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jessikahathaway · 4 years ago

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Baby Talk - Part II

Pairing: Jikook X Reader (Jimin X Reader X Jungkook)

Genre: Surrogacy!AU, Polyamorous!AU, Romance. (Future Smut)

Warnings: Profanity, medical procedures, pining (Like a stupid amount but what can ya do), Joon and Jin get protective, mentions of pregnancy symptoms. (If I forgot anything please let me know!)

Words: 10.5k (I guess I'm committing to long chapters lol)

You’d hit the four week mark, and not much had happened yet.

Despite you feeling like your hormones were on a swing.

Jimin was bewildered when he came into the bathroom to find you crying on the floor. Trying to comfort you went downhill quickly because soon you were mad that he was joking around. Then you were crying again, apologizing for being so harsh.

Up and down and up and down.

But they never got mad at you. Never yelled at you and never ignored you. But you forced your emotions down deep into your heart. A place that would be locked and the key thrown away. Because you knew what was happening, and it simply couldn’t happen.

It was late and you could feel your stomach begging for something to eat. You’d gotten really hungry lately, no doubt your body trying to accommodate for the new life you were growing inside of you.

So, you hurried to the kitchen under the guise of night and made some rice and a little bit of stir fry. You put together everything, making sure not to make too much, and started cooking.

It was around three in the morning when you sat down at the table and ate your food, looking through your phone with a bored expression. Nothing interesting on social media and YouTube videos were only entertaining for so long. So, you ate your food and cleaned up before starting to head back towards your room.

Then, a large flash went off in the sky, causing you to jolt and look out into the city. Rain was pelting against the window, sounding sharp to your ears. It was a little intimidating.

Then the loud crash of thunder rang through the house.

You yelped at the noise, covering your ears in fear. You’d never particularly liked thunderstorms, but this one was coming in hot and aggressive. You pulled your hands away from your ears, just trying to focus on getting back to your room when another flash lit up the room. Your heart was hammering in your chest and you started to sweat.

Before you could think too much about it you were knocking on Jungkook and Jimin’s door. Another crash of thunder roared through the house and you swear you felt the floor shake. You whimpered in fear and fidgeted with the hem of your shirt. Did they hear you? Or was the storm too loud? Should you go in? What if they weren’t decent?

Jimin had said you could go in if something was wrong...

But did being scared of a thunderstorm count?

FLASH.

BANG.

You couldn’t take it anymore and you burst through the door with tears in your eyes. Fear causing you to shake violently.

Jimin and Jungkook both bolted up in bed at the sound of the door slamming open, and were out of bed instantly at the sight of you shaking on the floor.

“Y/N? What’s going on? Are you alright? Are you hurt?” Jungkook’s worried voice echoed in your ear.

“She’s trembling,” Jimin said, rubbing your back.

“I-I I’m sc-”

FLASH.

BANG.

You cried and flung your arms around Jungkook’s neck, burying your face in his chest, tears streaming down your face as you shook violently. Jungkook looked at Jimin in shock and a little bit of his own fear, but Jimin just took his hand and placed it on your head.

‘Comfort her,’ Jimin mouthed.

Jungkook nodded before rubbing your hip soothingly.

“What’s wrong Y/N? Is it the storm?” He asked, bringing his other hand to your shoulder.

“Y-Yes,” you whimpered, keeping your face buried in Jungkook’s neck.

“It’s alright, Jimin and I got you. You’ll be safe,” Jungkook promised.

Jimin rubbed soothing circles onto your back as the two of them tried to ease your frantic heart. Both of them knowing it can’t be good for the baby. But, also, on you. The stress of carrying a baby was already a lot, the fear of this thunderstorm wasn’t a good addition.

Soon, you had cried yourself to sleep.

Jimin took you in his arms, picking you up and Jungkook followed after him as they headed for your room.

The couple laid you down in bed, brushing your face tenderly. Jungkook watched as Jimin covered you up, bringing the sheets right up under your chin. He smiled at the soft pout on your lips, he wondered if the baby would have your cute pout.

Jimin, moved your hair away from your eyes, tucking it behind your ear gently. When he was certain you were settled he took Jungkook’s hand and headed back to their bedroom.

“God, that scared the fuck out of me,” Jungkook said, sitting down on the side of the bed.

“Me too,” Jimin agreed, rubbing his face in exhaustion.

“Didn’t know she was that scared of storms, makes me want to beat up the sky for scaring her like that,” Jungkook said, frowning.

Jimin laughed lightly, but kissed his boyfriend lovingly. “I know you would if you could, or at the very least, sue it,” he snorted.

“Ooh, yeah, that could work,” Jungkook said.

“I’d never seen her like that, so vulnerable. She always puts up such a tough exterior,” Jimin said, biting his lip.

“Yeah, maybe it shows that she’s starting to trust us. I can’t imagine how hard it must be to live with two people who are kinda strangers to her,” Jungkook said, feeling awkward.

“Well, maybe we can fix that,” Jimin reasoned.

“What do you have in mind my stunningly attractive boyfriend?” Jungkook asked, leaning forward.

“Mmm, let’s take her shopping. Spoil her a bit, you’ve got more zeros in your bank account than I can count on all of my fingers. She’s gonna need maternity clothes anyways. Imagine her all dressed in Gucci and Prada while walking around pregnant with our baby,” Jimin said, appearing to be day dreaming himself.

“That would be... nice... To spoil her, show her we care about her well being and everything,” Jungkook nodded in agreement.

“Let’s do it,” Jimin said, gripping Jungkook’s hands.

“Okay, yeah!”

Unfortunately for the couple, you appeared to be hating every second of this shopping excursion.

“Y/N! Come on,” Jungkook said, walking with Jimin’s hand interlocked with his.

“Coming, coming,” you sighed, following after them.

“Y/N? Are you alright? Do you need a break?” Jimin asked, stopping to take a look at you.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just, sleepy,” you grumbled.

The boys had effectively cut off your caffeine intake as of late, and it was showing. You were more exhausted than ever, just wanting to sleep the day away, but the two men wanting to hear nothing of it today. Normally they would’ve just let you sleep, but, today was a different story.

Jimin bit his lip and looked at Jungkook with concern.

You didn’t seem to be having fun at all.

What was the point in spoiling you if you were just gonna wind up pissed off at the end of it? But maybe you just hadn’t found something you wanted yet. Jimin didn’t want to lose faith so early on, but you really were in a grumpy mood today.

Jungkook pointed out several different kinds of stores, suggesting different ones and you merely told them that whatever they wanted was fine. Feeling defeated already, Jimin told Jungkook to pick a store and maybe you’d find something you wanted in there.

Soon, you were in some high end designer store, looking around with a bored expression on your face. Most girls loved when you spoiled them, wanting nothing more than to have free reign with a credit card and a whole shopping mall. But you looked so fragile and out of place in this big store.

Jungkook looked around and found some things he wanted, Jimin too, but you were still sitting on the bench, head in your hand and looking tired.

The couple looked at each other, wondering what in the world they could do to make you smile. All they wanted to do was spoil you, make you feel better...

“Are you two with the young lady over there,” the store attendant asked, pointing at you with genuine curiosity.

“Ah, yes, she’s with us,” Jimin confirmed.

