#that we could've died together peacefully of old age
Text
realising just how much of my overall stability relied on being able to regularly cuddle and hug and hold and also be hugged and held by my girlfriend
#plinking#and shes been in the hospital for the past two weeks likely with at least two weeks to go#been visiting her everyday since i knew because i legitimately dont know whens the last time I'll be able to see her#and theres so much more i can do to improve her immediate and future quality of life but ive been running energy deficits for so long it's#it's actually starting to affect my movement#been thinking of asking some friends to help with the first bit and have already acquired immediate consent from all fixed and tentative#parties but it still feels unloyal and greedy idk why#my gf had previously noted how much more reliant i was on physical touch than she was but still#used to fantasize about finding the eye of whatever god would let this happen to her and piercing through and ripping out what should'vebeen#that we could've died together peacefully of old age#but too tired lately to even think about that#and everything's saying that this'll only get more frequent as time passes. until she does#and it's only damage control from here on out. theres so many things i want to work on for her but it all costs so much time and money im#not sure I'll ever acquire. planning on getting training and certification for nursing once i get my degree to better take care of her but#not sure if I'll have enough time to.#im just. so tired#guh
1 note
·
View note
Last Seen Blogs
invadergarf
>_~☆
law-rel
Where my life begins
always-been-the-hunter
Mors Tua Vita Mea
dopedonkeykidpony
Untitled
dickiedickfan
Naamloos