#then the second will be told from sonia’s pov

[iamdarkness]

Taboo

Alfonse x Summoner.NSFW 18+

This one goes to the people who wanted an Alfonse Summer atl. At least we got Freyr.

 Taboo: from Tongan tabu ‘set apart, forbidden’

 Summoner POV

As a person who comes from the “World of Steel” I am be very used to most levels of nakedness in people. I mean, when you do P. E. at school or when you go to the gym or running at the park, or the beach, and watch TV; we are all bombarded by all kinds of nakedness. We are used to looking at other people’s bodies as something normal.

   When I got to Askr I met heroes of all kinds and many of them are just like me in that they find levels of nakedness normal. Take Hawkeye for for example. He is quite a gentleman and in his culture it is quite normal to be half naked.

 Leading the heroes I got used to them and their bodies enough that I view most of them with a more clinical eye, like a doctor would. When they are wounded and I help treat them, I see their bodies just as a doctor would. The same goes when I see them in the beach or the spring. This make them much more comfortable around me. So much so that some of the heroes have tried to play tricks on me and see me crack.

  Like the time the most unlikely pair, consisting of Niles and Henry played a trick on older Ike. They took his clothes when he was in one of the baths, locked his room and hid his clothes in my office (which is attached to Alfonse’s). They told him not to worry “ The Summoner is asleep.” I was definitely not asleep and saw the guy in all of his muscular glory. Did I get flustered? Not really. I mean at first it was like “WTF”, but I was not ogling the guy! He was all freaked out, and I got worried. Besides, I have seen him almost naked before. What is a little more skin? Well it wasn’t little to be fair…it was actually quite a lot…

  I was quietly reading a report on my writing desk, all hunched over, when he came silently in and stood right in front of me. I waited for him to talk. I thought it was Alfonse at first, coming to get my report, so I did not even say anything. I am used to him just coming in and sit to wait for me to finish my work quietly. Then Ike stands just in front of the desk and I look up to see a mop of dark blue hair over his “Ragnell”. I look all the way up to see Ike looking over at the bookcase behind me. He was not yet aware I was awake.

   -Ike? What are you looking for?- I ask calmly looking back to the bookcase behind me to see what he was looking for. I hear a yelp and something heavy falling down. I look around and find him on the floor covering himself with his hands. His eyes were wide opened and he could not talk for a second. He just kept opening and closing his mouth and said “ I can explain.”in a strangled voice. Alfonse chooses that exact moment to come inside and finds me standing up to give Ike my coat so he can cover himself up. What does he see? I am undressing my self in front of Ike and Ike is naked on the floor.

 ...NICE…

   Yes we were able to clear that up. Alfonse even laughed about it and still does sometimes, but that was only the beginning.

   Some time later Dieck comes inside the study Alfonse and I use in the library. Now we all know Dieck always uses the bare minimum on clothes, but this time he is wearing only his pants and boots. As soon as he comes in, he starts taking his pants off (And of course he is not wearing underwear) and looks at Alfonse and say.

   -Oh Your Majesty is here too? Oh don’t worry; I don’t mind.- He now is butt naked and kicking his boots off. I turn to Alfonse with a ‘WTF’ face and I see him tomato red and very angry. He looks at me and…Why…is he angry at me too? What did I do?

   -Dieck… what the hell is going on?- I ask calmly because I feel Alfonse is going to blow a gasket and any loud noise will set it off.

   -I am here for the check up.- He says simply and his smile falters a little, looking sideways at Alfonse. I focus on his face like it is a normal conversation. Doctors and nurses can do this and so can I.

   -What check up?

   -The one you ordered to check our birthmarks and scars, just in case we are killed and there is no other way to identify our bodies.- I turn to Alfonse and I give him a questioning look, but he appears to not have heard anything except the “the one you ordered”. He is looking at us both angrily back and forth.

   -Umm…Well now that you mentioned it… It sounds like a good idea, but I have never given that order. Whoever told you that? -Still focused on the face.

   -One of the soldiers…so it is not true?- He asks now red in the face, which is very weird because this man has no sense of shame when it comes to showing off. Then he goes to cover himself with his hands, but too late Dieck, I already saw it all.

   -Well no, but it is a good idea, right Alfonse?- I say thoughtfully. He seemed to have regained his senses and is now still red, but his face is lowered and he just nods.

   -Oh…I should go then and find that (he whispers some curses under his breath)…I… -He takes his pants and puts them on. I start making a note about the idea to tell Anna.- I am sorry ______.

   - Don’t worry Dieck. No harm done. This has happened before and just so you know I liked the idea, but if we do make it happen, it would be a member of the healing team doing the check up.- He looks skeptically at Alfonse who is pinching the bridge of his nose and has his eyes closed. You know, that face he does when he is about to lose his patience? Well that one.

   -Oh! Thanks for letting me know.

   -I want to know if you can identify the soldier that told you this. Please see me tomorrow after breakfast,at the training ground.- Alfonse tells Dieck and there is a determined look on his face. Dieck looks back at him and with just the same look, agrees to it.

   At the end we did use that idea, but meanwhile I had four other heroes coming in to undress in my presence. One of them being Lady Camilla who agreed to dismember whoever was the culprit of the trick. The other was Libra who looked about to faint when he was informed he had been tricked by someone. King Claude, who laughed about it and congratulated whoever had bested him in his kind of game; and finally Sonia, who paraded around the room, even after I told her it was not necessary for her to undress. The culprit ended up being Xane ,and Marth was not lenient with him. Neither was I. I mean whoever plays a trick like that on Libra?! Yes! He is a guy!

 This keeps happening periodically, specially with new heroes. It is like some kind of hazing ritual.

   At this point I have seen at least one version of all the heroes naked for one reason or another and like I said before, they seemed to be very comfortable around me and my professionalism.

  Yet I, being myself can’t get used to showing much of my own body due to my insecurities. I mean I may exercise and maybe train but I keep myself still kind of covered up almost all the time. It is a uniform after all. I even have to wear that tiara they gave me. I look like royalty XD

  Askr itself has it’s own norms and they are far more conservative when it came to dress codes and overall behavior. I mean Alfonse sometimes sounds like I imagine my great grandpa sounded back in the day. And this is when I realized something. I have never seen Alfonse in any kind of undress and…It kind of bother me. Why? Because he was the only one person I was attracted to in all of Askr. I loved that man’s mind, heart, personality and skill…in everything he did.

 I knew I was in love with Alfonse at this point, but it had taken another Alfonse showing a little chest to understand that I was the the most sexually frustrated of all my life and that looking at his chest was doing things no one else had done in their entire nakedness. Hell not even porn or hentai had given me the high I got from imaging my Alfonse in that outfit. I mean…not that I used to watch porn or hentai. I know what they are, but the time I did watch, it was all meh. I even thought it was funny. I mean, who isn’t curious about that ? I suppose we have all gone at least once and taken a look at it? Right?…right?

   I remember plain as day I stood there stunned into silence, and probably mouth agape the whole time. I must have looked like an idiot or a pervert! My Alfonse was red as a tomato and trying so hard to avoid my gaze. At the end of the day, the only thing I got out of him was a little laugh and a small  “I am so glad, we do not share that costume here in Askr.”

 …..FUCK!

   I find my self starting at his UN-globed hands when he is drinking tea or eating. I try not to, but the white smooth surface of the back of his hands contrast with the rough calloused fingers, so used to gripping sword and shield. They can also play the sweetest of sounds on a violin and I find that so sexy. Those same long white fingers so tempting and beautiful in their strength and skillfulness. Sometimes I stop my self from wondering how they would feel and...<<What them fingers do Alfonse?!! No ! Stop!>>

  It is true I touch him often. Touch is my love language and even though I always make sure to give people that do mind, their personal space, I do know that Alfonse does not mind. Alfonse may not be a huger, but it does not mean he does not enjoy being touched by people he holds close to him or for them to be near him. Also yes, I have helped him with his wounds but, most of the time I am to damn worried to actually take time to enjoy the touch of his skin and to be hones I find that quite a violation of trust, so I do not indulge in it.

   Sometimes he has caught me starting at the brim of his scarf and under-armor for a glimpse of his neck and I feel so embarrassed by it, but the thought of kissing him there is so tempting to me and I long so much to see past that barrier. He always covers himself again when he sees it is revealing more that that fraction of his neck… And Lord above! Is he smiling?

   The curse of all of this is, that yes we have Summer here in Askr, but it is not as hot and you have to travel to the beach to be seriously hot. He has never gone to the beach with us, since I arrived here.  I am not counting the times we do go, because Anna comes up with some scheme to raise money for the order, because we all wear the uniform then. Whenever he goes to the hot spring; he does it by himself, when Sharena and I are doing something else. Even while going to the river he wears long sleeves, because …bugs. I have asked Sharena and she just answered that she had not noticed and why I was interested….Oh you know…scientific purposes Sharena…

  At first I feel so sad and rejected. Fine…I get it. You are not interested in me and do not welcome my intrusive looks…but…he gives me so many mixed signals! Why is he so close at meetings and I can feel his fingers touching mine. He has taken my hands in his many times. When another hero flirts with me he always appears out of nowhere with knitted brows and a disapproving stare. Prince Hrid came to say ‘Hi’ once and to talk to me, and next thing I know Alfonse drops everything to be next to me as well. Hrid even asked me if we were engaged ! I wish Hrid!

 Well I suppose that is what friends do right? Maybe he does not want me falling in love with a hero and leaving Askr while they need me here. But I talked to him already. I am not returning “home” and I am not leaving…because…How can I leave and not see him again? Not that I wanted to return “home” to begin with, and it seemed impossible to fall in love with someone else other than him.

   I have seen heroes flirting with him as well, and he seems unimpressed by any of them. I have heard other heroes telling the rejected ones, “He has eyes only for the Summoner.” …But what had they seen that I don’t? So I go and ask Sharena and she just laughs it up and says to give him time. He is shy and self conscious.

 …So he does like me, but is very shy and very busy and very self conscious and insecure? OK…I can work with that. Like a great elf king said once; “I am patient; I can wait.” But not that much cause I’m not an elf.

   Then Lif came and I thought “Hell! Even his grandpa show more skin than him!”

 Lif came like a shadow from the grave that will take your last breath. To be honest, he looked more like Death than Hel herself. Except… He was HOT. I felt bad for even thinking that, when the Goddess of Death was trying to end us all, and most specially Alfonse. And you see, that is when I got angry. How the heck was an ancestor of the Askr royalty helping that crazy witch, end his descendants?

   Lif attacked us and tried to, I suppose…kidnap me? He made a bee line to where I was standing and fell all the soldiers on his way. It was weird! I was about to bolt, because the training I had, would not stop the guy who just felled like twenty guys on his way, but something, not fear, took hold of me and I just…those eyes… It was like ten seconds in which I looked into his eyes and saw so many emotions in them, that I could not understand and then I could not move….ten seconds and he was already there in front of me, not attacking but there!

   Alfonse came before Lif had taken me or whatever he was going to do. He ended up with a bruised knee and ankle. I went to help him with some salves and bandages when we were done with the rest of the more serious injured people. He took off his shoe and rolled up the under armor. His ankle was not swollen and his knee was bruised but it was not swollen. I put some salve any way.  

  -What happened? I saw it from afar and felt I would not get there fast enough. Where was Dimitri?- He said a little angry, since King Dimitri was one of my supports alongside him and he was tasked today with being my guardian. I was still massaging his ankle not even thinking about it.

  -They were circling us from the back and Dimitri had to fall back to take care of it…Umm…I don’t know what happened. It was weird. He looked at me and he just…

   -I saw it too.- Said Sharena who came to stand behind Alfonse.- It was like he hit you with a spell.

   -It didn’t feel, like a magic attack. I was more like… I don’t know…- I felt weird about it, so I just made some stupid joke to lighten the mood- Why didn’t y’all tell me your grandpa was so hot? Heh , heh, heh heh! What? It’s not my fault! He kind of looks like you Alfonse.- Hey I was nervous and I do this when I get nervous!

   At first They gave me their “ Seriously?” stare, but Sharena catches on quick and starts laughing out loud. Alfonse? Well he scowls and close his eyes and then takes his foot away from my hands. What?? wait I didn’t get the chance to enjoy that! Damn! Next thing I know, he is taking his sock and starts putting in on. I see his smooth white skin peppered with… is that golden hair? Does it have a blue in it? and my throat closes dry. I follow his movements, as hypnotizing as a dance, rolling up that white sock that is taking away my hopes and dreams. Then the under armor goes down and boot on. It took him like ten seconds, that I totally did not count. Then his hands were covered as well.

