#thats the one thing ab tumblr i cannot STAND

[i8jisoo]

𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐘 𝐊𝐈𝐃𝐒 ⇉ skz with pregnant!reader 

changbin x reader | part three of dad!skz

↬ genre; fluff & angst for a lil bit woo

↬ warnings; talk of perinatal depression, cursing, n labor 

↬ notes; changbin babi 🥺  ALSO ITS CHANGBIN DAY WOOO ITS MY BABYS BDAYYYYY SO I HAD TO POST THIS |

u two had just freshly started an official, public relationship

ofc changbin was freaking out while he was chilling in the bathtub behind the curtain so u could pee on the test already

u two were looking at the line coming in, praying that there would be only o n e 😳

slowly the other line comes in, dark blue n clear alongside the other one

“holy fuck—“

“what do we do?” you asked, your voice wavering while setting the test back down

his hands cupped your face, giving u a soft kiss n hugging you

“we got this, we’re having a baby, baby!” he started to joke and yall burst out laughing while crying in the bathroom

the first few months were amazing

ur lil bump sprouted out n u two were so happy about it

changbin is just so attentive and excited about this pregnancy and his first born

u really couldn’t have been better with ur lil family that was starting to become realer with each day

u two r such bullies yall r like

“what happened? ur a softie now binnie!!”

n he’d say shit like, “well at least i don’t pee every hour on the clock!!”

he makes u cry one time n u use that against him everytime u want something bc he feels guilty >:)

cute lil things like asking the baby what they want to eat or talking to it before the bed

(changbin reads the baby goodnight moon one time and ur just so in love like wow 🥺)

he secretly talks to the baby when you sleep every night because hes waiting for when ur little bean will reply back with a kick or a hand

he is W H I P P E D for u n ur baby bump

nursery is already done at five months

he needs all of the boys to come over though to help him figure out the instructions 😳 these are co nfusi ngg

they notice how smiley n giggly he is when he talks about u two and looking at the finished crib hes just so proud

yall r so happy and content with ur baby that was an accident, but u guys are so happy this happened

but something changes within u

changbin notices your lack of interest in the pregnancy during ur sixth month

ur sleeping pattern was off n u would sleep for hours during the day and night

u were very irritable, not wanting changbin to cuddle with u or kiss u like he did everytime he came back from practice :(

u were always unhappy and always so moody, he just wanted u to be happy 🥺

he is so confused and worried ab u, some days ur not eating or some days u don’t even wake up in the mornings like u used to

sometimes— just sometimes he’d come back home to find u in the same spot, asleep

he’s so fucking scared when ur around seven months that he can’t hold it in anymore

“are—are you okay?” he questions u from the doorway, making u stop to look at him in the mirror

ur eyes were cold, setting down the towel u were drying ur hair with and leaving him by himself while heading into ur bedroom

“don’t you dare fucking walk away from me.”

ur s h oo k

he was really nice during the pregnancy everyday, super bubbly and kind so u were shocked to hear his upset tone

“i can and i will, i’ll just go sleep in another fuckin room.” u mumbled, changbin grabbing ur hands and turning u around to face him

u struggle for a bit while ur arguing with him and telling him to let go so u could go to sleep

“stop! i am your boyfriend, i am the only one who is going to care for you like this. i am the only one who is dying, seeing you like this. do you understand? we’ve been through seven months of this together, it was fine for awhile and now you’re fucking turning me away?”

hes shouting at this point, hes just so pissed after three months of not having answers and your attitudes and arguments, he cannot handle it

u start crying

hes quick to hold you, pulling u down to the bed so u don’t have to stand on ur tired feet anymore

“i don’t know what’s wrong with me.” 🥺🥺🥺

he insists u two will find out n u both will get thru this rough patch together

perinatal depression, they diagnosed u

changbin is so upset when he hears the doctors tell u

everything is making sense to him and he’s just so heartbroken he didn’t put two and two together earlier

he takes time off for the time being to make sure ur taking care of urself

hes watching u like a hawk but trying not to make it evident

the first time u ask him for a kiss, he gives u dozens

he hadn't been asked for kisses in so long he was so relieved 🥺

he’s constantly telling u how beautiful u r and talking to ur bump about how they have the best genes and their uncles

this man is a father already it seems

he is ur #1 face mask partner cause he buys the cute ones only because u deserve the cute ones that r ur favorite ◝(ᵔᵕᵔ)◜

cooking together is something that happens, not often but every once in awhile he will let u do small things

cut up some lettuce? sure! pour in the soup broth? of course u can! taste test his food? always.

he wants to make sure ur comfortable with him touching u or kissing u or what hes saying

“i love you.” he’s mumbling, quickly placing a kiss against the fabric of one of his own shirts that was worn by u and fit u like a dress still

he then goes up to ur cheek n presses a kiss to it, ur hand cupping his jaw and letting him kiss ur lips >.<

also u guys let out a quiet talk of pregnancy to the public, letting jyp release a notice on changbin’s absence from live-streams and posts with the boys

u two received a lot of positive feedback which changbin let u read the positive ones n loved when u smiled at each one

u were overdue by a week which was the worst, ur back hurt and u had migraines

u also were put on bed-rest for the next week before u could be inducted

u guys waited out the week and u got scheduled for an induction

the labor was really slow which sucked because u just wanted to hold ur baby already :(

rly intimate moments like chan just holding u n rocking u like a baby

u guys are given this position to move the baby down, your knees on the ground so u could kneel against the bed and changbin would hold ur hips n rock them

he just feels so bad he can’t do anything to help u with the pain 🥺

yall kinda vibing with the hospital food (idk bout yall but some food from hospitals smack chile)

