#there's definitely women who face worse than me but I'm so exhausted and tired of misogyny and constantly being reminded of it

[apostate-in-an-alcove]

Entering my man hater era.

[fucklifehurts]

Today has been hard. Maybe it's because we've worked a 12 hour day and were surrounded by people until 9pm, maybe its because we ate like shit all day and had no water, maybe its because we miss being able to disassociate and break away from the world.

I'm so fucking tired, and living is hard. Especially with how much absolute bullshit is on my feed. Palestine, Sudan, Congo and those are just the ones I know of. Women having to try to argue our side of the man vs bear bullshit and seeing all of the grotesque things that have happened to women at the hands of awful animals (not the bears). Children being preyed upon, the economy crashing, the fact that we'll literally have to choose between a bag of dicks whose definitely a criminal and an old man with dementia who supports the genocide of a people. Protect 2025 which is going to turn the whole country upside down and roe v wade being overturned, basically turning women into second hand citizens again.

And yet, no bad things have truly happened to me specifically and I'm the one who's exhausted, and the guilt I feel for being so depressed and wanting to be anywhere but here (mainly 6 feet under) when I have a life most people would be jealous of. I have people who love me, and I have to remind myself of that every day in order to keep going, and I'm tired. I want to sleep and never wake up but I know if I don't I'm letting themm down, they are all cheering for me and I feel like I'm throwing it right back in their faces. Like I'm ungrateful of their love. And they just helped me get out of a truly awful place, and I want to go back. I miss the darkness, I miss drowning in dake realities and dissasociating so hard I lose track of hours. I miss smoking till I'm numb and I miss him. And he's the worst thing for me, and here I am crying because I can't let go of someone who treated me worse than dirt.

It hurt even writing that he treated me shitty because of the lovebombing afterward. I hate having to push myself down memory lane to remind myself of the abuse. I hate missing him, wishing I could speak with him . And I hate crying to my therapist, family, and friends over someone they can't stand, so I keep it in. I doom scroll to try to forget but get sucked right back into the shit. Everywhere I look, there's suffering, and no one who already has the power to make a difference seems to care. And here I am crying over a man?! A man who abused me, who brainwashed me, who rewrote my whole existence so I could be the perfect little partner. I'm tired of myself most of all but with so many other things, too.

Fuck I'm so exhausted but I have to keep going. I need to keep going, and it sucks. Hopefully, one day, we'll look back, and this will be a merry to laugh at, at how dramatic I was. Or a memory to smile at and be proud of how far I've come, but right now, I just want to cry and scream. And we're going to feel ok about it.

[giorno-plays-piano]

Vicious

Part VII

Pairing: Steve x reader, Bucky x reader, Thor x reader, Loki x reader, Peter x reader

Warnings: yandere, obsession, stalking, possessiveness, theft, mention of blackmail, all characters are adults.

Words: 1864.

Summary: Transferring to Stark Academy that has only allowed to take in female students last semester, you realize you are just one of three young women among hundreds of students. Your things are constantly being stolen, and soon you begin fearing for your safety.

Part I

Part II

Part III

Part IV

Part V

Part VI

________

You wanted to slap yourself. What the hell was wrong with you today? Why did you tell Peter that?!

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean...” Completely baffled with you behavior, you were deeply ashamed, unable to look the guy in the eyes and wanting nothing but fall into the earth.

“Ah, I got it. It’s Steve, isn’t it?” All of a sudden, Peter let out an irritated sigh, rolling his eyes skywards and rubbing his neck. “Of course, who else would say such nonsense. Blackmail, really? Funny he didn’t call me a stalker or anything.”

“Listen, I didn’t mean it, I’m really-”

“It’s ok.” He closed the locker, slamming its door loudly and making you jump. “It’s not your fault. If I heard that from somebody, I’d be scared too.”

He spent a couple of seconds staring into the wall until he rubbed his neck again tiredly and huffed. It took him less than a minute to regain his composure, and you heard him murmuring, “What a freak.”

He didn't return to the corridor, heading to the sports hall for his PE class, instead moving to the bench in the locker room and motioning you to sit. Feeling terribly awkward, you hoped he wasn't going to do anything out of anger, even though he had every right to be upset at your stupid behavior.

"About what he said," Peter took a deep breath, "it's nothing like that. I don't dig up some nasty stuff in the web to blackmail people. I've never done it. The reason why Mr. I-am-better-than-you said that is because I've made him take me into his little bodyguard group when I heard him talking to Loki. You're nice, and I wanted to help. Of course, Steve started acting like I was some creep, so he refused, and I had to remind him that, technically, he had to report your issue to the administration, not play a hero. I said that if I go and tell the whole story to the dean, Steve's gonna be in trouble because he knew who thieves were and didn't report them."

It was a loud off your mind. Goodness. Rogers called this a blackmail? Really? Just because Peter pushed Steve into taking him into their group?

You were less and less sure Rogers was sane. You definitely had to be careful around him.

"I can't believe he called it a blackmail." You admitted quietly, and the guy sent you a tired smile. "Peter, I'm so, so sorry. It was so stupid of me."

"Nah, don't worry. I'd freak out too if I didn't know the whole story."

You knew your apologies weren't enough, but you hoped Peter didn't take it to heart - if you can take such an accusation easily, that is. Shit, shit, shit, why did you believe everything these guys were saying? You didn't even know them in the first place! Why on Earth did you go asking them their opinions on others if all of them were biased, and every guy could twist the truth the way he liked? You shouldn't have let their words affect you that much.

"Whatever. At least now you know what Rogers is like." Peter sent you a grim smile and got up, picking his bright yellow sackpack from the floor. "Shit, I gotta go if I don't wanna be late. Let's meet in a library later, alright?"

"O-of course." You hurriedly stood up and left the lockers room after him, turning to the library: your Lit class was cancelled, so you decided to go study right away. At this time, the library was usually full, and you felt safe there.

Your thoughts were all about the guys again even when you were staring at your laptop, trying to focus on Excel numbers. Why did you feel like the atmosphere between them was so dense? If they were at such terms with each other, why did they group together to help you? What, because all of them loved you so much? It was ridiculous. There was something else to it, and you didn't know. You had a feeling no one was going to tell you the truth until you figured it all out by yourself.

Weird. It was all so weird. Steve's plan, their behavior, the relationships between them, and your nagging feeling they all were hiding something. Was it them who were actually following you?

The thought scared you to the point you started shivering. Oh shit.

"Hi there," the guy appeared behind your back so suddenly you almost jumped, looking at him wide-eyed, "sorry, did I startle you?"

"H-hi Jake! No, it's ok, I was just... studying." Both of you were talking in hushed voices, knowing the librarian would kick you out immediately if she heard some noise. "How are you?"