 I look up at him with my hands still hovering in the same place as when he took away his leg and see him smiling sideways. I compose myself and…Wait…What? Is he doing this on purpose? Seriously? And the worst part is, that it should not bother me at all, but the truth is…I am very bothered by it. He has become a some sort of taboo to me and GOD how I love the guy! If it was someone else like Robin who never looses that coat of his and globes; I would not care! But I love him Lord. Why is he like this? I used to thank God I was not one of those feet fetishes people, and now I will be dreaming of his feet.  Thanks Alfonse!

 Joking. I respect feet fetish people. To each their own.

 The point is that I feel like those people in Victorian novels, where they get all hot and bothered by someone’s ankle showing more than normal! Oh but what an ankle that was tho’. Stop. Focus!

   I resolve to see him as clinically as any other hero and not stare at the shape of his ears and think of how I want to whisper how much I love him while kissing it…Grrr…I’m doing it again.

   Days later we see Lif again and Alfonse is cursed…We have nine days. Good thing Hel has not seen The Ring or it might have been only seven. Yeah I joke now, but back then I was about to commit murder and then kill myself…or something just as dramatic.

 We searched for days, a way to undo the curse and we found nothing. You’d think I would have taken a page from Dean Winchester's book and played the “last days on Earth” trope to get into his pants; but to be honest nothing like that even crossed my mind at the time! I was so desperate to keep him alive that nothing else matter to me. He could have paraded naked in front of me at the time I was at the library and I would not have noticed…Well, maybe I would have, but it didn’t happen so it doesn’t count

   Until the sixth night of the curse.

   There was a knock at the door to my chamber. Oh! Did I mentioned we have a shared study? Because we do. It is between our chambers and it can only be entered from our rooms. It was his idea and it was for safety reasons. The nights I have spent sitting by the chimney staring at his door…but never mind that. He knocked at my chamber door and when I opened it, he was about to leave. He was wearing sleeping pants, a long sleeve night shirt and socks, all in white.

   We had fallen asleep next to each other at the library before of course, especially during the days he was cursed. And yes we used to huddle together during our march through Nifl. It was effing cold OK. We also usually had our sleeping rolls next to each other during campaigns, because we fall asleep while talking or after a watch,but we had never slept together on a bed. Beds are…intimate to him I suppose.

This night however, he came in and he just goes on and sit on my bed. He said nothing. I sat next to him and reached over to give him a hug. He took this as his cue and hugged back and didn’t let go. He clung to me with such force I was starting to feel dizzy. I asked him to stay the night. He nodded and still said nothing. I blew out the candle I was using to read and we went to sleep while he hugged me tightly. It was no surprise to me, but it was not so much fear that I could see in him. It was so many emotions, that fear seemed to be the least of his problems; but of course he was afraid. We spend together the following nights of his curse. Funny thing is …all those nights I dreamed of his Grandpa, watching over from my balcony window.

  And did I had a glimpsed of something while sleeping together? No. He came in and blew the candle out and by the time I woke up he was already awake. Not like I would have gone and taken advantage of his sleeping form to explore or something. I just thought later that if I had woken up before him, then may be I would have seen his shirt riding up or his pants lowered a little or maybe his sock had fallen off or something. Oh well…They were still the best nights of my life, even if they didn’t feel like that at the time. I mean, I got to be held like I was the most precious and sacred treasure in the world by my beloved. I would care for nothing else.

 Then…Grandpa is actually Alfonse from the future…

 Lif, as he goes by now, told us everything that had happened in his Askr. Which is weird because I had been dreaming of something like that and I thought it was stress.

 We spent some days in that dead world and I got to see Lif a few times. He looked curious about me, but at the same time I noticed he was avoiding me. The way he looked at Sharena really broke my heart every time I caught him starting at her. In turn Sharena looked ready to adopt him, if only he would let her do it.

One of those night I was having a nightmare about me dying while I saw Anna drop dead as if by magic. I woke up to find Lif watching me from afar. I got up and went to talk to him before he ran away.

 We talk for a while. I do not want to intrude on painful memories, but he seems to know me so well it feels natural to talk to him, just like it is to Alfonse.

 -You two…you are not lovers yet?- He asks eyeing me sideways.

 -No. Where you…?

 -Yes. After the first attack. We spent some weeks fighting Hel together. Is he still playing hard to get then?-Oh and there it was.

 -Oh! So it is not my imagination! God I thought I was going insane! Oh that Bunny suit messed me up! I love that chest!…wait. Is that why you have your chest out? - He nods.- And the glow…I noticed Thrasir does not have that glow and I love glow in the dark…ermm… It is an awesome design I have to say. I like it. It is sexy.- I felt bad for the lack of tact but at the same time he needed to know I did not find him ugly or scary any more.

 -You were always odd like that Summoner.- He says that in his deep voice, and it conveys a lot of feelings.

 Did he let me touch his chest? No…and I didn’t really ask to be honest. My respects to Lif. He gave up everything for us. I owe him a lot.

 Well, now I knew for sure and I could confront him or let him keep doing it, or maybe just seduce him. It was strange. I always thought it only worked on men, but I guess it does work goes both ways! At least it help me to fall in love with his mind and heart first, not his body.

 Next day we were walking out of Lif’s castle when the floor gave in and Alfonse and I fell through it. Luckily it was not even high, but I am not as tall as Alfonse and with my luck, part of my coat and shirt got caught on a sharp part of a broken stone pillar, and I was left hanging about one feet off the ground by one shoulder. I tried wiggling off the coat but I could not do it.

 -Are you hurt _____?- Alfonse asks worriedly getting up from where he landed on the floor.

 -No! I think I just got scratched! But I can’t unhook my self.

 - Only you _____.- Says Alfonse smiling and getting dust out of his uniform.

 -Thanks Alfonse…Can you help me down?

 He looks around and up for a while and then stares at me for a few minutes. Probably thinking how to approach the problem, but seriously I think he could just reach up and unhook me. He is tall enough for that.

  He comes close to me and circle my waist with his left arm and places his left leg between my legs to find leverage on the pillar behind me. He reaches over my head with his right arm to unhook my coat. Being this close to him is so exiting. My heart begins to race and I start feeling kind of hot. I try not to think about it and avoid my gaze from his face, but I can’t help looking at him.

 There was not much light coming down from the hole above us, but I could see the side of his face and ear…yeah the same ear I wanted to…OK! Not now! He took this time to move his leg up to hold my weight up, and I was left straddling it. He kind of wiggled it to adjust and…Oh boy! It felt good, good.

<< Oh no! Don’t move it anymore…>> I was praying for him not to move that leg, because God in heaven, I was going to come right there and then.

 …And he moved it again but higher and harder…

 -Mmmn- Oh GOD! I did not just moan into his ear. I mean, I am not horny all the time, come on! It is just that, he is so close I can smell him. He smells so deliciously manly, and his leg is touching just the right places!!

 Meanwhile he is frozen in place. It seems like he is thinking about what to do or maybe just not thinking at all. I personally think he will be leaving me hanging there to be hones. I am so embarrassed, I lower my face to hide it, but we are so close, I end up hiding my face in the crook of his neck.

 He gasps and I can feel his arm tightening on my waist and I get even closer to him. I feel him moving his head a little as if to see my face and then…he moves the leg again as if testing it. This time slowly. I tried and fail to stifle another moan but it still comes out. He moves his hips upwards and keeps moving the leg. It creates just the right amount of friction needed. I feel my hips move on their own to meet him.

 -Alfonse…- My legs tighten around his and when I come close to his manhood I can feel his arousal as well.

 -_________- He whispers my name softly as my leg touches him. All this while he is still moving that blessed leg back and ford. I am panting at this point and he feels like he is in the same situation. All of this brought me to my knees. I came hard. I sat there shuddering in his arms and biting my hand because the stone caused every little noise to sound louder. I felt him kissing my hair.

 We heard some loud footsteps up above us and then…

 -Hey! You need help down there!- I hear Barst’s voice over my head. He does not sound or look like he heard anything.

 -We are fine…I just need …to get her down.- Alfonse’s voice sound a little strained but Barst takes it to mean he es working on helping me down. Just like that, he unhooks my coat and lowers me down gently, still not letting go.

 -I’m getting a ladder!- He’s gone and we can hear his footsteps getting farther away.

 Alfonse steps forward still with me in his arms ,until my back is against the pillar and then looks at me and kisses me hard.

  I am dizzy by the time he lets go. - He is coming back.- He says against my neck and bites into it. I am sure they could hear that whimper that left my mouth. And can you blame me? He just bit into my neck and at the same time moved his hips in a way that I could feel his manhood rub against me. Both his hands were lowered to my hips and he used them to have me closer to him. All this while, he gave this utterly sexy guttural sound that almost sounded like a growl… He lets go, takes a step back and turns around, a moment later a ladder is lowered.

 -You go. I will explore down here a moment.- He says in a firm voice not looking at me.

  I go up the ladder still a little shaky and flushed. I tel Barst to let him explore to see what he can find, but to leave the ladder for him to get up. Darn I wanted to go “exploring” with him. Just imagining what he is doing down there is doing things to me. Good thing everyone thought I was scared of what had happened. I only had a scratch to show.

 He came back much later.

 …Well that was a lot of “exploring”.

 He comes to the camp outside the castle and we are ready to leave just after lunch. At first he seems reluctant to be near me. I am freaking out because well, overthinking and anxiety mixed with insecurities is a bad mix. Finally after half a day of travel, we make camp and post the watch. He comes and sit by my side when I am eating. We don’t talk about it until we are left alone to go to rest.

 -I…I apologize Alfonse. It wasn’t my intention. I…it just happened.- I tell him when he doesn’t speak.

 - It wasn’t my intention either…you don’t have to apologize. I have been wanting to tell you. I…have feelings for you. I just did not want to say it in a situation like that and not at a time like this. I wanted it to be special. I am in love with you _____.

 -I love you too Alfonse. I have for a long time… I’m sorry I ruined it…but I could not help but enjoy having you so near.- He is scarlet red, but smiling.- Which by the way, is your fault.- He looks puzzled.- Sir you are playing dirty.

 -How so? - He asks.

 -You are playing hard to get with my heart.

 -Oh that game you started playing with mine?-He asks arching an eyebrow.

 -What? Me? When? You don’t even let me see your hands for God’s sake. I never saw you flirting with me.

 -I…hold your hands.- He says blushing. Well that was so Alfonse of him.-…erm…You used to never take off that coat or those pants. You were all mysterious and unreachable- Mysterious? Well, firs time someone said that about me.

 -You wanted me to take off my pants?- He turns red again -I was…insecure. I mean look at those gorgeous women out there and I get all jealous and insecure. I felt safe with my coat on. What was your excuse?

 -The same…I am jealous and insecure…Well, I was at first, but then I noticed something about you. - I give him a questioning look.- You could look at any hero in the nude and not get flustered by it. When I asked you why; you told me they where just natural human bodies to you. You sounded like they were nothing special; like you had analyzed bodies so much you did not find them beautiful or sacred any more. You said you studied them at school and everyone paraded half naked in musical shows and the like. Later you told me you did find them beautiful in an artistic or scientific kind of way but it did not make it better to me.

 How to make someone like you fall in love….with me? I listened to you and how you praised my intellect and skills, and I knew you were attracted to those qualities, but there are other men with intellect and skills at home too. I needed to find a way to be special to you.

  It was only when we met that other Alfonse dressed in a bunny costume that I understood. The way you looked at him made me so envious and jealous. What was so special about him? I saw you ogle his body like he was the most sinful of apparitions, and he looked just like me! I was frustrated. That same evening I saw you looking differently at me, and I could not help but feel elated about it.

 I spied you looking intently at my naked hands and when I put on my globes, that look of disappointment did not escape my eyes. It occurred to me that you had never seen me in any state of undress and it must have been strange to you. I understood how you felt now. I have been watching heroes for years. Beautiful women I have been watching on a daily basis and none of them feel spacial, even if they have beautiful bodies,or incredible skills. Yet the day I saw you wearing regular clothes I …well I…- He blushed, lowered his face and left the sentence hanging.

 I flirted with the idea of letting you see more of me, but then I would just become like any other hero, and I wanted more than that. I want so much more.- Now he looked at me, and there was so much love and affection in his eyes, I could have melted in the spot.

