never thought that was an option! Now he knows he can change things and hopefully prevent the horrible fate that awaits them.

Many events happen as he remembers them regardless. But he tries to amend them differently, with mixed success. For example, he swears his fellow succeeding disciples to secrecy and reveals to them that Shen Jiu and him grew up together as slaves and that his little sworn brother was sold to an abusive noble house. Everyone's reception of Shen Jiu and his prickliness is very different this time around. Especially Liǔ Qīnggē and Qi Qingqi are more polite and Shěn Jiu far less hostile in turn.

Yuè Qīngyuán remembers from his last life what the Huan Hua palace master will tell them about Su Xiyan spying on the heavenly demon Tianlang-Jun. After seeing her resemblance to Luò Bīnghé, Yuè Qīngyuán is convinced that was either an outright lie or he omitted a lot of what happened beside this. In any case, those two must never meet so that there will never be a future mad demon-lord!

This is easier said than done, though. He has no idea where the two met. Yuè Qīngyuán had enough knowledge about establishing the importance of spy-networks in his last life. The one they had then was sadly bad. But now that he knows this, he finds some people himself who inform him about what is going on around the Huan Hua territory. Tianlang-Jun and his general are weird enough to attract attention at once, disguises notwithstanding.

Yuè Qīngyuán immediately rushes to where the demon-lord was spotted. He is prepared to find a menacing, spying monster hell-bent on conquering the human realm and plans to lure him away to an unpopulated area. Once there, he would alert the sect with an emergency flare talisman to the danger, even though he knows they won't be able to defeat the heavenly demon emperor without the preparation that went into the siege at Bailu mountain. But he hopes this will at least make it impossible for Tianlang-Jun and Su Xiyan to meet. And, who knows, maybe she dies in the later upcoming battles, thus ensuing they can't have a child later.

Instead, he finds an easily distracted, embarrassingly lewd, yet strangely charming weirdo who loves trashy romance novels and eagerly takes every opportunity to learn more about human culture. It becomes understandable why Su Xiyan had (most likely consensually) dallied with this demon rather quickly. And unless Tianlang-Jun is the best actor in all three realms, which Yuè Qīngyuán highly doubts, he's not interested in conquest or war with the human realm at all.

Yuè Qīngyuán decides the best course of action is to keep him entertained in Cang Qiong territory until he is satisfied and peacefully leaves again.

Yuè Qīngyuán has ample experience with diplomacy, decades worth. How hard can it be? As it turns out, in Tianlang-Jun's case: not at all! And after Yuè Qīngyuán finds out that beside culture and art, a bit of ruthlessness and a firm hand is appealing to the demon-lord, it works even better. He can do this!

It works far too well!

After a few weeks of dumping novels and other art on him, leading him around to theater plays and having friendly spars, Tianlang-Jun is making marriage proposals and showers him with courting gifts and bad self-written poetry. Worse yet, Yuè Qīngyuán finds that he very much would like to accept. He didn't think that was a possible result of his efforts. But then again, what better and certain way to hinder Tianlang-Jun from siring a child with Su Xiyan than capturing the heavenly demon's heart (and dick) for himself?

Tianlang-Jun is way too noticeable and too exuberant in his adoration to stay a secret for long. They manage to keep his demon nature secret, though. One and a half year after they first met, the old peak lords ascend and leave their successors in charge. As the sect leader, Yuè Qīngyuán has full access to security on the peaks and can design a space with safety measures that can hide his demon lover visiting.

They wait another 10 years until his leadership of the sect and reputation is generally lauded by the entire cultivation world, then Yuè Qīngyuán announces that he will enter peace and alliance talks with the demon realm. Eventually he announces that he will marry Tianlang-Jun for peace with the demon-emperor's domain and protection from rivaling or hostile demon forces.

The other sects are outraged once they learn about this, but can't really do much against it, since this alliance is for the safety of the human realm. Despite the former good standing, Cang Qiong and Yuè Qīngyuán in particular retain a bad rep in the cultivation world as corrupted after this, though.

