#these things that we r calling transandrophobia

[endykelopaedia]

really wanna have a real read somewhere about concepts like transandrophobia because i wanna believe theres a better way to talk about discrimination against transmascs that isnt just like a reactionary kickback to transfems describing their experiences. but like whenever i look it up its always some shit about how trans women are hating on & silencing trans men & also feminism made men seek comfort in the right which are totally normal things to say & think & feel about women guys. what are we doing

[shaingles]

This post might come off out of left field, since it’s unrelated to what I usually post, but i need to scream into the void.

• Transmisogyny is a term for trans women/fems. Not trans men or trans mascs. Trans women and trans fems.

Idk why, but I’m seeing an influx of people (mostly on tiktok) trying to convince trans men/mascs that bigotry uniquely targeted towards us is called either “regular transphobia,” “regular misogyny,” or “transmisogyny,” usually in response to a trans man/masc refereeing to it as transandrophobia or anti-transmasculinity. Additionally I’ve seen people try to say that “transandrophobia/Anti-transmasculinity doesn’t exist” because “trans women/fems have it worse.” Tiktok commenters are good at one thing, and it’s being LOUD AND WRONG !!! And its always cis “allies” doing this. Why are we pitting trans people against each other hello??

• Anti-transmasculinity exists, and we are presented with it constantly. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to recognize that trans men/mascs are treated differently from trans women/fem—and no, it’s not trans men/mascs being “more privileged,” because we’re not. The victimization and infantilization of trans men/mascs (“confused young girls” rhetoric) is a good example of Anti-transmasculinity. Another is r*dfems/t*rfs calling us “gender traitors” and saying we “hating ourselves.” Being treated as a fetish, while affecting all trans people, varies differently depending on the group targeted, like how black people are fetishized, but black women are fetishized differently from black men. Ergo, trans men/mascs face a unique kind of fetishization (mostly from cis men) that differs from trans women/fems. With these few examples in mind, this leads to my next point…

• Trans men/mascs are NOT Cis men!

Why are so many people so willing to ignore/dismiss trans-masculinity struggles just because trans-masculinity just so happen to include men?? Why are trans men being treated the same way as cis men?? Did y’all forget the TRANS part in TRANS men??

Just because a trans man is a man, doesn’t mean he suddenly gains male privilege, especially if he’s openly queer or don’t fit conventional gender norms. The only ones that do are the ones that pass, and not every trans man is a cishet-passing individual. It’s even more egregious when the target is a white trans man/masc, because suddenly people forget that trans men/mascs of color don’t exist, and when they do remember us they act like trans men/mascs of color have the same “privileges” as white trans men/mascs, or even cis white men because “male privilage” and/or “AFAB privilege (???)” im sorry, what???

Im a pre-t & pre-op black transmasc, I don’t recall gaining the privilege of a cis white man just because i go by he/they 🤔 I must’ve missed the update or something.

Anywho to sign this off: These are probably uninformed children or trolls causing an unnecessary divide between the community + its tiktok + it’s better to battle transphobia/transmisogyny/anti-transmasculinity irl than online, so honestly I shouldn’t let these obtuse things get to me. I’m just putting this here to get it out my brain.

[softbutchthatlovesyou]

First things first: I am not deactivating. Just. Taking a break.

Mututals: You can get my discord if I don't ask for yours before I leave in a couple days. You can also give me a snap though I may be worse at responding to that.

This is my reasons for leaving so no one thinks I do anything crazy, or if anyone has their own gripe they can take this as a sign to take a mental health break of your own.

.

The Racism on this site remains unchecked, and the agression against black user who call it out should absolutely NOT be that high. You adore recreating the racist systems that got us here in the first place. You think your lense on how we experience opression, even the theories we wrote, are better and clearly so much superior.

Exorsexism is disgustingly rampant. We are a jokes to people. We are fakes to other. We are a convenient argument about people passing. We are "dangerous" to a preciously protected set of binaries that do nothing to help any of us.

Lesbophobia across the site has no reason to be so high on a site with so many Lesbians and yet!! We treat labels like they're more important than lives. People act like a personal interpretation of the idenity is an attack. We go "Being a Lesbian is so complex. It's intricate and special" And then when a butch takes t, or a femmes uses he and maybe even gets top surgery, or someones attraction isnt the simply wlw Lesbianism they're told they're doing it wrong and that it's not fair to try and over complicate being a lesbian.

Transandrophobia and Transmisogyny against me and other trans people on this site is out of control. People are infighting and people are lashing out laterally and comparing it 1:1 to the opression the system holds against all of us.

Intersexism continues to be like, so easy for you guys to commit no matter how many voices speak up about how best to be aware of intersex issues.

You guys adore ableism just as you have for years and years. You're obsessed with degrading people who do mental illness or disability "wrong." You see someone stuggling with illness and you don't wait to tell them your personal opinion on their experience. Adding ocd triggering guilt tripping to post. Refusing to hear out people about adding image ids/alt images and how screen readers work.

The Antisemitism I was seeing well before 10/7 was gross. It only increased as people scrambled not to be associated with "the bad jew." People had mutuals and friends for years that abandoned them at the first chance. They spread lies or twisted truths in order to chose Jewish bloggers off the site. I DO notice that when people make post on antisemitism there is often more Jewish people than goy in the notes acknowledging it. I don't think I've seen one without horrid Antisemitism in it's own notes in months. Multiple people have told me to leave my heritage out of pride in their attempts to keep out Jewish people.

