#then you are fucking stupid because uhmmm you ever used the word queer?

[cowboy-robooty]

imma be so fr rn i think its homophobic when people are fine with yuri but go up in arms about yaoi. like seriously. because its so fucking stupid to act as though yuri is somehow less fetishistic than yaoi when legit the entire fetish appeal of lesbianism in yuri is the fact that its "so pure and untainted by men". Straight men who consume yuri love it because they have a thing for purity in a similar vein as straight women love yaoi for being guys "sinning" and shit. I think both of these sentiments are foul in their own respective ways and its plain ignorant to act as though the "purity" of yuri is made out of a respect for lesbians instead of fetishistic appeal. And dont get it twisted rn and think im saying yaoi and yuri both suck; you know i love both of these genres, but i can criticize it without saying the genre as a whole is some evil demon shit. Straight erotica also houses a plethora of problematic themes and sentiments because every genre is going to have issues, especially when its lewd content. Lewd content is made TO BE fetishistic because well... its lewd; the problems that arise are not black or white matters and I think that if people are willing to enjoy straight erotic manga critically but unwilling to give the same grace to yaoi or yuri then thats plain homophobic. Because when people act as though yaoi and yuri having these problems means that the genres as a whole are unsalvagable while straight erotica can still be excused, it implies that homosexuals are obligated to be BETTER than heterosexual content to be accepted. It creates this idea that homosexual content is somehow inherently more dirty and needs to make up for this fact by being morally superior in other ways. 50 shades of gray and twilight can exist with a littany of foul tropes and problematic themes that are completely put into a fetishistic light, and yes it recieves mockery and is called cringe (because it is), but how come thats all it gets while some yaoi has the same shit going on and is treated like the entire genre as a whole needs to be exterminated??????? nobody has ever said that all shitty novels made for lonely women need to be demolished because of twilight and 50 shades of gray, and anyone who has gets called out for their misogyny because its fucking stupid to act like an entire genre of content should be killed for some cringe loser shit being mixed in with it. All porn has problematic tropes, and its so homophobic to act like specifically the genre of gay men having sex is the most egregious offender of these tropes while passing off yuri as fine because the problematic tropes it houses feed into the idea of purity.

Like oh my god, the majority of yuri is not made for lesbians. Even though it is made by women, these women are not fucking queer women. They're straight women who are feeding into the misogynistic ideals of pure, feminine women remaining pure and feminine by keeping untainted by men while exploring eachothers bodies. thats why yaoi and yuris problems mirror eachother in that you see an abundance of heteronormativity in yaoi (big semes, small ukes; with the smaller feminine one being lured into a tainted world of sin by being gay or whatever) while yuri has the opposite problem with a lack of body diversity because it focuses on ideal feminine ladies remaining untouched by "sin" by only touching eachother. Why do you think that around the same time yaoi was full of shit like junjou romantica bullshit yuri was also notorious for being boring as hell with two girls thats have no personalities making out together? Because BOTH of these genres had these issues much more severely in the 2000s-2010s. Yaoi was too crazy with that sinning fetish while Yuri was too boring with that purity fetish. Its also so stupid when people keep using examples from that era of yaoi as evidence that western mlm work is sooooo much better and superior compared to the entire fucking genre because its comparing shit from ten years ago to shit made now. Idk if you remember but literally ten years ago pedo bear was a normal thing that was goddamn EVERYWHERE online. Culture changes and i can assure you western gay media was not so squeaky clean during that time either; but this is a whole 'nother enchilada to be devoured another time.

Anyways in short; its homophobic as hell if you embrace yuri but shun yaoi. All you're doing is showing you have a fundamental lack of understanding concerning the roots of yuri and who yuri is actually made for. You're acting like gay men having sex is inherently "dirtier" than straight people having sex and that they need to compensate by being more morally righteous. I'm not saying that the different problematic tropes found in each type of erotica is good and shouldn't be changed, but its homophobic to excuse straight porn while refusing that same grace to yaoi. And it disgusts me seeing people continue to perpetuate the sentiment of gay men being seen as sin and lesbian women being seen as pure (in an almost baby-fying way) only wrapped up in a new convoluted form of packaging while acting like theyre protecting homosexuals.

[sleepwalkwith-me]

rules: answer these 85 questions and tag 20 people

— What was your last…

1. Drink: Coffee

2. Phone call: a friend called me because she took the bus to my house but she didn’t really know where she had to go

3. Text message: i asked a friend what we would give this other friend for his birthday (surprise, we ended on money. how original amirite?!?!)

