#there you go brain i actually wrote the thing xD

[tiredassmage]

betting on a sunrise

I insist that there was a missed opportunity for Nik to drain that Cassandra Sunrise right in front of Hunter and be almost bored about it, so my brain insisted that we may as well write something to fix it. So, here we are: we'll let Nik steal the spotlight of being Nine for just a moment so that I can have this as a little amusement.

Also posted to ao3(x). And, ofc, Imperial Agent spoilers for the chapter 2 prelude, The Master Strategem.

rating: teen (some swearing); characters: hunter, the imperial agent, shoutout to our best support vector hyllus

Neon lights so vibrant and eclectic they’d be burned into the back of your eyelids for another three days, even in your sleep. At least Nar Shadaa never changed - a reliable bastion of backstabbing, gambling, backstabbing, cartels and street gangs.

And backstabbing, of course.

Still enough to make Nikihlus’s lip curl back slightly over his teeth. And still, he’d rather his chances here than the cloying egos of Dromund Kaas. Or that killer humidity, for another.

“Many auras here oscillate… wildly, agent.” Vector Hyllus cocks their head with the faintest trace of a frown at the corner of their lips. A blue twi’lek woman in a fit of laughter stumbles into their shoulder on her way out with her companion without so much as a glance back. “It is… interesting to sort through.”

“Been to many a cantina, Vector?”

“The nest is not without its celebrations, if that is what you are inquiring, agent.”

The zabrak nearly rolled his eyes, though settled for inclining his head towards the bar. “You’ll have to forgive me if I pass on participating, given the opportunity.”

“Each to their own taste,” they replied lightly. Their eyes drifted across the room as the pair picked their way around a few tables, while the agent was clearly concerned with making for the bar. “We believe it best we do not imbibe at this time. We shall watch your back.”

Nikihlus cast a glance at them over his shoulder. “Suit yourself.” He gestured towards the wall at the end of the bar. “Try to keep yourself out of trouble.”

“Noted.” Certainly they both knew that was why Kaliyo had not accompanied them to this particular rendezvous.

It was curious enough Imperial Intelligence would have one alien Cipher, he could’ve argued. Not that they’d make half so odd a pair here on the Hutt moon, and Hyllus was not exactly much less of a curiosity. Nik could’ve likely enjoyed the higher threat of something starting a brawl with the Rattataki at his side, but rules were rules with their Imperial masters.

For now, at least. And he wasn’t half as much as interested in trying to explain Djannis’s plan to Keeper’s stiff lips. He was, perhaps, on enough of the woman’s bad side as it was.

Nikihlus sighed as he finally rested his arms against the bar. Something strong ought to take the edge off of the work. At the very least, it was far preferable to wasting time wondering if Keeper thought this was some amusing jest for what had transpired on the Dominator. And far more preferable than trying to puzzle out that particular master’s ideas of fate. It was more than enough to make a man miss working for the Hutts.

“Well, hello there.”

Nik closed his eyes and buried a groan somewhere beneath his stomach before he let his eyes slide to his right and settle on the blonde perched against the bar two seats down already wearing a smile.

At least make it good.

The man opened an arm to gesture to a glass beside him. “I suppose she didn’t want to finish her drink. Perhaps I can interest you in what’s left of a Cassandra Sunrise?”

Nik weighed flashing a scowl against the proffered nearly-full glass. And Hyllus’s absence from his side to comment on accepting drinks on the job - from strangers in cantinas, no less.

“Perhaps,” Nik allowed a drawl over the word and shifted to lean against one arm on the bartop - a better mirror of his would-be company. “What’ll it cost me?”

The blonde’s smile grew, and rather pleased, too, with a chuckle to match. “Ah, are all Imperial Ciphers so mistrusting?”

Nik stiffened, breath stilling in place as golden eyes narrowed slightly.

Enough to make the blonde laugh again. He pushed off the bar to close the distance between them and slid the glass closer. “Oh, I’m sorry. Pretty presumptuous of me. Though… I suppose I could just have to keep looking for that Cipher somewhere else… Imperials wouldn’t have such a good sense of direction down here with little old us, would they?”

Nik blew a sharp exhale out of his nostrils. Cocky. He pressed a smile to his lips as his company turned like he was about to leave and took up the glass. “It’d certainly be interesting, wouldn’t it?”

“Very,” the blonde agreed. He perched back against the bar. “Couldn’t imagine it’d have anything to do with that Cipher wanting to change sides.”

Nik hummed as he raised the glass to his lips. Not for the faint of heart. “Careful,” he mused, “I might start believing you got this for me instead of your lady friend.”

That grin glittered like a Hutt statue. “Maybe I did. Maybe I didn’t. You certainly gave me enough time. Made the check at the spaceport.”

The kind of burn that might fry the horns off a krayt dragon, that Sunrise. Nik swallowed and held out the glass to inspect the remaining contents. “Reckon your Imperial ‘friend’ would like that, would you..?” He glanced at the blonde over the rim of the glass.

“Codename Hunter, Strategic Information Service.”

Nik flashed a wry smile. “Trying to kill me already, hm?”

Hunter shrugged. “That’s what we’re going to find out, if you still plan on playing along.” For a mercy, that obnoxious little dangle on his lips seemed to be quieted as he eyed Nik, glass to lips again. “Nothing’s free-”

“Except the drink?”

Hunter’s smile dropped, leaving behind only dark eyes that Nik met silently over the glass. “Job first, then we’ll see if you’re worth anything. No sob stories, no complaints, no questions. Then I’ll consider introducing you.”

With all pleasantries discarded, Nik merely inclined his head slightly. “Better keep talking, then.” The Sunrise would only last so long, after all. Without breaking eye contact, he tipped the glass just enough to offer a steady burn.

“There’s a new factory in town, Cipher - a courtesy of a little deal between Nem’ro the Hutt and your dear Empire. It’s supposed to manufacture hunters, crawlers, Jedi-killers… All the best - and nasty - stuff. You’re going to do something about it.”

Nik’s brow raised briefly as he swallowed. Of course I will. Almost empty. “I’ve been known to deal with a few Hutts,” he said. “Here I was thinking it’d almost been too long.”

“Tempting as that may be, save your thoughts of reunions.” Nik rolled his eyes and took up the glass again. “You’ll need your Cipher clearance. Security’s tight, but automated. Get inside. Get me reconnaissance. We talk again when I know what you’re dealing with, and we make this little problem disappear. Deal?”

Nik set down the glass heavily on the bartop and rolled his neck. “Thought you already knew that much, no? Hunters, killers…?”

Nothing shifted in those dark eyes. “Like you said. Try to make it worth my credits.”

“What? Your bosses not like cantina tabs on your write-offs?”

“You deal, or you don’t.” Hunter turned to leave. “We’ll know either way, Cipher. But the next round’s on you. I know how to reach you, so you’ll know where to go. Within an hour, or I might have to come looking for my credits, and your work could get very complicated.”

Nik’s narrowed eyes followed his back as he left. Vector rejoined him as the blonde turned a corner out of the cantina and beyond view. “Agent?” He could hear the mild frown on the Joiner’s face without looking for it.

“So goes our man,” Nik gestured towards the doorway lightly.

“And? We… hope you minded yourself."

Nik hummed thoughtfully. “We’ll see, I suppose. Won’t we?” He blinked and glanced back towards the bar before he dug in his pocket and tossed a few credits out by the empty glass. To cover the tab or, perhaps, to make a bet. “We shall see, my friend. Come then. I’ve a feeling Kaliyo will be jealous for not bringing her along, so we may as well make it a damn good story.”

[basketonthedoorstepofthefbi]

Spencer Reid x Read fic. Reid and Reader are friends, like best friends. Reader is always offering Reid donuts and listening to his fun facts and info dumps. It's one of those, they both like each other, but also are convinced the other doesn't like them.

Spencer is taking care of a slightly drunk reader whose grandmother called and asked why they're not engaged when they're younger sibling is married and expecting a child. At some point Spencer makes his ever classic comment about how it's safer to kiss and drunk reader, before being able to think, kisses Spencer. I hope that made sense.

OOPS I DID EXACTLY THAT

Safer to Kiss (Spencer Reid x Fem!BAU!Reader)

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!BAU!Reader

Word Count: 2899

Warnings: Mentions of food, drinking alcohol, mild cursing, outdated expectations of women, and lots of pining

A/N: Hi I wrote this in 2 hours and was extremely entertained, please enjoy and if you send me a fic request I'll probably do it bc this is my hyperfixation hobby right now and very much keeping the demons at bay xD @bxm-1012 thank you for dropping by my inbox! I am VERY tempted to make a part 2 of this, I hope you enjoy! c:

-----

The whole expiration date thing that women faced was, in your humble opinion, complete and utter bullshit. Here you were, slowly approaching thirty (definitely still told people you were twenty-five, when, in fact, you were actually twenty-eight), and the biological clock was ticking. No, you didn’t want kids. Not right now, anyway. Not when you were only two years into your career as a profiler for the FBI’s prestigious Behavioral Analysis Unit. Not when you still had tons of things to check off your bucket list - go to Europe, visit an independent bookstore in every state, pilot a helicopter. 

And you didn’t buy into that whole ‘once a woman hits thirty, her stock plummets’ crap. Not usually, anyway. 

But Nan’s phone calls always left you questioning your existence. 

Back home in Ohio, your little sister, Kendra, had just announced her pregnancy. Three years younger than you (ironically, the age you told everyone you were), and married to a power plant manager, Kendra was living the dream of a woman from the 1950s. You tried your best not to look down on it, to wish for more for her - but Kendra was happy. She’d always wanted to be a mother, and you couldn’t imagine anyone better suited for the role. There was nothing wrong with wanting to be a wife and a mother, to devoting one’s life to it. You reminded yourself of that every time you spoke to Kendra. You especially reminded yourself of it every time you spoke to Nan. 

That sympathetic tone your grandmother used when she said, “Oh, Button, you’ll find someone eventually, and you’ll be just as happy as Kenny” was like nails on a chalkboard. You resisted the urge to gag into your speakerphone and simultaneously rip your grandmother a new one. You wanted so badly to explain to her that you were perfectly fulfilled with your life. 

You helped lock up bad guys on a weekly basis, you wanted to remind Nan. Your brain was one of few that had been chosen for a task force that caught criminals based on their behavior. It was amazing, working for the BAU, bouncing ideas off of your colleagues, finding a family within this small group of people that spent more than forty hours a week together. 