 I have to confess I enjoyed seeing you flustered when you could see a little of me. That made me feel special, but I did not want to be just a mystery to you either. I wanted your heart and soul,your love not only your lust. I needed to to know you loved me.

  I had a talk last night with Lif. He told me they were lovers …His summoner and him. He told me I was being a fool just wasting time. He said that if you were anything like his ______, then you loved me, jut like his summoner did him. _______, I want what they had…I want everything, but I am afraid. Between this situation and the war with Embla…You understand me, don’t you?

 - I understand you. I suppose the time is not right. I don’t want to look back on the day we finally are together and remember all these tragedies. You know Alfonse. You were right about me and my take on “nakedness”. I guess we are on the same page now about desire too. To us, Desire comes from love. That is what makes you and your body especial to me. I fell in love with your sharp mind and your heart first, but also thanks to your “efforts” I can understand and appreciate how special a lover’s body is. You made me understand, that what I feel for you is true love, not just infatuation or lust. Thank you. We can wait if that is your wish…if not…I will not say ‘no’ to that to be honest. I leave it to your discretion…But Alfonse, next time you go “exploring” , I want you to know, I can always lend you a hand. ;)

                                     ~*~

  I write this on the day of Devotion. Alfonse and I had another talk and at the end, we decided to wait. Alfonse’s position is a little difficult, and now even more so after his father’s death. His personality makes me forget he is royalty, but the weight of his crown is a lot. He has more responsibilities and images to uphold. I want to think we have time to enjoy each other’s company, hearts and mind before we rush things any way.

 Well, I have to go, my family (Yes they are my family now) is waiting for me. Sharena informed me there is a huge surprise for me. Well, Anna did owed me some favors and she designed the costumes for the Royal family.I can’t wait see Alfonse! I hear he is wearing sandals XD Wink, wink!

 PS: Wait! I just realized something! Lif was actually spying on us!?

[lexacoolfox]

Is it ok to have nagito with a talentless fem S/O Whos really sensitive to the whole talentless topic and argues alot to defend herself? (while crying cause shes such a crybaby)

This is my first ask and I’m so excited! Even though I’m sure while I’m writing I’m will be slowly dying inside! But thank you for the ask!

Nagito with a talentless Female S/O who sensitive to the whole talentless topic and argues to defend herself. Also the reader Is a bit of crybaby

Warning: I might add sentive topics like toxic relationship, obsessive behavior, and of course angst.

As much I would love to lie and say you guys have a Great relationship. It’s not true

Nagito being…well Nagito…has a pretty messed up mind set on your relationship

He didn’t know why he fell in love with you. Your talentless! He’d be disgusted with himself at first. But then he gets this idea in his head that ‘you do have a talent! You just need help letting it shine!’

You love Nagito, afterall he’s sweet, caring, and super cute. But his obsession with ultimates and Hope is a little concerning and scary.

You didn’t mind not having a ultimate, you thought it was kinda like a chain. Your whole life is revolves around a single thing you do. You think as a talentless person means you have more freedom.

But Nagito makes that kinda hard to do.

You have hobbies like anybody else, but these hobbies to Nagito are ‘potential ultimate talents.’

“Nagito, why are you obsessed with me finding an ultimate talent!”

“S/O, I know you have an ultimate talent! You just need help finding it!”

“If I did wouldn’t you think I would’ve found it by now!”

“S/O. This is important! You can be a shining beacon of hope for the future!”

“Nagito, is all you look for in a person is their ultimate talent!?”

“S/O why are we talking about this? Why don’t you want an ultimate talent?”

“Cause it’s like a chain! My whole life revolved around one thing I’m good at? What if I like other things! When I’m talentless I’m allowed to explore my option! And I might not be an ‘ultimate’ at somethings but I’m at least good at them.”

“But if your an ultimate you’ll be in the main course at Hope peak academy. You know the best school in the world!”

“I already goes to Hope peak! And I might not be in the main course, I’m in the reserve course! I think that’s good enough for me.”

“S/O you shouldn’t settle for this! Come on let’s find your ultimate talent!”

This argument just broke you. You started crying. You didn’t know what else to do.

“Nagito…do you only love me because you think I have an ultimate talent?”

“What?”

“Do you even love me for me? Do you like my personality? Do enjoy spending time with me? Do you even like the way I look? Do you even care what we do together?”

“I-I-I”

“Wow…you can’t even answer.”

You had a bag with like a week of clothes and shoes and other things. You walked towards the door and put on a coat. And opened the door.

“Ah! S/O! Where you going?!”

“I’m going to stay at my friends for a while. I think we need a break. I want to clear my head.”

“Wait! S/O! Let’s talk about this!”

You saw your friends car and dashed to get inside not looking back cause if you did you know you would change your mind.

But you needed to do this. You needed to think about you and Nagito.

Nagito on the other hand was losing his mind. The second the car lost his sight it felt like things broke.

He started rethinking his actions. He realized he wasn’t thinking about what you thought or how you felt. He also pressured you into something you didn’t want to do. He also started remembering all the things you would do together. Like your guys first date to the fair. Or how you made him delicious chocolates for Valentine’s Day. he still remembered how good they tasted. you would always try your best to cheer him up, when other would call him weird or crazy. You would step in and say “no he not, he just thinks a different way! It’s what makes him fun and interesting!” you were a wonderful partner to him. What was he. Just a jerk who pressured you into finding an ultimate talent. He started texting you saying how sorry he is and begging you to come back.

Monday

Your POV:

You were at school sitting in class waiting for the teacher, you arrived early so you wouldn’t have to see Nagito. Hajime a friend of yours walked in and noticed how sad you seemed.

“Hey S/O, why do you look so down today?”

“Me and Nagito got into an argument and we are taking a break. It’s just I want to clear my head but I feel so horrible. Like trash.”

“Hey isn’t that Nagito’s line?”

You chuckled at that a little. Which was Hajime intention.

“How about you hangout with me and chiaki near the fountain after school?”

“Chiaki…isn’t she that ultimate gamer girl you always talk about?”!

“Yeah. Me and her play games by the fountain near the school.”

“Yeah I think that could be fun, but if I see Nagito there I’m going to have to leave.”

“Ok ok I’m sure you won’t see Nagito there.”

Nagito POV:

Nagito didn’t see you at the front gate, he waited until he had to go to class. Everybody seemed to notice how sad he was. Nagito normally no matter what has a smile on his face, but he was just staring at his desk and tapping his finger on it. Kazuichu went up to his desk

“Yo Nagito, what your deal man? Why do you look so, out of it?”

“I’m just think what a horrible boyfriend I am.”

“Oh did something happen between you and S/O did she finally dump your crazy *ss?” Hiyoko asked

“No she wanted to take a break. I don’t know what to do.”

“W-well ma-maybe y-you should a-apologize.” Mikan timidly added

“I’ve tried texting, calling her, but she won’t answer. I even waited like an hour and a half at the front gate for her.”

“Oh. she was already in here classroom before you showed up.” Peko added

“What did you to get into an argument about?” Sonia questioned

“Sonia we really shouldn’t ask. it’s their personal business.” Mahiru said

“But if we now what it was maybe we can help.” Akane said

“Do you guys have nothing better to do than to get involved in peoples love life?” Fuyuhiko asked annoyed

“Well I mostly like to know cause I like drama!” Teruteru said

“Both you shut up! Nagito tell us before we have a classroom battle.” Akane said

“…me and S/O had a fight about her having an ultimate talent…”

“Nagito are you serious! You know she’s sensitive about that topic!” Mahiru scolded

“I know I know. But it’s just I think she has an ultimate talent and I want to help her find it!”

“Do you think she not good enough for you if she doesn’t have an ultimate talent?” Peko question

“Is all you look for in a relationship is somebody skill or talent?” She also added

“No! Of course not! She’s great even without an ultimate! But I think she could be even better with one!”

“Nagito, I hope your listening to yourself man! Imagine saying that to her face. What do you think she would feel?” Kazuichu said

“Nagito, she would feel like she good enough the way she is! That can result in two things. One she’ll change herself for you, she could be somebody with an ultimate but not somebody who happy and joyful. She could end up being miserable. Or two she’ll feel like you’ll only love her for her talent, and S/O is smart, she will know not to stay with you if you only loved her for that.” Chiaki said surprising everyone, she was normally very quite.

“Yeah, you guys are right! I could be forcing her into a terrible life!”

“Now the question is how you going to make it up to her?” Mahiru said

“I don’t think an apology will be enough.” Hiyoko said

“Yeah maybe you should do something special!” Kazuichu said

“Like what?”

“Oh you could write her a song! Ibuki will help you get your lover back!” Yelled ibuki

“No, he should take her to a remote spot somewhere and have a delicious meal! Yours truly could prepare it for you too! A classy dinner by candle light.” Teruteru said

“M-maybe to t-take h-her too see a m-movie.” Mikan suggested

While everybody was brainstorming on what Nagito should do. Nagito thought of a wonderful idea. He quickly told everybody what he wants to do. Everyone who was in on the planning thought it was a great idea.

“It’s kinda funny, you used to say how you hated people without ultimates. But you ended up dating somebody without an ultimate.” Fuyuhiko said

“Yeah I don’t know why but I know I’m not ready to lose her!”

“I thinks a creature beyond thins mortal dimension had put an enchantment on the both of you, hence drawing you two together!” Gundham said

Lunch

You ate your lunch in the bathroom, in walked chiaki from Nagito class! You panicked and was ready to put your lunch away and run away!

“S/O can I talk to you?”

“As long it’s not about Nagito.”

“Oh…um…”

“…fine spit it out what do you want to know.”

“Well, actually Nagito was wondering if you can meet him up at this certain building at the top floor later tonight around 9:00pm. He has something for you.”

Honestly you were skeptical but also curious, your curiosity got better of your skepticism and said you would go. She left so you could enjoy your lunch. You texted Hajime telling him you had a change of plans.

Later at some building on the top floor at 9:00pm

You went to the room chiaki texted you and with a heavy sigh you knocked on it. Not even a second later it opened. You could see Nagito with tears in his eyes

“You actually came! I’m so happy!”

“Hey Nagito…what did you want to meet me here for?

“I have a surprise for you!”

He covere your eyes and guided to an elevator and pressed a button. When you made it to your destination, your eyes were still covered but you feel a gust of wind. You guys were on the roof! He uncovered your eyes and you saw a gorgeous sight

He set up a little spot for you guys.

“Nagito...”

“I set this up for us! I brought a Bluetooth speaker so we can listen to your favorite songs! I set blankets and pillows around so we’re comfortable! I also brought some of your favorite snacks and drinks! Also some food teruteru made for us! I got lights so it couldn’t get too dark! I also set the blanket up and brought a projector so we can watch a movie, any movie you want! I also thought we could star gaze!”

You were speechless. Nagito set this all for you! You started crying.

“S/O, Darling, my love, My hope! Please forgive me for how I treated you. I was so foolish to realize that your perfect with it without an ultimate talent. That is a decision for me not to decide! That’s yours! All I can do is ask for your forgiveness!”

“Nagito! I-I! Of course I forgive you! I can’t believe you did all of this for me!”

You both shared a passionate kiss. The night was spent watching a movie, listening to music and maybe a bit dancing, had some snacks and drinks, at one point you guys were lying on the blankets and looking at the stars, out of nowhere a bunch shooting stars were flying across the sky. It made everything so beautiful.

“The stars are so beautiful!”

“Yes they are, but I see two especially beautiful ones.”

“Really where?”

He turned your face towards his and softly cupped your face with his hands.

“Your eyes. They shine brighter than any star in the sky.”

You blushed at that. Your love for Nagito probably grew 3 times that night.

“S/O, I really am sorry for how I treated you. Will you please stay with me?”

“I forgive you Nagito and of course I will stay with you!”

“Wow lucky me! Hehehe this might be wrong to say. But I think I found your ultimate talent.”

“Really what?”

“Your my ultimate lover.”

“Hehehe. I think your my ultimate lover too.”

“I love you my hope.”

“I love you most Nagito.”

Not the ending you were expecting right! I really hope you enjoyed it! Also thank you nuttytalepatrol for this suggestion. It was a challenge but one I enjoyed, also summer break is coming soon! So expect more posts from me! Also sends ask and I’ll do my best. I prefer if you ask for characters I’ve already done. Until next time!

