#their ''dont ask me that'' also kinda applies in reverse

[the-clay-quarters]

thinking abouuuut Vincent and gender

I write them with they/them but you can pick any pronouns and won't be corrected. Is this them using any pronouns? Kinda but not really. Vincent's gender is "please don't ask me that", they're mid ongoing gender crisis but don't have the time for that and simply do not think about it. They'd much rather you just assume something instead of being put on the spot (with what is frankly a reasonable question that they've gotten too worked up about).

Vin is afab, originally named Agnes. Their gender Situation started when they were quite young; they were always close to their father and interested in his work*, it's simply easier to convince your colleagues that your son is interested in your studies and is perfectly allowed to join you, rather than your daughter.

(*Researcher and university teacher, they get their penchant for academia and Weird Interests TM from him)

This then evolved into taking them on work trips, where it's less hassle to be a young man in a foreign country. Enrolling them in the university as a man just made sense and was easier for everyone involved.

They still go by Agnes with their family, and in certain circumstances will use feminine terms for themself, but they've also been publicly going by Vincent since they were a child, and are used to using masculine terms on the regular. They never really saw themself as a man or woman, but it was never really something to question.

The Neath is very accepting, much more than they're used to, and it is now in fact something to question. The option to simply pick whichever gender they want is very freshly introduced, the option to be neither is even more so. Someone early on addressed Vincent by they, and they liked it more than they expected, which threw a wrench in their relatively stable gender balance.

They'll figure out what they actually want eventually, maybe when they're less busy.

[year2000electronics]

Honestly my favorite thing about you by far is how you build on aus and fanon of old without being needlessly cruel and disparaging to it. OG reverse falls had a lot of issues, but people tend to get lost in dogging on it as opposed to embracing the beauty that comes with creating new content for it with hindsight and maturity that the fandom of old didn’t have. Basically just thank you for being so kind. Anyway my second favorite thing you do is draw reverse ford like a silver fox you’re so fucking real for that

thank you!! i really do try to be kind and positive about stuff as best as i can when it applies, i know fanon stuff gets a lot of flak for often being derivative or just very shoddy at times but its like. idk. ive always seen the bridge to better fanon being lifting up and supporting what you do like, because the more lamenting that happens the more you end up just sorta chasing this giant invisible strawman of "you guys" who are "making the thing i dont like instead of the thing i like" (as a pretty relevant example, ill see posts pop up in tags complaining about "you guys'" humanizations of a certain triangle... -_- )

because like its true! sometimes fan stuff is dumb. because we're all creating stuff out there so some of its going to be dumb. even some gravity falls stuff is dumb. roadside attraction is dumb. parts of the wendy crush arc are dumb. which is why i want to lift up parts of something i like and when i do point out stuff i dont like i always want to kinda be constructive about why. and i do think that trying to build something i like attracts people! i think they pick up on the passion there! and it just feels so much more rewarding than if i were to complain all day. idk. its all about striking a balance and its something i like to think about and ruminate on a lot as someone who participates in the community of fandom.

its also a bit of a glass houses thing to me, because i dont think i can even claim to have fanon that like, doesnt suck. not in a self deprecating way you just have to understand where im coming from here... because im the type of person who loves to ruminate on how the relationships between people affect them and how it makes their story, which ends up meaning i go REALLY hard on shipping! and someone could point to me and be like "wow youve got Yaoi Brain" or something! and i draw my human bill as a skinny white guy because idk i just Do! and people could call that derivative if they so wished! if i was going around proclaiming that i could 'be better' and 'fix bad fanon' it would just feel ironic to me. because sometimes the art i make isnt perfect too. and im fine with that. its a part of my art to me.

anyways thank you for the ask and the gateway for me to ramble :] i always like talking about this stuff. here's silver fox ford gleeful again

[thatdeadaquarius]

HELP I HAD A REVERSE ISEKAI DREAM WITH GENSHIN LDJFJDKLALDJFJJDKS

(But it lowkey turned into a nightmare by the end and i got jolted awake at 6am)

Omg 😭 rip orah, i honestly get kinda stressed by reverse isekais?? Let alone being IN one 💀 ALSO NOT THE EARLY WAKE UP NIGHTMARES I HATE THOSE SM-

^^^^ GIF WOULD LITERALLY BE MY REACTION IF I EVER GOT, REALLY ANY CHARACTERS FROM ANYWHERE, BUT GENSHIN WOULD SUCK TOO BC OF LESS ADVANCED TIME PERIOD- ^^^

TO GO ON A RANT HERE- WHY I NEVER WRITE ABT REVERSE ISEKAIS THO AND WHY THATD LITERALLY JUST BE AN ACTUAL NIGHTMARE FROM THE BEGINNING FOR ME ORAH:

Like, their world is less complex in my mind, like in a w/o all the capitalism/hundreds of nations/technology/science advancements/knowledge advancements, kinda way

Like itd be overwhelming, and every time i see one of those aus im like "😭😭 youre literally just a stressed babysitter this is NOT fun"

Plus theres no readily available like food in the forests/property laws

And no readily available jobs/u have to apply and there usually like costumer service-

So they couldnt even get regular jobs i feel like- bc u know u wouldnt have the money to support rlly more than ONE person who got reverse isekaied

THEN THERE'S THE DISAPPOINTMENT OF UR WORLD NOT BEING AS COOL/MAGICAL/HARD TO LIVE IN/U DONT ADVENTURE/TRAVEL IS HARD AND EXPENSIVE, AND U CANT EVEN PROBABLY SUPPORT THEM BC MONEY-

LIKE- yeah I kinda hate reverse isekais 😭😭🥲🥲

Also its finals week officially for me before i GRADUATE NEXT WEEK FROM UNI!!

May 5th!! :D

Thanks for the ask orah, my beloved!!!

Safe Travels Orah,

💀♒️

[intergalactic-garbage]

i see you've chosen to be into red dwarf today, which i've never heard of, so i'm currently working out from your posts what it even is at all

my guess went from fiction podcast to musical (a la starkid) to somewhat low budget tv show (made no later than 2007 and likely in the 80s)

it seems fun! and i'm also having fun with my lack of understanding of what it is so it's your call whether you want to tell me or just laugh at my guesses :)

hiiii monarch! i love the phrasing "whats this mf gonna reblog today *spins wheel*" :D <3

red dwarf is a sci-fi comedy sitcom from the uk, which aired some time ago. it's something i used to watch with my dad (still do sometimes) - we have all the series on dvd in czech, and the dub holds a special place in my heart.

as do the characters! the cast features dave lister, last human whos accidentally survived an accident that killed everyone else on the spaceship, wakes up 3mil yrs later, and is only accompanied by rimmer, his former insuffrable roommate (now in the form of a hologram), cat (guy who is from a race that evolved from lister's cat which he sneaked on the spaceship (and the reason why he got sent to stasis for 3mil yrs)), totally flamboyant and very stupid mf (i love him), holly (the ships sarcastic ai interface) and kryten (servant robot who learns to be more human and rebel against his programming).

the cast all have their insufferable qualities that make them so very human. lister is just a guy. hes very punk subculture guy who just views the world through very common sense, likes to poke fun at rimmer, and is gross at times :D but very much is the one to be the voice of humanity and just. empathy. real. rimmer is a horrible know-it-all whos a terrible coward and loves to pesk everyone around him (and drop the blame for things he did to himself on everyone else). he has 97 illnesses and isnt allowed in most public spaces

(this is a hannibal meme but applies to rimmer too well.) hes very autistic coded, his parents hated him, is obsessed with becoming a great world ruler/hero/whatever, and terribly in denial of the fact that hes just sabotaging himself in becoming that. also frequently made fun of for not having a lot of sex with women, but it all just comes of as him being gay and horribly horribly in denial about it.

basically, rimmer was only revived as a hologram to be a companion to lister, and was picked to be the person who was best fit to be listers companion for an eternity in space from every person on the ship of red dwarf (which is said to be big like a small city). which idk but if you ask me thats pretty gay.

the sort of core of the show is the banter of them two, and them being polar opposites in a way, but also, despite how annoyed they are by each other, clearly caring about each other.

the third character is holly, the ships ai with iq in the thousands, who exists to provide info on the ship and have sarcastic remarks. sometime in s2 he switches gender and becomes a woman. dont remember why or how. but then she has this horrible haircut

the fourth character is cat. hes stupid, cares about himself, dresses in flamboyant suits (my personal fashion icon), but never to such an extent that hed become actually unlikable. theyre all kinda annoying but that makes it so good :D the fifth character, who joins the cast sometime in s2 is kryten, android who is their maid. hes very kind and caring and they slowly actively try to disrupt this programming, so he can lie and rebel and just. im soft abt it

the entire show is enjoyable bc of the characters and the fact they all share a single braincell, and the setting allows fun sci-fi shenanigans to happen. like a manifestation of their worst aspects in the form of a planet, a version of earth where time is in reverse, and all that jazz - but it all really serves as a setting for the characters and the bits :D despite all that, often theres a deeper thought underlying the eps, like theyre often on the verge of death, or discussing the morality of something. it's all just very british.

and ahhhh i just love them all they have zero braincells and the humour is so special to me<33 and thank you for asking!!! im literally so happy someone asked me about this :3 also please if theres anything that didnt make sense to you or want to ask further about please do <3

[real-fire-emblem-takes]

Birds of Prey Anima Mages sound busted, and i mean that in the best way possible like yeah on one hand it's busted if you have too many in the party, but on the other hand oooooh boi boss fights could be so damn interesting just by virtue of making them some kinda Anima Magic user

i especially want to know more about the weapon triangle manipulation, like in what way does it work, is it temporary, is it just working like certain weapons(aka the kinds that make it axe > sword > lance instead) from canon and the magic is just included in the triangle, is it an effect applied to allies or foes that reverse how the weapon triangle effects(hah) them? furthermore what even is the weapon triangle like is it just swords, axes, and lances or does it include other weapons, are there separate triangles or is it more like how i vaguely recall it working in Fates(imma be real with you i did not remember what beat what in Fates weapon triangle wise because Astra was busted enough it didn't matter) also are staves and/or healing in general included in any of the magic categories or is it in its own category instead? and can people very poorly attack with the staff like in the Tellius games or are they unarmed if they just have no actual weapon? that was a lot of questions but hey it be like that sometime when it comes to au(and au-adjacent? idk if you want me calling Birds of Prey an au or not) discussions at least for me and yeah it ain't Fire Emblem unless some kinda war crime is being committed (also yeah feel free to tag me still as Naesala Lord Anon, again i'll just actually sign it as that whenever i talk about my own au(though i will still mention it do in fact be me asking the questions like right now), also still working on the au just ideas and actual game progress are very slow right now whoops. though i have come up with some oc ideas though i just don't know whether to mention those by itself or just wait til i have more substantial updates, guess that be up to you to decide whether i just talk about the handful of ocs i have thus far or not?)

On paper, yes anima mages are extremely powerful but also they would probably end up being the second most expensive unit type to constantly maintain because their funky weapons have limited durability and are kinda expensive so like you don't want to have too many on your team at once lmao. Also they are very squishy and dont have the massive range Dark Nages do. Luckily bosses don't have to worry about funds or being squishy :)

Dark mages would also be kinda expensive because of their summons but like you’re not usually gonna be using that many summons per map and also their siege spells are actually infinite use!

Basically just spend responsibly.

Yeah the weapon triangle manipulation is mainly just the reaver weapons which isn't unique to Anima Magic specifically. Hypothetical Weapon Triangle here:

Staves are technically magical in the way that they scale off magic but they aren't included in the weapon triangle and don't work in the same way as the offensive magic categories.

Staff Mages (class name will be changed in the future) like Mary have natural access to brawling which allows them to always be able to fight back regardless of what they are equipped with.

I originally thought that troubadours would fight back using their staves but then that would likely scale off their strength. which they do not have. and is not used by their promotion either. so i decided to just give them Anima right away but give the early game Troubadours low weapon ranks and a 1 MT spell with guaranteed accuracy and nothing else so they still hit like a wet noodle for a while.