“i just want to go home.” :(

u bet ur ass he scoots into ur hospital bed, holding ur hands n u just cry into his shoulder

he feels like his heart is being torn to pieces when he listens to u cry out of pain

his free hands holds your jaw, making u look up at him

“we’re almost done baby, okay? i know it hurts, if i could i would take your pain in a heartbeat. you are incredibly strong and i’m so proud of you. you just need to hang in here for a few more hours, yeah? you think you can do that?”

u give him the weakest smile ever but its better than nothing

u reach 10cm!!!

now the part that wasn’t fun was the pushing :/

u were hurting, u were tired, and u had been promised almost seven times that all u need was one more push but no matter what, it seemed like the baby wasnt budging

“the cord is wrapped around the neck, we need you to stop pushing. okay?”

ur too tired and stopping the pushing sounded good so u did as they said but when they told u they needed to actually reach in and unwrap it ur blood ran cold

u both were worried about how much u could take

u screamed, god it hurt and it felt like hours of them twisting but it was a mere minute

the labor progressed n there it was

“a girl!”

u two are like faucets or waterfalls

shes literally the perfect mixture of u both 🥺

he washed her hair n helped wrap her up in a blanket, giving her over to u for the first time

u both were just in love with her, she was absolutely perfect

he’s obsessed with her, taking in that baby scent, the scent of the light baby shampoo and the bit of baby powder that lingered throughout her onesie

her hair wooooww its so soft n fluffy

her little baby pout and her puffy cheeks

i can see him calling her bunny for awhile as a childhood nickname

he’ll just be like

“oh that’s my bunny!!”

weird look from u but ur heart melts while he bounces her in his arms n gives her some kissies and running his fingers thru her hair

he’s also rly soft, i don’t see him singing but i see him definitely whispering to her about how she’s gonna grow up and have the best life because thats his little girl

“ur gonna have eight uncles, they are crazy but it’s okay. u definitely lucked out on fathers though, i’m pretty good at lullaby's. u did get great genes too, u have a handsome daddy and a gorgeous mommy. we worked really hard on making u, please don’t hurt ur cute little face. u also have a storm coming, there’s a thing called stays, they are gonna adore you, i promise.”

omgomgomgomg jejejejeje im blushing at the thought of this i just adore dad changbin 

u guys may or may not be planning for another but it definitely would happen in a few years

©️ maysdiors 2020 :: all rights reserved. do not repost my work on tumblr or other platforms.

[sailorshadzter]

across the sea and back again. chapter 3.

here it is, chapter 3! 

im excited to step into the next phase of the story. we’ve got 2 chapters left! i hope you guys enjoy this new chapter!! 

read on ao3. 

read chapter 1 on tumblr

read chapter 2 on tumbr. 

In King's Landing, a raven arrives.

"A letter, your grace." The servant bows and backs from the room, leaving his queen with the letter in her hands, seated just behind the desk of her solar. Turning it over, Cersei recognizes at once the seal upon the letter. Blinking, she breaks the Stark seal and unfolds the parchment, the handwriting familiar to her, even now.

This is your one and only warning. Abdicate the throne, as it was never yours to claim. The North does not forget and one day soon, the wolves will come again. 

 Sansa Stark, Queen in the North.

Cersei crumples the parchment in her fist and tosses it as hard as she can, jumping up from where she sits, storming across the room to stand at the window, peering out into the sunlit city, the sun beginning it's downward cycle towards the horizon. She's alive, Cersei grumbles to herself, catching her lower lip between her teeth, tearing at her flesh. And dares declare herself Queen in the North. She had heard the rumors- the rumors that Sansa Stark and Jon Snow were alive and gaining support in the North, but she had thought them to be just that- rumors. It had been almost two years since the pair had seemingly vanished, dead most assumed. Cersei had spent more than one gold coin on searching for the Stark girl, but every effort went without reward.

There comes a knock on the door and she turns as it opens. "Sansa Stark is alive," she says to Jaime when he steps into the room, the door falling closed behind him. "She calls herself Queen in the North." Jaime does not look all that surprised, telling Cersei that he too has been told of this new development. "Send someone. Poison her, cut off her head, I do not care!" Cersei jabs a finger into his chest, her anger spilling over. "I want her dead."

"I've heard. But Cersei... There is more." Jaime says, a hand to her arm calming the rage within her and though she opens her mouth to speak, she falls quiet, allowing him to speak on. "I've been written that Jon Snow is..." He glances left and right, as if to ensure they are truly alone, before continuing. "Jon Snow is Rhaegar Targaryen's son, begotten by that Stark girl he took off with at the tourney."

"Impossible."

"I thought so, too, but it seems as if it's been written of in the collection of the Septon's journals. He wrote of an annulment. A marriage."

Cersei's eyes widen, shock evident, but then those eyes narrow as she takes a step back from Jaime and turning her back to him as if she will hear no more. "A Targaryen heir," the golden queen murmurs, arms folding over her chest as she sinks into thought. "Do they bow to him?" She asks aloud, though she knows Jaime does not know the answer. "Do they call him the rightful king?" The North is extremely loyal, distrusting folk- they would stand behind Jon Snow, even with his newfound Targaryen blood, well before they would ever stand with her. "It doesn't matter," she decides with a shake of her cropped golden hair, turning back around to face her twin. "He will die, too in the end." Jaime nods, though more so because he knows what will happen if he disagrees, rather than actually agreeing with her. He hates to admit it, even to himself, but Jaime hates this woman Cersei has become. "What of Highgarden?" She steers the conversation elsewhere, to speak of their other enemies in other places.

He sighs, but he speaks anyways, for it's all he can really do.

[ x x x ]

They have taken up residence in the mountains that border the wolfswood, with House Flint; it is close to Winterfell, but not dangerously so. And the woods are full of wolves, ready and willing to bare their fangs at anyone who dares trek through the trees. Ghost roams among the wolves, his howls louder than all the rest, a reminder that House Stark is to come again.