Nan didn’t see it that way. She wanted you to be just like Kendra. She wanted you to have that white picket fence in the suburbs, with a broad-shouldered husband and two little tykes running at your feet. Domestic bliss just wasn’t in the cards for you, you’d decided. And that was okay.

You were still reeling from your conversation with Nan the night before when you walked in to work on Monday morning. It was Derek who caught the raging RBF first. “Woah, pretty girl. Pump. Your. Brakes.” He said, halting you just as you entered the BAU’s bullpen, holding a hand up to stop you. 

“Good morning to you, too, Derek,” You flashed him a phony grin, and he rolled his eyes. 

“And you’re grumpy this morning… why, exactly?” Derek asked, turning to walk beside you, essentially escorting you to your desk. 

“Because I’m allowed to be?” You proffered, shrugging your shoulders, not really wanting to talk about it with him. You loved Derek - hell, you loved all your coworkers - but he was not the person you wanted to go to with these thoughts. You didn’t really want to talk to anyone about it, actually. You just wanted to ride the cranky train until it came to a complete stop. 

Emily was returning from the kitchenette with a fresh mug of coffee and decided that the conversation concerned her as well. “What’s going on?” she asked. 

“Y/L/N’s wearing her cranky pants this morning,” Derek filled her in. 

“Oh, those so don’t match your blouse, Y/N,” Emily teased, winking at you with a smirk before looking at Derek. “Cut her some slack. No one likes Mondays.” Derek held up his palms defensively. “Alright, alright. Forgive me for being a concerned citizen.” 

“It’s appreciated,” You told Derek genuinely before setting your bag down at your desk. “But unnecessary.” 

It wasn’t until later in the morning, around ten, that anyone bothered you about your obvious bad mood again. This time it was Spencer, the one person you couldn’t possibly be annoyed with. He rolled on his desk chair around the partition that separated your workspaces, holding his hand out expectantly, like he usually did this time of day. 

Without speaking, you opened the bottom drawer of your desk and pulled out the white bag of mini powdered donuts that you always kept in stock. They were your guilty pleasure snack, and one of the first things you and Spencer bonded over when you started at the BAU two years ago. That, and the fact that you were the closest agents in age, was how you got along so well so quickly. Over several cases, varying in degrees of intensity, you and Spencer became really great friends. Best friends, actually. 

There wasn’t anyone else in your life that you trusted more than Spencer Reid. 

You opened the bag of powdered donuts and shook one haphazardly into Spencer’s palm, then grabbed one for yourself. Silently, you cheers-ed your donuts together, and ate them simultaneously, making weird-but-comfortable eye contact as you did. 

“Derek says you’re in a bad mood today,” Spencer pointed out with a teasing smirk on his face. A smirk, and white sugar blanketing his upper lip.

“Derek’s full of shit,” you grinned after swallowing your snack, the smile on your face totally facetious. “I’m extremely happy.” 

“I can tell,” Spencer snickered as you set the powdered donuts back in your snack drawer, closing it with a clank. You watched as he brought both of his legs up into his desk chair, crossing them like a kindergartner. 

The action made your stomach flutter. You’d felt strongly about Spencer for a really long time, probably a year and half, if you had to try and pinpoint it. But there was no use in going down that road with him. For one thing, he was your best friend, and you didn’t want to risk flushing the best relationship in your life down the toilet. For another thing, you knew it was one hundred percent impossible that he could feel the same way. 

“What’d you do this weekend?” Spencer asked, and you could tell by the question that he was trying to discover the source of your poor attitude. 

“Stayed home, caught up on chores,” You said, crossing your knees and leaning back in your seat, your expression telling him that you knew exactly what he was doing. As much fun as playing mind games with Spencer was, you decided to throw him a bone. “Spoke to my grandmother on the phone last night.” 

Spencer nodded understandingly. “Say no more,” he said with a chuckle. “She gave you the whole ‘when are you going to get married’ spiel again?” 

You nodded. “Unfortunately. I usually don’t let it bother me, but for some reason it’s just, like, lurking in the back of my mind today.” You shrugged your shoulders and exhaled through your nose. “What about you?” You asked. 

“What about me?” Spencer arched a brow, and you rolled your eyes playfully. 

“What’d you do this weekend?” 

“Oh,” Spencer began, pursing his lips for a moment, like he was hesitant to tell you. “I actually went on a date.” 

Your stomach flipped. “Oh yeah?” You choked out, forcing a smile. “Who with?” 

“That girl, Lisa, from the coffee shop, the one you told me wouldn’t stop ‘ogling my boy band hair’,” Spencer held up air quotes when he repeated your words from memory.

You recalled the cute barista from the coffee shop just down the highway from Quantico, a popular morning stop for agents on their way to work. You tried to stop the jealousy from turning your blood into fire. “How was it?” You asked, trying to resist the urge to sit on the edge of your seat, trying not to hang on his every word. 

Spencer shrugged his shoulders. “It was okay. She was very nice, but there just wasn’t…” he trailed off, gesticulating as the words failed to come to that supercomputer brain of his. 

“It was like a donut without powdered sugar on it?” You suggested with a small chuckle.

“Yeah,” Spencer agreed, nodding, meeting your eyes and smiling, mildly amused. “Exactly.” 

Spencer went back to his desk a few minutes later, and the rest of the day went on. It was quiet, especially for a day at the BAU. There were, weirdly enough, no open cases right now, so you spent the day catching up on paperwork, which there was always plenty of. 

You caught the elevator about ten minutes after five with Spencer in tow, and you held the door open for him. It was just the two of you as you made the descent from the sixth floor, and Spencer leaned against the back wall. “Plans tonight?” He asked. 

“Not really, no,” You said, shaking your head. “Why, you want to do something?” You asked. 

Spencer nodded. “There’s this landscape and nature photography exhibit at one of the galleries downtown,” he said. “Might be fun. There’s this artist, Milton Harvell, who takes photos of renowned locations around the world but zooms in on an obscure detail and gives the framed photograph to the person who correctly guesses the location.” 

You smiled slowly at that. You loved it when Spencer went off on one of his tangents. You found it completely adorable. “It’s actually quite fascinating,” Spencer went on, an amused tone lining his voice, making it sound lighter. “Kind of like a Where’s Waldo, but in reverse. There was this one photograph he took of the Louvre in Paris, but he zoomed in really tightly on a young boy enjoying an ice cream cone. He even went so far as to edit the photograph to make it look like it was a different time of day. The four thousand and eighth person to view the photograph was the person who guessed the correct location.” Spencer’s head bobbed and he was smiling like an idiot. 

God, you were down bad. 

“Was the four thousand and eighth person… you?” You asked, narrowing your eyes at him scrupulously and allowing a teasing grin to cross your face. 

“The photo’s hanging in my living room,” he confirmed. 

You laughed softly. “Will there be alcohol at this function?” You asked him, and he nodded. 

That was all you needed to hear. 

— — —

You and Spencer went straight to the art gallery from work, sharing a cab rather than bothering with your cars. You immediately bought a glass of red wine, and began to follow him around the gallery. You weren’t an art aficionado, not by any means, but you enjoyed looking at beautiful things, and you especially enjoyed spending time with Spencer that wasn’t hunched over a dead body or trying to map out a killer’s comfort zone. It was a rare occurrence, so you tried to soak it all up as much as possible. 

Plus, your Nan’s words were still lingering in the back of your head. It’ll happen for you someday, Button. Men just don’t find you strong, career types attractive. Maybe you should soften up your look a little. 

You downed your first glass of wine within ten minutes, and caught one of the catering staff passing out champagne almost instantaneously after. The champagne fizzled down your throat as you strolled with Spencer through the art gallery, listening intently as he went on about each piece, rattling off whatever contextual knowledge he had. But you were a little bit biased; you could listen to him list different types of soil and find it interesting. 

After the glass of champagne came another glass of champagne, and by the time you made it to the main exhibit Spencer wanted to see, your cheeks were flushed. It wasn’t that you couldn’t hold your alcohol; rather, it just made you a little bit silly. Your inhibitions were lowered, just like it would affect anyone. But with your arm looped through Spencer’s and your Nan’s nagging message still in the back of your mind, you were perhaps a little more loose than usual. 

As Spencer examined the exhibit, you tapped your foot, unable to keep still, and scanned the open space. Your eyes landed on another patron of the gallery, a conventionally handsome man about your age, and you found yourself unlooping your arm from Spencer’s, subconsciously not wanting to appear taken. 

“Are you gonna go talk to that guy?” Spencer asked, and you snapped your eyes back to his. “Because you can, if you want to. Don’t let me stop you.” 

It was almost like he was daring you to. Spencer’s jaw seemed tense as you examined his expression, the way his gorgeous brown eyes darted from the man and back to you. “You don’t mind?” You asked, arching a brow, almost like a challenge.

Spencer shook his head, his lips pursed. “Not at all. I’ll wait here for you?” 

You nodded, and turned towards the man. There wasn’t any harm in getting a guy’s number, right? Your feelings for Spencer were a lost cause, anyway. Plus, as Nan liked to point out, you weren’t getting any younger. 

The man’s eyes locked on yours and he seemed to understand that you were about to speak with him. He met you halfway, and you shook his hand. “Malcolm Greene,” he introduced himself, and you spouted off your own name in return. “You’re not here with that guy?” He asked, jerking his chin over to Spencer. Your eyes followed Malcolm’s, and you saw Spencer with his body turned towards the photography exhibit, but his head turned to the side, as if he were keeping an eye on you with his peripheral vision. 

“Yeah, I am,” you said, and Malcolm’s head inclined to the side. “I am. I’m here with that guy,” you panicked, suddenly realizing in that moment that you weren’t interested in speaking with Malcolm. No, you had absolutely no interest in spending your time with any other man but Spencer Reid. “I just, uh…” Your cheeks flushed, and you stifled an awkward laugh, anxiously trying to come up with some excuse. “I came over here to tell you that your shoe was united.” 

Your eyes followed Malcolm’s down to his shoes, which were loafers. Laceless loafers. Malcolm’s mouth opened as if to point this out to you, but you managed to stammer words out first. “Ok, well, have a great night, goodbye!” You turned on your heel and marched back over to Spencer, your cheeks red as you reached out for his arm. 

