#the deep breathing isn't working batman. or whatever that reference is
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my cat's surgery is scheduled and the recovery will be. pretty intense
#i have to do little physical therapy exercises with him three times a day#which. fine? i can do that#but he has to be confined to a small area where he cannot run or jump for 3 whole months#and that shit is going to be ROUGH#a week? sucks but i could handle it#THREE MONTHS?? of my little boy not being able to move and having to be in a cone?#i've spent the last 6 days like. paralyzed because I'm just WAITING#waiting and watching him in pain!!!!!#first i was waiting for the vet apt now im waiting for the surgery#and after that itll be 3 months of waiting for him to recover#maybe its the looming dread of how ALL of my routines will be out the fucking window#and i have so much shit to do the next few weeks#the body must survive to care for my cat (and it will) but the mind will tap out early i think#3 months of cold compresses and warm compresses and physical therapy and 2 weeks of cone and 8 weeks of limited mobility#and i have two finals due next week that i haven't even started uwu#i mean maybe thats good?#i can work on those on my laptop sitting in his little cage maybe#:(#at least my parents are paying for the surgery. i have to remember that#i am still on track to graduate. i can still get the goddamn hell out of here eventually#but i have been so nervous for the past week i can literally feel the cortisol in my bloodstream#(thats an exaggeration i know that isnt how stress or cortisol works)#he's going to have a nakey leg. like a rotisserie chicken#oughhgh i feel the anxiety eating me like bugs!!!!!!!#the deep breathing isn't working batman. or whatever that reference is
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