#their own powers scare her because they don't really have proper control over them yet

[thefourfan]

Made some doodles of Aster (my Happymark shipkid) on this board today ^_^

Individual doodles under the keep reading :3

Whiteboard joinnn haihaiahi :333

[symptoms-syndrome]

UGH and now there's fucking DRAMA with birth parents!!!

My birth dad is taking my birth mom to court AGAIN. It's like his favorite activity. He just takes her to court on baseless bullshit because he has a lot of money and she doesn't.

Apparently this time it's about my little sister's college stuff. He's saying he needs total control over her college decision and that birth mom has to pay for it. What the fuck ever.

My like. Perspective on both of them has definitely changed as I've gotten older. I feel...pity, for my birth mom. She's a very, very mentally ill woman who had one kid by accident and one in an attempt to save her failing marriage. She wasn't ready to have kids and wasn't able to take care of them. She's been dealing with my birth dad, which got worse after he divorced her, and is too proud to accept help financially, medically, socially.

My birth dad...is a bad person. I hesitate to call people "bad people" but I'm obviously biased here. He's manipulative, self centered, and needs to feel important and powerful and admired above everything else. Everything he does is solely for his own gain. He doesn't care about anyone else except as stepping stones to greater and greater things. He's told me so himself, he told me to think of people like that. To him, it's a dog eat dog world and he needs to be seven steps ahead. I see some of the worst parts of myself in him. He takes advantage of my birth mom despite her being less powerful, less wealthy, and less capable than him. Maybe because of it. He needs total and ultimate control over his children because his children are part of his image. That's another thing that's straight from the horse's mouth. Every time there was some minor infraction, that was the scolding. "The way you behave and present yourself reflects on me. You need to act proper or people will think I'm a bad father."

That's the only reason he keeps trying to be nice to me, I think. It looks bad on him to have an estranged kid. He keeps trying to get me back. But I wonder why he hasn't given up on me. Just erased me from his perfect existence. One time he told me a father's job is to "keep his daughter off the pole." Now I'm like. Doing drag that involves stripping. So. I'm not sure how much he knows about that though.

Individual parts (big or little p, not sure, probably both) have varied feelings. Some are scared of him. A lot of them are, I think. Some are neutral. There's also the opinion that I should keep some sort of loose connection. Which is where I am now. There's the very strong but not very popular opinion I need to cut him off entirely. But that's counteracted by the fear. Lots of fear. But there are still parts that desperately, desperately need his love, approval, affection.

IDK. I have a lot of "daddy issues" TBH. Freud would love me.

There's also the issue of. My little sister. She's still... IDK. I can't blame her for anything. She's in a really traumatic and scary situation. I cut my birth dad off (though I don't remember it) around 15. She hasn't done that yet and she's 18. She's scared to. Part of me feels angry at her. She doesn't have the courage to do what I did. But I can understand. She's scared to be on her own without support. She wants him to help pay for her college. All this sort of stuff. But I'm like... you're an adult now, legally. You don't need to do anything he asks of you. You don't even need to live with him anymore if you don't want to. But she's just... IDK. Compliant. I was too. It's like he makes you into a robot that needs to follow orders. He frames it in a way that makes it feel like if you don't do what he tells you to you'll doom yourself to a shit existence. Which I guess. IDK I fell into the doomed shit existence. Things probably would have been easier, in every way except mentally, if I had been compliant. But I didn't make that choice. I couldn't be compliant so I was thrown away. And now he thinks he can fix me, I think. He regrets throwing me away.

I can't blame her for her decisions, or lack thereof. But it does make me angry. I want her to have the courage to stand up for herself. She's so trained by him she can't even tell me what she wants or doesn't want to do. She can't make any sort of decision without three hours of reassuring her that it's her choice and I won't be upset with whatever she chooses. And sometimes that doesn't even work. I can understand it but that doesn't make it less frustrating. Less infuriating. I don't understand even though I do. Just do it!!! Just have the courage and make even the smallest choice to distance yourself!!! What is she going to do when she's living by herself, or in college? If I were to be mean, I'd say it's pathetic. She's pathetic. I can only hope that she toughens up.

[windless-hurricane]

She's the One

Chapter 2: Your Name

A Billy x Reader x Steve Fanfic

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SUMMARY: You're One, one of the many kids experimented on in Hawkins lab. Eleven's sister. You were found and now you're here to stay.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: This took a lot longer to write than I anticipated, but here it is! I'd also like to apologize to anyone who sent me an ask. I accidentally responded and now I can't find y'all. If you're still interested, just let me know in the comments. Thank you.

WARNINGS: Language, violence, and scenes involving blood and/or death.

WORD COUNT: 2.8k

TAGLIST: @cherrym4rk @torntaltos @bun-dpdbny @5sosxgrethan @acidrain707 @evelynfreakinaddams @qtmeryr @kayln97 @uwu-bucky @book--butterfly @laurmillen @art-flirt @thecornerstoreoftheuniverse

LAST CHAPTER

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“What can you do?”

“How old are you?”

“Are you Eleven’s sister?”

“Just how strong are you?”

“Can you show us?”

The kids continued to throw question after question at you, expecting them to be answered, but leaving you with no time to answer them. You just stared at them with wide eyes until Hopper cut them off with a harsh tone.

“I’ll be asking the questions here.” And silence befell on them once again. Wow, you thought. He really had a talent for getting people to shut up.

