#there's juuuust a bit of stomach and hip showing...

[the-nothing-maker]

I wouldn't keep talking if I were you.

(a huge thanks to @isantheon for their help with the lace sleeves !! Go look at their own Jarlaxle cosplays, they're incredible !)

[plaindangan]

Junko, how about you show mukuro how sexy a soldier can be~? (I’ll provide the pic~)

(A late story to go alongside this amazing work from @cowedeacumootsu)

"Aren't you glad to see your dear sister, Little Miss Disappointment?~"

"I-I mean...y-yes? It's just..."

"Juuuust...what?~"

"...Looking a bit 'underdressed' for this location..."

When Mukuro received word that her sister would be visiting during one of her operations in the desert, admittedly, panicked was an understatement. This would be the first time (that Mukuro was aware of) that Junko was coming to visit her...and frankly given how volatile Junko was, the possibility of her doing something drastic while her was not very good for Mukuro's nerves.

Yet, as she pondered over what Junko had planned for to disrupt her operations here, Mukuro seemed to have forgotten about one thing that Junko seemed to take pride in more when not plotting for her next bid of despair: how to humiliate Mukuro!~ And what better way to give her a nice hit in the self-esteem department than by flaunting off what she had and her sister lacked!~

Under the noon sun, Junko flashed her ever confident smile to not only Mukuro, but even to her fellow comrades that stood side by side with her. All greeting the fashionista at the gate to their own compound. Though a smile wasn't the only thing she was flashing.

To be blunt, the only that thing that prevented Junko's from essentially being topless was a small camo shirt that was literally holding on by the smallest of knots. Aside from that, heck even with it, Junko exposed to the world her tight stomach and and her own sets of milkers that could put even a well endowed bimbo to shame! Didn't help that she just had to add a tie right in-between her soft knockers to really put emphasis on them!~

Though it wouldn't be Junko if she just ended it like that. No, to match her top, she was also wearing the shortest camo skirt that she could fine (...or could it be a certain cosplayer helped make it?) Either way, it had her her plump thighs out for the world to see. God help anyone who would be able to get a glimpse under there since the wind seemed to have taken the Enoshima Route in only giving enough breeze to tingle their imaginations but never going all the way in showing a juicy ass and what was probably barely covering it!~

Knowing damn well just how much she was stealing the show at the moment, Junko smirked and saunted up to Mukuro hands on her hips. "Heeeey, don't give me that 'underdressed' crap!~ I'm just trying to give these studs here a little visual treat!~ After all, I doubt anyone can get off with you all covered up like that!" she said, pointing at Mukuro's uniform. When compared to her bulky, unappealing uniforms...it was clear who would have stood out more for the 'right reasons'. Blushing from embarrassment, and from seeing her co-workers still gawk in utter bliss at Junko, Mukuro sighed and gestured towards the entrance.

"I...assume you want a tour?" she asked and, for a split second, that dangerous glint in Junko's eyes returned.

"Weeeell, you could say that! Let's go!~" But, as quick as it came, it went back to her faux pleasant grin. Sauntering ahead of them, Junko swayed her hips to really give the guards next to Mukuro a show. Practically hypnotizing them as they looked eager to possibly 'unwind' with her tonight!~ Though for Mukuro this was just the start of a very, very, very, rough day.

[magioftheseas]

You're The Woooorst~!

Summary: Even worse was that he got violently ill in front of Ouma, of all fucking people. That wasn’t the worst day of his life. That was the worst night of his life. Because, as it turned out, when he woke up, he was still violently ill. And Ouma was, of course, the one to know about it, showing up in his damn room unannounced.

Rating: T

Warnings: Kaito being sick but it’s not too bad. Also lotta cursing.

Notes: Wanted to write a short Oumota fic, thought that “taking care of him while sick” would be a simple enough premise. It ended up a little complicated anyway...

***Alternate Ao3 Link***

Commission? Donate?

This was shaping up to be one of the worst days of his life. First, that bastard Shinguuji insisted on telling ghost stories, which freaked him out so much that he had to escape before he got violently ill. Which he did. But even worse was that he got violently ill in front of Ouma, of all fucking people.

That wasn’t the worst day of his life. That was the worst night of his life. Because, as it turned out, when he woke up, he was still violently ill.

“Morn-ing-star-shine!”

And Ouma was, of course, the one to know about it, showing up in his damn room unannounced, with a towel, a bucket full of water, and a puke bag. He must’ve picked the lock because Kaito is damn sure that he locked the door last night.

“Oh, wow, you look great for a sick man on death’s door! Juuuust kidding! Nishishishi! You look awful! Absolutely awful!”

Kaito groaned, throwing an arm over his eyes and wishing for a meteor to crash into his room right now. Preferably where Ouma was standing. Although Ouma skipped closer, cheeky grin splitting his face before he shoved Kaito down onto the bed.

“Didn’t your grandma ever tell you to take it easy when you’re sick?” he sing-songs. “You’re going to fall into your grave before ever taking a single step on the moon! And I’ll be sooooo sad, Momota-chan!”

Kaito growled at him, but he imagined that being in a lame cold sweat and having watery eyes decimated the effect any kind of glare would have.

“Do you really have to be here?” he snapped. “Or does seeing a guy sick get you off?”

“How’d you know?” Ouma asked, batting his eyelashes coyly before gagging. “As if! Even if I were into that, you look like a dog, especially with that goatee of yours.”

“Don’t knock the goatee!” His voice raised to a rasp. “And get the hell out! You’re the last face I need to see right now!”

“Can you even see with eyes that teary?” Ouma retorted, flicking his nose. Before Kaito could attempt to yell, Ouma scrubbed his face with the towel, not even bothering to be gentle, the asshole. “Besides, I’ll have you know I’m here out of the goodness of my heart.”

Kaito would’ve sputtered either way because of the towel rubbing against his mouth.

“That’s the worst lie I’ve ever heard you told.”

“It’s true,” Ouma insisted, soaking the towel and wringing the water out. “We both know you’re such a prideful fucker that no one else is aware of the fact that you’re as delicate as a flower, Momota-chan.”

“Fuck you!”

“And as a result.” Ouma tutted at him. “You planned on just sweating it out alone in your room rather than asking for anyone’s help. Which, truth be told, is so stupid I don’t even know how to comprehend it. Seriously, Momota-chan. That’s so miserable, it brings a tear to the eye! Boo-hoo!”

“So, what?” Kaito demanded. “What kind of guy would I be if I put that kind of burden on everyone?”

Ouma wiped down his face again. He was even rougher than the last time.

“Ow, ow, ow! S-Seriously, knock that shit off!”

“You knock shit off,” Ouma retorted, pulling on his beard and hopping away before Kaito could shove him off. “You’re an even bigger bullshitter than I am if you seriously believe that.”

“Urgh.” Kaito rolled his eyes and covered his head with his pillow. “I don’t have to hear this.”

He still heard Ouma shuffling about. Soaking the towel and wringing out the water again. Ouma letting out an annoyed little huff.

“Hey.” There’s a harsh jab into his side, making him jump. “Does your stomach hurt?”

“Fuck off!”

“Not an answer,” Ouma said, unimpressed. He shrugged. “But given that you’re not bitching about it, I guess it’s fine for now.”

Kaito grumbled and glared at him.

“You’re lucky I feel too much like shit to kick your ass.”

Ouma scoffed, heading into the bathroom and turning on the sink.

“And I was so worried about you!” he exclaimed over the running water, faking a sob. “Oh, Momota-chan, you had me worried sick! I thought you might die again! I can’t go through that a second time, I just can’t!”

Ouma came back, an expression like stone and a cup of water in his hand. Rather robotically, he handed it over.

“Drink. Or else I’ll tell everyone about your little display last night.”

“Are you blackmailing me?!”

Ouma’s lips twitched at the corner.

“I would never.”

Scowling, Kaito snatched the cup and downed the water, glowering down at the other challengingly. Ouma remained stoic.

“What?” Kaito had the childish desire to throw the empty cup at him but refrained. A real man kept his cool, even with annoying shits like Ouma around. “If you got something to say, say it.”

“Don’t you get exhausted talking so much?” Ouma cocked an eyebrow. “You’re sick. You should conserve your energy.”

Kaito snarled at him but bit his tongue.

He’s riling me up on purpose. Well. I’m not gonna fall for it anymore.

To prove his internal point, he turned away with a huff, nose upturned. Ouma’s stare on him remained, feeling almost uncomfortable, but Kaito let that wash over him like water. If he couldn’t deal with weird looks from a brat, what kind of luminary did that make him?

A shameless kid like Ouma wouldn’t get that. He’s too—immature. Naïve.

It wasn’t like Ouma was a bad person. Malicious, mean-spirited, and a fucking asshole, absolutely. But not a bad person. Just a brat who sucked ass at connecting with other people.