"I'm great, how're you?" You could hear concern in his voice: he was one of Thor's friends you met yesterday, and although you spoke briefly, Thor definitely told him more about you. "You look a bit worried."

"Oh, it's Math, I didn't really understand the topic, and we're having an exam on Monday... guess I'll be studying the whole weekend." You gave him your best smile to reassure you were totally ok, and the guy relaxed a little, smiling at you, too.

"I'm sure you'll pass. Thor said you're very smart."

What, he said that to all of them? Was he simply boasting about his girlfriend to his friends or was there something more to it?

"You're too kind. Thank you."

His smile grew wider, and he landed on the next seat to yours, resting his hands on the table. Apparently, there was something he wanted to talk to you about, and you grew uneasy.

"Listen, about these incidents... Thor told us all about it, so if you see any freaks following you around, you can message any of us, and we'll come right away." Looking at his serious expression, his bushy brows furrowed, you hoped he eas being sincere with you: you had enough with people you could no longer trust. "And also... that kid, if he's giving you troubles or anything, just let me know, and I'll tell him to keep his hands to himself"

Oh, he was talking about Peter, wasn't he? He had probably seen that silly photo. Wow, you though, Peter was totally right about Instagram: it was the best news source in the academy.

Thanking him for his concern, you laughed a little, convincing him there was nothing serious except for the theft and promising to tell him if anything weird would be going on. While it should have made you feel safer, in fact, you only grew more frustrated with this situation. You wanted to forget about these freaks and just spend you day like any normal student would, but everywhere you went people were staring at you as if you had a horn; one boyfriend or the other was always close to protect you from some unknown danger, and although you believed they tried to help, you hated the feeling they were hiding something from you. Why did you have to be going through all this? Wasn't it really better to drop off school, spend a year working and then apply to a better place?

Thinking of the faces your parents would make once you returned home, you realized it wasn't. This school with all those creeps wasn't worse than home that never felt like a safe place you wanted to come back to. Besides, all money you saved up until now were only good for buying food and things like that: you'd never afford to rent a decent place unless you found a well-paid job. It meant staying with your parents, and it wouldn't be much better than here, just different. If you wanted to drop off, you had to find a good place to stay.

Well, you could at least try, right?

When Peter met you in the library, the two of you no longer talked about anything important, simply studying together to prepare for the exams next week. It didn't feel off: from time to time you met his gaze, and the both of you smiled. You were thankful he didn’t talk about Steve or other guys or that weirdo in the lockers room.

Once you returned home, you went straight to bed, completely exhausted. Luckily, you did much more than yesterday, so you could rest now, but then you thought of Thor kissing you and bit down the pillow, angry at yourself. Why did you keep thinking of him right now?

______________

When you woke up the next morning, you felt like something was off: your body ached, your throat hurt, and your headache was only making it worse. Dammit, you caught a cold, probably. And that’s when it was finally the day to meet Steve, the guy you thought was a mastermind behind all these manipulations that were making you sick to the core. 

Anyway, it’s not like a mere cold would prevent you from doing everything you had planned. You left your bed and went to the bathroom, moving the dresser before again. 

Honestly, it felt terrible. It was definitely because of that flimsy dress you wore to school yesterday when the weather was becoming chilly. Argh. Watching your puffy eyes and swollen nose, you sneezed. Today you had to apply way more makeup to look decently.

Steve showed up earlier than either Thor or Peter: you had to skip your breakfast, hoping to buy something cheap in the cafeteria.

“Good morning.” He said with his everyday polite expression that soon shifted into a concerned one. “Are you alright?”

What, was it that bad? You did your absolute best to apply enough makeup and do your hair. Did you still look so sick?

“Good morning. Yes, I’m ok, just feeling a little sleepy.” You yawned on purpose, covering your mouth with your hand, and Steve’s face softened.

“Did you study all night?”

“Yep, exams are driving me a little crazy.”

“I understand. I also stayed late last night.”

Of course, the student council president studying all days long to be number one student in the academy. If you didn’t know of his twisted nature, you’d think he was the most typical nerd.

You spent most of the time either in silence or talking about studies, the academy, and everything related to it. Steve acted like a gentleman and a scholar, albeit a little too demonstratively. Walking with you as if he were a king of the place, he constantly replied to greetings of others, waved to his acquaintances and smiled. You felt so off you wanted to find Loki and walk with him: unlike Steve, he was considered unpleasant by the prevailing majority of students.

“Are you sure you’re going to be alright?” America golden boy asked you for the last time, and you forced yourself to smile.

“Of course. Thanks for coming, see you later, Steve.”

As he finally left you in peace, you almost fell down into your chair, your fever only getting worse despite the fact you took some painkillers. It was going to be a long day.

_________

Tags: @finleyjayne @alexakeyloveloki   ​@helenaeisenhower @villanellevi @hurricanerin ​@inlovewiththefictionalcharacters @chris-evans-indian-fanfic @navegandoaciegas @rosalynshields @brattycherub @sllooney @angrythingstarlight @lookiamtrying @buckysbunny @stargazingfangirl18 @dillybuggg @literate-lamb @cosicas-cuquis @sarge-barnes-sir @buckybarnesplumwhore @jaysayey @megzdoodle @gotnofucks @lux-ravenwolf @ximebebx @jeremyrennerfanxxxx123 @sourpatchspinster @biiskuitx @stupendouslovegardener @iheartsebandchris @lovelydarkdaydream @soleil-dor @illyrianprincess @vampirestrawberries @goodgodimaweirdperson @frontmanash @freya-heya @yandematic @mariatietacapitu @d3monslust @maybesandohnos @ibeatuptwinks @mangobangi @nectav @whatever-happened-to-the-ducks

[odetogyus]

wait

↳pairing/s: idol boyfriend!yugyeom x fem!reader

↳genre: angst (w/ a happy ending lol), idol!au

↳warnings: profanity, mentions of alcohol consumption, trust issues

↳song: wait by maroon 5

✎author's note: idk what I was going through when I wrote this but this was from my 2018 archive and I think this baby needs to see the light of day,, so here it is!

—

"The concert should be done now," you thought to yourself while staring at your phone.

Since your brother's wedding was in 2 days, you didn't have time to fly to Toronto to see your boyfriend and his group perform. You've been on a few tours with them– sometimes working as a stylist for Yugyeom and the whole team. JYP himself even sends you an extra ticket to every single country the boys go to just in case you wanted to come with, but this time however, you had to stay home to help out with your brother's wedding.

It's been almost 3 years since you started dating Yugyeom. What started out as a very unexpected interaction at a dance showcase, later bloomed into something so beautiful. Your relationship wasn't always pretty. In fact, it's true what they say about the first year; it definitely is the hardest.

You've seen them grow, not just as artists but as people, too. You've built such tight relationships with each and every one of them, even the staff members. GOT7 was a family and you were over the moon to be a part of it.