“I take it she’s not really into the whole shopping experience,” the attendant said, and the couple nodded sadly.

“We just wanted to spoil her, take her out and get her stuff she wanted. But it looks like she’d rather die than be here right now,” Jungkook said, frowning.

“Well, what are some things that she likes?” The shop attendant asked.

“Books,” both of them said quickly.

The attendant laughed at them softly, nodding.

“My wife is a fan of books too, sometimes I wonder if she likes them more than me. But, you said you want to spoil her right? Tell her that, explain what you’re doing, sometimes that helps,” he offered.

Jimin nodded, looking over at your sleepy figure in the corner of the store.

“It’s worth a shot,” he said.

The pair thanked the shop attendant for his time and headed towards you.

You looked up and tried to give the couple a smile, but it looked awkward and forced, making them frown even more. Jungkook sat down next to you, and Jimin kneeled in front of you.

“Y/N, do you know why we forced you out of your blankety cocoon today?” Jimin asked, looking at you with curiosity.

“You said you wanted to take me shopping,” you said, gazing back at him.

“Exactly, we wanted to take you shopping. Not just shop for ourselves and drag you around. We want to spoil you, give you whatever you want. All you have to do is ask and you can have it, Y/N, money isn’t an issue here,” Jimin said.

Biting your lip you felt yourself get uncomfortable. “I-I don’t really like being spoiled, you know? I um... It makes me feel weird,” you said, rubbing your neck.

“The last thing we wanted to do was make you upset,” Jungkook said, biting his lip.

“No I’m not upset I just feel awkward,” you explained.

“Oh, there’s no need to feel awkward Y/N, it’s just us,” Jimin reassured.

“People keep staring at us, like I’m some lame friend third wheeling on a date,” you sighed, rubbing your face.

Jimin and Jungkook both swallowed hard.

They hadn’t realized people were staring. But it would make sense, Jimin and Jungkook were known in the city and suddenly a girl is walking around with them? That did seem a bit odd. They were also regulars in this mall and no doubt the staff were looking too.

God, they had messed this whole day up.

“Oh Y/N, we’re sorry,” Jungkook said, pressing his hands to his face.

“Sorry? Sorry for what?” You asked, turning to look at him with confusion.

“Not including you,” Jimin explained.

“There’s no need to include me-” you started when Jungkook cut you off quickly.

“Yes there is, you’re carrying our baby, we want you to feel comfortable and safe. Not ignored and shut out, that’s not fair to you,” he said, brushing his hair away from his face.

“Yeah, we want you to have whatever you want. As long as it isn’t unhealthy for you or the baby,” Jimin said.

“This isn’t about flexing or whatever on other people, this is about you. And what you want,” Jungkook said.

“Well,” you said, worrying your lip with your teeth.

“Yes?” Jimin said, leaning forward.

“It’s, well, I guess some new clothes wouldn’t be bad. I’ll need maternity stuff,” you told them.

“Yes! Absolutely! We can do that!” Jimin said, standing up and pulling you with him.

However, it was a little too fast for you, causing your head to spin. Jungkook was steadying you with his warm palms on your waist, Jimin keeping you upright with his hands around your wrists.

“Sorry Y/N! I-I wasn’t thinking and I got so excited, sorry,” Jimin frowned at himself.

“It’s alright,” you said, not wanting him to be upset over something that didn’t really matter.

“I need to be more gentle with you, you’re carrying our baby for Christ sakes,” Jimin huffed.

You nodded, noticing the stern look on Jimin’s face. Licking your dry lips, you looked down at your feet. You were only a month along so you couldn’t really see anything yet. But knowing there was a life inside of you made you feel a little flutter in your chest every time you thought about it.

However, you needed to get that under control.

This wasn’t your baby.

And that’s just how it was going to be.

Jimin and Jungkook had managed to drag you into a designer store for mothers apparently, because everything in here looked like it was worth a fortune. How were you supposed to pick something and wear it when you were afraid it was gonna get dirty? For fucksake you were almost certain they would be ruined by the end of this pregnancy.

“Ooh! Y/N, pink is your color,” Jimin smiled, holding up a rose colored blouse at you.

Looking down you saw small daisies printed on the shirt as well. It was cute, you had to give him that. You agreed to try it on, but only if he promised not to show you the price tag. Jimin nodded quickly.

Jungkook came around the corner, carrying a couple different articles of clothing. Mainly dresses, as they would be a comfortable and easy choice. But there were some skirts and blouses in his arms too. After finding the ones you liked the three of you were sent to the dressing rooms.

Jimin and Jungkook waited outside on the bench, demanding a fashion show from you. You rolled your eyes, but didn’t say no before you headed in and tried on a couple of outfits.

You walked out and did a little spin every time, Jungkook and Jimin giving their opinions. Which were always small claps with whistles accompanying them.

Then you walked out in a shorter green sundress that you had managed to grab on the shelf without looking at the tag, thank God. It was green with splashes of turquoise and white that made your eyes pop beautifully. There was a cutout at the top that showed a little bit of cleavage but it wasn’t an insane amount. Nothing you thought anything of anyways.

It came to your knees, and it was generous with the room in it. No doubt when you were showing it would come up to your mid thigh. Fluffing your hair you walked out and smiled at the boys. Jungkook’s eyes trailed down your body. This was the first non maxi dress you’d tried on, even the skirts had been considerably modest. So, they were getting the first glimpse at your skin.

Jimin was stunned.

You were absolutely gorgeous. A vision.

Legs looking gorgeous and long, skirt fluttering around your knees but Jimin couldn’t help imagine you when you were showing a little more. Would it ride up higher? Clearing his throat he smiles at you.

“It looks really good, Y/N, I didn’t pick this one. Did you Kook?” Jimin said, turning to his boyfriend, who seemed to still be in a stupor.

“Jungkook?” You said, looking at the doe eyed man with a little bit of worry pinching your features.

“Yes? No, it-you look amazing Y/N, did you pick this out?” He asked you.

“I did, yeah,” you answered.

“Little sneak, do you really want to stop our hearts?” Jimin teased.

Blushing you brushed your hair behind your ear and stared at your shoes. Jungkook looked at you with so much longing it made Jimin’s heart stammer. Not out of jealousy, but something else. Jimin shook the thought from his head.

Soon you were all settled back in the car, several shopping bags in the back. Jimin and Jungkook had requested a driver today, wanting to just enjoy the experience. So, the driver dutifully drove while the three of you sat in the back.

You looked out the window and watched scenery pass you by. Jimin and Jungkook looked at you, each with a similar look on their face and similar feelings in their chest. But neither of them were brave enough to admit it to themselves. Not when they almost had everything they’ve ever wanted, or what they thought they wanted...

Getting out of the car, Jimin asked the driver to have the bags delivered up to their apartment. The driver nodded before disappearing.

The three of you made your way up to the apartment, but not before Jimin and Jungkook spilled that they had a surprise for you. Looking at them with a menacing glare, Jungkook broke first as you three made it into the entryway of the apartment.

“It’s nothing crazy, just... We didn’t want you feeling like the third wheel or, you know, not a part of this. You are just as important to us as the baby you are carrying, and while you’re with us we want you happy and... so we got you this,” Jungkook said, holding out the signature blue box that made your stomach churn with how much it must’ve cost.