Kaito wasn’t that stupid. He knew that Ouma was here right now because he was worried. It was more than irritating—the reason why he kept his weird illness a secret was because he didn’t want people to worry, but Ouma was the kind of kid all the more excited when told no. All about butting his head where it didn’t belong, even when it resulted in burdens that no one should have to carry.

Ouma’s existence was so exhausting that Kaito didn’t understand how the kid could have so much energy despite living the way he did. Seriously.

Maybe that’s admirable in its own way?

He wasn’t sure, but he was tired. And dizzy. And nursing a headache. Oh, that was probably the sickness again. Great. Fucking great.

Kaito fell back with a sigh, crumbling the cup in his hand. The loud crackling of plastic just felt like mockery. It made his headache even worse.

“Urgh... This sucks... It sucks so bad.”

Ouma just takes the broken cup from him, probably to toss. How responsible. Too bad Kaito’s eyes were so watery that it was difficult to see now. Ouma just looked like a blob of purple of white. Kinda funny if not for the fact that his eyes stung, leaving him cursing as he furtively tried wiping them off.

The wet washcloth is pressed against his face again, but this time it’s cold, and before Kaito can protest, it’s thrown over his eyes.

“They were getting so swollen they looked fit to burst,” Ouma said, remarkably cool with even a calm click of the tongue. “Not a lie. If your eyes did burst into bits, that would be pretty horrifying.”

“Horrifying?” Kaito echoed before snorting. “It’d be a tragedy. I’d never be able to see the stars again if that happened. Everything would just be dark forever.”

“A nightmare for a luminary,” Ouma murmured. He flicked Kaito’s nose, making him gripe and flail at nothing but the air. “Did you know, Momota-chan? You’re so dim-witted that your vision already is super dark.”

“Oi! That’s uncalled for and untrue!” Momota does push himself up. It causes a bit of a rush that nearly knocks himself senseless, but he manages to keep his body upright as he lunges for that splotch of white. He ends up tumbling out of the bed, hitting the ground harshly and with nothing in his grasp. “Urgh... Ow...”

“See?” Ouma asks airily. “You’re so stuuuuupid, Momota-chan.”

Momota lets out a pained groan, but Ouma’s standing in front of him. Ouma, who grabs the back of his shirt collar. He hears the threads protest and tear and Ouma yanks.

“Dense, dumb, dull,” Ouma scoffs and drops him. He hadn’t been able to lift him much, so it didn’t hurt, but it was still irritating. “I swear. It’s sickening. Get back into bed, idiot. Unless you want to die here? If you do, don’t worry. I’ll lie to the others and say that I killed you. Spare you the embarrassment. Of course...” There’s a grin in his voice, but the laugher afterward... “Saihara-chan’s still gonna figure it out. Nishishishi.”

It doesn’t sound joyful at all.

Ouma’s really just that annoyed with him.

That’s a real joke if Kaito’s ever thought of one, so his chuckle is a lot more sincere. He tastes blood, and it’s still funny.

“What?” Ouma sounds real unimpressed now. “Have you lost your mind?”

He snorts. “Everything’s, uh, spinning a lot. Spiraling. Like satellites around masses.”

“Come on.” Ouma grabs him properly. “Get back to bed before you spiral out of control.”

“Hahah...” He does manage to pull himself to his feet with Ouma’s help, even as he sways a little. “So no-nonsense. You’re sounding less like your usual shitty self, Ouma.”

“Actually, I’m nobody. Nobody you know. Nobody you care about. Nobody at all.”

“Nobody, huh? Then...it’s fine.”

When he falls back into bed, his fingers curl tightly into Ouma’s ragged white shirt and he digs in. Ouma gasps sharply, falling with him. Another thud. Kaito’s head hurts, and when he comes to, he feels Ouma’s arm close to his scalp, Ouma’s knee by his hip, and Ouma’s harsh exhale of breath.

“...what the hell is this? What are you playing at, Momota-chan?”

He can’t answer when it hurts too much to think.

“You’re awful. Just the worst. The absolute worst.” And yet, Ouma does lean in. That liar presses his open mouth to Kaito’s cheek, lips pursing damply against his skin before murmuring into his ear. “You’re also delirious.”

At that point, Kaito just didn’t want to think so he let his eyes fall.

“This is the worst,” he heard Ouma lament just before he fell completely and utterly out of it.

He wakes up later in an empty room, head a bit clearer. He blinks once at the ceiling. Twice. There’s a wet washcloth folded upon his forehead. It’s long since gone a bit lukewarm.

Wait. What the actual hell was that?

[limenysnocket]

Blurred Stars and Even Blurrier Nights

Taika Waititi x Reader

Summary: After a late night out, Taika and (Y/N) wake up next to each other the next morning, in their undergarments. Despite being close friends, this predicament leads to an untimely confession.

Request: ////

Warnings: possible smut, a bit of a praise kink, usage of alcohol, soft sex and language.

Word count: 3,076

Author's note: This is going to be extremely fluffy too, unlike my last one. But, please forgive me if this turns out awful, like what usually happens.

I also take requests, so please, give them. Hand them over.

Also, this is only section 1 of the story. I'm thinking about making a part two, if this all goes well.

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Section 1: The Morning Of

You took a deep breath, the heady scent of familiar cologne filling your nose and the soft heat of the morning sun filled your body with warmth, along with the sheets, and surprisingly, another warm body.

'Great,' you thought to yourself, 'One more one night stand to add to the list.'

You felt them shift against your back, their somewhat hairy chest sending tingles rippling down your skin like a stone tossed in a pond. You needed to see them. If they felt mature enough, then maybe they would be mature enough to not complain when they findd you gone when they wake up. You kept your hopes high as you attempted to turn around in their arms without waking them. When you had completely shifted again, onto your other side, you had to bite back a gasp of shock and there was mental restraints strapping you down from shooting away from the bed.

Wonder why the cologne on the pillow smelled so familiar? Now you know why. It was Taika's, one of your closest friends and long time crushes. You were in Taika's room, in Taika's bed, in Taika's arms.

His mustache was ruffled, hair disheveled and there were remnants of the dark bags beneath his eyes. It was very much apparent to you that he was wearing nothing but his boxers which you were very curious to find out the color of.

You couldn't leave his arms, 'less you wanted to wake him, which you kinda did. Your stomach growled, and you were only in your undergarments as well. It was a nice set, and you notice it hadn't been torn, but no matter how nice you looked in a set of underwear, this was serious!

It seemed obvious that nothing happened between you and Taika the night before, but the lipstick stains on his neck only made things seep in even deeper within your stomach. God, the night before. The two of you and possibly Jemaine went out together and all of you got shitfaced until your hangovers kicked in in the middle of all the muddled, drunken mess. It was even a headache to think about what happened. How you ended up here, you didn't want to know right now.

"God fucking damn it..." you whisper to yourself, squeezing your eyes shut too quickly to notice the slight twitch of Taika's mustache and that twitch flew to his lips. His face was slowly starting up and the last thing to power up was his beautiful, deep brown eyes. "Good morning to you too, gorgeous."

Your eyes flew open. He was grinning as wide as the Cheshire cat and his eyes seemed to scan the shock on your face. "Wild night last night, huh?" He poked fun, pulling his arm back slightly so his hand could rest on your naked side. "You were unhinged last night, baby."

Your cheeks flushed brightly and you smacked his chest, "Taika, you know we never did anything like that last night!" You folded your arms across your chest and you scooted away from him while slapping the hand off your waist. You flipped back over onto your other side and tried to avoid talking to him, but he was persistent.

"I beg to differ," He laughed, wrapping both of his arms around your waist and nuzzling his nose against the back of your neck. This set your entire body ablaze but the heat mainly scrambled between your legs. "You were all over me last night, (Y/N). It was flattering," he laughed again, now brushing his lips against the back of your neck, "and during the time you were grinding that cute bum of yours on my crotch, you kind of told me something." Your eyes widened. Oh God, he remembered that? It was a mistake for you to remember it, and it was an even bigger one for him to remember it too! Your confession.

"You told me that you just so happened to love me, and that you wanted me in your pants," he snickered. "Of course, you might remember us getting back here to my home, sucking faces and tearing our clothes off as we went-- your shirt is on the ceiling fan downstairs by the way-- but, I just couldn't do you. Not yet. I wanted our first time to be sober, so you could feel everything and remember what it felt like instead of just dealing with sore hips in the morning without knowing how they got like that." So he wanted this? He planned this, the need to get you under him?

His nose went back up into your hair and you felt him inhale deeply, "And I want to feel myself inside you and memorize that feeling without it all being fuzzy." He chuckled softly, gently pressing his lips against the back of your head.

You drew in a deep, shaky breath. Just the sound of his rumbly voice had you weak at the knees and the heat between your legs was more intense than ever. "I'm gonna go find my clothes," you made up the excuse and pushed away from him before his hands could crawl any more seductively over your body. He let out an exasperated sigh, more of a groan really, as you got up and started searching for your clothes. He propped himself on his elbows while you searched around the room, letting his eyes shamelessly roll over your body.

