#there's a lot to do for this audition but i'm just thankful the artistic director gave me a few days to prepare

[the-music-keeper]

I'm crossing Objective #17 off for the week. I'm hoping to get some calls or emails tomorrow, and I did get an audition set up for Thursday, so that's encouraging.

I did say audition, not interview. Perhaps I might be able to add more piano work to my resume? A girl can hope!

[clairedaring]

Hello Claire! It always takes me by surprise and leaves me with awe when I read your posts about thai production houses. And it's a topic that really interests me.

So, disclaimer before I mention my question - sorry if this is stupid or weird, but why did Nadao close its operation? I mean, given the fact that they had such powerhouses under them (not just actors but directors, producers, musicians, etc.) and if I remember correctly, it was right after IPYTM (or maybe after a year or so), so it felt like they were on the pathway of constant success.

~ @tipsyjaehyun

Hi Rain!

I always love talking about Nadao so thank YOU for allowing me the opportunity to talk about them. And please, there are never stupid or weird questions ever, especially when it comes to Nadao Bangkok (rip love).

When Nadao announced they were closing down, they posted this very long letter explaining why as well. Here's a summary of the contents:

In short: Nadao will terminate their roles as artist development, series & music producer. The reason is that their artists are now grownup enough to choose their own paths. Also the seniors have different goals. It is not sudden. They have been discussing it for a while. We have seen many Nadao artists moving out and continue with their own journey. This is the reason. Nadao will terminate their roles and want to give their artists more freedom to work in the industry. Ongoing series production will be passed to the director and they will make their own decision. Ongoing music production will be under the artists’ own names. Nadao will also introduce their artists to network in the path that their artists are interested in.

Nadao closing its business leaves a lot of regret in the hearts of fans who follow Nadao artists (me, i am the fan in question). Out of all the speculations, I think there's this one Reddit comment from u/Virtual_Tadpole9821 that aligns most with my speculation.

I wasn't originally going to comment because I was hoping to see some analysis emerge online, but since I'm not seeing any here's my two cents anyway. Knowing Nadao, the move is unlikely to be directly motivated by financial reasons. The company has consistently been profitable. Its financials for the 2021 fiscal year haven't been filed yet, but even in 2020, when the pandemic first hit, it still made a net profit of 29 million baht after taxes. Though this was down from 40 million in 2019, it's still more than 21 million in 2018. Things might have been worse in 2021, but it's unlikely to be too bad for them to weather. They don't appear to have that many fixed costs. As most of their income comes from artist management and the main costs are the artists' cuts, less work just means the pie is smaller, but the company still gets a piece and won't bleed to death. Not producing means not having to pay for crew and equipment, and their productions are usually externally funded anyway. If the company was facing financial difficulties, the first thing to do would be to scale back on non-performing operations, and the loss-making Nadao Music would be the first to go. But that's not what they're doing. Rather, they're shutting down all current operations at once. The move is probably more due to ideological re-questioning of the company's mission. As /u/dangrankeyi pointed out, Nadao tries to position itself as first and foremost a talent management agency. But it hasn't really been able to grow itself much in that regard. As their artists keep outgrowing their target group, they need to keep replacing them. But the scene is much more crowded now than in 2009 when the company was founded or in 2013 when it made Hormones. The company doesn't appear to have been successfully developing much new talent. Its latest pivoting attempt was when it launched Nadao Academy in early 2020, but that seems to have ceased with the pandemic. And even if the project was successful, what work would the company find for the trainees? It's not like it's doing that well with its current artists anyway. Nadao has some 30 actors under its umbrella, but apart from BKPP, things have been rather quiet for them. The problem I see is that there's a disjoint between what the company wants to do and what it actually does best. It wants to grow talent, but it's having problems finding work for that talent, and doesn't quite have the capacity to generate that work itself. On the other hand, Nadao has become best known for is productions, which for the most part have been passion projects driven more by their creator's visions than by business strategy. But such projects don't serve those original goals well enough. The only way they could have sustained this was probably to keep dishing out seasons of Hormones, but they didn't, because they knew they wouldn't be able to maintain quality, and even if they did, it would have lost steam by now anyway. The thing is, Nadao doesn't actually need to exist for its creators to do the production stuff they want, and are good at. That can be accommodated under parent company GDH and its other subsidiaries, which is where Nadao's production crews come from anyway. Looking at it this way, it isn't very difficult to see why they'd come to the decision not to continue doing the things they're doing as Nadao Bangkok.

