#there's am actual psychologist on the ship

[rayfishandchips]

Random sad thoughts on rodrift

may be unpopular opinion. Ok so I think Rodrift has more angst potential than happy ending potential. I came for best friends to lovers fluff, but after I got into it I know it's angst material. The fix-it's just don't hit as hard as the angst.

I'm feeling complicated feelings for this bc I really liked their dynamics when I started mtmte. Deep down my selfish desires want to see a happy friends-to-lovers ending for them. Now after finishing mtmte and a bunch of other idw drift stuff, it's clear the narrative prescribes angst to them.

Early mtmte Drift is lost. His ultimate need throughout his life is a faith, and religion/Rodimus is not good enough a solution, not in the long term and not for him. Rodimus in that era is not much better, he is insecure behind his bluff, and launched the grand crusade for the knights because he (and the tfs that followed him) cannot face the post-war world. Drift supports him which makes him feel better, but Drift is not the long-term solution too.

While these two can have happy moments with each other, ultimately it can't be healthy endgame because deep down, neither are suitable for helping out the other. In the case of a true end, best they can really do is besties.

The Lost Light is a ship that seek a purpose it will never find, and the meaning of the voyage is not the end but the process of going far away. In the end JR gave us the alternative to finding salvation in ideals, which is the salvation of the present. The adventure is meant to end and it's meant to make our hearts sore. Thanks JR it's beautiful and sad and happy at the same time, it's so well written I can't even find comfort in fix-its.

To be honest no one on the Lost Light is mentally sane enough for sappy romantic stuff. Everyone has baggage, no one walks away unscathed, they just find ways to cope and walk on. This is (personal opinion) the best message to end a non-fairytale story with.

May post later on why I support dratchet endgame out of the 4 important figures in Drift's life (and why wingdrift is still somewhat possible). The ending of Rodimus hurts a bit too much I don't think I can face it yet, but maybe sometime later.

Still I love seeing them as friends. While not endgame, they still provided each other with much needed remedy during lost times, and that deserves appreciation too. Thanks to fanfics sometimes we can just imagine the jouney never ends and they are just happy silly besties sharing the most epic adventure. Sometimes I betray canon for self-indulgent reasons haha

Also, for those who reached this point, thanks for reading all of this :)

[weeb-cheese]

I’ve been seeing a lot of discussion about how harmful and self destructive the “anti” philosophy is. And it’s actually really interesting in a morbid curiosity and fandom history kind of way. I’ve even seen people doing like full on academic research about it.

[badaziraphaletakes]

these people do not understand abuse. y’all abuse is NOT making mistakes. either they have never been in an abusive relationship or have awful media comprehension skills. I watched the entire show with my mom (who is a licensed psychologist and has worked with abusive relationships since the start of her career) and we analysed the show (because she was also an English teacher) and that never came up. what are these people on

Oh, my goodness, thank you so much for sharing, @z1ish ! I am so happy to hear that a psychologist is saying the same thing we've been saying! :))))

So, then, let's get into it...

I sure as hell hope that somewhere deep down OP realizes Aziraphale isn't actually ab*sive and that they are just grasping at straws, because otherwise they should know perfectly well that there WOULD be no way for the writers to make it all come out right in the end with Aziracrow together. If you think Aziraphale is ab*sive (or whatever TF "borders on ab*sive" is supposed to mean, which, by the way, that's a whole thing in itself - ab*se is ab*se, period, and the suffering of victims is degraded by that kind of language, so if you're trying to say it's ab*sive, then you need to either piss or get off the pot) you shouldn't ship Aziracrow, and - I'm just gonna come right out and say this - you shouldn't be supporting this show in the first place, because this show ships Aziracrow.

If I thought for one SECOND that this show was glorifying an ab*sive relationship, underscoring it with beautiful music and pretty lighting and yada yada, then no power in heaven or hell could make me support it or give it one cent of my time or money. This is doubly so since we know that the couple is going to end up together and it's going to be portrayed as a good thing.

And frankly, I profoundly resent people misinterpreting my perspective on Good Omens as that. Not to mention it's the rankest hypocrisy for that to be coming (as I can only assume it is) from the subset of the fandom that is hell-bent (heh) on minimizing, if not outright denying, Heaven's ab*se of Aziraphale.

Also, the phrase "it's what victims tell themselves so they 'can' rationalize away the bad behavior" is highly, highly problematic. It veers veeery close to implying that the problem is with the victims who think that way - that victims are somehow enabling themselves to remain victims (when I hope we all know the problem is with OTHER PEOPLE - the ab*sers, the enablers in their circle, the broader society - who tell them things like that to try to keep them imprisoned. If we're going to make judgmental statements like "they're rationalizing away the bad behavior", we should make them about the ab*sers, not the victims).

Finally: I got slight vibes of "I stopped thinking about my ab*ser this way, so you should too!" from OP. That bothers me a LOT.

Many victims can't leave. For such people, thinking that way about their ab*ser is often a survival mechanism. A way to keep going. After all, if you allowed yourself to think about how horrible things really were, it would destroy you. It's not always about "rationalizing away bad behavior". Again I say, WE CANNOT CRITICIZE VICTIMS FOR HOW THEY THINK ABOUT THEIR AB*SERS. IT'S NOT OKAY!

To any victims out there who aren't able to leave: I hope and pray that someday you get to be free and safe. Until then, think whatever you need to to get by. I'll never judge you for it.

Whew. Sorry this got dark. But OP is playing with fire here. This one really, really pissed me off.

(EDITED TO ADD: This one is from before the NG thing broke. Yes, we really are that behind on our backlog, lol.)

[zenny-zenzen]

☮️💎Cherusa Boopuda💎☮️

Age: 16 (1999, DIU), 18 (2001, GW), 28 (2011, SO)

Gender: Cisgender Female

Birthday: May 5th, 1983

Height: 5 ft 1 inch (155 cm)

Weight: 47 kg (104 lbs)

Sexuality: Bisexual

Occupation: 1st year student (1999), 3rd year student (2001), Psychologist affiliated with the SPW Foundation (2011)

Birthplace: Yaoundé (Cameroon, West Africa)

Nationality: Cameroonian

Citizenship: Japanese --------------------------------------------------

I do OC x Canon and ship her with Josuke Higashikata💎🌟(Ship name-> JosuCheru)

--------------------------------------------------

Stand: Let's Groove

Cherusa's Stand, Let's Groove, can slow down any living creature's movements in an interval that goes from 5 to 10 minutes, and if she uses her Stand's full powers she can completely freeze their movements in an interval of 10 minutes but that will result into her feeling exhausted. While when it comes to objects, Cherusa can either slow them down when they are moving, or directly freeze them in an interval of time that goes from 5 to 10 seconds without any repercussions to her energy as they aren't living beings. Mastery Cherusa shows to be extremely creative with the use of Let's Groove, which is very fitting of her personality and linked to her artsy hobby that requires tons of immagination. Let's Groove's precision is enhanced by Cherusa's great attention to details, a trait Jotaro had catched on and helped her refine.

