#the joy of unambiguously Black features!

[master-of-the-elements]

I was NOT expecting this post to gain the traction that it did but I’m glad he and his features are being appreciated. I just want to add that I saw people in the tags point out his lips as well and just wanted to say I 100% agree. I also agree with @creatingblackcharacters that his features aren’t always captured in the fan art well and hopefully artists will see this post and step their game up from now on 🙃

Everyone (me included) understandably and rightfully gawks at Davrin’s chest. However, my favorite body part of Davrin is his nose! I have no other way to describe it other than that it’s so unapologetically black! I don’t see it being appreciated like it should be, so I wanted to do it in case no one else does. Ugh I love it! 😩😭

[frightfurtabby]

HimiKiyo Week 2021 Day 4: I Am Not Your Queen

// Mastermind Kiyo AU for day 4! Because that’s a pretty good reason to be enemies. Could things be different? It’ll take a while for these two to figure out.

Word Count: 2848

Links-

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/34159447

Amino: (coming soon)

“That’s right. If all other alibis check out…” Shuichi said, hand on his chin. This was the final class trial, everyone’s fate hinged directly on what was going to happen next. It depended on the case they’ve built up so far being absolutely correct. One irrefutable accusation and the mastermind’s entire game was crumbling to pieces like a house of cards. “Then there can only be one person that was behind the lies that killed Kaede, Rantaro, and all our other friends.” 

His finger pointed across and to his left, at the person standing between Tsumugi and Maki at their trial bench. “Korekiyo Shinguji, you’re the real mastermind behind the killing game!”

The detective's words echoed throughout the room, bouncing off the walls. Himiko, in spite of how many times others called her “slow” grew increasingly silent as the discussion kept going back to them and their actions from earlier. They had been outed as a serial killer in a previous trial but in spite of everything they helped Himiko at her lowest point immediately after what had happened with Angie and Tenko. 

She remembered crying on Kiyo’s shoulder, listening to their soothing voice put her at ease, advice like a wise sage being passed down. Each and every time she needed it, she would go to that anthropology lab. Each time her footsteps took her in, her feelings only grew stronger. Her first kiss was in there, with them. Before what happened there was a pull she felt, but she never got much of a chance to get close with how intimidating they came off as.

Kiyo, who was now replying calmly as though none of it was bothering them. This was how it started in the other trial too, So that should be reassuring right? 

“Yes, it was me.” they said, “I just so happened to pick up my own after noticing Kaede had taken one with help from my nanokumas.”

Oh. 

Oh no.

And now it felt like the world was crumbling again. Only instead of feeling deflated and alone she was enraged. Enraged that the case against Kiyo didn’t have any holes in it. How could it be true? And now just admitting to it?

“Was all of that… was all of it a lie Kiyo?” she begged that what they had was real. Even now standing across from them as enemies. 

“No. I’ve been up front with you this whole time. There were simply parts of the story you weren’t ready to know. And you still… aren’t ready yet.”

“But you- but you-” words escaped the Mage, leaving her unable to think calmly and properly. “You could have stopped this at any point, but you kept going.” She didn’t even notice they felt a tinge of fear underneath the words she was replying to.

“Why assume I have enough control to end it early, that would be going far off-script.” A small bead of sweat formed which the killer wiped away. 

Wait… off script? What did something like that even mean?

Himiko turned to notice that Maki was giving them a death glare. “Because you’re the mastermind, obviously.”

“Oh, I see. In that case… no, I wasn’t working alone to do this.” they began to explain. “This wouldn’t have been possible without Team Danganronpa and all the fans watching right this very minute!”

“T-Team… D-Danganronpa?” Tsumugi stuttered in shock.  

“Yes, the studio that put together the killing game with me on the ground so to speak to act on their behalf. We are not actually the only ones left alive, there are more humans alive than any other time in history and millions upon millions of them tune into this program.“

“The world is… fine?” Kiibo pondered. The revelation made him tense about what his inner voice may be.

“Why would the world want a killing game?”

Kiyo responded “It works as a kind of release valve, I suppose. Conflicts have dwindled over the existence and increasing popularity of this show after all.”

“Can we… Can we go home? Kiyo please, let me go, let *us* go. You can do that right?”

“Even though it is not destroyed, you still cannot.” The other voice came from Korekiyo once more. Sister was back in action. Sternly she looked over each of the remaining survivors. As though she was looking down on them.

Himiko glared at her from under her hat. “You again.” While she was feeling so complicated about Korekiyo right now, she unambiguously disliked their “Sister”. Then it hit her. Maybe if the Sister personality was the one that was the one really in charge she could forgive them… maybe.

It would take a lot after something as horrible as this. Especially since Maki and Shuichi swore to never forgive the mastermind, she was certain that she wouldn’t either. Even if Kiyo was just a lackey it would take time to trust again.

“I’m pleased you’ve all made it this far.” Sister said, sounding incredibly pleased with herself, rather than anything they’d accomplished. “I wasn’t sure you had it in you. I’d like you all to meet the fans.” 

The blush bear sweated, making the cartoon ‘awooga’ sound like a character seeing an attractive person. “Yes ma’am.”

Futuristic gears spun in front of Monokuma, bringing a keyhole to in front of him, he stuck the key in and several screens proceeded to descend. Faces appeared: Asian, white, black, men, women, even children. Various expressions across their features. None of them stayed long enough for any witness to recognize, even if they remembered anyone they had known.