And I would say that after two years since Nadao closes down, it's been pretty clear that the closing down of Nadao was more ideology-motivated than business. While Nadao officially shut down it's business, the actual company itself was renamed Tada Entertainment to accompany P'Yong Songyos Sugmakanan's pursuit of making the next perfect idol groups. Tada Entertainment now manages girl group MXFRUIT (under subsidiary label Ily Lab)...

And BUS (a Thai pop group formed through 789 Survival, under subsidiary Sonray Music). Khunpol (Bas from ITSAY) also competed in 789 Survival and debuted in BUS.

And DICE (consisting of the members who participated in 789 Survival but didn't make it into BUS, also managed by Sonray Music)

One must be quite confounded by P'Yong Soyos' new pursuits but watching the documentary of how 9x9 (Nine By Nine) was formed, I think it becomes very clear that P'Yong has always harboured an interest in making the next big Thai pop group, similar to Kpop idol group style. I highly recommend watching this if you have time, or at least the first two episodes of the documentary. It's honestly one of the realest documentaries I've ever watched of an idol group, the way they talk about each other here is basically how they talk about each other in real life, even now.

It was just unfortunate that 9x9 had to be a temporary thing 🥲 (understandable though, they had 4 full time lakorn actors Tor, James, Captain, Ryu, 2 singer/actor Ice and JJ and 3 music-focused artists Third, Jackie, Porsche). So their reunion on the last episode of 789 Survival was a hugeeeeeee thing.

So yeah.... before I ramble on and forget what your original question is, I would say P'Yong's general pursuit and ambitions in the music/Thai pop industry coupled with Nadao's roster of artists outgrowing its target group are the biggest reasons for Nadao closing in general.

I'm always grateful to Nadao for bringing us some of the best series in existence (crazy to think how In Family We Trust is conceived as a part of 9x9 project, with the main purpose to make a series to star all nine boys of 9x9) yet it swept the Nataraja awards (Thai Emmys) that year. This is yet another stellar example of how Nadao ended up excelling at what they don't plan to do (producing series) than what they do intend (managing artists/boy groups). 9x9 was a successful project though, don't get me wrong, I'm just trying to make the case that IFWT is more successful than P'Yong probably intended it to be (though P'Yong was pretty ambitious with this project himself, getting all the experienced older lakorn actors into this so perhaps he did plan for it to be that successful).

Even though, there were many Nadao artists that left before they closed down like James, Peach, Nonkul... I really like that most Nadao artists remained very close with their fellow Nadao peers, and often times ending up in same projects together once again. This year, a few notable reunions off the top of my head is Nonkul and Ud Awat in a horror zombie film Operation Undead (currently out in cinemas), Tor and JJ in thriller series Spare Me Your Mercy (currently filming), Nonkul and Captain in the Mouse TH remake (just wrapped filming).

I'm always sad about Nadao closing down but seeing how most former Nadao artists have no trouble finding works on their own after its closing, I'm very happy to see them flourishing and doing their own thing. I love that there's a huge family energy when it comes to Nadao because the senior artists always consider their junior like their little brothers and sisters (Ice Paris being the MC for both DICE and BUS showcases, Tor and Ice being the MCs for the 789 Survival). P'Yong has previously talked about how "Nadao isn't just a company, it's like a home. That's why when some of their artist left Nadao, P'Yong considered it more as them "graduating" so they can grow and build path on their own."

Below is a clip of Tor talking about how grateful he is to P'Yong (if you watch 9x9 documentary and some other interviews Tor did, you'll see that P'Yong can be quite harsh to him and put much pressure on Tor (and other Nadao artists as well) but they all seem to look up to him like a parental figure)

Not to mention, if you are a fan of Hormones, the girls always have their annual reunions and it always warms my heart to see how close they still are with each other.

Sighs... I almost completely forgot the question again. But yea Nadao definitely could have stayed and given us more magnum opus because I personally haven't had enough at all but it's great to see P'Yong happy with his successful groups and the former Nadao artists going on their own individual paths while maintaining good relations with P'Yong and Nadao/GDH creative crew (directors, producers, writers...)