Stand cry: "GROOVY" Power: B Speed: C Range: C Durability: D Precision: B Potential: B -------------------------------------------------- NEW (MODIFIED) REFERENCE SHEET (AGAIN - I'M SORRY/lh) + LET'S GROOVE'S SLIGHT DESIGN CHANGE‼️ Which means i am reuploading everything but this time i'll keep it into one post, without any extra reblogs for people to have Cherusa's essential information directly and manage to modify it if i ever decide to change anything about it in the future since Tumblr doesn't let you modify reblogs🙏 Meanwhile here is:

My toyhouse‼️

So that you can check out Cherusa's complete and detailed info! (It's just like an actual JoJo Wiki site! Which means it includes her role, her backstory, her dynamics with other DIU characters etc...)

Along with

My Instagram!!-> cherushii._

The social where i have been the most active for 3-ish years since i started OCxCanon and have my base at in case you are interested in frequent Cherusa/Josucheru content updates along with the fact you can interact with me more easily! I sincerely look foward to making more mutuals and friends!💖 --------------------------------------------------

And lastly! Just like in the old repost(s), you get a Christmas themed illustration I've done by recreating DIU animator Kohei Ashiya's artstyle completely from scratch‼️💕

[kotelok16]

Hii so I’m new here and haven’t touched danganronpa in years, so I’m just curious as to what got you into komamiki? My mind is blown whenever I see a ship that’s not implied in canon, so seeing your art was like woah!!!! And I just like getting people to infodump about stuff they love 💕

Thanks a lot for the question, anon! This is gonna be a long post, be prepared

In fact, I remember very poorly the moment when I got involved in this pairing. As I understand it, I saw one piece of art and just fell in love with this couple? That is, my brain clicked and was like, "Listen, I like it, there's something in this!"

If you still asking "why" I liked this pairing, then the main reason is an interesting dynamic. Yes, yes, komamiki haters, I know about the ending of the third trial and that these two "hate each other" (as they usually write). But... Isn't there a special charm in this? Has the path from hate to love stopped being a thing? I mean, at the end of the trial, it was shown how well Mikan caught Nagito's weakness. She could have left him speechless with a precise phrase. She understood Nagito.

Isn't there some spice in the fact that you are best understood by the person you dislike now? And everyone you admire didn't even try to understand you?? (yes, Hajime tried in free-time events. I know, I don't deny it. Just for now we are talking about the main plot).

Of course, I can think too much like any other fan of any other pairing. But this dynamic is driving me crazy!

It gives me pleasure to reflect on how difficult it would be for komamiki to restore a neutral relationship to begin with after the events of the game. And it's going to be difficult, as it's going to be difficult for all the killers and victims to talk about what happened, you know? And the difficulties are ✨interesting✨.

What I also like about komamiki is that they are two broken people who can understand each other. They both need psychological (and not only) help, okay?? But in this path of recovery, they can become each other's support.

Mikan is emotional, reads the general atmosphere and someone else's mood very easily, worries a lot. Nagito is actually more detached and calm (unless we're talking about hope-). He knows how to show the emotions needed at the moment, but he does not always read the general atmosphere (and does not always consider it necessary, he is on his own mind). In total, we have two broken people, one is very emotional and reads people well, and the second is calm, which adjusts to the mood of people. And both have low self-esteem and are very, let's call it, helpful. "I will do anything, just don't hate me!" and "I will do everything to become your stepping stone to hope!"

At the same time, they can learn a lot from each other and take care of each other. Mikan, of course, as a nurse. I like to think too much that she put all her strength into Nagito's life after him waking up from the New World Program. Komaeda, in turn, is sharp-tongued, and can protect his emotional girlfriend from unwanted comments verbally. He also knows how to express admiration, I think such words won't hurt Mikan. Tsumiki can also express in words and actions the importance of Nagito's life to her. Uh, a mutual aid circle??

Will such a relationship be difficult? OF COURSE, absolutely. But do you really think that any relationship does not involve difficulties? Including healthy relationships, which are being talked about a lot now? Like, guys, psychologists identify the crisis stages that ANY married couple goes through. The question is not what kind of problems are in the relationship, but how they will be solved. But I got off the subject.

If I think again about the post-canon, then I am hooked by the idea that the Class 77 will become the world's enemy. Not without reason, let's be honest. But, you see, there is no one left in their world who would accept them, except classmates (no, Makoto, don't look at me like that-). "In this world, we only have each other." Isn't this a bit dramatic, tragic and romantic?! (tragic for the most part, but we love it here)

Uh, I think this post is already quite long, it's worth taking stock. I love komamiki, I see an interesting, complex dynamic between them. Most of the time I draw them cute, gentle, romantic, well, because I like to draw them like that. I'm interested in thinking about their relationship, but drawing all sorts of cute things gives me peace of mind. Thanks again for the question, anon! It's always a joy to talk about your favorite couple^^

[iameks]

Am I the only one that is not happy on how things are going for Tim and Lucy?

I mean don't get me wrong, I know Tim is dealing with a lot of things right now, but honestly I'm not a fan of this break up thing.

And it's not because I ship them so I just want them to be happy and in love, I mean maybe in part yes but let's be realistic every couple has its ups and downs so it's normal they fight, that there are moments of tension, that's all legit, but for me personally a break up it's something that has no back turns.

I don't see the "getting back with your ex" as something anyone should do, cause there's a reason if y'all broke up no? So why wanting back something that wasn't working?

I know there are actually reasons as to why Tim decided to break up with Lucy and the psychologist pointed things out etc, but to be truthful with you all i would have preferred seeing Tim still fighting for his relationship while going through hell.

Idk probably I don't really know how to explain my thoughts, but I think that true love or whatever you wanna call it is going through rough paths together and not shutting your partner out completely after a traumatic experience, then working on yourself alone and then going back to your partner.

So yeah, as much as I know that all of this will lead to a stronger bond and relationship between them in the future I'm still not a fan of how things are being done.

[glitterguts13]

How would the HSR men react to Caelus going through Post-Parteum Depression (i.e. finding him stressed out, holding a pillow standing by the crib or by the kettle?)

In the mood for angst.

I too, am in the mood for angst. Please remember everyone, postpartum depression is a very real, very serious issue and if you think someone you know might be suffering with it, get them help any way you can! Also this was so long I'm going to have to do a part 2, and maybe a part 3-

TW: Topics of depression, self-harm (detailed), suicidal ideation, binge drinking, and intrusive thoughts about harming a child (no children are actually hurt) Please do NOT read on if these topics are triggering!!

Argenti "My love?" waking in the middle of the night to find Caelus missing from his side, Argenti quickly shuffled off to the nursery. A large silhouette is shadowed over their sleeping babe's crib, an odd stillness filling the dark room. "My love, are you alright?" moving forward, Argenti lays a hand to Caelus' shoulder. "No." voice strained, throat closing, Caelus grips the edge of the crib tighter. "Darling, what's wrong-" "Everything!" the force of his shout startles Argenti back a step, "Everything is wrong!" tears spill down Caelus' pale face, "I don't...I don't feel anything! I don't...love her. I'm her mother, and I don't love her..." covering his face with his trembling hands, Caelus sinks to his knees, sobbing, "It isn't supposed to be like this, it's wrong! I-I'm like her-my 'mother' I'm...like her, aren't I?" kneeling down in front of the young man, Argenti pulls him close, "Darling...why didn't you say something sooner...we'll figure this out, alright?" he pulls back, cupping his lover's face in his hands, "You're nothing like that woman...please...don't compare yourself to her."