“Please, don’t ask how much it cost. It doesn’t matter as long as it makes you happy,” Jimin whispered.

Slowly, you opened the box and a beautiful moon pendant sparkling in diamonds and white gold stared at you. You damn near dropped the thing because of how gorgeous it was. Jungkook and Jimin froze on the spot when they saw tears starting to fall down your face.

“Do you not like it?” Jimin asked.

“Is it too much? Did we go overboard?” Jungkook worried.

“N-No, it’s beautiful,” you said, touching the pendant with a delicate finger.

“Do you want to put it on?” Jungkook asked, hoping to God that you didn’t throw this pendant back in their faces.

“Yes, please,” you said, handing Jungkook the back and brushing your hair out of the way so he had access.

Slowly, you watched as the beautiful moon swung just above your cleavage, kissing your chest lightly. It was fastened behind your neck and you turned around, looking at the two men with a bright smile on your face.

Then, they held up their wrists.

A sun and a star.

You looked and saw it was all a matching set.

“You guys, you really,” you said, smiling softly.

“Honestly, Y/N, you’re our equal in this. You aren’t just a womb we’re renting,” Jimin said. “You’re a person, with wants and feelings and we want you to feel that. More than anything, we want you happy and safe.”

“We’re so thrilled you chose us, seriously. If there’s anything you want, anything you need, name it, we’ll get it for you. Scouts honor,” Jungkook said, holding up his hand.

Feeling an overwhelming sense of emotion, more tears ran down your cheeks, making you sniffle and wipe at them with irritation. You didn’t want to cry right now, you were happy! Now, you just looked like a snotty red mess.

“Aw, don’t cry Y/N!” Jungkook said, coming forward to wipe your tears.

“God you guys are such turds, making me cry all the time,” you sniffled.

“It’s not our fault!” Jimin said.

“It is very much your fault,” you said, holding your stomach gently.

A rush of air left the two of them at you doing something so maternal. It made Jungkook’s blood burst into flames, and Jimin had to swallow a moan at the knowledge of you being pregnant with his baby. You cocked your head to the side and looked at the two silent men.

“Okay, well... Thanks for today you two... I’m glad I got to be spoiled a little bit. I’m gonna go take a shower, are we ordering out for dinner tonight?” You asked. They were still silent and you wondered what the fuck broke them when Jimin blinked rapidly a few times before clearing his throat.

“Y-You’re welcome, if you want to go again just tell us and we can,” he said, fighting to keep his calm exterior.

“Okay, I’m gonna go take a shower then,” you said again, taking off towards the stairs.

Jungkook damn near collapsed on the floor when you were finally gone.

“Jesus,” he said, panting hard.

“Do you, do you feel it too?” Jimin asked, gazing at the area where you had been standing.

“Yeah,” Jungkook croaked.

“Fuck what’s wrong with us? She’s here for us to care for her, to nurture her, not use her like some object,” Jimin said, running his hands through his hair in frustration.

Jungkook rubbed his shoulders, trying to soothe his boyfriend’s frantic thoughts. He agreed. You weren’t someone for them to use and abuse... You were the mother of their child and you deserved to be respected. But God if the thought of you didn’t send their minds spiraling.

“I know... We just gotta tough it out I guess. What else can we do?” Jungkook reasoned.

“I don’t know Kook, I don’t know,” Jimin said, gripping his boyfriend’s hand tightly.

—

The six week mark came and so did the morning sickness. To start, it was just waves of nausea, but soon it turned into full blown vomiting.

It was around seven in the morning and you had barely slept a wink. You felt jittery and restless, unable to relax. But when you sat up to head to the kitchen for something to eat, your stomach flipped. Soon, you were in the bathroom getting sick in the toilet.

Shortly you heard a knocking at the door.

“Y/N? Sweetie are you alright?” Jimin’s worried voice echoed through the door.

“Yeah,” you wheezed, trying to keep yourself from hurling again.

“Can I come in?” His light tone echoed through the room.

“Yeah,” you said, feeling another rush of nausea washing over you as he comes in. You looked and saw his worried face come into focus.

“Oh sweetheart,” Jimin said, rubbing your back as you got sick once more.

“Jimin? Y/N?” Jungkook’s voice echoed in the apartment.

“We’re in the bathroom Kook!” Jimin yelled.

Shortly Jungkook’s footsteps came into the bathroom. He was frowning, knowing you must be uncomfortable and there wasn’t much he could do for you. Watching Jimin rub your back gave him a sense of comfort however.

You were struggling with your chest being tender also. Every time you moved against the toilet you felt a jolt of pain go down your spine. Wincing when you came back up, Jimin had gotten you a little cup of water. You swished the cool liquid around before spitting it out and standing up slowly, per Jimin’s instructions.

You brushed your teeth and told the boys you were alright. They left and you did the rest of your morning routine. Jimin came back into your room and asked if you were ready for breakfast. You nodded and let Jimin lead you to the kitchen table. Jimin, taking note of your poor start to the day, asked if you wanted anything in particular for breakfast. Thinking back you really enjoyed the Nutella and banana toast he made for you a while back.

He nodded and started the toaster quickly. Jungkook had been working overtime recently and had to leave shortly after your bathroom incident. Soon, two pieces of Nutella toast with bananas were placed in front of you.

But the second the smell of banana hit your nose, you were scrunching up your face in disgust. Jimin looked at you with confusion. Then it dawned on him: food sensitivity.

Quickly removing the plate he asked if anything else sounded good, and you came up with the weird combination that was scrambled eggs with cream cheese.

Jimin looked on with a light smile on his face as you scarfed down the eggs and cream cheese without a single nose scrunch. It always made him happy to see you eating. Keeping up your health for the sake of the baby and you made him happy.

Soon, you were done and Jimin had gone into the living room to watch some TV when you noticed him sitting there. Lounging on the couch was a normal thing, but, looking at him now you-you couldn’t put your finger on it. He just looked so good, sitting there. He’d recently redid his hair so it was a beautiful blond color. His eyes wandered from the television to you, standing there in your loose t-shirt and pajama shorts.

He licked his lips for a moment, but that was all it took for you.

The flash of his tongue made you slightly weak in the knees, causing you to grip the edge of the table for support. Jimin seemed to mistake this for a more serious problem as he was up in a matter of seconds to come to your side.

“Y/N? What’s the matter?” He asked, looking at you with concern.

“I-I’m good,” you said, giving him a thumbs up. “I think I just ate too fast.”

Jimin mulled this over in his head for a moment before nodding and stepping back.

“As long as you’re okay,” he said, heading back towards the couch.

But your symptoms weren’t just limited to food sensitivity, morning sickness and random bouts of arousal, oh no... The best one was the nightmares that had taken over your sleep schedule.

Normally they were just vague things that you forgot about when you woke up. But they were becoming more vivid. More, unsettling.

You were dreaming being in pools of blood, sometimes it was yours, sometimes it belonged to the boys. Sometimes you didn’t know where it came from, but it was always there. Never to be washed away, only to drown in...

You were caught up in the throes of a particularly bad nightmare...

You’d miscarried and lost the baby, Jimin and Jungkook were heartbroken and left you bleeding out on the floor as you stared up into the ceiling, dying.