Yuè Qīngyuán cares little. Their sect remains the strongest and their territory is so well protected that the mortal townsfolk loves them. Newcomers clamor to gain entry in droves. Tianlang-Jun is funny and a loving, attentive husband. The sex is awesome. Xiao-Jiu doesn't hate him and is safe. They are all safe from a revenge-obsessed Luo Binghe.

As far as Yuè Qīngyuán is concerned, the other sects can go fuck themselves if they are unhappy with the situation.

[katiesharms]

1-100, hangster 😜 (you pick)

(nina chose a sad one, sorry)

just like heaven - the cure you, soft and only/you, lost and lonely

jake's learned a lot about bradley over the years.

small things, like how he takes his coffee and the way he yells at the tv when baseball is on. big things, like his mom's favorite meal and just how dark those years away from mav were. like an onion, he's peeled back the layers of bradley, slowly and surely, to reveal the tender and raw heart of the matter. something raw and bruised and full of grief, papered over with half-hearted reconciliations and shallow relationships.

jake was always jealous of bradley, those years before they were together. of the way people gravitate towards the other pilot, instantly liking him, immediately falling under his gravity. jake's always had to work for, had to work for everything, and it seemed to come so naturally for bradley. he knows now that's not the truth.

bradley, in many ways, is a master performer. it took jake years to learn the brash and charismatic public personality that is rooster fades away in private, becomes something soft and lonely when rooster reverts back to bradley.

it can drain him, sometimes, to be what people expect of him. someone doing party tricks and attracting all the attention in the room. sometimes, jake can spot him across the party and see bradley's eyes grow dreary, the spark leaving them. that's usually when he'll jump in, divert attention to himself to give his boyfriend time and space to breathe.

today, it seems especially bad. not even an hour into phoenix's christmas party, and bradley's smile is wooden, his eyes dead. jake's standing in the opposite corner, catching up with coyote, when he hears bradley's laugh, affected and hollow. it sends a shiver down his spine to hear the man he loves sound so far from joy.

"excuse me," he says to coyote, who just nods in understanding, and he worms his way through the crowd towards rooster.

"hey babe," he greets when he reaches bradley, kissing him quickly and then settling in by his side. bradley throws an arm around his waist, pulling jake into him. jake follows easily, letting bradley nestle his face into the crook of jake's neck, his mustache tickling the sensitive skin.

"hey," bradley muffles into his neck.

jake looks up and sees the crowd bradley was entertaining has slowly started to dissipate, driven away by the cloying pda that bradley tends to engage in when he's in one of his moods.

"you looked like you needed rescuing," jake explains, bringing a hand up to the back of bradley's neck to play with the loose hairs there. he feels bradley shiver at the touch.

that's another thing jake's learned about bradley over the past few months. even the gentlest of touches, the most casual placement of jake's hand over bradley's body, has the other man reacting strongly.

"i did," bradley confirms, lifting his head to look at jake. his eyes are rimmed with dark circles, shooting worry through jake.

"let's get out of here, yeah?" he asks, and when bradley nods, jake weaves them towards the door without saying any goodbyes.

bradley drove them there, but jake takes his keys and slides into the driver's seat of the bronco. bradley doesn't protest, just slumps into the passenger seat.

they drive in silence for the first ten minutes, letting the gentle christmas music flow through the radio speakers.

"christmas is really hard," bradley says softly as they exit the highway, head leaning against the window, eyes closed. "it always has been but this year, it feels worse."

"do you want to talk about it?" jake asks carefully.

bradley huffs out a sigh. "yeah. no. i don't know. it sucks to talk about and it sucks to not talk about and it all just..." he trails off.

"sucks," jake fills in, and bradley cracks a smile, the corner of his mouth turning up. "well, how about this? i'll get us home, make you some hot chocolate, and then we can talk or not talk or whatever you want."

"yeah," bradley agrees. "that sounds really nice."

and hour later, when they're in pajamas and curled up together on the couch, a blanket thrown over the two of them, bradley speaks.