Arlan The sound of metal crashing to the floor and the screaming of their infant son sends Arlan skittering into the kitchen. "Get him out of here!" there's a mixture of rage and panic stirring in Caelus voice, tears brimming his eyes as a red hot pan with the remnants of dinner was scattered over the floor. Arlan doesn't question, snatching their baby from his bassinet. He quickly looks him over, content to see no visible injuries, and settles him into his crib before returning to Caelus. "What happened." Still standing over the stove, completely still, Caelus sucks in a shuttered breath, "I-I don't know-I just...I wanted to hurt him-" he turns, tears dripping down his cheeks, "I don't want to hurt him-I had the pan in my hands and I-I threw it, I was going to do something bad-Arlan, I'm sorry-" pulling him into a hug, Arlan tightens his grip, "We're going to see one of the ship's psychologists, ok? We're going to get you help."

Aventurine (TW: Self Harm) He should have seen the signs, guilt creeping up his spine as Caelus yelped in shock. Long, angry red lines weeping blood run up the course of his thighs, broken razer still in his shaking hands. Without thinking, the blonde grabs it from his lover's hands, yanking it away by the blade and slicing his plan open as he does so. "Aven-" "What the fuck are you doing?" there rage tinting his tone being spurred on by the sheer terror in his gut, "Caelus, those are so deep, you have a fucking artery there-" of course Aventurine knows, he knows too well. "I-I-" the words are dead on his tongue, tears falling down his cheeks, "I don't feel anything. I don't feel anything at all, and I'm scared." a chill rushes down Aventurine's spine, eyes going wide. How did he miss all the signs? Why did it take till now? Grabbing a towel and pressing it to the worst of the wounds, he pulls his cell phone from his back pocket. "I'm calling for help. I'm going to get you help...just...don't do this again, for the love of all that's holy don't do this again."

Blade The glint of the blade catches his eye before anything else. Reflexes kicking in, fingers curling around Caelus' wrist and wrenching the object from his grasp. "Don't hold shit like this near her-" he stops, eyes narrowing. No, Caelus would never- Why though? Why was he holding a knife while looking over their child's crib? No, he would never- "I'm sorry," hallow and unfeeling, the words almost cause Blade to feel frightened, "I...I thought...was if...she was like you...can she die?" all at once, as if the trance was broken, Caelus jerks back from the crib. "Aeons, why...why was I thinking that? Blade- Blade, I-I don't know what happened-" placing the sharp object aside, he lays a hand to the man's shoulder. "Leave him to me...I think you should speak with the other Nameless, they...might be able to help more than I can, but for now, I think it's best you leave."

Boothill (TW: Suicide attempt)

The gut-wrenching scream that comes from Caelus almost makes the cyborg feel some phantom sense of nausea in his non-existent stomach. The rope was tied, he was seconds away from disaster and Caelus was a heap on the floor, screaming. "Why did you stop me?!" he sobs, "I can't do it-I can't do it anymore, I just wanna make it stop!" "Get ahold of yerself!" Boothill grabs his shoulder, giving him a shake, "What the hell are ya thinking?! Ya wanna leave yer daughter without a mother-" he regrets the harshness of his words as soon as they pass over his lips, the desperate sound leaving Caelus only sending another wave of terror down the back of his neck. "She doesn't need me!" he sobs, "I'm a horrible mother...I don't feel anything when I hold her...I'm a monster..." "That...ain't true...." Boothill looks around, desperate for a fix to this problem, "Just...stop strugglin..I...I'll call someone, I'll find help for ya just...stay with me."

Dan Heng/Lunae "Caelus, what are you doing?" he swears up and down his eyes are deceiving him, "Turn around, look at me." Caelus doesn't move, pillow clutched against his chest, tears dripping from his face and into the crib below him. "Caelus, you have to talk to me, I can't help if I don't know what's wrong." he steps closer, gently pulling his lover away from the crib. "I don't know whats wrong," he whispers back, "I'm...I'm thinking thinks...bad things..." Swallowing thickly, Dan Heng nods, "Thank you for being honest...a lot of mother's go through this. It isn't just you." of course he'd read about such things, but never had he expected to be faced with the reality of it. "I'm a horrible mother, I don't deserve...any of this..." Holding his face, Dan Heng rests his forehead against Caelus, "The Herta Space Station has some of the medics around, we'll go visit them right away and find out how to help you."

Dr. Ratio The signs had been there, he's spotted them instantly, but there was an irrational part of his logical brain that told him, wait. Maybe it was nothing, observing how things happen was second nature to the man after all. "Caelus, we need to speak with something about your recent behavior." the cold, clinical way he speaks causes the young man to jolt from his spot on the sofa. "What are you talking about-I haven't done anything!" "Precisely my point," Ratio says, "You haven't been feeding our son, you haven't bathed him once, you only hold him when I tell you-" "Don't analyze me like I'm one of your test subjects-" the pure venom in the Trailblaizer's voice knocked Ratio's confident personal off ever so slightly. "Caelus, that wasn't my intention. I simply believe I've observed concerning signs of postpartum depression-" "Well maybe instead of observing you could have helped me!" the pain lacing that statement makes Ratio feel ill.

Gallagher There's a trail of empty wine bottles leading from the kitchen to the bedroom, shattered glass covering the floors and red strains splattered over the walls. The sound of a baby crying out in hunger catches his ears before the echos of defeated sobs. "Caelus what the hell-" Curled up on the floor in front of their child's crib, Caelus clutched a half-empty bottle of wine to his chest, sobbing into the carpeted floor. "Make it stop...just...make it stop crying...please....Gallagher it never stops...nothing I do is good enough-" Hiccuping, Caelus curls further in on himself, sobbing harder as their newborn wails louder. "Ok, alright, kiddo, come'er-" Gallagher takes the baby into his arms before stepping right outside the nursery, phone in hand, "Hey," he swallows thickly, "Siobhan? Yeah, I need a favor- No, close the bar and come by my place right now. I'll explain later just, get here, fast."

Gepard Stepping into the bathroom, Gepard's heart sinks. "Caelus- What's happening?" it's cold, nearly freezing in the tiny apartment bathroom. Their child is nestled on a bed of blankets and towels, wrapped snuggly and just within view of the bathtub. Caelus, however, was sitting in a pool of ice-cold water, fully dressed and shivering violently. "Caelus, you're going to catch Pnemona, get out of there right now." taking their child from the floor, Gepard is relieved to see them perfectly unharmed and sleeping peacefully. Caelus, however, doesn't respond, only turning his head away. "Caelus-" "Go. Away." Gepard moves closer, reaching into the freezing water and pulling the plug to the drain. "Caelus, tell me what's going on-" "If I don't do something, I'm going to go insane!" nearly snarling at the blonde, Caelus drags his fingers through his damp hair, "I just...I needed to feel something, anything! This was the only thing I could think to do and...it...didn't help..." he trails off, soft, defeated, looking up at Gepard with wide, tear-filled eyes. "Caelus, get out of the tub, change and dry off. I'm going to call Serval, maybe....maybe she can tell help..." unsure and confused, Gepard steps away, brows knitting in concern.

[crazyhickofftheirrocker]

my opinion of you is that i haven’t followed you for long but i find ur observations smart & interesting. especially about corrie so actually this is a double ask (if you want) what are your top 5 headcanons and or unpopular opinions about the ship? you can also do the individual characters if you want

Well this was delightful to find in my inbox, thank you 🥰 always here for a ramble about corrie!