The room was tilted and everything was wobbly.

You tried to go after them, to ask for another chance. But it was too late, they were gone.

Screaming, you bolted up in your bed. Tears flowing down your cheeks at a rapid rate. Your heart was hammering in your chest so loud you swore you could feel it in your throat.

You heard the slamming of a door and soon Jimin and Jungkook barged into your room, looking around frantically until they found you on your bed, shaking and crying into your hands.

“Y/N!” They yelled, going to your sides and trying to get you to talk to them.

“Sweetie, what happened? Why did you scream?” Jimin asked, petting your hair trying to soothe you.

“I-I had a nightmare, I-I lost the baby and, then lost you two,” you whimpered, covering your face again.

Jungkook swallowed thickly, the image of you crying being burned into his memory. He hated seeing you like this. It hurt him to see you so distraught. Jimin, too, was struggling with your emotions. He just wanted you happy and healthy, free from any worry and troubles of the real world. But of course, he couldn’t protect you from everything and everyone. No matter how much he wanted to.

“Y/N, it’s okay. We’re right here, we aren’t going anywhere,” said Jungkook. You were crying violently, looking at the bed spread with blurred vision. Jimin looked at Jungkook with worry written all over his features, your smaller frame sat shaking in the bed as the two males tried to comfort you.

Jungkook hesitantly reached out to wipe the tears from your face. You looked up at the man with puffy cheeks and swollen eyes, before glancing back down at your lap.

“You aren’t going to lose us, Y/N,” Jimin reassured.

“I’m scared,” you whispered, so broken that it had both of their eyes tearing up at the sound.

“It’s alright, we’re scared too,” Jimin said, patting your hair gently. “But we’ll get through this.”

“There was so much blood,” you whimpered, biting your lip trying to keep the sobs from coming out.

“Y/N,” Jungkook said, feeling his eyes burning with unshed tears of his own.

“I was dying and you just... left me there,” you confessed.

“We could never leave you just like that Y/N, ever,” Jimin said, sounding shocked.

“We’d never forgive ourselves if something happened to you,” Jungkook whispered.

Jimin grabbed his hand, rubbing his fingers over the knuckles. He knew seeing you like this was hard on both of them, and knowing how much you truly didn’t think they cared was also hurtful. Because all they wanted was to tell you you didn’t have to leave... But it couldn’t work like that.

Jimin’s work as a high end therapist was already wobbly because of his relationship with Jungkook. As unfortunate as it is, people didn’t want his help if he was dating a fellow man.

And Jungkook had already been shamed for his love publicly, the gossip forums on the newspaper and websites having a hay day with his image. He’d worked so hard to show he wasn’t any different than a straight man when it came to his work. But, the world is a cruel place, and social norms often reared their ugly heads with Jungkook.

They couldn’t drag you into that cesspool of nasty comments and uncomfortable encounters. It was a harsh reality, but it was the one you were all living in. And there wasn’t anything they could do about it.

Jungkook wanted to scream about how it was unfair. How you sitting here with them wasn’t wrong, as long as you all cared about one another, how could it be? But they both knew how this would end.

With you walking out of their lives and your child’s life, forever.

“I’m sorry for waking you up,” you hiccuped, swallowing down the rest of your tears.

“No, don’t be sorry,” Jimin said, rubbing your shoulder.

“If something’s wrong we want you to tell us,” Jungkook said, looking at you with misty eyes.

“I-I will,” you said, wiping your face.

“Are you going to be able to go back to sleep?” Jimin asked, looking at your state with concern.

“I should be able to,” you said, trying to convince yourself of the same thing.

“We can stay with you, until you’re asleep,” Jungkook offered before even thinking. Jimin’s head snapped to the younger male, who was already shrinking.

“W-Would you?” Your soft voice spoke up.

Jimin nodded finally, crawling into the bed with you and Jungkook following suit. They each took a hand and held it tightly. Jimin drew different shapes and patterns on your palm, making you giggle when it tickled. Jungkook interlocked your fingers together, running his thumb over your soft skin like Jimin did with him when he was nervous or scared.

Sooner, rather than later, you were passed out once more, hands clutching Jimin and Jungkook’s.

The men managed to untangle themselves from you as they went back to their room, hearts heavy. When the door shut, Jungkook burst into tears.

“Oh my sweet boy, don’t cry,” Jimin said, wiping his boyfriend’s cheeks carefully.

“Jimin,” he said, forehead resting on the older man’s shoulder.

“I know, it hurts me too,” Jimin whispered.

“I just want her to know that she’s not just a convenience, she’s so much more than that,” Jungkook whimpered.

“Yeah,” Jimin said, thinking of your body curled up on the couch with a good book and a warm drink next to you. Your smile when your favorite song comes on in the car. The way you’re already so protective over the baby.

“I don’t know if it’s because she’s carrying our baby or what, but, I want to be closer to her. I want to know everything about her... God I don’t know what to do with myself Jimin,” Jungkook complained, wiping at his tears in frustration.

“We just gotta keep it in our mind that she had a life before this, and she’ll have a life after it too. S-She’s doing this because we’re paying her Jungkook. Of course that isn’t the only reason but, it is the main one,” Jimin reminded his boyfriend, and himself.

Even though the words felt hollow in the air.

“I guess,” Jungkook said.

“You’ve got work early, we need to go back to bed,” Jimin said, motioning for Jungkook to get into bed as well. The two men cuddled up to each other, each feeling like something, or someone, was missing...

Faster than you thought possible, the ten week mark had come.

It was time to get your first ultrasound of the pregnancy.

The boys were over the moon about the whole thing. Excitedly chatting in the car.

“I hope we can see the baby well,” Jungkook said, driving carefully through the street.

Jimin hummed in agreement. “Me too, the baby is still super small right now. About the size of a prune but, we’ll still be able to see them on the screen. And, we can hear their heartbeat!”

You smiled at their excitement. Bringing your fingers up you brushed the pendant they gave you, a nervous habit you’d picked up shortly after their gifting it to you. Jungkook looked at you in the rearview, playing with the sparkling jewelry piece. It made his chest feel tight, looking at you. Jimin placed a hand on his, making Jungkook focus on him for a moment.

Jimin shook his head and Jungkook swallowed thickly, knowing exactly what he meant.

Soon, you were all at the clinic.

Jimin helped you out of the backseat, getting your bag and whatnot so you didn’t have to fuss with it. Jungkook placed a protective hand on your lower back, guiding you into the building.

You felt your heart flutter in your chest at the action, having to cover up your blushing with a cough. Jimin urged you to sit down while he got the paperwork, something you didn’t fight him on. You were exhausted as of late.

The boys reassured you it was normal to be tired. You knew, however, that you were a little more tired than normal. Briefly you wondered if it was because it was your first time and you’d never felt something like this. However, that didn’t sit right. You knew there was something going on, but you didn’t want to worry the boys. Especially since you were getting an ultrasound today.

Sitting next to Jungkook in the waiting room, he made small talk. Asking how you were feeling and if the morning sickness had gotten any better.

“It’s gotten worse,” you complained, leaning your head back in the seat.

“Really? Maybe we can ask the doctor to prescribe something for you,” he said.

“It should be going away soon, I’ll be alright,” you reassured, patting his knee.