Voices from Palstine are only used when they support certain ideas. You all turned supporting people into a fucking witch hunt against profiles on the Internet. You reblog a post of Palastine joy and then reblog an unsourced tweet about something Palstinians have said isn't true, that slanders Jewish people unprompted. For a long time some of you weren't even sharing the right sources for helping them bc you couldn't fact check before sharing?

-

And then there's fucking STAFF. They couldn't stop themselves from banning trans blogs if you paid them. They couldn't keep harassment campaigns at bay if it killed someone.

They used us to coax queer people here for years by sharing that they support queer identities and even at one point let our porn exist here! And then it was all fucking wiped off the map. Now one mass reporting of an untrue claim can get an minorties blog permanently removed.

They say "We need money!" but when people gave it to them this site got w o r se. They use distractions and try and make stuff around the fun shit we came up with to keep us from fussing.

They mute and remove users who make a loud enough point to sway people. They mute and removes uses that are so quiet no one would notice.

Minorties inboxes are a headache.

.

So I'm out. I'll probably be back at some point because I have things I DO enjoy here.

But for mental health I just gotta catch my breath.

This will be my pinned until I get back I guess im case anyone wonders where I went.

I'll have a queue going of a few last minute things i want on my blog but when it runs out thats it for a while until I return.

Thats all

[sapphicsvibes]

ill be honest with you 'transandrophobia' used to be called 'transmisandry' before they realized it was too on the nose, and the originator of the term also openly blogs about a lesbophobic r*pe kink that I dont want to even name.

There's definitely a need for transmascs and trans men to be heard given what I've seen from some transmascs who feel isolated even from other transmascs as they try and find a place for themselves where they feel supported and heard, but as a trans woman 'transandrophobia' shit is not it. it's 90% trans men talking over trans women and the originator of that term joked about being in 'the transmisogynist groupchat' like throwing trans women under the bus to take ownership of trans community will not create a healthy space for anyone.

Personally I think it's something that has to come from trans men being more supportive of trans women without letting the feeling of the invisibility of their plight embitter them against their sisters, like noone else is more able to understand some of what you go through than we are, but I have seen enough transmisogynistic sentiment out of the 'transandrophobia' crowd that I block it on sight, I have a small collection if posts that I've screenshotted if anyone ever asks why. Some part of me still wants to believe trans men could be community to us, but its going to take honest effort from trans men at a community level to make that effort, and right now I just see trans men who want to throw us under the bus to make themselves feel better and gather rapport with other tme queer people. Because it really is as easy as saying 'see these mean trans women say we dont suffer as much say we dont have it as bad as them theyre talking over us' and put words in our mouth instead of building community with us and cis people clap clap clap and reblog.

Trans men who feel isolated deserve a healthier community, and trans women deserve better than 'transandrophobia' rhetoric in our community.

The idea that it stemmed from a term like transmisandry is weird to me. Transmen aren’t oppressed for being men, that’s just transphobia. Misandry doesn’t exist. 

I also had no idea that it started from someone who did weird shit like that - it really makes me scrutinize the people who use the term harder. How can a group like that actually be a safe space for anyone if the creator supports that shit?

but as a trans woman 'transandrophobia' shit is not it. it's 90% trans men talking over trans women and the originator of that term joked about being in 'the transmisogynist groupchat' like throwing trans women under the bus to take ownership of trans community will not create a healthy space for anyone.

This is genuinely terrifying but at the same time, not surprising at all. And I say this because I mean, this is literally what I’ve seen. I had no idea about the group chat, which is insane in itself, but when you say 90% is speaking over trans women, that’s literally what I see in the tag. Even when I look in the transmisogyny tags, it’s usually, if not always, filled with posts that are tagged transandrophobia, and I feel that more and more posts about trans fems gets buried. (That and the whole, perish afab trans fem people getting a lot more vocal).

To me at least, it’s just repackaged misogyny on all fronts, with a sprinkle of lesbophobia. 

I think the sad thing about your take on community is that, it shows that a lot of trans men have not really shed their transmisogynstic mindsets that they grew up with. They still have these ideas that trans fems are inhernetly dangerous to them, and that trans fems are trying to hurt them, and this is a mindset that was implemented in their since before many of them identified with their grandness or even knew they were trans. We grow up in a society that spoonfeeds us terf beliefs and reinforces those as we get older. And as people who grow up thinking we are cis women, we are often times made to be the main victims of trans fems. 

And even when we do come out as trans, etc., some of us still think those harmful thoughts and don’t bother to challenge them. It is because we are trans, that we think we are above challenging and dismantling thing harmful thoughts. What I’ve found with the transandrophobia people, is that, this community gives them space to validate those thoughts. It gives them a safe space to feel truly victimized by transfems thus, they don’t actually feel the need to challenge those thoughts because people in those group are telling them that it’s a normal part of the trans man experience. 

Also, it’s crazy because I find the whole movement excludes trans mascs who aren’t trans men. I am trans masc but I’m also not a man, and I have trauma from men - both cis men and trans men, so a group like that just isn’t for me. I’ve been dealt a bad hand by both trans and cis men LMAO. So like, I don’t feel at home in such a community.

And some of the things i've seen these men say about lesbians......

But anyway, I do think trans men deserve a space and a term and a healthier community but the transandrophobia group is really big unfortunately.

I’m really sorry for any transfems who are often times stuck in the crossfires of this and made to feel unsafe or just bad for existing.