[e-jaegerenthusiast]

aot boys kink hcs

here are some kink hcs i found written on a piece of paper during my super important class 🥴 fr i was sitting in class as my professor gives a lecture�� instead of listening i zoned out and wrote different kinks/overall sexual things down and thought if eren, jean, and levi would be into them 🤞🏻

eren art by aidan.k_art on insta

levi cosplay _hakkencoser_ on insta

warnings/tw; like many many kinks 💀

would they let you choke them?

eren: yes. surprisingly, it’s the only dom-like thing he lets you do him. (other than ride him) he would love the thrill of his life in your hands :,) although it would take him a while to let you do it to him. he says it mid-sex, i’ve written something for it with eremika here ;)

jean: yes yes yes. he loves it so much, gets him whining and moaning

levi: i feel like he’s claustrophobic :( so he’ll let you put your hands around his neck, just don’t put in any pressure. the first time you did it was when you were riding him, you didn’t really think much of it as you put your hands around his neck, giving pressure with your fingers. suddenly his lust-filled droopy eyes turned into one of horror. pulling you off of him as he grabbed his own throat, coughing. you apologized so fucking much and hated yourself for it. he hugged you and told you it was okay, that he’s sorry but it brings him ptsd and makes him uneasy :(

choke you?

eren: surprisingly, no 😳 i feel like he would love to see his own purple fingerprints on your hips. however, he doesn’t like the bruises he leaves on your neck, he inspects them with a frown, kissing all of them and burying his head in your neck. once he chokes you, he feels animalistic. more than ever. its like he doesn’t trust himself to put your life that closely in his hands :(( so once he doesn’t do it anymore, you don’t ask him why. you know him. you know what goes on in his head.

jean: only if you ask him to, he’d be scared to apply too much pressure tho, so he’d do it lightly

levi: yesyesyes. i feel like levi would do all dom things to you mostly when he’s mad at something or at you. he’s the type to grab you by the neck and kiss you passionately. awooga

would they whine?

eren: very. very. very rare. only if somehow you’ve managed to take the upper hand.

jean: yessir. definitely. mommy kink all the way.

levi: mostly no. although he really really needs to. he wont let himself. mostly grunts. although he does when you’re sucking him off, he whimpers and tries to hide it, but you humming around his length throws him over the edge.

would they overstimulate you?

eren: all fuckinggg day. he doesn’t care if you can’t anymore. shaking? pffttt suck it up. literally

jean: only if he’s super horny. would do it if you want to.

levi: not really. he likes it when you overstimulate him 👀— doesn’t really ask you to, however you can obviously tell by the way he bucks up his hips into you or your hand even tho he just came.

their fave position?

eren: he absolutely loves spooning you, fucking into you as your warm back is pressed against his chest, your back arching and head going to his shoulder when he hits that special spot in you and kisses your neck. he can easily hit your g-spot in this postition, loves when you squirm against his chest. his hand holding you close. —he also loves the most weirdest positions omg- he likes bending you in ways that could almost break you like a pretzel - your thighs pressed against your chest, your legs at a wide angle resting on his shoulder—you must take yoga classes for this man he loves fucking you in the positions🥴 even upside down

jean: he loves loves loves when you ride him. he’s called a horse for a reason😩 also loves mirror sex. we know he can get cocky sometimes, so he loves fucking you infront of the mirror as he holds your jaw and forces your eyes on the mirror, fucking you hard. also is a sucker for passionate/slow missionary.

levi: doggy. fuck yes he loves it. or reverse cowgirl omf— loves the view sm. not that he doesn’t like to see your face in sex omg😭 it’s just- he prefers it that way cuz he kinda doesn’t want you to see him, in all his vulnerability. :,) its rare he lets you. but when he does omg- the image is burned into your memory, his face and the way it contorts into pleasure, his thin brows going up as his mouth is wide open— or he’s clenching his jaw.

would they agree to you handcuffing/tying them?

eren: no. he likes to be free LMAO i’m sorry

jean: yes. definitely. finds it so hot but still tugs on them so so much and begs you to untie him.

levi: won’t admit it but he loves it. eventually comes around. pounces on you like a wild dog when you untie him and fucks the shit out of you. grunting as he calls you a brat for tying him.

would they tie you up?

eren: 100% fucker loves to see you squirming.

jean: not really, he tries it out of curiosity but just doesn’t know what the fuck to do without your touch. likes it better the other way ‘round.

levi: yes. he would like to take revenge for you tying him up. would def torture and edge you a lot.

let you blindfold them?

eren: never. would like to see you and every single expression on your face.

jean: yes. loves it. makes him so so sensitive and he loves the thrill of not knowing where he’s gonna feel your touch.

levi: maybe. if you really beg him and annoy him for it.

blindfold you?

eren: yes yes yes do i even need to elaborate

jean: not really. same as tying you up, he would get too nervous and flustered and not know what to do.

levi: absolutely. he’d actually almost chuckle at how responsive you are to his touch. he’d literally just sit there for minutes, gliding his hands over all parts of your body, your arms, legs, thighs, stomach. loses sense of time as he plays with your body.

would they let you peg them?

eren: absolutely not. fucking scoffs and chuckles at you and mocks you when you suggest it.

jean: yes. with persuasion. he’s mostly open and experimental. would he end up liking it? maybe. he finds the feeling very weird at first, but asks you with a blush if you can do it again another time.

levi: no— thinks it’s disgusting.

anal?

eren: yes. yes. yes. would absolutely destroy you. loves the tight asf feeling.

jean: would try, doesn’t like it. makes him cum too fast 💀

levi: thinks it’s filthy.

breeding kink?

eren: yes. loves filling you up. doesn’t like baby talk tho— he hates kids 💀💀 is sorry but maybe eventually?

jean: likes to cum on your back, stomach, or tits more. however he loves the idea of having a family with you. definitely cums in you while baby talk + “you’d be such a good mommy.”

levi: he rarely cums in you, you’d have to beg him to or wrap your legs around his torso, then he can’t stop himself. doesn’t trust condoms or birth control. he’d say there’s still a chance of you getting pregnant 🥴— not that he doesn’t want a baby with you- not yet tho. he needs to warm up to the idea of becoming a dad. trauma n all yk.

jealous seggs?

eren: definitely. he’s possessive.

jean: definitely. he’s insecure :(

levi: yes but doesn’t admit it (surprise surprise) not a lot tho, he knows he has you wrapped around his finger. doesn’t really show his jealousy much. lets it eat away at him silently:/

lets you pull their hair?

eren: hell no. you do it anyway , he goes absolutely feral.

jean: yes. loves it so so much. also open to basically anything that makes you happy

levi: even tho he doesn’t like anyone touching his face or his hair, he warms up to it. likes the feeling of your hands in his hair. (also- mostly kiss his scars. he’ll actually cry. oop imma write a fic on that ✍🏻) he also loves loves loves when you shampoo his hair for him. gets him turned on. did y’all know thats an actual kink

would they spank you?

eren: definitely. more mid-fucking to see your reaction and the way you clench around him.

jean: likes to hold and squeeze your ass more as you ride him.

levi: oh fuck yeah. when you act like too much of a brat, he makes you go on all fours, or lay on your chest on his thighs, giving you spanks and making you count. talking to you after each spank, “will you be a brat again, huh?” spank, “you do it on purpose dont you? like to rile me up? hm? get me fucking mad like this?” another spank as he molds the flesh of your ass with his palm after each one, holding himself back from kissing the flesh.

face slapping?

already made drabbles for you slapping them

eren: yes yes yes. he would be a sucker for the innocent look in your eyes as tears swell up in them. he would do it repeatedly and keep bringing your jaw back to look at him after each slap.

jean: no, he doesn’t have it in his heart 🥺 would love if you did it to him.

levi: this is very difficult. i’ll leave it for you to decide between these two; 1. he doesn’t lay his hand on women. (spanking’s an exception in his book, other than that, hell no) 2. he only does it when he’s angry. like genuinely mad at you during sex, so that’s how he takes it out on you. but kisses you afterwards.

dacryphilia?

eren: hell yeah he loves when you cry for his cock, for him. this fucker does anything on purpose just to make you cry. gives a sadistic smile when tears finally come to your eyes.

jean: no, he wouldn’t wanna make you cry. although you do cry for his horse cock😩 he’d have a concerned expression on his face as he wipes you tears with his thumb, “what’s wrong ,baby?”

levi: absolutely not. literally despises crying. for himself and other. especially you. he’d wipe your tears as soon as they come when his dick is in your throat.

knife play?

eren: YES. he would purposely put a little pressure on the knife to scare you. this mfs a sadist. but he would be very careful to not hurt you. (if you ask why he would be into this but not choking you, it’s cuz with a knife, he knows he won’t actually fuckin stab you. he has control over the knife. his hands, he’s afraid not.) pain

jean: no omg— he would think you’re joking at first, his face forms the most horrid expression as he asks you if that’s an actual thing💀

levi: yes, he would never put pressure on the knife tho. he’d only glide it accross your body teasingly, the cold blade making you shiver under his touch as his eyes go dark. would like to do it to you when you’re blindfolded. doesn’t want you to see that dark look in his eyes.

blood play?

eren: yes. he likes to sometimes bite on your lower lip so hard it draws blood, he would keep kissing you, the iron-like taste not bothering him the slightest. it turns him on. also loves when you make him bleed by scratching your nails on his back, he throws his head back and fastens his thrusts 😩

jean: not really, my baby would get concerned— blood makes him uneasy 🥺

levi; absolutely not. too much ptsd and trauma from the sight of blood. doesn’t wanna see it painting your soft skin at all.

gun play?

eren: not really, he’s too violent to be handling a gun in sex.

jean: no—

levi: yes. he’d empty the gun beforehand tho, without you knowing.

candle wax 😳

eren: not really, he doesn’t like the redness it brings to your skin afterwards.

jean: likes if you do it on him, fucking loses it. he actually cries and whimpers, making you concerned but he nods his had swiftly, urging you to continue. likes the burn, reminds him of your touch, it’s not really any different from the burns your fingertips leave on him upon your touch.

levi: yes omfg- he loves it. he would also blindfold you for this one, probably tie you up too. loves to see you squirming in this situation. (omg i read this one fic on wattpad called “submit” and he was using candle wax and ice— AWOOGA)

ice play?

eren: yes yes yes, he’d run the ice down your stomach after rolling it on your nipples with his hands, he’d put it on your clit and chuckle as you squirm from the coldness of it. goes down on you to warm you up with his tongue afterwards.

jean: he likes it when you use it on him. holding the ice between your teeth as you run it over his nipples and down his chest. he’d be squirming and moaning.

levi: fuck yes. he’d put it in his mouth and kiss you with it, the ice melting between both of your tongues as he hums in your mouth. he’d also run it down your stomach and your nipples as he holds it in his mouth. the contrast of the cold ice and his warm tongue making you moan and whimper beneath him.

podophilia (foot fetish) dont read that as pedophilia uhm💀

eren: not really no, never crosses his mind.

jean: yes yes yes. omg absolutely this man having a foot fetish is canon to me😩 he’d love you giving him a foot job omf- would whine so much. also would kinda like licking your anckles and your toes as you giggle

levi: uhm. you must already know this clean freak. he thinks it’s fucking disgusting. i agree with him

ear fetish

eren: he likes it when you nibble on it or bite the shell of his ear. absolutely his weakest and sensitive spot

jean: not really idk why but no

levi: would nibble and tug on your ear as he’s fucking you, head burried in your neck as he pants and grunts.

food play?

eren: would loved to drizzle honey or whipped cream on you and lick it off your chest or stomach.

jean: would love for you too do it to him, with whipped cream or chocolate on his abs and chest, even his neck. he’d be a moaning, panting mess.

levi: does not like to involve food with sex 💀

chastity (holding back from sex to rile themselves or you up)

eren: hell no💀 he’s an impatient fuckin bastard. cannot handle going without fucking you for more than a couple days

jean: would love for you to do it to him. would beg you and plead as his cock throbs for days, though you know he likes it when you don’t give it to him instantly.

levi: yes yes yes. he would make himself go without sex for weeks. you have to beg him to stop and just let you fuck him, but he’d mutter sum about needing to “train his own stamina and self control, and your patience, brat.” but when you do break through him, trying to seduce him after weeks, it would be some of the best sex y’all have. going for rounds on rounds.

voyeurism

eren: as much as i love the “eren watching you fuck jean/reiner”— i think his possessive self will never ever let another man touch you. i mean cmon have u even read 139 🥲

jean: dont do that to him 🥺 he’s gonna be super insecure like omg- no

levi: absolutely not. do not test this man. he might not show his jealousy openly but you are his and only his.

role playing?

eren: i feel like he’s not that into it but he’d do it, he’s very picky so hmm maybe good cop and bad cop? 👀

jean: as i mentioned before, he’s very experimental and would do almost anything you ask of him, so yes. he’d be into doctor/patient ;) he likes it more when you’re the doctor but you can switch too oh my god bye now i’m thinking about jean in a white thingy doctors wear omf

levi: only captain/subordinate 😩😩😩

daddy kink

eren: not really, it makes him think about being an actual dad which turns him off 💀 sorry to crush yalls dreams 🤞🏻

jean: as i said, mommy kink. though he would like it if you addressed him as daddy while he takes control.

levi: no💀 finds it fucking weird. lowkey makes him sad n think about his dad and who he is or where he is he like being called captain sometimes tho ;)

degrading?

eren: fuck yes likes degrading you all the way. “look at you, my little slut.” “such a whore for my cock hm?”

jean: would like to be degraded 😁

levi: would keep it on the minimum— occasional “brat”s or “dumbass” jdjsjs nothing too intense. he has a way with his words :)

somnophilia sneaked this in at 200 when i forgot to add it cuz it’s my absolute fave kink

eren: he’d play with your body for minutes on minutes, loves to see you so responsive to his touch even in your sleep. he rubs slow circles on your clit, to get you wet. raises his brows when he notices you’re already soaked in your sleep. he literally fucks you awake. shoves his length in you balls deep as you scream and wake up— hitting his chest as he chuckles at you

jean: you’d both be asleep, until you wake up to the feeling of jean humping your thigh, whimpering in his slumber softly, you smirk. he’s chasing his high in his dream, mumbling your name as it’s barely recognizable. he wakes up to your mouth wrapped around him, cumming so fast as soon as he realizes he’s awake.

levi: he barely gets any sleep. but as he’s laying down next to you, head buried in his book while you’re stuck to him like a koala, he’s content. having one arm wrapped around your body and hand stopping at your waist. he’s brought out of the focus of his book by you moving against him. at first he thinks you’re waking up for some reason, then is proved wrong when you’re repeatedly grinding against his thigh, your leg wrapped around it. he chuckles, catching himself off guard. he watches as you hum in your sleep and say his name. he starts slowly meeting your grinds against his thigh, shaking it. he’s now rock hard in his shorts, teasing your hole through your panties with the hands on your back. you end up cumming in your sleep, he cums in his pants. fuck.