[pascalina]

The brothers' movie

11/07/2015

They don't use the same last name, but they are siblings. Pedro Pascal (40) the Chilean actor who starred in Game of Thrones and now has a starring role in the Netflix series Narcos, uses his mother's surname because it is easier to pronounce in English. 17 years younger, Lucas Balmaceda Pascal (23), also an actor, debuted in Los 80 and today stars in the TVN series Juana Brava. Here, both talk for the first time about their relationship, their love for cinema and their mutual admiration.

José Pedro Balmaceda Pascal was born in Chile, but a few months later he had to go into exile with his parents and his older sister, Javiera, to Denmark. It was the end of 1975. Thanks to the Rockefeller scholarship granted for his father, the doctor José Balmaceda Riera, a year later they moved to the United States: first they lived in San Antonio, Texas. Life there was just beginning and it was not easy.

Seventeen years later, in 1992, Lucas Balmaceda was born in Orange County, California, into the comfort of a family that was financially in its prime. His dad was at the peak of his career: as a fertility specialist and director of one of the University of California's reproductive health centers. But suddenly they moved back to Chile when Lucas was three years old and his brother Nicolas was eight. The two older ones stayed there. Pedro was already studying drama at Orange County High School of the Arts. Then he went to New York to study theater at the Tisch School of the Arts at New York University.

After a couple of small appearances in TV series, in 2014 he took the big leap in his career: he played Prince Oberyn in Game of Thrones, which made him world famous. Today, he has a starring role in the series Narcos. He is also filming a movie with Matt Damon and Willem Dafoe.

Fame came early for Lucas. After leaving Saint George High School in 2010, he studied theater at the Universidad Católica, and he began to shine: in year fourth, he starred in the theater play "La noche obstinada", by choreographer Pablo Rotemberg, and got a role in the successful television series Los 80 and today, in his last year, he is the co-star of Juana Brava, the new TVN nighttime series.

Scene one:

Lucas appears in Pedro's life

P: "I was 17 when Lucas was born. He was a baby when I left to go to university. I remember my first visit back and Lucas, who was not even two years old, was already the owner of the house. I remember those looks, wanting to tell me: 'I don't know who you are, but this is my house, mate.

To this day I have never seen that personality in another child. It was fascinating to see that wit in someone so small. Since he was a kid he had that fierce intelligence... The four siblings, Javiera, the eldest and the queen of the family; Nicolas, the doctor; Lucas and I are like a compact and consistent unit. I can't imagine life without them".

L: "Pedro was studying at the university in New York when I was born. When he went home for vacations to see the family, as I didn't know him, I thought: 'who is this guest, who is this weirdo who kisses my mother? She's mine!'. Back in Chile, every year Pedro came to visit us. It was the most entertaining thing in the world for me. He was much older and he would come with all the coolness, with all the culture of cinema, with horror movies that were not available here. Then we would watch them and play them out, we would do sketches. We would play that Pedro was a murderous monster and we would escape from him. We were each a character. He was very funny, he did voices, he impersonated people. He gets mad when I tell him, but I've always found that he has a Jim Carrey thing about him, he manages to make some impressive faces. When he came on, I couldn't stop watching him, he was too entertaining. We are all big movie buffs thanks to my dad. When I was three years old, he took my brothers and me to see Batman. I remember crying hysterically. I was very young, sensitive, and being in the cinema was like entering to another reality: loud noises, giant screen. I didn't understand anything.

Scene two

Transplanted

P: "What's Chilean about me and what's gringo about me is a very interesting question, because I don't think even at 40 years old I've been able to figure it out. I was raised and educated in the United States and socialized a lot with American pop culture, but Chilean pride has always been unwavering. My parents were exiled for eight years. So our visits to Chile were regular. My whole life I have lived in the United States and my whole life I have visited my relatives in Chile. However, since my siblings were raised in Chile, my connection to the country is much stronger today and it is something I am grateful for. Something that happens to me a lot is that when I say I've been in the U.S. my whole life, they say, "Well, you're a gringo then! And after a conversation in my fluent Spanish with a clear Chilean accent that same person turns around and says: I've been listening to you, you're Chilean!

L: "I am Chilean because I lived and grew up here since I was three years old, but at the same time I have a cultural disconnection: my parents lived 25 years in the United States, my brothers are gringos. My visual culture is super gringo, the TV shows I watched when I was a kid or the movies I watch to this day I understand them from that place: as an American. More than being born in the United States, I feel it's because of my family's background".