You looked to him and he reeked of frustration and worry. However, when he spoke, there was an ounce of sympathy in his voice. “Why were you in that chamber?” You knew he was going to ask that. It was obvious enough, but it still made you cringe with discomfort. You didn’t want to talk about that chamber, because for you, that thing was a personal hell you thought you would never escape from. It was frightening and you never wanted to go back. However, answers were something that they deserved. Not only would it have helped them through this crisis, it would also give them some trust in you.

So, you cleared your throat and began to speak, slowly but carefully. “Well...since you know Eleven...you must already know...what the lab did…to her...to us.” He nodded. “I was the first one...they did it to… They always said that…they got lucky with me. That I was their best experiment and...would lay the groundwork for the others after me. That's why...all the kids who did survive the experiments, got one or two of my abilities.”

“And what exactly are your abilities,” Dustin asked with a grin, but Hopper wasn’t amused. He shot Dustin a death glare, but he didn't seem to notice it.

“I-I can move things...with my mind,” you revealed. “And make people see what I want them to see… I can read minds too and...tell what people are feeling.”

“Can you control people?”

“No. I haven't been able to that...not yet at least.” You caught a glimpse of Hopper's annoyed expression and gulped nervously. “Anyway... The reason I was in that chamber in the first place is because...I helped the other kids escape. Three, Seven, and Eight.”

“You mean there's other kids out there right now,” he asked.

“Well, not ‘here’ here, but...around. That day...I wasn't able to get Eleven out, but luckily...she was able to get out on her own.”

“While I was in there though, I could hear things - voices. At first, I-I didn't know who they belonged to, but I slowly started to realize what was going on. The first voice I heard was from that woman, Joyce...and she was talking...about him.” You pointed to Will who was asleep on the couch with a blanket over him. “He went missing and you found him, but now...something's wrong with him.”

“You know what's wrong?”

You nodded, while never breaking eye contact with him. “I know everything...because...I heard everything. I know all of you too. I recognize you from your voices.”

At that, everyone glanced between each other in astonishment. You, you were someone that they just met, someone who had just entered the picture without warning. Yet, you seemed to know more about what was going on than they did. Hell, you even knew all of them without a proper introduction. So if that didn’t show a fraction of what you were capable of, then they didn’t know what could. You were someone worth the bargain. Even so, Hopper felt compelled to ask one last thing.

“How long were you in there?”

You shrugged, “5 years, give or take.”

“Shit,” one of the kids breathed out and you could make it out as Lucas. Hopper sighed deeply and you could tell it was from a mixture of sympathy and desperation.

“I'm sorry to ask this of you, but...we need your help.”

“And I'll give it,” you blurted out without hesitation. “I was going to give it regardless.” You said more quietly as you looked over to Will. “There’s a darkness in Hawkins that we need to stop...and it starts with him.”

__________________________________________

“Okay, so if this thing is like a brain that’s controlling everything, then if we kill it...we kill everything that it controls.” You nodded as you continued to stare at the page from Dustin’s D&D manual. Mike’s deduction made sense, but the same question still stood. How do you-

“How do you kill this thing? Shoot it with fireballs or something?”

You jumped in surprise as Hopper snatched the manual away, trying to find the answer for himself. Dustin eventually spoke up, but it was less than confident.

“Well, uh, you summon an undead army, um, because-because zombies, you know, they don’t have brains.” He began to stumble over his own words. “And the mind flayer, it-it… It likes brains. It’s just a game. It’s a game,” he finally confessed.

“What the hell are we doing here,” Hopper groaned. Things weren’t looking good and that became more evident as Hopper and Dustin started to argue.

“I thought we were waiting for your military backup.”

“We are!”

“How are they gonna stop this? You can't just shoot this with guns.”

“You don't know that! We don't know anything!”

“We know it's already killed everybody in that lab. We know the monsters are gonna molt again. We know that it's only a matter of time before those tunnels reach this town.”

“They’re right,” a voice interrupted. Joyce. “We have to kill it.”

Your face softened as you turned to face her. She was being overwhelmed by grief, sadness, and anger, but who could blame her obviously. She lost someone she loved.

“I want to kill it,” she declared.

“Me too, Joyce. Me too.” Hopper was doing his best to calm her; but deep down, he couldn’t even do that for himself. “But how do we do that?” And it hit you.

“Will knows.” Everyone stopped and turned to you. “Will knows how to kill it, because he’s connected to it. He already knows everything about it and that includes its weaknesses.”

“I thought we couldn’t trust him anymore - that he’s a spy for the mind flayer now,” Max reminded, causing Mike to shake his head.

“Yeah, but he can't spy if he doesn't know where he is.”

“Exactly,” you confirmed. “This will work.”

__________________________________________

You all decided that the shed in the backyard would be the best place for Will’s interrogation. It was small, making it perfect to disguise in a short amount of time. So, you all went outside to find materials that could help in your endeavor.

You were encouraged to not use your powers until the real threat came and while that wasn't a terrible idea, you also hadn’t used your powers in five years. You were rusty and needed as much practice as you could get. So, whenever the kids came upon an object that was either too heavy to carry or too high on a shelf to reach, you helped them. It was enough for now.

You let out a small sigh as you wiped the blood dripping from your nose. “You okay,” you heard someone ask and you turned to find Hopper. You nodded.