After a few hours of waiting, you decided to take a hot shower before taking a nap. It was a tiring day for you and your family. The wedding was in 2 days and there were a lot of things left to do. You also knew very well that the boys come out exhausted after every show, and so you fought back the slightest feeling of worry in your head and fell into a deep sleep.

–

You woke up to the sound of your phone going off.

BREAKING NEWS

MEMBERS OF THE KPOP GROUP– GOT7, WERE SEEN AT A CLUB IN TORONTO AFTER THEIR CONCERT. MEMBERS MARK TUAN, JACKSON WANG & KIM YUGYEOM WERE SPOTTED HEAVILY INTOXICATED WITH 3 UNKNOWN WOMEN JOINING THEM AT THEIR TABLE. NO OFFICIAL STATEMENTS REGARDING THE INCIDENT HAS BEEN RELEASED BY JYP ENTERTAINMENT.

People you knew and didn't know were tagging you everywhere. Every photograph, every article, they all had their eyes on Yugyeom, and they all had their eyes on you, too.

Your brother's fiancée barged into your room shortly after the news broke out. She was always there for you, and the relationship you shared was a very special one. You trusted her, and you never hid anything from her after the first time she saw you cry.

"Y/N," your almost sister-in-law cooed. You both knew that it was very unlikely of Yugyeom to act that way, but then again, the people surrounding them aren’t always angels. No one really is.

Just then, the name you've been waiting to see finally popped up on your screen, but this time, you weren't sure if you had the guts to answer him.

"Should I answer?" You asked, sounding miserable as ever. Tears escaped your eyes, glistening like broken glass when the sunlight hits the surface.

"You need to hear it from him, Y/N. I'll be in the kitchen, let me know if you need anything."

Accepting the call, you swallowed hard enough and prepared yourself for what could either be the most painful truth you had to hear, or the biggest lie ever you had to believe.

"Y/N.. hey, please let me explain," Yugyeom's voice was incredibly raspy and shaky, and you knew damn well that he was in tears. It's only been a few hours since the incident, so it was safe to say that he was still quite hungover. You knew they were well taken care of, but what happened cannot be rewritten again. What's done is done.

"Go ahead," you answered. Holding back your tears is always the hardest when you know that you have no choice but to endure the pain.

"We had a few drinks, and we had fun. We had so much fun. The boys and I, the staff. Me and Jackson hyung tried the hose thingy, it was so– cool– but, but I'm sorry babe, I'm so sorry–"

"Do you just.. wanna talk when you’re not like.. this, Yugyeom? Because if you're gonna keep doing this, I might as well just hang up and talk to my fucking wall–"

Oh, the theatrics of a brokenhearted beast.

"No.. stop, listen to me, I'm trying to explain!"

"Okay, then do it," you said angrily. The tears from your eyes were flowing down uncontrollably. It was so painful that you couldn't even hear anything else but the sound of his lies breaking you continuously.

"Mark hyung joined us, and we got so drunk, and next thing you know, these random girls sat with us at the table. I don't remember a lot but– I think one even bit my neck– it hurts, and she– I think she sat on my lap but I think I tried to push her off but I passed out. I don't really remember anything else–"

"You know, Gyeom? Sometimes, I wish you knew what it's like to be the one that patiently waits for you to come home, hoping that the worries in your head just disappear. How could you be so irresponsible? Man.. how could you do this to me? To us?"

"Y/N, you know I love you more than anything else but for fuck's sake, will you please believe me? My head hurts so much and you're acting up! Jesus!"

Yugyeom knew not to push your buttons, but in that state of his, he pushed it all, not missing one.

"Well, if that’s the case then I’m sorry. I’m sorry for caring too much, and for being all up in your business all the fucking time. Have fun remembering how you got that stupid hickey of yours, I’m done–"

"No, you are not hanging up on me, Y/N. It was a mistake, okay? God, my head is killing me and I just.. need you to believe me. I drank too much, and I know it’s bad, but I swear to fucking God, I didn’t do anything to hurt you. I would never hurt you. But you need.. to stop being difficult.. you’re making things worse here–"

The tension grew even more. You were both screaming your lungs out at each other, thousands of miles away from the other.

"Really now?" You spat bitterly. That was it for you. The last straw. "Well then, I know my brother invited you to the wedding, but don't bother showing up. I don't want to see you."

Your harsh words must've hurt Yugyeom so much, that his screams of anger just managed to slip out of his already worn out body.

"You're really throwing this all away– huh? Almost 3 years worth of memories? Just because I made a mistake, just because I don't remember everything that happened to me while I was intoxicated? You think I wanted those girls to come close to us? You're so– Y/N, you really think I wanted to hurt you, don't you? So now.. you do this? You're really breaking up with me? On the phone? Are you fucking kidding me?"

"Trust, Yugyeom. Trust. You broke the most important thing we built. Do you know how hard it is to do this? To date someone like you? People send me death threats, Yugyeom. Just because I decided to be with you. Do you even know how I feel? Do you know how Mark's girlfriend feels? How Jackson's girlfriend feels? Because I do. We all fucking get it!"

"Okay, trust. But let me ask you Y/N, if things were so difficult, why are you still here? Why date me when you could've left? That's what you wanna do anyway, right? You wanna leave, you wanna be free, right?"

But it’s not freedom if it’s not with you.

The bitter taste of surprise was too much for you. It was never meant to hurt that much, but it did.

"Wanna know why I'm still here, Yugyeom?"

"Why," he spat coldly.

"Because I thought that– loving you, oh god, I thought that that was more than enough to believe that we'd make it. But at this point, maybe we're both just better off alone. Separate ways, Gyeom."

Yugyeom let out a faint laugh. The most painful laugh one could ever laugh. A laugh of defeat.

"You're really doing this, huh? This is what you want? You're really doing this to us–"

"You don't need to show up at the wedding.. I'll just, tell them about us after. We'll meet when we're both ready to talk. Be safe."

"Fuck this, Y/N. Fuck–"

And with that, you hung up.

Your heart was broken once again, not by the same person, but because of the same reason you kept your heart safe and hidden in the first place.

Trust.

Yugyeom was your true love. The man you believed to be was your person. The person you entrusted your fragile self to. The person you needed.

But maybe he doesn't need you.

Putting your phone on silent, you cried yourself to sleep, wishing you'd never wake up.

—

wedding day.

Your eyes were still tired and gloomy, but you were better. You haven't heard from him since the fight and although it hurt you too much to be that person to hang up and end things, you knew better than to mope all day and question your existence.

"You look so beautiful in that dress! I'm so happy you chose that style! It's just perfect," your brother's soon-to-be wife exclaimed. She was the one who held you tight when your heart broke for the wrong guy, and she was also the one who held you when Yugyeom couldn't. It's safe to say she's the sister you never had.