“These are the fans of Danganronpa.” Sister explained. “Danganronpa is their collective favorite show. The 53rd season has been one of the most successful in years.

The discussion was halted. It was surreal, more so than even waking up here originally was. All of those people had been watching the whole time. 

Himiko asked “So the fans they saw… everything?” Did they know who the mastermind was?”

“I presume some of them did, but this reveal is equally for their benefit. There’s a vibrant debate each season about who the mastermind is and how they did it. Occasionally spoilers will get leaked.”

“So this… was the killing real?” Tsumugi’s voice wavered as she tried to speak up.

“Yes, that part was real. The people playing those eliminated characters are gone from this world as well as the real one.” Sister took off Kiyo’s hat and put it across their chest looking solemn. “They knew there was a strong chance of that, and signed up like many other fans before them.”

“Was it you or Korekiyo who committed Rantaro’s murder?” Shuichi prodded. The shock was wearing off. The trial was continuing at last in the wake of 2 extremely unnerving revelations.

“I feel like that’s a question dear Korekiyo should give the answer to.” Their shared body pulled up the mask and Kiyo began to speak again 

“It was as I said many times, I’m only meant to be an observer. I… admittedly broke that role when I chose to do what I did. I even apologized to them, to myself for it.”

“Then why, surely you must have had a reason.” Shuichi prodded. 

“Regrettably for my ethnography, our class that should have been in a completely fresh, sealed environment was muddied when I did it. Sometimes what I want comes into conflict with a higher power and they were banking on Rantaro Amami’s death being the hook for the episode.”

“So then Kaede’s shot put ball really missed…then why didn’t you kill all of us when we got the answer wrong? Simply f--for Television ratings?”

“I’m afraid the answer to that is yes. That is why everyone survived the sham trial. The fans would have completely revolted.”

“But maybe we’d be spared this revolting game continuing. Do you understand all of this is wrong?” Maki shot at them. 

“Those are quite the harsh words from a professional killer. Though… maybe I shouldn’t say that, your backstory is fake after all.”

“So then… I didn’t spend all that time…” Maki muttered. That wouldn't stop all of it from feeling deeply real. 

“No you did not. That is part of the Ultimate Real Fiction.” Kiyo explained. “It was put into your mind by the flashback lights, as Shuichi deduced. All of our lives were.”

“Being fundamentally changed into a completely different person with a completely different life… what kind of cruel person would force someone to-” Maki

“Forced to?” Kiyo asked quizzically. “No, I can assure you every one of you wanted this. Team Danganronpa takes all of your input very seriously.”

“Our… input?” Himiko asked.

Kiyo clapped their hands together. “Of course. Now I shall show you!”

The screen cut away from the faces of the fans and to some kind of tape. Shuichi Saihara stood in front of the camera. He spoke about how he loved Danganronpa and wanted to be a detective character.

He finished with “ And I’d do anything to be in danganronpa. I will come up with the best, most gruesome murders. Everyone would love it! And, a detective character hasn’t been the blackened yet, so I’m sure I could do that. I’m even thinking about the perfect punishment… for the ultimate detective.”

His glee was evident. Someone so against the killing right now had been one of the biggest fans ever, with a Junko like joy in thinking about how he would be punished as the culprit. It really was like before coming here he wasn’t the same person.

They even went so far as to play Kaede and Kaito’s revealing in part they had said things like “I don’t have any faith in humanity” and “I’m going to kill everyone and win.” respectively. 

“So you see… none of us were the same. If you like how you are now then you may stay perhaps? Finish the fight of hope against despair. Or we, as friends, could all stay here?”

“No, we won’t do that.” Shuichi said, pointing dramatically. “Right guys? The only way to get through and win this. It’s to reject hope and despair. The very premise of Danganronpa.”

It was put up to a vote. Before that, the outside world had tried to argue Hope or Despair, reinforcing the choice. But the cast continued to refuse. 

“We’ll end this with our own hands!” 

It came and went. And… Everybody abstained.?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kiibo flew out of the trial room, determined to end the entire killing game now no matter the cost. Everyone would finally be free. All he needed was to finish off this prison school with his upgrades. Rocket boosters made it easy to fly to the next part to blow up.

Down below him, the remaining survivors stood in the courtyard. Kiyo had stopped right before outside. Himiko stopped as soon as she noticed they weren’t running like the others. And those three stopped everything because their friend was endangering herself.

She approached them, which caused a curious head tilt. They had been waving before that moment. It should have been goodbye forever.

“I can’t… let it end like this. It shouldn’t end with you dying like Junko.” 

“Why not? Do you not doubt my feelings? I’m just playing my part after all.”

“Your part, look… about that, listen.”

“And what a grand p-” It seemed like they wanted their final words to be some grandiose speech. 

“We don’t have time, please.” She grabbed them by the hand, watching the school building collapse further as it became less able to hold its own weight with all the holes punched in each wall. Over her shoulder she pleaded with Maki to help move the obstinate murderer. 

The rock above must have spurred Maki on. If she had done nothing, surely both of them would have been crushed. And as painful as it was to keep someone who worked for the captors around she wasn’t about to lose another friend after watching what had happened with Kaito and Kokichi getting themselves killed in that harebrained scheme. 

If it ended like that, it felt like it was disrespecting their plan to stop the killing.

Maki also helped Himiko pull Kiyo away towards an opening that formed after Kiibo blew himself up to take the cage down with him. Four people crawled through, blinded by a bright expanse. 