-Lexacoolfox

[flyswhumpcenter]

Bad Things Happen Bingo! The event where you send me requests according to this marvelous card! (Red cross is the completed prompt, character headshots are prompts I’ve already filled. Green deltas are for requested prompts, which is none rn, as my inbox is empty.)

[SPOILERS FOR SWORD & SHIELD’S ENDGAME START HERE].

"Let the adults take care of it," he said.

"Comatose" is a weird prompt, and yet I somehow came up with two prompts. One of them was Hop-centric and I'm absolutely gonna write it one of these days, but I wasn't sure if it fitted that well. The second one is, well, this. It came to me shortly after figthing Eternatus, when Hop says this in the hotel: "And still Lee's... well, he's being Lee. Insisting on having a Championship Match with you today. It's a bit much, isn't it? You're sure you're up for it? I'm not even too sure about him. He was out cold and hurt pretty badly himself during all that mess". So this focuses on a weird interpretation of the prompt, but considering I do focus on a comatose state here, just from weird POVs, I think it counts. It was really fun to write from the perspective of Gloria and especially Hop. I'm absolutely self-indulgent in making some edits in there to what's actually happened in canon. I like having some wiggle room to work with, y'know?

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Calm After the Storm

Summary: After the adrenaline and dopamine that come with winning a battle, comes dealing with some immediate casualties. It turns out that, sometimes, adults can't take care of everything. Gloria and Hop learn their lesson on the field, in an elevator, a corridor, a hotel bedroom. (Or: a self-indulgent depiction of a scene Hop alludes to before your battle against Leon).

Fandom: Pokémon Sword & Shield

Wordcount: 3.1K words

Event hosted by @badthingshappenbingo​.

AO3 version available here.

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Sighing in relief, Gloria picks up the still-smoking ball she’s thrown onto Eternatus. Who knows what could have happened to the people of Galar if they had failed to defeat it… But that was her fear, an anxiety that didn’t get to become real thanks to their combined efforts, and now, she gets to smile with Hop and thank from the bottom of her heart the Sword and Shield from the legend who came to save their region. They’ve done most of the job, after all; and if she had a way to truly thank them, she’d have absolutely gone to the end of the world to do so.

Still, Zacian and Zamazenta leave shortly thereafter, forgetting to take the sword and shield they got invoked by. Hop grins wider than he’s ever had despite the dark rings under his shining eyes and messy hair strands, and she can’t be much more different than him at the moment. She puts away Eternatus’s ball in her bag and goes to hug her best friend as tightly as possible. In the ruin-like top of the tallest building of Hammerlocke, they forget about the darkness that almost engulfed them and everyone they’ve ever cared about and those they know only from view or say. They’ve made it, they’re both safe, and they can now go sleep for three days…

“Wait.”

 Hop, whose expression suddenly drops, lets go of her as he notices Charizard flying towards them. If they’re both washed over by flows and flows of relief, his brother’s most famous partner really isn’t, draconic features frowned. The poor guy, who still bears some bruises and scratches from weakening Eternatus with the rest of his team, is trying to tell them something.

“I think we’re forgetting something,” Hop tells her, worry rapidly painting all over his face. “We got so caught up in that fight that…”

“Now that you mention it, I do have that feeling too… Wait!”

That Charizard is…

“Lee!!”

 Hop rushes in the opposite direction to Charizard, pushing on his legs as if they had never experienced the raw power of Eternatus looming over the entire region. Gloria follows suite, her heart skipping a bit as she ignores the pain in her feet, the purple half of the Master Ball Leon tried to throw before crackling under her sole.

When she stops, she sees her friend shaking his brother laying face-first on the floor. It seems like either Hop or Charizard has dragged him there in a hurry after Eternatus broke out of his attempt at catching it, leaving him in quite a pitiful state. There’s quite an heartache to have over seeing the Champion in such a disgraceful, painful-looking pose; and yet nothing beats the cries of urgency breaking out of Hop’s throat.

 “Lee, answer me!”

Gloria kneels to her friend’s level, making sure she isn’t accidentally stomping on anyone’s limbs. For a moment, the only sounds are Charizard’s wings flapping, Hop catching his breath and the peaceful wind blowing the dark red clouds away.

“He’s not waking up!” He says as he looks at her, restless and breathless, before going back to looking at his brother. “Lee, dammit, stop sleepin’ like that you big Slowpoke!!”

 In silence, she starts inspecting Leon. He’s got bruises all over his limbs from what she can see, cuts and scratches that sometimes are decorated with dried blood, and she doesn’t dare point out how… exhausted he seems. They all are, truth be told, but there’s something about seeing such an energic grown-up lying on the floor unable to wake up and get on with his day, that simply aches.

 Watching Hop trash around like that pains her just as much. The relief and joy they felt until they remembered about the third party who tried saving Galar before they had even gotten there in the first place is now gone, eaten away by brotherly instincts. She grabs him by the sleeve, shaking her head, as he stars at her, helpless.

“I don’t think he’s going to wake up anytime soon, Hop.”

“W-what are you…”

“We can’t do anything about it ourselves, can we? Let’s just bring him to someone who can.” She tries smiling to ease the distress in his eyes. “I’m certain the Champion’s just as tired as we are.”

Gloria knows that isn’t entirely true. Leon didn’t just fall asleep when all of this mess was going down, as he couldn’t have with how noisy and adrenaline-inducing Eternatus’ appearance was. However, this alone doesn’t give her the impulse to straight-up tell Hop about it. Nobody is going to leave this world today, she knows it, but in the meantime, can she really blame a boy for being worried about his sibling?

 “Yeah, you’re right,” he finally says as he gives his Dubwool a Repel and summons it out of his ball again. He smacks his cheeks and tries smiling. “Mind giving me a hand? Lee’s kinda too heavy for me to lift on my own…”

“No problem.”

She calls for her Cinderace to help them out, entrusting her first companion with being delicate when handling their Champion.

  -------------------

Going down from the top floor of the tower is slow. Neither of them is speaking: they’re both too tired and too speechless for that. Gloria doesn’t even know if her words would make things better or worse: what is she supposed to say, in that kind of situation? Instead, she just stands her, fumbling with her

Hop’s eyes never leave his brother, even when he blinks, lying on his Dubwool who shows little signs of still being amongst them aside from his chest rising and falling. Dubwool himself is very static: it may be the fatigue of the wild day they’ve all experience, it may be the worry of his Trainer transmitting itself to him, it may be something else.

 There is no Macro Cosmos employee to fight against them and no music in the lift that people she had never met before were praising to them something like an hour ago. She glances, from time to time, to Dubwool, to Leon, to Hop, and everything else feels too silent now that tension has died down. If there was too much noise before, there is now too little left of it.

Yet, Gloria prevents herself from humming to pass the time. It just doesn’t feel right to suddenly break into a song when there is so much on all of their hearts, even if it’s to alleviate that weight, so she remains silent. She doesn’t like any single bit of the aura of mourning this gives to the situation, the heaviness of the air, the tapping of their feet echoing as they impatiently wait for the elevator to go down. Nothing about this feels right.

 It should’ve been a time to celebrate. They should’ve been chattering away like birds, discussing the tournament, the Gym Challenge, stuff kids are supposed to be hyped about, right? They’ve just saved the world. They should feel nothing but relief and happiness; and yet, she can only see Hop ball up his fists in his pants’ pockets, silent, head hanging down with his eyes fixated on one person.

If she was trying to convince herself earlier that Leon may have fainted, but could have just fallen back asleep when they were fighting Eternatus (that barely makes sense, but she supposed that, if you were tired and a heavy sleeper enough…), the fact he’s reacted to nothing until now, not even the monstrous cries of Eternatus, the vigour of Zacian and Zamazenta, the frantic screams of his brother or being moved around, can only tell her he’s comatose.

And that word stings her tongue.

 “Y’know, that’s kinda stupid, when I think about it.” Hop suddenly says, trying to draw a smirk on his face.

“What do you mean?”

“I know Lee’s gonna be alright. He’s always been alright, even if he’s scared Mom and Dad before. I’m sure he gave Sonia heart attacks while on their Gym Challenge. There’s no reason he won’t be now, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Lee’s the undefeated Champion of Galar, and yet, I’m scared for him and all… That’s dumb, I know it, but… But I can’t not worry! He should’ve woken up by now, right?”

She doesn’t know quite to respond. Mom often says fear can be an irrational feeling or reaction… but it doesn’t sound like a rightful explanation.

 “He’ll be fine, sure, but when?”

Gloria doesn’t have an answer to give him, or, at least, no answer that’d sound truthful yet optimistic. Hop shakes his head and goes back to being silent, putting the hat falling out of his brother’s head back on top of it. Over and over again.

 When the elevator’s doors open, she lets go of a breath she’s held for too long.

 ---------------

 Truth be told, Sonia didn’t plan on watching the championship unless Hop or Gloria made it to the finals. She was somewhat blissfully unaware of the surprise cancellation, only learning it when she saw the two kids running past her and into the Slumbering Weald, barely getting an explanation on the situation from them. Thus, she only flew to the bubbling, buzzling Wyndon when learning about what had happened with Eternatus and the Chairman and all that jazz. It’d still serve as study material, even if she had other reasons to attend…

A surprise was waiting for her there and, like most surprises in her life, it wouldn’t be a good one.

 What she finds in Wyndon is people stuck between shock and relief and an aura of worry. People speak amongst them, some recognize her, and she tries her best to sneak her way into the hotel where Nessa told her to go. Her friend was fairly vague in her wording, mentioning she could be interested in what had unfolded for her research. Her voice sounded less confident than usual and she could hear, from the other side of the line, the discussions amongst themselves of other familiar voices, mostly Leaders’. The only thing she was able to clearly distinguish was, however, Milo asking Nessa if she wanted a drink. How mindful of him.

That’s only the first layer: she’s allowed into the hotel fairly easily for being the new regional professor, much to her wallet’s relief considering how pricy and luxurious this hotel seems to be, and plans on heading to the floor Nessa told her the number of. However, instead of going through with it, her eye immediately spots Hop on an inferior floor, pacing in the corridor, taping his foot whenever he stops, hands deep inside his pockets.

 When she engages the conversation, he seems far less optimistic than she’s mostly seen him be. He seems somewhat evasive, trying to escape a conversation, as if time’s running out. She can only point that out.

“You look like you’re in a hurry, Hop, what’s wrong?”

“Lee’s not waking up.”

The sentence pinches something inside of her.

“You can’t possibly mean this man is sleeping peacefully when he’s meant to battle Gloria as soon as possible, right?”

“That’s because he’s not sleepin’.”

 Before Hop can add anything, Sonia opens the door behind him, an alarm ringing in her head with a bloodcurdling shrill. That’s what was giving her the weird feeling about this entire situation! Of course he’d have called to tell her how excited he was about this entire thing, he’d have posted about it on his social media, and if not him, then it’d have been Hop.

Sonia doesn’t remember having ever seen Leon comatose, or having to worry about that before, so she busts open the door and gets her fears confirmed in an explosion of silence.

----------------------

Hop’s sitting on a chair, waiting. He got tired of pacing, and so did the hotel staff, so instead he’s sitting on a chair next to a bed. At some point, there was Sonia with him, before she had to go do something else. At another, there was Raihan pretending not to care (and really being bad at it). At yet another, there was Gloria yawning her jaw out. Time’s been slow. He knows these people were there for less than an hour each.

Actually, it’s only been something like three hours at most. Time’s just been really, really slow. He fiddles with Dubwool’s Ball in the meantime, ears wide open for the smallest sound, fingers impatient. It’s night outside, which he sees through the mostly-closed curtains to the black sky and little yellow dots from the never-sleeping Wyndor.

 His eyes flutter with the wind. It’s hard to stay awake now that the fatigue of the past few days settles down and the adrenaline of saving Galar is fading away. It’s too calm to stimulate him and yet, clutching on the hope that his brother really is sleeping, he doesn’t want to disturb his rest. He hopes Gloria has managed to find a way to fall asleep and that she’s having some beautiful dreams while he stays here, as a vigil.

He puts away Dubwool’s Ball for a bit and just stares at his brother. Lee looks oddly peaceful, lying like this in a comfortable and silky-soft bed, despite the circumstances he’s found himself in and the crease his eyebrows are making. It’s odd to see him without his signature hat, or his cape, or even just being the Champion. It’s weird seeing him that way after spending so much years only seeing him through the screen of the telly. For once, he feels like the stronger sibling.