••••••••••

© all content belongs to e-jaegerenthusiast, do not repost or copy any of my work

and there we have it— sorry if i left anything out- these are all the kinks i could think of for now 🥴

also ik i usually write hcs for aot and jjk boys but with this one, i kinda felt like only doing aot. since the paper i found had these 3 boys written on it 🤪

[yourstruly-thenarrator]

Welcome! Please enjoy yourself! I know I am...~

!-Pinned post-! Please read;

Main account: @animnightmare

Alt main: @morally-gray-omens (contact me here if its been a while with no contact from me!)

This is a RP account for the narrator from the stanley parable!

Lightly updated for my return!

WARNINGS FOR THE ACCOUNT:

[If theese apply to you, should probobly mute it. Dont have to ofc!]

Lots of cursing. The narrator is extremely abusive and manipulative twords others, probobly has acute Narcissism. There is some horror/weirdcore imagery including eyes. Lots of long posts. I do my best to do readmores, but when rping in rbs, there's not much I can do. Also possibly derealisation? I'm back at recognizing it when its not outright, but I thing I'll mention it to stay on the safe side.

I do my best to tag things, but things do slip through the cracks, and it's also kinda hard to avoid some of this when interacting with this account as a whole. So if you want to avoid it altogether, please feel free to not interact with the account.

Rules!

I only really have one rule for this account that isn't a rule of the comunity or my accounts as a whole. Wich is; dont break the fourth wall of rp. You can break the fourth wall of theese being videogame charicters of course, but mentioning in charicter that you're in a RP just makes things kinda not fun imo.

Do interact if!;

You like the stanley parable!

You are a rp account!

You are ok with in charicter responses!

Or all of the above and more! ^^

Muses;

The narrator

[Eyestrain warning]

My main muse

Very full of himself

Stuck in the skip button ending

Nickname Skips though he resents having a nickname in the first place

"Why would I need a different name??? I'm THE narrator!"

"Usually talks like this"

"Somtimes like this"

"Now and then like this"

"Also like this somtimes"

It usually depends on his emotions and the context

You have full permission to hurt him at any moment, physically or emotionally, without asking first.

He/him but doesn't really care

Stanley![?]

Debut here

currently also frozen in skip button

Not actually stanley

Or human for that matter

We don't know much about him yet

Arguably sentient

Feel free to try and interact with him though

"*Gutteral, inhuman sounds*"

Created by the narrator in a move of reverse logic to show everyone how little he needed company

Mostly ignores stanley and treats him like a brainless child

You don't have to ask to hurt it either,

But why would you??

It/he but doesn't really understand

The owner of the account!

You can call me whatever you want. My primary pronouns are he/they/it/beep, but I use virtually everything. Get creative! I prefer she/her to only be used sparingly, though, if at all, and typically by people im closer to though i take no offense.

As linked up there, my main is @animnightmare . Im ageless across all my blogs, so if you have an age limit in your DNI, I'd suggest just not interacting, and I'll leave you alone whether i break it or not. (i am most certianly old enough to be online though, ill say that much lmao)

[sweetescapeartist]

MY DBS MANGA CHAPTER 70 REVIEW

We learn in the last chapter that the Cerealian Dragon's name is Toronbo when Granolah speaks Namekian. Toronbo grants Granolah's wish but can't make Granolah stronger than the gods.

Here's the confusion I have... Goku is a mortal beyond GoDs so making Granolah the strongest mortal is making him stronger than gods. If you wanna say Beerus has been training and is now stronger than Goku, there's still a problem. It was said that Goku and Vegeta were stronger than some GoDs right before the ToP (but that might be anime only, so maybe it doesn't apply here). So Granolah is stronger than GoDs no matter what. If the gods that Toronbo is speaking of are the Angels, then that means Granolah is Ultra Instinct level of power since Goku is the lowest in Angel tier. But whatever. Bottom line is Granolah is temporarily stronger than Goku who may or may not be stronger than Beerus.

Granolah gets his wish granted and the cost is shortening his life... cool. Not much to say except let's see how its executed.

(I recently read that in DBXV2, during the Infinite History Saga, Videl is enchanted with Towa's Dark Magic spell by Dabura shaving off her life but granting her greater power. So granting power at the cost of lifespan has been done in DB before. Not in canon but in the games.)

Also, Granolah's life being shortened to 3 yrs got me thinking... Currently it's almost AGE 781 in the DBS manga timeline. Goku leaves to train Uub in AGE 784. We got 3 yrs left. The original manga shows Bulma said she hadn't seen Goku in 5 yrs. How I see DBS is that it is an alternate timeline that just happens to have a similar outcome to the EoZ.

So... why is Vegeta learing from Beerus again if Beerus isn't that strong now? Is Vegeta being like Krillin and continuing his learning from a master weaker than him, but gaining wisdom & knowledge? I-is Vegeta becoming Krillin 2.0?! (More like dollar-store Krillin)

I do think beerus got stronger tho. He seems very confident that Vegeta can get stronger from learning from him. Beerus probably saw Goku get UI then decide to train aftet the ToP

Anyways, Beerus is teaching us about hakai/destruction energy. Its erasing something from existence, not just destroying it (we already knew that). But, Vegeta quickly figures out how to do it anyways. By destroying a tiny pebble...

A tangent again but I personally think Piccolo is capable of easily learning Hakai energy. Think about it. Piccolo can create clothing out of nothing, why could he not do the reverse?

Goku is uninterested in what Beerus & Vegeta are doing. I dont know about you, but it sounds like Goku thinks that he's above Beerus in strength. Beerus & Vegeta aren't considered a challenge to him in any way. Goku sees UI as more important & better than anything Beerus has to teach, and Goku is right. Plus Goku learned Hakai on his own while Vegeta needs Beerus to teach him. It's a waste of Goku's time to learn it again.

(God Comics is funny. I imagine Toribot writes them)

Goku says "Let's see which one of us can be the strongest in the universe!" Really, Goku...? At present time, Goku is the strongest mortal in the universe already. He should know that. Then Vegeta for some reason thinks he will become the strongest in the universe. The last time manga Vegeta was the strongest mortal in the universe was... never. He's always behind Goku or whatever new opponent arises. This scene is meant to be comedic that they're arguing over who will be the greatest but it's not funny to me. And yet Vegeta fans still hold on for hope.

But why is Goku concerned about being the strongest between him & Vegeta? Goku is far above Vegeta. They're not rivals at this point. Also, Goku was the strongest in the universe until just a few moments ago. Goku should be saying "I knew bein' the strongest wouldn't last for too long. Roshi did tell me there will always be somebody stronger out there. Hehe! This is gettin' me excited! I can't wait to meet 'em!" (This would alsp parallel Monaito giving Granolah the same advice Goku already knows.)

Also, I guess Broly isn't that strong after all. Bye Broly, you served your purpose. And to think that Goku had said that he thinks Broly is stronger than Beerus...

Oh yeah. So Vegeta destroys a pebble. Impressive? Goku kinda gives a compliment or he is practically saying "Good job Vegeta! You're doing great following in my footsteps!" Seriously, this would be so much better and cooler if this seperate paths of training began right after the Universe 6 vs Universe 7 tournament. That would be the perfect spot to have them train under Beerus & Whis. [Vegeta using Hakai against Merged Zamasu, Goku able to fight Merged Zamasu temporarily because he is getting better at letting his body move on its own, Toppo & Vegeta using Hakai against each other as Goku & Jiren use power above GoDs. That would work so much better.]

Then Vegeta says he's gonna destroy bigger things soon... is that supposed to be more impressive? Its not. But this it to build up Vegeta even though there is nothing amazing about anything he is doing at the moment. Maybe later tho.

So Cerealians can't grow beards. Also I guess Granolah's race don't age? His hair grew when his lifespan was shortened but he has no wrinkles. It seems that they age more gracefully than Saiyans. If he has some wrinkles he would have looked cooler imo. Or those lines under the eyes at the very least. If the wish shortened his life & made his hair grow, it should have also showed that he aged. (Here's an edit I made of "Grampa Granolah." You're welcome)

And remember Vegeta destroying a pebble? Granolah can suddenly destroy big rocks! Cool right?! No? Its not cool? Showing Granolah destroy a much larger object right afterwards kinda belittles Vegeta's accomplishment.

Oatmil is surprised by a boulder exploding. This means one of 2 things. Oatmil is stupid & never saw an Granolah explode a boulder. Or it's implying that the boulder exploding is some technique Oatmil doesn't know of. Idk how he can tell its any different from just blowing up a rock with ki. I think it's supposed to be destruction energy. If it is then, ok. If getting his wish was so easy, then why can't he suddenly learn destruction as well?

Yay! Monaito! (This really should be a Namekian focused arc)

Granolah reminds me of Zamasu with his attitude a bit. Monaito tells him somebody stronger will definetly appear. Granolah has become like Vegeta and is over confident, so he is destined to get humbled. And think about this. Goku can probably train a bit and surpass Granolah within a week.

Granolah can now sense ki. Meaning he can have the destruction technique or UI, because why not?

Monaito blames himself for Granolah's actions. Its not your fault Monaito! You did nothing wrong! Dont be so hard on yourself.

Whis being a creep and peeping on people lol.

Granolah's hair growing was pointless because he cuts it off soon after. Nothing changed visually. This kinda reminds me of how Moro lost his arm. Goku gave him a senzu, Moro grew it back, & then Moro broke his arm when attacking Goku. Then Moro tore his arm off & reattached his old one. There was no need for Moro to grow his arm back then tear it off. Similarly, there is no need for Granolah to have grown long hair then cut it off.

Maki still brings a smile to my face. She & Gas stand out the most out of the Heeters. Maki's personality is kinda like Zangya combined with a teasing Bulma. Gas reminds me of a Krillin/Piccolo fusion with dreadlocks. I also ship Maki x Gas cause they're short and look cute together. (please don't be siblings so I can draw them together🤞)

Granolah fights Oil & Maki. I'm not impressed. They seem like they could be defeated by Chaoitzu (he's stronger than Raditz and probably Nappa now too). Granolah's movements could be seen as UI. If it is or isn't UI, it doesn't matter. Showing off that kind of power is like Goku using Ultra Instinct during a rematch with Nam or King Chappa. Its not effective storytelling. There had to be a better way of showing Granolah's new strength than making him fight opponents that give him zero challenge.

The art is good as usual and the panel flow is nice. Toyotaro is improving at creating the illusion of motion. The environment being used in the fight was smart and a good visual. Toyo still uses a ton of panels almost every page tho. But he's still a better artist than I am.

Granolah appears to have used Hakai again. Not the explosive variant but the sand variant (yes I think there are 2 ways of using Hakai).

The "Sand Variant" that Beerus & Goku (& maybe Granolah) have used.

The "Explosive Variant" Beerus & Vegeta (& maybe Granolah) have used.