Birds chirped. Several voices could be heard shouting. It was time to go home.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The campus was in a bright field. In fact they could clearly see the ruined courtyard from where they all stood. The wall was broken down and so all that was left behind was the twisted, warped metal of their former cage and the buildings they had walked for the several months they were in a fictional world cut off from everything else.

The line separating the two worlds was broken. It was really that thin the whole time. And it reflected the true reality they found around them. 

It was as unfamiliar as their memory of waking up inside what they had just left. Nobody but the mastermind retained any memory of ever being in this place.

They were led to a hallway by uniformed employees, many rooms lining each side of it. It looked exactly like the dorms that had been in the fictional hope’s peak. Save for the fact all the placards were for them: the survivors and the deceased. 

If there was much spoken, Himiko didn’t pay attention to it. She didn’t know what to say, how to process much of it internally. 

Korekiyo was much more aware and listened, chiming in hoping to be helpful in spite of the fact none of them would want their help. 

The mastermind was almost always scripted to be killed, to be thoroughly and finally defeated by the hope of the students. It was in fact what they had agreed to happen. This class was very different. Shuichi and Kaito and Maki of course, but the whole time Himiko was special too. 

And she didn’t remember why that was. 

They had agreed in private at some point before the procedure to fully become their characters but after the first scene’s rehearsal that it would be terrible if only one of the two had to die. In the moment of escape there was a split second where Kiyo could swear a spark in her eyes indicating some kind of memory of this.

Was it an unspoken acknowledgement? They had to check. If she had really remembered something, then maybe there wasn’t a need to perform a routine as enemies. And they could be forgiven for what happened. At least, more easily so than if she did not recall what things were like leading up to the actual game.

After things settled down, Himiko and Kiyo privately met once again. Both were nervous. 

“Himiko Yumeno. I… would like to ask you something.” 

She didn’t look up, just sitting in the chair and debating whether or not she should be afraid of them. They could go back to being Sister at any point, and that would really freak her out. 

“Go ahead.” the redhead muttered.

“Why did you save me?” Kiyo leaned forward trying to listen more closely.

“I don’t know. I… maybe it was a mistake letting you live. For some reason though I felt… like I had to.”

Maki, Shuichi, and Tsumugi certainly let her know how much of a mistake they thought it was. It didn’t feel good, even if the latter two tried their best to be polite about it. 

“If it makes you feel any better I’m not sure how I feel about this either.”

“Do you… no, did you want to die Kiyo?”

“Yes. I was quite fine with it.” they held their tongue upon finishing, hesitating. That statement was not entirely true. They had accepted it, but part of them still felt bad that only she would get out of this if they had. And that was debatably the worst outcome. The other two options would have been preferable, and they got one of them!

“I… well you know how much I wanted to die in the killing game. How scared I was.”

“I knew how much you wanted to die before, from your audition.”

That reminded her. “Why didn’t you show any from mine then?”

“I…” Kiyo started, rubbing the back of their neck. “I was sure you would hate me even more than you already should if I showed it the way I did the others.”

“Can you show me it?” she perked up a little bit. Why were they so concerned about if she hated them? They certainly seemed willing to tell her all sorts of things even though they were enemies.

They nodded and produced a USB drive. They walked over to a laptop and put it in. “And if you don’t remember anything after this, I’ll tell you everything.”

“Promise?” she pleaded with them.

“Yes.” a small smile was hidden by their mask. Maybe being enemies wasn’t a forever thing.

[thecultoftill]

A making of Deutschland report from an extra.

It was January, the weather was bad, I was driving somewhere by car and the phone rang. The screen showed: Albert Neumann P1945. With Albert, we've known each other for years and our groups, namely Die Freiwilligen  and Pomerania 1945, work quite closely together.

- Dietmar? I heard in the phone.

- Listen, I have a tip from a friend in Germany and there is a chance to play in a music video, the video is being shot in Berlin in two weeks for a well-known rock band from Germany... 8 people from your group are needed.

- Which band? - I can't tell you... -  C'mon Albert, just tell me, if it's a band beginning with "R"? - Don't tell anyone, nobody! Because I'll rip your head off and nothing will come out of it!  The rest will find out when they're on a bus. - We're going!

The rest of the events unfolded quickly, earlier plans, arrangements, holidays, family parties, etc. - everything ceased to have any meaning and was thrown out of our calendars. Six of us: Dietmar Kuptz, Rene Grzenkowicz, Szymon Poredo, Thomass Woerle, Tomasz Wylamowski and Arkadiusz Telak decided in a few seconds - we're going. From Pomerania 1945 present were Albert Neumann, Francesco Giacomelli, Jan Majewski, Szymon Szewczyk, Henryk Kaźmierczak and Bogumił Gierlotke.   First we travelled to Poznań, where it was confirmed that the music video was indeed for Rammstein. Then we travelled further, to the unforgettable Amadeus hotel in Berlin. We were taken by a bus arranged by the film crew.

I do not need to add that we were integrating with the only sounds appropriate for such a trip, and the most often repeated sentence was: "I wonder what the video will be about". We did not know what to take with us when it comes to the equipment, so we took everything. For some, it meant taking some large bags and suitcases full of uniforms and props out of the house.

