#there are basically no premises susie can dependably say 'no' to

[susiecarter]

I know you wrote alot of different superbat tropes and I'm not sure if you're taking suggestions but I don't think you've covered a jealousy trope. I'd love to see Clark helplessly jealous of Bruce and all his beautiful men/ women he dates and Bruce genuinely being none the wiser of thinking maybe Clark is avoiding him all of a sudden is because he's come to his senses and realised that Bruce's friendship is a waste of time or the reason for Clark being rude ( or as rude as someone like Clark can be ) to some of his dates is because he's annoyed with brucie Wayne and his airheadedness / fakeness . And then Clark just loses it when confronted and confesses how he feels and then they have life changing sex lmao !

:D Hi, anon! You're not wrong, haha, I am ALL ABOUT the tropes—and while I have to admit that part of the reason I've never written a fic focused on jealousy is because jealousy doesn't usually tickle my id particularly well (especially with these guys, because I enjoy their delicious angst the most when they're feeling insecure and unsure of themselves emotionally = they're usually holding themselves back/deliberately trying not to put themselves forward as an option :'D) ...

... I have to admit that the way you are framing this prompt is working for me VERY MUCH INDEED. *______*! Your parenthetical is totally correct, Clark being genuinely rude to an innocent third party is kind of a hard sell :D and basically all of the rest of this, I love—the more I think about it, the more I can buy Clark feeling Some Kind of Way about all the gorgeous models (dudes, ladies, neither, Bruce Wayne is ~flexible) Bruce has on his arm all the time, one second wishing that that were him and the next second telling himself not to be so stupid (and it's not precisely that he'd LIKE having lots of people staring at him, flashes going off in his face, all of that—but it wouldn't be about Superman, it would be because he was with Bruce, because he was Bruce's and everyone was seeing him be Bruce's, and he'd have Bruce's attention, too, the headiest part of all—) ... and also feeling a certain uncharitable degree of, like, frustration, because none of these people actually know Bruce, and so it's annoying to watch them be dismissive or patronizing toward ~Bruce Wayne~; he wouldn't be like that, he respects Bruce, he cares about who Bruce actually is, he'd be grateful if Bruce gave him the time of day and he'd do whatever he could to be worthy of it ... and also being afraid he couldn't get Bruce, or if he got him, couldn't keep him, when he'd have to compete with people who look like that, people who can swan their way through upscale parties just as smoothly as Bruce can, people who are glamorous and confident and important. ;-;

And OF COURSE he'd tie himself into a huge ugly knot about it, of course he'd get himself worked up in his head over it until he can't stand to watch Bruce smile and ~bedroom eyes~ at and kiss EVEN ONE MORE OF THESE GD RANDOS, and OF COURSE Bruce would take that carefully imposed distance at least ten wrong ways at once and decide he must be the problem. :'D I will never get tired of writing Clark snapping in the face of Bruce's unwillingness to believe Clark genuinely wants him and articulating his actual feelings as forcefully as he can figure out how to, AND *clenches fists* YES, LIFE-CHANGING SEX INDEED. :DDDDD

So, yeah, as always, I can make you no promises, but if I do actually manage to write this idea, I will 100% give all credit to this ask (and/or to you directly, if you want to send me a follow-up with a username I can attribute! IF NOT NO WORRIES ♥ and seriously, thank you so much for the ask and the prompt!)

[smokeybrand]

Smokey brand Movie Reviews: You Should See Me in a Crown

I’m not a massive fan of the classic Sherlock Holmes tales. I’ve read them all and appreciate the legacy and what they’ve inspired in other works, but they’ve never been my favorite tales. I actually enjoy the various interpretations and re-imaginings much more than the core mythos. I like RDJ’s take in film and the more modern spin with Elementary but, by far, my favorite rendition of Sherlock was the BBC version that made Benadryl Cumquatt a star. That show is inspired, at least the first two seasons, and it blessed me with one of the greatest television villains i have ever had the pleasure of witnessing; Andrew Scott’s Moriarty. My goodness, is he the greatest adaption of that villain! He even looks the part. I say all of this because Enola Holmes dropped today on Netflix. It’s a completely different take on the Holmes mythos centering on Sherlock’s younger sister, Enola and starring Millie Bobby Brown of Stranger Things fame. This is her vehicle, i think she’s producing it, so I'm curious how well it’ll fare. These Stranger kids are all growing up and trying to transition into adult stardom. Finn Wolfhard is doing fine and Millie seems to be taking things into her own hands. Let’s see in those hands are steady enough to push her into the next phase of her career.

The Good

I’m not one for that old timey Victorian aesthetic but i can appreciate the effort it must take to give it life in the modern age. The costumes and sets in this thing are exquisite. This is gorgeous and meticulously crafted film.

This film’s direction is pretty okay. The narrative, itself, leaves a lot to be desired but what is presented, has been deftly constructed. Credit to Harry Bradbeer for that. Dude has directed a few episodes of both Fleabag and Killing Eve so he’s got the chops. I just wish the fare this time was a little more substantial so he could really sink his chops into it.

This cast is loaded. There are several names in supporting roles worth note. Adeel Akhtar, Fiona Shaw, Frances de la Tour, and Susie Wokama all make memorable appearances. Louis Partridge is a little flaccid in the love interest role but he does enough to distract.

