#the contrast between donnie pleading because he's so convinced he's failed and raph being right there willing to love him anyway

[qoldenskies]

random as hell but i think the touch starvation but touching hurts aspect of cu wormed its way into my dream a bit,,,,, like animals were experiencing it so when people tried to comfort them they got aggressive and no one knew what to do so they left them alone then they got worse and disintegrated 😭

as a veeeery touch-starved person,,, whenever my family tries to reach out for me i find it very uncomfortable. i definitely wanted to project the feeling of wanting to be touched but it always feeling a little Wrong onto the whole situation, but paired with avoiding it causing literal pain,,, of course it'd be overwhelming and borderline painful within itself when it just suddenly. Stops

hhhh it does hurt to think about when raph first discovers him in his lab that donnie completely flips his shit because it doesn't hurt anymore. he knew from the moment he figured it out that if he leaned on them he wouldnt be able to let go, and he was terrified of losing himself and being so useless. him screaming is a response to emotional agony-- this sudden delirious realization that its too late and he wont be able to work anymore and they're all going to hate him-- more than it is physical agony ... head in hands