On the set (first day the filming took place in the ruins of a monastery) we went early in the morning and quite quickly understood why filming is considered so exhausting: it means waiting, waiting and even more waiting. After many hours we finally got a message – dress up. Initially, we thought that we would play only German soldiers - we were prepared for that - but we learned quite quickly, that if we want, we can play completely different roles and characters. And here we experienced the first shock: it turned out, that the movie will include medieval monks, Polizei special forces, medieval knights, DDR era uniforms... That's all we saw, being on the set and changing costumes. The question remained, how (and if) the band puts it together in a sensible whole. We had various theories: maybe it will be a narcotic vision of someone who mentions the past, maybe deathbed memories of a passing life, thoughts and hallucinations of a dying soldier...

The black beauty was equally mysterious – first we saw her in the knight's armor, which in itself provoked questions. "Are we making a fantasy movie?" Our suitcases still contained German uniforms from the Second World War.

We worked until late night. In addition to the scenes in the old monastery (we played the role of monks), we also took part in scenes in a real, now closed prison in the center of Berlin (the role of rebellious prisoners). I must say that the prison scenes were quite exciting and they gave much joy at the same time. Thus, when we returned to the hotel in the morning, we were frozen and very tired - just like the members of the band, who were on set until the very end.

Next day in the morning we heard that men in SS uniforms are needed, we changed our clothes into the WW2 ones and marched on with the film crew to the military beat: Links! Links! Links! You would have to see Till Lindemann's face expression as he saw us marching in full uniforms... The set was located in an abandoned factory and here another comes another curiosity - those of us who knew the previous activity of the director of the video (Specter), knew he was the founder of  Aggro Berlin label, immediately recognized this characteristic place with the music videos of German rappers such as SIDO, FLER or B-TIGHT.

After a while, we experienced a real shock. In the middle of the square, where the movie set was located, there was a gallow with four nooses. When one of our colleagues saw that, he said out loud what everyone thought: "I've been in reconstruction for years, I've been on many re-enactment's but it was never THAT hardcore." At the time, while filming the hanging scenes, we did not know what role they would play in the whole video, but we knew one thing - nothing is simple and unambiguous in Rammstein's work.

We could be sure that this is a controversial provocation, which ultimate goal was to force the viewer to think about the scenes he had watched, but we still had no idea in which context the scenes that were so brutal and that showed the worst moments of German history would be used.

During the shooting of those scenes, we got a bit closer to the band - it was cold, so during the breaks and while warming hands at the fireplace, Till offered everyone... Absolut vodka. The fire - and the fiery water - bring people closer... This was also the case this time. Thanks to such small gestures, we will remember the work on the set as an amazing experience.

The members of the band behaved like ordinary people, they were even slightly annoyed by their harassing assistants. It turned out that the recordings will not end in the announced two days, and will be continued until late night. However, it was time for us to go home. The bus engine was warming up. Some of the colleagues, including the guys from Pomerania, stayed on the final recordings. They were shooting pictures of a big battle, on a huge battlefield, burning at the stake and riots in unspecified time in one of the German cities.

In the night, when burning bus was glowing (scene from the riots), about 3AM in the morning, Specter shouted "We got this, thank you everyone!", people shouted, cheering and rewarded the team with an applause. Both the film crew and the team thanked the participants with a handshake, in person! Before we left, we looked around looking for the band members. When the vocalist Till Lindemann passed us, we were speechless, he was dressed in knight's armor, pierced with a few swords - his look combined with fatigue on his face made an electrifying impression on us. We got autographs, wishes for safe travel and we went home in a messy way, in fact, we do not really believe in what we've experienced in the last two days.

While going to the set, we were quite confused and didn't know what to expect, on the way back we were completely lost. How do we put everything together? What is the meaning of all this? We tried to make various hypotheses, referring to the song "Deutschland" which was released played several times on the set (yes, we heard the song already in January), but still we could 't come up with a coherent story. We had to wait until the premiere.

The atmosphere became dense a few days earlier when the band released the teaser into the scene - as it turned out later, that was closing the 9-minute music video. As you know, the media heated up, Rammstein was accused of ridiculing the Holocaust, disrespecting the historical approach, and even insulting the memory of the victims. On March 28 at 18.10, after watching the music video, everything became clear.

The band once again used people's tendency to generalize and reproduce stereotypes. The video turned out to be a unique depiction of the German history, a country which the lyrical subject "cannot give his love" - among other things due to the difficult past of the homeland. We won't hide that most of our colleagues are die-hard Rammstein fans, and the participation in the recording for "Deutschland" music video was the greatest adventure in our lives! We built a monument for the rest of our lives, and even posthumously...

It was a nice surprise to see our names in the final credits of the music video. In addition to our two groups, the music featured our colleagues from historical re-enactment groups: Dragoner, Bellum, Maienburg152IR, Rogatywka 1918-1939 and Erhard M17. They played the role of soldiers of the imperial German army from the First World War.

Found on Rammstein Belgium FB.

[ollyarchive]

Years & Years’ Olly Alexander: ‘There’s entrenched homophobia at all levels of the music industry’

The frontman speaks to Brian O’Flynn about the importance of queer voices, the decline of pop music and how he keeps his mental health struggles in check

The past couple of years have seen queer pop acts climb their way up the cultural ladder. Artists such as Christine and the Queens, Hayley Kiyoko, Janelle Monae, Troye Sivan and Sam Smith are all pouring their sexuality into their music – by and large to critical acclaim. One of the most prominent members of this new queer cohort is Olly Alexander, frontman of British synthpop band Years & Years. But for him, there’s still a long way to go.