Spencer furrowed his brows down at you as your arm gripped his. “I need another glass of wine,” you confessed. 

Twenty minutes later, after two more glasses of wine and a very watchful eye out for Malcolm, you and Spencer left the art gallery. You were awfully giggly on the cab ride back to your place, cracking puns and humming along to the radio intermittently. Spencer seemed to be amused, but more so concerned with getting you home in one piece. 

As he walked you up the stairs to the door of your apartment building, he was teasing you about your conversation with Malcolm, which you still hadn’t told him completely about. “I still can’t believe you didn’t get his number. You were talking with him for exactly two minutes and twelve seconds. What, in that short of an amount of time, could have turned you off to him so quickly?” He pondered aloud, a playfully mocking tone lining his voice. 

“Listen, I shook his hand! I had my fun!” You exclaimed, bursting into laughter as you leaned against the handrail of the stairs that led up to the door. “Good, clean fun!” 

“You know, the number of pathogens that are passed during a handshake is staggering. It’s actually safer to kiss someone,” Spencer rattled off, and your eyes snapped to meet his. 

You don’t know what took you over. Maybe it was the wine. Maybe it was the way the street lamps reflected in the irises of his eyes, or how you stood just a few inches away from him. Maybe it was his stupid tweed blazer, how he looked like a tenured art history professor despite barely being thirty years old. Maybe it was the way he smelled like pine and printer ink, a combination you wouldn’t have ever thought was attractive. 

But when Spencer said that, you stood up on your toes and kissed him. It was slow and innocent at first, until it passed the border into lingering, and Spencer’s hands found your hips, pulling your body closer to his. There was a cool night breeze that filtered through the space between your bodies, and by the time you pulled your lips away from Spencer’s, and slowly opened your eyes, you were completely red in the face and breathless. 

No, that certainly wasn’t the safest choice you could have made.

——

read part 2 here

[on-a-lucky-tide]

Greetings, Father! I just wanted to come by to say I've been reading some of your fics again and 🤌 as always, I am blown away by how good it is. Genuinely, reading them always refresh my mind in some ways (?) cuz it's interesting and the dynamic and flow you do is just so vast and yet so very you.

I do have a question and you're free to answer this ask privately or dm or not, I don't mind xD I am curious on your thought process whenever you write smutty fics, what are the things you fuss over? or what are some things you do to keep the vibes going. For me personally, I don't write a lot of spicy stuff but when I do it's hard for me to really capture the raw need and intimacy a lot of the time (not to mention I have this issue where I like writing the buildup and tension than the actual intercourse part LMAO)

Have a good day/night ahead! o7 I've got a few things I wanna draw from your posts so stay tune too hehe :3

Your tags are always amazing; I wake up and read them over my morning coffee and eggs. So good when other fans of the same skrunkly arseholes love your work about said skrunkly arseholes.

Also, your writing is bloody brilliant. Like, the thing you wrote for Nekro? Blew my brain out. It was gorgeous.

As for the smut...

I use personal experience and what I focus on. I find human bodies very fuckin' sexy, even the bits that other people might think are gross (or they might be embarrassed by). The bits they get coy/shy about me touching, the most intimate parts of them. Yeah those are what I want and they're going in my mouth. Admiring all their unique bits, their freckles, the pattern of their hair, the scars and the stretch marks, their curves and bumps. Arousal, for me, should be represented as similar to hunger; instinctual. Because that's how it processes for me.

If you like the build up, then focusing on the sweet relief of it, the dirty talk - "finally got what you need, baby? does that feel good?" - and how that intimacy of being inside someone (or having them inside you), feeling their heartbeat, listening to their little moans, feeling them tense up involuntarily and wiggle cause it feels so good, watching their bodies give or flex into your hands.

I say "you" here. I can't write x reader, but... ya get the idea.

Write one character like they're starving and tucking into a buffet, I guess?

I have varying levels of "hunger" on the dial. I don't tend to get as visceral in longer works because of the "flow" of the narrative. Like, 15k of narrative and then a sudden 7k of one character gobbing on another's dick would be funny and jarring, but, eh.

[flightfoot]

Marinette Completed Angst Fic Reclist

I know some people really like this genre, so I figured I'd make a list for it! These will obviously all be completed, and none of them will be bashing fics, and PLEASE don't rec any fics on this post that are bashing fics, I don't want to see them.

Some of these will have my own commentary about the fic attached to it, for if I've put them on a previous reclist where I had that commentary written out. But a lot of the older fics won't.

For a fic to count for this, the angst Marinette goes through can't just be her being upset about what someone else is going through, though the angst of the fic doesn't only need to be hers, so long as she has her own angst which is a decently prominent part of the fic.

---

one does not love breathing by @wackus-bonkus-maximus

All of Paris watched as Hawkmoth murdered Chat Noir, taking the Black Cat Miraculous for himself. Ladybug swears revenge, but her enemy—and every miraculous in his possession—disappear without a trace.

Six years later, a new team of villains launches an attack for the last remaining Miraculous: Volpina, armed with new powers; Queen Bee, with questionable loyalty; Argos, the new holder of the Peacock Miraculous; and Cat Walker, who Ladybug hates the most.

Takes place after S4 - Strike Back.

This is a simply phenomenal fic. You get to explore a lot of different perspectives, like Felix, Kagami, Marinette, and Adrien’s, just to name a few, and see their different thought processes and plans and priorities, and how it can cause their plans to collide with each other, even when they all ultimately are aiming for a good outcome for everyone. The characters are pretty complex and can mess up at times, even when they’re doing things (or not doing things, looking at you Luka) with the best of intentions. It was a joy to read and a real nail-biter the whole time, I actually wrote a fic for it halfway through just to resolve some of the tension for myself, One Does Not Love Shadows.

It also features the version of Luka I’ve connected best with to date, as he feels like Luka, but also is a lot more fleshed out, and can make some major errors while simply trying to avoid missteps. It’s helped me get a better handle on a character who I’ve generally had a lot of problems with really understanding.

It is an M-rated fic, though I think Wackus is being overly cautious on that front. There’s no sexual content and I wouldn’t put the violence or gore above a T-rating, so I wouldn’t let the rating scare you off.

---

you don’t even know me at all (but I was made for loving you) by @ladyofthenoodle

They didn’t remember each other. The hospital told them there’d been an accident—brain damage—but Alya had told them the truth, later. Who’d they’d been to each other. What they’d given up, and why. But even with their memories of each other gone, Adrien and Marinette are still inextricably tied together—by law, by their social circles, and by their hearts. And in the apartment they share, there’s only one bed.

Yep, it’s the “there was only one bed” trope XD! I especially love how it was used here, how Adrien and Marinette are strangers now but they had a whole life together, and they pine for each other even without remembering, and how Marinette just can’t believe how in love with her Adrien is even though he doesn’t remember her. I loved the emotional turmoil the two of them went through together in the fic, and the resolution, it’s great!

---

fine line by @bbutterflies

“Catwalker?” Loveybug asks. “Hmm?” “Do you remember… what happened before us?” “What do you mean?” “Before we were heroes. Was there someone else?” Catwalker goes quiet for a moment. “I don’t know,” he finally says.

This is a surprisingly angsty take on the Loveybug AU. Here, since the Loveybug and Cat Walker transformations are so unnatural, they’re having negative side effects on Marinette and Adrien, causing them to be constantly exhausted and even to get amnesia the longer they continue using them.

---

do you think I have forgotten about you? by @roseinaugust

Based on the song ‘About You’ by The 1975. Memory Loss. Told in alternating time lines, one leading up to and one dealing with the aftermath of Marinette relinquishing the Miracle Box and the guardianship. Marinette struggles with her life after losing her memory, though there is a persistent voice that calls to her that always seems just out of reach in her memory.

Beautiful memory loss fic here, with seeing Ladybug’s and Chat Noir’s relationship before she gave up the Miracle box, juxtaposed with the present day, when Adrien is only a stranger to her. I could really feel how Marinette was struggling with navigating these new circumstances, with her friends seeming to expect her to remember, to be who she was to them, to Adrien especially, before, and her just… not knowing whether she can do that. It’s got a happy ending though, for those who are concerned about that.

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Our Tales Are Endless (That’s Why I Tell Them) by @joonapeach

Marinette lives a simple life - one surrounded by pretty dresses, fresh macaroons, and the calming view of Paris. It’s a life she thinks she has always fit in. And yet sometimes, when a certain boy comes by her shop with a flower and a new adventurous story, she can’t help but wonder if there’s something else she’s missing.

This was a truly gorgeous story. It’s the classic “Marinette gives up the Miracle Box and loses her memories” storyline, exploring her life two years later. Even though she’s had time to heal and recover, she still feels like she’s missing something, something big. At least Adrien’s stopping by regularly to tell her stories about Ladybug and Chat Noir, even if she doesn’t understand why they resonate with her so well.

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I (Wish I) Knew You by @buggachat

University has been hard on Marinette. Making new friends and maintaining her grades is a lot easier said than done when she has to disappear at odd times to fight akumas. She's struggling, and with Alya away with family and Adrien painfully out of reach, she's never felt lonelier.

If only she could talk to someone who really understood her struggles... but it's not like Chat Noir would know anything about loneliness. Right?

Nice aged-up Ladynoir fic here! Marinette’s struggling with losing friends and lovers because of her flakiness due to her superhero activities, until at last she breaks down. Thankfully, Chat Noir’s there at least - and it soon turns out he’s got problems of his own that he’s been hiding.

There’s some fluff and angst, it’s mostly just the two of them navigating life, dealing with their feelings and talking things out.

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If I Let Myself Love You by @uptoolateart

It’s hard to be a normal girl with a normal life when your mother has terminal cancer. And when fashion model Adrien Agreste moves back to Paris and wants to be Marinette’s friend – or maybe even more – her life is turned upside down again.

How can she risk opening her heart to love when her whole world is falling apart? Especially when Adrien is hiding a dark secret of his own….

- COMPLETE FIC – updates on Sundays

*** No kwamis AU - 100% Adrinette. About half of it is fluffy and half heavy. Please read tags for trigger warnings. ***

This fic can be rough, definitely pay attention to the tags. There’s no villains in this story, it mostly centers around themes of dealing with illness - both being sick and having a loved one who’s terminally ill - and death, grieving someone who’s lost, and how difficult that can be. It can get pretty gut-wrenching at times, especially as you slowly discover more layers of what’s really going on, what both Adrien and Marinette are hiding, both from others and from themselves in order to help cope with their circumstances. But they still move forwards together, regardless.