4. Song you listened to: mystery of love – sufjan stevens (did i cry listening to this??????? maybe)

5. Time you cried: oh. well. listening to mystery of love haha. i saw call me by your name two days ago and idk why but this song just HITS ME LIKE A TRUCK

__ Have you ever…

6. Dated someone twice: i have never actually dated anyone

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: nah mate no regrats

8. Been cheated on: like i said, have never dated anyone, so no.

9. Lost someone special: yes

10. Been depressed: not really, i haven’t been diagnosed or anything. but sometimes i feel like there’s definitely something up with that brain of mine.

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: Yes. 10/10 would not recommend.

— Fave colours

12. black

13. green

14. yellow

— In the last year have you…

15. Made new friends: yessss. i started a new study in a new city, so i met loads of new people. i’m lucky enough to call some of them very close friends already :)

16. Fallen out of love: Love?????? no. but this year i got over this big crush (iguess? a bit more than just a crush lol) that kinda dominated my life for a year or two.

17. Laughed until you cried: i don’t even remember what it was about but yesterdayme and my friend marijn were in the weirdest mood where everything was funny as heck

18. Found out someone was talking about you: no not really? i mean people probably do but who cares you know

19. Met someone who changed you: i wouldn’t say completely ‘changed’ me, but one of my new friends from university does make me a more WokeTM person so i think that counts as positive change right?

20. Found out who your friends are: not in a bad way, but i graduated high school this year, so now i realise that i don’t speak to a few of my old friends anymore and that they were just friends because i saw them everyday.

21. Kissed someone on your facebook friends list: yeh.

— General

22. How many of your facebook friends do you know irl: All of them.

23. Do you have any pets: Noooo, i used to have cute lil bunnies but i have been pet-less for about 8 years i think :(

24. Do you want to change your name: nah. Sometimes I wish I didn’t have the dutch ‘ij’ in my name bc it’s had for non-dutch people to pronounce, but that also makes it cool i guess

25. What did you do for your last birthday: i had 2 exams on my birthday haha, so that was my main activity. But afterwards I went out for dinner and drinks with my friends which was very nice <3

26. What time did you wake up today: 6:30 and i DID NOT LIKE IT

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: downstairs, in my house, pouring myself a tea before going to bed. i came home from a symposium at 23:30 so i needed a little chill out time before i could go to bed

28. What is something you can’t wait for: lots of things!!! things that are happening in the near future, like going to the efteling (dutch themepark) with my friends in a few weeks, going out tomorrow, spending this weekend at my sisters house in amsterdam, or going to mallorca with mah gurlz this summer. But also i can’t wait for things like falling in love!! meeting people that will be in your life forever!!! moving to Utrecht!!! 

30. What are you listening to right now: my mom and dad talking about books they are reading, and the radio (radio 4, classical music) is playing in the background

31. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: weirdly; no??? at first i was like yeah ofc everyone knows someone named tom but then i couldn’t think of anyone???? weird dude.

32. Something that’s getting on your nerves: my own stupid ass bc there are a million things i should be doing rn but what am i doing????? filling in this tag bc i’m selfobsessed ha ha lol

33. Most visited website: tumblr or netflix i think

34. Hair colour: Blonde

35. Long or short hair: not like Really Long but it’s over my shoulders so idk

36. Do you have a crush on someone: i’m crushing 24/7 honey, whether it’s on a celebrity, or a cute guy from my class, or even someone that has been even the tiniest bit nice to me haha what’s wrong with me??? idk i love people man

37. What do you like about yourself: i’m always trying to see the good in people, which some people don’t really see as a positive thing and they tell me that it’s gonna get me screwed over or something but idk i think it’s a good thing

38. Want any piercings: atm i have 3 earrings in my left ear, 2 in my right, and also a helix piercing in my right ear. and boiiiiii do i want more! i really like earpiercings but idk which one to get next yet

39. Blood type: don’t know actually. is that weird? is that something i should know? oh well

40. Nicknames: depends on who i’m with, but a few are: karlit, karliño, karlinna, kar(rie), carlos, and heyitscarry (that’s my snapchat, everyone makes fun of me for it lol), 

41. Relationship status: single

42. Sign: ~~*aquarius*~~

43. Pronouns: she/her

44. Fave tv show: it’s usually the one i’m watching at the moment, but a few overall favs are brooklyn nine-nine, new girl, american horror story, teen wolf, queer eye (!!!), jane the virgin, shadowhunters (i know it’s shit but MALEC IS THE ONLY THING KEEPING ME ALIVE RN), and oh my i could go on. idk, i just really love shows in general; good or ‘bad’, if they make me happy i’m instantly like ‘yup just found my new fav show!!!’