“There’s entrenched homophobia behind the scenes at all levels of the music industry,” says the 28-year-old. “It’s got so much better, but I think it’s gonna take a radical shift before these men who are in control of the funds and the labels and the radio stations are gonna be OK with overt queerness. They see it as turning off part of the audience.”

Years & Years, who play London’s O2 Arena today, came out in a big way in 2015. After being named BBC Sound of 2015 in January, the three-piece secured their first number one single a couple of months later, before topping the album charts that July with their debut record, Communion. Musically, they skilfully tapped into the then-zeitgeist for soulful pop-house.

By this point, Alexander was already a fairly familiar face, having appeared as an actor in the Channel 4 drama Skins, as well as Gaspar Noé’s Enter the Void and Laura Wade’s The Riot Club. He was always out, but his lyricism at the time was more cloaked than it is these days, his hair a demure brown and his body wrapped in unassuming boy-next-door T-shirts. Three years later, you’d scarcely recognise him touring second album Palo Santo. His hair now a fiery red inspired by Rihanna – whom he recently met on The Graham Norton Show – Alexander bounces out on stages in glittery bodysuits and high-fashion ensembles while singing about BDSM and breaking up with boyfriends.

“There were a lot of people who were uncomfortable with how overtly sexual this album was,” says Alexander. “When we did our show for the first time we had a few comments that it wasn’t family friendly. I reject that completely.”

Though their recent single “If You’re Over Me” climbed to number six, Years & Years’ second, more unambiguously gay record hasn’t quite matched the chart-topping success of Communion, where the lyrics and visuals were more neutral. Christine and the Queens, too, has experienced a drop-off in mainstream chart success with her second album, itself more gender non-conforming in its aesthetic. Given what Alexander says about the music industry, is it possible that the wider public is still less comfortable with explicit queerness than we’d like to believe, for all the recent renaissance of the LGBT+ pop scene?

“The music industry has changed so much,” he argues, “and audiences have changed the way they listen to music, so across the board many artists haven’t been able to replicate the success they had a few years ago. Pop music is very trend-driven as well, and it’s very focused on hip hop now – look at Drake in the US. So, ‘pop pop’ music is definitely on the wane.”

“Pop pop music” is undoubtedly what Years & Years represent. Their synth-heavy, swooping sound feels like it belongs in a queer cathedral, like layered gay organ music, their lyrics riffing off this religious association in songs such as “Worship” and “Sanctify”. If there’s a church Alexander is genuflecting at it’s that of Britney Spears, and Nineties pop-R&B courses, quite clearly, through his blood.

The nervous, handwringing ebullience Alexander exudes when talking about Britney or Rihanna never fully leaves him. He’s restless and fastidiously polite, saying “aw, thank you” to any remotely positive comment and constantly apologising for himself (“Oh no, I’ve explained that so badly,” he often says). A lot of discussion around him is excitable and feverish, too, given what he represents for so many young gay people.

Just as Alexander has elevated the queerness in his work, so too he’s become a leading spokesperson for the wider LGBTQ+ community. He has used his TV appearances to protest homophobic laws in Poland, and patiently guided just about every interviewer and presenter in the global media through gay politics and identity. He also presented a BBC documentary on gay mental health, after a good deal of dark firsthand experience.

He says he still needs to be “militant” about his own daily routines to keep himself together. “I know it sounds so obvious, but I didn’t eat three meals a day for a very long period of my life so I have to make sure I do it now,” he says with a laugh. He’s mostly happy these days, though still struggles from time to time: “I had two weeks earlier this month where I just felt really low and it really freaked me out, actually. Whenever I start to feel a bit low, I think I overreact because I’m scared I’m going to retreat into this hellish black hole I used to be in as a teenager.”

We needn’t worry, though – he has routines in place now to keep him balanced: “I sing in the mornings and count my blessings like Cinderella!” Though Alexander projects this kind of warm, smiley enthusiasm, my main impression of him is one of measured realism. He coolly and carefully unpicks the state of queerness, queer pop, and his place in it all.

“I think the reason I’ve been so committed to advocacy is because I see so many people in pain,” he says. “We’re seeing a lot of infiltration of mainstream spaces which is super exciting and positive but... I don’t know if I’d call it a tipping point.

“I just don’t know if the perception of that ‘successful’ queer pop narrative is reflected in the realities of people’s lives,” he continues. “A lot of the fans who message me are really suffering. I really do worry there isn’t enough being done to help – enough provision in place.”

In the rush to celebrate the sense of joy and freedom that’s come along with figures such as Alexander, Troye Sivan and Sam Smith, we perhaps overlook how much work is still left to be done. This burden never seems to be far from Alexander’s mind: even as he works to project his own queerness, he worries about who he’s talking over. “There’s a glaring similarity between us,” he says of fellow stars Sivan and Smith. “It would be outrageous to say we haven’t benefited from whiteness. I always go around in my head like, ‘Am I just continuing to enable that system, am I just creating more problematic shit by taking up space as a gay man?’”

“It’s upsetting to see how poor the representation of such a diverse community is,” he continues. “It’s still the same people being asked to speak on things. Sometimes I’m like, ‘Can’t we have someone else’? But then at the same time, I’m like, ‘Well, if they’re asking me to speak I’d better say something!’”