“Sometimes it doesn’t go away until the baby is born, I just don’t want you to suffer if we can do something about it,” Jungkook said softly.

“If it gets too bad, I’ll say something. Okay?” You said, keeping a gentle smile on your face.

“Yeah, okay,” he agreed.

Jimin came back and took Jungkook’s hand, intertwining their fingers together. Jimin had a habit of tracing the tattoos on Jungkook’s hands when he was nervous, it made you smile.

Eventually a nurse called your name and led you back to the ultrasound room. Jungkook smiled and sat down in the chair provided. Jimin helped you up onto the table and the ultrasound tech went over what they would be looking for and opened it up for questions.

When no one had any, she proceeded.

“Okay, I just need you to pull the front of your pants down a little bit,” the tech asked, prepping the machine.

You immediately turned and looked at Jungkook and Jimin, then down at your stomach. It wasn’t a big deal, it was just a little bit anyways.

Without much more thought you pulled your pants so just the top of your panties were showing. Jungkook’s eyes widened at your actions, but he tried to keep a calm exterior. Jimin kept his eyes trained on the screen, not wanting you to feel uncomfortable.

The ultrasound gel was cold, making you jump when it came in contact with your skin. But soon it was warming to your skin and you all looked at the screen with rapt attention.

“Alright so we should see the head and curvature of the body, but other than that this is just to make sure that everything is looking good in the uterus and to see if there are any abnormalities with the baby-oh! Babies it appears,” the tech said, a big smile on her face.

“What?” Jimin said.

“There’s another head there, if you look right here,” she pointed at the screen. “Looks like you’ve got a set of twins in there!”

Jungkook’s eyes teared up, looking down at your stomach with his heart in his throat.

You were stunned.

Twins?

The first try?

Wow, you really did win the lottery.

“Oh my God,” Jimin said, hiding his face in Jungkook’s shoulder.

“Way to go, got those twins first try,” you said, trying to keep your nerves under control.

“It’s all thanks to you Y/N, we couldn’t do it without you,” Jungkook reminded.

“Are you guys going to want the pictures?” The tech asked. Jimin and Jungkook of course said yes.

“Wow, look at their heads babe!” Jimin yelped as you all walked out of the clinic together. Jimin was still cooing over the pictures of the twins from the ultrasound.

“I need to put it in my wallet,” he said, bringing out the accessory shortly after.

You smiled at their excitement. You were beyond happy, you’d done it. Gave them the twins they desperately wanted. First try too. You knew that meant a few more complications, but, you didn’t want that to hold too much weight over you.

“We should call Namjoon and Jin! Tell them the news about the twins!”

You nodded quickly, wanting to tell your friends the update.

Namjoon and Jin were thrilled, obviously. Insisting that they’ll give Annie to Jin’s parents for the night so you could all get together and have a meal. Agreeing, the boys set it up for around seven thirty.

“Dress nice! I also expect to see those ultrasound pictures!” Jin said through the phone.

You snorted and shook your head, gently touching your stomach. You felt a fluttering in your chest, like you were standing on the edge of a tall building or something. It made you gasp lightly, moving your hand away from your belly to your chest. Jimin seemed to notice your movement because he was turning around in his seat.

“Everything alright there?” He asked, looking at you with his beautiful brown eyes.

“Y-yeah, I’m good. We’re-good,” you said, pointing to your tummy. Jimin’s eyes lit up at the mention of the babies.

“Okay, tell me if you need anything,” he said, turning around and facing the front once more.

You all walked back into the apartment, Jungkook still gushing about everything. You simply smiled and went to go get ready for dinner.

Jin did say to look nice, so you picked out a few things from your shopping excursion a while back. Putting on a dress that looked skin tight but it was super stretchy, so no doubt you could wear it late into the pregnancy. The zipper on the back would be an issue but, it made you feel a little sexy. You hadn’t really done a lot in regards to your appearance around the boys, you didn’t see the need.

But, it wouldn’t hurt to do your hair and dress nicely...

You had the perfect shoes to pair with the dress. You grabbed some stockings and a few other small pieces of jewelry, placing them on the bed while you assembled everything together the way you wanted it.

Eventually, you were all set.

Except for the zipper on the back.

You didn’t understand why there was a zipper on such a stretchy dress, but fashion has its ways you guess. Reaching behind you proved unsuccessful. Quickly growing frustrated, you did the following without thinking.

“Jimin? Jungkook? Can one of you come here for a second please?”

Once the words were out, you immediately wished you could eat them.

But the damage had been done.

Both men walked in your room.

Jimin’s jaw dropped open, looking at you in awe.

You were in knee high stockings, low heels and a slinky black dress that hugged your body so perfectly it made him want to drop to his knees. Jungkook fared no better. Seeing your hair styled and a little bit of makeup on your features really enhanced your natural beauty. They both were staring, making you shrink in embarrassment.

“O-Okay, you can blink any time now,” you said, chuckling to ease the tension in the room.

“You look... wow,” Jimin breathed.

“Incredible. You look incredible,” Jungkook said, eyes trailing down your legs.

“Thank you, but, um... Could one of you please come zip me up? I can’t reach the zipper,” you said, turning your back to them fully.

Jungkook stared at his boyfriend with an almost agonized look on his face. Jimin nodded and walked forward, brushing your hair out of the way. Placing a gentle hand on your hip Jimin pulled the zipper up to the top, covering each inch of your beautiful skin.

Jungkook swallowed his noise of protest, trying to remember what Jimin had said. You weren’t an object for them to use, you were their surrogate. The woman who would be birthing their twins. And then leaving...

Jimin knew if Jungkook had walked forward to zip up your dress he wouldn’t be able to keep it together. Jimin wasn’t doing that hot either to be honest. Your hips flared out. Looking so beautiful hugged in the dress, and the warmth of your skin beneath his fingertips was... alarming.

“Thank you,” you said, turning around with a smile on your face.

Jimin couldn’t help but mirror your grin.

“Absolutely, are you ready to go now?” He asked, trying to keep from getting distracted any more.

“Yeah, let’s go! I want Jin to feed me so much I burst,” you said, heading towards the door. Once you were gone, Jungkook looked at Jimin.

“This is only getting harder,” Jungkook said, biting his lip.

“Are you going to be alright?” Jimin questioned, placing his hand on Jungkook’s shoulder.

“Yeah, just... This feels wrong,” Jungkook whispered.

“What feels wrong?” Jimin asked.

“Keeping her at arm's length, I just feel awkward. Pushing her away when she’s doing something so big for us, it’s really emotionally charged and... I feel like a jerk for treating her like just another person. Like she isn’t special,” Jungkook explained, brushing his hair out of his face.

“I understand,” Jimin said, trying to smooth the frown lines from Jungkook’s face.

“Boys? Are you coming?” Your voice echoed through the house.

“Coming!” Jimin said. “We’ll talk about this later, okay? We’ll figure this out.”

—

The dinner at Jin and Namjoon’s was beyond anything you’d expected.

There was so much food and honestly, you ate a lot. Lying back in your chair, tilting your head back you sighed. Rubbing your stomach unconsciously. But the boys noticed everything. Especially how amazing you looked in that outfit.