“Ye-yeah, I’m okay. Thank you.” You moved to go back into the house since most of the preparations were finished already, but stopped once he spoke again.

“I’m sorry again that all of this was so sudden and that...we weren’t able to save you under more normal circumstances.”

“Oh… That-that’s okay,” you told him. “I’m just glad that...that you got me out...and honestly, this couldn’t have been a more perfect time. You need my help to stop this thing. So… I guess what I’m really trying to say is...thank you. Thank you for saving me.” You managed a small smile as you looked up at him and he simply nodded in response. However, the tiniest of smiles reached his lips as well.

“I know you said you already know me, but I think...you at least deserve something more proper than this,” he reached his hand out. “Jim Hopper.”

You gazed down at his hand for a bit before taking it like you thought you were supposed to. You tried to match his grip as you smiled wider, “One.”

__________________________________________

You sat in the kitchen, hugging your knees to your chest. It was the first time you were left alone since being freed and now, you couldn’t ignore all the emotions floating around you. Anger, fear, regret, guilt, sadness, pain. To make it worse, you could hear every sad thing being said in the shed. It didn’t matter if you weren’t there. You could still hear everything like you always did.

Do you know what March 22nd is? It's your birthday. Your birthday.

Do you remember the day Dad left? We stayed up all night building Castle Byers… just the way you drew it.

I just felt so alone and scared, but… I saw you alone on the swings and you were alone too.

Tears ran down your cheeks and you couldn’t tell if they were for them, yourself and the life you could’ve had, or both. It was all becoming too much to bear and you couldn’t help the tears that kept falling and the sniffles that started to leave you. It wasn’t until you heard someone walk in that you tried to contain yourself. You tried to get rid of the tears with the sleeves of your shirt, but it seems like you didn’t try hard enough.

“Hey… Hey, are you crying?” And you froze. No one had ever spoken to you like that before. No one had ever used a voice that was so genuine and calming that it was enough to make your tears stop. That voice provided instant relief and you didn’t know why. You looked up to the owner of that voice and it was none other than Steve with a face of worry plastered on him.

You gazed into his eyes for a bit before answering. They were brown, just like most of the world’s, yet they still managed to be different. They still managed to be incredibly warm and beautiful. It was quite soothing. You gulped softly before averting your gaze.

“No,” you uttered, but of course he wasn’t convinced.

“Then, what’s all this,” he asked, gesturing toward your glossy eyes and red nose.

“Um, I- It just comes with the power.” You smiled softly in an attempt to make him believe you.

“Oh, so a bad case of allergies comes with your powers?” You looked at him in astonishment before bursting out in laughter, something you didn’t even know you were capable of.

“What? No.”

“Well, that’s what you said,” he began to laugh as well as he grinned a smile that could’ve made your heart stop.

“That’s not what I meant,” you tried to explain. “It’s just that...with my power...I can feel the emotions of everyone around me, but it’s not something I can really turn off. So sometimes... it can be very overwhelming...like right now.”

“Yeah, it really isn’t the best time, huh?” You shook your head, causing him to hum in response. “What if you just focused on one person?” Your eyes widened.

“Huh?”

“What do you feel when you feel me?” His eyes widened too. “Wait, that sounds weird.” You let out a small chuckle as he started to panic. “I mean, what do you feel when...um-what do you feel when you see me?”

You tilted your head to the side as you felt him. Not physically, but just through the way you gazed at him.

“Worry and...nervousness,” you confirmed. “You’re a lot more tame than everyone else here.”

“Well, that’s a good thing, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, it is,” you chuckled, and you didn’t notice the way his eyes scanned over your features or the way he smirked after.

“So, your name’s One, huh? Like the number?” You furrowed your eyebrows.

“Yes.”

“But it’s not your actual name.” You shook your head, only confirming his thoughts.

“No. I don’t remember what my actual name was. One was just the name they gave me. We were never...people to them. We were just numbers...experiments.”

“That’s really messed up. I’m sorry.” You shook your head again.

“It-it’s okay.” However, he could still tell from you expression that it wasn’t.

“How about...we give you a new name? A real name?”

For some reason, your heart flutter at his suggestion and a warmth flushed your cheeks.

“Um, I think-I think I’d like that,” you told him and his eyes gleamed.

“Ok, names names. What do you look like?” He brought his hand to his chin and pondered for a bit. “How about… Stacy?” You grimaced without meaning to and he took that as a no. “Alright... Oh! Heather.” You shook your head. “Really?”

“Really,” you responded.

“Ok, ok. How about… Let me think. (Y/N). That’s a nice name.”

(Y/N). It was simple and different all at once, and the way it rolled it off his tongue made you like it even more.

“I think that’s it,” you smirked and he mimicked you right away.

“Well, (Y/N). I’m Steve Harrington.” He stuck his hand out and you took it gently. His hand was a lot bigger than yours in comparison, but a lot softer. It was warm and careful, like he was afraid he would crush your hand if he squeezed a bit too tightly. It was sweet.

“Well, Steve Harrington. I’m…(Y/N).”

“Nice to meet you.” You both giggled softly until you were cut off by Mike yelling ‘We got something!’

“Duty calls,” Steve sighed and you nodded, letting go of his hand reluctantly.

Although the moment was short, you appreciated Steve going out of his way to make you feel better. He comforted you and even made you laugh. It was like for a moment, you weren’t in this situation. For a moment, it felt like it was just the two of you - living and living happily.