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Between the Heavens and the Embers by @readersmoon

Everyone in Paris remembers the fateful night of January 16, when the city was attacked by the most powerful and destructive akuma ever created. The assault, which lasted for hours, resulted in the death of 439 people.

Marinette Dupain-Cheng was among the casualties.

Years later, Adrien hasn't been able to move on, haunted by the memories of her broken body. So, when the opportunity to leave Paris for a while presents itself, he doesn't hesitate. But this trip might end up giving him more than he ever dreamt of.

This is a fantastic fic, though a serious and a dark one - make sure to mind the tags, and it’s M-rated for a reason. Vee - or rather, Marinette - is going through a horror story here. Imagine finding out that your life is a lie, that everyone you thought you could trust was manipulating you, that you were just being continually gaslit for years. 

As for Adrien, Alya, and Nino... well, none of them took Marinette’s “death” all that well, especially Adrien. Finding out that she’s been alive all this time, in these horrible circumstances, and they had no clue... it’s hard on them as well.

I love how this fic goes into how much trauma everyone has even after the immediate danger’s dealt with, you don’t just walk off this kind of experience, especially with how many years this lasted.

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in case you don’t know me tomorrow by @thelibraryloser:

“We live in a crazy world where pieces of our lives can be erased like they never even happened. I just wanted to memorize this moment so… so I could keep it, if that makes sense.”

Adrien’s heart gave a little flutter. She wanted to keep this moment, meeting him. She wanted to keep… him.

“I understand exactly what you mean.“

In a world that has created a way to selectively delete memories, no moment is truly safe. So how do you hold on to something when the memory of it is gone? And how do you keep fighting for someone when you’re the only one who remembers?

This is a SEVERELY underrated fic. It’s got some shades of “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind” in the world, though the plot is very different - the memory erasure ain’t willing. 

Basically, the first few chapters are establishing Adrien’s and Marinette’s romance, and then the rest of the fic is dealing with Gabriel being an absolute DICK and using any means at his disposal to break them apart. It’s fantastic and I highly recommend reading it!

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hella enchanted by @xiueryn:

Years ago, Marinette’s father died and she was left with her awful stepmother. With magic forcing her to obey every command, she lived as a servant and gave up hope. When a man appears, searching for the very fairy that blessed her, Marinette decides to give life one more try. AU.

(a different ella enchanted au.)

Even though it’s a one-shot this one is pretty long, clocking in at over 30k words. Absolutely worth a shot, though. The first third is basically Marinette dealing with being pushed around because of her “blessing”, and the other two-thirds is just some adorable fluff of her and Adrien touring the country together. 

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Echoes of You by kittinoir

In the day time, she's Marinette - a normal girl, with a normal life. A normal girl, with a normal life. A normal girl, with... Not Season 4 Compliant; please, no spoilers

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balancing act by fictionalinfinity

“Besides, being Ladybug always came first. It came before school, friends, and sometimes even family. Now it had to come before her health. Marinette had a duty to Paris. She wouldn’t let them down.” Or, being both Ladybug and the Guardian starts to take its toll on Marinette. - the epilepsy au literally no one asked for

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Some Days by @merrygreenie

Some days are worse, and others are a little better, little by little and day by day. Marinette Dupain-Chen is learning how to live her new normal after living in confinement and being tortured by Hawkmoth. She is thankful to have her friends and family to support her. And a very special Chat who loves her very much. *This story contains scenes of violence and torture this is a whump fic*

This fic has some great angst, but be warned, it's not kidding about the violence and torture. Honestly, it should probably be rated M instead of Teen, given that while the fic mostly takes place after Marinette escapes and while she's recovering, we do get a detailed flashback to her torture.

[criminal-sen]

Hello!! Going back to that post about being ok with people asking you about your fic... can I? 🙏 I'm gonna 🫣

So when I first found Imperfect, I hadn't watched Bleach in... dunno... 10-15 years?? Gawd don't wanna think about it. So, I'd forgotten a lot of stuff, and I hadn't finished the last 3-4 seasons. So I thought a lot of stuff you wrote about was canon, and when I rewatched it all for the upcoming 3rd part of tybw, I was like... so when are you guys gonna mention this??

But anyway, focusing on the actual question, how did you come up with all the little details about Mayuri? Like the way he talks to AJ in their own internal world, the microdosing of Super Human drug in daily life and they way it feels, the ability to smell pheromones... it makes the story, which is already awesome, much more realistic to me. It's almost like he wrote it himself, it's so, so enjoyable. Love it sm, you already know 😊

Anyway, no pressure to answer, just been thinking about it for a while and thought I'd chance it!

Aw that's so cool u mistook my stuff for canon, I feel like it's Highest Honor for ff to be believable enough to trick someone>:3c Tho I'm sure it was kinda frustrating too, sorry for that haha (and I've also been fooled so I very much understand the feeling)

Future Sen here: when I say I'm long-winded, this is what I'm talking about. This is like.. the textbook definition of Verbose. So under a cut it goes, have fun with soooooo many words:D

Hmm so the microdosing Superhuman Drug just popped into my head right before I wrote it in (chapter... 5? I think? Where he's sitting in the hotel after a flashback), I think I was having a bit of a conundrum on how he could sit there and have such a long and detailed flashback in such a short time? And before I could do the obvious fix of having more time pass, as literally nothing was at stake time-wise, I remembered the Superhuman Drug exists. And the more I thought about it, the more sense it made for him to use it, to the point where I choose believe it's canon unless proven otherwise XD Like you can't tell me someone whose whole thing is Thinking wouldn't jump at the opportunity to do more of it in less time. As for the way it feels, hmmm idk, I just thought real hard and made it up. All we know from canon is what he explained to Szayel, and what Szayel experienced, which is just. Brain thinks faster, making time feel as though it's passing slower. And od'ing on it is Real Bad💀

Hheeeehooo What Next>:3 (btw im having a blast rn, ty for giving me a free pass to be sooooo long winded about this very niche thing XD) Right, Jizo communication here we go>:33333 So him talking to Jizo was based on what I read in a wiki about the Zanpakuto... rebellion arc? I think it's called (could definitely be wrong)? Where everyone's zanpakuto spirit is running amok? I just remember reading he didn't speak. And though I have mixed feels about the design (hence he is Moth in my fic XD), him not speaking really made sense to me. He just seems like such a fucked up little guy🤔 Like.. okay so I've mentioned this briefly in a chapter preface but want to elaborate... so I strongly believe he consents to being modified, cuz even Mayuri would probably have a hard time wielding a zanpakuto that fucking hates him. Which means he's loyal (arguably to a fault) and trusts Mayuri to do very fucked up and painful things to him. Which, to be fair, Mayuri does equally painful and fucked up things to his own body.. and that makes me wonder if Jizo isnt merely consenting but is of the same mind about this fuckery? Like idk if I can even say this in a way that makes sense🤦‍♂️ but I like to think they share this no-holds-barred, nothing-is-sacred delight for experimenting on themselves. Like Jizo is also a mad scientist in all but name>:3 (I decided on this version bc it Fucks Severly imho, but also bc it's FAR less depressing than the overly-trusting, Stockholm syndrome one, like i cannot deal with writing something that sad tbfh) Anyway, regardless of which version, he is an intensely weird Creachure. And I just can't fathom him saying fucking.. anything... that would even remotely make sense to anyone but Mayuri??? And the telepathy thing just fits Mayuri's whole.. fast thinking, Big Brain vibe. If a zanpakuto were to impart information to him through words, I can see him tapping his foot like GET TO THE POINT>:(

Lastly, the pheromone thing.. haha well this one's pretty short (future Sen here, i am a liar! It is not short😬) - I borrowed it from another ff. It's that one I mentioned at the end of.. who knows which chapter... Quantum Mechanics by Illegitimi (no link, sorry, might put one after i post)... which was Mayuri/Isane, and which I loved So Much back in the day, despite hetero romance being kind of a fuckin.. icky vibe for me in regards to Mayuri. No problem with it fyi, just usually wouldn't choose to read about it. Ugh I'm talking too much about it already but I have changed a LOT since.. 2016? Give or take? And I don't think I could stand it nowadays for a whole bunch of reasons. But. BUT. It was very well written and had some very cool hcs for him that I've clung onto. The pheromone one just fits him - if he could sharpen his ability to sense something, ofc he'd do it - plus it's very fun for romance and smut reasons, which is undoubtedly why the author thought of it. They also had that scar across his nose, though iirc it was kinda squiggly and not the upside down V that I made up. In my defense though, there's a lot I didn't borrow from that fic, too. Some highlights: Mayuri practiced feng-shui (like he'd spend his precious Sciencing time to do smth like that smh) he had these absolutely luxurious captains quarters, complete with a whole fancy bathhouse, like there was a waterfall and shit nsvdhshdv (I'll admit this was quite fun in the ff but i obviously interpret his quarters a lot differently)... and, last one I mention I promise😬 his paint rubbed off easily, big reason why I changed it tbfh cuz it immediately didn't make sense to me, like his hands especially? Is that different paint than the rubbing off paint? Or does he leave paint on every surface he touches, and discreetly wipe it up and reapply before anyone notices???? Expmain yourself, ff writer😤 jk jk it was really good for what it was, and I still very much appreciate it for helping me form my version<3

Omfg I really... shit what time is it😭 (over an hour, I've been sitting here for over an HOUR jesus fucking.. goddamn) Okay well I don't get to blab v often about this stuff, and it turns out I have a LOT of words in me today! So it was a perfect storm😩 Well I hope this was enlightening, thanks sm for the ask, it was a very fun hour lol. And sorry for the uhhh. the amount of words:p

[colourfulshadows]

Thinking about The Drop™ again. Long and weird post, sorry, with a thought experiment more than a real theory I guess. Wrote this at 3 am when I couldn't sleep xD

I'm not going to argue that Lestat's abuse toward Louis (and Claudia, but focusing on Louis in this) is OOC in general. In fact, I think it fits his character, his impulsiveness and works with the themes of "being a monster" and his abandonment issues triggering that behaviour (I'm not excusing his behaviour, just trying to explain it).

But

The Drop?