Maki thinks the "Hakai" is magic so that's interesting. I would say I'd like for the next enemy to be a magic user but, we know how Moro turned out... 😓

Maki has "ki claws" & I like the idea but it would be better if she had used it against an enemy she can defeat. It doesn't make her look useful in this fight. Gas seems confident when he is about to fight Granolah, but Elec stops him. Gas would've gotten beaten but it make ya wonder what Gas can do.

Granolah appears to be a person that is easily manipulated and persuaded. He even gave information they weren't even asking for. He'll probably be easily convinced and manipulated by Freeza/the Hedters or quickly have a truce with Goku.

The Heeters plan to go to Planet Cereal to get the Dragon Balls. As I suspected, the Cerealian Dragon Balls were created so that it would be easy for wishes to be granted. Gathering 2 Dragon Balls on a nearby planet instead of gathering 7 on New Namek or Earth. Plus these new Dragon Balls ensures no interaction between Earthlings & Granolah/the Heeters. A perfect way to write Gohan & company out of the story... *sigh* 😔😒

We learn Cerealians live for 2 centuries. How's that compare to other races in Universe 7? Freeza & King Cold apparently can live more than 200 yrs, But that may be because they are mutants. Namekians can live for like 500 yrs & its possible for them to reincarnate themselves too. So in a way, Namekians can live forever. Saiyans stay youthful & live to be in their 80's, but rapidly age when they reach their 60's or 70's. Average Earthlings appear live to be in their 80's or 90's but some are over 100 yrs old (Dr. Briefs, Panchy, & Ox King are in their 90's in GT) and others can increase their lifespan through elixers or the Paradise Herb. Just some thoughts of mine.

Maki says "If he ices Freeza..." Ha, an ice pun. Elec wants to defeat Freeza so he can control his army. Its revealed they wanna kill Granolah & that they worked with Freeza to destroy his planet & race. Well... that more than likely means they're gonna die by Granolah's hand or Freeza's. This info is also an attempt to make the reader more sympathetic for Granolah. Granolah is too bland (pun intended) so I don't feel any more sympathy than I already had for him. Elec plans to make Goku & Vegeta fight Granolah since Granolah hates Saiyans. Smart but we all kinda expected it. Not bad writing tho.

The final panel talks about fate bringing the 3 (Goku, Vegeta, & Granolah) together. Sounds like a repeat of the Broly movie.

We've had 4 chapters in this arc & not 1 panel of Freeza... If Freeza doesnt appear & do something in the next chapter then I will be disappointed in the writing. Showing Freeza here and there would give tension and build up until we get the encounter with him. We also have no idea who Oatmil is. Is he an A.I. or a person? Not that big of a deal yet, but I would like to find out soon. Either show Freeza or tell us more about Oatmil next chapter pleaae

This chapter was like oatmeal (the food not the character) without butter, brown sugar, milk, & honey or raisins. Not bad, but not very good either. 

So here's my thoughts on the things that could or could not happen in this arc.

Goku vs Granolah. I don't care for the fight because the power is at a point that it doesnt make sense for enemies to get to without cheating somehow. The fight will look cool but I have no interest in it.

Vegeta vs Granolah will have Vegeta being stomped as always and Vegeta fans will make excuses & complain how it's not fair. A lot of Vegeta fans often make fun of Yamcha & Krillin for getting beat up even though those 2 bravely fight opponents leagues stronger than they are. Vegeta has gotten stomped by opponents more times than Krillin & Yamcha combined but the fans gotta deflect somehow. I don't care to hear or see the complaining again.

The interaction and dialogue between Granolah & Vegeta is going to be more interesting than their fight. But I worry because Toyo isn't the best at writing dialogue.

I have no reason to care about power growth, certain interactions, or Goku & Vegeta's training.

What I am curious about/want to see?

Monaito's well being. I want him to reunite with other Namekians. But I think he's been set up to die.

Lore about the dragon gods & Namekian lore we probably wont get.

I want Piccolo, Krillin, Gohan, & others will be involved. Piccolo because of the Namekian & wosh granting dragon lore. Gohan because his interaction with Granolah eould be interesting since Gohan is half Saiyan & views himself as an Earthling. Krillin & other Earthlings because they can bring tensions where characters like Goku & Vegeta can't. Those 2 are too strong for there to be any real tension. However Earthlings aren't all powerful so them using wits to survive is more exciting. But I doubt any of their involvement.

How long a Cerealian year is? Is it shorter than a Namekian year? How much time will pass for the Cerealian Dragon Balls to be active? How much stronger than Granolah will Goku get? Hopefully the answers aren't lazy...

Will Beerus finally fight somebody? There are 6 mortals that are near or above his power (Goku, Granolah, Vegeta, Broly, Freeza, Gohan).

Who's the villian of the next arc & what explanation is going to be given for them having power on the level of Angels? Angel tier fights don't sound interesting to me anymore. After those kinds of battles, Goku will have no challengers left.

Will Goku disappear to train or something so the story can TRY to match up with the EoZ?

Will Goten, Trunks, & Marron hit their growth spurts within 3 yrs?

Will we get spin-off manga about other characters? PLEASE!? 🙏

Also DBS moved too quickly when it comes to power. Now we're at the point that Goku & Vegeta need to stop being involved in fights for there to be any actual threat or tension. The Buu saga took place in AGE  774. After training for 4 years of peace, Goku thought SS3 & fusion was his limits as a Saiyan and he was right. Well, kinda... Goku was introduced to god ki near the end of AGE 778. Then in AGE 781, Goku masters Ultra Instinct... He mastered an Angel technique in 2 year or 2.5 yrs. That was waaaay too fast. As a result the storytelling & writing are suffering from this rushed progress. Now we're gonna have an Angel tier opponent? According to the pattern of DBS, Goku's gonna end up surpassing the Angels within 2 or 3 yrs after learning god ki. Thats not impressive for Goku, that's terrible writing. And no, Goku getting this strong so fast is not a benefit to Saiyans either. It just shows us that without god ki, Saiyans ain't all that powerful unless they're the legendary Saiyan like Broly. Saiyans didn't even have a concept of training until Goku was trained by Earthlings. Gohan, Freeza, 17, & I'm pretty sure Piccolo as well have all surpassed SS3 without the help of god ki. God ki makes Saiyans look like they have limits. With god ki, the writing is broken....

I got off topic again... Anyways that's the end of my review.

[theunconcernedembalmer]

what’s the issue with elisop? is it just bc you hc aesop as ace? im so concerned by seeing ppl adamantly opposed to mlm/wlw ships but im also genuinely curious about why you dislike it and other lgbt ships so much lol

hmm. that is a strong accusation, n i find it just a bit odd. are you new here? or perhaps you are taking personal offense at my dislike towards a favourite ship of yours and using the lgbt argument as moral high ground?

whatever the case may be, i thank you for asking. if u r truly looking for an answer, its below the cut n it is very very long. mind u these are all my personal opinions n i am in no way policing how others enjoy ships. just in case this wasnt clear; i dont wish to start discourse on this blog, especially since my takes are probably... unpopular.

firstly i would like to address the “disliking lgbt ships” bit, because this has very strong implications in itself. i have nothing against lgbt ships. i enjoy them, even. if the two characters have chemistry between each other, i ship it. however, the moment characterization is broken for the sake of romance, i lose interest. this is generally my stance on ships in general, n this applies for both straight n lgbt ships. 

the ships themselves are fine. however, i do have issues with the ship dynamics, so ill let u in on that.

i want to touch on mlm ships in particular; i believe u are familiar with the top/bottom dynamic that is rampant in these kinds of ships? (i wont deny that this dynamic can be found in other types of ships, but for arguments sake i will be focusing on gay ships because i feel that this occurs more commonly here) its such a popular dynamic that is prone to stripping the personality from one if not both characters, only for them to be reduced to being dominant/submissive. for a character to be pigeonholed into a stereotypical category based on... preferred sexual positions? its just downright insulting, never mind the larger more problematic implications of it. top/bottom is not indicative of someones personality, by the way. flattening multi dimensional characters into these stereotypes is so so so insulting.

unfortunately this is The Most Popular portrayal of just about any gay ship around. ive seen it being used everywhere in so many fandoms n it just about becomes apparent to me that ppl come to stories looking for a Ship. not the stories, nor the characters, just a ship. while id like to say theres nothing wrong with that, keep in mind not everyone is just looking for 2 characters that look pretty next to each other. if i ship something, i see interesting n meaningful interactions between 2 characters, which is so often not the case once u bring in the top/bottom dynamic. why is it so popular? because somehow this is what ppl like from a gay ship n hence it sells. ppl want the drama, characterizations be damned. ppl want to see the big kiss that happens in the end, n maybe the sexy parts that come after. characterizations be damned.

so u can say im a little wary of gay ships when they cross my feed. hell, as a joseph aesop shipper i see this trope everywhere n im pretty disappointed as well. small tangent but i feel like this is the reason why zh0ngli n ch1lde is so popular in g3nshin. i try to see the appeal, i really do, but after a long while of analyzing their respective characters i dont think they have as much chemistry as ppl think they do. dont even get me started on how incredibly ooc they make either of these very interesting n unique characters in ship portrayals. all because of the top/bottom dynamic that ppl want to see. i say this for that particular ship, but this is pretty much the case for a lot of ships out there, n the latter part is painfully true even when the 2 characters do have potential between each other. ill say it again im disgusted by the blatant disrespect to the characterizations if all ppl ever want is 2 pretty puppets to mush lips together. cos thats what theyre essentially reduced to this way.

n its so obvious to see when an artist subscribes to this rhetoric, because u can so clearly see it in the way they draw their characters. the “top” generally has sharper features to go with their “dominating personality”, while the “bottom” has disturbingly softer, feminine, dare i say sometimes child like features “to submit”. n thats where the uwu soft gay trope comes from, i believe. which, in case u still dont know, i hate with a burning passion.

so again for ppl with impaired reading comprehension, im fine with ships, including lgbt ones, but the moment u break characterization for the sake of the ship, im not that okay with it. u want to do it for a short crack comic? fine. but if thats the only way ur portraying the 2 characters then im immediately wary of ur content. ill still look at it cos usually the art is really good, but im very very wary. so im not “adamantly opposed”, just very critical of how the ships are being portrayed. if other ppl want to enjoy their ships like that, sure. just dont expect me to join in on something i dont agree on.

.

now id like to address not shipping “because i hc aesop as ace”. for ppl who are new to the blog (hello there), im an ace in a romantic relationship, so thats definitely not the reason i dont ship elisop. its more of being in a relationship has largely shaped my views towards romance as a whole. even before i met my boyfriend, i hated the romance genre in stories n media. most of it comes off as incredibly forced, especially those love triangles they seem to love putting into teen novels. thats one reason why i stopped reading when i was younger, but i digress.

did i partake in shipping when i was younger? i did. for a gay ship too (if anyone really wants to know, its kurotsukki from haikyuu. at least this was one that i can remember, i was mostly working on my 20 odd ocs for the longest time). i also used to write little short romance ficlets that i never posted anywhere cos i hated (n still do hate) my writing. but writing romance when u dont have experience was really just a way of projecting n probably a way of coping for myself, not that i knew at that time. but after i actually started a relationship with my boyfriend (whom i love n cherish a lot thank u very much), i began to see how much all these have skewed my views towards romance n have actually done some harm to our relationship. the bullshit that the general media feeds u constantly doesnt help in the slightest either.

quick topic shift to elisop in particular (about time, right?). i already stated that i only ship characters if i sense chemistry between the two personalities, n if u have seen the part where i dont ship elisop then u must have seen how agonized i am over not being able to have a concrete personality for eli. that is the main problem i have with elisop: eli does not feel like a solid character to me. n that is a huge problem, because if he doesnt have any defining characteristics besides being mild n nice, then he can be whoever i want him to be. (i have done this in my exorcist comics, i will admit this. n the fact that i can just do that... it really does not sit well with me personally.)

n that is dangerous.

back to young me doing lil ship things. i think its also pretty safe to say when u really do ship 2 characters, chances are u kinda really relate very very hard to at least one of them. that very quickly can turn into projecting, n shipping therefore is not “exploring the relationship between 2 characters” n it becomes “my preferred dating simulator 101″. of course this isnt always the case, but at least it was for me, n subconsciously it might be for lots of ppl too. n since this is ur mental playground, u call the shots, n there is no consequences if u slightly (or even entirely) alter one or both personalities to fit ur desired narrative. n u wouldnt even notice or know, cos ur blind to ur own biasness.