This could be tricky, but oh well , I'll give it a go. I'm not typically very off the wall in my opinions on Coronation Street so this will be a mix.

Top 5 headcanons/unpopular opinions of the Swarla ship.

1. I am a proponent of the "Lisa fell first, but Carla fell harder" school of thought. Swain knew what was going on but wrote the whole thing off as a statistical improbability (plus *coughs* low self-esteem and unprocessed grief*) right up until she suddenly didn't get dressed. And we all saw the panicked mess that replaced Carla Connor for a couple of weeks there. She was 95% hearteyes and it was just too much.

2. This one comes after Monday 13th Jan and is very much a HC. As well as the little toy sports car, Carla acquired a toy police car that's hiding out of sight that she got as a gag gift for Lisa (and also maybe herself cause god she is silly over this pocket rocket of a police detective) But then Lisa mentioned how Betsy can get triggered by them in general sometimes and then Carla insists on putting it away in a drawer but she can't bring herself to return it cause it makes her smile every time she looks at it and thinks of Lisa.

("Carla, you do know I don't actually drive one of those, right?" "I know, but come on, it's a tiny cop car! You're practically the same size if I squint!")

3. Despite how nice it would be to see it, I don't think there should be a Swarla wedding in 2025. Even though they've sped ran a few of the major relationship milestones and are going at a pace that could conceivably see that happening in the current schedule, for this once, they should scrap the usual timeline of convenience and actually have them all deal with their respective traumas cause frankly, they could use a team of psychologists to help sort them out, never mind one therapist. It'd certainly make the show more interesting.

4. HC #2 Carla may or may not have bought a sneaky third festival ticket on the off chance that things worked out well enough for her and now that she's seen drunk!Lisa sing, she CANNOT miss the opportunity to see her waving her hands in the air like she just doesn't care- and honestly, neither can I 😂

5. HC #3 Lisa briefly entertained the idea of joining the Roads Policing Unit but after getting into a motorbike crash during training (and having not-yet-gf-or-wife Becky tear strips out of her for picking something so high-risk in the first place) Lisa decides to switch to CID instead. But the silver lining was that this dyke banned from a bike happened to gain a girlfriend out of the experience when Becky decided to look after her while she was out of commission.

[infoglitch]

This..

Ok hold on the fuck is with the fuckin tags?

Ok then... Guess I'm pissing off even more people.

Let's talk about gravecest and why I like it despite my... Apprehension to other taboo ships.

First of all hello tcoaal community, I'm glitch, and this is the only time I will ever talk about gravecest and the only time you shall ever hear from my blog.

Ok to begin I need to state something. So I as shipper trash don't.. normally enjoy incest ships (I usually jokingly call it heresy but eh) I understand it obviously is just a ship and clearly not meant for me.

Yet here I am talking about a ship from a game who multiple antis claim is not ok due to the incest... Despite the fact this has our main characters commit cannibalism and murder.. also working with demons (which the latter isn't really against a law but still)

But my gripes with antis aside. I enjoy gravecest, but is less from me being shipper trash and more due to the fact that in the narrative.. it makes sense.

I am someone who mainly ships things that are being pushed by the story and dear god does gravecest get pushed HARD.

From the small lines such as Andrew imagining if him and Ashley did jump together in a joint suicide then both their corpses would be mangled messes to the point they couldn't be separated. To the dream sequence where we see the aftermath of what was definitely Andrew blowing out Ashley's back.

These two are essentially meant for eachother.. due to their horrible circumstances, Andrew practically being forced to raise Ashley once she's born, add that on with his and Ashley's parents not being prepared to raise them and only having Andrew because their mom got knocked up before she was even 30. Then only to have their parents leave them to basically die as they live their life with just the two of them.

Andrew and Ashley are who they are due to the absence of actually responsible parents. Due to Andrew being the only real source of consistent affection for Ashley she essentially becomes dependent and partly obsessive over him (like not the over romanticized yandere type of shit but more of the fact Ashley is constantly wanting to make sure Andrew is RIGHT THERE by her) and this unfortunately lead to Ashley getting rid of anyone that might steal Andrew from her... Or more accurately, steal Andy from her. Id go into why this is so important but... I'm not in deep enough to get full-on psychologist for these characters.

But due to Ashley's nearly sociopathic tendencies this lead to Andrew becoming the man he is now. Andrew currently has gotten to the point he feels.. well he feels love towards Ashley, and not familial love.

He WANTS her but Andrew is also someone who was taught that "these feelings are wrong, this is NOT OK" which they aren't ok, obviously but regardless he still feels them and the longer Ashley is around him and pushing his buttons, those feelings are only going to intensify. And eventually it will boil over.

But obviously Andrew despite his horrible family isn't faultless. He is growing overly protective of Ashley and to the point he's killed someone to ensure she is safe, he has done a lot of terrible things currently

The story has set these characters so they have no ability to find connection with others and at this point they probably don't want to. They are written to be stuck together yet also to be toxic to each other because well, they are, Andrew Is extremely overbearing, extremely possessive and is potentially quick to anger. Ashley is just a sociopath who got treat as if she was pure evil and now she's a manipulative and equally possessive woman. Their toxic for each other but they have no one else to trust.

The narrative has essentially made it so these two are the ones who will bring about each others end because their terrible for each but yet still love eachother.

To me this isn't saying "incest is cool" or any shit the antis are saying, it's saying "this is what happens when some people are just met with bad situation after bad situation."

But I've just been rambling and making no sense. and I will refuse to elaborate or fix this.. because I am very tired.

But in short for this meaningless post.. I am gravecest trash.

[destructivisms]

hi!! i found out you accept ship requests so i decided to send one. i'd like to know about the ship and who would be my best friend if possible 🫶 i'll be ok with any character from the show.

i'm a bi woman, with dark red hair and black eyes. i have a lot of tattoos and piercings on my nose and lip. i mostly dress classic, since i work as a psychologist. i graduated from university a couple of years ago, and since then, i've been working in a clinic with children with autism. my first language is russian.

in my free time, i draw! i have a blog dedicated to fanarts, and i also draw comms. i'm a huge bookworm, i love reading classics and modern prose the most, i have a tiktok acc about books in russ, i mainly talk about my favorite writers (aka nabokov and dostoevsky). when i was in high school, i won a competition for the best poem. i am not a fan of fantasy, but i have a tattoo with a dragon in honor of a song of ice and fire by grrm (i adore this book series).

i am not a very social person. I have a few friends, but i like spending time alone more. when i was a child, i really loved Harry Potter and always dreamed of being a ravenclaw, but all the tests put me in slytherin😭.

i am intj and a gemini (although i dont believe in astrology). now i am very busy with work, but i try to study always and improve my english and maybe even start learning spanish. i hope i sent enough information.

thank you very much!! 🤍🤍🤍

hello hello!! thank you for sending this one in (love how my ship requests attract fellow multilingual baddies lmao), hope you like it 🫶

I ship you with...

KIMIKO

the two coolest gals in the entire world actually.

You two meet at a coffee shop. It's a lazy afternoon, you're taking your time at a table in the corner with your drink and pastry of choice. But the main reason you're there is to draw — you decide to practice in a different environment, so observational drawing it is. It's been a while since you arrived, you've sketched a few faces of people passing by, objects, the refractions of light coming in through the window.