Alexander isn’t content to just throw his hands up in the air, though. It seems he’s found a way to kill two birds with one stone; to make more provision for young gay people, and hand some of his speaking time over to those who are less represented. His next big project is his plan to create a queer festival called Rendez-Vous.

“It came from wanting to create an inspirational network for queer people,” he says. Their shows in London will be a trial run of sorts, a precursor to something bigger in the future. Trans icon Munroe Bergdorf will compere, there will be sexual health information stands and gender neutral bathrooms. “Hopefully it will eventually become a festival,” he says. “It’s basically about giving the stage over to amazing talent. I haven’t really experienced that anywhere yet.”

The London show will feature fast-rising pansexual popstar Rina Sawayama, and he reels off a list of acts he wants to see there in the future. Primarily, he wants to empower marginalised voices and share his platform, to leverage some of his accumulated influence on to those less heard. “We have a unique opportunity to introduce Years & Years audiences, who aren’t all queer, to some acts they wouldn’t come across in their usual Spotify playlists. And I want there to be queer thinkers giving speeches, and a place where you can get tested, have it be community focused. Giving back to the community is something that I care about,” he concludes. “Oh god, I’ve explained it really badly,“ he apologises yet again, though he hasn’t at all.

As LGBT and female acts tend to be sidelined in mainstream festivals, and straight men still dominate the industry, this is an exciting and novel prospect. You can’t be pushed out if you own the space, right?

In the meantime, Alexander’s off to make sure he gets some food before his show tonight, when he’ll get a different kind of nourishment. “You know when you’re playing a video game and Mario needs to eat mushrooms to get big and stay alive? Playing shows to queer people, it kind of feels like that,” he says. “It restores my energy.”

Years & Years are currently touring the UK

[zareleonis]

My Star Wars Top 10 of 2018

This year I fell massively in love with Star Wars, learned more about a galaxy far, far away that I ever expected and started this blog, first to liveblog Star Wars Rebels, and later to share my thoughts on whatever new (and old!) Star Wars media I came across. In honor of what, in my mind, was a really fun year for Star Wars, I wanted to share my top 10 list of my favorite Star Wars things that came out this year, across different kinds of media. Read more because it’s really long :P

Honorable Mention: Flight of the Falcon multimedia series (by multiple authors and artists)

Okay, if I’m honest, this gets honorable mention spot, mostly because I felt like putting it in top 10 when it’s really a BUNCH of comics and books would be totally cheating :P One of the more fun things to come out of Solo: A Star Wars Story, this series of loosely connected books and comics whose main connecting factor is the Millennium Falcon (and Bazine Netal’s hunt for it!) is an absolute joy. Cavan Scott knocks it out of the park with the ridiculously fun Choose Your Destiny: A Luke and Leia Adventure. IDW Comics does what’s it does best by bringing together some exciting and unexpected pairs of characters for the last couple months of Star Wars Adventures. In Lando’s Luck Justina Ireland gave us the coolest darn Princess in Star Wars since Leia, Rinetta Gan. And they’re not even done yet, with 2 more comics and Pirate’s Price left to go!

10. Star Wars: Scum and Villainy: Case Files on the Galaxy’s Most Notorious by Pablo Hidalgo

What an awesome and fun book! So much great art, and Pablo Hidalgo always gives 100% with his work. It’s such a creative concept, following Tan Divo and and his descendants, as they report on the criminals and rebels of their day. I completely geeked out over how it gave soooo much neat new information about characters and organizations from ALL OVER the Star Wars universe. It’s an absolute blast!

9. Solo: A Star Wars Story: Tales from Vandor by Jason Fry

This book is AMAZING. Even among the “replica journal” style books that Studio Fun puts out, it stands out as super unique, written from the point of view of the Midnight, the bartender at The Lodge on Vandor (where Han meets Lando), as if he is telling the story to a guest. It’s such a fun outsider’s point of view of Han and the other characters of Solo. The best part though, is the parts of the book that are just a shameless love letter to Star Wars Legends, with nods to stuff like The Wookiee Storybook, LEGO Star Wars: The Padawan Menace and several novels. Jason Fry’s love for the franchise really shines through.

8. Star Wars: Poe Dameron by Charles Soule and penciller Angel Unzueta

This year we said a bittersweet goodbye to Marvel’s monthly Star Wars: Poe Dameron and goodness gracious it was good. Between the Legend Found arc that was to be the original ending and the final The Awakening arc, where Black Squadron is reunited after The Last Jedi, this comic really touched my heart. The last couple pages of issues 25 and 31 still make me cry. :’)

7. Solo: A Star Wars Story directed by Ron Howard and screenplay by Lawrence and Jon Kasdan

THIS MOVIE IS CRIMINALLY UNDERRATED AND I’M MAD AT EVERYONE WHO LET IT FLOP. I’ll admit I wasn’t exactly desperate for a Han Solo Backstory Movie, but Solo was just AWESOME. Just some good, raw, Star Wars-y fun that you can’t help but smile the whole way through. It might not be groundbreaking, but it introduced some super cool characters in L3-37, Qi’ra and Enfys Nest, gave us Maul’s grand triumphant return to the public at large and has INCREDIBLY charming performances by Alden Ehrenreich and Donald Glover as the Han and Lando we all come to love.