"christmas was my mom's favorite holiday. even after we moved to san diego, away from her family, she made it the warmest holiday in the world. and it's silly, but-" bradley cuts himself off.

jake brings his hand up to play with bradley's hair where his head is reasting on jake's chest. the two of them are laid along their slightly too small couch, bradley on top of jake.

"but what?" jake gently encourages.

"i've always avoided anything real around now because i knew i'd want to introduce them to my mom. and all i want in the world right now is to show my mom the man i love."

jake can feel wetness on his chest, and he knows bradley is crying. he cups bradley's face, forcing the man to look up at him. he brushes a tear off bradley's face.

"i would've loved to meet her," he says, and bradley smiles, weak. "why don't you tell me about her?"

bradley nods and sits up, bringing jake with him, and starts talking.

[batmanego]

💘🍝aaaand would you do the whole people block for myfriend 🔒🐦 <- jailbird (do youlike the pictures ?)

i love your picture.

💘 HEART WITH ARROW — what and/or who do(es) your oc consider the most important to them?

the most important person in jailbird's life is, bar none, his father. at the end of the story, it's the rest of new blood.

🍝 SPAGHETTI — what is/are your oc’s favorite food(s)?

couscous royale!

😊 SMILING FACE WITH SMILING EYES — what are your oc’s career/general life desires? what do they want to get the most out of life?

jailbird could, if he desired, take over his family's tech company. but he doesn't really have a huge interest in corporate life. at the beginning of the story, his goal is to kill as many superheroes as possible. at the end, he wants to open a bird sanctuary.

😖 CONFOUNDED FACE — is your oc an introvert, an extrovert, or an ambivert? do they let people in easily, or are they more reserved?

jailbird is extremely private. he does not like people knowing things about him.

🤔 THINKING FACE — what are some of your oc’s quirks/mannerisms?

shuffling with his shirt sleeves and chewing on his shirt collar. he also pulls at his own hair when he's upset. he also puts his hand to his mouth a lot when thinking.

🧐 FACE WITH MONOCLE — is your oc more logical or emotional?

he'd like to think he's more logical, but he's a 14 year old boy under tremendous amounts of stress.

🤓 SMILING FACE WITH GLASSES — is your oc chatty or quiet? are they at ease in social situations, or are they more shy?

i wouldn't say jailbird is quiet, but he's not friendly. he gives a lot of unsolicited advice and a lot of it is mean. he's not at ease in social situations, he's just not, like. shy. he's mean.

🤩 FACE WITH STARRY EYES — is your oc a planner, or are they more spontaneous in their actions?

meticulous planner.

😥 SAD BUT RELIEVED FACE — is your oc prone to getting stressed out, or is it easy for them to keep their cool?

jailbird has never known peace and never will.

😓 DOWNCAST FACE WITH SWEAT — is your oc open-minded or stubborn? are they inquisitive or do they prefer to keep to their bubble of knowledge?

STUBBORN STUBBORN STUBBORN. clinging to the last vestiges of his worldview until he DIES.

😞 DISAPPOINTED FACE — does your oc attract others, or do they tend to be left alone?

he wants to be left alone. and most people want to leave him alone, but then they realize how fucked up he is and feel like it would be irresponsible to leave him by himself.

🤒 FACE WITH THERMOMETER — does your oc get sick easily?

i think jailbird gets sick the normal amount.

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 FAMILY WITH MOTHER, FATHER, SON AND DAUGHTER — how many people are in your oc’s immediate family? how many people are in your oc’s extended family? do they have aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, etc? who in their family are they closest with? are they close with their birth family, or do they have a found family?

jailbird is an only child. he has a mother and a father. he also has one paternal uncle and two cousins: billie and joshua moon. he also has his maternal grandmother and both of his paternal grandparents, but never really sees them. in the future eugene becomes a brother figure to him and his dad becomes a father figure to him.