That should’ve satisfied him, or at least given him some joy, but all he can think about is how wrong it’s rubbing him. It’s not meant to be. Not that way, at least.

He yawns like a Snorlax, sustaining his head up with faulting elbows. He can’t exactly see Lee’s little injuries here and there as most of his body is covered by a blanket, even if the band-aid on his cheek already says a lot; and so does seeing his uniform displayed on hangers in the room and his cap neatly put on a bedside table, untouched, its crown pattern hidden in the shadows. He can’t turn on the lights more than just the lamp on the table in case Lee opens his eyes and gets blinded by the brighter ones of the ceiling. The darkness doesn’t help him stay awake, but it just has to be that way.

He’s no Champion of Galar, and he may never become one unlike what he’s promised to himself ever since Lee became the undefeatable; yet it’s like he’s the one in charge tonight.

 -------------------

 A gentle shake on his shoulder makes him slowly open his eyes, clarity coming to him in a burst. It takes a while for him to truly come back to the surface, as if his sense were numb with tiredess. Finally creaking an eyelid open, he notices there’s someone else awake, lit by the gentle morning sky seeping through the curtains..

“Hop?”

He releases a sigh of relief. That’s finally something good and worth rejoicing over.

 “Lee?! Since when have you been awake?”

His brother looks a little confused, and the dark rings and bruises haven’t entirely disappeared, but nonetheless, he smiles.

“Not much… You should go to bed, Hop, it’s late.”

His yawn gets interrupted by Lee getting back on his arms, exposing a couple bandages on his forearms in the process. He jumps wide awake, as if he had never felt comatose in the first place.

“What are you doing?!”

“I’m gonna go on with my day,” he visibly winces when tucking away the strands of hair that have stuck themselves all over his face. “I’ve slept for long enough.”

“W-wait, don’t get up!”

 It’s the pain in his bandaged shoulder, of which he can see a bit of under the right sleeve of the sleepwear they gave him, that actually makes Lee lie back down, not his words, and he knows that.

“You’ve been out cold for a while, and you’re hurt and stuff, you shouldn’t be moving!”

“I didn’t know you became a doctor while I wasn’t looking, Hop”, his brother laughs as he scratches his head.

“Very funny, Lee,” he laughs back, “but that’s what the doctors said while you were knocked out. You’ve really made us worry!”

“Hah… I passed out before Gloria and you saved the day, right?”

 The tone drops in mood. It’s like rubbing salt in a wound he thought was closed.

“…Yeah. Charizard dragged you to safety after he protected us. I guess you really saw nothing of that…”

“I haven’t, I’m sorry. I should’ve taken care of it myself.”

“I was terrified to see you get knocked out like that… And you wouldn’t wake up! It’s like you didn’t react to anything around you!”

Lee scoffs. “I really was out cold, huh… Well, don’t worry, it’s all good now. Gloria and you have saved Galar and everything’s back to normal, right?”

He nods.

“Good. It’d have been terrible if either of you had gotten injured. Now, if you’ll excuse me,” he tries getting up again, slower, gentler, and it’s still not okay because he’s still wincing at each move he makes, “I have a match to dispute against this year’s challenger…”

“You’re not in a condition to have a battle, Lee!”

 His brother stares at him for a few moments, silent, before smiling again.

“If I stay here, will you go get breakfast?”

“For you too or just –”

“For you. You’re tired, go back to sleep.”

Hop can’t prevent himself from proving the point by yawning. He’s sore from the weird position he’s fallen asleep in…

“Okay, okay; but you stay here, right? Otherwise I’m gonna send you Sonia or Raihan!”

Another chuckle ensues.

“Wouldn’t want to be scolded at by Sonia, I must have scared her us enough. See ya later.”

“See ya, Lee,” he says as he gets up, almost falls from how wobbly his legs are, and gets out of the room.

 There’s undeniable irony in the fact that, right before leaving the room, he notices Lee has fallen back asleep. Seems like the comatose state didn’t constitute as proper rest. Better get some food and sleep before he follows.

On the way out, he spots Sonia, who enters the room right afterwards. Passing by her, then in the corridors, he stops in front of a window giving onto the busy streets of the city. The heart more at peace, he finds that the sun has never shone this bright in Galar.

[do-what-the-knight-tells-you]

Broadchurch: The Short Story Collections Volume 2  Available over here This second volume contains another four short stories, also ostensibly intended 1 per episode, but they take place at very different times. I read them interspersed, (watch ep 5, read first story, watch ep 6, read etc), but it might be fun to read them in an actual chronological order during a re-watch.

1- “Protection”, Sharon Bishop (Joe Miller’s Lawyer), During the S2 trial, specifically the night following episode 5. Serious, heavy, dramatic insight into her character over the course of a terribly busy evening that includes a dinner invite with Jocelyn and the judge, and her romantic partner surprising her at The Trader’s. Plus lots and lots of phone calls. Very interesting.

2- “One More Secret”, Beth, halfway through episode 6, this starts the evening after Tom’s testimony, and continues about 24-36 hours. Insight on Beth, how she’s coping (and Chloe), how she reacts to learning Mark’s “last secret”, that he was gonna leave her... oh, and discussion on her relationship with Ellie.

3- “The Leaving of Claire Ripley”, Claire (who would eventually marry Lee Ashworth), 10ish years before S1 maybe? This is The story of who she was before him, a relationship she got into, what she thought she wanted, and how it all went sideways, eventually forcing her to run from consequences for the first time. Basically, how she ends up in the right town/place to meet Lee, and get embroiled in the Sandbrook mess... and without any support network but him. Very interesting, totally unexpected. 

4- “Thirteen Hours”, Alec Hardy, pre Series 1, specifically, One Day before Series 1. Insight on Alec, before he meets Ellie, how he’s balancing Claire, his illness, and secrecy, in the new town, in the new job. Hint: Barely. 13 hours from his life, probably 20 hours before Danny would die. Basically, the last “normal” day before Danny’s body is found and all goes to shit. Poor Sucker.

I’ve included summaries, my notes, excerpts, reactions, and other Things Of Interest under the readmore. Again, these story volumes are interesting, short, and worth the read for me!

1. Sharon bishop- during trial Before episode... 4? What morning is it she drives to see her kid? Ah, she pulls the all-night drive and sees her kid in prison in EP 3, so this takes place the night after that day in court. No, wait, after he's beaten up, so, maybe after ep 5? About to head home from the trial. Gets a phone call from her... Partner? Boyfriend? "Darroll". Not Jonah's dad, I don't think. She gets asked to dinner with Jocelyn and the judge Oh fuck, he shows up at The Trader’s when she specifically told him not to. She forgets to change, and bails out of there back for the judge’s place. Still making phonecalls about Jonah bearing beaten up. God she’s stressed. I can practically feel the anxiety and nausea drip off the page. Man, her POV on Jocelyn is cruel. Specifically, that Jocelyn is perfect and privileged, and never missed/misses an opportunity to put her down.   Man, Sharon fucking hates her. The judge makes a comment about Sharon being judge material in a few years, if she's interested, perfectly polite and congenial. Sharon turns it down, privately thinking that she likes the fight too much. Judge says she didn't think it was for her, either, until she suddenly found herself the first Asian woman. And even then, her dad was still disappointed. The whole conversation makes Sharon furious and resentful, of these smug women, their perceived privilege in comparison to her, the way she had to fight to build the ladder she climbed, the way she was never even expected to take A-levels, the way she had Jonah on a great track and it was "his kindness" that got him incarcerated and stuck on the "lowest rung" you can start on. "Sonia refills the glass; Jocelyn puts a hand over hers. ‘You must’ve had offers for the bench,’ Sonia says to Jocelyn, filling a new glass with sparkling water. Jocelyn’s eyes crinkle. ‘Too many other interests I would’ve had to give up.’ Sharon nearly chokes on her salmon. Jocelyn doesn’t have interests. She’s just trying to convince everyone – including herself – that her life has had any kind of meaning since she gave up work. Sharon makes a little coughing noise and Jocelyn looks at her sharply before turning back to Sonia. ‘I’m not good at impartial,’ she says, with a little shrug of false modesty." See, we know that Jocelyn quit because she was going blind. We know that she is regretful of the life, the love she felt she wasted. No way is she out (sexuality-wise), or I think Sharon might not be as furious with her privilege. Which, like, she definitely has, but Sharon is so tired and furious right now, she's equivocating the economic privilege Jocelyn undoubtedly has with "never having had to struggle or sacrifice for your job". We of course know and are sympathetic to how Hard Jocelyn had to work, probably one of the first women in her county/area to do what she did Every Time she did it. And we are sympathetic to the fact that she did that all while remaining closeted, and how miserable and hard that must have been... But Sharon doesn’t know some of that, and she’s too furious at the system, at economic privilege... and honestly, at herself, for having chosen to work so hard she missed things with her son. maybe things that led to this situation. Which she absolutely is blaming on the system, and not at all on anything else.   And they have such bitterness between them, Jocelyn probs had been a little jealous, a little "oh yeah, wear your wound on your sleeve, get everyone to cry for you", secretly angry that she never "was brave" enough to come out. At least her protege never had to lie, could be honest about who and what she was. There is a lot of shit between them on the subject of race and gender and privilege and stuff (Jocelyn did specifically mention that the decision to take Sharon on as a protege was partly a diversity hire, to “get more women”. Sharon is furious at that comment. I don’t know enough about race relations in the UK to know how contentious the fact that Sharon’s black would be... but considering the judge is also non-white, and Sharon is furious with her too, it’s clear the primary contention is money, even if race is a casual condition). And pride. I totally believe (agree with Jocelyn’s assertion) that Sharon has an issue taking blame. It must always be someone else's fault. And she doesn't care about morality a bit. She says to herself it's because justice didn't work for her kid, but I get the vibe from Jocelyn that that shit was in place long, long before. "Now they’re getting closer, thinks Sharon. ‘Not good at impartial’ is nothing but a euphemism for the fact that Jocelyn Knight is a dyed-in-the-wool prosecutor, although being her, she’s got to dress it up as a higher calling. She likes the chase, that’s what it boils down to. She might as well come into court dressed in a bearskin dress and wave a spear about. But Sharon knows that working for the Crown makes Jocelyn feel good because she can always tell herself she’s fighting the good fight. She believes her own lies, and that’s what makes her so good at her job. Defence, now that’s where the real fight is. You’ve got to have balls to speak for a defendant, run the risk they might be guilty. To take all the shit from the press and public that comes with it. 

“‘You do have to bite your tongue,’ Sonia admits. ‘Mind you, when I say something, people really bloody listen.’ Now that, Sharon likes the sound of. Instant respect. The kind she thinks Sonia and Jocelyn must take for granted. ‘Speaking of which, there’s something I need to say. Off the record. Because if this was official, we’d be in court, and you’d both be in the shit.’ Without raising her voice by a decibel, Sonia has managed to change her tone; if anything it’s smoother and calmer than before, and that’s more chilling than an angry rant. Sharon feels the blood banging in her cheeks and doesn’t risk looking at Jocelyn. ‘I heard your yelling halfway across the building, earlier,’ continues Sonia. ‘I’m presuming, since it hasn’t appeared on the Broadchurch Echo Twitter feed, that members of the press and public didn’t hear it, but that’s no thanks to either of you.’ 

“Caught red-handed; this morning’s angry words ring in Sharon’s ears and a schoolgirl shame burns like acid in her gullet. What could this mean for the case? For her career? Sharon is rarely lost for words but she can’t begin to talk her way out of this one. She feels like the walls of a maze are clanging down around her. Sonia’s still talking as the phone in Sharon’s pocket begins to vibrate. Without looking she knows it’s the prison governor. The call that will keep Jonah safe tonight is coming through now. Answer it, screams her conscience. Sonia’s voice is a burble in the background. Answer it. The twenty-year conflict between Sharon’s motherhood and her career feels condensed into these few seconds. Her skin feels too tight all over. She puts one hand in her pocket as if her fingertips could send the message for her: wait for me. Just give me one more minute. Sharon’s instincts tell her that even to break eye contact with Sonia Sharma right now would be professional suicide, never mind taking a phone call. The phone doesn’t ring for long: four, maybe five rings, before the caller hangs up. Sonia’s words come back into focus. 