(CW for SA)

I know I know that Lestat even acknowledged it himself during the trial (well, the lestat from louis's retelling) and I'm not saying that Louis is lying that Lestat did abuse him to that extent. But the drop feels OOC for me. Sometimes I wonder if it's all a metaphor for another similar horrid thing Lestat might have done instead. Because there's this thing with him not possessing the cloud gift at that point in the books.

I have that thought that maybe... What if Lestat SA'd Louis? And Louis didn't feel safe to tell Daniel that after hearing how Daniel spoke about Claudia in that context? Who knows the books, knows that Lestat canonically SA'd someone. It would recontextualise a lot. The flying in S1E1 during lovemaking? A metaphor for part of the sex, maybe even subspace. Louis letting his rage/revenge at Lestat out through violent hate sex with *stabbing* of all things? Louis looks almost dissociated during sex in the "distracting Lestat so Claudia can plot" phase but not during kisses etc. Then there's the way Louis doms Armand later.

What if actual flying = something very intimate in the show (yes well I don't think it's far fetched to think Santiago would be an exhibitionist then). Armand having to fly up to fetch books for Louis. Armand's aerobic evening in the back of the theatre. Armand flying up the stairs before revealing his past to Louis. Armand descending from the bookcases in "no pain" after rashid left, but showing Daniel is all right (could be wrong with the order of events in that scene though).

Armand makes Daniel fly and crash on the ground in 1973 and afterwards Daniel has this extra haunted expression.

I'm probably overthinking everything. I don't think that's actually canon. I just like to analyse and theorise. It's crazy and far fetched and has plot holes but that tiny corner of my brain is saying "but what if it's not?"

If we were still on the internet of 2010 I'd say "thank you for reading all this, here's a cookie *gives cookie*"

[galaxostars]

If you had to choose your top five favourite marauders era characters and ships, what would they be?

This question was actually so hardddd haha and I feel like you could ask me again in a month and my answer would be different bc I’m such a multishipper that… yeah xD but for now here it issss :

Fave characters :

1. James Potter : mhm I love myself an arrogant goofball who’s actually smarter than people give him credit for, who’s got so much love he’s impulsive with it and hurts the ones he loves, who doesn’t know what to do with the loneliness that grips him sometimes, who defines himself by his ability to help people, who rarely allows himself to express himself negatively (ex : sadness/anger/frustration) because if there’s one thing that he fears the most, it’s hurting people. Plus, he hasn’t got any trauma or anything so why should he complain, yk?

Basically I love a good flawed James, and the sort of character where you wouldn’t expect him to have issues yk

2. Sirius Black : I mean… cmon do I even need to explain? ‘Cause if I start idk when I’ll stop, like literally. Ive had a crush on this character since I was eleven and never grew out of it, its almost embarrassing if it wasn’t completely justified (and the only reason he’s not number one is just because I write him less than James so I feel like I know him less intimately but like if you’d have asked me before I started writing I’d have put him number one for sure)

3. Regulus Black : !!!!! sorry but indoctrinated younger ‘abandoned’ (in between quotes bc he was not Sirius’ responsibility and Sirius was right to save himself but it’s also very normal for regulus to feel that way etc etc… we know the drill) sibling who’s faced with sudden delusion about this superior figure he’s followed/served, everything he’s lost in the process, and who redeems himself by going on this suicide mission that ends up being useless? (And unknown by Sirius AHHHH.) The guy is literally so smart and technically such a loser bc he doesn’t serve much for the plot and that’s what compelled me so much the first time I read hp 😭 he’s so tragic I love it

4. Narcissa Black : younger sibling; once again similar pattern to regulus but she survived, she’s so smart I’m, like, shaky in the knees, (esp i love female characters who do what they have to do to survive), she’s powerful too, and jkr is shit at writing female characters and I will never not be pissed abt it but I do think cissa was very compelling (+ Helen McCrory’s acting game was sooo perfect), very protective of her family and will stop at nothing to protect them, and that’s a value I respect so much. I will say, in general, any member of the black family is very compelling to me. Bellatrix would come right after narcissa in terms of fave from that family.

5. Barty Crouch Jr : listen if you know me, you know I’m… idk how to define myself actually, but I like unhinged stuff so. This is like. Peak unhingedness. Paired with intelligence bc we know canonically that man was smart af, and daddy issues? Dark hair, too? You just described my type. He’s even more compelling in tragic storylines (like past bartylus and barty joining Voldemort for regulus and then faced w the delusion and the grief? Gut wrenching) so yup.

Favorite pairings :

1. Moonshine (remus/james) : I know this sounds weird but a certain fanfic re wrote my brain chemistry and ever since then I’ve been obsessed. I just think they’re so tragically beautiful together. They’re both very selfless beings that just give and give and never prioritize themselves and together it’s a mess. They keep hurting each other because they’re so selfless, they’re not very good at reading each other and they let their insecurities get the best, they’re both frightened of how much they love, of the other not wanting them, of needing to « tame » their emotions. I love them.

2. Prongsfoot : FUCKING FOAMING AT THE MOUTH ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? Together they’re. They. Just. I hate them bc of how much I love them if that makes sense. They’re everything. A law of the universe and whatnot. I love everyyyy fucking version of them. They make me cry they make me scream they make me smile they make me laugh, they’re literally my comfort ship.

3. Jegulus : they’re kind of the pairing that made me join the fandom, and though I don’t read them as much as I used to, they’ll always make me so soft. Enemies to lovers? Yeah, well I’m not immune yk. Best friend’s brother? Even better. Tragic and doomed? Yeah sign me the fuck up. I will say I like them just as much when it’s jegulily, but that’s also because I think poly relationships are so complex and compelling.

4. Moonwater : and not platonic haha, i have to say that basically i ship anyone who’s very smart imo with regulus, and Remus passes the test. Plus he’s also introverted, a book nerd, done with James and Sirius so i feel like they could bond very easily. I prefer them in a non canon sitting tho for some reason, but yeah I’m. So fond of them. They get into heated debates. Even their ship name is so dear to me because, that’s like both their biggest fears and pairing them in one name feels like they can overcome them if they’re together ? 😭 it’s so sweet (plus, it allows me to ship prongsfoot on the side lmfao)

5. Regulily : same reasoning as up there but like they’re probs the only het pairings that I really really love. i never expected them to be so important (but *cough cough* disintegration happened…) but honestly they make a lot of sense? I feel like Regulus would be more confident with Lily, and Lily would feel more calm with Regulus? They’re that scary hot powerful quiet couple yk. Anddd they can bond over siblings angst lmao.

[murfpersonalblog]

IWTV S2 Ep8 Musings - Loumand (Spoilers)

This was so effed up, wow; I'm FURIOUS with Armand, even though I've been expecting this from him since Season 1. Cuz the ish he said just never lined up right; the most unreliable narrator's been Armand the whole time! Louis' brain is scrambled, but at least he's SINCERE. But THIS mofo has been deliberately LYING since JUMP.

Longest divorce proceedings ever--took 77 years, dang. Armand said it was the night Madeleine was turned--Mr. They Gave Me A Choice. I Chose. But that's a effing lie, too!

Cuz in Ep6, BEFORE Louis even told Armand he was gonna turn Madz, Santiago was busy committing all those "strange crimes reported;" climbing the Eiffel Tower to wake up Lestat, and breaking into cinemas to steal their color film reels for the Trial's projector.

They threw Sam under the bus as if HE wrote effed up Trial script--but THIS was when they actually started writing it--with ARMAND's input & direction.

But I'm jumping ahead.

WTF is going on here?! O_O Is this a human the Theatre keeps around for the plays, zoned out so they stay alive until they're on stage? So Armand's punishment is the shame of having to feed the "cattle"? And HOW MANY nights was Lou in there? :(

Louis was locked up for over a MONTH!? 😨 While Armand just SAT THERE?!

Lou's not screaming from starvation, MORON--he starved himself for YEARS. His DAUGHTER is DEAD.

The frame of Paul is wild--Louis was ready to end it all. U_U He didn't want to be "rescued"--he wanted his baby girl back. "What was left to endure for?"

Man's a consummate actor--everything you're about to see is FAKE.

A "sacrifice" for the "god" Armand serves, eh? (AMC got my guy out here sucking on rocks, omg. XD I hope they taste like chips or popcorn or something.)

Louis CONSTANTLY shushing people on this show, I love it!

LIES. Lou's WAY too good for Armand; I'd've been like SURPRISE! 🔥 "My rage and madness were asleep--" chile. You loved Armand, and thought he'd cared enough to save you, which is why you were able to swallow that weak AF I Could Not Prevent It excuse from a 500 yr old vamp.

Daniel is on the hunt! I LOVE how they're introducing Raglan like he's just some kindly ole assistant/researcher/editor. Honey, you've got a big storm coming! "Reciprocation"--Daniel's a vampire now, so you KNOW Raglan's gonna start cashing in them I-O-Us from Dan! 💀

77 years later.... 😬

200 years is a mighty long time to maintain a relationship built on death threats, power imbalances, and lies.

Lestat was right--even 77 years was a effing miracle--extra time bought at the price of Louis' memories being oh-so-conveniently erased.

THEY rehearsed it--LIE. There Armand goes, deflecting culpability.

Louis sleeping in Claudia's coffin, stop, my feels. U_U

Omfg Armand; of COURSE you don't remember the last thing y'all said to e/o in Paris b4 y'all left Lestat to travel Egypt--but you can "remember" alllll this other bullcrap, eh?

So they've already done Trinity Gate?

BY ALL MEANS. EXPOSE THEM.

Not Sam being in Daftpunk, y'all need to stop IMMEDIATELY. (But now I know wtf was going on in the Season 3 announcement--I was so confused why they were mentioning Sam!)

ARMAND told the coven to let the audience read Claudia's diaries and VIOLATE her body (of work), omfg 😱

Mr Frankenstein disrespected her at EVERY turn!

I could forgive spitting over "Come to Me" and how Loustat met in NOLA, but I draw the line at spitting at adding the animation of Lestat killing that dear sweet racoon! XD

Armand had the NERVE to look away when they bum-rushed Claudia & Louis with the Mind Gift.

"It's their turn to hurt--" ARMAND said he didn't think Louis would love him for 200 years, so he SOLD THEM TF OUT--to DIE.

They were HOBBLING AROUND WITH GASHED ANKLES, LAUGHED at, and stuffed in RAT BOXES! And ARMAND was in on the whole thing!

This is WILD, AMC, y'all are sick for this, but I love it!