It was just about all they could do to keep their hands off of you. Jungkook was fidgeting the whole night, being the one who sat next to you. He really tried to keep his cool, but a man could only take so much.

“So, Y/N, how does it feel to be pregnant with twins?” Namjoon asked, taking a small bite of rice.

“Honestly? It’s not been a cake walk, let me tell you. My mood swings are everywhere, my chest is killing me, food is either a hit or miss and don’t get me started on how arou-ahem,” you froze at your brazen attitude. Jimin and Jungkook’s heads snapped at your statement, looking at you with masked emotions. “Sorry, got carried away. Anyways, it’s been wild. But, I’m really glad to be doing it, you know? The boys take good care of me,” you praised, smiling at the two of them now.

Namjoon noticed it first.

The twinkle in Jungkook’s eyes at your words. How genuinely happy he seemed listening to you talk. Jimin’s body language was always engaged with you, never closing off or making it appear like he wasn’t interested.

Namjoon’s eyes widened.

This would need to be discussed...

Soon, everyone was sitting in the living room, just digesting. When you got up and said you had to use the restroom.

When the men were alone, Namjoon attacked.

“What are you guys doing?” He asked, looking at the two younger men with worry in his features.

“What do you mean?” Jimin quizzed right back.

“Listen, I’ve been friends with Y/N for a long time. I really care about her and want only the best for her. I also want you guys to be happy and healthy and have your own family, so please don’t take what I’m about to say personally but-what the fuck?” He asked.

“What do you mean what the fuck?” Jungkook asked.

“Why are you looking at her like that?” Namjoon asked, feeling his frustration rise.

“Like what?!” Jimin argued.

“Like you-Like you, are all, like... a couple?” Namjoon said, feeling the awkward tension rising in the room.

“What?” Jungkook coughed.

“We aren’t together,” Jimin said slowly.

“But do you want to be?” Namjoon asked.

Jungkook broke first.

“I don’t know,” he whispered, placing his head in his hands. Jimin was quick to comfort the younger male, rubbing his back in big, soothing circles.

“It’s a new experience for us. We just want her to be happy and healthy and safe. You know, take care of her,” Jimin explained, skirting around the question.

“Of course, but, there’s a difference between appreciation and affection,” Jin said, speaking up.

“Y-Yeah, we know that,” Jimin answered. “I’m a therapist, I know what emotions are.”

Namjoon rolled his eyes.

“If you know what emotions are then why are you denying your own?” he asked.

“I’m not!”

“Bullshit,” Namjoon challenged.

“This is fucking ridiculous,” Jimin growled.

“What’s all the angry whispering out here for?” You asked, walking back into the room. The energy snapped within an instant.

“It’s alright, just a heated debate about politics,” Namjoon joked, giving you a tender smile.

“Oookay?” You said, coming back in to sit down next to Jungkook, who was trying his best to not squirm when your thigh brushed his.

The rest of the night moved rather calmly, but not without a fierce monopoly game that almost caused a few table flips. Jungkook wound up losing and threw a mini tantrum. But it was quickly smoothed over when you promised you’d bake him some cookies the next time he had a day off.

While Namjoon and Jin were cleaning up, Jungkook and Jimin discovered your sleeping frame on the couch once more. Breaths coming in even and slow, they smiled at you. Your lips were pouting lightly, something they’d discovered was a habit when you were sleeping.

And Jungkook adored it.

He came over to your side and tried to wake you up, but when you whined and fussed he decided it would just be easier to carry you to the car. Carefully, the strong young man lifted you into his arms and towards the door. Jimin got the rest of your things all together and they thanked Jin and Namjoon for the meal and night.

But before they left, Namjoon grabbed Jimin by the shoulder. Jungkook waited, looking back in worry. Jimin waved him on, saying he’d be there in a minute. Jungkook nodded before heading out the door.

“What?” Jimin asked.

“I’m sorry about earlier, I overstepped. I didn’t mean to offend you or Jungkook. It’s just, Y/N is very inexperienced when it comes to love and emotions and having that connection. I’m worried about what’s happening to her. I don’t want her to get her hopes up and be crushed later on,” he explained.

Jimin nodded his head.

“I accept your apology. I didn’t mean to fly off the handle either, Jungkook and I have been... Discussing it. But it’s not an easy thing to come to terms with, we aren’t sure what we feel for her... We know we care about her, but is it because she’s our surrogate and we want to care for her? Or is it something deeper? We don’t know,” Jimin sighed, running his fingers through his hair.

“Y/N is so special. She gives without thinking, she is so dedicated to those she cares about... she’d give the shirt off her back to someone she didn’t even know. It’s hard not to love her, but... she doesn’t deserve to be pulled in a million different directions either. But you all deserve to be happy, I’m always here if you need to talk,” Namjoon offered.

Jimin smiled lightly. “That’s normally my line.”

“You guys are good people, I wouldn’t have recommended Y/N do this if I didn’t trust you. But, just... please don’t take advantage of her heart. And don’t lie to yourselves either.”

Jimin nodded, looking down at the floor with a resolute nod.

“Thanks, both of you,” Jimin said, giving a small wave before heading out towards the car. Jungkook already had you buckled and settled in.

“What was that about?” Jungkook asked, getting into the front seat.

“He wanted to apologize for earlier, he felt like he overstepped. And, he wanted to explain why he was so defensive over Y/N,” Jimin said.

Jungkook nodded and started the car, taking off down the road.

“Why is he so protective? Did they like, date in the past or something?” Jungkook asked. Jimin shook his head.

“N-No, Y/N hasn’t ever had a boyfriend or girlfriend,” Jimin said, resting his head in his hand.

“What? Really?” Jungkook balked. Trying to think of how someone like you hadn’t ever been snatched up before. You were a total catch! But, you did tend to keep to yourself.

“Yeah, she told me about it the day she had her IUI done,” Jimin explained.

“Oh, so-wait. She’s having a baby when she’s never, like, had sex?” Jungkook said. “Is that safe?”

“I mean I’m sure it’s safe but, she’s not... Um, she told me she’s had sex before,” Jimin said.

“Wow, how did this all come up?” Jungkook asked.

“Well, she mentioned something about wanting someone who looked at her the way we look at each other,” Jimin blushed.

“She’s so cute,” Jungkook groaned. “Well, at least she’s been with someone before. You know, had that kind of pleasure.”

Jimin coughed, rubbing his neck. Jungkook looked at him weirdly.

“What?”

“She may have off-handedly mentioned that she’s never, uh... You know, finished,” Jimin flushed. Jungkook looked floored at the information.

“You mean to tell me, that some jerk took her virginity and didn’t fucking make it special? What a fucking tool bag,” Jungkook growled.

“I don’t know the story, she didn’t divulge that kind of information. I was the one who guessed she’s never finished, and she was pretty embarrassed about it all to be honest,” Jimin said.

“That is so frustrating,” Jungkook said.

“Yeah.”

The car was quiet, save for your soft little snores coming from the back seat.

“Did you hear what she said during dinner?” Jimin asked. “When she was talking about her pregnancy symptoms.”

“Yeah...” Jungkook trailed off.

“I wish we could do something for her, I feel so bad,” Jimin whispered.

“We can be there to support her but we can’t over step either,” Jungkook said.

“I know, normally I’m the one reminding you of that,” Jimin huffed.