“‘I told you both at the start: professionalism and dignity,’ she says, still more head girl than headmistress. ‘Keep your personal rows out of this case or it’ll be a full-scale public bollocking. Got it?’ Sharon nods as she absorbs the gist: she’s got away with it, in the broadest sense. Where she ought to feel relief there is only a crashing sense of failure and loss. In the ensuing silence, she can hear the food she’s chewing turn over in her mouth, but she can’t swallow it. She’s just about to push back her chair when Sonia comes in with what she clearly thinks is an ice-breaker. 

“‘So, you were her pupil?’ It’s a loaded question and Jocelyn doesn’t give Sharon a chance to answer. ‘I found her and brought her onto a scheme I was running to bring more women into the law. Particularly from underprivileged backgrounds.’ 

“Sharon explodes; too late, she sees the crumbs fly everywhere. ‘I was at Oxford by this point! She tells it like she pulled me out of the gutter.’ ‘She was the best I ever had. On course to be my Head of Chambers, if she’d stayed.’ It’s a reverse flip in the conversation. Sharon is so stunned that for a few seconds she forgets about the missed call. This is the first praise she’s ever had from Jocelyn Knight. She had always presumed the admiration flowed in one direction. Jocelyn let her go without a fight. 

“Resentment boils inside her and she doesn’t trust herself not to come back with sarcasm or worse. Sonia’s seen her with the gloves off now and it cannot happen again. She excuses herself to use the bathroom – beautiful, hand-painted tiles, organic handwash, only the best for the judge’s residence – and she splashes water on her face, tells herself in the mirror to get a grip. She dials her voicemail with shaking hands. There’s a message, not from the governor but from his assistant, saying that they’re waiting for her to return their call. Sod etiquette, Sonia and Jocelyn can amuse themselves for a few minutes: Sharon hits redial but she is locked out by the engaged tone. She waits one minute, then tries again. She repeats this three times with the same result. She weighs up her options – hide in the toilet for god knows how long, or make her excuses and leave? It’s an easy decision. 

“Back in the dining room, she realises there will be no need for excuses; the evening is already being wrapped up. ‘Thanks for a lovely supper,’ says Jocelyn, folding her napkin and getting to her feet. ‘But I should be getting back.’ Sonia leads her guests into the hallway. ‘No rest for the wicked.’ She nods through an open doorway to a study where case files are piled high on a table. They will all be working through the night. 

“Back in the car, Sharon sets her phone to hands-free and hits redial repeatedly. She is on the dual carriageway that leads into Broadchurch when at last the line is free. Hope spikes then crashes with each unanswered ring. There is nobody there. She’s missed her window. And she doesn’t know where Jonah is sleeping tonight. Reality is a punch in Sharon’s guts. She can’t save Jonah. She’s trying to remote-control his life, when the brutal truth is that it’s been out of her control, and his, since he found himself in the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong colour skin. The injustice of it burns. The miles between Sharon and Jonah seem to stretch out and then snap. The road swims before her, lights blurring to amber tadpoles against the black. Sharon pulls into a lay-by and bawls until her throat is sore and her eyes are gritty." Her partner is still at the hotel when she gets there, and I thought this section was particularly beautiful: "‘Oh, babe,’ and that’s all Darroll has to say. He places his knuckle on the point between her shoulder blades, the heart of the knot. He knows where her body keeps its secrets, and with his touch, she is undone. Afterwards, she waits until he has fallen asleep, as good as drugged. In these stolen hours the Traders hotel is as silent as it gets. No phones ring. Not a floorboard creaks, not a toilet flushes. There is only Darroll, the gentle rolling snore of him. Sharon is wired. Only four hours’ sleep in two days but she can’t remember feeling more awake. Darroll’s soothing effect is only temporary. It rushes through a drain and is replaced by thoughts of Jonah, his beaten-up face and a circle of thugs closing in on him." She gets up and back to research the appeal for Jonah's case. (God, she's working so hard there, so distracted from the Miller stuff, it really is a mark of how fucked the Broadchurch investigation was, or how ruthless and rule-break-y Sharon is, that her side ends up winning) "She has a career's worth of favors to call in, and she isn't too proud to do it." Determined as fuck, and unwilling to not succeed. Heck of a character. . 2. One more secret- Beth- during trial, partway through episode 6 (where Tom lies on the stand in Joe's defence), I think after Tom's testimony, that night, before Mark's She gets home, longest she's been away from Lizzie. "‘Where are my girls?’ she calls while her key’s still in the door. Chloe emerges from the sitting room, a puke-stained muslin cloth draped over each shoulder. Chloe’s dropped out of college but she can’t get a job until the trial’s over because Beth needs her for the childcare. If Beth can’t be with Lizzie, then it’ll have to be someone else who loves her. The baby needs to be with her own blood. The time spent with the baby seems to be helping Chloe, too. It’s taken her mind off her own problems; the spoiled GCSEs, losing her nan, and the break-up with Dean (who left Dorset for the chance to shear sheep in New Zealand, only telling Chloe the evening before his flight. Beth still can’t think about him without her hands balling into fists)." She has a meeting with a social worker who has come to check on her mental health, and she gets pissed and storms off, only realizing later than that that might have tipped them to the balance of thinking she's not a fit mother. She starts to think about the checklist they gave her and how to throw it so the social decide she's fit  enough, not too depressed, to take care of her kid. Next morning is the Mark’s testimony. Where she learns that there's one last secret between them after all, the mystery of the unaccounted for hour in which he drove around, and then wrote her a letter saying he was leaving her. "And then suddenly there is someone at her side. Ellie is there, dropping to her knees. Their faces are level and Beth has been brought so low she will take comfort anywhere, even here. She collapses against her old friend. ‘It’s not Mark,’ says Ellie. Her eyes shine with tears that reflect Beth’s own. ‘It’s Joe, doing this to us.’ 

“‘Mark was going to…’ Beth can’t get the rest of it out. She lets Ellie cry with her and it feels so good, for the first time in ages, to lean on someone the same size as her. They stay locked like that. After a few minutes, they stop crying, pull apart and look at each other. There’s a strange, almost post-coital awkwardness in the air; for all the intimacy of their embrace, they’re still essentially estranged, both unsure how heavily they can tread. 

“‘I’m so sorry about Tom,’ says Ellie. ‘He still doesn’t believe Joe did it.’ ‘Oh, God, no, I get it. Danny would’ve done the same.’ Saying his name changes the mood again; it brings them past embarrassment and into the hugeness of what has happened between them. Ellie meets Beth’s gaze head-on, still offering that unflinching apology and Beth understands, suddenly, that she will keep saying sorry for ever if that’s what it takes.”

[Oh god, she really would, wouldn’t she]

“Something inside her wants to draw back but there’s something stronger – a need to be understood, or perhaps the green shoots of forgiveness – that keeps her in the moment. ‘I didn’t know,’ she says. ‘About the letter.’ Ellie pulls a face. ‘I gathered that.’ Beth puts her chin on her knees and sighs deep. ‘You must want to beat the crap out of him.’ 

“‘I do, but it’s not just that.’ Beth hugs her knees tighter. ‘I’ve got this social worker on my back making me fill out this questionnaire to see if I’m going to top myself. As if I would, with Chloe and a new baby needing me. I’m like, don’t you think I’ve got enough shit to deal with without racing back from court to talk about my wellbeing?’ Ellie winces. Beth didn’t mean to throw a barb at her, but there’s no way around it. They can’t pussyfoot around this case, and if mentioning it hurts Ellie, well, that’s the way it’s got to be. Beth leans back against the cool wall of the stairwell. 

“‘If I’m not depressed already then that’ll just tip me over the edge,’ she mutters, more for her own benefit than Ellie’s. ‘Stupid cow with her stupid drawn-on eyebrows.’ ‘Patricia Kennedy?’ Ellie wiggles her own eyebrows, but nervously, like she’s afraid to acknowledge the joke. ‘I’ve come across her before. She’s all right. She’ll only be worried about you.’ ‘Yeah, well, I feel persecuted. And I worry that they’ll … do something. Take her away from me.’ It’s the first time she’s said it out loud. ‘Why would they do that?’ says Ellie. 

“‘Look at me,’ says Beth. ‘I can’t even look after myself.’ ‘Bollocks, you’re doing a brilliant job,’ says Ellie, in her old, no-nonsense way and it’s more reassuring than any platitude. Conversation grows louder in the atrium and the court doors start to swish open. Ellie gets to her feet. 

“‘I need to find Tom,’ says Ellie. Her teeth are clenched in a grim determination that Beth recognises from their old lives. Tom’s in for the bollocking of his life. Beth watches her straighten up, and only when she sees her at her full height does she realise Ellie’s been stooping since this all kicked off. Ellie puts out her right hand, and for a moment Beth thinks she’s offering a formal handshake and the indignation surges again. Then, as Ellie’s set face begins to wobble, she realises she’s offering to pull her up to standing. Beth hesitates for a second but finds she doesn’t have it in her to snub the offer. Ellie’s hand is cold in hers, but her grip is tight. I’ve got you, it seems to say. The raw intimacy of it is too much, and Beth drops her hand as soon as she’s on her feet. It’s exhausting: the smallest gesture is so loaded.”

[Oh I ache for you two.]

“ ‘Right, then,’ she says, testing her legs. They seem to be holding her up. ‘I’m going back in, see what else Mark’s got to say.’ ‘You sure you’re up to that?’ asks Ellie, tilting her head to one side. ‘No,’ says Beth. Their smiles are tentative, feelers in the dark. But they don’t hug. It feels too soon for that." oh you poor girls.

She gets back home after kicking mark to the curb, only to find the bloody social worker waiting for her. Only...

"‘Just give it to me, then,’ says Beth, sitting opposite Patricia. ‘Give me the bloody questionnaire.’ Patricia smiles softly. ‘All in good time. Look, I’m sorry if I was insensitive, barging in on your trial time. We’ll work around you from now on.’ Beth brightens. ‘You mean you’ll discharge me?’ 

“‘No,’ says Patricia. ‘I still want to keep an eye on you. Not because I think you’re going to harm Lizzie, but because you are vulnerable, even if you don’t want to admit it. But I won’t come and see you every day while the trial’s ongoing. What I’ll do is check in every few days, and give you my mobile number. If you feel you’re not coping, there are options. Don’t be stubborn.’ 

“‘I’m not stubborn.’ Patricia raises her magnificent eyebrows and Beth finds a genuine laugh. ‘How come you changed your mind, then?’ she asks. Patricia closes the file on her lap and looks Beth in the eye. 

“ ‘I had a call from a colleague who helped me see things from your perspective,’ she says. ‘Helen?’ ‘No,’ says Patricia. ‘Someone I worked with a while back.’ She starts to pack up her bag, putting her various sheaves of paperwork into compartments. On her way out of the door she turns and looks over your shoulder. ‘I won’t patronise you by pretending I understand what you’re going through,’ she says. ‘But you know, you’re not as alone as you think you are.’ Beth thinks she means because of Lizzie, and holds her tighter than ever. It’s only after Patricia has driven off that she realises who the old colleague was, and that she wasn’t talking about her daughter after all." And then, to conclude the chapter, "Without meaning to, she turns slowly in a half-circle to Ellie’s house. The light in the top bedroom is on and two figures move around inside. Tom is home. Jealousy swoops in, and Beth is too bitter to be happy for Ellie. That thought pulls her back to this afternoon at court, Ellie’s outstretched hand and how good it felt to take it. Beth fights the softening inside her. How can she accept friendship again? How can she trust? To survive the next twelve hours, the next few weeks, the rest of her life, she has to keep a force-field, like a shell, around herself and all her children. She turns her head away from Ellie’s house and looks up. The star that was shining so bright above her twinkles once, then disappears behind a cloud." Ugh, it's all so rough. I wanna wrap everybody in a soft blanket, Ellie, Beth, Alec, all the children, Maggie and Jocelyn, even mean Sharon and her poor kid. Wrap them up safe (and keep them out of the way while I off Joe Miller). . 3. The leaving of Claire Ripley- preseries, by a lot Takes place before claire and her husband meet. she's thirty or so, living with her grandma, more or less happy. In the town she was born in. Her friends are all getting married and having families-- she hasn't found the kind of man she wants to settle down with yet. She's looking for something more exciting than that. 

She ends up dating a fellow who's kind of a small-time ecstasy dealer, but as she is more more successful at her salon and gets promoted, it makes him feel insecure. 

One night he's selling more pills than normal, and she realizes that it's a cheap bad batch, gonna really hurt people, panics about how close she's been to the whole thing, ditches his pills, and runs away. For that, his family / employers put her grandma in the hospital. And tell her she has to leave town or else they'll do it again. 