Your eyes search around for the next subject and then you see her — the woman who just sat down with a cup of tea and a piece of cake. She's got a little smile on as the guy by her side mutters a string of complaints about how this soggy atrocity can't even be called a real croissant. You draw them both for a while, but you really fixate on her; the myriad gestures and strong expressions she replies to him with are so interesting to try and replicate. And she's very cute.

You're so immersed in drawing her, you're caught by surprise when you lift your eyes from the sketch and she's looking back at you with a smile. Caught red-handed!

She approaches you, typing something in her phone, and when she shows you the screen she wants to see the drawings. She lights up with the sketch page and starts typing a string of compliments on her phone (you're already smiling too, at that point). She then asks for your pen to scribble something in the corner. Her friend then calls her and she waves goodbye and you know that cute smile will stay in your head forever.

When you look back at the sketch, you see she wrote down her name — KIMIKO, in block letters — and her number.

Your first text to her is a picture of the drawings — a sketch page filled with her various expressions. Crude sketches, gesture drawing and facial expressions practice mostly, but in her replies she's amazed. She asks to see more of your art and you send her the link to your blog!!

And that, my friend, is how Kimiko becomes your No. 1 fan

You two start chatting a lot, like, A LOT (you don't know this from your side of the conversation, but Frenchie sees her giggling at the screen and asks what is it, and Butcher is constantly telling her to put down the goddamn phone. Kimiko finds out she really likes texting)

(and she really likes you too)

It takes a while for you to see each other again, but by the time you do meet you're already "pen pals" (text pals?) and friends.

This time, you plan to go together to a street fair — it's your first in-person encounter with Kimiko in around a month, and you're friends now, so why are you nervous...?

Oh my God it's a date

Not that any of you make it explicit, but it is SO a date

You spend a wonderful day listening to live music, tasting good food, looking at the vendors and chatting. Kimiko might be non-verbal but those fingers can TYPE — she's incredibly lively, with a wide smile, and to be fair she's the one that does most of the "talking" in the conversation.

Also because she feels so comfortable with you, and how you navigate the conversation. You never make her feel like she's slowing things down by typing or seem less interested in what she has to say.

There's one specific vendor in the fair that's a stand for used books, and you use it as a prerogative to talk away about your love for classics (she ends up buying a book you recommend — insert here the Russian classic you'd recommend to her).

After that? It's a date and EVERYONE knows it.

Frenchie tells her all the time to make a move and invite you to another one. He thought you seemed nice (saw you once) and already shipped you both (read a single text). But he sees how Kimiko acts when texting you and talking to you — C'est l'amour, mon coeur, need I say more?

You go on a series of dates after that, each one more explicitly romantic than the previous one, until your connection eases into a relationship without you even noticing. It's just so natural to be with her.

The word "girlfriend" is first used, though, when Kimiko introduces you to THE BOYS. That's the main aspect of her life, and even though she'd like to protect you, fighting is the only way she knows how to — her family has to know you too. So Kimiko, smiling by your side, types Everyone, this is my girlfriend.

She often likes watching you draw — the expression of concentration on your face as you pour your heart into a piece. There's something really special to her about making art, Kimiko herself loves little crafts and probably picks up drawing because of you.

Both of you definitely have silent hang outs in which you do your art or read books, listen to music, have a good drink of coffee/tea and chill together.

You immediately melt, of course. It's official. And now you have this bunch of dudes who will also protect you (because lord knows what Kimiko would do if they didn't).

Getting introduced to the team, then, brings you to a great friendship with...

MARVIN "M.M." MILK

braincells of the team duo!

Not gonna lie, I was torn between M.M. and Kimiko for the ship, but the more I thought about it the more I liked your friendship.

You get to know him when Kimiko introduces him to The Boys, but he already knew about you — all of them did — just by how much she texted you. All the time.

And when he meets you, he's so pleasantly surprised by how much of a good influence you are — not that he thought ill of you, it's just that in that world they've all learned to suspect anyone.

But M.M. vibes with you from the start: your level-headedness and drive don't manifest through coldness, but rather are something that he can connect with. You're as logical and practical as him.

Also I imagine your work as a psychologist gives you a mental tool set to de-escalate conflict, ground people, and get to the root of the problem, that he really appreciates. As the member of the team that's trying to keep them together and do the right thing, you're someone M.M. would love to have by his side.

You're not officially a part of The Boys, but M.M. soon starts going to you as a sort of advisor and friend — sometimes he needs someone to remind him of the right path to take, or simply a friendly shoulder to hear about all the shit he has to put up with because of these guys.

(Also, since the show implies Janine might also have OCD, or is dealing with anger issues in general, he absolutely goes to you for advice)

But enough about your profession, he also gets book recommendations from you (who wouldn't, you're so cool).

I loved @ brynnterpretations's hc that M.M. has Goodreads clout so I am absolutely incorporating it to say he boosts your book TikTok there, even though he does not speak Russian.

All in all, you've got yourself really good people by your side :)

[justalilpearlie]

Introduction/Fun Pearlie Facts

Was abt time I did one of these.

Hello everyone, my name is Pearl, Pearlie or Sam/Sammy if you're feeling like it. Friends also call me Martini sometimes.

I am a minor, my labels... we dont talk about them (fem presenting ftm gay/mlm + trying out gendervoid and verinix + bigender??) uhmm and I go by He/She, tho mostly He/Him by strangers- I can She/Her myself and close friends/mutuals are allowed! (I also go by neos: Void/Moon/Sweet/It/Fluff/Love/Fizz/Paw)

I'm from Argentina, born and raised, never moved. Speak fluent english and spanish.

I got the 'tism and the adhd, aswell as BPD and a few other things I wont list right now! But yeah I'm psychotic (ooo scary word.. lmao)

- -🌄-📀-🌙- -💚- -💛- -✨-🌄-✨- -💛- -💚- -🌙-📀-🌄- -

I'm an IRL of many, mainly c!Pearl (mcyt), Samuel Emily (fnaf [games canon]) and Shin Tsukimi (yttd). If you don't like it you can leave, block me, or whatever, cause you aint gonna change my life or how I am. I'm in therapy, which unlike random hate and harrassment online, does help me :)

I like to roleplay, draw, sometimes make playlists or moodboards.. And my biggest interests right now are Life Series (+ evo + new life), Empires1(+ a bit of e2) and FNaF! (i dont rlly like the books tho lol..)

I use kin tags for reach cause I'd love interaction from any fellow lifers or empires ppl, hermits aswell!! Tho I havent finished s8 or s9 yet...

Fictionkins, therians and traumagenic systems all welcome!

- -💥-🐺-🌙- -❤️- -💛- -✨-💥-✨- -💛- -❤️- -🌙-🐺-💥- -

DNI prefferably:

- Basic DNI criteria (proshippers, homophobes, transphobes, racists, TERFs, ableist, etc)

- Endos/non-traumagenic "systems" DNI. block me if u want, i wont argue abt it in the comments/reblogs. or interact if u want but im not gonna follow u back or anythin shrugs.

- reality checkers or anti-IRLs DNI. I aint "romanticizing" shit, I'm existing and living my life, if thats a problem to you too bad cause my psychologist aproves of what I'm doing, since I aint harming anyone and I myself am doing dandy.