It has been a long three weeks since the truth of Jon's birth came to light- among other things. The truth of their relationship, no, marriage, had to be explained and of course there was little Robb to introduce. Sansa considers herself lucky to be surrounded by lords who in the end, care more for the happiness of their queen and the security of the North than a child born out of wedlock. If anyone wonders about his age and when he was conceived, none speak of it- at least out loud. The truth was, the lords know that the birth of an heir only strengthens their power of independence. And more than that, with Jon as the true heir to the Iron Throne and an heir to follow after him only strengthens his claim. What did Cersei have to offer the realm of man? Certainly no heir. Sansa knows how little love there is for Cersei in King's Landing- she knows that they fear their queen and that she thrives on that fear. If I am ever queen, I shall make them love me. Those were the words she once thought, so many years ago and she can't help but to smile as she thinks of the Northern lords and their loyalty. It was not the crown she had thought to ever wear, but she would make her people proud. She would keep them safe.

"Your grace?"

She turns at the sound of the voice, still not quite used to her new title. It's Lord Royce that stands there, one of her most loyal of men, a man she considers herself lucky to have at her side. "I knocked, but..."

"My apologies," she smiles, tilting her head as she steps towards where the man stands. "I was so lost in thought, I didn't hear you."

The older man smiles and shakes his head, offering her a quick bow now that she faces him. "I don't mean to interrupt, it's just... This arrived just now." He holds out a letter to her which she takes, though at once she sees it isn't addressed to her, but to Jon. When Sansa looks up at him, Lord Royce nods. "It is for Lord Snow, but I thought you might wish to read it first." Sansa flips the letter over and she sees it; the Bolton seal.

Just like that, it's two years ago and she's standing in Winterfell, trembling as Ramsay raises his fist. Just like that, she's not strong, she's weak.

"Your grace?" Lord Royce is softly calling out to her, his hand warm when it gently touches her arm. She leaps from her mind and blue eyes snap back to the older man's face. "I'm sorry, I didn't think-" she can see the horror on his face and she softens, shaking her own head.

"It's fine." She says, swallowing down the fear that has jumped into her throat. "Perhaps Ramsay Bolton has written something that will interest us all," she goes on, walking around to behind the desk that sits just behind where she stands. "Send Jon to me, won't you? It's his letter and I will have him read it first. Then we shall decide what to do with the information inside, if anything at all." Lord Royce nods and then backs from the room with another bow, leaving Sansa alone once again with only her thoughts as a companion.

If she knows Ramsay, his letter will be full of threats, empty threats perhaps, but threats all the same. Not to mention... She thinks of Rickon kept in Winterfell's cramped, cold dungeon. He will die of the cold if they can't get to him soon, if Ramsay doesn't get to him first. Knowing what was done to her in Winterfell... What was done to Theon... Sansa shudders. She can't think about what could be or couldn't be happening to her baby brother. It would only drive her mad.

Jon doesn't take long to arrive, stepping into the room with a knock, though she's told him before he needn't bother. Behind him comes Brienne, Robb tucked carefully into her arms; Sansa smiles at the sight, her heart warming with the knowledge that her son has a guardian that no man in the world could defeat in a sword fight. Brienne might have pledged herself to her, but something tells Sansa that it is her son that has lay claim to Brienne's heart. Tormund and Edd come behind her and thats's when the door swings closed. "This has come for you," Sansa says without preamble, waving the still sealed letter for the room to see, though she passes it along to Jon. "From Ramsay." Jon's face darkens but she can see the surprise flicker across his face. "Open it."

He does. And then he begins to read.

"To the traitor and bastard Jon Snow, You allowed thousands of wildlings past the Wall. You have betrayed your own kind and you have betrayed the North. Winterfell is mine, bastard, come and see." Jon falls quiet, sparing a quick glance to Tormund before he goes on. "Your brother Rickon is in my dungeon. His direwolf's skin is on my floor, come and see." Another pause, for Sansa sucks in a breath and he can see as she curls her hands into fists atop her lap. "I want my bride back. Send her to me, bastard, and I will not trouble you or your wildling lovers. Keep her from me and I will ride North to slaughter every wildling man, woman, and babe living under your protection. You will watch as I skin them living. You will-" He stops, he cannot finish, he cannot read aloud the words that are written there.

"Go on." It's Sansa, a quiet command. He can't even open his mouth and so she leans over the desk, snatching the parchment his hands. Only he can see the quiet fury in her eyes, the silent anguish that threatens to overflow. "You will watch as my soldiers take turns raping your sister. You will watch as my dogs devour your wild little brother. Then I will spoon your eyes from their sockets and let my dogs do the rest. Come and see." She tosses the letter down atop the desk and leans back in her chair, raising her gaze to meet Jon's.

"Why does he write to me?"

"Either he's yet to hear about you, or he doesn't believe the rumors." She says, sitting up a little bit straighter, believing the latter. By now, the rumors of Jon's true parentage and the building of their army to reclaim Winterfell surely had reached him. And there was little chance that he had not heard about the declaration of her queenship. Despite it all, he still wrote to Jon, as if none of it were true. "Despite being legitimatized, Ramsay can't stand that he was born a bastard, and so he hates them all because of it. He means to insult you. To frighten you into submission." Her mind turns back to Rickon and she closes her eyes for a long moment before she opens them again and rises to her feet. "What do we do now? The longer we wait to attack, the longer Rickon is in his hands. He'll die soon if we don't do something."

Jon is staring back at her, his Stark colored eyes sharper than usual. "We will get him back, Sansa." He speaks with a confidence he isn't certain he feels. "I will write back, I will meet with him." She opens her mouth to protest but he shakes his head, silencing her before she can speak. "Perhaps we can solve this without bloodshed." In his mind, he's already begun to formulate the plan that might save more lives than it loses by the end of things.