[spry-the-artist]

Yet another Frantic Fanfics solo run. Same stats as last time. A lot less structured then last time I feel, though I do enjoy this one a bit more since I never was all that into romance (which was last one’s main thing). I accidentally uploaded the image of the fic instead of the txt so I had to run it through an image to text translator. So, the prompts each part had are still visible (at the end of each part instead of the little “-“ separating everything)

TITLE: SELF IMPRISONEMENT

CHARACTERS : BENDY, SAMMY

There was about five different outcomes here, now that both Sammy and his “Lord” were stuck in the same room underground:

Sammy becomes free of his inky prison

Bendy kills Sammy

Sammy kills Bendy

They sit in silence

They become friends

Of course, Sammy was begging for the first option. No more summonings, no more sacrifices to attract his attention. They were stuck together, Bendy could no longer avoid him. After giving him so many meals throughout the years, well, Sammy felt like he was owed this.

Bendy would've been quite pleased with just eating the man, but Sammy wasn't just some Lost One or Searcher. He would put up a fight that Bendy quite simply didn't have the energy for. So, he had to settle for the other option he could feasibly do: becoming friends. Well, that and sitting in silence, but the two were practically immortal and it would start becoming long.

“So, uh, Sammy..."

Sammy straightened himself, “Yes, my lord?.

“You... wanna play something. Or... um... talk?"

The prophet wouldn't lie about how excited he was currently. But, he also couldn't lie that he was disappointed in not getting his prize immediately.

“I remember vaguely playing a game called Truth or Dare! It doesn't have an end so it could pleasure you for all eternity!”

PROMPT: TRAPPED UNDERGROUND

“Damn, we really do have all eternity, huh?" Anyways, what's the game about?”

***

“My Lord, truth or dare?”

The game was fun, don't get Bendy wrong, but they'd been playing it for well over 4 hours. Ah, well, may as well answer a few more.

“Truth”

Sammy went quiet for a good minute, his voice came back cold, "Why haven't you freed me from this inky prison?"

“Sammy, I-"

He became more agitated, "After everything I've done for you! I created a religion, I created your rituals, I even made sacrifices for you! There are now tens if not hundreds of lost souls who see you as their god! And yet, no matter what I do, you never give anything back!”

The tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife.

“Sammy, you know that I'm the one supposed to tell stuff, right? Not you." Sammy grunted, "Answer My Question”

“talks a lot for a guy i could easily kill..." the Ink Demon whispered, “Anyways, for that question of yours. I can't.”

“What do you mean “you can't“?! I’ve seen you place so many people in your prison of darkness, and yet you can't get them out of it?!"

“Oh, I just kill people. They get some of my ink in their system and eventually it takes over. When you're dead, it takes over a lot quicker,” Bendy chuckled, "I remember it taking over ya when you were alive. It was... slow... but you came out pretty alright! Don't get me wrong, I love having people worship me. Just..., don't expect anything out of it."

PROMPT: CONFRONTATION

Sammy sat still for far to long after Bendy said that, ‘What do you mean by that?"

“Well, when people get my ink in their system, they turn into ink creatures. As long as I exist, they're probably stuck in the same prison I am”

“No, what do you mean I was alive when it happened?”

Bendy went to pat his worshipper's head, "Ah, Sammy, don't tell me you didn't know! Surely you've seen other people drink some ink when they were alive!"

“I... don't remember much before all this..."

If Bendy could frown, he would, "Ah jeez.., well, the reason why you're wacko,” Sammy crossed his arms at that, “is because you drunk a bunch of ink. It was like poison, slowly spreading throughout every part of ya before you eventually,” he snapped his fingers. “Why... why would I keep drinking it. Surely I would've noticed myself becoming more and more imprisoned!"

"I don't know! By the way you were acting, I think it was a drug,” Bendy now scratched his “chin”, "Yeah, I remember! Joey used to drip it in your coffee! Your coffee gave you the energy you needed so you started associating the taste of my ink with good stuff. 'Ventually, you just started drinking the ink on its own.”

Sammy once again sat still for far too long. “Sorry, Sammy, but I can't get you outta that prison of yours.

You're kinda the one who poisoned yourself”

PROMPT: POISON