6. The Mighty Chewbacca in the Forest of Fear! by Tom Angleberger

If Solo, is good, this kid’s book written to accompany it is even better. I mean, Chewbacca meets K-2SO meets Tooka cats meets teenage bounty hunter/librarian?? On a planet with scary monsters and a spooky evil Force user? Also Cassian is there?? And the daughter of This Funny Hat Dude from Return of the Jedi? Hell yeah!!!!!

The book is hysterical, ridiculously fun and I can’t recommend it enough. I just have to say if you do get it, try and grab the audiobook it’s got a full cast of voices for the main characters including Marc Thompson giving his best Shyriiwook as Chewbacca. I laughed so hard I cried at the narration and a K-2SO’s lines done out loud. You won’t regret it!

5. Star Wars: Women of the Galaxy by Amy Ratcliffe and eighteen awesome artists!

THIS is one of the coolest Star Wars books out there and a celebration of all the women we know and love (and sometimes hate) in a galaxy far, far away. It’s such a wonderful collaboration, created by all women (& non-binary) artists and author. I love that it’s got characters from practically everything—movies, books, comics, video games, you name it! We even got to see characters like Jas Emari for the first time which makes me SO HAPPY. it’s one of the books I come back to all the time just to flip through it and enjoy the illustrations.

4. Star Wars Resistance created by Dave Filoni and executive produced by Athena Yvette Portillo, Justin Ridge, and Brandon Auman

I LOVE RESISTANCE SO MUCH!! I didn’t quiiite know what to expect with the new animated series, but was super excited and it hasn’t disappointed one bit. It’s such a fun show and really enjoyable to have a Star Wars show that is almost just ‘slice of life’ compared to the others. The animation is so cool to me and the characters really cute. I’m ridiculously charmed by all of them, especially our main man Kazuda Xiono and really hyped to see where these characters go. It’s more happy and fun than anything, but I know it will break my heart to pieces soon enough (KAZUDA XIONO. HOME PLANET: HOSNIAN PRIME). I hope more people give it a chance because it really is awesome!

3. Star Wars Adventures: Tales from Vader's Castle by Cavan Scott and various artists

LET THIS BE MY LOVE LETTER TO CAVAN SCOTT AND ALL THE COOL AND AWESOME STUFF HE’S DONE WITH THE STAR WARS UNIVERSE!! I was soooo excited when these came out because it’s such an AWESOME idea, I mean? Star Wars Horror story one-shots connected by a wider plot??? YES PLEASE AND THANK YOU. Doubly so when they star Lina Graf, of the Adventures in Wild Space series by Cavan Scott and Tom Huddleston. I was soooo excited to see her again and it’s amazing to see how she’s grown from a young kid to a brave and capable pilot and Commander in the Rebellion.

Then the individual stories are just awesome. It was a joy to see Kanan and Hera back together again after Rebels (or, well, pre-Rebels). The Dooku story was just amazing and such an enthusiastic tribute to Christopher Lee as Dracula. The Frozen inspired Han and Chewie story was also pretty great and I LOVE that it referenced the events of The Mighty Chewbacca in the Forest of Fear! And, my personal favorite story, the spooky ewok story featuring a young Chief Chirpa and Logray was brilliant and I enjoyed getting a closer first-hand look at ewoks (something we don’t have much of, at least in canon!). All in all just an absolute masterpiece in my book and a great reminder of why IDW Comics’ Star Wars stuff has been so freaking awesome.

2. Join the Resistance: Attack on Starkiller Base by Ben Blacker and Ben Acker and illustrated by Annie Wu

I’M BACK AT IT YELLING ABOUT WHY MORE PEOPLE NEED TO CARE ABOUT THESE WONDERFUL, CHARMING LITTLE KIDS’ BOOKS!! This was such a perfect end to the J-Squadron kids’ story. To me, this series is such a hidden gem and I really hope more people give it a chance. It was wonderful how all the characters’ stories closed out. I loved seeing Jo finally openly defy his parents, Mattis putting his faith in the Force and his friends, the return of Klimo, AG-90 and Dec fighting as brothers but growing stronger for it, and Lorica becoming the hero everybody thought she was. There’s so many fun cameos, from Rey, to Hux to Poe and Black Squadron, with the backdrop of the actual climactic battle in The Force Awakens.

And, one thing I really want to talk about that I love, is how the book (in tandem with the first two) give us the first gay character in a Star Wars kids book, with Dec Hansen. I wish they could’ve said it a bit more explicitly, but we actually got the kid and his friends talking about it in the books? And, with most of the LGBT characters falling more on the “scum and villainy” circles of the galaxy, it’s so refreshing to see a brave and unambiguously heroic gay teenage starfighter pilot trainee. Like, holy shit that actually happened!!!! ANYWAYS READ THIS SERIES I LOVE THEM AND YOU SHOULD TOO.

Oh, also, Annie Wu’s illustrations are AWESOME and I hope she does more Star Wars stuff (Pirate’s Price, out in a week!)

1. Star Wars Rebels created by Dave Filoni, Simon Kinberg and Carrie Beck

I don’t think there’s way I could place anything but Rebels at #1. This show changed my life in so many ways and I’m just. ridiculously thankful it exists. without Rebels, I wouldn’t have this blog, I wouldn’t be up to my ears obsessed with Star Wars and I there’s so many friends I wouldn’t have either. It’s touched my heart in a way that.... gosh I don’t know if I can even think about anything that resonates with me quite in the way Star Wars Rebels has. Pretty sure most if not all of my followers have seen Rebels, haha, but if you haven’t. You won’t regret it. Well, you might. It hurts. I hate to say, but it does. But even if the end destination leaves you heartbroken and uh prone to randomly bursting into tears about it, you will never regret the journey. Everything I learned and experienced with Ezra, Kanan, Hera, Sabine, Zeb and Chopper is beyond precious to me and I’m thankful it exists because it made my year in so many ways.