SCENE THREE:

The performance

P: "There were good years and bad years (when I started my acting career in the United States). Many years I was a waiter to supplement my income. But from a very young age I was auditioning for professional jobs. In my late twenties my career in the theater was relatively consistent. Then, when opportunities in television arose, I was consolidating and it became much easier to pay my expenses. I think that struggle, going through those situations, empowers you a lot and it's one of the things I'm enormously grateful for. And Game of Thrones was an incredible gift. It's the best role I've ever played and they're the best people I've ever worked with."

L: "It's Pedro's fault that I wanted to be an actor. But when I told him I wanted to study theater it was hard for him, more than anything, because he cares about me and studying theater is hard. You have to be very wise and have a super high self-esteem to take care of yourself. Pedro went through many things. If there is an actor who doesn't have contacts in the United States, it's him. Everything he has achieved is because of his work. That's why when people ask me why I don't go to the U.S., it's a resounding no. Being Pedro Pascal's little brother is not going to get me around the corner; I would have to be Tom Cruise's twin to achieve anything. Even so, Pedro had many failed career starts. In 2011, for example, he was offered a starring role in a series called Wonder Woman and it was eventually canceled. That's why, when Games of Thrones came up, I was like, wow! We were all freaking out, because Games of Thrones is like a worldwide trending topic. All the episodes he was in, we were all watching them together at my house, eating pizza or sushi."

SCENE FOUR:

Mutual lessons

P: "I try not to get too involved in anything Lucas does or how he does it. He has single-handedly created each of his experiences and is one of the most inspiring things I've ever seen. He loves his work and is continually developing his skills for television and theater, and eventually film. He executes like a real artist and, to be honest, it is more common for me to learn something from him than for him to learn something from me. I mean that very sincerely. Lucas reminds me to work hard and keeps me inspired. When I saw him in Los 80 I was incredibly proud, but not surprised. I was seeing something I had always known. The only advice I've given him is to not be such a workaholic, to take care of himself and to be proud of what he's accomplished and what he still has yet to accomplish. Deep down, I'm always going to be the protective big brother."

L: "Pedro is an object of admiration for me. What he says is law for me. Sometimes I ask him: 'Pedro, did you see that movie?' and he says: 'Yes, I didn't like it'. I tell him: 'Oh, I didn't like it either'. The nice thing about our relationship is that it happens so sporadically, once or twice a year, that the moments when we see each other are very intense. We either fight a lot or we love each other too much, but it's always like a story, like a movie. While he's there and I'm here, we talk a lot on WhatsApp and Facebook".

P: "With Lucas we always keep each other up to date on what movies to watch, what TV shows are good. I bug him all the time asking him about what's going on in his life and I'm always asking him about his perspective on things. Despite being away from each other for a long time, Lucas and I are very close and always have been. I see Lucas at the beginning of an amazing career, with an unwavering curiosity and passion. I love it when he confides in me about things he is enjoying or situations he is dealing with."

L: "I've never seen Pedro in theater, but I've been told he's tremendous. On camera, I find that he has a very intense look. He also has, and in that we are very similar, a very strong visual culture, the fact that we have always liked horror movies. He plays characters that hide something, dark characters. A great strength is that he is very sensual, he knows how to handle himself well from seduction".

P: "Lucas is brave, he's fearless. There's nothing he's not willing to try, he's never going to give up on a challenge, he's never going to leave something halfway, no matter what that means to him. Lucas is unstoppable.

Link interview

[muellercorn]

Happy International Women's Day! These are women involved in theatre that I believe have paved the future for female artists. I think it would be apt for you to read their names and stories and then let me know women who inspire you in the theatre world and how you think they're shaping the future. Reblog if you see your inspirations and share their stories.

1. Jennifer Kirby. We may only be 3 months into 2019, but I'm ready to call Jennifer Kirby woman of the year. At age 30, I'd already consider her a veteran of the RSC, a company where she has portrayed so many Shakespearean females with a new found voice and personality. She first appeared on our screens in Call The Midwife in 2016 as Nurse Valerie Dyer. From the start Val has faced some of the most brutal storylines, most involving the rights of women and the working class, and been an absolute inspiration due to her brave and loving personality. However over the last 8 weeks she has been the pioneer character of the most powerful women's rights stories I've seen in entertainment ever. If it hadn't been for Kirby's authentic, sensitive performance and her deep understanding of the human condition from women who've walked different lives from her own, this storyline would not have had the impact that it has. She never complains about a hard storyline either, when interviewers ask how difficult scenes were, her response is always one of gratitude enthusiasm and excitement for the changes it could bring about in society. I believe this will be the start of more powerful storylines for women in the media and moreover I know her performance has had a real life effect on society, changing and developing people's opinions and giving them fresh eyes to see other people's experiences through with sympathy and care.