[tiedupwithabow]

if you support israel, do not touch this blog ❤︎

formerly @airheadfemme, but tumblr hates me and terminated my account, so here we go again!

my wonderful friend and mutual @gothcoffins and i have a very lovely discord server if anyone would like to join (must be a 20+ year old femme4butch lesbian)!

about me:

~ 22 years old

~ white and transmisogyny exempt

~ ofos nonbinary high femme lesbian

~ very happily taken by @mistlestonebutch ❤︎

~ submissive to a fault, but experimenting more with my dominant side

~ fat, disabled, chronically ill, and neurodivergent (adhd, autistic, bipolar)

~ i use they/them pronouns with everyone except my butch, who i prefer to refer to me using she/her pronouns

~ i love getting asks, and i will do my best to answer all of them in a timely manner, but i sometimes struggle with severe brain fog and it can make typing well written responses very hard. if you see me active on here, but i haven't answered your ask yet, that's probably why!

~ due to the aforementioned brain fog, i often make a lot of original posts on days when i'm feeling well, and they end up either queued or in my drafts until i decide to post them.

dni, tags, kinks, limits, and more under the cut

do not interact if you are:

~ a minor

~ a man (cis or trans)

~ an ed or feeder blog

~ a defender of "bisexual lesbians" or anything similar

~ someone who believes that nonlesbians can use the terms dyke, butch, or femme

~ someone who believes that nonblack nonlesbians can use the terms stud, fish, and stem(me)

~ a defender of harmful "kinks" such as ag*play/ddlg, r*pe (anything beyond dubious consent), inc*st, "orientation play"/corrective r*pe, r*ce play, etc

~ a racist, zionist (two staters included), transmisogynist (this includes terfs, ppl who believe in "transandrophobia", ppl who think trans men can be lesbians, etc), fatphobic person, or any other sort of bigot that i may have forgotten to put

my tags:

#the airhead speaks - my original posts

#my good butch ❤︎ - posts (including rbs) about domming

#taking notes - posts i want to look at again later

#🛡️- posts that remind me of my butch or that were rb'd from my butch will be tagged (bc they're my knight and i'm their princess ❤︎)

#beloved femmes ❤︎ - typically just pictures of femmes that i think are gorgeous (all compliments are platonic)

#my pics - idk p self explanatory but the few times i post pictures they'll be here haha

#ask me things! - ask games and prompts

#answered things - all of my answered asks

kinks:

~ praise

~ bondage

~ choking

~ breeding

~ blasphemy

~ corruption

~ possession

~ degradation

~ hair pulling

~ play fighting

~ objectification

~ overstimulation

~ regency/royalty

~ dubious consent

~ butch patriarchy

~ light impact play

~ exhibitionism (in theory)

~ dumbification/bimboification

~ intox (i rarely post ab it though)

~ free use (in an explicitly consensual way)

~ calling my butch daddy (as a title, mostly in the context of breeding)

~ roleplay (usually experienced dyke + innocent church girl, cocky tutor + airhead tutee, "bad boy"/loner butch + cheerleader, boss + maid, and other/potentially more embarrassing stuff)

limits:

~ anal

~ scat, blood, piss, etc

~ the harmful "kinks" referenced in my dni

if you add anything to my post that makes me uncomfortable (including mentioning one of my limits* in the tags), i will instantly block you.

*this excludes an*l as i'm aware that many people can only experience penetration anally, but please use as vague of phrasing as possible (ex: using the term "hole" rather than anything more descriptive)

[pallpokipoki]

recent ish is shown me I have no solidarity with male trans people. If they can ignore us dying..n tell us that any discussion of transandrophobia is bigotry… misgender us whenev they wanna compare us to terfs for daring 2 speak out of line… ignore the statistics around rape of trans men…exclude us, and calling us “theyfabs” and “transandrobros”, insult us…and never ever ever show up for us on any issue we face despite us always doing so for them, well, ok… I don’t consider them my friends. I don’t consider them my sisters. I don’t consider them part of my community. all da dudes telling themselves they got privilege, so they gotta support more oppressed….. bro wakedafuckup. U r the more oppressed group. They r punching down when they talk about you dis way.

Not only that, but they even try to destroy any form of solidarity that trans men/mascs might find with other afab groups, they also frequently try to pit these groups against each other in various ways or making them believe that it's pointless to create a solidarity based on being afab because afabs don't constitute a coherent class (but on the other hand, they call them ''TME'', and present them as an coherent, well defined oppressors class lol) or they say it's even transmisogynist to create such solidarity (but they have no problem creating amab solidarities). This is an anti-afab, amab supremacist tactic deployed by transfems, that prevents the formation of an afab coalition to confront amab supremacy, because they'll see that as a form of TERFim.

To understand why they interact with transmascs, afab enbies and cis females in the way they do, you have to understand that one of their main goal is to:

• increase amab social, political, and personal control over afabs (because they fundamentally see afabs as a collective TERF threat that therefore needs to me dealt with. That's why they justify with progressive language their amab supremacist tactics) to prevent a political coalition based on being afab to abolish amab supremacy.

I should add that they probably don't explicitly think these things, framed in this way "i want to mantain amab supremacy by preventing afabs to create their own coalition")... BUT 1) these are the practical effects of their ideologies and behaviors, 2) they probably frame in their minds those amab supremacist ideas as not amab supremacist and even as anti-oppression using progressive language ("i have to prevent TME/afabs from forming afab solidarity because it will reinforces terfisme/transmisogynist oppression".. instead of the former). They are not themselves fully aware that they have amab supremacist views.