_________________________________ 

While you and Steve were talking, the group in the shed was able to bring Will back. Not fully, but partly. It turned out that the recollection of his memories was helping him gain some control within his body. It wasn’t much, but it was enough. He tapped his fingers until he spelt ‘Here’ and with every memory someone spouted, a new letter came after. Eventually, you all got the answer that you had been hoping for.

“Close the gate,” you all read aloud in unison. Before you could even process that however, the phone started ringing and a nauseating pain was sent to the pit of your stomach.

The feeling only worsened when Nancy yanked the phone out of the wall. You already knew it was too late.

“They know where we are,” you stated and the monsters screeching in the distance only proved that.

“That’s not good,” Hopper muttered. “Come on. We gotta go.” He motioned for everyone to follow him, but there was nowhere to go. It was too dangerous to leave. It was too dangerous to even think about leaving. You could already feel those things nearby. 

You shook your furiously, “No, no. Get away from the windows!” Everyone was stunned by the volume of your voice, but seeing as you were the only strong enough to handle these things, no one complained. They easily compiled and started huddling up in the living room, preparing themselves for attack. You subconsciously put your arm in front of Steve and the other out in front of you. The growling steadily grew closer and closer and the closer it got, the more you tensed up. You weren't strong enough yet and you knew it, but that wasn't an excuse. You still had to protect them. You would protect them. 

So you waited, waited for something to come crashing through the door... But it never came. Instead, the growling was replaced by thrashing and you instantly knew who it was. 

Something came crashing through the window and everyone pointed their weapons at it. You glanced over and it was one of the monsters, freshly dead. Everyone else was alarmed but you. 

“It's okay,” you whispered, but they were more confused than reassured. The lock to the door slowly started to turn and everyone aimed their weapons at it.

With a small click, the door unlocked and creaked open. Once they set foot into the house, you smiled softly. 

“Eleven.”

[clean-bands-dirty-stories]

Why? - F.W. (part one)

A/n: So I was on a marathon with my family and we got to that part in the last movie where Pansie was all "get him!" after Voldemort said to give Harry up and then ALL the Slytherins got punished so I started thinking about how it could have gone differently and this happened and y'all once I thought it out so perfectly I HAD to write it. For my fellow Green and Silvers.

Word Count: 5300+

MASTERLIST

I didn't like them from the get-go. The Weasley twins. My first day, when I was so excited I just about glowed, sitting on that sorting stool to get sorted. When I got the house I had crossed my fingers for because I had heard all about Hogwarts and had analyzed myself and predicted where I might go and had been RIGHT- and I loved to be right. When I was at my highest, having my golden moment, grinning like a child on Christmas and not noticing until later as the other first years were confused by the innocent, friendly, kind little girl they'd thought would be Hufflepuff being Slytherin. When I was still unaware of how Hogwarts worked and what it meant to be in Slytherin house, they made sure I knew.

As I made my way to the table at the end with the cheering kids in silver and green, I heard them. I heard them booing. I froze in my tracks, not down the first step yet, where everyone could see me. My face was wiped of my smile and my face had gone pale- I could feel it in the rushing feeling in my head. I slowly turned to look where it was coming from. The Gryffindor table. Two red-headed twins were grinning ear to ear as they screamed "BOOOOO!" on the top of their lungs, shaking their head and nudging each other like it was some grand joke. One of the twins - they MUST have been twins - caught my eye and his smile faded. He looked guilty. Good.

My sadness and discomfort and crushed happiness turned to anger, my face heating up. There was a hand on my back and I turned to see McGonagall. She gave me a pitying look before I turned away and finished my walk to my table, chin held high and back straight, my hands curled into fists at my side. I was angry.

When the sorting went through - my frozen moment of devastation was overshadowed and forgotten when Harry Potter of all people was sorted and went into Gryffindor - and the feast started, I turned to one of my table mates. "When I came down, there were these Gryffindors... booing me."

The girl, who had dirty blonde hair and brown eyes, was a bit older than me. Her expression darkened and she seemed to age far too many years. "One thing you have to get straight. In this school, we're not Hogwarts. Ravenclaws, Hufflepuffs, and Gryffindors are Hogwarts." She glared at her food. "They think we're evil. All of us."

The word sent a wave of shock through my system. "Evil?" My voice was too light- I couldn't get any power behind my words. It was all air.

The girl placed a hand on my shoulder, her face sad and softer than before. "Don't worry, you'll have the rest of us, okay? And it's not so bad. Wait until you see the common room. Just ignore the other houses- it's better that way."

The rest of the meal I was fine. It was when I got tripped in the hallway on my way to the dorms that I finally lost it, only able to keep it together long enough to get into the rooms before I began crying. One of the other girls ran to get someone older and before long a brunette girl with green eyes came, pulling me into her chest and rubbing my back. "I'm not evil," I sobbed.

"I know," she soothes me. "They're all just arseholes, don't mind them."

So I didn't. Her words made me feel a lot better, but her actions were what soothed me. She was gentle and kind, considerate and soft. If she was a Slytherin then being a Slytherin wasn't bad and that was that. I made a vow after that night: I'd never let other kids' gossip and bull crap affect me. I would let it upset me again, let alone cry. I would NEVER cry over other peoples’ opinions. Not these peoples'. You know what, not anyone else's either.

I kept that vow, too.