Not wanting to deal with the tension any more, you quickly hid yourself in one of his many white shirts and started downstairs. Your pants were along the railing of the stairs, softly drifting every once in awhile like a flag in the wind. Of course, he was right whenever he had said that your shirt was on the ceiling fan. You had to stand on his expensive coffee table to get it, getting up on your tippy toes too where you were juuuust able to reach.

You didn't have the mind to even put your clothes on as you went. You wanted to find them all first, even if you knew in the back of your brain, Taika was going to start following you around eventually. There was a deep feeling in your heart that wanted him to follow you.

Eventually, all your late night clubbing clothes were gathered up in one pile and you slowly peeled Taika's white shirt from your body, not knowing or noticing the soft steps on the stairs. They stopped about halfway, yet you still didn't notice. He was watching you with a longing look, lip between his teeth and his eyes going wherever they pleased. He waited until you were finished dressing before he moved like he didn't just stand in the same spot for the past few minutes to watch all of your beautiful skin get covered up by clothing.

"Want me to make you breakfast?" He broke the silence and startled your wits out of you. Oh, how easy would it have been to just say that you could pick up something from a nearby coffee shop on your way back home, but your stomach growled, and who knew how fast a cab was going to get there at this time in the morning. So you nodded begrudgingly. His boxers were navy blue, by the way. You tried not to make it obvious that you were staring, but you managed to catch too many glimpses of them between his fluffy, white robe.

Taika grinned widely as he went to the kitchen, knowing that you were following closely behind him.

You sat down at island and tapped your fingers against the counter. You were nervous. Were you supposed to act this awkward? I mean, you had never done something so promiscuous with Taika before, not even close... Well, maybe a few times there had been close calls as to you two getting a bit touchy, or whispering dirty things into each other's ear on set whenever someone has a line that's particularly lewd. It happened multiple times on Hunt for the Wilderpeople. Strangely enough, he would do it more than you, and he had a habit of keeping you close to his side the same time.

Had he always felt this way about you? Had there always been this desire to get you beneath him or kiss you like he did last night? You told him that you loved him, that you had felt that way... You don't remember if he said I love you back.

Before you know it, the clink of a plate hitting the surface before you and the aroma of amazing food wafted upwards into your face. "Bacon will be ready in a few moments. I made a bunch and I didn't know how many pieces you want, so I'll let you grab all that you need," he winked. It made you blush a little, you're embarrassed to admit.

What he had given you looked like a little droplet of heaven before you. Fired eggs and French toast. You know they are pretty easy to make, but God damn, did it smell amazing. You took your knife and fork and cut up your food into pieces, like a civilized being. You weren't in the mood to embarrass yourself in front of Taika possibly more than twice within the matter of just 24 hours. Eventually the sizzle of the grill had stopped and Taika was pushing dishes into the sink for a brief washing much later. He set himself up across from you, leaning over the counter slightly while he set down the massive plate full of bacon between the two of you.

He picked up a piece of bacon and started munching like nothing was wrong, like this was a normal day of him being half naked in front of you for the first time since you accidentally walked in on his audition many years ago for the New Zealand show called "The Strip". That was always a pleasant memory, even though he hated it every time you brought it up.

The more the silence grew between you, the more awkward you felt and the more you wanted to say something.

You wanted to tell him that you loved him, and you have loved him ever since you met him in an odd job both of you shared along the outskirts of Wellington, but most of all, you wanted to ask him if he loved you back. You wanted to know if you really are wasting your time chasing a man who can't be obtained.

It was eating you up, the silence. Oh, fuck it.

"You know, I meant what I said last night," you said, letting your fork drop and hit the plate with a loud simmering crack. He didn't move from his position, his jaw was still shifting up and down as he chewed on his food. He was thinking about what he wanted to say. You saw his chest puff up a little and the Adam's apple on his throat bobbed when he swallowed.

"(Y/N)," he said in his low drawl. He seemed vulnerable now, the powerful presence that he usually had just disappeared from his soul. He set down his fork and placed his hands on the table, standing a little straighter now. He looked up at you, his eyes just so visible through the forest of silky, silver curls on his head. You almost wanted to hate him for each time he looked at you like that. It made your heart throb in the most aching way and your nails sunk into your palms.

"I love you too..."

Those words hit you like a semi-truck and you didn't realize it until your lips crashed against his that you had risen out of your seat and leaned as far as you could over the island. He kissed you back after a few moments of shock, and raised his right hand to gently push it into your hair.

You felt the familiar feeling of his mustache along your upper lip, and heard the scraping of plates on the counter. He had moved all of your plates away then gently latched his hands onto your waist. He tugged you into the island and you got the hint, briefly parting from his lips and hopping onto the counter. He did the same, doing his best to avoid the hanging light that dangled dangerously close to both of your heads. He laid you down on your back, placed himself between your legs, and leaned down to kiss you again, this time with more want and passion. He was gentle with you and it felt incredibly sweet.

Taika took things slow, gently pushing his hand up your shirt to rest his hand on your stomach and he rubbed soft circles. You shuddered beneath his touch, but, at the same time, melted for him. Once he felt like his intentions with you were shown enough, he slid your entire shirt off of your body to expose one half of the lovely undergarment set you had worn. With that gone, he dropped his robe and carelessly tossed it on the floor. You both stayed like this, making out and slowly shedding you of your clothes. It was beautiful, amazing and passionate.

Taika parted with your lips to catch a breath, once you were completely undressed, left how you were when you woke up this morning. "You're sure you want to do this?" He whispered deeply in your ear. You let out a gentle moan, "Please."

He swallowed thickly, then nodded. He curled a finger around the hem of your underwear, gently gliding it down your thighs, then your ankles and tossed it onto the ground. He went for your bra and your back arched so he could have better access to the clip on the back. Once he knew how to do it, after feeling around it for a bit, he got it off and just stared for a long while. A smirk crept up on his lips after a few breathless moments. One of his hands placed itself on your chest, just beneath your throat, then it started sliding down to where it was beneath both of your breasts. He rubbed that space with tender passion and watched your face contort with need. He leaned down again so his hot breath beat against your ear, "How long have you been wanting this?"

You were almost to out of breath to answer him. The way he had you right now just knocked the breath out of you with one, simple glance. "A-a long time...~," you breathed out, rolling your hips up and bucking softly into the very apparent bulge in his boxers. His hand crept down between your legs and started to rub your now slick folds. "Mm, that answer isn't good enough, (Y/N)~," he growled, his hand now teasing your sensitive folds.

You moaned out his name into the air as he pinched and massaged your clit. "Tell me how long, (Y/N)," he whispered again, his teeth scraping against the lobe of your ear.

"Ever since I walked in on your audition~," you let escape from your mouth. You didn't have to describe which audition it was, because he already knew. You talked about it quite a bit, just to mess with him or compare where he was then and where he was now during drunk, emotional ramblings, usually with Jemaine around.

"Oh? Did the sight of me shirtless turn you on~?" He purred again, now dragging his boxers down his thighs while he watched you squirm beneath him. "Yes~," you responded, letting out groans of desperate need. He was smirking as he pulled away from your ear and he wrapped a finger around your chin while the other went to his length. He gently slipped into you, keeping your face aimed towards him so he could see every single scrunch of your face.

"You're so beautiful~," he purred started to slowly thrust, keeping it soft and slow. "You like this, don't you, baby~?"

All you could give to him was nods and moans in turn to his questions. He started getting faster with his motions the tighter he felt you clamp around him. His curls were sticking to his forehead and he let out soft groans and sighs, his hips rolling and the wet slaps of skin on skin sent the both of you higher than the moon. He buried his nose in the crook of your neck and he kissed at your sensitive skin, occasionally scraping his teeth against it too. "You're mine now, understand~?" He growled and panted against your skin. You nodded again, all the emotions hitting you at once. He claimed you and now you were his.

"Taika, I'm close~," you managed to moan out, your back arching upwards and your hands clawing at the counter beneath you. "Go for it, babe~. I wanna hear everything~," he purred, biting his lip. You could feel him coming closer to the end as well. He knew how to handle himself well down there, but his facial expressions said otherwise, every time he would lift up and kiss you roughly.

He dropped his hands down to your hips and held on tightly, he wanted this, he needed this and you needed this too.

"Fuck-- Taika~!!" You screamed out and bucked your hips while you came. Taika's thrusts became rough yet shallow, random ruts in attempt to gain pleasure. His nails dug into your hips and made you since softly. Their intense grip only released whenever he did. Luckily, he pulled out and poured it all onto your stomach.

He was panting heavily, his eyes squeezed shut, and his hands now softly massaging your hips, the best they could at least. Sweat dripped down his temple and your chest rose and fell immensely. He lifted himself off of you and sat up, completely forgetting about the dangling light. He remembered whenever it collided with the back of his head.