"Thanks, I'm happy to be here. I'm so excited for you and my brother. I don't know what you see in him but I'm thankful you stuck around."

The bride smiled with tears welling up in her eyes. "You stick around for the one you love, Y/N. Even when the storm hits and everything falls apart, wait it out, then love again."

The wedding venue was everything you imagined it to be. A beautiful pathway to the garden, red and white roses everywhere, and photographs of your brother and his soon-to-be wife hung from the stringed lights wrapped around the tall trees to create the most beautiful ambiance.

Your quick peek of the venue ended since it was almost time for the actual ceremony. You were one of the bridesmaids, and you had to be wherever the bride was.

From afar, a tall figure walked towards the venue in a red suit. His dark hair complemented his outfit, and his handsome face was the cherry on top of it all.

Yugyeom showed up to the wedding a few minutes before it actually started. He took his time exchanging words of happiness and support to your brother. Yugyeom's relationship with your brother started out like any other brother – boyfriend relationship, but the two ended up being very close friends. A few moments before announcing the beginning of the ceremony, Yugyeom found his way to his seat. He sat close to the front, but in the corner.

The ceremony began, and every second felt longer than it should have. Closing your eyes, you took slow, but steady, steps to the podium where your brother was. You both agreed to welcome the bride with your whole family present next to him.

dirty looks from your mother

never seen you in a dress that color, no

it's a special occasion

not invited but I'm glad I made it

He looked at you like it's the first time he's ever laid eyes on you. His heart thumped like crazy, seeing how your hair fell perfectly down the length of your spine, in a red dress that exposed most of your back. Yugyeom couldn't resist every urge to kiss you. Every thought of you possibly breaking up with him completely made the poor boy pale. He was madly in love with you, in every possible way, that losing you meant losing everything to him.

The moment you stood next to your brother, your eyes met his. The eyes you hated to look into, but missed the most. Yugyeom stared at you for a long time, before you both snapped out of the trance only you two were in. You saw him mouth a "wow" before facing the bride and giving her a hug.

Walking to your designated seat, your mind went crazy just imagining how hard it would be to keep your composure when Yugyeom would literally be inches away from you.

"Beautiful," Yugyeom said in awe as you sat next to him. "You're beautiful, Y/N."

Without looking at him, you extended your gratitude. "Thank you, Yugyeom," was all you could say.

You both tried so hard to focus on the wedding. For the most part, it felt like no one else was there. You were in the moment, and so was he.

The exchange of vows was definitely something. Every word your brother and his wife exchanged was pure love. And deep down, you prayed that the love you needed was Yugyeom's.

oh, let me apologize

i'll make up, make up, make up, make up for all those times

your love, I don't wanna lose

i'm begging, begging, begging, begging, I'm begging you

As if on cue, Yugyeom held your hand without looking at you. His hand was shaky, and so was yours, but you didn't pull away. You held onto him, too. You held onto him like your life depended on it, and you held onto the person that longs for you the most.

"I do," your brother speaks into the microphone, looking at his woman. Yugyeom holds your hand even tighter, saying the same words your brother said, loud enough for you to hear it. Only you.

I do.

The bride reciprocates, and tears immediately stream down your face as the rush of emotions take over you.

Not wanting to lose the love of your life ever again, you follow suit, and said the same words the bride said. Only for you and Yugyeom, it meant something else. Only something the two of you could understand.

I do.

You both stood firmly, not letting go of each other, when the officiator finally said the words everyone wanted to hear.

You may now kiss the bride.

Not wasting a precious second, Yugyeom pulled you into a tight embrace, holding your head against his chest. His lips planted kisses at the top of your head, and suddenly everything was right in the world.

The scent of his perfume was home to you, and it made you feel so much better.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm so stupid, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry," Yugyeom whispered, still keeping you in his arms.

"I'm sorry, too, Gyeom," you answered, trying hard not to let the tears roll down your cheek and ruin your makeup.

Yugyeom finally kissed you.

He kissed you without stealing the spotlight from the newly weds. He kissed you softly, but it was clear that he longed for it. For you. He kissed you just the way you needed to be kissed, reminding you that he is yours in full surrender.

"I love you, Gyeom."

You finally meet his gaze. The prettiest eyes you've ever seen, and he really was the best thing that's ever happened to you.

"I love you, Y/N. I love you."

Wait it out, then love again.

[patchoulimademoiselle]

Guilty. (Part 2.)

Part Two. 

Steve Rogers (Lawyer AU) x Reader Insert.

Word count: 4.9k

Warnings: Natasha Romanoff gives off crazy sex appeal, smoking, self destructive habits, laguange, masturbation, SMUT, fingering, choking.  

Masterlist. 

Part two: 

The next time you see Steve, he's freshly showered with wet hair, clad in a navy suit that brings out the blue of his eyes. He looks tired, even despite all he's done to clean himself up. His eyes are red, his face expressionless, and if it weren't for the coffee in his hand you would be concerned he won't make it through the day.

He grabs you when he gets close enough, hand on your elbow to pull you in close, "I need you on the next one." Is all he says, voice a whisper.

"What is it?" You ask, hand on his chest to stop him from walking inside your office. Wanda is here, and you have something you need to tell him as well. "We need to talk. Privately."

He nods, glancing down at his wrist watch. "Your place in an hour, I need to pack up here. Send Wanda home, don't let her do anything else."

That gets your head spinning, gears turning, the strange way she was acting this morning and the urgency in his demeanor, something is wrong. Very wrong.

You nod, patting twice where your hand rests. You turn on your heel, leaving him to watch after you. You place your hand on Wanda's shoulder, "You've done great today, hun. But I'm going to pack up and head out, you need to do the same. Can you take the metro?"

She nods. "Yeah, sure. Found something worth chasing?" She asks, pencil dropping in her hand.

"Something like that." You sigh. "I'll call you when I need you again. Be safe, and let me know when you're home."

"Sure thing." She looks happy to be sent home early, but annoyed. You woke her up early only to send her home after a few hours. Hopefully you would be able to explain yourself, but for now, she's a liability, and she needs to be gone.

You lock the door behind her, turning to Steve who stands with his arms crossed, deep in thought even though his eyes are already on you.

"Wanda said something to me today-"

"Her brother is involved."

"What?" He cuts you off before you could even finish.

"Her brother is a lawyer on the case. He's her twin, young and inexperienced just like her. But he's licensed, and he's working the case."

You're shocked, sinking back against the door for support. "Do you think she's been leaking information?"

He shakes his head. "No, she doesn't know anything, because we don't know anything."

It's an exaggeration, but it's true, you've hardly covered anything at all for her to start leaking information to her brother. She may not even know he's on the case yet, let alone been able to agree to spy for him.

"So what do we do?" You ask.