Once you get this, you'll better understand many of their discourse and inconsistencies, why they spread misleading narratives about transmasc people, how patriarchy works, the gender class system, why they try to make others believe that they have no connection with the male class, why they deny the social significance of ASAB but sometimes recognize it to frame amab trans ppl' as oppressed and afabs as the oppressors, why they try to position trans men as part of the male class & thus as the enemies of women and enbies, why they created the idea of "tme privilege", why they deny the fact that afabs have common experiences and are a coherent class, why they recognize afabs as coherent class that is antagonistic to transfems, why they try to pit afabs against each others and make believe that their actual 'siblings' are these amab groups rather than other afabs....and so on.

And yes, the trans "solidarity" is one-sided. It's the transmascs who show the most support to transfems, who serve their interests rather than the other way around, and these services can even lead transmascs to lie about their personal situation and that of transmascs in general to satisfy transfems' interests. It's important for transmascs to realize that this has always been the case since the inception of the trans movement. They have always been pushed aside by transfems because transfems are misogynists who behave and think explicitly or implicitly in amab supremacist ways.

[luminae-system]

(Never did make an Intro Post. Placeholder!)

Luminae System! 🌟

[Pt: Luminae System! 🌟]

Quoigenic System of 3!

Collective name is Luminae or Lumina, They/Them (theirself or selves is fine) for collective pronouns. Feel free to call us Lumi affectionately if we are mutuals. We are bisexual and nonbinary collectively.

Bodily: 19 years old, latine 🇲🇽, afab perisex, birthday is June 22nd :3

Interaction is highly encouraged! Even a single like to our posts makes our day, reblogs are amazing, and golly we'd love asks.

Headmates:

Danny✨️ - Main fronter, frontstuck host

Daena 🌑 - Reformed persecutor, Local edgelord (/aff)

Aelius 🐈‍⬛ - Protector/Caretaker (Getting the milk /j, unavailable at the moment)

For term nerds like us:

Specutien / Proxy system

Monoconcious

Suspected P-DID? Heavy on the "not sure"

Dni under the cut bc long, tldr: Exclus, r@dqueer, transmed, sysmed, right-wing, anti good faith "contradictory" labels, pr0ship/c0mship, t3rf, sw3rf, r4dfem, discourse only blogs and NSFW blogs (interact through other blogs please), anti alterhuman, proshitrael, racist, ableist, bigots in general.

DNI is a long list, we block very freely, but here are the highlights.

Sysmeds, Anti-endogenic systems. We are very pro endogenic!

Anti parogenic/willogenic/tulpamancy/Created systems (we support both terminologies, we feel like it's s not really our place to intervene as a very latine system!)

Blogs that are fully and only for syscourse. (Feel free to interact through other blogs, just don't reblog our stuff in there please). Or any blog that is only for any discourse, really

Believe "Demo systems" are a thing

Fakeclaimer of systems, or anything really.

R@dqueers + Tr@nsid/tr@nsx (Arissomei, biid, and Chronosians welcome!)

Pro/complex contact harmful paras (we are pro-recovery, dont feel afraid if you have something like p-ocd! But if you are encouraging those sorts of things and/or celebrating them, please don't interact.)

On that topic, anti kink/sex work (whatever consenting adults do behind closed doors is none of your business)

Tr@nsmeds, T3rfs, sw3rfs, r4dfems, think nonbinary isn't real/valid, are weird about multigender people and their sexualities, etc. It's all transphobia

Think trans men & transmascs don't deserve their own word for their discrimination / anti transandrophobia

Anti Mspec mono (Bi lesbians/gays for example), anti he/him lesbians and she/her gays, anti lesboys and turigirls, etc. Basically anti good-faith "contradictory" identities that "make us look like a joke" (nice bootlicking, very clean. They surely will pick you)

Think lesbian is "nonman loving nonman" and viceversa (excludes multigender people, exorsexist)

Aro/Ace exclusionists. Yes, an Ace heteroromantic cisgender perisexual man is still lgbtq, and is not "invading our spaces"

Anti xenogender/neogenders, anti mogai, anti neopronouns, anti microlabels in general.

Being weird about nonbinary people in general, aka exorsexism.

Use amab and afab as a new binary to fit nonbianry people into

Intersexist, weird about the sexualities and genders of intersex people, weird about transfem afabs and transmasc amabs

PR0SHIP/C0MSHIP, C0NSANG, "Fiction doesn't affect reality in any way" (We have a more nuanced opinion than just "never depict anything bad, everything sanitized!" Hyper-antiship, but we are definitely not pr0ship. Ew.)

Proud and non/anti-recovering (N0)-M4Ps, Z00s, N3cros

Nsfw/kink blogs (nothing wrong! Just uhhhh, this is a sfw blog, and we'd like to keep it that way. Feel free to interact through another blog!)

Sexualizes age regression / pet regression or is anti these two (it's a coping thing)

Anti otherkin, otherhearted, otherlink, copinglink, alterhuman in general. (Host is cathearted/copinglink! @alterhuman-shenanigans )

Anti casual kin or "kin for fun". We understand the dilution of the term is a real problem, but please correct people and give alternatives, or just block and move on. Don't harrass people!

Think suibaiting and harrasment is okay under any circumstances. Even the most "evil" people don't deserve harassment. Block and report and move on.

Ableist of any kind. This blog is run by a very tired neurodivergent and undiagnosed physically disabled system.

That includes anti (informed and reasearched) self diagnosis. Yes, even for physical stuff, though that requires a ton more research and acceptance that you may be wrong (please seek professional help if you can, though that is a privilege, we know.)