Both of you were in shock for a minute before smiles cocked up on the corners of your mouths. Taika was the first to break and let out a burst of laughter, you were hot on his heels, as if you both didn't have intimacy less than a few minutes ago.

Well... you guessed you could get used to doing something like this.

[cherry-holland]

“Is there a reason you’re naked in my bed?” with Haz, please! 💕

Ooo Mel what a good choice 👀 this one is gonna be a little bit more on-brand with the season because of a concept I’ve been meaning to do, so your ask came in at juuuust the right time 😏

Warning: it gets quite steamy, so you under-agers beware!!!!

Getting away from the stress of real life, from the real world, was something you and Harrison frequently discussed. He knew you were swamped at work, with your boss breathing down your neck about deadlines being met and that one nasty co-worker who was always trying to undermine you. You knew that Harrison was starting to grow antsy on set of his new show, just itching for a change of pace from the fast-moving set life. You had no idea what that looked like, but it seemed like Harrison had a plan up his sleeve.

He had surprised you at work and whisked you away, saying he had “a little something” planned for you. You were so stunned to see him there, considering he wasn’t to be back until the week of Christmas. You poked and prodded Harrison for details as to where you were going, but nothing you were thinking of compared to that moment when Harrison rolled up to this quaint, cozy cabin in the middle of the woods, fresh blankets of snow surrounding the wooden home.

As soon as you entered in the cabin last night, you two got right to business. Clothes strewn across the room, the crackling fireplace (that was pre-lit by Harrison), the sound of your breathy moans, and skin slapping against each other filling up the room as the two of you picked up where you left off right before Harrison left for shooting. Encompassing your love with the passion and desire you both had been missing - hell, that you both were craving.

You smiled to yourself at the thought as you finished brewing the hazelnut-flavored coffee Harrison and you liked, the rich, warm scent of the hazelnut and the strong, earthiness from the coffee itself filling the room. The morning light was brighter than normal, thanks to the fresh snowfall from earlier that morning. You sighed in contentment, looking out into the small window that sat perfectly atop of the farmhouse-style sink. You knew Harrison was great at surprises, but this definitely took the cake for “best surprise”. The peace, the tranquility of the entire cabin was exactly what the two of you needed to get your mind off of things, and just enjoying each other’s presence.

You brought your mug and Harrison’s into the master bedroom, Harrison’s flannel just barely grazing the top of your thighs as you walked into the large room. You paused at the doorway to look at your boyfriend, deep in slumber. His dark blonde hair was twisted every which way and looked softer than ever. He was laying on his stomach, so his bare back was facing you, and you could faintly see purple marks littered throughout his shoulder blades. His face was turned slightly against the crisp, white pillow, his mouth open just a crack as quiet snores escaped out. He looked so... serene, so calm, that it hurt you to wake him. But, of course, you knew you had to for one reason...

You walked over to his side of the bed as you placed the coffee mugs down, and laid down next to him, your hands running up and down his back, feeling his muscles slowly tense under your touch. He stirred a little bit under your touch, and turned his body around to face you with a slight groan, a sweet smile gracing his lips.

You returned the smile back, hands continuing their movement on his arm. “Well hello, handsome. Is there a reason you’re naked in my bed?”

Your light tone brought out a giggle out of Harrison’s lips, him burying his blushy face into the pillow. “Well, funny story, actually. Met a beautiful girl and one thing led to another...” he trailed off, lifting himself up to be hovering over you.

“Hmm, was she any good?” You joked, wiggling your eyebrows.

“Yeah, I guess,” Harrison chortled, with a slight shrug.

“Hey! I am not bad in bed at all,” you gasped, playfully shoving his arm that was supporting himself.

“No, darling, you are not. Not at fucking all,” Harrison breathed out, bringing his lips down to mould into yours, kissing you passionately.

“Good, because if that were the case, I’d have to prove you wrong, love,” you broke away from the kiss with a devilish smirk growing on your face, bringing your hands up in his hair.

The feeling of your hands tangling in Harrison’s hair caused a low moan to escape from his lips, his hips rolling into yours instinctively. “Then prove me wrong.”

You moaned loudly at the feeling of his hard-on being grounded into your clothed core, which was throbbing with want. It’s going to be a long morning...

[iluvsexyvoltageguys]

Skin Trade - Part 1

Fandom: Be My Princess (Love 365)

Pairing: Prince Keith x Reader

Prince Keith was fuming and it was totally your fault. Liberty’s casino night being held downtown at the newest hotel was supposed to be a night of light-hearted and wholesome charity and instead, you had put on the naughtiest, most revealing lingerie you could find and decided to tease the hell out of Keith.

You just couldn’t help yourself, you just miss him so much when he’s off doing official business. But when you do get him all to yourself on a rare day off, it basically means non-stop orgasms all night long and it’s a bit hard to return to only getting your prince naked once or twice a week.

The built-up frustration meant that when the opportunity to tease the hell out of Keith presented itself, you grabbed it with two hands and got ready to hold on for the ride.

Your dress had a convenient slip up the side for you to show off the garter and knee highs, held up with suspenders, that you were wearing if you hitched your leg up just a bit. It was also just low cut enough that if you leaned over the table to place your bet, Keith could see the beginnings of the delicate lace web that was keeping your breasts in place tonight.

You were hoping that once Keith got a reprieve from his duties he would meet you in an empty room to punish you but you got a little more than you bargained for, seeing as you were currently pressed against the table in a conference room with an angry red mark forming on your ass.

“So, my girl wants to play dirty?” uttered Keith from behind you.

The resounding moan earned you another hard slap as wetness leaked down your thighs. “You think you can just tease me all night and you won’t get punished?” Keith continued, dipping a finger into your core to collect some of your wetness, ghosting over your clit before bringing it to his lips.

“You taste just as good as ever.” He groaned and brought his fingers back to get another taste. “Was that what you were hoping for? Me to eat you out until your cum runs down my face and then we could get back to the gala?” Keith asked in a rough voice, slowly toying with your clit, pulling away every once in a while.

“Please, your highness.” You begged for some permanent contact as you wiggled against the table but received nothing but another slap on the ass.

“Oh no, darling, it’s not going to be that easy.” Keith slips two fingers inside of you to curl at your g-spot and your stomach comes off the table as your back curls. You feel a firm hand press on your back to push you back against the table before collecting your arms and holding them at the small of your back. You test his hold by trying to wiggle your ass back towards him, silently asking for more.

“I don’t think so princess, you’re not getting my cock that easy.” Keith chastises. Your moans push him even more and he slaps your pussy. Your legs start to give out on you and he lifts you further on to the table.

Knowing that the time limit on the two of you being found is running out, he drops to his knees and sucks hickeys onto your legs. You try to push back against him but he slaps your ass and continues to go nowhere near where you want him. Keith slips two fingers into you, pumping rhythmically and biting at his hickeys. Your knees begin to buckle as he brings you right to the brink of an orgasm, your body juuuust starting to seize up around him when he pulls his fingers out, stands up, and starts to rub his hand on your ass to soothe you.

“Come on beautiful, you can hold it,” Prince Keith smirks as he pulls away and lets go of your arms watching as you slump down against the table and try to regain your breath.

He helps you by pulling off your underwear and slipping it into his pocket, giving you one last slap before he flips the skirt of your dress down back over your ass. You slowly move to stand and test how jiggly your legs were. Finding that you can walk you slowly turn to kiss Keith only to have him grip you tightly against himself and he grinds himself against you slowly.

You moan into his mouth and pull back. “Please Keith, please just let me blow you. Anything. Please. I need you,” you beg, reaching for his trousers but Keith just smirks and pulls away, shaking his head.

You pout as he moves toward the door, looking to make sure the coast is clear before crooking a finger towards you to signal you to follow him. You smile and intertwine your hands, following him back to the party.

You re-join the party and split ways. Prince Keith heads back to the other princes and you head to the bar to get another glass of wine. A second plan starts forming as you lift a leg up onto the foot-bar on the bar. You can feel Keith’s annoyed look on you. You know he thought he had satisfied your intentions, at least until he got you in bed, but now he knows better.

You look around to see everyone busy with their own things and then made eye contact with Keith. You kept your eyes on him as you slid your hand up the side of your leg and under your dress, quickly collecting some of your nectar on two fingers. You brought them to your lips and swirled around your mouth, arching an eyebrow at Keith. He grits his teeth and turns back to the casino he’s overseeing but you can see him clench his fists.

After an hour or so more of you teasing Keith from a distance he can finally leave the party. He’s shaken enough hands and raised enough money so he could finally take you home and do all the things he’s been planning for the last couple of hours. To speed up the process, he collects your coats and hands the ticket to the valet before heading back to you.

The hairs start to stand on the back of your neck as he gets close to you, the anger practically rolling off him in waves. He helps you into your coat and is polite to the older couple you were talking to as you say goodbye. You slowly make your way out to the valet stand, saying goodbye to the princes you encounter on the way.