[scriptscribbles]

So I've noticed you love Hell Bent. I've been looking back at 12's era and rethinking about how I feel about Clara, but I still have a small hatred for Hell Bent. I'd love to understand why you care for it so much and if you could give me a new view on the episode that nearly made me want to give up on the show.

Well, it’s rather a lot.

The thing about Hell Bent, it’s telling a very specific story. Everything about it is built around it. It’s a character-based story about the Doctor and Clara, and the fallout their personality meshing creates. If you’re looking for something else, it’s gonna be a huge letdown. But from the pre-credits, it makes its mission statement clear. It’s a big, melodramatic, poetic song about the Doctor and Clara parting ways, using that lens to approach a massive spectrum of concerns in Doctor Who as a show, engaging with its mythology and privilege and more. And I love it for that.

Everything about it is built around that. Everything. The hybrid prophecy, for example, that the whole arc was built around teasing. “All Matrix prophecies concur that this creature will one day stand in the ruins of Gallifrey. It will unravel the Web of Time and destroy a billion billion hearts to heal its own.” That’s exactly what happens. The confrontation with Ashildr takes place in the ruins of the cloisters on Gallifrey. The Doctor destroyed a billion, billion of his own hearts in the confession dial. And the web of time is torn by Clara’s survival, the Doctor utilizing the extraction chamber. Rachel Talalay has even suggested a later minor detail of Clara’s chronolock tattoo being missing was deliberate, which suggests the web of time was, indeed, torn, with Clara’s fixed death being torn apart. It’s all handled with great subtlety, but on every level, the episode holds together.

And this ties into every big conflict in the episode. It’s a story about care driving people to darkness (following off on a previous finale about the same thing, with Dark Water showcasing why Missy chose Clara, as well). Rassilon, for example. The General reminds the Doctor that “He was a good man once,” but the pursuit of Time Lord survival at all costs pushed him to becoming a raving despot. Missy, too, fits this. She’s always seeking to bring out the worst in the Doctor in the hopes of restoring their relationship, with her even using Clara as a pawn to make that point, because Clara is so like the Doctor and their codependency is so prone to creating drastic consequences. And, of course, we get the Doctor at his darkest, taking down the High Council, in a truly awe-inspiring sequence. On every level, it’s a story about how clinging to something in the hopes of it surviving, even when the end has already come, is a fundamentally damaging thing. And so the Doctor, in the end, has to accept that he must part ways. On his own terms, but part all the same, because it’s time for an ending.

This all fits, what’s more, into a beautiful, feminist concluding statement. Clara was, of course, just like the Doctor. And it would be a cruel, cruel statement to make to fans that young girls shouldn’t aspire to be like the Doctor or they’ll end up dead in the street. Instead, she gets to assert her agency all the way, and as a result become a Doctor of her very own. Donna’s ending, most notably, gets totally subverted, with Clara demanding to be heard. And Clara flies off in the TARDIS as her own Doctor, while the Doctor himself can move on and heal and deal with the fact that an ending has come. You can’t really ignore the gendered implications of it, either. A woman as the Doctor was still a controversial thing that Moffat was paving the way for. Clara, for her part, was a massive piece of that. Hell Bent even cracks the “Clara Who” joke at long last. She’s an exploration of whether an ordinary girl can be every bit as wonderful and flawed as the Doctor (as introduced into the narrative by Missy, herself a huge piece of the puzzle in terms of making a woman Doctor possible), and in the end, we’re told, of course she can. It is, for my money, one of the most triumphant moments in the show, full of pure positive, aspirational joy of the sort that I love Doctor Who for.

And there’s sort of an interesting overlap between that and the Doctor’s angst as a commentary on dynamics of the privileged lead. Because it’s not just a corrupt and damaging thing, but also a fairly patriarchal construct to reject. Like, Me calls him out on thinking he knows best for her fate, for one thing. And we get the nice little moment with the General going from white man to black woman. But better yet is the cut line from Ohila, which explicitly links that thematic thread. As Steven Moffat said in Doctor Who magazine, “There’s a moment in Hell Bent I deeply regret cutting. The Doctor reveals that he’s reassigned the High Council to the sewers, and Ohila remarks that only an aristocrat regards honest work as punishment. That’s the Doctor all over: he knows that the aristocracy must be deposed, but even in bringing it about he reveals that he will always be one of them. If he’s any kind of role model, it’s because he tries to be good, not because he already is. You certainly don’t have to be a white male to play all that - though you can see why it’s a decent fit.” This episode is a big point on that. It’s pretty much saying, it’s time. It’s time for the Doctor to put aside this privilege. It’s time for the show to embrace that a woman can totally fly off in the TARDIS. Doctor Who has to accept endings sometimes, and look forward to a bright future.

For me, it is a script full of emotion and poetry and unambiguous positivity no matter how dark things get. And it’s such a great step toward the future. It was never a given that Chibnall’s era would feature Jodie Whittaker as the Doctor, but after Hell Bent, that beautiful, unambiguous statement about the future direction of Doctor Who, it’d look pretty damn awkward if he got another white man.