we bring our perceived notions into real life, im sure u know that. so when ur partner does not become that perfect knight in shining armour, or when they get upset at things that u do (which is a very normal thing by the way), n u think (very subconsciously), That isnt what my otp would do, something is wrong here (nothing is wrong, actually its just ur skewed perception of a stable romantic relationship). why wouldnt ur otp do this? because u are both halves of ur otps, there is no hidden secrets between them (apart from the pining part but thats irrelevant), n again they have been altered to fit ur preferred narrative. 

a real relationship requires a lot of communication between parties, because newsflash, liking someone doesnt mean that u have to like every single thing they do, they will make mistakes n it will hurt u, n guess what, the reverse is also true. if u do go with absoutely anything that they would do with 0 objections whatsoever, ur not crushing on someone, ur idolizing them, n that power imbalance is detrimental to a relationship. these things are not obvious to ppl, especially when the whole climate is hell bent on getting into romantic relationships by a certain age or some bullshit. communication is key n is pretty much the only way to solve relationship issues, because the other person has a lot that u r not seeing n vice versa. as similar as 2 ppl can be, i doubt u can have 100% the same thoughts on all things. i dont make the rules.

so in ur mental playground u focus on the fluffy parts, maybe there is communication, but rarely is there any meaningful conflict. thats unrealistic, n if u bring that mindset to an actual relationship, thats not going to end well. i say meaningful conflict, because yes, generally u shouldnt have conflicts with ur significant other. but inevitably when ur with each other for long enough, u will realize that there are habits that u must change in order to be with the other person. habits that are harmful to the other person directly, or harmful habits towards yourself that indirectly harm the other person. these are meaningful in a sense that if left alone, it will manifest into larger problems that will harm u, the other person n the relationship as a whole. its meaningful to the relationship.

all these is made even worse if ur neurodivergent. maladaptive coping practices, self sabotaging behaviours, inherent disabilities. all these must be adjusted n addressed. im so incredibly thankful for my boyfriend for being incredibly patient with me when working all these out, n it has not been easy for me to work on myself n all my problems, n im still not done working on them. this aspect is often not explored in romance in general (or properly), n there is a very good chance i would have still been stuck in the unhealthy mindset of “this isnt like my otp, maybe we’re not meant to be”. because loving someone is a choice. no one is made for each other, it is a conscious choice made between 2 ppl to make things work. this is how arranged marriages work, i am told, n i do see the appeal, not that it actually does appeal to me culturally.

special mention to the kurotsukki ship, cos from there i found a very, very good fic that explored their relationship before n after getting together, n it actually showed aspects of this problem in the incredibly slow burn of (at that time) 20+ chapters. it was just one fic (n a very good one at that, i believe it was called Leviticus), but it had a lesson i never thought i needed to learn, n learn it i did, with a lot of help from my dear. 

this is also probably the reason why i dont really want to delve too much into romance now. i know its a lot of work, n everything (mostly) that the media feeds u is really false advertising, but ppl eat that shit up n so it remains one of the most popular genres to date. im just very wary that if i do start on a romantic story, i want to be able to show it in a way like that fic did, the truths of relationships, because i dont want to make something that sells, i want to make something that meaningful to me, if a little indulgent. n that also includes being very careful in how the respective characterizations will change in a relationship. almost too careful now that i think about it, but its not something that i mind. i was never one for romance from the start, n now im very careful about shipping because of what happened to me persoanlly.

okay enough about me, lets talk about aesop. in any au u put the character in, the essence of the character must remain despite the change in environment. so lets say we have ur typical modern au. dead mom, check. shitty mentor doing illegal stuff? also check. autistic boy with social anxiety? we’re good to go. all these have implications on aesop as a character, n while ppl are aware of this, again the way they go about portraying it can go, in my personal opinion, very wrong. ppl who immediately woobify aesop completely because he has autism annoy me. ppl who reduce him to uwu soft boi cos he has social anxiety do not know how the disorder really works n as someone who has that i hate it to the core. ppl who do all these for the sake of ship have lost my respect. its insulting.

remember the top/bottom dynamic? not that elisop is completely free from that (even if i dont know much about eli, to put him in either one of those stereotypes feels very insulting to his character. i wont even say anything about doing it to aesop its so upsetting), but its not entirely made up of either. but now i want to introduce another trope i am very wary of, which is “i can fix him”. im sure u guys have seen the meme going around poking fun at this trope (for those who havent, its along the lines of “u can fix him? well i can be his worst nightmare”) n no doubt yall would have seen it n gotten sick of it in some forced hetero romantic bullshit. we have one damsel in distress with a saviour that solves all their problems just by existing n being romo with each other.

remember “my preferred dating simulator 101″? this is not mutually exclusive n from my point of view this is dangerously close to this trope. lets be real, if it was actually a thing that all ur deep rooted trauma magically disappears if someone were to waltz into ur life, we would want it. definitely. no painfully dissecting ur own problems n constantly facing them head on. real life states that this is not the case, but it will not stop us from dreaming. n so this trope is born n lives n will go on.

(finally) pulling aesop n eli into this, at least in my mind, u have one severely traumatized boy with lots of issues n u have this. nice mild guy who can be anything u want him to be. i hope u can see where im going with this, n thats the direction i see some elisop heading towards (i dont read a lot of elisop to be fair). if u came from my eli character talk, i mentioned that it is incredibly one sided. this is exactly what im talking about.

putting it all together in case u havent already, aesop is the damsel in distress, whose problems magically disappear because of elis godly kindness n little to no work on improving himself, n they lived happily n gayly ever after.

can u tell how much that does not appeal to me. 

never mind the butchering of character that inevitably happens somewhere somehow, the unrealistically perfect themes n implications of this trope makes me so viscerally uncomfortable. this is, of course, due to personal reasons, n i definitely see the appeal of this dynamic because i would probably have been interested in this once upon a time as well. but as i am now, with everything i have explained up there n everything i have been through, i would politely rather not.

n its difficult to think of another dynamic, because of how little i know about eli apart from him being this saint, which easily makes him a candidate for being aesops trauma panacea. never mind aesop rarely, if ever, does anything for eli as a character in return, n its so damaging to buy into this rhetoric, where a person like this who would solve all ur issues no strings attached exists somewhere in the world. they really dont. a relationship has to be mutually benefitting, or it will be draining n disastrous. maybe u say, Oh its nice to imagine it once in a while. n yeah, i agree, except once in a while is a little difficult to keep track of n that is sort of what happened to me. id rather stay as far away as possible from this kind of unrealistic fantasy, i just got this shit sorted out with myself n my boyfriend.

i have some other reasons, but theyre more personally problematic, so i wont go into them here. but this is mostly n generally why i do not ship elisop romantically. if u do, u do u, and have fun, but again dont expect me to join u. thank u for coming to my ted talk, this took a lot longer than expected.

[toycarousel]

some advice? Please dont laugh when I say this. I'm transgender, ftm, but I dont like being called transgender, I just want to be called male. But at the same time,I'm african american, and dont want to be an african american male. The very thought scares me to no end and makes me want to not bother with transitioning. My therapist says that my dysmorphia and dysphoria are too conflicting to do anything with, but I dont want to stay as I am. So I'm at an stalemate. Idk what to do next. Advice?

(Disclaimer: I’m not a therapist or any sort of medical professional, so I can only offer my opinions + advice, but if anything feels off to you at all, then totally feel free to ignore it!)

Of course I’m not gonna laugh, Anon, and I don’t get why anyone would -- you’re in a very, very difficult, painful position, and a LOT of therapists aren’t great at figuring out the tentative balance of understanding who a patient is, what a patient needs, what a patient wants, and which steps they need to take with said patient in order to not harm that person... it can definitely take time.  If they’re a good fit for you, they’ll become better at understanding that balance (and also doing their proper research) as they get to know you more, and will offer more helpful options if they’re open-minded about trying a variety of angles instead of just sticking to their little therapy scripts, esp when those scripts don’t always apply neatly to every individual.

I’m not trans (and I’m white), so I could be totally off on a bunch of what I’m about to say (plus everyone’s experiences are different regardless), but I have met a few different people who don’t want to refer to themselves -- or be referred to as -- transgender.  Though their birth assignment doesn’t align with who they are, which fits the definition of “trans”, the term itself just... doesn’t work for them, specifically, and I think I can understand that.  I was born intersex (a person with mixed physical sex characteristics -- many that I didn’t even find out about until much later in life), but I wouldn’t consider that to be a huge part of me, or a defining way to describe my own relationship with gender.  For example, I wouldn’t want to be referred to as “that intersex person”, by other people, unless it was genuinely medically relevant in that moment.

So what I’m personally interpreting from what you’ve written here is that you don’t want the bodily aspect of things to be this constant focus of what your experience in life is, regarding gender.  Since cisgender (and also many intersex men, tbh) get to be referred to as just men, then you should be able to have that same thing, if it feels right for you, imo.  You being what other people would define as “trans” doesn’t make you less of a man regardless, so, ultimately, it’s fair to just want to be referred to as a man, same as all other men.

Wrt to you not wanting to be an African American male due to the terror you feel associated with that specific combo of identities -- well, that sounds incredibly tough for you to be going through, and to try to reconcile! And it’s something I can’t personally imagine (I wish I could help more, so I’ll just offer what I can, but again, if anything sounds off to you, feel free to disregard what I’m saying!) 

I can think of a lot of reasons off the top of my head as to why a person would be terrified to be a black man, but the ones that come to mind for me are things like: having to face an increased risk of police brutality, racism, other stereotypes, other ppl’s expectations as to who you should be -- all those types of wide-reaching social reasons.  But I also don’t know if those reasons are your specific reasons for being terrified of being an African American male, you know? Like on a personal level.  I can take a guess at more specific, internal reasons you might have, but that would be me kinda doing armchair therapy, so I won’t deep-dive there -- however, it’s always a good idea, and appropriate, for you to do some of that intense self-examination, you know? And I’m sure you and your therapist have done a lot of that already, but if you haven’t yet written down your exact reasons for this particular terror, maybe try that out! It’s one of the skills we learn in DBT (and other forms of therapy that I’ve been through).

I’d write out separate pages for each specific thought.  For example, one page listing the reasons/thoughts/emotions as to why you don’t feel comfortable with being labelled as trans (the ways in which it doesn’t apply to you, how you feel when someone does apply it, etc).  And another sheet listing the reasons/thoughts/emotions as to why being an African American man would terrify you, VS just being African American in general.  Again, your reasons for not wanting to be referred to a certain way are totally valid, Anon! These sorts of sheets/journaling exercises are just to help you feel like you have a more solid grasp on where your own emotions are coming from, and to give you something physical to hold onto when you want to explain it in more detail to yourself and your therapist! 

A really, really, really helpful sort of worksheet/mindfulness activity to help us figure out what we’re feeling is this one I also learned in DBT (a form of therapy that is just ridiculously helpful for everyone, imo), and may help with writing out the things I mentioned above.  These are called behaviour chain analysis worksheets, and are usually used to prevent a behaviour that you want to stop engaging in, but what they also ultimately do is help ppl unravel thoughts, emotions -- your primary emotion is especially important to know, because that’s something you can then target with your therapist.  Here’s some info on how to do one: https://www.verywellmind.com/how-to-do-a-chain-analysis-for-problem-behaviors-2797587

And a basic worksheet version (it can rly help to have on-hand, so it can be written down and you can check it out whenever you need to).  https://www.dbtselfhelp.com/html/behavior_chain_analysis.html

Like, for example, say you do one of these sheets to figure out the primary emotion behind bodily dysmorphia.  Say the behaviour was that you snapped at a friend for making a comment about your body, and you want to know why exactly you snapped at them (what about their comment hurt enough to elicit the reaction), and prevent it in the future.  The behaviour chain analysis is a space where you can write down what the behaviour was.  In this example it’d be; “Behaviour: Snapped At Friend”, and then you write down the initial feelings you had associated with it, and the thoughts that went with those feelings.  

Eventually, for example, say that you thought the reason you snapped at them was anger (which is by definition, a secondary emotion -- secondary emotions aren’t less important than primary emotions, but they’re the emotions that happen after primary emotions, sometimes mere seconds after), but when you look at the thoughts you wrote down that you experienced in the moment you snapped at the friend, and dig a little deeper, say it turned out that the primary emotion (the one that happened before the thoughts, and before the secondary emotions) wasn’t anger, but actually shame.

(I’m not saying yours will be shame btw, I just like using shame as an example, because a lot of my own thoughts and feelings and behaviours and inner conflicts are rooted in shame).