Prince Keith seems to have timed everything perfectly and the car pulls up just as you exit the building. Being a true gentleman he opens the door for you before tipping the valet and heading to the driver’s side. As the car zooms away from the hotel Keith seems to relax slightly but you can tell he’s still mad as his hand comes to rest on your thigh. You shuffle your legs apart a bit, giving him more room and he begins rubbing circles on the inside of your thigh. You sigh as his hand slips further up your leg, starting to dig his short nails in a bit. He slides his hand up, quickly striking your clit before pulling back.

“Just dripping for me, aren’t you princess?” he smirks at how sticky the inside of your thighs are without your underwear to catch your slick.

“Keith, please,” you beg, canting your hips up toward his hand.

“No _____, if you wanted to get off, you shouldn’t have teased me like that.” Keith says, swiping at your clit once again before removing his hand and going back to driving.

You huff at the dismissal but your mood brightens as you notice the gates to the driveway coming up. You say nothing as Keith pulls the car up to the front. The tension builds as you get inside when a servant walks by and Keith’s arm comes around you to press you closer to his front. You can feel the only evidence of how turned on he his against your back, his face remaining implacable. His hands gripped your hips tightly as you tried to push your luck and ground your hips back against him. Luckily the servant was headed in the opposite direction, but there was no reprieve for the moment the servant disappeared around the corner. Keith landed a stinging slap on your ass.

“Think you can just do as you like huh? You try and play me like that and think there aren’t any consequences?” Keith says gripping your hips back against him. You turn down another hallway and he slaps your ass one more time before leading you to his room.

He pauses before opening the door, leaning slightly against the frame and looking back at you. “You’re definitely still up for this right?” he checks, face softening slightly as he looks at you in the glow of the hall lights. “because if you are princess, I’m not sure you’re going to be able to walk tomorrow.”

You nod slowly and smirk in response, leaning over and pushing the door open, walking into the room. You take off your coat, hanging it up quickly before walking further into the room and turning to Keith in the doorway. You reach behind yourself to undo your dress and let it slide to the floor, leaving you only in your knee highs and suspenders but otherwise bare to Keith’s heated gaze.

“Well then…” you say, quirking an eyebrow up at him. “what are you waiting for?”

BMP Masterlist

[thefatedthoughtofyou]

The One Where Sam And Bucky Wake Up Wade-less

“Cold.” Is all Sam hears mumbled into his side as Bucky snuggles closer to him, he moved his fingers against Bucky’s hair.

“Hmm?” Sam hums, still mostly asleep.

“M’cold.” Bucky grumbles again, pressing his face harder into Sam’s skin.

“Mmm?” Sam hummed again, hearing Bucky but not really hearing him.

“My ass is cold.” Bucky growled grumpily into Sam’s side, his fingers brushing over Sam’s ribs as he wrapped his arm around him and pulled him closer. Sam blinked his eyes hard, sleep finally falling away a bit.

“Well where’s your blanket?” He said quietly, rubbing at his eyes with his free hand.

“I didn’t need a blanket, I had a Wade.” Bucky mumbled, his lips moving against Sam’s skin and making him shiver. Sam snorted.

“Then pull him back on top of you.” Sam said, his eyes still closed as he leaned down and kissed the top of his head. Sam heard the sound of Bucky’s hand patting the mattress as he reached out for Wade, then he was groaning into Sam.

“Gone.” Bucky said, then lifted his head up and looked at Sam, Sam smiled down at him. He was looking up at Sam with sad puppy eyes. Sam rolled his eyes and shook his head a little, then moved his finger down Bucky’s nose slowly before pressing hard and making Bucky scrunch his face up and pull back a little, making a little noise in his throat.

“You wanna go find him?” Sam asked, Bucky nodded and waited for Sam to sit up before rolling off the bed. He stood looking around the floor for a minute, turning in a circle.

“Shirt.” He said sadly, looking a little lost. Sam grabbed one of his own shirts and threw it to Bucky. Bucky smiled at him and pulled it over his head.

They took turns in the bathroom and were heading out the bedroom door when they heard the singing. Bucky stopped and side eyed Sam. Sam rolled his eyes and they walked to the kitchen. They rounded the corner and Sam saw Wade, standing at the stove in his underwear, they were covered in little hearts. Sam and Bucky each had a pair just like it, Wade had gotten them for all the three of them.

Sam’s eyes moved off of Wade and realized that the kitchen was full of pancakes. And when he says full, he means full, the counters were covered, chocolate chip ones, blueberry ones, strawberry ones, ones shaped like hearts. Sam wasn’t completely sure that there were plates underneath them, his instincts told him no, simply because it was Wade who was cooking. Wade went into a high note as he belted out “angel of the morning” while swaying back and forth and then flipping a pancake high in the air. Sam turned and looked at Bucky to see him smiling.

Sam loved when he smiled like that, Wade was one of very few people that could make him smile that way, his eyes shining and his lips parting just enough to see his teeth.  Sam could make him smile that way too, but it was always nice to have some else there too, to not be the only one making Bucky happy. Bucky was watching Wade’s back with that smile, then Wade spun around as he danced and apparently he hadn’t heard them because he screamed loudly as the pan in his hand flew through the air. Bucky laughed, his eyes crinkling at the edges.

“Holy shit sticks!” Wade yelled, his hand resting on his chest.

“Umm…how long have you been standing there?” he asked, tilting his head and narrowing his eyes at them.

“Long enough to watch you wiggling your little ass in those heart covered underwear.” Sam said, Wade looked down quickly and then looked back up with a smile.

“Long enough for my ass to be cold because you left us in bed.” Bucky said grumpily. Sam smirked a little, knowing full well that Bucky had just been smiling and laughing. Wade smiled at him.

“I’d be more than happy to warm you back up. You just bring that ass right on over here.” Wade said, giving Bucky his best sultry look and a come hither motion with his finger. Bucky deepened his frown as he looked at Wade, Sam snorted and shook his head. Wade looked to Sam.

“Is he gonna be a grumpy butt all day because of this?” Wade asked, his voice teasing. Sam nodded slowly.

“Most likely. To be fair, nobody likes waking up to a cold ass.” Sam said flatly, crossing his arms. Wade wobbled his head side to side as he looked up to the ceiling.

“Shit, you’re right. I’m sorry!!” he yelled and then jumped over the pan and spilled pancakes on the ground and walked over to Bucky, making grabby hands the whole way there. He pulled Bucky in by the hips and kissed his nose gently.

“I made pancakes for you. It was a gesture of love…but I think it may have gotten out of hand.” Wade said, clearly trying to coax a smile out of Bucky, Bucky wasn’t having it. Sam moved closer, rubbing Bucky’s back and making him shiver.

“See I meant to make some and then bring them back to bed. But I just get so caught up. I fucking love making pancakes. It really shouldn’t be as fun as it is. See so it’s really not my fault. It was…” he paused and gasped for dramatic effect.

“The pancakes.” He said, his voice dropping low like he was afraid the pancakes filling the kitchen would hear him. He pressed closer to Bucky’s front as Sam moved around to press close to his back. Sam saw the corner of Bucky’s mouth twitch and moved his hands down to cover Wade’s on Bucky’s hips.

“Oh! Was that twitch? It was! I saw that, come on gimme a smile! I know you want to I saw it juuuust…here.” Wade said, leaning forward and kissing the corner of Bucky’s mouth quickly before pulling back.

“Plus,” he started, moving his eyes to Sam and then back to Bucky.

“You’ve got Sam warming your ass now. That make you happy? Huh? Little bit happy with Sam on your ass?” Wade prompted, his voice going high. Bucky’s mouth twitched again and then he was smiling. Wade smiled back then ‘booped’ Bucky’s nose and turned away. Bucky made a noise of protest and pulled him back, pulling him close again and snuggling close. Bucky liked to be warm, always.

“He’s so needy.” Wade whispered to Sam over Bucky’s shoulder. Sam nodded and was rewarded by Wade kissing his cheek.

“Gah! And handsy.” Wade said when Bucky grabbed his ass hard and then smiled when Wade looked at him with his mouth dropped open.

“You made us pancakes?” Bucky asked quietly, as Sam snaked his arms around to Bucky’s front and moved his thumb against Bucky’s stomach, Bucky leaned back into him.

“Yes sir I did. For Valentine’s Day! To show my everlasting love for you both. Also I made lots of flavors cuz I didn’t know which ones you liked best. Also also I tried to make heart shaped ones, and some of them look good. But some of them look like what I would like if I fucked a bowl of tapioca pudding and then fell in a blender. And so I’m-“ He cut off when Bucky put his hand over his mouth.

“Two things.” Bucky said, holding up two fingers, Wade’s eyes moved from Bucky’s face to his fingers and then back again before he nodded.