- anti-kin also DNI cause most of my friends are fictionkins and if you talk shit abt my fellas idk i wouldnt like having u around much

CCs interact at your own risk. This is my domain, cyan man & moon lady. /hj

- -🪸-🐸-🌙- -💙- -🩵- -✨-🪸-✨- -🩵- -💙- -🌙-🐸-🪸- -

"Disclaimer"

- I talk about MajorMoon (Scott x Pearl) a LOT, if u didnt notice by the acc theme. These are my romantic memories, its a gay ship, not woman/gay man, so if it makes u uncomfortable or u hate it or whatever then ur probably not gonna like my content lmao. COUGH, consider joining us if you do like what you see... /nf We're a small comunity of supporters.. just me.. and a few of my peeps... that was a joke, sir. /ref

- This isn't roleplay, its my main acc where im ""unapologetically"" myself, but if u do wanna rp life series/empires u can always shoot me a dm and maybe I'll give u my discord.

- I talk about myself (c!Pearl) using 3rd person in many posts tagged with main fandom tags. This is to cause less confusion to casual fans slash ""normies"" (lhj) that well.. don't know what IRLs are! Also that way I feel safer and don't have to worry as much abt getting harassed and such for my identity.

- -🌸-⛰️-🌙- -💚- -💙- -✨-🌸-✨- -💙- -💚- -🌙-⛰️-🌸- -

Special People Mentions!! fps = * (1 or more.. wouldnt say in a priority sorta order but. more or less yea)

Family! <3 🌼@pehpurr* SISTER!! super duper cool, her art is great and you should check it out!! YOU. You're the brightest little girl (i say like ur not older than me) I'VE EVER MET ACTUALLY! You're so passionate and loving I freaking adore you!! I love you so much Scar, you're one of the best things to ever happen to me, Kanny &lt;3 ⚙️@gentlexmadman DAD!! you are my daaaad, you're my dad! woogie woogie woogie! ANOTHER amazing artist! mr "I know that guy-", very funny, Henry "Autism" Emily... the copper king, my father. Speaking to you is always comforting. Love you so much papa, you're amazing :)

Simply special <3 ☕@insomniac-coffeehouse** You're all simply so very special to me. I love spending time with you guys and playing stuff together, you mean a lot to me and I'm so glad I met you. I hope we're still close for this year and many more! You're incredibly talented, not only at art, at everything you do. You spark joy in my brain and my heart <3 From the bottom of my heart, I'm in love with the hope you bring to this world. 🍊Jack***, oh my dear Jacky, where do I even begin, sport... you really are my other half. Mi media naranja if you will. haha.. I love every second we spend together, I love your voice, I love your eyes, I love your smile, your laughter. I love your use of words, the way you speak, your humor, your seriousness and goofiness. You stiff fuck, you were made for me and I was made for you, and I wouldn't have it any other way. You're my everything, mi vida, mi luz, mi estrella. Mi amor, mi mundo. <3

New friends! 🍓@strawberrystarfield I know we met fairly recently but you're all incredibly fun to talk to, your art is also amazing, your accent is real pretty (cough for a bri-💥), you're real sweet and I love reading all your thoughts and critiques about things :} (love ya Aspen /gen) 🏜️@fagdykegtws My right hand man! I know we just met through the rarepair server but oh my god we're in the same brainwave!!! You're so fun to vc and chat with and you got the best ideas ever fr fr, love ya Chewy, you're real sweet even w how lil i know you ;)

That's it folks, love yall and see you around!

[thenexusofsouls]

yeah speaking of ships Sheva might be a better match for Raiden. I love Mantis but ain't no way Raiden is falling for someone who can mind control others, ahah

{i am the caretaker of souls} While I do think there is potential there for Raiden to be shipped with Sheva, I wouldn't rule out Mantis so quickly. Raiden is a distrustful person, especially after he loses his body and the whole A.I. debacle of MGS2, but he also falls in love with a psychologist with ethics issues, so... heh.

What I mean is, while I guess it isn't on the level of Mantis actually manipulating his mind, there are a lot of people who feel that psychologists have a lot of power to manipulate people because they understand so well how minds work. There are a lot of people who are wary of being analyzed and feel uncomfortable with the idea of someone categorizing them and figuring them out to the point of being able to actually manipulate them. So for Raiden to not only fall for a psychologist, but one who sort of abuses her position of power over him by committing the cardinal sin of trying to both date and council someone at the same time, it shows that someone having power over him or having the ability to understand/manipulate his mind isn't a dealbreaker.

Again, I know it's not on the same level as actually magically being able to influence someone's mind, but I don't think it's the ability that he would fear, it's the intent behind it. He never felt threatened by Rose because he trusted her not to hurt him based on what he knew of her in the time they'd been together. Similarly, if Raiden got to know Mantis and trusted her not to use her powers in evil ways, not to use it on him without his consent, not to make him do things he would never do, etc., then he wouldn't fear her ability because there'd be no ill intent behind it. It's kindof like saying... well Raiden would never be with someone with a gun. No, Raiden would never be with someone who would turn that gun on him and fire, there's a difference. It's not the ability or potential to hurt him that he would fear or want to avoid, but the intent and desire to do so.

I guess what it comes down to, whether it's Sheva or Mantis or any other ship with Raiden, is that trust is essential. That's hard to come by with Raiden, and it takes time, it really does. But if it's achieved, then he'd trust them not to hurt him, whether with physical weapons, magical ones, psychological manipulation, anything. So the trust is crux of what he needs to be with someone, and that's honestly why what Rose did to him with the lies she told about losing John and marrying Roy hurt Raiden so deeply, because that was a breach of trust. Her reasons for doing so were accepted by him, though (I don't know that I would have been as forgiving as him, but I recognize that he was), so it'll take time to get that trust back to where it was, but he was at least willing to try.

So yeah, getting to know someone, building trust, learning the kind of person they are, and being predictably nonthreatening to him, I think all of that can overcome whatever abilities his potential ships may have. If there's trust, there's everything, heh.

@celestialmantdonna / @pretty-isnt-pretty-enough

[silentcounselor]

Hello... My name is Daniel Vaughn. I also respond to Dan and Danny, but most people just call me Vaughn. I'm new to Tumblr, so I'm not entirely sure what I'm doing. I'm learning how to customize my blog, so you'll have to forgive me if it looks bad.

As you can see in my bio, I am a psychologist. I also am an employee at Murkoff, and I worked on Project Walrider as a 'therapist'. Ask me anything.

OOC Notes & Boundaries

Hello! My name is Cerby. Vaughn is my Outlast 1/Whistleblower OC whom I love very dearly, and this is his ask blog.

>/ Since this is Outlast, there will be dark themes. If you know about Outlast, any triggers from the series may apply here. That includes abuse, torture, mind control, blood, graphic depictions of violence and death, and anything else I may be forgetting. Please take caution, and stay safe.

>/ I'm 20 out of character, so keep that in mind when sending asks. I will not answer asks that make me uncomfortable.

>/ OC and canon characters from any and all Outlast media are welcome to send in asks! Or anyone who just wants to ask questions or talk to Vaughn.

>/ I strictly ship Vaughn with Jeremy Blaire. Please keep that in mind. You are more than free to ask about them.

>/ I will be in character. The way Vaughn talks and types is more on the direct side. This ask blog is just for fun, nothing said is meant to be taken personally or seriously.

And side note... As of typing this, I actually am new to using Tumblr. So this will be a learning experience!