She opens her mouth again, but she thinks better on it and after another moment gives a nod. "I trust you," she says simply, a wane smile curving on her lips. Jon leans over the desk to give her a quick kiss, a hand sliding into place against her cheek as he gently rubs his thumb along the length of her bottom lip, still warm from the touch of his.

"I won't let you down."

And she knows it.

[ x x x ]

"You don't have to be here."

Sansa turns her gaze towards Jon, who sits on his horse beside hers, waiting at the meeting spot for Ramsay, who they can both see approaching from over the hill. "Yes I do." Is all she says, tightening her grip on the reins, fingers icy cold despite the thick gloves that she wears. Her white mare shifts, as if she too can sense the discomfort of her rider, and somewhere behind them, Ghost howls.

Ramsay and his small entourage come to a stop just several feet from theirs and Sansa sucks in her breath as the man that tortured her for months levels his gaze with hers. His lips curve with a malicious sort of smile, one she's seen numerous times before. One she knows means danger. "My beloved wife," he greets as if he is the doting husband and not a monster in man's clothing. "I have missed you terribly all this time." His gaze shifts from her to Jon, eyes narrowing somewhat, though his mouth has yet to lose it's grin. "Thank you for returning Lady Bolton to me. Now," he pauses, smile vanishing, his dark eyes never once wavering in their gaze. "Get off your horse and kneel before me. Beg my forgiveness for stealing away my bride and raising an army against me. Name me the true Warden of the North and I will pardon you for all your transgressions, treasonous as they may be." He smirks now, as if he thinks he's got the upper hand, as if he thinks he's already won this battle. "I will even pardon these treasonous lords who have betrayed my house in your name. I will forgive you for the viscous lies you spread of your birth just to garner their support. And my sweet wife, I won't even punish you for allowing them to call you their queen." For a moment he turns his eyes back to her, surprised to see she glares at him with eyes sharper than any blade. This is not the young woman he recalls. "You don't have the numbers like I do, you don't even have Winterfell." Despite the support they've gotten, it was true that their army did not quite equate to the one Ramsay has. "Come bastard, there's no need to send your men to slaughter. There is no need for a battle." He's turned his attention back to Jon and once again, he smirks, confident that any moment Jon will slide from his horse and kneel before him.

Instead, Jon remains there in his saddle, watching as a cold fury crosses Ramsay's features. "Aye, you're right." Jon finally speaks, nodding his head as his horse shifts beneath him. "There's no need for a battle. Thousands of men don't have to die." Beside him, Sansa listens carefully, for these words are not what she thought she might hear Jon say. The truth was, he'd not revealed to her what he had planned to say to Ramsay here at this meeting, but something told her he knew exactly what he was doing. She trusted him and so she continued to listen. "Only one of us." She turns her head to him then, eyes rounding in her shock. Across from them, Ramsay's face changes, something like worry and surprise flitting across his features. "Let's finish this the old fashioned way. You and me."

At the sound of laughter, Sansa turns back to Ramsay, who is nervously chuckling at the words Jon has just spoken. "I keep hearing stories about you bastard," he says when he's sobered, shaking his head. "The way the people in the North talk about you, it's as if you're the greatest swordsman who's ever lived." He's heard those rumors- that there wasn't a man out there that could take Jon Snow down. "Maybe I would beat you, maybe I wouldn't." He shrugs, as if it means little to him. "But what I do know, is my army would crush yours."

Now they know, now they all know- Ramsay Bolton is afraid.

Jon ducks his head to hide the smile that's surfacing; he had not thought things to fall into place so easily. "Aye, you have the numbers to beat us," he replies, raising his gaze back up to meet Ramsay's. "But will your men want to fight for you when they learn you wouldn't fight for them?" A silence descends among them and Jon knows he has him right where he needed him to be. There would be nothing Ramsay could say that would stop the seeds of doubt from running rampant among his men.

Again Ramsay laughs, as if it matters not what he's just said to him. Truth was, a cold sense of dread was filling him up. "You're good. Very good." He's glancing left and right at the men that surround him, wishing for just one moment that he'd chosen different men to bring. These Umber's and Manderly's were only loyal because he held Winterfell- but their loyalty was fleeting, as was many of the men beneath him. He knows he must try something else to get Jon Snow where he needed him. "Will you let your little brother die because you're too proud to surrender?"

For the first time, it's Sansa that speaks.

"How do we know you have him?" She asks, not once looking away as Ramsay turns his eyes upon her instead. His mouth twitches with a smile and he looks to the man on his left, giving a quick nod of his head. They all watch as the man pulls the head of a direwolf from his saddlebag and tosses it onto the ground between them. Sansa blinks but she does not speak; she can't, she can't. No, she thinks, I am stronger than this. Ramsay opens his mouth to speak, but she cuts him off. "You're going to die tomorrow, Lord Bolton. Sleep well."

Then she's gone, urging her horse away from the scene.

"She's a fine woman, your sister," Ramsay says when she's gone, that malicious smile returning. Jon's lips curl with a scowl, but he doesn't reply. "I look forward to having her back in my bed, even if she's been used by you like the rumors say." It takes every ounce of his self control not to leap from his horse and drive Longclaw straight through his fucking heart. "If you change your mind bastard, send word. Otherwise... I will see you upon the battlefield."

And then he too is gone.

[ x x x ]

The firelight bathes her, casting a golden glow to her ivory skin, illuminating her like a goddess.

He sits on the edge of the bed, watching her as she slowly comes towards him, sinking into his arms when he opens them wide. Her mouth is on his, capturing him in a kiss that would have surely knocked him off his feet had he been standing. When he breaks the kiss, it's to catch her face between his palms, committing to memory the softness of her skin, the glimmer of her eyes, everything and anything that he can. The way that she's looking at him, he knows she's doing the same. "I'll come back to you, you know." He assures her softly, knowing her worries without her even saying them aloud.