Demonizes Cluster B personality disorders, weird about personality disorders in general, think Narc abuse is real (abuse is not an inevitable Evil Disorder thing)

Uses the R-slur (ableist af!), uses autistic as an insult, or uses "is it acoustic?" as a joke

Uses slurs that you cannot reclaim

Anti reclamation of terms used against us (Dy, Tr, Fa, etc.), think Queer is a slur, think Butch and Femme are Lesbian Only (careful with that t3rf koolaid)

Anti-ACAB, Anti-BLM, Pro-Shitrael, "Neutral" on the Palestinian Genocide, Right wing in general, "both sides are equally bad" ultra centralist bs (just say you are right-wing and/or accept that staying silent is still supporting abusers)

Antisemitic, think all Jewish people are Zionists and harrass them. (we are antishitrael, read above point)

Antichoice ("pr0life", but as soon as the kid is born don't care about providing support to the kid and their parent(s).)

Any kind of policing bodily autonomy.

Racists

Etc. Will update as needed

[iatrophilosophos]

There's such a deepset paranoia among a lot of transmasc scenes that transmasc people will just Be Seen As Women, alongside a total unwillingness to analyze gendered position and power dynamics outside of a western cis feminist framework with a few words swapped out (e.g. trans dudes who complain about ~sexual harassment~ when they get unsolicited dick pics on Grindr. Boy why u on the dick pic app if ur gonna freak out about dick pics?)

That's one of the really frustrating things about ~transandrophobia~ to me, like there is a legit reason for cafab trans people to do gender hierarchy analysis, transphobia is a thing, but instead we get "oh do you know transmisogyny? Well now there's a boy version and a genderqueer version and-". And I get that like, transandrophobia generally functions to refuse trans women the ability to talk about unique and distinct patterns of oppression that are not adequately analyzed through other lenses; and absolutely some people are doing this intentionally but will never admit that so it makes sense to just treat as hostile.

I'd hazard a guess that large swaths of cafab trans people generally are unwilling to engage in the kind of analysis I would like to see discussed bc of the aforementioned refusing to abandon cisfeminism thing--because that would involve acknowledging that victim narratives go beyond oppression analysis into a way in which cafab people are permitted to wield gendered power, and the paranoia about being ~just seen as women~ means ppl call bioessentialism when you try to talk about connections between cis women wielding gendered power thru victimhood narratives in broader society & cafab trans people doing the same within trans scenes... When actually yknow kind of a major thing about trans people's gendered position in society is that we are seen as other and yknow mayhaps A Reason you see so many cafab trans ppl wielding transmisogyny is that being trans does in fact other us from cis female power in broader society and ppl will often seek and wield power in the ways that r available to them

Idk that last bit is a fucking Mess and I don't think actually says what im trying to say. Mostly like, power structure analysis =/= inherent victimhood and ~privilege~ frameworks are actually an extremely shitty way to analyze power hierarchies...and a lot of my transmasc peers did start towards gender exploration from a place of being centered in feminism and social justice culture and I think a lot of people like, never actually had a significant reason to make a legitimate ideological break from those, so you get victimhood, performative self-flagellation as an attempt to distance oneself from ~privilege~ in a way that helps nobody, aaaaaand usually it's a mix of both

[brainscrems]

I also see a heavy overlap in experience. Ime, I’ve seen jumblr be much more accepting of transandrophobia as a concept, i suspect this is because we see what people r saying abt transmascs and how it related to our own oppression. “Privileged and making it all up”, “your oppression exists, but I an outsider get to dictate to u how and when it does and if u can be upset abt it”, “oppression is only addressed when convenient for someone else’s narrative if at all”. Frankly, I suspect it’s because these people, who fundamentally DO believe jewish oppression is fake and overblown and not for jews to talk about except to serve other causes. And they see transmascs and think the same thing abt transmascs, so they call them filthy jews zionists to link them to us to discredit them the same ways they try and discredit us.

antisemitic conspiracy theories rot the brain.

[genderkoolaid]

Are we sharing examples or transandrophobia? I want to share especially as an autistic trans man and how that intersect. Tw for like mentions of r@pe but no detail. These specific incidents actually run through my mind almost constantly. I came out for the FIRST time when I was 16: -people refused to use the name I had chosen despite me pointing out that's stupid because out cis male friend had changed his name just because he didn't like it and all I was doing was dropping one letter

-my best friend told me that if I slept with a girl who thought I was a "real" man and after she found out I was trans I would have been a rapist for consensually going down on a girl who "thought I was a real man"

-I had a random girl in my class "ask if my ex bf knew I really had a dick" when I said I was trans

-my parents said "no matter what, you'll always be our little girl"

So, I went back into the closet for the most part. I went by She/They and was always like "im not a girl" but people pretty much brushed me off and I didn't pursue transition bc I was afraid of how people would treat me. I came out AGAIN at 21, this time really putting my foot down that I AM MALE.

-My aunt started to refer to my info dumping as "mansplaining" so I stopped sharing my interests with her

-People began to actively misgender me, whereas before some people would at least try to use they as well as she, I only get called she now and never they

-I started to get harassed in public for holding my partner's hand even tho we're both trans

-People really go out of their way to gender me now. "When I was a girl" nobody ever ma'amed me. NEVER, ever.

-People like to assume I'm mentally ill for being trans or that someone must have pushed me to be trans. Their pea brains implode when I say actually I really struggled to come out in the face of everyone telling me not to and I'm trans because I realized I'd die from trying to harm myself if I didn't accept who I already am

-I got sent a lot of death threats and rape threats. A lot. Mostly online, of course, but it really took me aback the negative reaction I had from the WLW spaces I was in when I said I was leaving because, well, I'm not a woman. Crypto terfs, man.

-My uncle said to me, and I quote "Keep this trans shit away from your grandmother, she has enough to deal with" I asked him what he expected me to do when I grew facial hair and muscles and lost my tits. He didn't answer, he probably didn't care.