She tells her Grandma she's leaving, and her grandma gives her that pendant, the pendant she had been saving for her birthday. Claire thinks to herself that she's going to love that pendant out of both punishment and hope, and maybe one day give it to daughter of her own. Someone who really deserves it [again, reinforcing that she did care about Pippa, as much as she was able to care about anyone]. 

She finds that there's a woman selling a hair salon in Mercia, and she has just enough to buy that out of her savings from working salon in town, so she does, and she runs. 

a week later she's on a plastic mattress, having forgotten to buy bedding, above the shop she now owns, bitterly ruing the day that she got in with the fella she got in with, and dreaming of a man she hasn't met yet. A strong man, an honest man, a man who works with his hands, a man muscular enough and sturdy enough to carry her upstairs throw her in bed and love her like she wants to be loved. Short, but kind of a wild ride. . 4. Thirteen hours- Alex Hardy- 17 July 2013 The day before Ellie gets back from vacation. (Or, comes back to work). The day before Danny is killed. Fuk. Hardy wakes at the traders, he's been there ten days. He takes his meds to settle his heart. "Hardy looks out over Broadchurch. Those huge cliffs everyone keeps telling him to go and look at glow amber in the distance; the sea is the same pale blue. He doesn’t like horizons. They make him feel agoraphobic, like nothing’s got edges, like everything could spill everywhere. “Now that the seagull’s gone, it’s too quiet. There is no noise apart from the chink and ting of breakfast things being laid out downstairs. You get the wrong kind of noise in the countryside. Hardy thrives on the white noise of the built environment, the comforting rumble of an A-road in the distance. He salivates at the thought of the hotel’s eggs Benedict but knows he should eat the wholegrain cereal in the dispenser, even though he’ll be charged the same price. What a waste, and a waste of police money, too. But that’s all to the good; it’s his own money he should be worrying about. Between the maintenance he pays Tess and Daisy and his other, secret expenses, he’s sliding into the red. Time now is measured in pounds and pennies as well as hours and days. “How much money he'll spend, how many nights he'll sleep in the traders..." It all depends on how quickly he can break Claire Ripley. This short story lays out the situation. Lays out his arrangement with Claire, it lays out the fact that he's doing this to punish himself and to solve the case and he doesn't feel like he can go home until he has done that. Much in the same way that, in the first collection of short stories, Ellie realized she couldn't go home to her actual house in Broadchurch without Tom, without Joe's case being done. The references to his physical state are just... He's drowning. It's so jarring after watching him halfway healthy at the end of series 2 finale. "Alec Hardy's heart skips a beat it can't afford to miss." "He's maybe half a mile from Claire's house, but the walk would ruin him for the rest of the day, and he needs the driver to get them back to Broadchurch." Something strange happened with Claire's phone, and now he's late to his shift, risking the only thing he has left, his career. "Someone behind them sounds their horn... Jolting him from anxiety into panic, and he has one of those micro crisis that happens two or three times a day now. He hasn't got time for this. What the hell is he doing? he was so sure this setup was the only way to save his sanity, but he now realizes it's just as likely to destroy it. it has put his career on the line again, and God knows his career is all he has left, now." Turns out, not that she admits to it but he puts together the pieces from observing, that Claire had herself a little tantrum and threw her phone and broke it. He's a little bit pleased by this, because it's the opportunity he needs to be able to get her a phone that he's paying for that he can monitor, under the guise of it being safer and more secure. he talks about the fact that she is suspicious, and he knows she's holding something back, that she is never the same person twice when he comes by, vacillating between very young, innocent, flirty, pouty, angry, blank.... He told her he'll be back by lunchtime with a new phone for her. " 'I've got to go, I do have another job apart from you.' “Claire nods, and Hardy wonders if she realizes just how loaded that statement is. Does she realize that she has the power to land him in the shit? Does she know what a huge transgression he has made? what he's doing is not a secret you could dump on anyone, not even your most trusted colleague. And D I Alec Hardy has no mates in Broadchurch nick." Then he heads back to the office. (there is a newspaper clipping up in the kitchen at the office, the headline is something like "copper run's 10K for charity", and it's Ellie dressed as a Bee doing a 10km fun run. just FYI. This is a thing that happened.)

Basically the whole story is just one shit-ass day in Hardy's life. His prescription runs out and he has to get a renewal, and ends up having to go pretty far abroad to get that renewal, Claire leaves the house to go get a phone herself and he catches wind when he goes to buy her a new phone and the guy mentions that someone have been there trying to do the same thing. Basically it just involves him traveling the city, fielding phone calls from one of the other detectives about some boys who stole some charity shop tins. He ends up successfully solving the case, nearly dying because of missing his medication, and ends the story worried that his boss is on to him already, that Claire will not behave right, and that today heralds Bad Things for his time in Broadchurch. 

But he convinces himself today is just a blip, tomorrow they will charge some hoodlums with stealing Charity money from shops, and nothing more dramatic could possibly happen unless things get real violent at the egg and spoon race at field day at the school. He's exhausted, but he knows everything else to be done can be put off till tomorrow. Tomorrow will be better.. Oh you poor bastard.

.

That’s all, and I think that’s the last of the broadchurch-associated Official Publications.

(But also I’m high-key tempted to accquire the three-season box set and scour the cast interviews and commentaries and deleted scenes for additional stuff. because I have no chill over these people, apparently)

[rosezure]

Captured Pt.2

Anon requested:  I would like to request a one-shot where the reader newly joins the avengers post AOU under the alias of Tigress and has the same skill sets as Natasha. Her and Steve are teamed up and they don’t get along at all. They argue all the time about how something should be done. The whole team easily likes her. She and Steve get sent on a mission where they have to be a married couple (alias of Chris Evans and Sonia Evans). In a dangerous situation they realize they love each other. (“you” POV pls)

I wasn’t sure what you meant by a “you” kind of POV so I hope I didn’t mess up or something. Also, I got so carried away with the story I thought it got to long and divided it into two parts. Enjoy!

Summary: You’re the Avengers’ newest member and you all get along splendidly. Except for a certain blonde haired Captain. Steve Rogers, a.k.a Captain America, seems to hate you. But does he?

Warnings: Language, torture, violence, blood and gore in general, mentions of death perhaps.

(Y/N) Your name

(Y/N/N) Your nickname

(Y/L/N) Your last name

(h/c) Hair color

(e/c) Eye color

(f/c) Favorite color

______________________________________________________________

“We’ll be landing shortly. Maybe you should change.” Steve surprised you from behind as you read the magazine in your hands. You turned around, checking him out slightly. He had already changed into a navy blue suit and a white shirt.

“I guess I should.” You replied before standing up and reaching for your suitcase. You took it with you to the - surprisingly - roomy bathroom on the plane and took a quick shower, changed into your dress and put on some makeup. You were almost done with your (h/c) hair when Steve knocked on the door, telling you that you would be landing in half an hour.

You walked out, smoothing your (f/c) dress that reached your feet. Steve froze, his jaw slacking at the sight of you. The dress was quite simple with only a bit of shimmer in strategic places, accentuating your features and hugging your body in all the right places. You sheepishly walked up to him and turned around.

“Zip me up, would ya?” You asked, not needing to put your hair to the side since it was in an intricate bun. Steve gulped and tugged the zipper of the dress with shaking hands. Once he reached the top of your neck, he gently caressed the skin with his fingers, causing goosebumps to appear on your skin. You turned around slow, noticing the short distance between the both of you.

“Thank you.” You whispered, your breath fanning over his lips. You walked by him before you could see his reaction and took your seat once again, preparing for the landing. Steve rubbed the back of his neck and sat down. The jet landed and you both stood up. The door opened and Steve took your suitcase and his.

“Let’s go over this one more time: I’m Chris and you’re Sonia Evans. We’ve been married for two months now, having met in London about three years ago. Remember what Nat said about the honeymoon phase, but don’t over do it. Our plan is for you to participate in the auction while I search the facility for the intel we need. Got it?” He listed off as he checked you both had everything.

“Got it. And don’t worry, I won’t make you too uncomfortable.” You winked before stepping out of the plane, descending the stairs gracefully. As expected, the host had sent a limo to take you to where the event would be taking place.

Steve handed the driver your suitcases and opened the door for you. You smiled gratefully and slipped in, careful not to step on your dress. He went in and sat next to you, giving you a curt nod before taking your hand in his. For some reason, the action made your heart flutter.

You made it to the venue in complete silence, both preparing for the act you would be putting up. Steve was the first out and he held his hand out to you. You grasped it and slipped out of the car, smiling at him.

“Thank you, darling.” You told him, using a British accent before pecking his cheek. He was not expecting it but was able to mask his surprise with a love struck smile. You were impressed. It almost looked real!

“This way, Mr. and Mrs. Evans.” A waiter motioned for you to follow him. The gala was being held in the terrain about three miles west of the facility. A sort of tent had been put up in case the weather changed, but the sky was clear of clouds and tinted orange by the setting sun. It was a beautiful view. Fairy lights littered the tables and decorations, giving a mystical glow to the environment. If the circumstances were different, you would be tempted to say it was a romantic evening.

“Ah, Mr. Evans. So nice of you to join us. I heard you were thinking of participating in the auction.” A man in an expensive looking suit walked up to you. He shook hands with Steve, who was smiling widely.

“You heard right. I was thinking of expanding my corporation to Berlin and this place has potential.” He replied, his voice steady and confident. You were slightly shocked at how easily the lie had come to him. He was usually really bad at lying.

“Well then, I wish you the best of luck.” Steve thanked the man. “And who is this beauty.” The man turned to you. You smiled as you walked closer to Steve, wrapping your arms around his waist.

“Such kind words, sir.” You answered, making your voice huskier. The man licked his lips, looking you up and down. On the inside, you wanted to roll your eyes and punch him, but you had a cover to maintain.

“This, Mr. Peters, is my gorgeous wife, Sonia.” Steve said, tightening his grip around your waist and pulling you closer to him. You placed a hand on his chest and gave him a loving look. You hummed in content.

“I will never get used to you calling me that, love.” You winked, placing a lingering kiss to his jaw line. He pecked your nose and smirked.

“Ah, young love.” The man chuckled. “Enjoy your night, Mr. Evans. If you need me I shall be with Mr. Quinn at the front tables.” He excused himself and walked away.

“You were pretty convincing.” Steve whispered in your ear once the man had left. You pretended to laugh at something he said and threw your arms around his neck, leaning closer.

“So were you, Rogers. Not bad for someone who could barely lie when we met.” You smirked. A slow song began playing. Steve took you by the hand to the makeshift dance floor and began swaying with you to the sound of La Vie en Rose.

You kept dancing until the song ended. The plan was then put in action. You were to say your husband received a very urgent and important call and had left. You, however, had gracefully agreed to participate in the auction in his place. You took your place and the numbered sign.

Steve left the venue and walked to where the limos had been parked. He discreetly checked if the drivers were anywhere in sight. It appeared they were all at the bar, laughing and talking so he quickly made his way to the limo that had brought you two here and took out his suitcase. He changed behind a bush, all the while cursing for not thinking about something else.

Soon, he had reached the facility and was making his way inside. If on the outside it looked like an abandoned factory, on the inside it was almost the same. It appeared to be recently shut down. The machines were free of dust and some were even still warm. He continued looking around, hoping to find some sort of control room.

When he did find it, he broke the lock with a kick and lifted his shield for protection as he walked in. It was empty except for the computers and many archive cabinets. He plugged the hard drive Nat had given him before he left to the main computer and began manually searching through the files for anything related to the Winter Soldier.

While Steve was searching for the intel, you were facing bigger problems.

“Come on, sweetheart. Your husband abandoned you here. Come with me.” Mr. Peters was persistent, you’d give him that. But this unwanted attention was annoying you, to the point where you were considering jeopardizing the mission just to have a go at this bastard.

“Look here, you fucker. Leave me the fuck alone or I will break your fucking neck. I have had enough of your horrible flirting, now get away from me.” You threatened in a low voice, slowly backing away. The man frowned.

“What happened to your accent?” He asked. You felt the blood drain from your face. You had slipped. You had been caught. The man noticed your reaction and widened his eyes.

“You’re that avenger. Tigress. And Mr. Evans must be Captain America.” He concluded before grabbing your arm and forcefully dragging you with him. You pried your arm from his death-like grip and began running the opposite direction.