[rouge-fauna]

I'm a c!Tommy fan and didn't mind your aspd c!Tommy post. I don't think it was ableist. I don't exactly agree with it either though but you have a right to say it and not get talked about behind your back. I'm sorry that happened. I would probably send an ask about my interpretation in the distant future once all this has calmed down and the abundance of c!Tommy asks have stopped 😅 ❤️

I really appreciate you saying that. :) I’m glad I haven’t pissed everyone off lol, whether you agree or don’t, or like c!Tommy or don't. I mean I personally don't think it's really right to talk badly about people behind their back anyways, but it certainly does feel a little unreasonable to call me dumb, crazy and delusional without even trying to have a conversation with me. What's sad is that there are points to be made and would have been interesting to discuss like an alternative diagnosis or looking more at the diagnosing criteria. Like this is not a hill I would die on, it's not my favorite analysis or take, it's just an opinion and viewpoint I shared with reasons why, the context of which was actually countering the argument of people calling c!Dream a psychopath.

And while I'm at it, I would like to note a few things. In the essay I didn't even call c!Tommy evil or ASPD evil, and I have tried to be very clear that by no means do I believe c!Tommy deserved to be abused in Exile or any other time. And in regards to the alignment chart, I really disliked that analysis anyways. It just doesn't really work. It's a simplified tool for dnd to help people stay to character, but how do you decide what is good, lawful, and evil in a story where, as I have talked about so many times, there is no true system of laws or government, and no widely accepted bounds of morality... So just to be clear, I will reiterate - no one deserves abuse, I do not think c!Tommy is "evil" or the "Bad guy" and I do not think there is a dsmp character who is. And while it may seem like I have a vendetta or am targeting c!Tommy specifically, that's just where discussion has lead recently, mostly because of the finale, anons, and also because of noticing how often c!Tommy calls c!Dream a psychopath I thought it was interesting to look at how it might be the other way around...

Also... I guess... I don't know, aren't y'all bored of having the same old discussions and takes on c!Dream, c!Tommy, c!Wilbur, c!Punz, c!Tubbo... etc over and over? Is it not fun to look at things in a different way and say - what if this is true or - that is true and how does that change things? Is it not interesting to take the same story and lore and see if it can be seen still canonically in a different way? I mean, applying diagnosis is never going to fit perfectly, not just because I'm a 23 year old autistic engineer not a psychologist of any kind, but also mostly because we only have a set chaotic few years of them to look at with no past to base on. But beyond that, isn't it fun and interesting to see if it fits, if it provides an explanation for behavior we didn't have before? Is it so wrong of me to try and see if there are fun new ways of looking at lore instead of having detailed ships and aus?...

Anyways sorry, I may have gotten carried away there, it has been a long Monday. Regardless, it is a shame that it ruined the chance for actual exciting productive conversation and discussion to happen, because I can't say I am not curious on your interpretation. Guess we will just circle back around to it (it seems to be inevitable at his point lol) <3 <3 <3

[fareehaandspaniards]

Hey, since you smoked some more Laurence information and inspiration, how do you feel about Laurence x Rom ship idea? This is the last combination within Byrgenwerth's main four that was never explored yet :') It is /THAT/ rare. XD

Also imagine Laurence and Rom bullying Micolash and Caryll in Byrgenwerth era for not having disagreed with Willem even once (haaaahaaaa teacher's pets!), then bullying them in Healing Church era for still not evolving when Laurence got cool horns and Rom got cool extra eyes.... and maybe then some day in the Nightmare they are still laughing at Micolash and Caryll for not becoming monsters and dying as just some boring twinks gfbhghfh (I know it is not canon because Laurence did NOT want to lose humanity, I am just shitposting xD)

Are they really a rare ship?? Like yeah, I haven’t seen any fanart for them, but it seemed very obvious to me that they are very shippable!

Bullying you mean like that? XD

And Caryll with Micolash be like:

Okay, but talking about Laurence/Rom, I think that's the only ship I really like with Laurence :^) I hc Ludwig as a married man, Gehrman loves Maria, maybe Brador/Laurence could be fine...?

Rom and Laurence could be a great couple and maybe even help each other with their weaknesses and flaws. Laurence would be an incentive for Rom to be bolder and could understand her troubles, since he is an excellent psychologist, and Rom, in turn, would take care of him and help him not to go too far, combining progress and humanity! Actually, I think such a pair would be Yharnam's salvation!

I have headcanon that during Byrgerkingth era (no, I am not tired of this pun) Laurence initially considered her a “lower” class, since she is an orphan and not noble like himself (well, and also since she is very smart! We don’t miss the point that neglect and the desire to humiliate often come from envy and deep admiration, right? I’ll soon write and translate a post on this topic, because I fell in love with another ship!!!). Laurence was quite an unpleasant young man in his first two years of study! And if after a while he found a common ground with Romi, the rest of the students were compelled to tolerate him for a long time - he could easily deceive someone, set up – oh, clearly “high school” vibes xD

What pushed him and Rom to friendship - probably was that Laurence was extremely lonely and complex on the inside, and he created many enemies for himself with his own hands! Rom would have been one of those who would have forgiven all the previous mockery, just because she believes in his good side. And for this he secretly would be her “protector,” like, without advertising it, but if someone makes her feel bad, they will definitely be ridiculed and publicly humiliated.

Plus, I love the concept of the “Byrgenwerth trinity” Rom + Laurence + Micolash, and there are a lot of details about their communication, but now I probably need to focus on Rom. The key point is that she and Laurence, in a special way, acted as “parents” for Micolash (although I am not sure he liked it, especially because for some time he was interested in Rom, you know, romatically). And it brought them closer again!

As a result, in the middle of her studying in Byrgenwerth, Rom had around her - Caryll, who admired and respected her, but quietly, modestly and from afar, faithful Yuri (I remember the nuance with her name as with Caryll, but I still use version from Eng localization, since it is more familiar) and Laurence, the only who could see her as a woman, not only a good friend and sister (Micolash was kinda upset discovering that they are half-siblings :^( )

Laurence, in turn, went through real personality development, experiencing transformation during his studying, as often happens with bullies. And from an ugly, bullying duckling, he turned into a balanced, understanding and pleasant swan, which in fact he always was, just inside! (I think this would be the first time Micolash would be truly angry at him, because they would become less “alike.”) And Rom would not immediately understand this change. Reincarnated, Laurence would already be thinking about his future life, after graduation, and would come to the conclusion that he simply could not find a better wife than Rom. She is smart, kind and would not prevent him from blood researches, since she shares his passion for science. So he started hitting on her. But Rom remained indifferent, feeling that it was all insincere - just a practical calculation. And Laurence liked that fact, because she saw him through!

Next comes Research Hall, where Rom (based on your, dear Katy, research, which I sliiiightly took to my headcanons xD) was a patient (imagine Laurence being concerned about her and seeing as a future prophet for the Church, it's both science and love, tho cruel tbh), and then the Choir. Actually, Rom as the leader of the Choir is very logical, even if it’s not mentioned in the game. Laurence and Micolash, her friend and brother, are outstanding figures, why does she always remain on the sidelines? I think she had even more Insight than these two from the beginning! She perfectly perceives those same higher planes that Micolash strives for, and is able to communicate with Ebrietas, because she fEeLs.