So then that gives you something solid to show yourself, but also to bring to your therapist.  Instead of the therapist focusing on only the thoughts and feelings that they’re visibly seeing in you in a session, they now know that you’re struggling with underlying shame, or sorrow, or grief, or disgust, or fear, or whatever the primary emotions end up being for you.  Then the therapist can more easily help you through tackling the dysmorphia, and any unwanted behaviours and thoughts + emotions associated with it.  And being able to tackle one of the things you’re struggling with in the ask you sent me above means that the dysphoria may start to make more sense for you in the same context as the dysmorphia -- and, hopefully, there will eventually be less of a conflict between the two, or at least they’ll be more understandable, even if they’re entirely separate from each other.

Since you’re not yet sure you want to transition due to these very genuine inner conflicts, then, like, I get why your therapist isn’t going ahead with it, but I also don’t want you to have to stagnate with therapy, or be denied the sense of progress, or with generally getting to know yourself either -- I want you to have the opportunity to live a life that feels right for you, but without the various intense fears associated with that! And I know that it’s fully possible, and will likely just take time, and support, and a willingness to unravel some things that... are probably gonna hurt a lot to unravel.  So you should definitely make sure you’re ready to unpack those things and are doing it with a professional you trust; and that you have outside support networks as well (friends, family, whoever is close to you that you can talk to).

Remember that there’s absolutely no time limit on when you can and can’t transition, if you choose to in the future! Plus, there are ways of transitioning that aren’t All The Way, you know? Reversible things you can do (which may have been what you were asking for from the start, ahahaha! My apologies for my wordiness in this response :’)

There are obvs options like binding, packing, etc., that you probably already know about (and know more about than me, tbh).  But you can also try other things out too -- there are certain types of makeup techniques/contouring for a more masculine look, more natural forms of altering hormones (if you feel safe doing so, and your doctor suggests any safe options -- definitely research this one thoroughly ahead of time).  

A legal change of name can also switch up how you feel a whole lot, if you’re ready/able to do so, (and if not, even just asking ppl to refer to you by a name that you choose, or a variety of different names, depending on whether you’re not sure which one fits yet; it’s always okay to change your mind wrt these things).  

Changing your wardrobe drastically can also rly alter how other ppl view and treat you, and I know there are resources online, and many on this site (mainly written by ppl who use the term trans for themselves, but that will hopefully be helpful to you as well), that have clothing swap links, and other suggestions as to more transition-related things you can do to move forward, while also not making any decisions that feel too permanent! Here are some of the links/resources along that vein that I could find:

https://transclothesexchange.tumblr.com/ (clothing exchanges)

https://transguys.com/style/trans-clothing-exchanges (clothing exchanges)

https://thebodyisnotanapology.tumblr.com/post/97564996149/transgender-resources (resources in general, including general body positivity, which could be incredibly helpful during especially dysmorphic and/or dysphoric times!) 

https://advicefromabro.tumblr.com/gi (I think this is an older post, but it mentions an app that will allow you to find a gender-neutral or safe bathroom, if that’s currently a concern for you!)

https://transstudiesarchive.tumblr.com/post/168139537672/transgender-resources-masterpost (looks like this one has some resources for African American people as well, among a variety of races)

https://nonbinary-support.tumblr.com/resources (this one has some links regarding name changes and tips for choosing a name, if that’s something that you’re interested in!)

https://transgenderteensurvivalguide.tumblr.com/post/147789231360/makeup-tips-for-ftm-people (some makeup and skincare tips for men!)

(I hope some of these are helpful for you, Anon! I’m sorry that they use language that doesn’t apply to you, it’s just what came up when I researched these tips -- but I think these are resources that could be helpful for anyone in a similar boat, not strictly trans ppl!)

In any case, whatever you do and don’t do, you can always choose who you are and how you represent yourself.  There are some physical aspects to a body that cannot be changed, or can only be changed with medical intervention, and some aspects of appearance that will always be there (skin colour, etc), but these things don’t define who you are.  I dunno how helpful this will be, but I wanted to also leave you with this; you may have certain body parts, but they aren’t your gender, or the sum of you.  People might assign labels like “trans” to you, but that doesn’t make them right, or you wrong.  You’re African American, but that’s not the sum of you either.  Your race, your gender, these are important aspects of our lives in the sense that they inform our experiences in a lot of ways, but they aren’t Who You Are.  “African American male” may be something a doctor writes on a sheet for you someday, or maybe not, but regardless, it says nothing about you as a person:  

It doesn’t tell anyone what you love, what you dislike, what makes you happy, your hobbies and interests, what you’re good at, what you want to become good at, your dreams, your goals, your personal achievements, those little things in life that make you smile sometimes, your complexities, your favourite colour, a place you’d love to go, a place you already like to go when you want to be alone, or somewhere or something you want to share with a loved one someday, a movie scene that made you cry, whether or not you’re an animal person/want pets (or already have them), your lifelong habits, embarrassing things you did when you were younger, how deeply and wonderfully you affect the people in your life, stories you may have created, your sense of beauty and style, a song or a poem that speaks to you, your sense of humour... all these things are yours.  No matter where you are in life right now, and no matter where you want to be in the future! No one has the right to define you but you -- and no one can take that from you. 

Happy New Year, Anon! And best of wishes~!!! : D

[movedto-tsotc]

Ah personal project because i don’t draw hands enough, these are the hands of everyone in class 3-1 in my oc school (don’t. concern yourself with it it’s just ocs) - i started this after waking up at like 11pm and it’s 11 am now it’s not been a productive day but! tadah! I’ll be talking about each hand more under the cut

Ageishi Terumi -  - chipped nail polish (she tries to be in tune with her femininity but is practicality over presentation meaning she usually forgets to apply it again after it gets damaged) - scars and burns from combat (Terumi has very little regard for her own safety so ends up with a lot of wounds) - misaligned fingers from being broken in the past (see above!)

Ageishi Tokurou -  - That’s a standard hand honestly - He’s Terumi’s twin brother, they’re almost identical honestly but he isn’t as reckless so his hands aren’t as marked up and broken - His skin’s rather rough and calloused, much as his sister’s is Hattori Zenjirou - - Zen takes good care of his skin so it’s rather. clear.  - His hands are rather long too, surprisingly so. They’re also slender.  - He values his nails a lot as a form of self expression, Zen usually dresses in all black (like a stupid emo eboy) so it’s a much needed pop of colour, they tend to be well maintained as a result

Hitotose Ryousei -  - The gems on his hand show that this was drawn in winter. ask me about it if you want i just like the blue.  - His fingers are calloused from pushing himself to his limits every day training, he’s very much a hard worker and keeps his nails maintained to show professionality and control despite this - Ryousei’s hands are delicate but not soft, dainty but not fragile. 

Ikko Endou -  - I’m in love with him, firstly. Endou has large hands to keep u safe and hold urs and make u happy he’s fucking perfect okay - his hands kinda just do that gradient, it’s a result of his blessing, no his nails are not painted though his girlfriend (bi rights) and younger sister (and sometimes his like 10 younger brothers) ask him if they can.  - Endou is STUPIDLY strong yet despite this he’s incredibly gentle and FUCKING MOISTURISES UNLIKE EVERYONE ELSE HERE OH MY GOD YOU GUYS.

Inokuma Ayaka - - she’s pink - she paints her nails because it’s nice - her hands are rather small! unsurprising because she’s 4 foot eleven

Kanematsu Koichiro - - VERY skinny and VERY long. he’s baby - he paints his nails as tribute to his late mother (or rather is made to by his father, sorry buddy), he’d be in his usual lace gloves but I Cannot Draw Those Sorry Chiro - He’s 6′5 and a giant twig it makes sense why his hands are so stupidly long actually but i respect him and his stupidly soft skin

Kanya Lamai -  - She’s usually in long gloves but unlike yuushi and tou they have NO detail so i didn’t think they’d be worth including - Yes, Kanya’s an e-girl. Yes, she gets french manicures shut the fuck up her girlfriend likes them - Again, her hands are soft for her girlfriend, got told that rough housing with her apeshit snake brother makes them uncomfy to hold and she bought 5 bottles of hand lotion to make sure that it didn’t happen again.  Kobayashi Sakura -  - Sakura is a dainty son of a bitch and she WILL make sure her nails are beautiful under her armour. she has armour by the way don’t you think she’s perfect.  - With these claws she makes sure no man is safe when she’s around - The nail polish pattern is the same on the other hand but reversed!!

Lothaire Ludenburg Junior - - Lothaire burnt their middle finger when they were a child but also REALLY likes their nails so went “fuck it let’s cut all my gloves”, it’s high fashion baby! - they are. so fucking pale. im sick of this bitch someone get them some sunlight - yes, their nails are gemstones. yes they’re rich. yes i’m robbing them. also TINEY BABEY HANDS

Narumi Nekomaru -  - you know how ryousei went apeshit training? yeah narumi did that but like ten times harder so tends not to have time to maintain his hands much - his nails are either cut when they get too long or trimmed in combat n shit, he’s not got rough rough hands and they’re always (always) clean but they’re not exactly soft either - that marking? the same as his forehead, it’s a part of his blessing. Also he’s got. small hands bro.  Sasaki Yasu - - that’s not my oc - I’d link you to the page of the person whose oc it is but she won’t give me her tumblr account (and her twt’s private so im not fucking pseuo doxxing her again like i did on rp twt dont ask) - Nikki if you’re out there seeing this or if i sent it to you, suck my dick and also enjoy your con and ALSO ask me about this i miss yasu so much :(

Sawamura Yuushi -  - UNDER THOSE GLOVES ARE TALONS THE ONLY REASON YOU CAN’T SEE THEM IS BECAUSE HE TURNS THEM TO SMOKE BEFORE PUTTING ON THE GLOVES - Yuushi’s a gigantic germaphobe and hates human contact so isn’t ever seen without some form of gloves on whether they’re his leather, everyday gloves, the white cotton ones he uses when maintaining his collection of “fake” “glass” eyes or the other white cotton gloves he uses when obsessively cleaning EVERYTHING  - Yuushi bites at his hands a lot, another reason for the gloves. also he’s 7′4 his hands are so fucking LONG he’s like koichiro but again Shishiuichi Takamitsu - - there’s a moth there - mitsu doesn’t paint his nails - medium hands mcgee over here oo please appreciate my perfect boy i love him so so much okay Tou Fuyuhiko -  - GLOVES MEAN NO FINGERPRINTS - the wings are a reference to the birds that represent Hideki family (which he is essentially a bodyguard for, even at such a young age)  - VERY SMALL HANDS, he’s like 5′2

[leonleonhart]

🤔 vergil for the character thing

Why I like them

Sexy, abandonment issues, the color blue, the way he’s petty when it comes to sharing thingsit’s like he was made for me, but i was cursed to favor dante instead

Why I don’t

He’s killed at least 2,000 people (minimum) as the result of his stupid towersalso he’s a deadbeat dad

Favorite scene

When he’s asking if his and Dante’s fate’s would be different had their positions been reversed during the climax of 5. idk there’s just something really important for me to know he’s matured enough to take a step back and reflect on his actions.

AND (almost forgot) his fucking weak ass attempt at a drinking contest against dante in the first novel 

Favorite season/movie

His original, stuffy ass nose, nasally voiced appearance in DMC3

Favorite line

Might controls everything - and without strength, you cannot protect anything; let alone yourself. (typical, but its a killer quote)

Favorite outfit

his dmc5 DT if that counts, i like the tail

OTP

Vergil/Self-care

Brotp

despite trying to kill each other constantly i think he and dante just fuckin incite chaos

Head Canon

Vergil denying his humanity is what keeps him just a step behind Dante, in order to truly grow and truly heal he needs to accept it. And I think it’s less he denies his humanity and more that it’s the side that causes him the most pain, since its his only lasting connection to his mother considering he never saw her when their home was attacked. AND I think the human part of him that wants to use the power he’s gained to protect rather than rule, trouble is he keeps pushing away anything that he should protect. (kinda fueled by V’s entire existence but it’s stuffi believed before 5)

Also he and dante are geminis with different moons

Unpopular opinion

I’d kill vergil off for good if it meant we got at least ONE MORE character with absolutely NO connection to the sparda bloodline holy SHIT

A wish

Retires when he gets out of hell. Doesn’t even become a devil hunter like dante or nero. just fucking buys a bookshop and lives in peace (away from anywhere where people would be like ‘wait didnt you kill like a million people’)

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen

raise another tower, like ffs vergil

5 words to best describe them

bitchy, prideful, shortsighted, misguided, lonely

My nickname for them

dead idiot [no longer applies]

[sprayingdrips]

Week 7: July 4 - July 10

Its 30 minutes passed midnight on a Monday and week 7 was a lot too.