"Keep her here, see if she talks." He says, hand on his chin. "Filter her tasks, minor enough to not be important, but important enough to not make her think we're on to her."

"That or miss-feed her." You suggest. "She won't be present in court, she isn't permitted to be without my permission. Whatever she feeds them should be off stray enough to give us an advantage."

"That's good." He nods, eyes flicking to you for a moment. "That's real good."

You have the nerve to smile, letting out a puff of air. You won't tell him about the car ride this morning, at least not yet. Not until he's settled. He's still stressed, you can see it on the wrinkles on his forehead, in the way his fingers twitch against his chin. You know what he's going to ask before he asks it, eyes floating up to your face. "Cigarette?"

You nod to your purse, and he's quick to get it for himself, not even caring to step out on the balcony before lighting one to smoke it. You eye the smoke detector warily. "I need you to come with me for the next one. It's a woman, Natasha Romanoff, and she's going to eat me alive the moment she sets eyes on me."

You aren't sure what that means, but you know it can't be good. You've never heard of her, lawyer or not, and that's never a good sign.

"What do you need me for?" You ask.

"You're a woman, you can read other women. It's up to you to decide if she's full of shit or not."

He speaks so bluntly, as if you two are nothing more than colleagues after all, and a part of you feels uneasy about it. It feels like you're walking into a trap, it feels like all the odds have been stacked against you, and rather than reassure you, his anxiety is making you feel even worse.

"Steve, stop talking like this." You groan, slamming your head back against the door. You still haven't walked away from it. "You're making it sound like we're apart of the mafia and not the public justice system."

He smiles, eyes a little lighter. "We might as well be." Is all he says, walking towards the balcony, letting himself outside.

If you weren't tired before you definitely are now, the lack of sleep the night before on top of all this excitement was proving to be too much for you. You sit back at your desk and take a sip of water, closing your eyes for a moment. You reflect on everything you've just learned, the risk you're taking by keeping Wanda on your team.

She's a good girl, hard working, and it hurts to think that she may betray you down the road. It would be easier to let her go now, gently and easily, tell her that the firm doesn't have enough funding to pay her, tell her that you're unfit to have an assistant. Anything is better than letting the poor girl walk into a trap. You can hear Steve scolding you before you even suggest it. Letting her go would not only be a sign of weakness, exposing a soft spot to women on your team, but also alerting Stark's lawyers that you know what their next move will be. The small advantage you have will be gone in an instant.

The life of a lawyer is a hard one.

"Falling asleep on me?" Steve knocks against your desk top, your eyes snap open to glare at him.

"I wish." You groan, sitting up in your chair. "What do we need to go to my place for?"

"In an hour," He reminds you. "We have something else to talk about, something entirely unrelated to this case."

That has your attention, sleep deprivation leaving you. "About?"

There's a smile on his face that you can't place, a ghost of a smirk curling his lips in a way that makes your stomach flip and flushes your cheeks. "You'll see." He doesn't give you time to dwell on it, nodding towards the door, telling you it's time to go.

You grab your purse and take one last sip of water, pushing your hair back off your face before you stand. Your heels echo as you follow after him, making sure to lock the door to your office behind you.

Natasha Romanoff is a character, that's all you can say while being respectful of her practice as a former lawyer. She's witty, giving off a sex appeal that leaves even you flustered a few times, not to mention Steve. He's a speechless fool every time she locks eyes with him, and a part of you is jealous by that, the other part knowing you have no choice but to speak up and save him from the torture she's putting him through. It's all a test, and now you understood your purpose in going along. He needed saving, a solid reminder to remain professional no matter what. If you weren't there, she probably would have tried to seduce him.

But you don't fall under her spell so easily, remaining stone faced as she throws her best wit at you, and her most obscene pick up lines. She's good. She knows how good she looks, and she uses it to her full advantage. It's a dirty trick to use in a court room, but it's gained her a successful career that you can only dream off, so you try to show her nothing but respect as you drill her with your questions.

"We're here about Stark." You cut the formalities, Steve shifts and readjusts his suit jacket. "We can't walk into this blind, we need to know his strategies."  

She's smiling at you over a cup of tea, she offered you one and of course you both declined, not classy enough to drink something like tea. "Stark is unpredictable." She says, lipstick leaving a bright red print behind on her cup. "Let's start there."

Notepad and pen at the ready, Steve pulls out his phone to record, setting it out on the table for all to see. Natasha takes note of it and rolls her eyes. "You can quote me on anything you want, but don't think I'm going to testify." She says. "Stark will ruin all of us, don't be stupid."

It was stupid, the way Steve laid all of your cards out on the table. It shows how desperate you really are, you have no tricks up your sleeve and no back up plan. But the again, it could be a front. Natasha doesn't know that you have a potential spy on your team, she also doesn't know that you're fully aware of just how desperate Stark must be as well. Either way, you trust her enough to be truthful, but calling her to the stand would be a suicide mission. She's obviously afraid of Stark, and you aren't blind to the fact that she would turn on you if it were in her favor.

"We don't want you on the stand." Steve says what you were thinking, and you try to hide a smile. "We just want to know what he'll try to throw at us."

You're in sync, two of the same mind, and my god, if there was ever a time you wanted to kiss him, it would be right now. He looks so serious, determination spread across his features, yet there's a tint to his cheeks that gives away his exhaustion, the lack of sleep you had the night before would soon catch up with you both, coffee or not, and you have a feeling that somehow it's going to inconvenience you.

"Everything he can." Natasha sets down her tea cup, shifting in her seat. "Especially whatever this is." She waves a finger between you both, "This protectiveness you have of each other will be the end of you. They'll dig into it and exploit it."

You know that, Steve knows that, and it's the very reason that there is nothing going on between you to begin with. But the chemistry is there, there is no hiding that. A stranger could tell, a woman who has laid eyes on you for just a few minutes. It's obvious that there is something, even if it's not official, and even if it hasn't been explored.

If her observation phases him, he doesn't let it show, eyebrows furrowed. "He plays dirty, sure. We know that. Tell me something I can't hear anywhere else," Steve says. "What has he asked from you personally as a lawyer."

Her eyes slit down into a glare, one that stops your heart beat even though it isn't directed at you. "I'm not going to testify."

"Yes, we know." You sigh, tapping a single fingernail on the table. "Off the record, the recording is just for our notes. Just tell us exactly how dirty he can get. What are some things that he's asked of you in the past?" What laws has he broken?

She hesitates, pondering her options and their consequences, then lets out a heavy sigh, settling back into her seat with her fingers pressed to her temples. "This is going to ruin my credibility." She says. "I can't give you specifics, but he does like to bend the rules a bit. He looks for loopholes, breaking one law in favor of another to cover his ass."