“One, don’t talk about yourself like that, we’ve been through that right?” Bucky asked, Wade rolled his eyes.

“Hey, don’t roll your eyes at him. We have been through it. You’re beautiful.” Sam cut in, Bucky nodded.

“And two. Thank you for the pancakes. They…there are a lot of them.” Bucky said, smiling as he looked around at the counter behind Wade. Bucky lowered his hand and then pulled Wade into a kiss.

“They smell good too.” Sam said, kissing Bucky’s shoulder. Bucky pulled away from Wade and looked at Sam.

“They do yeah, it’s like…I can’t pin the smell down…it’s like, pancakes mixed with something else…” Bucky said slowly, looking like he was trying hard to think of something. Sam sniffed the air dramatically and nodded.

“Hmm… yeah what is that? Do you smell that Wade?” Sam asked, looking at him over Bucky’s shoulder. Wade narrowed his eyes and took a sniff.

“No, all I smell is pancakes and y-“ he froze as Bucky shoved one of the pancakes into his face slowly.

“You two.” Wade finished, hanging his head as the pancake slid off his face and hit the floor with a splat. He bought his hand up to his face and wiped away as many little pieces as he could while Sam and Bucky laughed at him. He looked up at them slowly.

“Really? I slave away all morning to make you breakfast and express my love, and you shove that gesture of love in my face? Really?” he asked, his voice doing that over dramatic thing it does when he’s being…himself. Sam loved it. Sam and Bucky both nodded at him.

“Okay fine. I see how it is. You wanna do this? Let’s fuckin do this.” Wade said, his voice going low as he grabbed a handful of pancakes off the counter behind him. Sam and Bucky laughed and then ducked as Wade let the pancakes fly.

Sam grabbed his own fistful and threw them, they made a nice little thumping noise as they hit Wade in the back of the head. Bucky threw a handful from the other side of the kitchen, hitting Wade in the chest.

“Oh come on!?! You’re teaming up on me!?! How’s that fair!?!” Wade yelled, grabbing the spatula he had shoved into the waistband of his underwear and holding it like sword, smacking at the pancakes flying at him from both sides of the kitchen. He hit one that Bucky threw and it flew back and hit Bucky square in the face.

“Ha!” Wade yelled, pointing at Bucky.

“Aww.” He said seconds later when Bucky threw another one and hit him in the face again. He dropped down low and scrambled behind the island.

“Listen! I just wanted to make food and show my love! I don’t deserve this!” He yelled over the laughter filling the kitchen.

“Okay fine. Truce.” Bucky said, standing up slowly, he and Sam both walking over and then falling onto the floor next to Wade.

“We really done? Can I put down my weapon?” Wade asked, still clutching the spatula. Bucky laughed again and nodded.

“Yeah. We’re done. So…breakfast?” he asked, looking between Sam and Wade. They looked at each other and then back to Bucky.

“Sound good.”

“Fucking finally.”

They said at the same time.

They stood up and Wade grabbed some plates, shoveling pancakes onto each of them and then pouring syrup all over them. They sat on the floor, surrounded in pancakes, both full ones and pieces from the fight. Sam watched Bucky lean into Wade’s side and eye the strawberry pancake he was cutting into pieces and taking huge bites of. Wade raised his eyebrows at Bucky and motioned for him to have some, Bucky stabbed a piece with his fork and took a bite, humming with pleasure as he chewed, then smiling that genuinely happy smile again.

Sam felt his chest fill with warmth as he watched them, eating his own pancakes slowly. They’d somehow fallen into this weird rhythm with each other. And that rhythm had Bucky smiling more often, even starting food fights. And sure, sometimes he’d be grumpy, waking up with a cold ass, but Sam was pretty sure it was worth it.  

[lindafrancois]

How to Touch Your Toes (The 4 Best Stretches to Improve Flexibility)

It’s time to learn how to touch your toes!

What makes me so confident you’ll be able to reach your little piggy wiggies?

Because we teach even the most “inflexible” of folks how to touch their toes in our 1-on-1 Online Coaching Program, and we’ll share with you all our secrets below.

Want to become more flexible? A Nerd Fitness Coach can create a plan to make it happen!

Here’s what we’ll cover in our guide, How to Touch Your Toes:

The benefits of being able to touch your toes.

Why can’t I touch my toes?

Determining your initial flexibility (We all start somewhere)

The 4 best stretches to touch your toes (Improve your flexibility)

How to become more flexible (Next steps)

It’s time to become bendy like Gumby! 

Let’s get started.

The Benefits of Being Able to Touch Your Toes

If you want to increase your flexibility, you’re gonna need to stretch.[1] It’s how you make your muscles elastic and strong.

Why bother though? What’s the big deal about being able to touch your toes?

Here are some of the benefits provided by stretching:

Increase range of motion. If you can move a joint through its full range of motion, you’re gonna have more freedom of movement. Confidently navigating the physical world is a sign of a healthy nerd, which is why flexibility shouldn’t be overlooked. One of the best ways to become more flexible is to stretch.[2] 

Improve posture. If you want to stop slouching so much, regularly stretching may help.[3] Stretching works to improve muscle imbalances, which in turn might help your posture.

Alleviate back pain. If you suffer from back pain, it might be worth starting a stretching routine .[4] The muscles in your back might be tight, restricting your range of motion, which causes pain. Stretching can help loosen up the area, plus strengthen the muscle. This might help prevent future injury. 

Stretching, and the flexibility that comes with it, should not be overlooked when building a workout routine. 

While there are many indicators of good flexibility, one of the most popular is undoubtedly being able to touch your toes.

Afterall, it was so important the President had all American school children perform the “Sit and Reach” test to see if they could grab their feet.[5]

Touching your toes might have been a struggle for you then. It might still be a struggle for you now.

What’s going on?

Why Can’t I Touch My Toes?

If you are unable to touch your toes, it’s most likely because of one of these four major reasons:

1) Shortened/tight posterior chain muscles. Although most people think not being able to touch our toes just means your hamstring muscles are inflexible, in reality our whole system (including the lower back) can play a huge role as well! As Mark Rippetoe explains in this video about the Romanian deadlift, what you may think is a lower back issue is also a hamstring issue (and vice versa):

You see, the posterior chain is an interconnected series of muscles that includes our back muscles, erector spinae (muscles along our spine), lower back muscles, butts, and hamstrings:

Weak mobility points in one place in the system can become debilitating (and often easy to spot) when we do compound movements like the deadlift.

If you’re somebody who sits at a desk all day and struggles to touch your toes, you probably aren’t strengthening or lengthening these��muscles because the chair is doing all of the work for you.

2) You have relatively long legs compared to your torso and arms. People with long legs and short torsos will have a greater challenge than people who have short legs and long torsos and arms.

But fear not, you too can level up and get those toes touched.

3) You have too much body fat. If you are overweight and happen to have a big stomach, it can certainly make touching one’s toes more challenging. Because you already know that diet is 90% of the battle when it comes to weight loss, focus on nutrition to begin losing weight (here are the 5 rules of weight loss to help you begin). This may be a factor in making it easier to touch your toes.

4) You’re not warmed up yet. If you JUST woke up or spent all day in a car, you’re familiar with the rigidity that makes you feel like a steel girder. Your muscles act like rubber bands; the more they are used, the more they are warmed-up, and the further they can stretch. This is why we encourage people to go through a mobility warm-up before exercise!

Let’s put a plan in place to finally touch our toes!

Determining Your Initial Flexibility (We All Start Somewhere)

Before we can implement a strategy to develop more flexibility that allows you to touch your toes, we need to know your starting point.

As Peter Drucker said, “That which gets measured gets managed.” Or in this case, that which gets measured gets more flexible! 

The following comes from our free 5-Day Flexibility Series, which you can sign up for today!

THE “CAN YOU TOUCH YOUR TOES?” TEST

Stand straight with your legs about hip width apart. You want your legs to be straight, but don’t aggressively lock out your knees either (this feels like a “microbend” to a lot of people).

Begin by bending and leaning forward towards the ground with your quads (front of your legs).

Let your body rest naturally, as if you were a ragdoll. Keeping your hands relatively close together, straighten your fingers and begin to stretch down slowly to the ground.

Do this 2-3 times to get warmed up. Try to keep your legs straight by flexing or activating your quads; keep your legs straight, without locking your knees.

Other than the microbend, don’t bend your knees to help you get closer to the ground! I’m watching you. If you’re videotaping yourself on these to track your progress, note that depending on your body (and your hamstrings) your legs may not look 100% straight.

When you are ready, reach towards the ground and hold it for a few seconds. Measure the distance in one of the following ways:

If you aren’t touching the ground, have a friend measure the distance from your tip of your fingers to the ground. If you don’t have a friend with you, place your hands on your legs and note where the tips of your fingers end up.

If you can touch the ground, you’ll want to flatten your hands as much as possible, and record the distance from the top of your head to the ground. As you can stretch further, the top of your head will actually get closer and closer to the ground.