“Stop that woman! She’s an avenger!” You heard he man yell before something hit you and your world turned black.

What seemed like moments later, you were being woken up by a bucket of cold water being thrown at you. You gasped and spluttered, feeling pain shoot through your wrists. You were chained to the ceiling, your bare feet dangling beneath you. They had torn off your dress, leaving you in your underwear only.

Mr. Peters walked into the cell you were being held in, carrying a tray with syringes and knives.

“You won’t get any information out of me with that.” You spat, a mix of anger and fear boiling in your blood. Mr. Peters smirked.

“Oh, I know. But I can still hurt you. You bleed, don’t you?” He asked with a sinister laugh. You felt your breath hitch when he took one of the knives and pressed the blade to your collar bone. Without warning, he began carving a pattern onto your flesh, causing you to yell in pain. He chuckled and stood back to admire his work.  

The bloodied knife was replaced by a syringe containing a greasy yellow substance. The man stabbed your right thigh with the needle, injecting you with the strange liquid. You felt your muscles tingle for a few seconds before everything started burning. You cried out once again, clenching your fists and squeezing your eyes shut.

Steve would come for you.

You kept repeating that thought over and over again in your head as more strange substances were injected into you and more fresh wounds appeared on your skin. Next came the beating. The henchmen took turns punching you.

“Is that- Is that all you’ve got?” You croaked out, spitting blood on the man’s face. His smirk faltered and he plunged one of his knives in your stomach. You cried out.

“We will brake you eventually, Tigress. And when we do, you will be happy to comply.” He whispered in your ear before pulling the knife out violently. You gasped at the pain and panted.

“I will never comply.” You managed to choke out between heavy breaths.

“Oh, I’m sure you’ll change your mind.” His sinister laugh was the last thing you heard before darkness engulfed you once again.

Meanwhile, Steve had found the intel he needed and was making his way back to the venue. That is, until your distress signal was activated. He furrowed his eyebrows. What could’ve gone wrong? He was horrified when he noticed your signal was coming from within the abandoned Hydra base.

Steve walked back to the base, not caring if he was spotted now. You were in danger and he needed to help you. He stormed the building, which was now guarded by agents of all sizes. He took them down easily, blinded by the rage pulsing through his veins.

He had to get to you. He had to save you.

Soon, he reached the basement of the facility. Your signal was only a few feet away now, just behind the steel double doors in front of him. Furious, Steve kicked them open and threw his shield at the closest guard with so much force it bounced off the body and knocked over the remaining one. Steve retrieved it and stood face to face with a man wearing a blood splattered suit.

Steve looked from the man to your lifeless body that was hanging behind him. That was when he saw red. Steve dropped his shield and charged at the man, fists flying in his direction. He pushed the man into the opposing wall and gave one single punch that was enough to crack the man’s jaw and render him unconscious.

He let go of the man and worked swiftly to free you from your chains. He held your limp body in his arms and grabbed his shield on the way out. He called the team to pick you up all the while never letting you go.

Natasha arrived with a quinjet in under two hours and helped Steve take you inside.

“Please, stay with me, (Y/N). Please. Don’t die on me, not now.” Steve repeated over and over gain, holding your hand in his as you flew back to the base. As soon as the quijet landed, Steve ran with you in his arms to the medical ward.

Thankfully, your wounds weren’t as deep as they seemed and the doctors managed to pump out whatever substances were used to torture you. Steve felt relieved that you were going to be okay, but he refused to leave your bedside.

“I have to be here when she wakes up. I owe it to her.” He had answered when Nat told him to shower, eat and get some rest.

You were unconscious for five days. And for five days you dreamt of Hydra, the tortures you went through, but above all, you dreamt about Steve. About his blue eyes. About the way he infuriated you. About the way you felt around him, the giddiness and nervousness, which you masked with anger and rude remarks.

You were slowly coming back to consciousness when you felt a familiar warmth in your left hand. It was comforting, but whoever it was, they were squeezing your hand too tightly at the moment. Slowly, you blinked your eyes open.

“Can you let go of my hand, please?” You croaked out, your voice hoarse from not being used.

Steve head shot up and he instantly let go of your hand, apologizing repeatedly. You smirked at him, your eyes still half open. He smiled softly at you, tucking a loose strand behind your ear. Then he sighed and looked down.

“It’s my fault you’re hurt. I want to apologize for putting you at risk.” He used his Captain voice, looking back up. You rolled your eyes.

“Always so dramatic.” You teased, your smirk widening. Steve narrowed his eyes playfully.

“I haven’t been honest with you. This was a personal mission, only Sam and Nat know about the true nature of this-” He started but you cut him off.

“Steve, if you don’t want to tell me it’s fine. We’re all entitled to some secrets. It’s called privacy.” You assure him, reaching your hand out for him to take. He gingerly accepts it and kisses your knuckles, making your heart melt.

“I am so sorry, (Y/N)” He apologized again. You laugh softly, trying not to hurt your ribs. He pull his hand with whatever strength you have and take hold of his collar.

“Come here, you asshole.” You smirk before crashing your lips to his. He kissed back, careful not to hurt you. You pull back at the same time and stare into each other’s eyes.

“I love you, Steve. I’m sorry I didn’t show it before now.” You apologize, biting your still tingling lips. Steve smiled lovingly at you.

“I love you, too, (Y/N).” He says before kissing you once again.

A/N: AND VOILA! The end! Hope you liked it and thanks for all the support, you guys are AWESOME!

[nyangibun]

Thunderblink Post-7x07 Drabble

Summary: John’s POV during the two hugs. 

John didn’t have to use his powers. He could sense it. Death lingered in the corners of this abandoned house and he tried to stop her from going in, to spare her the pain of what she would find, but true to her nature, Clarice went bounding in without a second’s hesitation. It was what drew him to her in the first place. Hardened as she was, there was unfailing loyalty there, the kind that went beyond self-preservation, that was a little reckless and a little inexplicable. But John called out for her nonetheless, trying and failing to stop her. 

Following her inside the house, John made his way towards the back room to the kitchen and his stomach rolled at the sight. Blood smeared the ground like a second coat of paint and there were bullets holes on the door. He could guess what had happened here and it made his blood boil.

He turned to her as she entered the room. “Clarice, I’m sorry.” 

Watching as her face contorted in pain, the tears pooling in her eyes and falling down her pallid skin, it broke something in him. He reached out to her and pulled her into his chest, holding her to him as if he could shield her from this moment, but this was something he couldn’t protect anyone from. This was the reality of their lives. This was the cost of being a mutant. John held her just the same; it was all he could do right now.

Her sobs grew in volume and she tried to push back, but it was half-hearted at best and John wasn’t willing to let her go right now. He thought of the people here, the ones who had raised Clarice the best way they knew how, and all the children that had lived here when the Sentinels arrived. He thought about the pain shuddering through her body and John’s anger grew. He never deluded himself into thinking he could save every mutant he ever met; he knew he would always lose more than he could save. Being in the marines meant he knew firsthand what war did to people and he’d lost enough brothers out there to be nearly acclimated to such losses, but John wanted to save her. He wanted to protect her from all of this – the pain, the heartbreak. He wanted to hold her until none of this mattered anymore.

And if John couldn’t do that, he wanted to hurt them, make them pay for what they did here and how much they’d hurt Clarice. John gritted his teeth and tried to quell the anger building up inside of him. He couldn’t let his emotions get the better of him, not when she was still in his arms. The last thing John wanted was to be the one to hurt her... again. 

Clarice pulled back, this time more forcefully and he let her go. Her nose was red, eyes puffy and swollen, but she wiped away the tears with the back of her hand. The defiance he now knew so well back in her eyes. Without so much as another word, Clarice pushed open the door and walked out. The sunlight streamed in and turned the crimson on the linoleum tiles to a bright red. It made his stomach turn. 

John followed her out a few minutes later after trying to discern what had happened here. He didn’t want to tell her, but he couldn’t lie to her. John never wanted to lie to her again. The last time he did, he very nearly lost her (actually he did and he wasn’t about to do it again).

“I’m sorry,” he murmured, pulling her in again. John felt her arms unwind from around herself and wrap around his torso. He held her as tightly as he could without hurting her and cradled her head with one hand, trying to let her know without words that he was here for her. No matter what he said about only coming because of the Underground, he was also here because he needed Clarice to know there were people in her corner, that he was in her corner. 

“You know what I said earlier about this not being my fight? I don’t know if it was before but it sure as hell is now.”

John watched her walk away. The conviction in her voice made his heart ache. This was not what he wanted, not like this. 

“Clarice, wait.”  

She stopped but didn’t turn.

“I’ll do whatever I can to help you find justice for what happened here,” he told her carefully. “But this isn’t how I wanted you to come back and if you need time... to... if you need time, I’ll understand.” 

Clarice turned and her face softened slightly as she stepped forward. “The faster I come back, the faster I can make those bastards pay for what they did and find the kids they took.” She tilted her head. “This is what you wanted, isn’t it? Me back fighting the good fight?” 

He touched her shoulder and implored her to hear his words. “Not like this." 

She shook her head and began to back away. “Well, you got what you wished for. Let’s go.” 

She still didn’t trust him. It was a realisation that admittedly hurt him. He should’ve expected it though. After what Sonia did to her and how he’d been complicit in it, what reason had John given her to trust him? Clarice wasn’t going back for him; she was going back for her foster family. It was a good reason as any, but it didn’t make his life any less complicated. There were things there between them, real on his end but on hers? He couldn’t be sure. 

John sighed, rubbing a hand over his face, and followed her towards the main road. At least she’d be coming back. At least then he could keep his eye out for her and protect her as well as he could. That was a consolation he’d have to accept for now. 

[themutantunderground]

A bit of John’s POV from the end of sS1E3...

John knows something is wrong the moment he sees that portal. It shouldn’t be there. Clarice isn’t at that level yet, not with her warm jelly donut sense of focus. Out beside the portal, he sees a flash of autumn leaf red, Dreamer’s hair, and his gut twists even more because that means she’s there and Clarice is there at the same time and Sonia has a bad habit of doing drastic things---

He knows something’s up, something isn’t right, but he can’t think about that now. He’s busy driving, busy getting shot at, and while he can’t really get hurt by a few bullets (he’ll bruise a little, maybe), everyone else in the SUV can. One stray bullet, and it’s going to be Marcos or the kids or Caitlin bleeding out in this ratty old car, so he takes a chance on the portal that shouldn’t be in the middle of the road.

The SUV skids to safety, and he gets out, leaving the Struckers to Marcos as he goes to find out exactly what’s going on.

Both Clarice and Sonia are running toward him, but Clarice is out in front and there’s something new and unfamiliar in her bright eyes. It’s a warmth that he could have sworn he saw a glimpse of earlier, but now it’s full-blown and it shouldn’t be there, not like that. Just like that portal.

He’s starting to understand as the adrenaline dies down, now that he isn’t worried about people dying. But he can’t stop himself from opening his arms to her as she races up to him and leaps at him, knowing he’ll catch her when before she would have been skittish, uncertain. That trust unsettles him because it’s so unlike her.

Part of him wants this. He would be lying if he tried to say he didn’t, but not this way. Never like this. Because as Clarice hugs him, arms tight around him like she was afraid of losing him, he can smell Dreamer’s memory smoke lingering in her hair, beneath the honey scent of the shampoo Clarice used. He holds her too, lost for a split second in a could-have-been, is-this-real, a half-formed I-wish, but even as he holds her, realization is rushing in. He runs his hand in a circle against her back.

This isn’t Clarice. This is Dreamer.

This is Dreamer looking at him with Clarice’s eyes.

He doesn’t know what to say as she looks at him with excitement and trust and that thing he doesn’t want to name. He doesn’t want to break her and he doesn’t know what to do, so he lets her go inside without telling her.

And then there’s Sonia. Sonia with an excuse and a reason, but he told her not to do this. Not to Clarice. Not when Dreamer knew that this kind of thing could mess a person up.

He lets Dreamer leave too because honestly he doesn’t want to talk to her anymore right now. He’s grateful that he’s not dead, but he doesn’t agree with what she did.

This is a mess.

John takes a deep breath, focusing on the smell of the Georgia pines and the last bit of summer in the air. He tries to calm himself, but all he can think of is the way Clarice looked at him so he follows the others inside.

This isn’t how he wanted this to happen.

But things never worked out the way he wanted them to, so why should this have been any different?