45. Tattoos: sadly, no

46. Right or left handed: righty

47: Ever had surgery: yeah once when i was little, i think i had something with my ear but i don’t even really know

48. Piercings: like i said, just my ears; 3 normal ones on the left, 2 normal ones + a helix on the right

49. Sport: not anymore whoops but i used to dance and do this weird sport called wheel gymnastics. look it up, it’s fun.

50. Vacation: what about it?? uhmmm upcoming ones are a 3 day trip to berlin with this huge student organisation in may, and a week in mallorca with my friends this summer.

51. Trainers: as in.. shoes? like.. sneakers?? idk, don’t own them. i usually wear converse in summer and my fake dr. martins or my heels in winter i guess haha

— More general

52. Eating: rn? nothing, just had dinner tho

53. Drinking: coffeeeee

54. I’m about to watch: the flash, 3x04 

55. Waiting for: my deadlines and exams to be over so i can do nothing without feeling guilty

56. Want: ???? so many things?????

57. Get married: uhmmmmmmmmmmm not yet 

58. Career: well i don’t have one if that’s what you’re asking. but i’m studying sociology so idk i hope to get a job where i can use my sociology-skills

— Which is better

59. Hugs or kisses: both plz 

60. Lips or eyes: eyes

61. Shorter or taller: shorter

62. Older or younger: ?????

63. Nice arms or stomach: arms fuck me the fuck up

64. Hookup or relationships: depends??? 

65. Troublemaker or hesitant: i think a combination of both would be good

— Have you ever

66. Kissed a stranger: ya

67. Drank hard liquor: ya

68. Turned someone down: ya

69. Sex on first date: i’m a big ol’ virgin waddup

70: Broken someone’s heart: yes, sadly.

71. Had your heart broken: notreally

72. Been arrested: haha no 

73. Cried when someone died: yes

74. Fallen for a friend: yessssssss 

— Do you believe in

75. Yourself: i go from yes! i am that bitch! to hell no who is this and what does she think she’s doing 

76. Miracles: i mean, not in a religious way or anything. but i think it’s a cute way of naming small, nice, alsmost-impossible things that happen 

77. Love at first sight: i think you can definitely FEEL that you are going to click with someone just by looking at them, but love? no.

78. Santa Claus: in the netherlands we have a slightly different holiday that we celebrate (don’t worry, we also have christmas) where there’s also a man that gives you presents and such. i don’t really remember but my mom always tells me that i very quickly didn’t buy the impossible things surrounding this Sinterklaas. i would always ask questions like; but HOW THE FUCK does he get to every child in ONE NIGHT??? (well maybe i didn’t ask it like that but.. you get it)

79. Angels: nah

— Misc

80. Eye colour: blue

81. Best friends name: Kim, vienna, femke, and estelle

82. Favourite movie: i don’t like ‘favourite’ questions bc i cannot choose man. it totally depends on what kind of movie we’re talking about??? like, i love movies like 17again and mean girls and high school musical? but i also loove movies like call me by your name??? and things like harry potter??? WHAT KIND ARE WE TALKING ABOUT

83. Favourite actor: again... favourite?? there are actors that i think are really talented, there are some that i just like as a person, there are some that i like just bc they play this character? the one that came to mind was dylan o’brien, bc i think beside his looks and nice personality he is an amazing actor (stiles! VOIDSTILES! Mitch rapp! Thomas! wauw what a guy)

84. Favourite cartoon: i don’t really watch cartoons i a m so r ry

85. Favourite teacher’s name: Meneer van Leeuwen. He was my philosophy teacher, but he also teaches physics and ANW (algemene natuurwetenschappen, was BESTE OOIT), and he was my mentor (not the right word sorry idk) for this big endproject that you have to do at the end of highschool in the netherlands). he was truly the BESt.

Thank you @foolishly-fond for tagging me! i’m always a slut for filling things in about myself l o l so i enjoyed doing this. 

I don’t really know who i should tag, and 20 people is a LOT so youknow, consider yourself tagged if you feel like doing this :) x