If this seems easy, try hugging your calves and pulling your head in towards your body.

Record your measurement in a document or on a piece of paper (if you’re part of the flexibility challenge, we have a document you can print out), and/or save the photo/video to show how far down you are reaching.

The 4 Best Stretches to Touch Your Toes (Improve Your flexibility)

There are two key factors that will determine whether or not you are successful in gaining the ability to touch your toes as you practice over the next few weeks:

Actively stretching your muscles JUST past the point of comfort. Like strength training by adding 1 rep or a few pounds to an exercise, we want to stretch just beyond the point where we stretched last time so our muscles have to elongate.

Consistent practice and effort! You can’t improve your flexibility by stretching for 5 minutes once a month. You’d be better off stretching for 30 seconds spread out 10 times throughout the month.

That’s right. Studies confirmed that actively focusing on touching your toes for 30 seconds, 3 times per week was enough to lengthen hamstring muscles in 4 weeks. [6]

I‘m sure there’s an inappropriate joke to be made here about 30 seconds of effort, but I’m better than that (I think).

In less time than it takes to update your Facebook status, you could be touching your toes and make Gumby proud.

And I know you have time.

HOW TO TOUCH YOUR TOES (CONSISTENT FLEXIBILITY PRACTICE):

All I’m asking for is 2 minutes. 2 minutes! You can even spread these movements out throughout your day – I like to do them after I work out. After a long day at a desk, after driving, or upon waking up are all good times to work on flexibility!

Through each of the movements below, make sure you are breathing slowly and steadily.

You can follow along with all of the movements below that come from our really fun online course, Nerd Fitness Yoga. It’s essentially Yoga for people that don’t do yoga.

THE 4 BEST STRETCHES TO TOUCH YOUR TOES:

Standing toe touch stretch – 30 seconds

Cat/Camel – 30 seconds (switch positions every 5 seconds)

Star stretch – 30 seconds (as many slow reps as you can)

Moon the sky – 30 seconds (as many slow reps as you can)

1) Standing toe touch stretch: Flex/activate the front of your legs, keep them straight, and bend over at the waist juuuust past the point of discomfort; hold that position for 30 seconds. Repeat this process every other day and hold it for 30 seconds.

2) We can loosen up a tight lower back by doing 30 seconds of moving back and forth every few seconds by doing a “cat” and then a “cow”:

3) You can also do what we call a star stretch to help stretch those legs out! Stand with your legs spread wide, and arms extended (hence the term Star!), and then reach down with one hand to your opposite leg; hold for five seconds, back to start, and repeat with the other leg.

4) Here’s another favorite movement of mine that helps improve my flexibility and mobility: the “Moon the Sky” stretch!

This is a great stretch to mix into your pre-workout warmup to get your legs, butt, and back prepared for work:

Squat down and put your hands under your feet

Slowly move your butt up with your hands remaining under your feet.

Raise your butt and try to straighten your legs

Go a TEENY bit higher each time until you can fully straighten your legs!

For any of the above moves, a good way to check your form would be to record a video of yourself and match it against the videos and gifs here. If they look close, you’re doing great!

If you want to have an expert review your stretches, our coaches can do just that in our snazzy app!

Have a Nerd Fitness Coach help you touch your toes! Learn more here.

How to Become More Flexible (Next Steps)

It’s now time to train to touch your toes!

Test your toe-touching abilities before and after doing the 2-minutes of exercise above, and I bet you’ll notice a difference right away – just wait to see what you can accomplish in a few weeks!

The cool thing about flexibility is that any combination of the stretches above will help you improve your flexibility as long as you consistently work on it a tiny bit every day.

I do mobility work: 

When I wake up

After I work out

Throughout my day (when working at my desk)

At the end of my day for a minute or two before bed

All added up, it’s less than 5 minutes of time, but it’s enough to show me some results!

If you follow our guide above, you’ll be well on your way to increasing your flexibility and touching your toesie wosies.

You just need to start!

Want some help getting going? A little extra push out the door? 

We built three perfect next steps for increasing your flexibility!

#1) Work with a professional Yoda! If you want confidence that you’re following a program that is tailor-made for your busy life, situation, and goals, check out our popular 1-on-1 Coaching Program.

Many of our clients have “increased flexibility” as one of their fitness goals, and they take comfort knowing a certified NF instructor is guiding them there. 

Our coaching program changes lives! Learn more here.

#2) Check out Nerd Fitness Yoga! A yoga program for people who don’t do yoga! Become more flexible in our series that will take you from complete noob to yogi master.

Join NF Yoga! One payment, lifetime access.

#3) Join our amazing free community, the Nerd Fitness Rebellion! Not only is it free to join, but we’ll provide you with loads of free goodies when you sign-up:

Get your Nerd Fitness Starter Kit

The 15 mistakes you don’t want to make.

Full guide to the most effective diet and why it works.

Complete and track your first workout today, no gym required.

That should just about do it for our guide on How to Touch Your Toes.

Now, your turn:

Can you touch your toes?

Does attempting to “sit and reach” bring back horrors from grade school?

Any other tips or tricks for mobility training?

Let us know in the comments!

-Steve

PS: Make sure you check out the rest of our Mobility Training series:

How to Stretch

21 Basic Yoga Poses for Beginners

How to Use a Foam Roller

###

GIF credit: banana, Danny Devito, gumby, patrick.

Photo credit: toe touch, posterior chain, roar, yoga sunset, the adventures of Gumby and R2D2, Storm troopers and Gumby

Footnotes    ( returns to text)

Read, “CURRENT CONCEPTS IN MUSCLE STRETCHING FOR EXERCISE AND REHABILITATION.” Source, PubMed.

This study covers stretching for mobility.

Read, “Effect of an exercise program for posture correction on musculoskeletal pain.” Source, PubMed.

Read, “Stretching and strengthening are key to healing and preventing back pain.” Source, Harvard Health Publishing.

A practice that has now been discontinued.

Read,“The effectiveness of 3 stretching techniques on hamstring flexibility using consistent stretching parameters.” Source, PubMed. Here’s another study that shows 30 seconds of effort results in a more flexible frame!

How to Touch Your Toes (The 4 Best Stretches to Improve Flexibility) published first on https://dietariouspage.tumblr.com/

[lindafrancois]

How to Touch Your Toes (The 4 Best Stretches to Improve Flexibility)

It’s time to learn how to touch your toes!

What makes me so confident you’ll be able to reach your little piggy wiggies?

Because we teach even the most “inflexible” of folks how to touch their toes in our 1-on-1 Online Coaching Program, and we’ll share with you all our secrets below.

Want to become more flexible? A Nerd Fitness Coach can create a plan to make it happen!

Here’s what we’ll cover in our guide, How to Touch Your Toes:

The benefits of being able to touch your toes.

Why can’t I touch my toes?

Determining your initial flexibility (We all start somewhere)

The 4 best stretches to touch your toes (Improve your flexibility)

How to become more flexible (Next steps)

It’s time to become bendy like Gumby! 

Let’s get started.

The Benefits of Being Able to Touch Your Toes

If you want to increase your flexibility, you’re gonna need to stretch.[1] It’s how you make your muscles elastic and strong.

Why bother though? What’s the big deal about being able to touch your toes?

Here are some of the benefits provided by stretching:

Increase range of motion. If you can move a joint through its full range of motion, you’re gonna have more freedom of movement. Confidently navigating the physical world is a sign of a healthy nerd, which is why flexibility shouldn’t be overlooked. One of the best ways to become more flexible is to stretch.[2] 

Improve posture. If you want to stop slouching so much, regularly stretching may help.[3] Stretching works to improve muscle imbalances, which in turn might help your posture.

Alleviate back pain. If you suffer from back pain, it might be worth starting a stretching routine .[4] The muscles in your back might be tight, restricting your range of motion, which causes pain. Stretching can help loosen up the area, plus strengthen the muscle. This might help prevent future injury. 

Stretching, and the flexibility that comes with it, should not be overlooked when building a workout routine. 

While there are many indicators of good flexibility, one of the most popular is undoubtedly being able to touch your toes.

Afterall, it was so important the President had all American school children perform the “Sit and Reach” test to see if they could grab their feet.[5]

Touching your toes might have been a struggle for you then. It might still be a struggle for you now.

What’s going on?

Why Can’t I Touch My Toes?

If you are unable to touch your toes, it’s most likely because of one of these four major reasons:

1) Shortened/tight posterior chain muscles. Although most people think not being able to touch our toes just means your hamstring muscles are inflexible, in reality our whole system (including the lower back) can play a huge role as well! As Mark Rippetoe explains in this video about the Romanian deadlift, what you may think is a lower back issue is also a hamstring issue (and vice versa):

You see, the posterior chain is an interconnected series of muscles that includes our back muscles, erector spinae (muscles along our spine), lower back muscles, butts, and hamstrings:

Weak mobility points in one place in the system can become debilitating (and often easy to spot) when we do compound movements like the deadlift.