-My aunt, who claimed to be the most accepting, still misgenders me and acts personally offended when I tell her she's not progressive for doing the bare minimum to show me respect, and not even consistently.

-My aunt ALSO told me I was the reason SHE wasnt getting HRT for her early menopause because "T is gonna make you angry and I don't want to be around that" (T made me calmer and less likely to EXPRESS my anger, actually. I have to find different ways to let it out now bc I kinda just CANT feel angry or sad the same way anymore)

-None of my family has called me to ask me how I'm doing since i came out. They all kinda avoid talking to me, but won't say it, I've noticed though.

-My partner's mom told me she wanted me to go to therapy. I said I'd go for my PTSD as it was causing problems between her and I, she said "No, I want you to go for 'this'" Meaning, she wanted me to go to therapy for being trans. My partner got upset at this and said that absolutely would not be happening because being trans isnt a mental illness

-cis people look at me in TERROR when they misgender me, like they're waiting for me to freak out at them or physically assault them. It actually really hurts my feelings tbh, out of everything those moments sting the most. People I don't even know very well assuming the worst of me for being trans.

Idk just the pure hatred people have towards transmascs and then for people withing our own communities to act like these things don't happen on the daily and don't drive us to have among the highest suicide rates out of any other demographic... It hurts. It really hurts, I want to cry over it and then still this little voice in my head, the voice THEY put there, says to me "Boys don't cry. if you show the slightest sign that these things hurt you, they won't take you seriously"

Thank you for sharing your experiences.

[8-evil-annoying-catboys]

recently heard that the person who coined the term transandrophobia believes corrective r/pe against lesbians is okay and is generally lesbophobic, and if im totally honest the term already didn’t sit well with me because androphobia is a medical condition (the irrational fear of men, irrational used here not to mean “unjustified” but because it’s the word used to describe phobias, and to mean “getting in the way of the sufferer’s life” instead) that most commonly is suffered by sexual assault or sexual abuse survivors whose assailant or abuser was a man, so like… with this info i am going to discontinue using that term. i’m going back to the term “transmisandry” since our language doesn’t have to have the same etymology as transmisogyny (as in, the intersection of transphobia and misogyny, transmisandry not being able to be described as the intersection of transphobia and misandry because institutional misandry doesn’t actually exist no matter what you believe about misandry on an individual scale—my personal beliefs being that what people call “misandry” is literally just reactionary sexism, just usually from a radfem perspective, because plain no extra additives type sexists generally also basically see women as inherently virtuous and pure and men as inherently more violent and sexual than women), but transmasculine people and specifically trans men still need a word to describe the specific type of transphobia we face that other trans people do not regardless of the etymology. i suggest, if you also decide to change your language this way, if anyone brings up the “misandry doesn’t exist” point, just state that transmasculine people just need language specific to our issues just like every other oppressed group. within the trans community, trans women and transfeminine people have the term transmisogyny to use, and genderqueer/nonbinary people have exorsexism. therefore, from a transmasculine perspective, having to go through multiple terms because the rest of the community has a problem with every term we come up with feels less like righteous and justified corrections and more like being silenced—something we are all too used to as it is one of the core forms of transmisandry. therefore, this language debate is lateral aggression, intentional or not.

speaking of the etymology thing, the new info about the term transandrophobia makes total sense when you think of it as a replacement for transmisandry directly related to the etymology debate—if it’s true that the person who coined the term is a corrective r/pe apologist, then OF COURSE he would think replacing “misandry” with “androphobia” to describe transmisandry instead as the intersection of transphobia and androphobia makes sense and is appropriate. that thought sends a chill down my spine tbh. that being said, even if that’s false, i’d rather say transmisandry because of the previously stated reason why “transandrophobia” doesn’t sit well with me. at least misandry by itself isn’t a real thing, much less a psychiatric condition usually suffered by women who are survivors of sexual assault. eesh.

[wild-wombytch]

RB to boost this so maybe it finds someone with more resources. The only thing I'm thinking off other than the MRA knockoff that transandrophobia is about (a proeminent blog of such ideology even has some unhinged sprees against radfems at times) are... genuinely detrans blogs. I'm sorry to even suggest them, my goal is not to push detransition on someone who might genuinely need it, the same way I don't think we should push transition on someone who might have others, bigger issues. I think the detrans community is the one talking about this misogyny the most because they typically get so much shit that at some point they stop caring and call it out. Also the blog butchisopods here is a FtM and I think you could ask if he's ok go talk about this? (TW because he has a shitty mental health as well).

I've also seen some posts on r/Transmeds that talked about how the trans community in general is a toxic place, but it didn't really cover sex-based oppressions. I believe there's a sub called "UncensoredFeminism" or something as well, where you might find a listening ear. It's explicitly not a "TERF" sub or anything, and it's definitely not libfem. Just a discussion sub.

If you don't get dysphoria from it OP (mental health first), I'd recommend directly reading stuff about sex class consciousness to understand why gender is an oppressive structure and how our sex is weaponized against us.

It really sucks that we don't hear more of you talk about this, due to the takeover trans women had of trans spaces, because it seems like a fairly common feeling among trans men when we talk or when I see documentaries and stuff that are about transness in general. I hope it will change in the following years. I think LGBs, trans men, detrans people, radfems and even genuinely dysphoric/transmed trans women ALL think of that very same category of insane authoritarian agp bullies that plague our different communities and have us kicked out (and make of both internet and real life a censorship haven)/ when we criticize the trans community.