My first potion's class was with Harry Potter himself. He was sitting next to a girl with bushy brown hair that I think made her look bigger- like a peacock uses its colorful feathers. I think it suited her. Professor Snape, the one teaching potions, was shooting question after question at Harry, ignoring the girl next to him as desperation crossed her face, her hand as high in the air as she could get it, wiggling.

It bugged me. Harry looked incredibly uncomfortable and the girl looked about ready to explode and Snape was being a dick. "Obviously he doesn't know." Snape looked at me sharply. Everyone did. It didn't scare me. "But SHE does. Why don't you ask a question where you want the answer, not just an opportunity to make a first year look like an idiot?"

The room was so silent that no one even dared breathe. Snape's eyes flickered to my tie, his features twisting with disgust when he noticed the green and silver. "Learn how to talk to teachers, or hold your tongue." I glared at him and that seemed to knock him silent for a second. He looked away, moving on, and I let out a soft breath I'd been holding in. I felt eyes on me and I looked over to see Harry and the girl both looking at me. The girl seemed bewildered, but Harry was smiling at me. I gave a small smile back.

Maybe not all Gryffindors were bad.

When I looked back over at my partner to whisper about how I was surprised I didn't get detention with how angry Snape had seemed, the words died on my tongue. My partner, a boy named Blaise, was glaring daggers at me. Even more viciously than Snape. "Who's side are you on?" He sneered at me.

I looked forward again and was quiet for the rest of the class. What did he mean 'who's side'? Weren't we all Hogwarts students? Was the girl who had told me it was Hogwarts versus Slytherins... serious? I was realizing I hadn't really believed her. I figured maybe a lot of people across houses didn't get along but there had to be more friendships than not. I saw twins get sorted into different houses. But I guess neither of them was in Slytherin. Harry didn't seem to hate me... though the girl next to him had seemed like she'd seen a ghost when I'd stood up for him...

I kept my mouth shut for a whole week and a half. Snape didn't much mess with Harry (though he did take opportunities that popped up) as much as he did another Gryffindor. Neville Longbottom. Harry was good at handling himself when Snape got on him. He was a tough kid and seemed generally unbothered, keeping his pride and gave little reaction passed a glare or an eye roll behind Snape's back. Neville, on the other hand, was awkward and sensitive, flinching at everything Snape said. Even if Snape was nearby or shot him a look from across the classroom. It hit every nerve in my body and was grating on every instinct I had.

Then Snape crossed a line. He threatened to hex Neville's road if the boy got the potion wrong. Neville made a pathetic sound that was halfway between a choked sob and a surprised gasp and the Slytherin next to me - Draco Malfoy this time - snickered under his breath.

"You can't do that."

Silence again, like after the first time when I'd stuck up for Harry. Draco leaned away from me as if I was diseased or had turned into a werewolf. "What," Snape asked, dragging the word out. "Did you just say to me?"

I turned around in my chair to meet his eyes, my expression determined and as controlled as his was. "I seriously doubt that Dumbledore would approve of your harming a student's familiar simply because they were confused on a spell. That's not proper punishment, Professor." I spat the last word like it was poison and his eyes narrowed.

"How would you have me handle his lack of talent then, Miss Black?" As he said my last name an emotion flickered across his face that I vaguely recognized. It was the same one that I hadn't taken much notice of my first day but was apparent to me now as I thought back on it. The same look in McGonagall's eyes as she called my name for me to be sorted. It made me nervous. They couldn’t know. Not yet.

"Maybe teach him. Then he'll know how to do it."

Someone gasped. Snape flared. "Well, since I'm so incapable of teaching him, obviously, then you will have to try for me." He took steps toward me and I genuinely felt terrified. "You and Mr. Longbottom will meet in here for detention every day for the next week and during class, you two will be paired up. If he fails, so do you." He leaned forward, flattening the palm of his hand on my desk and leaning down to get in my face. "Do I make myself clear?"

My angry gaze leveled with his and I didn't move back, which he seemed to have not been expecting as he leaned a millimeter back himself. "Crystal." I nearly growled the word. He slowly stood, moving back up the aisle to the front of the classroom. "Resume your potions," he snapped. The room returned to their potions.

After class I was finally free, only to have the back of my robes yanked on as I was dragged into a darker hallway. I choked on the pressure against my neck but was knocked breathless before I could scream once I got my air back as the same person slammed me into the nearest wall. I blinked rapidly to try and re-orient myself as unknowing students passed by. Just as the last one disappeared, the world stopped being confusing and I recognized the faces in front of me. Draco Malfoy and his two brutes- Crabb and Goyle. I hadn't much liked any of them but Draco had been generally friendly with me so they left me alone.

Now there wasn't a chance of friendship in their eyes. Or mercy. "Stop standing up for Gryffindors," Malfoy sneered. I shrunk back into the wall. "Aren't you a Slytherin? Don't you have any pride? Any self-respect? You're making the rest of us look bad."

Gathering my courage, I curled my hands into fists. "I think you're doing that fine on your own," I eased. "Looking bad. A kid is being picked on by a teacher and you're laughing as if it's funny." I scoffed. "You're a coward hiding behind bullies. And I won't stand by and let it happen- I don't care WHO you are."

Crabb was the one holding me against the wall but Draco was the one speaking, and I guess that made him just as powerful because he leaned in my face, unfazed by my words. "One day you're going to regret not keeping your mouth shut."

