#the music thing in class did happen to me and because im not 'allison mf reynolds' i did in fact die of mortification

[thespineoftherighteous]

foxes being college kids

while the mob wars and sports and whatnot are absolutely delicious, there isn’t nearly enough regular college life shit in the books so i’d like to offer the following to make up for it:

aaron having a total dick of a professor and he finds out that dan had him as well and they just bitch out over him together

it’s a new semester and matt has never been in this building before and he cant find his classroom and turns out he’s on the wrong side of campus

instead of trying to make it to his class, he just says fuck it and spends the hour playing with, Luca, the therapy dog he found in that building

nicky telling neil about some 'shortcut' in one of the buildings and they end up getting locked in a stairwell and have to call one of the others to get them out

half of the foxes beefing with the other athletes of the school

(like neil, kevin and allison for some reason all have an ongoing rivalry with the soccer players and it is not made better by the fact that neil and kevin both have better footwork than most of them. someone once asked neil if he was "that one redheaded player on the school soccer team" and he just reeled back in horror)

certain foxes catching each other in a lounge or the library before class and then convincing each other to hang out and not go to class

nicky saying that he's dropping out like six times a week

matt and neil joking about the group of kids doing yoga on the grass before they notice renee in the back of the group and tease her about it later (Matt joins her the following week)

Andrew knowing where every single vending machine on campus is

Nicky finding a Quizlet with all the answers for his take home exam and nearly crying out of delight

kevin accidentally locking his phone in those charging station/locker things and fighting with it aggressively before having to go ask for help

neil having beef with the school mascot

hanging out in empty classrooms and getting chased out by the same angry, ancient janitor who seems to be out for all of them

aaron immediately dropping any class if the professor says that they can’t take notes on their laptops

aaron being that kid who watches shows under the pretense of taking notes on his laptop

(only in the classes he doesn’t particularly care for, mind you)

nicky taking an intro level psych course but using it as a qualification to gravely psychoanalyze the foxes

he also declares himself Betsy’s protegee...and then never took another psych class again

(*literally any of the foxes*: does something wrong or random. Nicky: if you want my professional opinion, this sort of behavior is usually a result of buried or unacknowledged trauma. the foxes: .... nooo..." or or or *after a game* Nicky: Neil your pupils are dilated and I hate to tell you this but that's usually a tell of lust or desire and I'm flattered, really, but I'm a taken man and also you're dating my cousin so I don't think it'll work out. Neil: Nicky I'm concussed.)

renee being well known around the school without knowing it and mostly she's seen as some pastel- colored ethereal being because those are the vibes she gives off but also, legend has it that if you pass by or catch a glimpse of Renee Walker before an exam it'll bring you good luck

matt sitting in class for half an hour before realizing that he's in the wrong place and has never taken an anthro course in his life

andrew quizzing Kevin on flashcards when they're the only two left awake and Kevin doesn't mention the pint of Ben and Jerry's Andrew is slowly working his way through

their conversations developing into more when Andrew starts making comments about some of the topics and Kevin responds half earnestly, half exasperatedly

dan changing her major (or at least debating changing her major) like twice a week

andrew being that son of a bitch who seemingly doesn’t pay attention at all (dude doesn’t even bring a bag to class) and teachers try to trip him up by asking questions but he always knows what’s going on

neil having one (1) notebook and one (1) pen that he uses all semester. which is good, which is fine but my guy still lugs a massive backpack around and when the others ask him wtf is in it he just pulls out all this random shit including but not limited to: three different flavors of gum, two exy balls, an assortment of snacks, an extra pair of trainers and a travel neck pillow

renee regularly getting free drinks from starbucks because the barista is smitten by her

Matt paying for a chegg account and the others find out and suddenly everyone is using it

neil knowing where all the best food vendors around campus are (courtesy of his runs)

Allison one time scrolling on her phone in class and clicking on a video and music starts blaring out (if she was anyone other than allison mf reynolds she would have been mortified...though dan still did find her banging her head repeatedly against the table later)

aaron literally not knowing how to find a book in the library but he hates talking to librarians so he will sit in the same aisle for half an hour seething cause "i know you're around here somewhere you motherfucker". (Matt has witnessed Aaron come home cursing Dewey and his decimal system many, many times)

the upperclassmen handing down books for core classes to the monsters so they don’t have to buy them cause that shit expensive and for what (k they might be covered by their scholarships but whatever)

the foxes are all oblivious to this but I feel like the whole student body has all these conspiracy theories or even just rumors running about the exy team, not just because of the news articles linking them to the yakuza or because they somehow went from last to first in their league, but because they've each built a reputation for themselves among the students (whether it's Kevin being known as the one who starts arguments with the teachers that they can't win or Neil for telling the mascot to square up in the middle of the courtyard or Andrew for just appearing out of nowhere all over campus like a blond groundhog) and they all just contribute to the mystery that is palmetto state university's exy team