#the vibe of these two alone is very 'be gay do drugs hail satan'

[bardnuts]

Going as long as possible with only Astarion, Day 1

(Durge) Woke up on the beach. Shadowheart is not there. Wander in a confused, vaguely bloodthirsty haze for a few hours. Almost get shit rocked by a pair of intellect devourers.

> Find a lute in a barrel. Reconsider this whole "sorcerer" thing.

> Critically fail at picking open those dusty ancient doors in the cliffside. Break thieves' tools. Give up. Kick sand.

> Sneak past intellect devourers (don't you feel good about yourself?)

> Encounter an ... elf. You think. He asks you to kill one of those brain things like you killed the others. You did not kill the others. This guy is a chump. "Easily," you say, "Stand back."

> Fail perception check

> Turns out the elf is as bad at living as you are. you give him a nosebleed. turns out he has brainworms too.

> For some reason you decide to stick together and look for a healer

> Discover pinned mind flayer. Smash its brains in. Make camp for the night

> Oh no it's just you and this stranger who pulled a knife on you

> The stranger who pulled a knife on you offers to take first watch

> Because you are an idiot, you agree

> Have lovely dreams about pulling out intestines and hanging them up around the camp like party streamers

> oh you're a little bit fucked up aren't you

> in the morning the stranger mentions that you don't seem to have slept well, and were shaking and convulsing all night

> "thanks for taking the watch," you say, deflecting

> "My pleasure. I thought you might be afraid I was a murderer."

> "Not at all," you say. "What are the chances of two murderers in one camp?"

> ha, he says

> ha ha, you say

> strained smiles

> neither of you are sleeping ever again