"And one day you'll regret not having said anything," I shot back. "It will be different, but we will both regret. The difference will be YOU will want to go back and change it. I will not."

"Why you-" Draco began.

He was interrupted. "Let. Her. Go." The four of us looked over to see an older Hufflepuff boy - a Prefect, by the badge on his robes - flanked by two tall, red-headed, identical Gryffindors. I recognized the twins from the sorting ceremony. They were the ones that had booed me. "I think you boys need to step away from the situation and calm down before this gets too ugly.

Draco hesitated before sneering a, "Come on Goyle, Crabb. This isn't worth our time." I felt the grip leave me as they left.

My eyes moved to the three boys who had rescued me. "Thank you," I said to the Hufflepuff. I ignored the twins.

"No problem. You're a first year?" I nodded. "I'm a fourth year. Cedric Diggory."

"Ylva Black," I exchanged. "You can call me Liv."

Cedric smiles, nodding. One of the twins stepped forward, next to him instead of behind. "I'm Fred, this is George. We're Weasleys. Third years." He seemed to be rambling just a bit and sensed how awkward and inorganic it was because he winced, blushing almost as red as his hair. George shot his brother a weird look and Cedric rose an eyebrow, smiling. I was unamused.

"Thanks again." I turned around and walked away.

I didn't talk to them again for quite a while, though I did see Fred in the hall constantly. Don't ask me how I knew it was Fred and not George- I just knew. There was something about the twins that made sense to me. I couldn't name it or make sense of it but it took me one interaction and then I could tell them apart... mostly. Sometimes I noticed one of them and wondered which it was. Not that I was genuinely interested in the twins who were absolute jerks but more, I liked a challenge. No one could figure out the difference. I wanted to be the first.

For a while, it was just me and Neville. We spent every potions class together and as long as he listened to me, I could keep him calm and ignore Snape's antagonizations. The only incident for a while was when the Slytherins and Gryffindors first met to learn how to fly a broom. Draco picked up Neville's Remembrall. Neville had become someone I sought to protect so it had been my instinct to step up for him, and a lot of people looked at me, almost expecting it. But going up against a teacher was different than going against Draco Malfoy, a fellow Slytherin first year. My moment of hesitation allowed Harry an opening.

The rest was my smiling and laughing as Harry put Draco in his place- until McGonagall showed up. Harry tossed me the Remembrall and I nodded, tucking it into my pocket.

At first, I thought all the Slytherins hated me as much as Malfoy, but one morning a Slytherin boy sat next to me and started talking, looping two girls across from us into the conversation. One of the girls wasn't interested but the other was and the three of us held a conversation the whole meal. The boy's name was Samuel Wiseman and the girl was Bertha Grimm. For the most part, I didn't talk to them, but during mealtimes we found each other. Then we began to hang out regularly sometimes too. When I had no one else, I had Bertha (who's name we shortened to 'Beth') and Sam.

After a month of somewhat peace was over, I ran into Cedric again. Some not-so-nice Gryffindors slammed into my shoulder, knocking me, and I nearly face planted. Cedric seemed to appear out of thin air to steady me, his eyes full of concern. "You okay?”

"Yeah," I sighed, glaring back but unable to spot who might have caught my shoulder. I looked back and Cedric, my expression softening. "It's fine, I'm getting used to it."

That seemed to bother him even more. He studied me carefully. "What are you doing later?" I shrugged. "Wanna hang out? I can help you with homework and you can tell me how your first... almost two months now, yeah?"

"Yeah," I confirmed. "I'd love that. Wanna meet in the library?" He nodded enthusiastically and I grinned for the first time since the sorting ceremony. "Awesome. See you then."

"Watch your back," he called after me. "I really will track down some Gryffindors and skin them if I see they're being too rough with you." I laughed, even though it wasn't really a joke. He was being serious in a light manner because he knew that it was a problem and he was trying to make it clear he wasn't going to tolerate it, even if he didn't want to upset me.

That night I told him everything. I told him about Sam and Beth but also about Crabb, Goyle, Draco, and the two girls who had welcomed and comforted me the first day but who now ignored me, not being hateful but not being friendly either. I told him about my few run in's and shared glances or teeny tiny sort-of-interactions with Harry Potter and how they'd gotten me in trouble. I told him about the twins booing me my first day. How Snape hated me, but Professor Flitwick shot me comforting smiles every once and a while so I was sure he liked me. I told him about the looks McGonagall had been shooting me when she thought I wasn't looking- a lot of really unimportant things I hadn't really thought were bothering me. I told him about how much I was loving Hogwarts despite all the hiccups.

He told me about his life too. About classes and friends and how he wasn't really a Prefect because he was only a fourth year. He'd just been messing around with a friend's badge that another one of his friends - a Gryffindor - had swiped as a joke when George had run up to him and told him that he and Fred have stumbled across some Slytherins who seemed to be ganging up on another student. He told me about some kids he knew in the other houses when I told him that Gryffindors seemed to be everywhere, joking that Gryffindors were the loudest but Hufflepuffs were the most fun. Then he began to tell me about some spells he was learning, quietly teaching me little harmless things to make me laugh. Tripping curses and spells that made bubbles come out of your wand. How to make a small bubble around us that blocked out all sound, or how to put my new levitating spell I’d just learned to hilarious use. He was a lot more trouble than I'd realized- even if he was only doing it to make me laugh.