2. Jessie Mueller. During her Broadway career this far, Mueller has portrayed some of the most complex women with such heart and integrity. She has proven endlessly that vulnerability and strength can coexist. In 2016 Jessie won the Lilly Award (awards for females making a difference in society) for best actress following her run as Jenna in Waitress. A not was left in the theatre's lobby saying that Jessie's heartfelt performance helped a woman decide to leave the abusive relationship she was in. Additionally Jessie has done countless benefits for charities benefiting women, is an activist for equal rights and a dedicated educator. Jessie has defied type casting and shown us all that we are not defined by anything but our hearts and work ethic.

3. Ruthie Ann Miles. Strength, power, inspiration - Ruthie is the true embodiment of all these things. Moreover she spreads happiness and joy, ever since I watched her win her Tony I just felt this overwhelming sense of happiness. This woman spreads light everywhere she goes and never fails to make me brim with happiness and smiles. In today's world we need a light and Ruthie truly is that light.

4. Marianne Elliott. To me, Marianne Elliott is the best theatre director of our times. Directing is a profession that is predominantly male dominated and I believe that Elliott will be one of the key figures in changing that. Her love for her work is evident in the current revival of Company a true highlight of the theatre scene in recent years. Her integrity, leadership skills and incredible visions have led to a groundbreaking piece of theatre for women.

5. Rosalie Craig. Her incredible portrayal of the 'new' Bobbie in the 2018 Company Revival has given an in depth, layered portrayal of a woman who is unapologetic for her decisions and personal internal debates. Craig brings so much to this role that you don't see Bobbie as promiscuous like expected but rather as someone simply living life making her own calls and it's absolutely refreshing and unique to see. Furthermore her talent is so stellar that it is guaranteed to inspire a generation of young performers.

6. Katrina Lenk. Resilience strikes me when I think of Katrina Lenk. Her break came in her 40s, prior to this she was relatively unknown in the mainstream theatre world however she never stopped working. Women are ingrained to believe their value decreases as they age, especially in the arts, however Katrina has proven that this is not true. We gain experience, life lessons, emotional qualities, skills and ethics that helps us grow as people and performers. When I think of Katrina Lenk I think of someone so driven by love rather than fame. Additionally, through the characters she portrayed, Katrina has given a voice to so many women who's stories would typically go untold.

7. Jessie Nelson. A valued part of the first all female Broadway creative team for Waitress, Nelson wrote the book for the musical and in doing so helped create a masterpiece and a true gift for all women who feel their story doesn't matter. She comprehensively understands what it means to be female, the importance of female friendship and the responsibility that came with writing a script like this. Thanks to Nelson we have a musical that honours our stories and inspires us to go out and speak of our own experiences. She helped create the living proof that female stories sell and I'm sure we will see many more following in its footsteps.

8. Paula Vogel. Scriptwriter, Vogel, first came to my intention when I first watched Indecent on Broadway HD. The main two things that hit me regarding women's rights upon watching the play, was the portrayal of sexuality between Dina and Ruth outside of the internal play 'God of Vengeance', this relationship is powerful and much more emotionally based than trying to portray lesbian relationships as sexual items for men's pleasure as many arts still find acceptable. Additionally at the start of the play when describing the casting type of each troupe member, Vogel avoids attaching gender to the description starting the tone with the message they desire to continue with, equality for all.

9. Eva Noblezada. I will never forget Noblezada's performance as Kim, I remember being truly in awe and inspired. Then when learning how young she was I was admired at her dedication to travel thousands of miles from home at such a young age in true dedication to telling a story she believes in. Miss Saigon has a story line so beautifully reflective of the maternal side of women and Noblezada's performance portrayed this beautifully showing the true fierce strength that women posses.

10. Hailey Kilgore. A Tony award nomination at age 19! That is more than enough to inspire. Additionally the profound and positive outlook Kilgore has about the world is beyond beautiful and heartwarming.

11. Patti Murin. I admire anyone who speaks out about mental illness and Murin does so so candidly that it is unbelievably inspirational. It's a daunting thing to do because mental illness can be mistaken for being 'overly emotional' or 'unreliable' and I commend Murin for speaking out anyway knowing what she is risking because it will remind an entire generation who struggle with their mental health not to give up because of it. Despite her struggles Murin's work is incredibly joyful and can brighten up any day.