She stands, walking back to her desk and pulling open a drawer, you and Steve exchange a look, his hand clamps down on your thigh as he offers you a tired smile, forced, but the gesture shines through nonetheless. "I do have something I can give you though. It's a case I worked on, it was kept out of the media, but there may be some details here that can help you." She digs around, fingers skimming alphabetically arranged folders, plucking one up and bringing it back over to you. "It's a lawsuit over workers comp'," She says, eyes on you. "It's not much, but it's all I can offer."

It's good enough, she's smart, and she knows exactly what's being put on the line by helping you. So you take what you can get, nodding, you take the file from her hand. "Thank you." You say, standing, and Steve follows suit. You shake her hand. "You know how the reach us, let me know if we can ever return the favor in the future."

You've made an ally, you realize now that Natasha wasn't a dirty lawyer, she was just smart enough to know better than risk her career and reputation. She's got a bit of red in her ledger, but by helping you she's wiping it out, doing what she can where she can, and you respect it wholeheartedly.

You both leave, Steve's hand on your back to push you forward as you leave Natasha's office. In his car, you open the file she gave you, looking over the case she was assigned. It's a couple years old, but fairly similar to what you're dealing with. Stark Industries refusing to pay a worker, the lawsuit was buried under false claims of fraud, the employee was fired and had to pay a settlement fine. "Steve," You reach over and pat his arm, his eyes floating over to you for a moment, his hand flexing on the steering wheel. "This is golden."

The small handout Natasha gave you is huge, a gold mine, all you had to do was find this former employee and convince them to go on the stand along with James Barnes. "What is it?" Steve asks.

"You need to meet with, Brock Rumlow." Your eyes scan the file. "Former employee who sued for workers comp, Stark buried him under false fraud charges."

Steve hums, thumb tapping against the steering wheel, "I'll go by tomorrow after I look over his file. Offer him immunity, and a chance to reopen his case. He'll be fully compensated, there's no reason he'll say no if he's looking for a chance to get his justice."

You sound like vigilantes, smiling to yourself as you shut the file and tuck it into your purse for safe keeping. You don't go back to the office, Steve turns down your street and you remember suddenly that he wanted to meet at your place. The nerves set in immediately, a silence falling between you as he pulls into your driveway, cutting the engine of his car.

He takes off his seat belt, shifts a bit to look at you, and for the first time, you're nervous to be alone with him.

"Of all the years I've known you, I've never known you to be shy, Y/n." He says, tone deep and voice mocking your demeanor.

You glare over at him, "I've never known you to be so reserved with me."

Both are lies. You were shy at first, eager to please and never wanting to disappoint, his every criticism molding you into the lawyer you are today. He was never open with you at first, his trust was something you had to earn, but now that your dynamic was established, the silence between you feels like something from a past life. You, a shiny new assistant, and he your mentor. A flash back into the past, you feel so small sitting next to him.

You expect him to say something coy, but his eyes are tired as he looks at you. "Are you going to invite me in or not?"

With a roll of your eyes, and him hot on your trail, you get out of the car and unlock the front door, letting him inside. You step out of your heels, dropping in height, and move quickly to get away from him before he can comment on it. You head into the kitchen, putting on a fresh pot of coffee, turning to find him standing at the island, eyes locked on you.

"What did you want to talk about?" You lean back against the sink, arms crossed, a safe distance between you. Yet you still feel a bit flustered under his gaze.

"Us," He says it simply, as if that should answer your question. "This case is going to be dangerous for us."

The way he says the word sends a chill up your spine, and you can't stop yourself from shivering. The word weighs heavily in your mind and on his tongue, the hint of something more, the same something everyone sees but you're too afraid to acknowledge.

"There is no us."

The words sound flat to your own ears, unconvinced, and the pointed look he gives you from across the island says the same. "There is an us." He says, palms flat on the marble table top. "It's forbidden, and unspoken, but it's there." He pauses, sighs to himself, "And it's driving me crazy."

Driving him crazy, your memories take you back to your fresh days at the firm, those days where you didn't have to pretend not to like each other, where you could bask in his appreciative gaze and not have to think twice about the consequences. You wish it could feel that way now, pinned under his stare, you wish you could enjoy it, but all you feel is the risk you're taking by even been here right now, completely alone in your house where anyone could assume anything.

He licks his lips, makes a move to step around the counter, and you stop him before he can get any closer, finger pointed at him in warning, "Don't you dare."

Don't you dare come any closer because I won't be able to stop myself.

You busy yourself with pouring two mugs of coffee, adding cream and sugar for him, just sugar for you, glaring at the man as you slide his mug across the island to him. He matches your stare, forever challenging you, not stopping even as he takes a sip.

"We can't." Is all you say. "We can't, and you know we can't. So don't."

The air falls silent between you, and for a moment you think he's going to listen to you. You think he's going to stay away and stick to the rules he set long ago when you first met. But then he sets his mug down, rounding the island to takes yours from you as well, setting it aside.

He's on you quick, fingers on your jaw to hold you in place as he captures your lips in a warm kiss. Your eyes flutter closed, the feeling you've longed for washing over you, leaning into his touch. His other hand is on your hip, grip digging in, and it's enough to snap you out of it.

You pull back, leaning over the sink behind you. He tries to follow. "Steve-" Your voice comes out as a strangled wine, and it doesn't help your case, his lips peppering against your jaw instead.

"Everything you do is such a tease." He says, fingers sliding down your throat. "Even when you try to resist me, you were designed to tempt me."

You don't know where this is coming from, he always seems so collected around you. But here, now, he's losing it, your very existence eating away at his resolve.

"Your little skirts and high heels, you have no idea-" He cuts himself off, shoulders rising with each breath he takes, grinding his hips against you, and oh, you feel it.

You aren't a lawyer right now, all your training and years of experience out of the window. Right now you were completely at his mercy, held under his grip, right where he wants you. You gasp as you feel his grip tighten around your neck, pulling you to meet his lips once again.

You don't resist the second time, eyes closing as you wrap your arms around his neck. He hums against your lips, approval, hands dropping to hoist you up on the edge of your sink, prying your legs apart to wrap around his torso.

You can feel his bare hands on your thighs, inching their way up under your skirt, it makes you flinch, touch starved, not expecting the intimacy of him holding you here like this. Your thoughts betray you, your body betrays you, your back arching into his touch, pressing you against his chest. You've had a little taste, his hands warm as they explore, and now you've decided you want more.

His lips are warm with coffee, lips sweet with sugar, and when he grinds into you this time, you feel it right between your legs, the material of his pants brushing against your panties. You don't hold back this time, moaning into his mouth. He swallows it eagerly, tugging you even closer if possible.

"Do you remember?" He whispers against your lips, letting you catch your breath. "Do you remember how I used to spread you out on my desk just like this?"

He doesn't let you answer though, eyes falling from yours to examine you fully, and you can feel when his gaze reaches your sex, "Cute panties."