I worked the entirety 4th of July the weekend plus more days. 

I watched more movies and am in the middle of watching Seven Pounds. But what’s crazy I started a 16 episode K-Drama, 16 hours total this drama has and still have not finished it. I like it but I think I figured what I don’t like about it. I think I have three or four episodes left.

The drama is called Abyss and regardless I do actually like it and will continue watching it. What it don’t like about it are typical things in all stories but its the way it’s played out. The male lead is creepy. Not the best way to put it but he’s on this weird crush land crash where he’s definitely been for a while but he got engaged. Not saying this scenario is not possible but it just... not executed well? Male lead always had a crush on the Prosecutor Go but Go introduced him to his now ex-fiancé. The flashbacks we get of him and the fiancé are that they are so in love but also I lowkey got a marrying for money vibe from her and was not mad about that. I think the way the break up was done was well thought out because it sounded suspicious because why would you say that stuff in that way especially if you were in it for the money. And being truly in it for the money, would me she would have the power to maybe manipulate him into getting plastic surgery because he is so in love with her. An ugly face does not stop the majority from chasing a bag. After all that shit that went down in episode 1 we get “ugly” to “handsome” male lead. And the reverse happens to the cocky female lead (Prosecutor Go) because she was cocky. 

Now there is only so many episodes but they are an hour long each. And as they try to solve crime and hide from a murderer (largely kinda bad at both). The male lead tries to kick it off with Prosecutor Go because his ex fiance is a cheater and liar and he still likes Go. (SHE DID WHAT SHE HAD TO DO. I DONT BLAME HER. ) Which is were the problem lies. A serial killer who is targeting nearly all of yall is on the lose and you still tryna kiss someone who said no. Like she did initiate the first one if I remember correctly but uh idk about continuing it like this. Its some weird forced thing and I just don’t see any chemistry. Maybe if GO’s character was created differently? We mostly get flashbacks about how cocky she is about her looks. I slightly don’t blame her but then it’s more of yeah i’d ignore a group of a bunch of men trying to ask me out everyday. Which makes me wonder how Go and the lead know each other? Like they show them in middle school? together and he knew about a math problem better than her but there’s no explanation to the separation from then to the other flashbacks. Like he’s in the group of men always following her trying to ask her out but then in one episode she's like “nooo i gave you the box of chocolates because I liked you duh. so obvious.” like it really ain’t and the scenario he said is really more believable that hers. The flashbacks line up to what he said. It’s not surprising that Go would get so many boxes of chocolate that she wouldn’t just pass them around for others to have.

Also the lead is..He’s just not smooth about and is so bad at reading the room when its a good idea to do it. Sometimes he does it in front of his ex and it gives off this weird trying to get back at you vibe when it just does not hit because his ex did all of that to protect herself and her mom from a crazy serial killer. Like the serial killer shows up near all of them and he only worries about Go like they’re both so into each other but they’re not. And he does that whole I’m a manly man I protect and it just does not fit him. 

I think most of my problem is that he’s moving on in the weirdest way. Like maybe if went out and partied first instead of having this my-fiance-dumped-me-i-tried-[redacted]-and-say-its-all-of-Go’s-fault-but-I-lived-and-now-im-super-handsome-let-me-try-to-get-back-with-my-fiance-because-something-was-off-about-that-call-and-she-said-she-was-pregs-oh-saw-her-get-hit-buy-a-truck-revived-oh-she-said-where-Go-was-located-and-almost-got-her-killed-im-mad-wtf-and-shes-not-pregs-:(-oh-she-did-all-of-that-bc-of-her-mom-i-guess-ill-help-but-fuck-her-i-still-like-Go??? Can this be a little more healthier please?

Anyways, the plan for this week is to legit stretch everyday. Blender donut or frog. Crochet more clouds. I forgot to mention I crocheted a cloud. I don’t know if I mentioned that last post but I did it on Wednesday during a zoom with my roommates and it was near the end. and make one more palette and post them. my orginal plan was five palettes and post but damn the dishes are still not over. also this collage video idea and more jobs applied to this week than last. Honestly turning in four in one day was a lot with the systems going on.

I have work later today and my first ASL 2 test (bruh already???)

[groundramon]

🔥🔥🔥

Not really an unpopular opinion, but I need to get this out bc it’s been bothering me (and also I can’t think of any better unpopular opinion) - so the other day I decided to check out aggretsuko because I’d heard good things about it and it looked cute and it had a dub so I could easily put it on in the background while I was drawing or doing something else.  At first I quite liked it!  It didn’t spend any time dwelling on the political message I saw a snippet of on my dash, which I didn’t mind but it did surprise me, but overall it was a pure enough show and I have a hearty enough stomach to stand serious issues addressed in a serious/respectful way (ie not saying “haha its funny that women are abused at work”, aggretsuko does like the reverse of that).  I really liked Gori and Washimi, especially Gori bc god I relate to her, and it did off-put me that she was a gorilla with a clearly black-coded voice but honestly I’d rather change her species because I LOVE her voice, it fit her personality/writing so well, but nevertheless I ofc recognize the problematic implications and again that’s why I’d like the species to be changed.  But of course, can’t change what’s already been done, hoped it wasn’t anything too intentional and kept watching.  Gori became my fave character properly, and I think ep 4 was the last ep I watched?  It was where Gori and Washimi get to know Retsuko more, which I thought was really cute!  I was happy she was able to open up about her interests to people at work more too, I thought that was nice character development.  But then there was a scene that just kinda punched me in the face and I haven’t been able to return to the series since.  So Washimi, Gori, and Retsuko are ordering drinks at the karaoke club, Washimi and Gori get alcoholic drinks and Retsuko orders tea (for anxiety reasons, but still).  Gori over the phone tells the waiter to slip some whiskey into her tea.  I get that the point was to get Retsuko into relaxing a bit, but I’m sorry, you do NOT slip anything - LET ALONE ALCOHOL - into someone’s drink or food without permission.  As far as I can tell, Washimi and Gori had no way of knowing if Retsuko drank or not; at least if it was one of Retsuko’s close friends, they knew she drank.  It still wouldn’t be good but it wouldn’t have been as bad.  I know I know, it’s nitpicky, I got just as offended by jokes in fucking Appmon as I did by this joke, but the fact that it was done by a character I really enjoyed and borderline imprinted on…really hurt?  It’s very much a personal thing, not a “if you enjoy Aggretsuko you condone this” thing (I dont play that game but even the little bit that I play of it, this doesn’t apply to), so idc if you still like it and if you do that’s actually FANTASTIC!!  I don’t WANT people to have the same reaction I did, because having this reaction sucks.  I wanted to like this show because I thought it would be some dumb fun but I simply don’t care enough about it to go back after something like this.  The characters were cute but I get just as much enjoyment out of the show looking at posts on tumblr than I do watching it.  I’m a serialized story kind of guy, I don’t do well with comedies, and once a comedy does the opposite of what it’s supposed to do I have a tendency to drop it.

I’ll probably reblog aggretsuko posts here and there because it’s still cute, but I might be done with the series itself because of this.  Again, not shaming anyone who likes it, not even asking anyone to approach it critically.  Please, ignore that one shitty joke and enjoy it otherwise.  It deserves to be enjoyed and you deserve to enjoy it.  I just…can’t.  I saw a character I imprinted on doing something that goes heavily against my morals for the sake of a joke and I’m too stubborn of a person to try again when something like that happens.  (Note that if it was something they were reprimanded for or it was part of the story and taken seriously, it would’ve been different.  But this was a joke, an offensive joke at the expense of “different” people, and I watched Aggretsuko because I thought it didn’t have any of that.)

I’ll give ya two short, actual opinions that idk if they’re unpopular or not but you can have them anyways since you sent me three fires and also this is more of a rant than an opinion: I tend to find that people avoid communication too much and we should make a greater attempt at asking people “how do you feel?” because even people who say “yeah, tell me whatever if there’s a problem!” tend to avoid talking about it if they can, and boysenberry/blackberry frozen yogurt is fucking valid as fuck and you’re all cowards if you disagree

[coolgirl]

💖🌹 about/byf for mobile 🌹💖

desktop version

icon credit / moomin icon / jayroy icon

don’t follow / block me if

you know the roll. believe in reverse oppression, identify with terf rhetoric, believe in monosexual privilege, etc

you’re an adult and produce or/and support content sexualizing minors 

you ship/don’t see the problem with shipping any incestual / pedophilic / abusive pairings

you’re friends / follow or interact with any of these blogs (if you want to know why, you can ask me off anon about it)

consider reading this post before following, especially if you’re in the dc/sw fandom. (mind the trigger warnings).

byf tag

About

Julieta, she/her, 20, latina from argentina. Exclusionist.

main fandoms: comics, music, videogames, aesthetic

blacklist: nsfw / csa / child death / body horror / gore / drugs / goblins / nuclear war related posts (ik kinda odd but pls tag) / thanos / terra from the 80s teen titans comics / Stevesharon

links:  twitter / pinterest / archiveofourown

original content: icons / edits

+blogs: 

🏐 anime sideblog: @kaminaris 🏐

🦋 kpop sideblog: @lovee4eva 🦋

🎨 references/resources sideblog: @pcisonivy 🎨

🏳️‍🌈 jason blog: @dailyjasontodd 🏳️‍🌈

other fansites: batfamilydaily​ / latinxheroes / dc-vertigo / dailystephaniebrown

you can tag me on anything, i track userjulieta if you want me to reblog edits / gifsets / etc.

i try to reply every ask i get, but sometimes it gets overwhelming so i forget to reply. feel free to shoot a second ask if you think i might have forgotten to answer or if you want to make sure i received it. it doesn’t bother me at all. i also don’t mind people contacting me via instant message so if you want to you can hmu there too.

faq

where do you download comics?

comixology is a great place to start to buy them, but if you don’t have the $$$ to do so heres a bunch of websites

readcomicsonline

readcomiconline

getcomics

where can i start reading [character]

dc

Jason Todd

Connor Hawke

Poison Ivy

Duke Thomas

Stephanie Brown

Cassandra Cain

Kate Kane

Stephanie Brown & Cassandra Cain Interactions

Kyle and Jason

Harley & Ivy

Billy Kaplan

why did you unfollow?

probably because of something that applies to my byf [above lol], you don’t tag stuff i have blacklisted (for example, nsfw stuff), are like way younger than me (15 and under), or u were simply just annoying/had a popular post that annoyed me.

why do you hate/dislike/etc tim and dick?

joke joke its not that deep i just dont. i wont like start shit bc u like them or anything just like im gonna mind my business its not.. that deep for reals. 

where did you get your theme / psd / update tab / etc?

here my credit page in case i’m still using, and here on my reference blog i try to always reblog anything i use on my main/edits/etc.

fic recs?

Jason Centered Masterpost |  fics tag

feel free to ask me to tag something you have on your blacklist

answered questions / faq tag

[sassyhottubstrawberry-blog]

Can I cash in my $10,000 dollar whole life insurance policy and how much would I get?

"Can I cash in my $10,000 dollar whole life insurance policy and how much would I get?

I got it when I was 15 years old and I'm 65 now so I've had it 50 years and its all paid up.

BEST ANSWER:  Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://freeinsurancequotes.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr 

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""If i get a speeding ticket, will i receive a notice from insurance?

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Will my insurance provider penalise me for doing this...?

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Cheapest car insurance in ontario?

Cheapest car insurance in ontario?

Life Insurance for a 40 Year Old?

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Car Insurance Payments?

Is the car insurance still in act even if I don't pay for it on the day the payment is due, or does the insurance stop and resume until I pay for it? And, if I don't pay the car insurance on time, will they charge me until I pay them?""

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Affordable Health Insurance for small business owner?

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My auto insurance company called me yesterday asking for the names and birthdays of my children. I refused to tell them anything. My oldest son will turn 16 in November, and I was not planning on adding him as a driver, because we have full coverage insurance and I thought that would cover anyone.""

Instead of buying auto insurance is there a way to just have a savings account just for $coverages?

So all US states require all cars on the road to have insurance ... since insurance is just dollars put asside for release in the event of emergencies or other pre-determined event ... why cant I just put $100,000 into a bank account and call it my auto liability account and have my car insured with the state under my name providing that I don't touch those funds?""

Car insurance / ownership question?