A smile tugs at her lips as she leans in, forehead against his. "I know." She speaks softly, a hand sliding into his curls. Curls that one day their son will wear, too. A day she looks forward to perhaps more than any other. Jon's arms tighten their hold upon her and as he gently draws her down onto their bed, his lips find hers. She doesn't even know she's crying until Jon kisses the tears from her cheeks, tender and sweet.

This is the moment she'll hang onto. This is the moment she won't ever forget.

[ x x x ]

Dawn breaks and there is a stillness to the air; the calm before the storm.

The sky is clear of clouds, streaked instead with the colors of sunrise, pink like her lips, crimson like her hair. She is everywhere. The wind is the whisper of her voice against his skin, the rising sun is the warmth of her smile. He closes his eyes and breathes in, slow and deep, the image of her as he'd left her only moments ago, asleep in their bed, coming to his whirling mind. And baby Robb, too, who had slept peacefully in his cradle in the room, not even stirring when Jon had brushed a hand across his soft dark hair.

He opens his eyes and in the distance is Winterfell, the Bolton flags waving in the wind; soon, those would fall.

"Ready, little crow?"  It's Tormund there at his side, Edd close behind. Their army has gathered, the various heads of the houses speaking to their people, giving them perhaps words of encouragement before the battle begins. Jon spares him a glance, a chuckle, and then a nod. "The queen is with the big woman, littler crow, too." He goes on, having only just left their sides a few moments ago. Jon feels his heart grow warm as it always does when he thinks of the relationship Tormund has built with Sansa and their son; he is grateful for those who offer them protection, for if something... If anything...

"If anything happens to me, take care of her, won't you?" Jon asks, turning to face the two men at his side. "Protect her. And Robb, too." He holds fast to their gazes and it takes only a moment for both men to nod. When he turns back to face front, they all can see Ramsay's army has begun it's approach and it is not the army they had perhaps expected to see him bring.

"It worked, eh?" Edd asks with a smirk, his eyes drifting along the lines of men. "Two thousand or so, you reckon?" Jon nods, knowing that there was no doubt his army now outnumbered the one Ramsay had boasted of only the morning before.

"Even the most loyal beast will turn on its master if it's not treated right," Jon says, knowing his words from the day before had not fallen on deaf ears. It was clear that Ramsay's decision to not stand up for his men and protect them from this battle had sent his men from him. He had no additional troops to rally to his side and now most certainly, he would be on the losing side of this battle. "It's time." He says, turning back towards the lines of soldiers he's mustered together, the men that will fight for Sansa, for Winterfell, for House Stark.

When he turns back, it's to draw Longclaw from its sheath. "For the North!" He bellows, thrusting his sword into the air, the men behind him cheering the words back. "For the Queen!" Again, the troops shout and hold their fists, their swords, high into the sky.

And then...

The battle begins.

[ x x x ]

In the end, it's thousands of men that choose not to fight for Ramsay.

Though he didn't know it at the time, some had deflected to Jon's army that very first night, some even the morning of battle. In the end, Ramsay's forces were crushed and then driven back... Back until there was no choice but to surrender.

When it's over and he stands at the edge of the battlefield, looking out at the dead, his heart is somber. Despite believing in what he was doing, it made killing no less easy. Not when it was Northern men who only fought against him because it was what they were told to do. Footsteps approach and when he turns, it's Tormund there, bloodied and bruised, but alive. Somewhere out there, Edd too was well, searching the field for survivors along with a few of the wildling men. "Bring her to me, won't you?" He asks and Tormund nods, needing to ask no further questions.

"What will you do with him?" Tormund asks before he goes, gesturing towards Ramsay Bolton that sits in chains just a short distance from where they stand. The man is bloody, beaten, his face swollen from the perhaps several punches Jon had landed before deciding it was not his place to take the man's life. And so he'd left him a bleeding mess on the ground, teeth knocked from his gums, nose broken, commanding the nearest man to bring him the chains that now encircled his wrists and ankles.

"It's for her to decide." Jon says, turning back to face Tormund who nods. "I have to find Rickon," he goes on, turning away only then. "Bring her to Winterfell, bring her home." He says over his shoulder and then he's running.

Running faster than he's ever run in all of his life.

Through the gates and into the courtyard, already full of frightened servants come to see the end results of the battle; one maid gives a little scream when she sees Jon rushing through, another drops to her knees in prayer, in sheer relief.

But he cares little for any of them, there is only one thing he cares about and that's finding Rickon. He rushes through the courtyard towards the door that leads down into the dungeons that Winterfell holds. Down the stone steps, nearly tripping over them in his haste to reach the bottom, Jon shouts his little brother's name. He pauses in the center of the long, dark corridor, breathing hard as he listens for any response. "Rickon!" He calls again, fear making him shiver as there comes no response.

Until...

"Hello?" It's a timid voice, a voice torn between boy and man. His heart skips a beat at the sound of it, coming from the cell just two from where he stands. Jon swallows against the lump in his throat as he peers into the bars of the cell, where Rickon now stands, probably just having got up from the cold stone floor. He's grown tall, thin perhaps from his time in captivity, but he is built like Sansa- like a willow tree. His Tully touched curls are long and unruly, desperately in need of a cut, but he can see the curls fall in the same way Robb's once had. He's right there then, hands grasping the iron bars, staring out at Jon, blinking as if he's trying to assure himself that he isn't dreaming. "J-Jon, is that you?" The boy speaks, quiet and tired, a voice of someone who isn't ready to believe that any of this could be real.