You want him to ruin them, push them to the side and stretch them out as he fucks you. Right here, bent over the sink like you're the house keeper, his dirty little secret.

A whine slips past your lips at the thought, your legs squeezing his hips in an attempt to grant yourself some kind of friction, and he had the nerve to coo at you, kissing your lips. "You little succubus." He says, "I've dreamed about this."

Something about Steve Rogers naked in bed and dreaming of you sounds dirty, and you decide you like it, suddenly his kisses aren't enough for you.

"Steve-" Again, you call his name, not sure what else to say. But the urgency is there, the strain in your voice and the desperation in your eyes is all clear to him as you muster up enough courage to touch him, fingers cupping him through his pants, your knuckles brushing against your own sex at the same time.

He inhales sharply, closing his eyes, and you enjoy the brief power you have over him, massaging his erection. It doesn't last long, fingers wrapping around your wrist to pull you away.

He draws back as far as your legs let him, eyes locking with yours. "This will never happen, I meant that." He says, "But I can't stop wanting you."

It's like he's trying to torture you, and you've had enough. "Please just touch me." You're not one to beg. But for this, you would drop to your knees if he asked you to. "If you can't do anything else, just touch me."

He hesitates, finger pushing your panties to the side, the pad of his thumb gliding through your slick. It pulls a groan form him that you've never heard before, realizing that you're this wet for him. "Fuck, Y/n." He pants against your mouth, kissing long forgotten as he steals a glance down at the scene in front of him. "You're so good."

You don't know what he means by that, you don't know if he's talking about how you look, or how you feel, but either way you relish in his praise, nudging his face with yours to kiss him again.

He's greedy, slipping his tongue into your mouth, drawing slow circles with the pad of his thumb as you grind into his hand. It becomes too much, the pressure directly where you need it, and you try to back away for some air.

"No, don't run." His grip on your thigh is tight as he holds you in place. "This is what you wanted, isn't it? My hand up your skirt?" He kisses your cheek, pressing his thumb hard against your clit. You whine, body twitching at the intensity of his touch. "This is what you've been after all those late nights you pranced around teasing me?"

Teasing him how? You can't think, his words too much when they're accompanied with touch.

"Hair a mess, shirt undone, you don't realize what you look like?" He's slow in slipping his fingers inside of you, "You look good enough to fuck."

All the times he's reminded you why this can't happen fly right out of the window at the thought of him fucking you, at the thought of what his cock might look like, tip swollen red and leaking precum, stretching you out slowly.

"You want me to fuck you, don't you?"

You've never moved so quick, head nodding at a pace that rattles your brain a little. And he has the nerve to smirk, shaking his head at you. "I can't, baby." It makes you whine, and he's quick to shush you with a kiss. "There will be no stopping if I do, you know what's at stake."

But his actions contrast his words, cock growing in his pants right before your very eyes. His fingers pick up speed, his other hand at the small of your back to balance you, "Don't move." Is all he says, fingers moving at a rapid pace, the palm of his hand brushing your clit.

You clench around his fingers, feeling your pleasure start to build up, and it makes him shudder at the feeling. He can see it, your pussy throbbing in anticipation as he fucks you with his fingers, and he wants nothing more than to replace them with his cock. He groans, closing his eyes, not able to stand the sight of it.

But then you do something unexpected, eyes snapping open when you reach to undo his pants, freeing his erection. It springs up at attention, red and swollen, the sight of it alone makes you jolt, fingers eager to touch him.

He gasps at your touch, because you do something he's never felt before, your palm cupping his tip and smearing his precum as you slowly jerk him off, his hips matching your every movement.

When he cums, it's warm against the tops of your thighs, glistening as he continues to fuck his fingers into you. Your toes curl, and he realizes that you're struggling to orgasm. He decides to take mercy on you, pulling you against his chest, voice in your ear, "Is this what you need?" He asks, kissing your neck. "Can't come without my voice in your head?"

He's teasing you, throwing it right in your face that you can't get off without a little affection, but you don't care, panting and desperate, teetering on the edge of what you want.

"It's okay, I got you." He nudges his nose along your jaw, pulling back to steak a kiss from you. You hate the fact that it's helping. And then, "Cum."

And you do, hard, twitching under his hold. He kisses you through it, fingers slowing ever so slightly, until finally you're left slumped against him. He reaches for a dish towel, wiping you clean before helping you back down onto your feet. You feel exhausted, panting for breath, sweat coating your face, too tired to register the way he slips his fingers into his mouth.

"You did good work today," He says, leaning in to kiss you one last time, and you taste yourself on his lips. "Get some sleep."

He lets you go then, smile tired and lazy as he walks around the island. "Steve, my car."

He doesn't say anything in response to that, he only shrugs his shoulders, the atmosphere shifting once again. "We need to stay on our toes." He says. "And you need to meet with James at least once before the trial. He requested it. I'll take you."

It amazes you how quickly he recovered, just seconds ago he was cumming across your thighs and now he's stone faced as if he didn't just lick your cum off of his fingers.

"Okay. I'll meet with James tomorrow, you can meet with Brock." You nod at your own suggestion. "It will give me an excuse to keep Wanda away tomorrow."

He finishes his coffee and leaves, not saying another word, and a part of you feels oddly rejected by it. He comes here, gets you all worked up, chases a nut and then leaves. The worst part is that you can't deny how much you enjoyed it. The feeling of his lips against yours, the dirty words he whispered in your ear, his cock hard in your hand. It has you horny all over again, the shower head pressed to your sex as you shower, eyes closed tight as you imagine it being something else entirely.

You sleep well that night, the ghost feeling of his hands on your body, and it's the best sleep you've had in a while.

---------------------------

Steve is a piece of shit, and I love it. 

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[unusualvisionsblog]

Sky full of star: Chapter 1

My first original series/ book! Ah I'm super nervous and excited. Its pretty cringy I guess but I hope y'all don't hate it yeet.

Summary : Kathleen Hunter, 23 and a redhead is a daring and an ambitious flight attendant who wants to travel the world. But when her jobs brings her to a new love and brings back an old flame, what will Kathleen do?

Warnings : none actually, cringe probably, swearing later.

There might be a few spelling mistake since I posted this at like 1am yeet

Word count : 1615 or something

So here we go oof

CHAPTER 1

Never had she hated her life more. Her alarm didn't ring and she had already stubbed her toe on that darn bedside table. Ouch. She really couldn't  afford to be late today.Sighing deeply, she checked the time. Today was really important for her,  because if this flight went well, her career would really take a jump. Being a flight attendant was definitely not an easy job. She had to deal with rude passengers and crying babies. She looked at herself in the mirror, biting her lips in criticism. Her strawberry blonde hair were a mess but there wasn't enough time to do a decent hair style.

Kathleen would never believe anyone whenever they complimented her on her looks, because having been called plain and boring by her mother for 23 years, it was hard to believe anything else really.