Trans male here, though I know my identity would not be taken seriously here, I find myself wanting to rather get she/her’d by radfems then deal with the horrific misogyny I receive in online trans spaces. Trans men are constantly referred to as “cunts” and “bitches” and we’re not allowed disagree with trans women on certain topics. Are there any accounts you know of that document and discuss the way trans men are treated in the trans community that don’t sugarcoat it?

Also question, are you guys gender abolitionists? as I feel I makes a lot of sense to be that along with being a radfem.

hey :) sorry for the late answer, i was quite a bit busy the last couple of weeks

and first of all, I am not really in favor of using the pronouns of a person that they feel dysphoric about as long as they are not horrible people, but yeah, idk.

Referrring to people as their body parts is such a disgusting way of talking. They talk about you that way, but have a meltdown and threaten to kill themselves if you tell them they're male 😭 wtf

and yes, I am a gender abolitionist. I think that gender is a superstructure built to justify sex-based oppression, I have made a post about it :)

Another thing that I sometimes think when reading accounts like yours: I always find it strange how you are not allowed to mention the biological sex of the person you are interacting with in queer spaces, but it is totally okay to treat that person as a stereotypical member of their biological sex. Like, isn't talking over a trans man or intimidating him or sexually harassing him a much more severe form of "misgendering" than using the word "she"? I mean, I am not a trans man so I don't know, but I'd imagine that I'd feel much more dysphoric after being sexually harassed by a male for being female than if someone called me "she/her"? So that's what has always confused me a bit about trans-affirming spaces.

And no, I don't know about any blogs about misogyny towards trans men. You can be the first though! Or you just send that stuff to me, I might post it a month later, but I'll make sure to post it! <3 Here is my star-and-cat themed image collection :)

[tiedupwithabow]

if you support israel, do not touch this blog ❤︎

formerly @airheadfemme, but tumblr hates me and terminated my account, so here we go again!

my wonderful friend and mutual @gothcoffins and i have a very lovely discord server if anyone would like to join (must be a 20+ year old femme4butch lesbian)!

about me:

~ 22 years old

~ white and transmisogyny exempt

~ ofos nonbinary high femme lesbian

~ very happily taken by @mistlestonebutch ❤︎

~ submissive to a fault, but experimenting more with my dominant side

~ fat, disabled, chronically ill, and neurodivergent (adhd, autistic, bipolar)

~ i use they/them pronouns with everyone except my butch, who i prefer to refer to me using she/her pronouns

~ i love getting asks, and i will do my best to answer all of them in a timely manner, but i sometimes struggle with severe brain fog and it can make typing well written responses very hard. if you see me active on here, but i haven't answered your ask yet, that's probably why!

~ due to the aforementioned brain fog, i often make a lot of original posts on days when i'm feeling well, and they end up either queued or in my drafts until i decide to post them.

dni, tags, kinks, limits, and more under the cut

do not interact if you are:

~ a minor

~ a man (cis or trans)

~ an ed or feeder blog

~ a defender of "bisexual lesbians" or anything similar

~ someone who believes that nonlesbians can use the terms dyke, butch, or femme

~ someone who believes that nonblack nonlesbians can use the terms stud, fish, and stem(me)

~ a defender of harmful "kinks" such as ag*play/ddlg, r*pe (anything beyond dubious consent), inc*st, "orientation play"/corrective r*pe, r*ce play, etc

~ a racist, zionist (two staters included), transmisogynist (this includes terfs, ppl who believe in "transandrophobia", ppl who think trans men can be lesbians, etc), fatphobic person, or any other sort of bigot that i may have forgotten to put

my tags:

#the airhead speaks - my original posts

#my good butch ❤︎ - posts (including rbs) about domming

#taking notes - posts i want to look at again later

#🛡️- posts that remind me of my butch (bc they're my knight and i'm their princess ❤︎)

#beloved femmes ❤︎ - typically just pictures of femmes that i think are gorgeous (all compliments are platonic)

#my pics - idk p self explanatory but the few times i post pictures they'll be here

#ask me things! - ask games and prompts

#answered things - all of my answered asks

kinks:

~ praise

~ bondage

~ choking

~ breeding

~ blasphemy

~ corruption

~ possession

~ degradation

~ hair pulling

~ play fighting

~ objectification

~ overstimulation

~ regency/royalty

~ dubious consent

~ butch patriarchy

~ light impact play

~ exhibitionism (in theory)

~ dumbification/bimboification

~ intox (i rarely post ab it though)

~ free use (in an explicitly consensual way)

~ calling my butch daddy (as a title, mostly in the context of breeding)

~ roleplay (usually experienced dyke + innocent church girl, cocky tutor + airhead tutee, "bad boy"/loner butch + cheerleader, boss + maid, and other/potentially more embarrassing stuff)

limits:

~ anal

~ scat, blood, piss, etc

~ the harmful "kinks" referenced in my dni

if you add anything to my post that makes me uncomfortable (including mentioning one of my limits* in the tags), i will instantly block you.