"Aye, it's me, Rickon. It's me and you're safe now." Tears are threatening to fill his eyes and so he blinks against them, his hand reaching out to gently touch the boy's, his skin cold to the touch. "Let me get you out of here," he glances down the hall and sure enough, there are the dungeon keys hanging on a peg on the wall, the same place they'd been kept since he was a boy playing down here with Robb. When he's grabbed them, he wrenches open the iron door and Rickon is in his arms, crying, laughing, clutching at the older brother he thought he might never see again. Jon wraps him in his arms, leaning over to press a kiss to the top of his curls. "Let's go get you warmed up," he hefts the boy up into his arms, unable to help but recall that first day Sansa had shown up at Castle Black- pale and cold, broken but not destroyed. Not entirely. Rickon seems thin and cold, but he seems unharmed for the most part, and Jon can only thank the old gods and even the new ones for perhaps protecting the youngest of the Stark's.

He carries him up out of the damp darkness of the dungeon and into the courtyard, where more people have gathered. Survivors of the battle litter the space, all soldiers from various houses, some bowing their heads in respect for the man that carries his little brother from the darkness and into the light, more falling to their knees in fealty of the man they know they will someday call king, be it of the Iron Throne or the North. But he moves past them all, carrying Rickon through the set of double doors that open up into the main corridor, the closet room to him the great hall. It's been years and years since he stepped foot into this place, into Winterfell, but his feet know the way as if he'd never even left.

The hall is blazing with firelight, for which he is thankful. He brings Rickon close as he dares and gently sets him on his feet, dragging a chair up for the boy a moment later. "Sit, warm yourself," he commands softly, a hand to his brother's head as the sound of footsteps fill his ears. He thinks it will be Sansa and Tormund, but he's surprised to see an old woman there, a woman he recalls from childhood. It's Agatha, perhaps the oldest of the servants in Winterfell now, that comes towards them, a blanket already in her hands. She silently offers it to Jon, who takes it and turns so he might drape it over Rickon's shoulders.

"Is she coming?" Agatha asks, softly, and Jon knows at once who she means. When he nods, tears fill her eyes and she smiles. "I have prayed for her everyday since she came here to marry that Bolton," she whispers, thinking back to the girl she had once served, to the girl who had endured so very much. "House Stark has come back to Winterfell." Agatha whispers before she curtsies to Jon and steps from the room, murmuring about the food she will have prepared for the entire castle.

Jon can't help but to smile and when he turns back to Rickon, the boy is staring after Agatha, his eyes wide. "What is it?" He asks, sinking down til he's at eye level with him.

"She fed me extra, she would sneak me food even though Ramsay forbid it." Rickon says softly, recalling the times Agatha would creep into the dark dungeon just to bring him an extra portion of supper, waiting until he finished eating to take the dishes back, to ensure they were never caught. Jon turns back to glance at where Agatha had once stood, knowing there was little he could do to repay the kindness that woman had shown Rickon, and most likely Sansa when she too had been a captor here. "She didn't come last night and I was worried." Jon smiles again and ruffles the boy's hair, rising back up to his full height.

"There is nothing you must ever worry about again." Jon says softly, peering down into the boy's blue eyes, ones that are shaped as Sansa's are, but not quite the same shade of color. "We're going to be a family again." Rickon holds fast to his gaze and after several long, silent moments, he nods.

[ x x x ]

She's never rode faster in all of her life.

Urging her horse on, Sansa rides through the gates of Winterfell with Tormund close behind. In the courtyard stands various people and she can hear their gasps and shouts as she brings her mare to a stop. But she cannot stop for them, she cannot speak to them. Not yet. And though people cry out their joy for her, she runs past them all, skirts clutched in her fists as she goes up the stone steps and pushes past the double doors to rush inside.

"In there."

Sansa turns to her right at the sound of the voice, surprised to see Agatha standing there, the old maid she's known since her birth. "In the great hall," she points down the corridor to the left, where the room is housed. "They're waiting for you, my lady." In the coming days, she would learn to call the young woman by her true title but for now, she can't help but to call her the one she's always known her as. "Welcome home, Lady Stark." The redhead smiles and then she's gone, dashing off down the hall, disappearing through the doors to the great hall only a moment later. Agatha smiles and takes to the stairs behind her, where upstairs maids have already begun to clean and change the lord's rooms, now to certainly be called the queen's rooms.

The doors to the great hall feel heavier than she recalls, but she pushes them open and steps inside, swallowing down the lump of emotions rising into her throat. There, settled just before the hearth, wrapped in a blanket and spooning soup into his mouth, is Rickon. The little boy raises his face, as does Jon who sits beside him, blue eyes widening at the sight of her standing there. "Rickon..." She whispers her little brother's name, tears already beginning their descent down her cheeks as she takes a single step closer to where he sits. Rickon is rising up then, setting his soup aside, the blanket falling from his shoulders to the floor. He has grown tall, his face lost of its childlike plumpness and she's stricken by the resemblance to herself in him. To their mother. Something between a sob and laugh escapes her as he rushes into her arms and she sinks to the floor with him wrapped in her embrace. And she might never let him go, in truth.

Jon watches the scene between sister and brother, smiling, yet again choked up on his own emotion. It was as Agatha had said, the Starks had come back to Winterfell, and they would never leave again.