But when someone else would see her for the first time, they would notice how the  loose tendrils of her silky hair would cover her face and how her alluring blue eyes would peek out and how they would shine brilliantly when her pink lips uplifted to form a sweet smile.

Putting her hair in a quick messy bun, she got dressed and grabbed a coffee before leaving. She quickly reached the bus stop and waited, tapping her feet constantly and after every two sips, checking the time. Lost in her thoughts, she didn't notice a group of suave business men and women heading towards her  when suddenly "BAM!". A young man talking to his colleague bumped into the frowning woman. At this sudden motion, Kathleen stepped back, dropping the hot coffee on her uniform. Now this really was the cherry on top of an already bad day.  She crossed her arms, glaring right into the brown eyes of the fair young man, "Excuse me, are you actually freaking blind? You've completely ruined my day AND my coffee!"

Taken aback, "I apologise for the coffee but this is just as much your fault as it is mine" the man huffed, his brows creased. This only infuriated Kathleen more and she was more than ready to retort back,"Hah! You- " when the woman next to the man interjected,"David we really don't have time to argue with random people on the street, you're getting late!" and with that they all moved forward with David looking over his shoulder and scowling at the woman one last time, muttering, "God what a horrible start to the day."

Having finally reached the airport, Kathleen quickly changed into her second set of uniform and did her make up before getting on board the flight.

As tiring and exhausting this job was, Kathleen really did love being a flight attendant as it was the only way she got to travel the world. She'd been to France, Germany, Italy, India.. the list goes on and on.

She had met people who had impacted her life throughout her journey and she was excited for her next one and if this went well, there was going to be a sweet sweet salary bump for her.

Having helped all the passengers in the economy section feel  comfortable, she moved to the business class where she finally got a chance to talk to her  best friend, Tracy Sawyer. Tracy smiled brightly at her as she walked towards her, "Omg, are you excited?! This is your first flight with you in charge!! You are so going to kill it!"

"Wow you have way more confidence in me then I have  for myself." She chuckled in reply.

"Okay first shut up, you're definitely getting that raise and second you have got to see that hottie in first class, single and wohoo he is a snack!"

Raising her eyebrow, "Don't you have like a boyfriend Tracy?" She questioned.

"God you are so dense, Kathy he isn't even my type, I was talking about you! You've been single for like 8 years!"

"3 not 8!"

Tracy rolled her eyes in reply, "Whatever you're serving first class today! See you around love! First seat on the right" She said winking at Kathy and moving to the next section.

She would be lying if she said she wasn't  even a least bit interested in checking out this so called handsome single man. She took a deep breath and walked right into the first class section and with a bright smile turned towards the right side, " Good morning and thank you for choosing Blue sky airlines, how can I help you today?" She lifted her eyes and that's when her smile faltered. They were the same brown eyes that had glared right back at her in the morning.

"You- it was you at the bus stop wasn't it? Screaming at me?"squinting at her with his lips pressed

" I-i act-" she stuttered.

" Do you know that I am the CEO  of  Timetrend?"

Wide eyed, her breathing became rapid but she could not speak.

"This is an interesting turn of events" with a smirk on his face.

At this point Kathleen composed herself, "Sir allow me to apologise to you profusely, I truly am very sorry." But let's be honest, they both knew she wasn't.

"Well I guess you can make it up to me by getting a glass of champagne or is that too much for you?"

Biting her lips to prevent her from making the situation worse, She replied, "right away sir."

She cursed Tracy severely in her head. And to make matters even more abominable, there was only one first class passenger. And he was a pain in the ass.

He couldn't believe his bad luck, imagine having the same clumsy woman as your flight attendant. At least here he had an advantage, he could order her around completely although he wasn't actually that cruel. He was having a hard time  trying to control his laughter looking at the flustered girl who was so composed before.

As much as he tried to distract himself, he was extremely bored, he had finished all of his work so that he could spend time with his girlfriend on the flight. Well Ex girlfriend now since she broke up with him yesterday. He was upset sure but not heartbroken. He didn't really love her and she probably didn't either although she tried to but the effort was only one sided. He didn't have time for relationships. He was a busy man after all.

He tried to sleep but he just couldn't. He heard the sound of her heels and guessed that she was making the rounds again. He sat up straight and decided to order another glass of champagne, this was a long flight after all.

" Do you need anything sir? " She questioned, still afraid to meet his eyes.

"Yes, I'm bored."

At this her eyes shot up, with eyebrows raised but she quickly hid it with her normal smile

" Well we have a wide range of movies, if you'd like. We also have mag-"

"No."

"I'm sorry?"

"I mean no, I want to have a conversation. Tell me something about yourself."

" Are you drunk sir?"

" No of course not! Who gets drunk after two glasses of champagne?"

" Well okay, what would you like to know?"

"For starters, tell me your name."

And somehow, to both of their surprise, they were able to keep an interesting flow of conversation going without any awkward silences or anything of the sort and soon they were laughing like old friends. Well actually Kathleen was laughing, the closest David came to laughing was giving her a genuine smile. Soon Kathleen returned to the other attendants for the rounds, returning soon enough to first class, with smirking glances from Tracy.

"Kathleen, might I ask you why did you choose to become an air hostess? You don't have to answer." He added cautiously

"One  call me Kathy, I actually do not like Kathleen at all.

He chuckled slightly taking a sip of his drink

"Two it's not really complicated. I mean I didn't always want to be an attendant. I wanted to  be a pilot. But you know financial issues."

"Oh. Yeah I get that"

There was a comfortable silence between the two before Kathy had to leave again.

"We'll be landing soon, so I'll take your leave." She smiled at him warmly. There was something so innocent about her smile that he couldn't help but smile back.

She got up to get back to her seat with Tracy when a sudden turbulence caused her to stumble forward but before she could hit the floor,a pair of strong hands grabbed her waist and prevented any accident that would end up with her having a huge boil on her head. She felt her heart pound as she looked into his brown eyes slightly converted by his brown hair for what seemed like 10 minutes but was actually 5 seconds? She was being ridiculous! She shook her head and smiled at him,thanking him and went on her way avoiding eye contact.

-----

He really couldn't help but smile at her and he was pretty astonished about himself. They were getting ready to descend, when there was a slight tremor and he realized that it had completely shooken Kathy and she would probably fall down but before that he grabbed her firmly by the waist and immediately stood up. He didn't know what happened but something in her blue eyes pulled him towards her. He saw a strand of her glossy red hair on her soft pink cheeks, he was having  a hard time fighting the urge to tuck it behind her ear. He didn't even register the fact that he was staring at her before she blushed and pulled away. For the first time in his life, he felt flustered at the sight of her. He probably was just tired. Hopefully.

#love #angst #romance #chicklit #original #fiction