*this excludes an*l as i'm aware that many people can only experience penetration anally, but please use as vague of phrasing as possible (ex: using the term "hole" rather than anything more descriptive)

[tiedupwithabow]

if you support israel, do not touch this blog

formerly @airheadfemme, but tumblr hates me and terminated my account, so here we go again!

my wonderful friend and mutual @gothcoffins and i have a very lovely discord server if anyone would like to join (must be a 20+ year old femme4butch lesbian)!

about me:

~ 22 years old

~ white and transmisogyny exempt

~ ofos nonbinary high femme lesbian

~ very taken with @butcholantern ❤︎

~ submissive to a fault, but experimenting with my dominant side

~ fat, disabled, chronically ill, and neurodivergent (adhd, autism, bipolar)

~ i use they/them pronouns with everyone except my butch, who i prefer to refer to me using she/her pronouns

dni, tags, kinks, limits, and more under the cut

do not interact if you are:

~ a minor

~ a man (cis or trans)

~ an ed or feeder blog

~ a defender of "bisexual lesbians" or anything similar

~ someone who believes that nonlesbians can use the terms dyke, butch, or femme

~ someone who believes that nonblack nonlesbians can use the terms stud, fish, and stem(me)

~ a defender of harmful "kinks" such as ag*play/ddlg, r*pe (anything beyond dubious consent), inc*st, "orientation play"/corrective r*pe, r*ce play, etc

~ a racist, zionist (two staters included), transmisogynist (this includes terfs, ppl who believe in "transandrophobia", ppl who think trans men can be lesbians, etc), fatphobic person, or any other sort of bigot that i may have forgotten to put

my tags:

#the airhead speaks - my original posts

#my good butch ❤︎ - posts (including rbs) about domming

#taking notes - posts i want to look at again later

#🛡️- posts that remind me of my butch or that were rb'd from my butch will be tagged (bc they're my knight and i'm their princess ❤︎)

#beloved femmes ❤︎ - typically just pictures of femmes that i think are gorgeous (all compliments are platonic)

#my pics - idk p self explanatory but the few times i post pictures they'll be here haha

#ask me things! - ask games and prompts

#answered things - answered asks

kinks:

~ praise

~ bondage

~ choking

~ breeding

~ blasphemy

~ corruption

~ possession

~ degradation

~ hair pulling

~ play fighting

~ objectification

~ overstimulation

~ regency/royalty

~ dubious consent

~ butch patriarchy

~ light impact play

~ voyeurism (in theory)

~ dumbification/bimboification

~ free use (in an explicitly consensual way) ~ calling my butch daddy (as a title, mostly in the context of breeding) ~ roleplay (usually experienced dyke + innocent church girl, cocky tutor + airhead tutee, "bad boy"/loner butch + cheerleader, boss + maid, and other/potentially more embarrassing stuff"

limits:

~ anal

~ scat, blood, piss, etc

~ the harmful "kinks" referenced in my dni

if you add anything to my post that makes me uncomfortable (including mentioning one of my limits* in the tags), i will instantly block you ❤︎

*this excludes anal as i'm aware that many people can only experience penetration anally, but please use as vague of phrasing as possible (ex: using the term "hole" rather than anything more descriptive)

[tiedupwithabow]

if you support israel, do not touch this blog ❤︎

formerly @airheadfemme, but tumblr hates me and terminated my account, so here we go again!

my wonderful friend and mutual @gothcoffins and i have a very lovely discord server if anyone would like to join (must be a 20+ year old femme4butch lesbian)

about me:

~ 22 years old

~ white and transmisogyny exempt

~ ofos nonbinary high femme lesbian

~ very happily taken by @poembutch ❤︎

~ submissive to a fault, but experimenting more with my dominant side

~ fat, disabled, chronically ill, and neurodivergent (adhd, autistic, bipolar)

~ i use they/them pronouns with everyone except my butch, who i prefer to refer to me using she/her pronouns

do not interact if you are:

~ a minor

~ a man (cis or trans)

~ an ed or feeder blog

~ a defender of "bisexual lesbians" or anything similar

~ someone who believes that nonlesbians can use the terms dyke, butch, or femme

~ someone who believes that nonblack nonlesbians can use the terms stud and stem(me)

~ a defender of harmful "kinks" such as ag*play/ddlg, r*pe (anything beyond dubious consent), inc*st, "orientation play"/corrective r*pe, r*ce play, etc

~ a racist, zionist (two staters included), transmisogynist (this includes terfs, ppl who believe in "transandrophobia", ppl who think trans men can be lesbians, etc), fatphobic person, or any other sort of bigot that i may have forgotten to put

tags:

#the airhead speaks - my original posts

#my good butch ❤︎ - posts (including rbs) about domming

#taking notes - posts i want to look at again later

#🛡️- posts that remind me of my butch or that were rb'd from my butch will be tagged (bc they're my knight and i'm their princess hehe ❤︎)

#beloved femmes ❤︎ - typically just selfies of femmes that i think are gorgeous (all compliments are platonic)

#my pics - idk p self explanatory but the few times i post pictures they'll be here haha

#ask me things! - ask games and prompts

#answered things - all of my answered asks

kinks:

~ praise

~ choking

~ breeding

~ bondage

~ corruption

~ blasphemy

~ hair pulling

~ possession

~ degradation

~ play fighting

~ objectification

~ overstimulation

~ regency/royalty

~ dubious consent

~ butch patriarchy

~ light impact play

~ exhibitionism (in theory)

~ dumbification/bimboification

~ intox (i rarely post ab it though)

~ free use (in an explicitly consensual way)

~ calling my butch daddy (as a title, mostly in the context of breeding)

~ roleplay (usually experienced dyke + innocent church girl, cocky tutor + airhead tutee, "bad boy"/loner butch + cheerleader, boss + maid, and other/potentially more embarrassing stuff)

limits:

~ anal

~ scat, blood, piss, etc

~ the harmful "kinks" referenced in my dni

if you add anything to my post that makes me uncomfortable (including mentioning one of my limits* in the tags), i will instantly block you.

*this excludes anal as i'm aware that many people can only experience penetration anally, but please use as vague of phrasing as possible (ex: using the term "hole" rather than anything more descriptive)