[survivorwakea]

Episode 7: “I just don’t think that makes sense” - Jared

Hello Elmo - welcome to your tape. We once again meet in an org. I was very excited to 1. make merge 2. to meet up with u in another org and to have the chance to work with you. However my excitement was almost immediately ruined. I asked if you want to work together and was greeted with "if our plans align". This was my first red flag of a few tonight. "If" not hey lets make our plans align nd work together, just a sort of ok sure if it swings that way. So I said that to you, we should make them align. You replied with "kk." BITCH TF DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING. And then you're all like I'm so happy you made merge you deserve this. Ok whatever I know that's just you trying to change the subject, which you do a lot when you want to avoid things hmmm. Then we start discussing HvV nd I made a joke about you maybe fucking me over here after I said I trusted you...you left me on read....so I'm not just gonna sit there and take that. I was like ok I see where I stand with you. And you're like nooo I want us to work together but also if you think you wanna vote me out because it's best for your game then don't be afraid to do that ~ and trust me I'm not scared to vote you out. I did it once before, I'll do it again. You did say that wasn't you plotting against me, and I sure as fuck hope you meant that because my dumbass does want to work with you even if right now I feel similar to how I did before and like I'm not your closest person, which really did affect us I think oops. We love having no trust in a duo. I let this go because I fully understand that hey maybe things won't work out for us in this org, although I'm really hoping they do. Then you're like hey lets guess for the idol together. Okay sounds promising doesn't it? think again. Turns out you gave your guesses to Justin and Zack. I'm glad you did tell me this though because it shows there's a little bit of trust, but I am wondering where that puts me in all of this. How close are you to Justin and Zack? I adore you and if you do feel you need to vote me out then so be it, I respect that and there wont be any hard feelings, but don't think I won't fight you for this. Hopefully I am just reading too much into things and you are wanting to work closely with me. I do pray we end up working together, I plan on trusting you more even if I do feel right now that is going to be a risk, but it's one I am willing to take. I know you're an absolute social king. I am the social queen, a king needs a queen but a queen does not need a king. Remember that.

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YEEHAW BITCHES I MADE MERGE. Been to every tribal council so far, plan on being here until the final tribal council. I'm not a threat I swear.

I made it to merge! This is very exciting considering this is my first discord game and I can sorta function on it so thats good. I've had the pleasure of hardly participating in any challenges and only going to the joint tribal where Dean was voted out. I pretty much have no real relationships in the game since I haven't had to really count on anyone in a tribal. The good news is a lot of people were messaging me last night even those who I haven't had a chance to be on a tribe with yet like Chloe and Bodhi. Well...I've played with Bodhi in several other seasons before and I'm glad I have an excuse to talk to him again but I also know how cut throat he can be. The good news is that Johnny told me that Jared along with Bodhi, Joey, and Asya would potentially work with us. This is good. As long as people are interested that should at least keep people away from voting for me. I've also been reunited with Justin. We were on our first tribe together and I thought that we could work well together. There is also Ben and Elmo. I think I've done surprisingly well and being connected with those in the tribe despite my "inactiveness". Johnny is def my number one but I also don't want our games to be the same. I also have a lot of trust in Elmo and it doesn't look like he is as well integrated or at least maybe is a little UTR too. If it looks like Johnny and I are just making the same decisions, I think people may side with Johnny. So its important that I stay alert to new opportunities and make sure that I'm looking out for myself. I think I've been playing an UTR kind of game so far and I'd like to continue doing that. If people like me or at least don't mind having me around then no one will throw out my name as a target. I submitted my video for the talent challenge and just hope that I don't get negative comments.

I MADE MERGEEEEEE FUCKING FINALLY.

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I need to rely heavily on an outside social presence, I need to keep up the fact that I’m working to ensure a heavy background role. I have a lot of ORG experience, and I often want to draw from the best players that I know, and combine most of their unique gameplay qualities. A few examples I’m going to be using is Michael mepole’s strategy for Touchy Subjects when he puts all his positive answers on much bigger targets than him in order to create a narrative and slide into the background. TJP, one of my best friends outside of games plays a game built heavily on strategy and sociability, which while I’m at my new place, is giving me more flexibility to play games and work on my one big flaw: my social game. I said previously that in this game, I have nothing to lose, and EVERYTHING to gain. Survivor is the closest thing to being a good running back in football. Some running backs like Le’Veon Bell are very patient, and wait for holes to open up so they can explode. If I can have 15% of that patience in this game, the entire season will open up BEAUTIFULLY for me. It is absolutely imperative that I make sure Jared and Johnny are the two most vocal players in our alliance, because I have more freedom than anyone else in this game, having never made merge in an ORG game(Fuck you Trevino) before, the sky is the absolute limit. I need to keep others at bay, and kind of do what Ian did: build a wall and make it nearly impossible to have a social game with me.

Just found an advantage, so im pretty much a king. thanks lov u

i’m so annoy eeeeed

johnny really lost his vote for a legacy advantage that now serves literally no purpose so that’s sexy. now we (me, johnny, jared, bodhi, joey) have to depend on anabel and i guess lily for this vote. also they wanna kill chloe which is ugly and not what i want so like.

i know anabel doesn’t wanna kill chloe but that might just be because she’s a facebook person. anabel and myself both wanna vote lily and for some reason that’s just not translating to these people. like y’all want lily to be our extra vote but that could easily be chloe, especially when anabel is the one who can swing it in our favor and she wants lily out like.

anyways my alternate solution was just to vote out one of the facebook men. idc who. then we can get lily on board and probably chloe, and we don’t need anabels vote. like if y’all are so worried abt facebook people then what i’m saying makes sense. chloe has shown an interest in working with me and none of y’all have heard shit from the others so?

anyways i get mad when i don’t get my way so sorry for all the ugliness i know will follow after this,,,,, ur all beautiful except for stinky johnny and his stinky legacy advantage

so this is my first tribal ever, im immune, and thats super cute and hot and everything, but u know what’s cuter and hotter?? this bitch right here is ab to do somethin crazy and perhaps stupid but it’ll provide good television!!! jared johnny bodhi joey asya and maybe lily and all want me to vote chloe and i have said that im down w that. HOWEVER, elmo justin zack chloe and ben are voting joey and they think im doing the same. im a bit conflicted rn. i am thinking i want to go w elmo bc he’s the person i trust a lot, but i really need to talk to like johnny bc he can’t vote this round, and i also trust him a lot!!! so basically we’re looking at 5 voting chloe, 5 voting joey, and then me. and whatever i do is what happens. not really quite sure if this is a good position to be in, i have 11 ppl who think im with them and that ill do whatever they say, but im not really ab that... i just rly need to talk to johnny bc he’s the person who’s gonna give me answers and insight and everything i need but he’s at WORK and this rly sucks. stay tuned for my decision LOL

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idk if i mentioned this in my last one but... the condition for me voting joey is that chloe zack justin elmo and ben have to say it was lily and NOT me. if this works im going to pee myself..