Is DANIEL using Armand's "slave name" and abusing him, y'all? HUH? It's all BULLCRAP--Armand's BEEN in control, with all the real power the WHOLE. EFFING. TIME.

EFF what you call him, or whatever kinky ROLES he PLAYS.

ARMAND decides who lives and dies, as THE coven master--eff who's called Maitre!

Armand was gonna let Lou DIE. "He just took credit for it when the opportunity presented itself." Wow.

He let Louis suffer in that crypt for over a MONTH before he FINALLY had a change of hear/conscience and pulled him out!

And even then he wasn't gonna go WITH Louis--he expected Louis to flee Paris! ALONE.

He stayed with Louis cuz Louis destroyed his whole effing coven! Who else did Armand HAVE but Louis after that? HE CHOSE THE COVEN.

Poor dear; he wasn't held enough between ritualistic fledgling executions. 🙄😒 "We are teachers of one another! Louis, everything that gives you happiness gives me...." WHAT? What does it give you, Armand? (I cannot WAIT for S3 to do more DM, cuz I've been HATING Armand connected in any way to Louis & Claudia. I don't like not liking Armand; he's my fave book character! But AMC's bound & determined to make me spit every time he starts talking.)

Excellent grounds to get the house, the dog, the Farm, Damek, AND Rashid in the divorce! XD

And this gremlin's got the audacity to STILL be lying, even when caught LITERALLY red-handed with his notes to Santiago in the effing margins--meanwhile CLAUDIA was CONDEMNED TO DEATH for premeditating Lestat's death in HER written diaries--which ARMAND had passed around like candy at his carnival of horrors!

"An insignificant detail delivered by an insignificant mortal"--Rolin must hate Armand, he's not giving this dude an INCH. XD And SAM delivered it, not Daniel. SAM snitched on the coven. (WHEN?! And WHY?)

I don't like the whole "you should fear the other one--" only for Raglan to be like SOS GET OUT OF THERE NOW. Didn't Raglan know Armand was lying his arse off? Or was it misdirection--fear Louis' retribution when he busts a cap in Armand's lying arse?

DanLou nation RISE! ^0^

This was beautiful; I'm so happy for them. They started off TERRIBLY, but look at that bond just blossom like a magnolia tree Armand tried to clip and prune and graft and manipulate--only for it to flourish wild and free!

[altraviolet]

Hello Violet!!!

So I've been wondering about The Echo Garden, when you started it did you have a plan in mind? I think you get these sorts of questions often but, did you ever intend for it to get this big? And one final thing, when you went into The Echo Garden did you edit it as you go or did you write the whole thing out and then edited it? I love your work by the way, keep it up!

Hi potato-sauce!

[googles "potato sauce" to see if that's a thing, finds Czech recipe. oh hell yeah, that looks really good]

:D

>did you have a plan in mind?

I had the very rough plan of "Soundwave needs to go from not feeling to feeling, and then on the side I need to develop Soundwave/Rodimus in a realistic way against the backdrop of the Lost Light." Sub plans included "make the other alt-dimensioners each have a problem that SW solves" and "make the LL bots have different reactions to SW" and "uhhhhh he needs a hobby. crystals?"

My method of writing is more "discovery" than "planned," or at least it was until the end of the fic. Until, say around ch 40ish, I had Vague Ideas for what needed to happen in each chapter, and so I'd write them [aka each ch needs to complete X goals to push the narrative forward], and then as I went, my brain somehow magically sewed almost everything up together. Once it got towards the end of the fic, I could 'see' where things needed to end up. But even then, things were quite fluid when it came to sitting down and typing up any given chapter.

>did you ever intend for it to get this big?

No. I had no intentions at all. I didn't even have a GUESS or a THOUGHT it would get this big. The pairing was SO weird, I thought maybe 2 people would read it. Maybe. One of them has been with me since the beginning, and the other is a friend. I was SO sure everyone would go "pff weird" and skip over it. I was really nervous posting it, actually.

Keep in mind that the pairing is fairly well-known now, and that also a lot of people extrapolated soundrod from Cyberverse. so it doesn't feel weird now. BUT IT WAS INCREDIBLY WEIRD when I posted Ch 1

>when you went into The Echo Garden did you edit it as you go or did you write the whole thing out and then edited it?

I wrote it out over the period of 4 years and posted chapters as they were finished. anyone who read along as it was being posted would never know when a chapter would drop xD I tried very hard not to let too much time elapse between chapters, but sometimes there were large gaps. and other times I'd post 3 chapters within a week. I got too excited to dole them out more slowly, haha. I was bursting to share :D chapters usually came out on Sunday nights or around USA holidays, because I needed some temporal distance from my job in order to get my brain working

I don't think I could've finished the fic if I had fully written it out and then posted it. the comments I got while it was an ongoing WIP helped boost me and made me feel so happy, and that what I was doing was important and worth my time, and worth something to other people. without comments, the Echo Garden probably never would have been finished. that's why I always tell people to comment! especially on ongoing WIPs that you love. it's so encouraging and helpful for authors to know that their hard work is being enjoyed!

anyway I wrote each chapter and then edited the HECK out of it and then posted it when I was done. I also wrote a lot of things out of order, so sometimes when I got to the next chapter, I could grab a chunk of writing from my 'already written scenes' doc and then write around it to sew it into the existing story

the only editing I did after the fic was completely done was going through and fixing grammar/related mistakes. there are a couple things I would change, structurally, if I were going to go through and really edit it, as one should do with a novel. technically, the version on AO3 right now is the first draft! the fic could be edited further, but I'm going to let it stand where it is =)

thanks for the ask! cheers :)

[sotwk]

Hi Naneth! Do you know and/or play D&D? So...I've recently started playing it and got addicted to the game (surprisingly for someone who's always been a bookworm than a gamer hehe), and now I can't help but be curious what would the Thranduillions (maybe bonus Thranduil and his wife?) be like as D&D characters (or what kind of characters would they create and play as during D&D sessions)? Ooooh, now I wonder what a Thranduillion D&D session would look like XD!

Omg it's amazing that you asked me this question, because literally just this morning I was chatting with my sister about her starting to play tabletop D&D with her old college buddies! I said to her, "Man I'm jealous and I wish I could join in, but I would just be so lost and confused and annoying because I'll need everything explained to me multiple times." XD My sister is also trying to get me to play BG3, and although it's really, really tempting, I'm afraid even venturing into that would take up what little free time I have left!

Anyway, going into your question that I LOVE so much, about what the Thranduilions would be like if they had a D&D session. Using my limited knowledge of the actual gameplay, it would go something like this:

The Royal House of Greenwood Plays Dungeons & Dragons

Characters Chosen

Everyone in the family prefers to play Elves but sometimes may choose a Half-Elf, Human, Dwarf, or Halfling. Legolas may dare to try controversial classes (i.e. dragonborn, half-orc), but only when their parents aren't playing.

Mirion: Barbarian. Values Strength.

Turhir: Paladin. Values Constitution.

Arvellas: Wizard. Values Wisdom.

Gelir: Ranger. Values Dexterity.

Legolas: Druid. Values Wisdom.

Thranduil: Rogue. Values Dexterity.

Maereth: Bard. Values Charisma.

How They Would Play

The family likes to run the campaign as a group that quests together, rather than individuals, so they work together as a team.

Arvellas is the Dungeon Master mostly because he wrote the guide books and has by far the most organized brain among the brothers. He's also the calmest, most patient, and can keep his brothers in line in case things descend into chaos.

Legolas was the ringleader who initiated the idea to start/play this game in the first place. He begged and helped Arvellas to create the game books, with Arvellas wrangling Legolas's wild enthusiasm and all-over-the-place ideas into brilliant manuals. Legolas also crafted the dice, miniatures, and game boards himself, and he always has the most elaborately detailed character sheets.

Mirion is not much for this sort of game but is absolutely happy to humor Legolas and spend time with his family. Barely knows what is going on and essentially just follows what Legolas tells him he "has" to do. His character is often first to get injured or in trouble, but he laughs it off. Is eating an unholy amount of snacks the entire time.

Turhir is the tactical genius who thinks of creative ways to solve problems and defeat opponents. Mostly does his thing to keep the quest going and everyone alive, but also gives advice regarding combat tactics when asked. Is quietly the MVP of the campaign.

Gelir is just really annoyed by the concept of dice controlling his fate and blames lousy dice rolls a lot. Protests and argues against the "logic" of difficulty checks. Heckles any of his brothers who "mess up" (in his opinion). Chooses courses of action based on what's flashiest instead of what's wise. (He's much more strategic in real life, but this is a GAME. Plus he likes to mess with Legolas.)

Thranduil picks up on the game super quickly despite having the least experience. Frequently leaves the table to attend to crown business (or grab more wine). Assigns Turhir to play for him in his absence because they have the same mindset. Drinks a crazy amount of wine during the course of the game (it helps him relax) but still does not appear drunk, nor is his gameplay affected.

Maereth never gets into trouble (in the game) because literally everyone is half-focused on protecting her. Eventually she gently removes herself from the game so they can play for real without having to consider her. Helped Legolas make the dice, miniatures, and game boards.

I hope you (and all D&D/BG3 readers) enjoyed this as much as I enjoyed writing it! Thank you for this very fun Ask! <3

For more SotWK AU headcanons: SotWK HC Masterlist

Elves HC Tag List: @a-world-of-whimsy-5 @achromaticerebus @acornsandoaktrees @aduialel @asianbutnotjapanese @auttumnsayshi @blueberryrock @conversacomsmaug @elan-ho-detto-elan-15 @entishramblings @glassgulls @heilith @heranintomyknife23times @ladyweaslette @laneynoir @lathalea @quickslvxrr @spacecluster @stormchaser819 @talkdifferently6 @tamryniel @tamurilofrivendell @from-the-coffee-shop-in-edoras

Special Moots who are BG3 fans and might be interested tag: @ass-deep-in-demons @kylobith @tolkien-fantasy @creativity-of-death @missiemoosie (I probably missed some.)