Millie Bobby Brown makes this movie. Her Enola Holmes is brilliant, witty, and full of that ardent, rebellious, energy all teenage girls are filled with. Though er story is one of mystery and intrigue, it is, first and foremost, kind of a coming-of-age tale. Brown does a decent job carrying this film and never falters in the same space as older, seasoned, actors like Helena Bonham Carter and Fiona Shaw.

Henry Cavill is basically playing Superman. His Sherlock Holmes is easily the weakest I've ever seen. Dude simply doesn’t have the chops to pull this off. I might be judging him too harshly considering the caliber of actor to have filled this role and made it their own in recent times. These are big shoes to fill but they fit ill on Cavill. This ain’t his story so we don’t really get to see that brilliant deduction but i don’t know that he could have pulled it off even if we did.

Helena Bonham Carter as the Holmes matriarch, Eudoria, is a pleasure. She steals every scene she’s in, even if there aren’t many. The Mrs. Holmes is mostly absent but the specter of her charisma permeates every facet of this film and it’s very welcomed. I just wish there was more of her.

Sam Caflin’s Mycroft Holmes is a very interesting take on the character. Dude is effectively the villain of this narrative. He’s out to force Enola into doing everything she doesn’t want. Dude is the overbearing pops or whatever. It’s awkward seeing Mycroft this way but he is ably portrayed by Caflin so i don’t have too big an issue with him.

The Bad

This thing exudes female energy. It is every bit Enola’s story. Now, I'm not too mad at that. Millie is decent in the role and it is unmistakably her film but that is, in this current climate, very abrasive to some. There is a strong feminist slant in how this narrative is presented and that might turn a lot of people off, depending on if they feel that is “controversial” or not.

There is just SO much exposition in this thing. It’s the nature of the genre, cats have to talk there way through problems or whatever but I've seen this part of these types of stories done much better. Sherlock, for example, found a way to visualize this and did it very well in the first two seasons. This film does not do that. It’s not super terrible but it did take me out of the story a little bit.

The music in this is very distracting. There aren’t many scene where the narrative just let’s you breathes. There’s always a whimsical swell or a punctuation flare to emphasize a shot. This feels like a callow tactic to give more levity and agency to the film where there really isn’t any to be had.

The writing in this is kind of weak. I thought, with how everything was progressing, that it might have been written by several people bu it wasn’t. One person crafted this tale; Jack Thorne. I’m really familiar with the bulk of his work but, if it’ anything like this, i imagine his is an underwhelming catalog.

This thing doesn’t feel like a movie. It feels like a series or that it should have been a series. I don’t see how this thing could have succeeded in the theater and it should count it’s blessings it found a home on Netflix because this definitely would have flopped. This thing feels like a proper Netflix movie, not a Hollywood outing.

As if to dive my previous point home, this is definitely sequel fodder. This film was made with several to follow in mind. Enola Holmes is a whole ass book series so there is definitely material to be had there. There’s six book so content isn’t lacking but i kind of feel like that ending should have felt a little more finite. This cash grab attempt at film universes and sequel bait is the most disingenuous sh*t ever outside of microtransactions in games and i kind of hate it. It’s wild to see everyone release sub-par entries on the hope they can patch the sh*t with sequels but everyone forgets that Iron Man was exceptional. It’s easily the third best MCU film and was the first to release. That first film has to be solid enough to bare the weight of a entire franchise and Enola Holmes ain’t doing that level of heavy lifting.

This film wears it’s Young Adult categorization like a badge of honor. You can tell this film is just a step and a half up from the likes of Riverdale or Nancy Drew. As a grown as man, this was not for me and i understand that very well. That said, it falls into that same, tropey, nothingness that the worst of the YA genre is known for, which is all the more reason this should have been a serial not a film. It’s not aggressive in it’s cliche but, if you’ve seen as many films as i have, you pick up on it immediately. For me, that’s the biggest issue with the film but for others. it might not even be worth mentioning.

The Verdict

Enola Holmes is a very cute, but flawed, viewing experience. It’s an interesting take on the Sherlock formula, injected with all of the GRRRL power you’d expect from a film starring a teenage woman in the lead. It’s not pretentious or forceful about it’s messaging but you definitely understand that there is a message it wants to convey. Millie Bobby Brown is excellent as Enola, easily the second best thing about this movie after the scenery chewing Bonham Carter, and there are some strong supporting performances. Cavill is a miss as Sherlock and Mycroft might as well be a mustache twirling villain but, in service to this particular narrative, the change in character makes sense. The film, itself, is ably directed and it’s a legitimately gorgeous watch but there are severe shortcomings. The writing is pedestrian, the plot is cliche, and to cover up these weaknesses, the music is leaned on too heavily. The foremost mystery isn’t one of true merit, i figured it out about halfway through, and it eschews the real conundrum for later time. The whole premise of this movie delivers a relatively intriguing situation but that is left for a later film to resolve and i kind of hate it. Sh*t was mad bogus. None of these issues are very pressing but they are noticeable and, at times, a little grating. Still, i was never bored and it is a rather well put together film, overall, even if it does feel like it should have been a proper miniseries. Enola Holmes is worth a watch but, understand, mileage may vary. I thought there was potential going forward but this thing should have definitely been a series and not a film.