“I understand it’s not easy for either of us,” Jungkook said softly.

“Maybe we just need a god romp in the sheets to get it out of our system hmm?” Jimin teased, running a hand up Jungkook’s thigh. Jungkook couldn’t help the hiss that came out of his mouth at the touch. They hadn’t really been active in that way since you’d come into the house.

“Y-You know how loud I get,” Jungkook said, swallowing hard.

“Oh I’m very aware how loud I can make you scream,” Jimin winked.

“Stop, I’m already hard,” Jungkook whined.

“I bet you are baby,” Jimin said, squeezing his boyfriend’s thigh tight.

“Stop, please,” Jungkook whined.

“Mmm,” Jimin said, not sensing that Jungkook really wanted him to stop. “And what if I keep going baby? What if I snuck my hand into your pants and tugged your pathetic little cock until you came huh? Make you come all over your expensive pants and make you lick it up?”

“Jimin,” Jungkook said, cock straining against his pants.

“Yes baby? What does my baby want, huh?” Jimin asked, so sweet... Almost dangerous.

“I-I want-”

“Mmm, are we home yet?” You voice perked up from the back seat.

“Y/N?” Jimin asked, turning to look at you. Your eyes were bleary from sleep and it was obvious you must’ve just woken up. Jungkook adjusted himself in the seat, trying to hide his throbbing erection from your sight.

“Yeah?” You said, blinking slow.

“Sweetie,” Jimin cooed, brushing a few strands of your hair back from your face, even though it was an awkward angle for him.

“Jungkook are you okay?” You asked, noticing how tense the young man’s posture was.

“I-I’m good,” he said, trying to hide his arousal.

“Okay,” you said, laying your head back down.

Jungkook pulled the car into the front slot of the building, handing the keys over to the valet. The two of them brought you out of the car and Jimin decided it was his turn to carry you up to the apartment. So, the three of you all made it to the apartment in silence.

You were awake, but you weren’t feeling too terribly chatty. Sleep still at the forefront of your mind. Jungkook and Jimin hadn’t spoken since you got out of the car, and you can’t help but feel like you were in the middle of something kinda intense. The charged feeling in the room making you shift against Jimin’s chest.

He looked down at you, trying to keep himself from jostling you too much. You were exhausted. But soon, you felt bile rising in your throat...

“Jimin put me down,” you said, holding your hand to the mouth. Just as he set you down you scrambled to the bathroom and threw up the massive dinner you’d eaten. Jimin and Jungkook were rushing right after you. Jungkook brought your hair away from your face. Jimin sat down next to him to rub your back.

You got to the point where you were just dry heaving into the toilet, but it didn’t seem to end.

“Oh fuck,” you croaked, coughing hard.

“You want some water?” Jimin asked.

“No, I’m scared I’ll just throw that up too,” you whined.

“It might be better than just dry heaving,” Jimin said.

“You got a point,” you huffed, trying to keep your head from spinning.

“I’ll get you some,” he said, moving off the floor to head towards the kitchen. Jungkook shuffled forward, kind of molding his front to your back. When you pushed a little too hard against him you felt it. Wondering what it could be for a moment you pushed back against him again, when he groaned in surprise.

“U-Um, Jungkook?” You squeaked.

“S-Sorry!” He said, moving away faster than the speed of light.

“I-It’s okay, just, you know,” you flushed.

“It’s not because of you! It’s not uh, I wasn’t um,” he stuttered.

“I-I didn’t think it was?” You said, more of a question.

“It’s not that you’re not pretty or anything it’s-”

“No, I get it,” you said, smiling weakly.

“Y/N-”

“Here’s your water,” Jimin said, bringing in a glass for you to drink.

You sipped it slowly. Not paying attention. Jungkook looked like he was going to die in the corner, which made Jimin shoot him a weird look. He just shook his head as he covered his face. Jimin made a mental note to question him about it later, but his concern was on you right now.

“Have you been getting sick a lot?” Jimin asked, placing a soft hand on your shoulder.

“I mean, it’s mainly in the morning. I think I just ate too much at dinner,” you said, pouting lightly.

“Gotcha, do you feel like you’re going to get sick again? Or do you think you’re done?” He asked.

“I-I think I’m good,” you said, putting the empty glass down.

“Are you sure?” Jimin asked, making you look at him.

“Mhmm,” you confirmed, eyes getting droopy again.

“Alright sleepyhead, brush your teeth and go to bed. Need help getting up?” Jimin worried, fussing over you like any father to be would.

You stood up slowly, mindful of your dizzy head. But, when you stood at the sink you felt everything kinda snap into focus. Jimin dragged Jungkook out of the bathroom to let you do your thing, but told you to come get them if you needed anything.

Hurrying into the bedroom, Jimin narrowed his eyes at his boyfriend.

“Why did you look like you’d rather crawl into an overflowing storm drain than be in that bathroom? What happened when I was getting water?”

Jungkook looked up at Jimin could see the embarrassment on his face. Sighing, Jimin sat down, placing his hand on his boyfriend’s back.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have teased you in the car. It’s just, been a while you know? I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable or anything,” Jimin apologized.

“Y/N felt it, my... When you moved me so you could get out of the bathroom to get her the water, she was pushed up against me. And, she pushed back against me and felt my dick against her,” Jungkook said, rubbing her face.

“Oh, that is... uh, awkward,” Jimin agreed.

“It gets worse,” Jungkook said.

“What do you mean?” Jimin asked.

“I-I told her it wasn’t because of her and then I tried to tell her it’s not that she wasn’t pretty and I just threw up a bunch of words that didn’t make sense and then you were back,” Jungkook whimpered.

Jimin sighed. Jungkook had never been a genius with words, but normally he was better than that. He knows that Jungkook is mortified, Jungkook wasn’t good at mingling or recovering from blunders of the social variety. So, Jimin just sighed and gave his boyfriend a gentle kiss.

“It’s okay Jungkook, Y/N isn’t gonna hold this against you,” Jimin soothed.

“I just feel terrible,” Jungkook said softly.

“Why? It was an accident,” Jimin reasoned.

“Because I-I didn’t want her to stop,” he swallowed. Jimin bit his lip and tried to keep his anger from spilling over.

“I don’t know how many times we have to talk about this Jungkook,” Jimin said.

“We were talking about it in the car! But we’ve never talked about what we want, what we’re doing now, it's not sustainable. I’m going crazy!” Jungkook yelled.

“Jungkook keep your voice down!” Jimin reminded.

“Jimin I’m so fucking confused, I don’t know what we’re doing. What I’m doing. I-I do know one thing for certain. I love those kids, so much, and they aren’t even here yet. I love them so much, because they’re ours... But... I can’t keep doing this. Getting closer only to rip myself away, it’s killing me Jimin. If you want me to walk away, I will but, I just can’t keep giving myself hope when there isn’t any,” Jungkook cried, tears falling down his cheeks.

“I-I didn’t know you were so broken up over this,” Jimin whispered.

“I’m so confused,” Jungkook whispered.

“I am too, I love you so much but... I feel this connection to her. I know it’s normal to be grateful, but, I know it’s more than that with her,” Jimin said, moving to give Jungkook a back hug.

“Then we need to make a decision,” Jungkook said.