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so everyone except zack knows ab my big huge plan and if he would JUST FUCKING GET ON i would love to tell him.... i feel like all this shit is so unnecessary for the first merge vote, but they started it. so if they’re gonna be crazy, i am gonna be crazier.  and that’s just the tea. putting on my big girl panties and walkin into tribal w a plan in my head, a smile on my face, and lies on my lips (wow that’s poetic)

this is copied from my thread but thats fine:

SO ANABEL SAYS TAHT SHE WANTS TO CALL! so we call and she drops a bomb that there is a big grp of tumblrs working together trying to get chloe out and im like hmm huh and she asks me not to tell anyone and im like thats fine i think that i convinced to anabel that she can flip to our side bc if she does that then joey should leave 6v5 bc johnny cannot vote i also convinced anabel to tell everyone on the other side aka FB + Ben side so now i dont have to tell them and i dont incriminate my alliance between anabel i think that if this works it would be so good for me... like even if chloe leaves i should be in a good position its much favorable if joey leaves but chloe leaving is not HORRIBLE for me that being said theres no way i would vote chloe out bc it doesnt make sense considering they are not even including me in the plan but yeah im kinda excited that my social game is snapping rn

UPDATE: i think that i got anabel to flip and i rly want chloe to stay now bc i think she'd rly wanna work w me if she gets saved. ZACK FLORES U BETTER NOT SELF VOTE OR ALL OF THIS WILL GO TO SHIT!

PRAYS TO HAWAIIAN GODS FOR THIS TO WORK.

OMGGGGG THIS IS CRAZY. queen anabel is honestly doing what i think will be the best thing for her game and informing us (me, elmo, justin, chloe, ben) what the rest of the cast is doing and voting out chloe. anabel a snake QUEEN and wants us to blame lilly after all of this and i am SO FOR THAT. i just hope anabel isnt really working with them and the other side plan on like blindsiding me or something. idk.. if joey winds up going home then this will be so good and i will love anabel so fucking much. all HAIL the snake queen! anabel legend. just pls dont be lying to me bc idk our call we just had did seem a lil quick and shit..

today i am voting out johnny. i hate the judges of the last challenge except for anna dad. anna dad is cool..

This round is crazy i wish i had recorded audio.

{ ok this is part is written today: i forgot that my confessional was so shitty last round. everything below this will be falsified confessional trying to get back into my head from last round }

So tonight chlohie should be leaving. We have majority but Joey is getting some votes too. It'll be 6-5 and joey will be safe. I would be totally shocked if Joey were to leave.  

What time is it? *clap clap* it's that time where I over share my feelings in here yeehawwwwww. So going into this tribal this morning, ya girl was nervous. It was quiet. Too quiet. The first name I hear is Joey, I'm kinda like oh no I like him but he's not too active so okay. As the day progresses and I'm still not hearing anything, the alarm bells start to go off a bit. I'm trying to tell myself I'm just being over paranoid, it's okay, I am fine, it's just a simple merge vote. All of a sudden I get Anabel rushing into my messages telling me she wants to call, I'm like ok cute bonding experience I'm here for it. Ben then in my messages saying to be prepared for the shit show that Anabel is about to tell me. I can feel my pulse rising I be looking like spongebob up in this bitch just shooketh. I call Anabel. She's like sis ur being targeted. Im like you're fucking kidding. Shocked but not surprised. Asya, who I thought was my homegirl, now up in this bitch wanting to vote me. People I been talking to all day being like wow I'm nervous be wanting to vote me. And why? Am I a threat? AM I REALLY A FUCKING THREAT? I been to every tribal council yea, but at the same time I'VE BEEN TO EVERY TRIBAL COUNCIL. PLEASE GIVE ME A BREAK AND STOP TARGETTING ME FOR 2 SECONDS. So where I think I stand right now - I'm working with Zack, Justin and Elmo hardcore. We have Asya, Bodhi, Joey, Lily and Jared on the other side. Then in the middle there's Ben and Anabel. But then Johnny I'm shitting myself about because I've no idea where he stands right now. If this goes to plan Joey will go home tonight instead of me. Watch yourself Asya, I thought we had each others back. You apparently just want to stab me in mine.

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just made like a pretty lengthy lowkey negative confessional. So here's a positive one. I've decided that I love Elmo again and I adore him fully as a person he makes me so so happy and I'm happy to actually have a shot at fixing out broken org relationship. He's fully one of my favouritest people I've ever met EVER. and I'm so so so happy I get to play with him again. Zack I also love so much, I feel we've never had the proper chance to connect but we kinda highkey doing it here and I want to go far with him. He always makes me smile no matter what. I just really really hope he's having fun. Justin I also love a lot, at first I was kinda unsure about him. He reminds me a lot of myself. But now I couldn't imagine this game without him. He is a strong player but I fully admire him. I'm glad I got to meet him for the first time ever in this game and I sure hope we continue to be friends even after it ends.

These 3 people make my little heart sing and although I'm not in the position I thought I would be in right now, part of me is glad. I think we're just going to be brought closer and I'm excited to see what future tribals hold for us.

DUDE CAN WE JUST VOTE OUT CHLOE SO I CAN ACTUALLY STAY

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Joey is voted out 6-5. He becomes the first member of the jury.