12. Sara Bareilles. Always dedicated to writing her truth, Bareilles has never cabed into the pressure of writing a traditional love song at times when it didn't feel authentic to her. Being motivated to make art rather than money, Sara Bareilles has written so many anthems for women reminding them to feel and fight. Furthermore she's proved that you don't have to write songs about men to sell music, authenticity leads to success.

13. Adrienne Warren. This woman is a force. She is currently giving everything she's got to bring the empowering story of Tina Turner to life 8 times a week in the west end. She is the driving force of a vital story for women in society and she treats it with the importance and passion it deserves. Furthermore her social media is dedicated to educating people about equality for all in society.

14. Marin Mazzie. In September 2018 Marin lost her battle to Ovarain cancer but her legacy will pass from generation to the next. Her dedication to what she loved during her battle is the epitome of female strength, additionally she committed time to activism and raising awareness of ovarian cancer. To me 'Back to Before' - Ragtime is the ultimate theatre anthem for women's rights and Marin's recording and perspective is so moving and empowering that it has the ability to motivate anyone who listens to change the world.

15. Bernadette Peters. A true theatre icon Peters has wrestled with all the names in the book, the classic term 'Diva' that was constantly thrown around when a woman was so powerful and successful in their field that people didn't know how to react. I don't think anything will stop this woman..... I mean did you see the press ups on The View, in high heels and a dress! Icon! Furthermore this was the week before her 70th birthday. I don't think Peters will ever age in spirit or appearance but she embraces her age regardless, the host with held her name but Peters made it clear that she feels age shouldn't be hidden from as our value does not decrease in anyway. Her work in theatre and charity should be inspirational to all.

16. Lindsay Mendez. Firstly I admire any women dedicated to educating and teaching, like Lindsay is. I could say a lot about Lindsay, but I feel she says it best herself. She is true to her identity, body positive and wants to represent everyday people through her art, as we all should if we consider art as a mirror to society.

“When I moved to New York, I was told to change my last name from Mendez to Matthews, or I wouldn’t work. I’m so proud to be part of a community that celebrates diversity and individuality … Be your true self and the world will take note.”

"When you hear you’re going to audition for “Dogfight,” the show about bringing ugly women to parties, you’re like, ‘Oh, great, thank you.’ But that’s also our dream as actors, to play someone else and give someone else a voice. I love this character so much."

17. Cobie Smulders. Whilst filming HIMYM Cobie was privately battling Ovarian Cancer, she beat it and later went on to defy odds by having her own children. Her dedication to her art during this time is a testimony to her strength and will. Furthermore during her time on the show Cobie brought to life incredibly moving stories specific to women in society giving them a voice. She has since gone on to have a successful career in film and theatre and has a large voice in social activism. Her accounts about her battle with ovarian cancer will help to give so much support to women going through similar difficult times and hopefully raise awareness in others so they're able to detect this illness in early stages.

18. Ella Fitzgerald. To me Ella is the American song book, she is the voice of all the Gershwin, Porter, Berlin musicals that came to follow. She gave a voice to a minority and inspired so many people. She continues to inspire people when ever you listen to recordings of her and feel the raw emotion. The modern musical stands on Ella's shoulders.

19. Audra McDonald. SIX TONY AWARDS. She's defied every odd and stereotype by purely working hard and being a truly good person. She's inspired many people and shown us all that anything is possible when you're prepared to prove people wrong. Furthermore she always takes time to thank and honour those who came before her, the people who's shoulders she stands on and that to me is what female empowerment is more than anything else.

20. Judy Garland. My personal inspiration and to be honest I struggle to articulate how she inspires me as it's more of an emotion than a string of thoughts. I just believe Garland strove for love, kindness and friendship over anything. I also believe her work is a sign of hope, no matter how she was treated she never gave in, she didn't stop doing what she loved because of the way she was treated she kept going. It's debatable if that's the right decision, but it doesn't matter as it was a strong decision and it was Judy's. I respect her an unbelievable amount for her voice, her heart and her perspective on the world. Imagine what would be if that sweet girl hadn't sang 'Over The Rainbow' all those years ago, and imagine even more what could have been if we saw Garland for the layered, complex human being she was rather than sweet and cheery Dorothy Gale. Personally whenever I get the chance to perform I always think of Garland before I step on stage, I thank her for her sacrifices to the art because it wouldn't be what it is today if it weren't for her, I don't think there will ever be a star as bright again. It's also to remember that whilst addiction and mental illness don't descriminate, Judy wouldn't have faced many of the issues she did if she wasn't a woman.

"Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else."

The perspective we all should have had:

"I've always taken 'The Wizard of Oz' very seriously, you know. I believe in the idea of the rainbow. And I've spent my entire life trying to get over it."

I hope to hear of those who inspire you and I hope we all continue to inspire and empower each other. Alicia x

[littlethingwithfeathers]

When you said ask me anything, you probably didn't expect this, but I'm really curious. How did you become a stage manager and what kind of stage manager are you?

Thank you for your question!

How did I become a stage manager?

By accident.

I'm not even kidding. I didn't mean to. I absolutely never set out for a career in stage management. It just… sort of happened. A combination of a life spent studying the performing arts (ballet, music, and theatre), a sincere of lack of desire to actually perform and just being in the right place, at the right time, with just enough alcohol in my system to say I'd do something I'd never done before.

The arts have always been a huge part of my life. 10 years of ballet. 20 years of playing clarinet. 10 years of singing. I loved practicing. I loved learning about artistic intricacy and nuance… but I never liked performing. It was an emotional chore, and one that I was not capable of handling with any sort of grace. I never quite understood why I was so drawn to the arts if I wasn't meant to be a performer. I just… felt strange without it, and naturally gravitated towards artistic endeavors whenever possible.

And so, I was always around artistic people throughout my life. Some of whom get very upset with me when I don't claim to be an artist myself. It nurtured a serious drive in me to help them do what they were striving to do. To pave the way where possible. I got a reputation as a… facilitator. The one that would go make copies, or run for coffee, or help make sure people who lacked transportation could make it to rehearsal. I don't meant to make myself sound like a saint. I'm not. It's self serving ultimately, because what I crave more than anything is the process. I love a good rehearsal more than a good performance.

With that reputation established, cut to me in my mid twenties. Married. Back in college trying to figure out if there's anything I can stomach getting a degree in. And singing in the choir, because of course I was. At a post-concert party, one of my fellow choristers introduces me to the university's theatre director. And he asks why he didn't see me at auditions for the opera they'd just finished, or the musical they were about to do. I give a mealy-mouthed response about not really knowing how to do an audition and blah blah blah.

And he looked me up and down (I'll never forget it) and says, "I need an assistant for the musical. You want to come help?"

And in what would become a trend, I said "yes" to him, without the first question of what I was agreeing to.

At the top of the next semester, I email the director asking what the rehearsal schedule looks like. He gives me the date of the table read and I show up, expecting to be fetching coffee or something. I was handed a stack of scripts, a clipboard with some paperwork with the title "Stage Manager" on the back, and given the following instruction.

"Hand these out, take attendance, and then get my rehearsal started please. You'll sit by me and read stage directions."

I almost ran. Right then. I had no idea how to do anything in that sentence. I'd never done anything like this.

But I didn't. I knew a lot of the actors and musicians in that room, and I couldn't just… bail. And the rest as they say is history.

As for what kind of stage manager I am, if you mean what sort of work I do, I'm sort of everywhere. I work in a smallerish town (population hovering under 200k) so I don't really specialize. My current contract is with the local professional ballet company, but I'm also found stage managing for community and children's theatre, the city symphony, a chamber choir (where I also sing), and whoever else calls me up and needs someone to work through their performance logistics. I also get called to do lighting design and fight choreography on occasion. Since I have a broad range of artistic disciplines in my background, I pretty much fit in everywhere.

But as for what kind of stage manager I am in terms of temperament… I'm sort of the mom-friend stage manager. I don't do the aloof, separated from the cast thing. I understand why some stage managers do that, and some shows require it. But it's not my style. I'm there to help. I'm there to love the show and its people, and I can't do that from a distance. I'm very much the stage manager that wipes tears, bakes cookies, and gives hugs as much as I mop and tape the stage, write reports, and take roll. I want that line of communication between me and my artists to be wide open. And yes… there are difficulties inherent in handling oneself that way, but I'm more equipped to deal with those than I am the difficulties of the flip side of the coin.

So there you have it. That's what a feathered stage manager is like, and how she came to be.