Aaaand... Laurence and Rom could have become officially a couple after foundation of Choir! Tender, warm to each other, not demanding anything from each other except love.

There is a difficult moment with the timeline, but I would like to headcanon that Rom distanced herself from the Choir, from Micolash - from everyone when Laurence died, turning into a beast, and this became the point-of-no-return, after which she no longer needed anything, and her grief resonated with Ebrietas, causing the Great One to feel compassion for her...

So yes, good ship, deserves attention

[kaddyssammlung]

SH-related Sleep Token lyrics part 3 (last part)

Part 1 Part 2

TW: SH (you know me...I get graphic every now and then)

Chokehold

“I come as a blade”

For some reason this makes me think about a sword rather then a razor blade. But it could also be a razor blade. Makes not much sense but it fits.

“So you keep me sharp and test my worth in blood”

This is a weird one. It makes me ask questions that I don't want to know the answers to.

“even if it hurts me”

It just fits and also I already talked about how I used to just not feel much anyway. So that pain from self-harm was just a reminder that I was still here.

The Summoning

“I've got a blood trail, red in the blue”

I never noticed how often he uses the word “blood” until today.

“You've got my body, flesh and bone”

It makes me think about things. But I don't want this to get too graphic.

Granite

“Reason dislocates”

Oh yes. I did not know why I was doing what I was doing. Even in therapy when I was asked “why do you do this?”. I was like “I don't know”. I really did not know or just was not aware of it. And also when you are constantly hungover you don't really think about stuff like that.

Why did I pick up something sharp to hurt myself?! I don't really remember.

Since I'm a total adrenaline junky maybe it I was curious in the first place and then I liked it and got addicted to it. Idk....My memory is so damn bad.

“And you'll never have to talk about it You'll never wanna talk about it”

True. But my friend (BPD obsession...fave person type of friend) forced me to talk to someone. She dragged me to the school's psychologist. She was more or less a teacher but she actually had a degree in psychology. You could go to her and talk to her. So I was dragged there. Of course that did not go well. And also to this day I'm convinced that she told my parents about my self-harm. I was so damn cautious but yet one day they found out.

Whatever. It was a long time ago.

I can totally understand my friend back then because she was just concerned.

Aqua Regia

“cutting through the darkness, bouncing off the walls”

At least it's not cutting in the darkness......no he cuts through the darkness. That's just so much better and not hinting at something at all. I'm sarcastic today.

Well the dark times really do change you. All of them made me stronger. But going through them did leave scars.

“following a blood trail”

Oh well...blood stains are hard to remove. Idk what he means. Another one that I just put in here because he mentions blood again.

And there goes another one:

“cold love, hot blood”

How about hot love and cold blood?! Makes me think about those horses...idk how they are called in English. Coldblood?! Idk

Cold love as in there is no love coming back from someone but he is hot for them? It's like having a crush on a straight women or something like that. Well...wrong topic.

Vore

“My life is torn, my bones, they bleed”

I feel this line.

To me this is just an expression of being completely exhausted and having reached an end. Rien ne va plus. He is done. I get that. I felt like that so many times but it took a lot to turn that damn ship around and really get better.

“Are you in pain like I am?”

Idk Vessel. I self-harmed also. We share that but other then that I just don't know because of all the speculation. There is not much we know for sure.

Ascensionism

“'Cause anything's better then the way I feel right now”

I think we all get that and maybe know that feeling?

It's just that cutting yourself is not the answer and neither is starving yourself or drinking too much.

“Rose gold chains, ripped lace, cut glass”

Does he mean glass that is broken or does glass mean something else? I mean there are substances that you kind of lay out on a mirror. Whatever.

Cut glass fits the vibe of this so it gets to stay.

“Blood stains on the collar means just don't ask”

I wonder how they got there. Maybe from the substances?

Reminds of being scared of bleed through something without noticing it and then someone sees it.

Are You Really Okay?

Yes, I am. That's why I feel strong enough to write this.

“I was trying to hold back the darkness”

Reminds me of my mother's reaction when she found out about my self-harm. That “Oh My God....what happened? Why are you doing this? What's wrong?” So many questions but at that time I had no answers. Maybe I should write a bit more of how childhood trauma (CPTSD) leads to addiction. I felt horrible and there was a reason for that and yes it had something to do with the way I grew up.

“You woke me up one night dripping crimson on the carpet”

This sucked me in, into the lore. I wanted to know what the word crimson meant. I had to look it up and then I wanted know who was dripping crimson. At the time when Take Me Back To Eden was released I had not really looked at much photos of the band or Vessel. But it's these lines that made me search through the lyrics like I was crazy and also through photos. I found what I was looking for. Kind of.....

“Cutting deeper than the scars could run”

I still have this tied to a suicide attempt that maybe took place. Because when you are dead then there are no more scars. But that's all I'm going to say about this. It's just so sad but I can understand that.

I should also mention:

“I cannot fix your wounds this time”

“Please don't hurt yourself again”

The Appariton

“I wake up to a suicide frenzy”

I don't even want to think about this one.

“This wound will never heal”

I kind of get that. But it seems like this is more a metaphorical wound.

“It just split what's left of the burning silence”

What was that with burnt skin again...?! Burning cathedrals....This dude amazes me more and more with the endless connections. But I don't really get this line.

Do You Wish That You Loved Me?

“Or do you push into constant aching?”

Pouring salt into the wounds?! I actually did that.

“Can you ever forgive? (Yourself)

The guilt thing again. We are all guilty of something. That makes me joke. There are some things that I have not brought up yet. But I'm kind of...idk. Some things are too much. Or are still too much. But yes I know what it's like to feel so guilty and you need to hurt yourself so can deal with those feelings.

“Maybe not that you conceal your feelings, they just don't exist”

I was lectured by a therapist once about not knowing the answer to how I feel. When I'm dissociated then I don't know how I feel. The point of dissociation is to keep me save from difficult emotions. None of my therapists ever noticed how dissociated I was.

I already mentioned that not being able to feel or being dissociated was one of the reasons behind my self-harm.

Rain

“It's that chemical cut that I can get down with”

Because Aqua Regia is used to dissolve stuff? And you stopped visiting Sleep? Or it's something that's like “noFap” which is common among spiritual humans and others? Or an actual cut?! Idk what to do with this one. But I had to put it in here.

Take Me Back To Eden

“Bleed through spaces”

Hospital after “crimson on the carpet”?! Idk. Too much and don't want to think about certain things.

I don't really have anything attached to this.

“Reset my patient violence”

patient or a patient.....let's leave it with that....

“I spit blood when I wake up”

So have I. But it was the worst hangover that I ever had. Other than that it's just in here because of the word blood again.

“I dangle in like cold cuts”

Being trapped in hospital is not nice. Time stands still and there is nothing much you can do. It felt like that in psychiatry and it also felt like that when woke up in hospital one day.

“No amount of self-sought fury will bring back the glory of innocence”

I have this tied to something different but I don't want to bring this up here....this breaks my heart actually.

You can see self-harm as some sort of self-sought fury. At least kind of. When you just don't know how to deal with things in a more healthy way then it's more of a strategy to survive. Even when it does seem like it. But it often felt like that for me.

Euclid

“I play along with the life signs anyway Hope to God you don't know this feeling”

I know this feeling, Vessel. I just do. Suicidal ideation is probably the best term to describe it.