Right now I live with my parents, we have 3 cars and there are 3 drivers. All of the cars are in my parents name. One of the cars is a total beater and was given to me as my own car, but we never bothered changing the ownership over because we didn't think it would live very long. Now, I'm getting married and moving in with my husband. I'd love to take 'my' car with me but to transfer it to my name would cost a fortune in repairs as it wont pass the safety as it is. It's not a bad car, but things like the parking break don't work and the suspension is awful and I know if I take it in to get the safety done they'll give me 7 days to do several thousand dollars of pointless repairs or scrap my car. My question is can I continue to drive this car while it is under my parents name? I will be living at a different adress from them also. I'm currently also under there insurance policy as a registered driver on this car. Can I continue paying the policy to continue to be an insured driver while living at a different address? If anyone's had a similar situation or is in the insurance business please let me know! I'm stressing out about potentially having to junk a car that drives perfectly fine due to politics. I live in Ontario Canada.""

""If u destroyed a $5000 car, on average how much would ur insurance company give you back?""

If u destroyed a $5000 car, on average how much would ur insurance company give you back?""

How much is it to get car insurance at 16?

How much is it to get car insurance at 16?

""Car insurance, where should I get it, and how much will it be? College Student?""

I am going to be getting a used 2006 Chevy Cobalt, my parents are gonna pay the monthly payments but I have to pay insurance on it. Do I have to get full coverage on it since its payments? I go to Michigan State so I'm wondering where the cheapest place to go would be. Anywhere that gives student discounts would be great. How much should I expect to pay a month/year?""

Good car insurance rate?

Is $400/annually for 1 way car insurance a good deal? I an with triple a, and drive a 94 Honda accord 1 way policy. Ive been with them for a couple years now bcuz they got towing in my policy. Just wondering is this a good price? as my policy renewal deadline is near.?""

Car insurance at 17. help needed?

Am 17 and just passed my test :), I was looking at the three following cars: - Renault Clio (1.2) - Vauxhall Corsa (1.2) - Peugeot 206 (1.1) All post 2000 pre 2003. Which insurance company is cheapest at my age and can anyone give me rough evaluations on how much it cost them/ would cost? Thanks.""

Do you need auto insurance to ride and motorcycle insurance to ride a motorcycle?

Ok i have a couple questions But first off all im 15 1/2 (all ready have motorcycle and car permit) 1) when i get my license do i have to buy auto insurance to have motorcycle insurance, Because my dad said to have your license and to ONLY drive a motorcycle you need both insurances. (even if i dont drive a car) 2) do i need to have motorcycle insurance to drive a motorcycle with a permit? (since you dont need car insurance for driving with a permit) Thank you!""

What is the cheapest car to insure for a 17 year old?

me and my Dad would like to know how much car insurance would be for a 17 year old and what would be the cheapest car. Now... I know theres no such thing as cheap car insurance but here's the details... I have already been on the road for a year (moped) I am doing my test in July (I'm not 17 yet but we just want some rough estimates) I will be insured on my dads insurance as a second driver (It's not fraud, its perfectly legal because its an option on most car insurance websites) Thanks so much for the help, George.""

Do life insurance companies check your medical records after you die?

Let's say that you get life insurance and claim to be a non-smoker. Then let's say that you start smoking or resume smoking. Assuming that your medical records show that you smoked, will most life insurance companies check your records, see that you smoked, and then cancel your benefit?""

Can my mom insure my car she does not own (California)?

So I am 21 and have a car with a learners permit and I wont get a license until Jan. Can my mom insure the car even though her name is not on the registration until I get my license and will then be the primary driver? In this case I would only be driving with her under the learners permit guidelines. My mom would be driving the car on a daily basis to take my little sister to school and stuff because right now it's our family's only car. In Jan. I would have the insurance put under my name and have her added as a driver.

Insurance company denies the damages?

my car has been involved in an rear end crash and the insurance company of the other party denies some of the damages , that are actually done because of the accident. the auto body shop gave me an estimate of 4 to 5 000 $ . my car doesnot cost that much . the insurance company is offering only 633 $ and disagrees with me to total the car . there was no damage prior to the accident made to the car on the rear end side. they argue that the other car that hit me does not have even a dent then how come my car have this much damages. i know that my car did not had n e damage on the rear before the accidednt. based on the automobile source they think that the actual cash value of the car is 1900 , and they have didcted all other damges , that are not because of an accident. please guide me what i should do in this case.""

What do I need to apply for an individual health insurance?

what do I need to apply for an individual health insurance? Which one do you have? I don't know too much about it, I just need an insurance that can cover a family doctor and that can cover exams like blood test, prescriptions in case I need""

My car insurance policy was cancelled due to non payment can my vehicle be towed?

i found myself in a tight position and was unable to pay my car insurance and it was cancelled i curently have no insurance ...can my vehicle be towed?

Motorcycle insurance cost for m1?

16, live in canada, suzuki gs550, cheapest insurance? p.s. heard statefarm lets you do it by month, how much would that cost?""

How much would health insurance cost for me?

I am 22 years old, I am completely healthy, I am a girl, and I live in Kansas City, KS. How much would health insurance, on average, cost for me?""

How much on average do you pay for auto insurance?

My mother is kicking me off her auto insurance and i can't get an online quote because she also took my car away but says i still need insurance to drive any car. She lies sometimes so idk what average insurance cost and idk how to get it without having a car to put it under?

CAR INSURANCE?!?!?!?!?!?!?

well my older brother is going to go on my dads insurance on his own car. It comes to 100 a month. i was wondering if i can also go on the insurance, and if it would cost any more for me to do so. And please say if there is any other policy i an go o where me and my brother can go onto my fathers insruance.""

Can I cash in my $10,000 dollar whole life insurance policy and how much would I get?

I got it when I was 15 years old and I'm 65 now so I've had it 50 years and its all paid up.

Does anyone know of good Health Insurance?

I have Blue Cross HMO, and it really hasnt worked for me. I need surgery on my knee and i've been waiting for 2 months to get it done, thanks to the fact that my insurance requires me to see a general doctor first (who makes u wait for like a month for an appt for a simple referral) then get another appointment for a specialist (wait another month) then wait 3 weeks again for an MRI, and now i have to wait another week and a half for surgery. Please, help me find a good insurance. I'm tired of this! I live in southern california if that helps. Thanks""

Insurance for a street bike?

how much is insurance for a street bike starting out

What are some car insurance people?

I know Progressive, and Geico. Who do you use? who do you not use and why? We just got a new toyota Sienna and i want to shop around for cheap insurance.""

Pagani Zonda - how much to insure?

My hubby and I were watching Top Gear the other night and James May was testing the Pagani Zonda. Does anyone know, out of interest (or to be honest to settle an argument!) roughly how much the insurance premium would be on this type of car? Thanks!""

About a car and insurance?

ok so im 17 goin to turn 18 this decmber and i want to get a this nice car a 1987 Pontiac Fiero and i want to know what would the insurance on it would be

How will my car insurance change now that i am married?

Hi, I just got married. I am 30 and she is 23. I pay about $76 a month on my car , she pays about $125 and both are full coverage. Mine is with Geico and hers is with some other company. I will get a quote in a few days, but I was just interested, as to what our insurance rate will be when we combine, probably with Geico. Is hers going to make it very high or what can I expect. Thanks.""

Home content insurance?

I am new to the UK. In Japan, few people buy home content insurance because home contents are normally not valuable. It seems to me most people here buy home content insurance. It sounds not attractive a)the premium b)the high excess. What is your view?""

How much is the cost one day car insurance?

How much is the cost one day car insurance?

Car Insurance?

What is the best car insurance for someone who is 18 a good insurance that dosent cost that much

How much would my insurance be is I have 4 points against my license?

I gotten 2 speeding tickets within 6 months (4 points in south carolina...I have a good reason to be speeding!)...I am currently uninsured but my vehicle (2000 Honda CR-V) is insured under my mom's insurance with Geico... I'm 19 years old and soon I will have to register my own vehicle and get insured...my mom doesn't know that I have tickets. I go to college and I'm a pretty good student (4.0) would I get a discount with that? Also, what is the cheapest insurance? Thanks!""

""Can you help me-insurance, cars, and money?""

Okay, I'm planning on buying a car soon. My family is in a very deep hole financially, so I'm going to ask my grandparents to help me, because they are doing fine. I need a car to get to school, get to my current job on time, and have another job (along with 2 AP classes and babysitting!) I never ask them for anything, not that I've ever wanted to, so I'm really scared to ask them for this huge favor. I'm planning on paying them back for every single penny I borrow plus interest. So I want to know an idea of how much money I'm going to need to borrow. Okay, for insurance...I'm planning on buying a toyota yaris, matrix, or camry. Or a honda civic (perferrably hatchback). Or a volkswagon beetle. But right now, anything will do as long as its reliable. For a 16 year old, A average grades, living in KY, about how much would monthly insurance be? For payments, I know about 2000 for down would be good. But how much (about) would interest be on monthly payments? I'm planning on finding a car that is about 7000-8000 dollars. And lastly, how should I ask!? They know I'm mature and responsible, but I don't think they are willing to help me out. I absolutely hate asking for things from people, but I really need help so that I can help my family. So how should I do it? Thank you so much! :) I'll choose best answer!!!""

Is it a good idea to combine my car insurance with home owners insurance?

With Farmers Insurance? Is there a catch to it, since it sounds too good to be true. My old policy is only liability and covers around $15,000 per accidents, (monthly is $43.00). The new policy covers 100,000 per accidents and up to 300,000 (Monthly is $45.00). I was told there is a discount for the homeowners insurance too if i add all the cars in (3). And only saved $100. But with all the car insurance Were paying for, am i really saving anything?? I am confused??""

Home insurance?

i live in southern california and my home value is 600,000. I pay 2,200 for insurance every 6 months. i think this is a little too high but would like to know if this is average. When i bought the house i was too excited that i didnt even talked to my insurance agent, who is located in Fresno, Ca. I do live near a school could that also be the reason why my home insurance is so high? Could the location make any different? Can i also change insurance or will there be a penalty? I have no clue? My insurance is through Farmer. thanks in advance!!!!!""

How much does a hyundai sonata usually cost to insure in MA?

My sister is trying to buy a used 2006 hyundai sonata and we were wondering how much a month it usually costs to insure it? She's only 21 and has had her license for four years without an accident? She tried to get a quote from gieco but they only showed the six month plan. Any helpful information about the car or insurance would be greatly appreciated!

How much is motorcycle insurance for a minor in Maryland?

I'm 17 and am looking to get a motorcycle sometime this summer i have experience ridding. i was looking at a ninja250 ninja500 gs500 a gsxr600 cbr600 and an r6 if you can give me at least a rough estimate of the cost or suggest other bike that would be great

Where i can get car insurance groups explain?

Where i can get car insurance groups explain?

Can my mom insure my vehicle?

I want to buy a newly used car and i will have a loan on it. I wanted to know if the loan and the title are all in my name, would my mom be able to insure it in her name and me just as a driver? im under 25 so my insurance would be extra high. and would i have to register it in her name at DMV to let her insure it?""

Neighbors tree fell on my house and 3 of my cars whos insurance has 2 pay?

during a bad storm my neigbors tree fell over and landed on 3 of my cars and my house i was wonderin whos insurance has 2 pay? mine or the neighbors?

Insurance then registration? or Registration and then insurance?

Buying a used car privately, Gonna work on it for a bit to get it up and running, Wanna know if you buy insurance and then get it registered or get it registered and then buy insurance. Oh by the way, do I get it saftied and e-tested after I get it registered? or what's the order plaese help.""

What car insurance is the best?

Ive seen plenty of ads all claiming they are the best, but which one is the best? Please do not speak about an insurance company if you don't have experience with that company.""

""What are all the expenses in owning your own SEMI TRUCK plus Trailer? I mean stuff like insurance, plates,?""

I mean stuff like insurance, plates, registration, gas, taxes? On average how much do these costs run? Please name all of them and how much they usually run. Details please, Thanks !""

How much should i get for insurance repairs?

I have a 98 pontiac grand prix gtp and it was keyed all over every part of the car. The side mirror was broke off. The key marks are all the way down to primer. My deductable is 200. How much should i expect to get to cover the damages?

Blue Cross/Shield health insurance?

Is this Insurance corporation a good one or a bad one to have as a health care plan?

What is the best Dental Insurance for North Carolina??

I need to purchase dental insurance for myself because I know I need to go get a cleaning etc. What is the most affordable insurance to purchase that covers the most & gives me options on which dentist I would like to go to? I know I have atleast one cavity so I need insurance that won't break the bank but will keep my teeth looking good. Thank you in advance!! Easy 10 points for best answer!!

Car Insurance in the UK?

When your car insurance expires are you no longer covered or do insurance companies keep the policy going until you cancel the cover?

Can I cash in my $10,000 dollar whole life insurance policy and how much would I get?

I got it when I was 15 years old and I'm 65 now so I've had it 50 years and its all paid up.

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