Other useful links:

Introduction to SotWK

Fanfiction Masterlist

Fanfiction Request Guidelines

[dwtdog]

THE OFFICIAL CQFNCE 2024 FIC RANKING

inspired by everyone else doing it :3

i love you (it's ruining my life)- (dnf situationship jealousy fic) this fic made me crazy and ate my brain alive until I could finish it. I'm proud of the banter and the atmosphere of it and the actual smut bc it was way out of my comfort zone at the time but I am so glad I pushed through

(I smile because I want to) I am your boy- (my first dogboy dream fic that's pure fluffiness) this fic was just so FUN to write like yes dream is a dog who likes to be called good boy. exactly. also proud of the dnf of it all in this fic idk just an instant classic to me

pretty?- (bitching fic ^_^) WAYAYYYY outside of my comfort zone but I wrote this all in like 3? hours and it was so fun and I have never felt more insane. chasing that high every day

only a kiss- (dogboy dream smut) sm fun for the same reasons I like writing dog hybrid dream but this is like exploring it through sex so? doubly fun and a little scary as always but I just think I did a good job with the movement of this fic

reach out and take- (omegaverse royalty au) this fic was not supposed to be more than like 2k words but then it was just fun to write because god do I love an identity reveal. there are some thing I wish I could have done better but overall I feel like its just a fun story that works well with the tropes I was using :3

before a fire- (omegaverse heat and rut) I'm going to say this so many times but god this one was just fun to write 😭 shameless crazy omegaverse sex but also I think I got the dnf dynamic down pretty damn good for what it is

we're not alone- (George is a ghost and dream is there) my first time really trying to write angst XD don't love the ending but I am in love with the premise and a few parts have my entire heart

only really me when I'm here with you- (George and dream r both having bad days but find solace in each other) probably recency bias here lol but idk just a classic dnf being soft and loving each other a whole lot fic. never can have too many of those and they r always a blast to write

my love- (George finally agrees to be dream's valentine) I kind of have bad memories of this fic bc I wrote it for someone who I don't talk to anymore but I am proud of the dialogue in this fic, it's one of the first that I wrote and really felt good about :3 so it'll always be at least a little special to me

and I got this one boy (and he won't stop calling)- (dream popstar George soccer player au) this fic is just silly lol I don't remember what made me want to write it?? oh nvm it was for a dnf week lol idk a fun au but I don't think its very memorable

I was made for loving you- (all my fics from femdnf week) this one is hard to rank bc it's a few fics in one but I'm mostly happy with them and think they're fun reads, nothing super memorable and I wish I would have put more time into it but bygones r bygones I guess

stay the night- (milo shits the bed) I MISS WRITING FICS LIKE THISSS wrote this one bc of dream talking about milo shitting on his bed and it was so fun in the moment bc it was building off of everyone posting about it :3 I don't think this fic is that great though lol but I liked writing it and it was a fun time :3

as mine- (fem dnf omegaverse smut) this one is just such an au that it doesn't rlly feel like dnf anymore 😭 it was fun to write but I could have done better

howl together- (werewolf college au) UGH this fic pisses me off bc I feel like I could have written it so much better bc I still love the concept but I just could not figure out how to pull it off well :(

cuckoo's nest- (prince and the pauper dnf retelling) this fic just makes me mad bc I still need to finish it and the fun part is in the second chapter XD I swear. she will see the light of day

at the end of the world- (rivalsduo apocalypse au kind of) another fic that I just feel like I could have done so much better :( I don't like the ending or the middle but I love the start and the concept but I just did not do it right UGH

need- (dnf esex) my first explicit fic but it's just so overwhelmingly meh that I can only look at it with mild revulsion like what was I doing I don't know 😭 but I rlly did give it my best shot. i guess

every night has it's day (so magical)- (dog boy dream and they get tattoos for some reason?) idk. weakest dogboy dream fic by farrr it's just kind of a mess and I wish it wasn't :( there are some parts I really like but it just feels aimless now when I look back at it

I see the player you mean- (manhunt timeloop fic) I really wish one of my longest fics didn't end up at the bottom but whateverrrr I still really like this concept but I am not happy with how this fic came out

I like this player / it played well / it did not give up- (idek what happens in this one) the most aggressively meh fic I have ever written I don't think anything actually happens in it ??

false pretenses- (karlnapity bodyguard assassin CEO fic) HONORABLE MENTION since it's technically ongoing I just need like one day to be really crazy and finish it. and I will. i swear to god I hate leaving things unfinished

[orchidyoonkook]

I adore your stories. I literally keep going back to them, they're that good! You're easily one of my favorite fic writers on Tumblr.

I was wondering if I could ask for some writing advice?

I used to write fics, and I have a ton of ideas that I'm wanting to write out. I'm even wanting to pick up and re-write an old fic. My issue is I have no clue where to start again.

How do you get motivated to write?

And do you ever look at your work and feel blah about it, like it doesn't seem to be good to you?

I am so happy this ask caught me on a catch up day. I've literally spent all day catching up on missed asks I can asnwer and reviews and messages. It's honestly like a little reward and for that I wanna say such a big thank you.

Onto!:

(note from future yoon: omg this is so long im so sorry)

I adore your stories. I literally keep going back to them, they're that good! You're easily one of my favorite fic writers on Tumblr.

Well I guess I'm starting this off in tears?? This is the sweetest thing literally ever and I cannot thank you enough for giving my stories a chance. I'm sure you know as a writer yourself but this is the most any writer could ask for in terms of feedback and I literally just wanna hug you.

Thank you so much for reading.

And the fact that I'm one of literally anyone's favourite fic writers is actually insane. Take that highschool english teacher! But in all seriousness I will actually cry this is so kind thank you thank you thank you. 😭😭😭♥♥♥♥♥

I was wondering if I could ask for some writing advice?

Absolutely, always. But idk how good it'll be XD

I used to write fics, and I have a ton of ideas that I'm wanting to write out. I'm even wanting to pick up and re-write an old fic. My issue is I have no clue where to start again.

literal story of my life my god how i relate to this.

How do you get motivated to write?

I don't. That's the thing. When I'm motivated it's like a fluke. (jsyk this is gunna be long because I cant shut up)

TWWWBAATTA was a complete and total fluke. I'd had a dream, it was the first act of the story. I loved the idea so much that when I woke up I wrote the spark notes of it in my notes app. And then I sat on it for two weeks. I hadn't written anything in maybe 4 years, let alone fic, let alone a BTS fic. I'd only ever written one thing prior that wasn't for my education so I had no idea what the hell I was going to do.

The idea kept pounding at the door of my brain, begging to be let in and explore every freaking nook and crany it could. So i let it. and after two weeks, I had a very VERY rough plot. I kept the ideas in either my notes app or a google doc, and i just let them flow. Anything and everything. And soon enough TWWWBAATTA was born.

UTWT came from a writing prompts list. I saw a prompt for "First kiss" and then thought "wouldn't it be cool if it was under a willow tree like the one in my hometown?" and literally 2 days later UTWT was written. -> Rainfall Brings Tomorrow came from an ask, it hit me out of freaking nowhere. I just wanted something short and sweet and ask fulfilling and RBT worked perfectly for that.

TDWV was the first thing I actively sat down and told myself to write. Halloween is my favourite holiday, and I wanted to do something for it last year. I'd had the title written down in my idea's note, and built it up from there. I went to pinterest, I looked at old and new "story ideas" on there and on tumblr lists. I essentially just pick and chose pieces of prompts and stuff from my own ideas and built it up from there. I had a general goal: spooky, yoongi, first attempt at writing smut -> because I always put a challenge in the stories for myself, whether that be writing something I never have or exploring a new topic or following specific tropes <- and then I chose a setting. And literally just built up the story as I went.

Most recently with PG, I'd been in such a writing rut, still am. But I wanted to write SOMETHING. and PG -> Pretty Girl was another thing I'd had in my ideas note. So I took that and then decided in order to just write, I'd write something easy and took a lot of my favourite tropes and decided to write off those. In this case it was older brothers best friend, age gap, forbidden love, yearning, possessive male lead, overprotective older brother and head strong female lead. And went wild with it. I didn't know the member I was writing at first, but then when I went to go write the vibe of the male lead, I realised it was Tae.

Once I have a general idea of the overall story I can usually just channel the rest. As in I can just write the story as it plays out. But sometimes it doesnt work like that and I get stuck, like with a Joon fic I've half started. I have the overall vibe, and I can feel what I want to happen, but I'm missing some key points or I can't see them yet so it's still vibing in my drafts.

So you can see I don't really get motivation so more of a it finds me and then I work on it. Sometimes I have to just make it from thin air. The thing that helps me most tho is I have to remember that I enjoy writing. I like doing it. I like telling stories even if no one else will like them. I like experiencing them with the characters, as the characters, as the settings and their props, i enjoy character creation and giving them their quirks and hobbies and backstories. It's not a chore to write their stories, it's a priviledge they chose me to tell it.

It's so hard to explain, but if you're having a tough time with the stories you're wanting to tell, it probably means they need just a touch more shelf time, or at least so is the case for me.

My advice would be to weave a fic into something you love. My female characters are often in the arts because I love art and creating it. I wove PG from tropes I'm a sucker for. I wove UTWT from a single idea and a tree from my hometown I've always adored. Little itty bitty things like this can drive story ideas and motivation because you can always go back and realise why you were writing it in the first place.

One of the most important things for me is to remember that somebody else has already done your idea. But you haven't. It's never been done your way. And idk about you, but I can absolutely say I've never said "Oh no! not ANOTHER forbidden romance fic! there's just too many of them" because there's not. I will happily read the same exact fic with slight variations a hundred times over. And so will other people, so don't worry about it being like others.

Motivation is something people think they need in order to to the big overall arcing task. But you dont. All you have to do is set aside an hour or three (I use 9pm-midnight) for the thing you want to do. If i write or plot or idea come up with for three hours a night, seven days a week, thats 21 hours of writing time. I could get out 2 sentences or 20k words in that time. But all that matters is that I did SOMETHING.

You don't have to do it all in one go. You don't even have to do it over the course of a set period of time. I started TWWWBAATTA in August of 2022 and I only have 8(?) chapters out. I work on it when I can, but I don't push it because writing is meant to be a hobby I enjoy.