Eventually we got to homework, where we stayed quiet except when he walked me through things I got hung up on. Mostly we worked on our different projects in comfortable silence.

My other friendships were a lot more casual- more like acquaintanceships. There was never a time when if we stopped talking it didn't feel... awkward. And once we stopped, it was hard to get into it again. With Cedric, it felt like I'd just found my long lost older brother. And he seemed to think the same. "It's late," he told me as I yawned my longest yawn yet. "How about you get to bed?" I turned a mournful look towards him and he returned a gentle smile. "We can do this again if you wish. Maybe regularly? Every Friday or Saturday?” He tilted his head back and forth. I smiled. “But you need sleep."

I sighed, nodding. "Okay, mum."

Cedric rolled his eyes but his smile never faltered. "If I'm going to be in charge of you, I accept big brother only." We looked at each other for a few seconds and then I nodded. Yep, that would do. We parted ways for the night and I headed to sleep.

Life basically passed like that. Cedric and I had a homework-and-chill session every weekend, the day changing based on our week and if we were available. My meals, some classes I spent with Sam and Beth, or how I had detention and potions with Neville. Everyone else pretty much ignored me except Fred Weasley, who would wave at me every time we made eye contact no matter how much I ignored him, and Harry and Ron - Ron was a friend that stuck around Harry and seemed to be all around pretty friendly to those who weren't total dicks - who would shoot me looks. Usually Harry initiatives the distant contact and usually in potions when I scrambled to block Neville from Snape. Little nods, fleeting smiles. The good stuff- casual style. Life stabilized and I was happy with my lot.

Then Halloween happened.

The panic, the troll in the dungeon, me curling into a ball and pressing my forehead to the table and closing my eyes and covering my ears while everyone screamed and tried to run out. Dumbledore calming us down. Going back to the dorm where Beth found me and hugged me, glad I was okay, and Sam was pulled to the boys' dorm by an older brother of his. He'd told us about him once.

After that night, rumors passed around about Harry Potter and the troll, and how 'Ron and Harry' became 'Harry, Ron, and Hermione'. Hermione actually began talking to me, taking the time after class while we moved to our next to ask how the last weekend had been. I told her about my friendship with Cedric Diggory and she told me about her friendship with Harry Potter and we laughed because it sounded like a competition but it wasn't.

When I first talked to Harry, he told me about his upcoming Quidditch game. I promised him I'd come but didn't promise I'd cheer for him and he got me to promise that I would cheer for him if he would give me a reason to. I promised that if it happened then I would.

At the game, I didn't get the chance to cheer for him. My knuckles were white as I gripped a railing, eyes glued to the sky and lips parted in worry. Harry was fine and I was calm until his broom started to jerk, zigzagging through the sky and trying to buck him off. People around me gasped and I appreciated for a moment that they cared. People were wrong- it wasn't Hogwarts against Slytherin. You could see the proof if you looked close enough. Even if they pretended to hate people from other houses, when someone was in danger Slytherins worried too. Even if they wouldn’t admit it.

Thankfully the broom stopped jerking just as I got my wand out and tried to think of something if he fell off. I relaxed, sitting back but leaving my wand out. There wasn't further incident but I was starting to worry about Harry Potter and the luck he had. Or, more accurately, the luck he DIDN’T have.

Other than these little blips of drama, it was just school. After detention ended Neville and I only talked to each other during potions. I did most of the work as he handed me things and read instructions. It was still teamwork enough that Snape couldn't yell at us. Harry and his friends seemed to be getting distracted by something so we didn't talk to each other much and Sam's brother kept trying to separate him from me - I realized it was ME when I saw the two brothers joking with Beth but then the older one, Michael, pull him away when I approached... several times. So Beth and I didn't hang out as much while she hung out with Sam and left me to hang out with Cedric.

Christmas I spent alone.

Most of the people I talked to left and the rest - Harry and Ron specifically - I didn't feel comfortable or close enough to rationalize crashing their Christmas. Cedric sent me a package of chocolates and a Christmas sweater that he'd said would be perfect for me. It totally was. I wondered briefly if he'd had someone make it for me...

I was out in the snow in my new sweater when he found me. Fred Weasley. "Hey."

I turned to face him. I frowned, turning away. "Hello."

He moved next to me. "You're less cool when you hate me."

"You're easy to hate," I replied evenly.

"How do you figure?"

I shot him a dark look. "Why are you here Fred? You obviously don't like Slytherins- you proved that when you BOOED me when I got sorted. So what do you want?"

He seemed to have a lot of emotions going through his head at once. "How did you know I was Fred?"

I looked away. "I don't know." I felt his eyes on me. "I actually don't," I repeated. "I just... I look at you and your brother and I DO."

He nodded, letting it go. "When we saw you in the hallway, with Draco and his dogs, George went and got Cedric but I stayed to watch because we were worried they'd hurt you before we could get someone." I looked over slowly. "What you said to them... it was cool." We didn't talk for a few beats. "I'd like to restart. I'm sorry about the sorting ceremony." I rose an eyebrow. "Seriously.” He shifted, righting his shirt for dramatic effect even though it was fine. “Hi, I'm Fred Weasley." He stuck out his hand to me.

Unable to help myself, I smiled. He was too easy going and positive. His smile was too contagious. So I took his hand, shaking. "Ylva Black." I hesitated then added, "You can call me Liv."