If you’re somebody who sits at a desk all day and struggles to touch your toes, you probably aren’t strengthening or lengthening these muscles because the chair is doing all of the work for you.

2) You have relatively long legs compared to your torso and arms. People with long legs and short torsos will have a greater challenge than people who have short legs and long torsos and arms.

But fear not, you too can level up and get those toes touched.

3) You have too much body fat. If you are overweight and happen to have a big stomach, it can certainly make touching one’s toes more challenging. Because you already know that diet is 90% of the battle when it comes to weight loss, focus on nutrition to begin losing weight (here are the 5 rules of weight loss to help you begin). This may be a factor in making it easier to touch your toes.

4) You’re not warmed up yet. If you JUST woke up or spent all day in a car, you’re familiar with the rigidity that makes you feel like a steel girder. Your muscles act like rubber bands; the more they are used, the more they are warmed-up, and the further they can stretch. This is why we encourage people to go through a mobility warm-up before exercise!

Let’s put a plan in place to finally touch our toes!

Determining Your Initial Flexibility (We All Start Somewhere)

Before we can implement a strategy to develop more flexibility that allows you to touch your toes, we need to know your starting point.

As Peter Drucker said, “That which gets measured gets managed.” Or in this case, that which gets measured gets more flexible! 

The following comes from our free 5-Day Flexibility Series, which you can sign up for today!

THE “CAN YOU TOUCH YOUR TOES?” TEST

Stand straight with your legs about hip width apart. You want your legs to be straight, but don’t aggressively lock out your knees either (this feels like a “microbend” to a lot of people).

Begin by bending and leaning forward towards the ground with your quads (front of your legs).

Let your body rest naturally, as if you were a ragdoll. Keeping your hands relatively close together, straighten your fingers and begin to stretch down slowly to the ground.

Do this 2-3 times to get warmed up. Try to keep your legs straight by flexing or activating your quads; keep your legs straight, without locking your knees.

Other than the microbend, don’t bend your knees to help you get closer to the ground! I’m watching you. If you’re videotaping yourself on these to track your progress, note that depending on your body (and your hamstrings) your legs may not look 100% straight.

When you are ready, reach towards the ground and hold it for a few seconds. Measure the distance in one of the following ways:

If you aren’t touching the ground, have a friend measure the distance from your tip of your fingers to the ground. If you don’t have a friend with you, place your hands on your legs and note where the tips of your fingers end up.

If you can touch the ground, you’ll want to flatten your hands as much as possible, and record the distance from the top of your head to the ground. As you can stretch further, the top of your head will actually get closer and closer to the ground.

If this seems easy, try hugging your calves and pulling your head in towards your body.

Record your measurement in a document or on a piece of paper (if you’re part of the flexibility challenge, we have a document you can print out), and/or save the photo/video to show how far down you are reaching.

The 4 Best Stretches to Touch Your Toes (Improve Your flexibility)

There are two key factors that will determine whether or not you are successful in gaining the ability to touch your toes as you practice over the next few weeks:

Actively stretching your muscles JUST past the point of comfort. Like strength training by adding 1 rep or a few pounds to an exercise, we want to stretch just beyond the point where we stretched last time so our muscles have to elongate.

Consistent practice and effort! You can’t improve your flexibility by stretching for 5 minutes once a month. You’d be better off stretching for 30 seconds spread out 10 times throughout the month.

That’s right. Studies confirmed that actively focusing on touching your toes for 30 seconds, 3 times per week was enough to lengthen hamstring muscles in 4 weeks. [6]

I‘m sure there’s an inappropriate joke to be made here about 30 seconds of effort, but I’m better than that (I think).

In less time than it takes to update your Facebook status, you could be touching your toes and make Gumby proud.

And I know you have time.

HOW TO TOUCH YOUR TOES (CONSISTENT FLEXIBILITY PRACTICE):

All I’m asking for is 2 minutes. 2 minutes! You can even spread these movements out throughout your day – I like to do them after I work out. After a long day at a desk, after driving, or upon waking up are all good times to work on flexibility!

Through each of the movements below, make sure you are breathing slowly and steadily.

You can follow along with all of the movements below that come from our really fun online course, Nerd Fitness Yoga. It’s essentially Yoga for people that don’t do yoga.

THE 4 BEST STRETCHES TO TOUCH YOUR TOES:

Standing toe touch stretch – 30 seconds

Cat/Camel – 30 seconds (switch positions every 5 seconds)

Star stretch – 30 seconds (as many slow reps as you can)

Moon the sky – 30 seconds (as many slow reps as you can)

1) Standing toe touch stretch: Flex/activate the front of your legs, keep them straight, and bend over at the waist juuuust past the point of discomfort; hold that position for 30 seconds. Repeat this process every other day and hold it for 30 seconds.

2) We can loosen up a tight lower back by doing 30 seconds of moving back and forth every few seconds by doing a “cat” and then a “cow”:

3) You can also do what we call a star stretch to help stretch those legs out! Stand with your legs spread wide, and arms extended (hence the term Star!), and then reach down with one hand to your opposite leg; hold for five seconds, back to start, and repeat with the other leg.

4) Here’s another favorite movement of mine that helps improve my flexibility and mobility: the “Moon the Sky” stretch!

This is a great stretch to mix into your pre-workout warmup to get your legs, butt, and back prepared for work:

Squat down and put your hands under your feet

Slowly move your butt up with your hands remaining under your feet.

Raise your butt and try to straighten your legs

Go a TEENY bit higher each time until you can fully straighten your legs!

For any of the above moves, a good way to check your form would be to record a video of yourself and match it against the videos and gifs here. If they look close, you’re doing great!

If you want to have an expert review your stretches, our coaches can do just that in our snazzy app!

Have a Nerd Fitness Coach help you touch your toes! Learn more here.

How to Become More Flexible (Next Steps)

It’s now time to train to touch your toes!

Test your toe-touching abilities before and after doing the 2-minutes of exercise above, and I bet you’ll notice a difference right away – just wait to see what you can accomplish in a few weeks!

The cool thing about flexibility is that any combination of the stretches above will help you improve your flexibility as long as you consistently work on it a tiny bit every day.

I do mobility work: 

When I wake up

After I work out

Throughout my day (when working at my desk)

At the end of my day for a minute or two before bed

All added up, it’s less than 5 minutes of time, but it’s enough to show me some results!

If you follow our guide above, you’ll be well on your way to increasing your flexibility and touching your toesie wosies.

You just need to start!

Want some help getting going? A little extra push out the door? 

We built three perfect next steps for increasing your flexibility!

#1) Work with a professional Yoda! If you want confidence that you’re following a program that is tailor-made for your busy life, situation, and goals, check out our popular 1-on-1 Coaching Program.

Many of our clients have “increased flexibility” as one of their fitness goals, and they take comfort knowing a certified NF instructor is guiding them there. 

Our coaching program changes lives! Learn more here.

#2) Check out Nerd Fitness Yoga! A yoga program for people who don’t do yoga! Become more flexible in our series that will take you from complete noob to yogi master.

Join NF Yoga! One payment, lifetime access.

#3) Join our amazing free community, the Nerd Fitness Rebellion! Not only is it free to join, but we’ll provide you with loads of free goodies when you sign-up:

Get your Nerd Fitness Starter Kit

The 15 mistakes you don’t want to make.

Full guide to the most effective diet and why it works.

Complete and track your first workout today, no gym required.

That should just about do it for our guide on How to Touch Your Toes.

Now, your turn:

Can you touch your toes?

Does attempting to “sit and reach” bring back horrors from grade school?

Any other tips or tricks for mobility training?

Let us know in the comments!

-Steve

PS: Make sure you check out the rest of our Mobility Training series:

How to Stretch

21 Basic Yoga Poses for Beginners

How to Use a Foam Roller

###

GIF credit: banana, Danny Devito, gumby, patrick.

Photo credit: toe touch, posterior chain, roar, yoga sunset, the adventures of Gumby and R2D2, Storm troopers and Gumby

Footnotes    ( returns to text)

Read, “CURRENT CONCEPTS IN MUSCLE STRETCHING FOR EXERCISE AND REHABILITATION.” Source, PubMed.

This study covers stretching for mobility.

Read, “Effect of an exercise program for posture correction on musculoskeletal pain.” Source, PubMed.

Read, “Stretching and strengthening are key to healing and preventing back pain.” Source, Harvard Health Publishing.

A practice that has now been discontinued.

Read,“The effectiveness of 3 stretching techniques on hamstring flexibility using consistent stretching parameters.” Source, PubMed. Here’s another study that shows 30 seconds of effort results in a more flexible frame!

How to Touch Your Toes (The 4 Best Stretches to Improve Flexibility) published first on https://dietariouspage.tumblr.com/