As for where to start. Start somewhere new or somewhere familiar. Pick an idea or a previously written scene and write it or update it to match your current writing style. I cannot begin to tell you the amount of times I've picked up and put down a chapter of TWWWBAATTA because it wasn't what I wanted or I hated the direction it was going. But I always came back and either added or edited, and sooner or later an idea would strike or I'd figure it out through the repitition. Having multiple stories to bounce between has also helped me when I'm stuck. I try to keep three on hand, but two works just as well. Just to get a variation. Like I had PG going at the same time as the previously mentioned Joon fic another Yoongi fic on the go. All differernt genres, all wildly different plots and directions, and just being able to go between the three when one wasn't working to give my brain a breather helped a lot.

is that sufficient? I feel like I've just been ranting about my process versus answering the question, but it's through my process that I answer the question, does that make sense? If not, feel free to ask again or more specifically in exactly what you'd like to know, I'm literally always happy to talk anyones ear off.

And do you ever look at your work and feel blah about it, like it doesn't seem to be good to you?

A L W A Y S. alwayssss. All of the goddamn time. But I see it as a good thing because that means I'm improving.

Writing is one of those things that you will never reach the top skill level off because it doesn't exist. You can always get better, be better, write more, write better, write differently. It's a constantly evolving internal staircase that you will never reach the top of. Which is both extremely relieving because that means you can always improve, and yet incredibly frustrating because you will constantly be looking back on previous works like "what the hell was I thinking' because your style has evolved with the progress you've made.

I used to be so goddamn proud of the first chapter of TWWWBAATTA. I loved it. I thought it was the perfect opening chapter to this huge story in my head. It set up everything, I was just really pleased with it and excited to post it. But I reread it a while ago and my literal thoughts were "This, THIS, is what I was so proud of?? It needs literally so much work oh my god"

And then I remember that I wrote that two years ago, I have two years more of experience than I did before I wrote it. So of course it's not going to be as good as I could do now. But it was as good as I could do then. And that's okay. I'm still proud of 2 years ago me, and I'm happy she was really pleased with her work. She was excited and eager and happy to write. That's the feeling I try to chase with writing, not how good the writing is, but the feeling I get when I do it.

okay rant over, thank you for sending this ask in it was so much fun to talk shop!! I barely do it nowadays with new folks and all my friends are probably sick to death of me talking process XD.

I hope your writing goals are met and your ideas flow. But even if they dont, try writing something completely different. Try to describe a colour without using it's name, or a season without using it's key descriptive points. My favourite is taking cliche lines and reworking them into something different and more creative (ex: "My heart was racing" into something like "My heart threatened to break free from it's prison with nothing more than it's quick thundering beats" you get the gist). Or set a goal for yourself. Write four sentences everyday. They could all be one word. They could all be filled with commas and semi colons and take up half the page when your done.

My point, I guess, is to just write. Whether it's good or bad, doesnt matter, you can always fix it later. Editing is the easy part, you just gotta get the ideas down first, and then refine from there.

[uhhhhmanda]

hi hi! how are you? hope things are great on your end

you're one of my fave tdj authors out here. i have many faves—many as in i think every tdj authors are my faves lol. but i have one or several Qsfor you!

when did you start writing fics?

and what's the writing style difference between the present you and younger you?

i love that you write characters interaction so seamlessly. it's like irl interaction the way you type out those words, just.. how?

also.. i do know you enjoy drawing as well. wdyt is the difference and similarities with writing and drawing? aside from the obvious xD

thanks!💖

hello hello!!! Things are good on my end! I have today to myself so I am catching up on dramas and keeping an eye on the sky because we are under a wind watch and I love it when the weather is extra.

Setting aside the muppet-arming I'm doing at the idea that anyone likes my fics even a little bit, I too, feel like every TDJ writer is my favorite TDJ writer! Everyone's doing something different with the same Legos! It's fascinating!

I started writing fics before I even knew what fanfiction was -- when I was in probably the 5th or 6th grade. I was writing what I called "lost episodes" of (brace yourself) The A-Team (lol) on my Tandy computer (this was like 1990). I kept writing fics as I cycled through fandoms, but most of what I wrote in middle and high school was horny Sherlock Holmes self-insert stuff (on paper -- which I eventually burned thank goodness). I wrote A LOT of rpf smut for a band I was obsessed with in the early 00s, then got bit by the stucky bug and pounded out 412,392 words in that fandom that never saw the light of day. I was bullied (affectionately) by twitter/ao3 user meokchau into posting LBFAD fics, which was my first time sharing on AO3!

I've been writing (fic or fiction) since I got the bug from my 1st grade teacher (petition to canonize Mrs VanBrocklin, she was AMAZING) and over the course of those decades I have been shedding unnecessary stuff. I used to go into Melville-esque descriptions of every follicle of every character and every molecule contained in every room they entered. Now, I rely on shorthand -- if the setting is not an important one I can sum it up as "spacious and well-appointed." This has a different meaning depending on the genre that the reader and I have agreed upon: a spacious and well-appointed great hall in a fantasy setting might make the reader envision high stone walls and detailed tapestries. A spacious and well-appointed board room in a modern setting might have leather desk chairs and a large flat screen for presentations. This is even easier in fic because so many people, places, objects, and outfits, are already implanted in the reader's mental library. I don't have to labor over describing the sheen of anodized Vibranium, I can just say "Steve's shield" and we all have a crystal clear image. (In the TDJ fandom we all have a damn-near visceral reaction to the words "silver cross necklace" LOL.)

I also hope very much that my writing has become less heavy-handed. I tried self-publishing a few years ago and you know how your writing seems completely different when you print it out than when you're reading it on a screen? Well, when you've got an actual book in your hand you can see a whole other level of editing that you missed. It was preeeeetty humbling. (I pulled the book, btw.)

I wish I knew where my ability to write character interactions came from so that I could use it irl! I am awkward af in person!!!! But when I'm writing, the conversations and gestures just fly out of my brain fully-formed. It's fun and effortless! How can I activate these braincells at dinner parties???

The biggest difference for me between writing and drawing is that my brain thinks in words. I am pretty much always writing because I have a kind of inner narrator running all the time. But I have to turn on the art part of my brain. I think it's because the writing all happens in the thinkmeat but to art I have to connect the eyeballs -- and then, since I can only practice when I'm physically doing it as opposed to just thinking about it I don't get anywhere near as much practice, so drawing is a much greater challenge for me than writing even though I've been obsessed with both hobbies since childhood.

Thank you SO MUCH for your interesting questions! I have been hemming and hawing for a few days over sending an ask to a fan artist and I think this has inspired me to do it! If someone is interested in how lil ol me makes my stuff then I can ask this cool artist what makes them tick!

[qoldenskies]

I’ve been reading through canary continuity for the first time and aauagAAGHGHGA it’s so good. Your characterization is so MMMM chef’s kiss, and your writing style is the kind I just find sooo delectable. many many kudos to you

I’m not sure if you’ve talked about this already in some post buried deep in your blog, but I’m curious where you got for the idea for CC? It’s so devilishly angsty, involving psychological fuckery for *all* them; I wanna know what happened in that sick brain of yours to come up with it 👁️👁️

(no actual pressure to share, of course 🤍 wishing you the best)

hi, thank you!!! xD and im ngl when it comes to how i came up with the concept for CC .... i actually doooont remember the specifics very well. i started it right after i finished coming undone (which was kind of my breakout in the fandom, i genuinely recommend it if you've read CC and havent touched it because its open and shut with the hurt/comfort!!) and really i just wanted to write something a lot heavier. i know that originally i had something SIMILAR to the concept always planned up, actually in a very early concept of the story i thought it was just going to be the attack at the end and then i sat there and was like... i could make it psychological horror with how shit donnie's emotional intelligence is. i could do that. and then i DID!!! if you look deep enough you can probably find that post in august i made that was legit "i just got a TERRIBLE idea for a long oneshot" LMFAOOOO

actually a majority of the first two scenes were scripted really close after my second rewatch of the show in may with my brother, before i actually ever wrote any fic for the fandom, so theyre a little special like that!!! but otherwise genuinely i CANNOT for the liifeee of me remember where i got the canary thing from. i just thought it was a cool metaphor to do with donnie for several reasons and things. uh. escalated

[alpaca-clouds]

On Balduran: Tentacles might've been an improvement

I wrote about this again, but I will be saying it once more: I am sorry folks, but I am still of the opinion that the Emperor is not worse than Balduran from all that we know about Balduran. Morally speaking that is. Because Balduran, well... He is a colonizer. I am sorry, he is a fucking colonizer. He is Hernan Cortez and Christorpher Columbus rolled into one.

And really, in comparison he is almost tame as the Emperor. I mean, sure, the Emperor does manipulate the player character in BG3. Sure. It is not a nice squid. It will not even consider allowing Orpheus to live. But that's like... literally the worst it does. Manipulate, gaslight, and yeah, kill Orpheus. Duh. But it does not even consider taking over control of the Netherbrain to become the Absolute. It does not use this for any other advantages. And while it tries to manipulate you into becoming illithid, but... that's it. Sure, it will express its disappointment when you do not do the illithid thing, but it is not as if it will force you to become illithid. So all in all, it is actually quite a nice squid - as far as the brain eating squids go xD

But Balduran? Well, he was an "adventurer", and sure, he did some heroics in his life. But also... He is who "discovered" Anchorome, the Toril-equivalent of America. The first time around when he went to Anchorome he plundered, and murdered his way a bit into the continent, and brought quite a lot of treasure home. Which is part of the reason why Baldur's Gate as a city is so rich. He went home, but after a while he wanted to go to Anchorome once more. That was where he disappeared from "history".

What happened was, that he arrived there, let the first indigenous people live, then attacked some others. His people got sick, a lot died, he "conscripted" indigenous folks, threw a shaman overboard, got cursed. And just all in all... I am very sorry, Balduran just does not sound as if he had been a nice guy.

So yeah, I am sorry. Just from the little bit that we know about Balduran (which is not a lot because most of this info comes from the old BG games, where it is explored in DLC and side missions) I honestly gotta say: I think the Emperor is a nicer person in comparison. He is not a nice person. But... Nicer than Balduran.

[puhpandas]

About the whole SB 2 thing, I remember I had a dream on the morning of Halloween where we kind got a dlc... For the ruin dlc?? Idk my dreams are weird.

Anyway, we were playing as Gregory who went down into the Plex to save Cassie, and we had Helpi along with us telling what to do. Gregory was also talking on the radio trying to reach Cassie. That dream never finished so idk what happened next.

But I can tell you that whenever I think of that dream, it makes me feel chills go down my spine. The good chills. The dream was so good that for a moment I thought it was real XD.

fr I've had so many dreams where I wake up and am like damn my brain was cooking. my dream wrote an actual good story I was watching a movie while I was asleep