He grinned. "Cool."

The same comfortable quiet I felt with Cedric fell and I knew that despite how we'd started things, I had a new REAL friend and I was okay with that. I guess that was my real Christmas present.

The rest of the year passed without much drama for me until word spread around about Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. My worry for him increased and I wondered if being his friend was a good idea, considering how Hermione and Ron were involved. Quirrell was gone and rumors of a dark power hovering over them had first years shivering with fear.

At the end of the day, Fred and I became really good friends, which lead to me meeting George. It was like how my other acquaintanceships were- not often and loud, but fun. George was nice but it was Fred who joined my weekend study sessions with Cedric.

When Slytherin was lined up for the cup, I felt successful. I'd done my part for the glory of my house, though I did feel bad for the glum looks on a lot of my Gryffindor comrades. Cedric waved at me from across the room in congratulations and I grinned back.

I was tired of getting the carpet torn from under me. I was tired of being sure and set in something and then having it turned on it's head. Alas, Dumbledore had one last surprise. He awarded some last minute points, recognizing Ron and Hermione in their part in helping Harry as well as recognizing Neville for standing up to them. Neville's happy smile and wide eyes as people thumped him on the back sent my heart soaring and I didn't even fell bad when Harry got his extra points and the banners turned from green to red- Gryffindor had won. I was the only Slytherin that clapped and it was short lived. Other Slytherins glared at me and I sunk into my seat.

My house hated me.

The train ride was the highlight of my year, which is probably strange but no less true. I spent most of it writing a letter to my dad... even though I knew I'd never send it. I finished it, closing it up and then just staring at it. I'd written letters before but I knew that I wanted to write one at the end of every year, just to summarize what I'd gone through. I had no one else to talk to... Or so I thought.

"Who'd you write a letter to?"

I looked up, smiling as Cedric sat down across from me. "My dad." He nodded and the paused when my eyes fell to my letter again, my face growing sad. I noticed his curiosity and I cleared my throat. "Why are you sitting with me? Cool Hufflepuff fourth year like you? Don't you have any other friends?"

Cedric busted up laughing. "Okay, rude, first of all. Second of all, I CHOSE to come here because I wanted to say my last goodbye. Have one last conversation." He paused. "And threaten you to write me during the Summer to make sure you do." We both chuckled.

"Yeah, I'll write to you." I looked back to my letter.

"What's that about?" He asked gently, jutting his chin to my face. I suppose he was talking about my expression. "Aren't you going back home? Why send a letter?"

I swallowed. "My dad... isn't at home." He grew quiet, his smile faltering. "I don't think he even knows I exist."

He leaned forward, taking my hand. "I didn't know that I'm sorry."

"It's okay." I shook my head, smiling weakly. "You couldn't hurt a fly if you tried." We both smiled a little stronger. "Fun fact: I'm a loner." My eyes fell to the floor. "My mum sort of didn't want me so she gave me away. I mean... she wanted me at first. But my dad- he isn't a good man. She said I reminded her of him - in a latter, I was just a baby when she left me - so she gave me away. I'm... sort of in an orphanage." I shrugged, looking away. "I figured you should know. Friends know those things about each other right?"

Cedric's expression grew even sadder at my question. "Oh Liv..." he moved next to me, putting an arm around me and pulling me into his side. "I'm so sorry."

"It's okay," I whispered, closing my eyes. He was warm. "I have the greatest big brother." I couldn't see him but I knew that he was smiling by the sound of his little gasp, a little choked up.

I don't remember falling asleep but since he had to wake me up, he must have. "We're almost there. You might want to change out of your robes." I nodded, moving away to do so before returning in my normal clothes. I sat down next to him, snagging my folded up letter to tuck it into my trunk where it wouldn't get ruined. "I'd have to ask my dad for sure, but if he's okay with it... do you want to spend some of your Summer at my house?" I looked up at him, eyes shooting a mile wide. "I don't have a mum either but we’d still have nice su-"

I cut him off when I attacked him, wrapping my arms around his neck. "I would love to Ced."

He hugged me back. "I'll make sure it happens then." The rest of the time he told me about what he had planned this Summer and his plan on getting it worked out. When the train stopped I finally noticed that he didn't have his robes on anymore, which made me realized he must have changed when I was asleep. He walked me to his dad, explaining our friendship and asking if I could stay after introducing me. His dad was rather pleasant and seemed excited by the idea of having me over. Now all there was for us to convince the lady at the orphanage... which I promised wouldn't be hard. We moved toward platforms nine and ten where I told them she was waiting for me.

"LIV!" I turned to see Fred jogging up to me. I smiled, catching his ever-contagious grin. "Sorry I just wanted to catch you before you were gone. Write to me will you?"

A weird light filled me. I was THRILLED to have so many people genuinely concerned with keeping in touch. Who would miss me. "Definitely." I paused before holding out my hand. He looked down at it, taking it. But instead of shaking like I'd thought he pulled me closer, hugging me. I was tense at first but then I softened, allowing myself to enjoy the hug. We pulled away as someone called Fred's name, stepping apart. "See you."

"Until next year." Then he turned and walked away. I went back to Cedric and his dad, guiding them to the Muggle train station and to the Head Mistress of the orphanage. This was going to a great Summer, but I was even more excited for my second year of Hogwarts coming up. I had a feeling that some amazing things were about to happen and I couldn't wait.

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