“You want to pursue her as a part of our couple? Like, make her our girlfriend?” Jimin asked.

“Do you?” Jungkook asked back.

“I mean... I wouldn’t be opposed,” Jimin said softly.

“I don’t want this if you don’t,” Jungkook said, turning to look at Jimin with sparkling eyes.

“I want this... I want her, but, we need to give her some time, as well as ourselves to come to terms with this,” Jimin reasoned.

“Okay,” Jungkook agreed.

“But, when we’re both ready, we can approach her,” Jimin said.

“Would this be healthy to do? I mean, mentally,” Jungkook asked.

“Polygamous couples generally tend to have better communication than the average two person couples. And with one of us being a therapist I think we could manage. I-I want to work towards that,” Jimin confessed.

“I want this too,” Jungkook said excitedly.

“Then that’s what we’ll do...”

You laid in bed late into the night. You heard Jungkook and Jimin having a disagreement. You couldn’t make out the words but, the walls were thin... You prayed to God that it wasn’t about you, or anything related to the children.

Slowly, your hand trailed down to your stomach. You didn’t think you could see a bump yet, but maybe a little something? You weren’t sure, maybe it was just wishful thinking.

You moved slightly, and you felt something in your underwear. Adjusting lightly, you pulled them down to look, and you saw a decent amount of arousal soaking into the cotton fabric. Blushing bright red you reached down to touch your hot center, to find that you were, in fact, dripping wet.

Biting your lip you thought back on the bathroom incident. Jungkook’s firm body pressed against yours, his hardened cock pressed against your ass, the hot groan he let out. Running your fingers over your slit, you gathered your slick and pushed against your clit gently.

Shockwaves of pleasure ripped through you at the sensation.

“Oh!” You gasped, hand coming up to cover your mouth in fear of waking the boys.

You did it again, causing your body to jump slightly, making more of your arousal drip from your center. Licking your lips you thought about what Jungkook’s hands would feel like instead of yours. What his body would feel like pressed up against yours naked... Jimin’s plump lips flashed through your mind for a second, making you wonder what his blond head would look like between-

No!

No no no no no!

Ripping your hand away from your weeping core you turned over and placed your hands on your head.

How could you? Those two weren’t something to fuel your lonely fantasies! They are in love with each other, and are going to have a family... Albeit you had to help with that part but, still. Jimin and Jungkook weren’t yours... They were each other’s...

But as much as you tried to tell yourself that it would never happen...

You couldn’t help but dream of the two men’s hands running over your body...

Hot breaths touching your ears...

Taglist: @kittkat44, @giadalin, @kookachuwu

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lunaekalenda · 4 years ago

Text

daddy.

a/n: okay so this is my try to write something more spicy i guess :D i accept criticisms since i'm not really into this and i was just curious to write it :') sorry for your eyes my dears also big thankies to @prada-issues for reading it and give her opinion aaaa please minors do not interact with this post ! to be honest it is based on s4 kirstein what a surprise

your favorite character x fem!reader (warnings and one shot down the read more)

w: use of words like daddy, baby, good girl or bad girl; fingering, voyeurism, exhibitionism, mention of adult videos, male m, oral (male receiving), thigh riding, unprotected sex, slapping

You don't like this tone of pink. Or even this laces. But, after all, he bought this for you. Thinking about you. What other way could you please him more than showing him how good it looked on you?

"Turn around." that were the only words said. He's sitting on his little couch, a glass full of liquor on his right hand. His hair is messy, as if he has run his fingers through it. His elbows are on his knees, his body slightly leaning to the front to have a better view. You turn around. "Slowly, princess, slowly." he asks again. Your feet obey before your brain. Actually, you don't dislike this. Being desired with this intensity. He stretches an arm towards you, taking the little pink skirt he bought, pulling softly to make you go closer to him. Then, his attractiveness shots.

He leans back again, a lazy hand unbuttoning his shirt's neck, long and bony fingers entering the fabric to take the button off. You can smell his liquor and see a couple sweat pearls running down his body, disappearing on his clavicle, still covered by the white shirt. He looks at you in the eyes, a dangerous smile appearing on his lips.

"Are you seeing somehing, baby?" he asks, his hands being even more provocative, how his fingers open a way to the inner part of his clothes to take the little plastic out. His tongue caresses his lips when he takes the last sip. He gets up. "I told you to turn around, but you stood still, looking at me. That isn't what I asked you to do, hm?" he says. You can feel his hands playing on your sides, reaching the skirt. "I guess you need a little punishment." he whispers. You find his eyes, lust and desire reflected on them. You don't want to be punished. You want his praises.

"But I like when you call me good g-" you get interrupted by his deep and lustful laugh.

"Good girls do what Daddy ask them to do, hm? They aren't disobeying girls. So..." he says. His hands sneak into your skirt, finding easily your panties. Just with a little touch, he smiles. "... I guess being a bad girl for me isn't that bad, since you keep disobeying me." he says.

When he asked you to start this type of relationship, you didn't know how turned on you could get just by hearing him call you 'Good Girl'. The dominance aura he has around, the way this fits him as if it was made for him. It makes your legs weak and your pretty cunt squelch around nothing.

He gives a little slap on your butt, still covered with that cute pastel pink skirt. He goes back to his couch, sitting. The way his hand unzip his pants, so lazy and unamused about the situation... You take a fast look to his legs. An important bulge is growing on his underwear. "Kneel here for me, hm?" he asks, showing a place between his legs. You kneel, on the cushion he put for you. He always thinks of those little details. He doesn't want to hurt his loved one.

His hand takes out that pretty cock he has. You lean towards it, but his hand stops you. "No, baby. This is a punishment. You're gonna kneel there and watch how Daddy gets off, okay?" He also takes his phone from his pocket, quickly tipping. You look curious at the back of the phone. Is he chatting?

No.

You recognize what he's watching a second before the first sound. Moans and skin slaps coming from his phone. His hand moves as lazy as all his previous movements, his mouth half open, letting some gasps and sighs escape through his teeth. You always loved his hands and, honestly, they look so good around his shift, giving it slow strokes. You also want to help him, but you find this scene so hot...

While your fingers find the end of the skirt, his eyes look at you from above the screen.

"Don't touch yourself, hm? Daddy din't give you permission to" he says. His voice has a raspy tone that makes your interior tingle and he lets the words out in a whisper, as if he was adverting you. He is adverting you. You don't want more punishments. You want to be his good girl again, the one that gets his praises and caresses and kisses. Your hand fastly goes up again, now resting on his knees. He smiles. "That's it." his sentence is followed by a deep moan he lets out, his hand going a little faster while his phone gets all his attention again. You don't like that. You're supposed to be what makes him hard, not that stupid video. He should be getting off with you. It looks so hot, all hard and gloomy. You don't want more punishments, but Daddy won't be angry if you help him a little, right?

You lean closer to him, his eyes covered by the screen when your tongue gives a little kitten lick to his dick. He lets out a groan. Taking his phone out of his vision, he looks at you.

"I thought you maybe needed some help, Daddy." the way that word leaves your mouth, so smoothly and innocent, turns him a hundred times more. He puts his phone near the glass, on the little crystal table near the couch. His hand leaves his dick, now guiding your head.

"Daddy is dissappointed since you disobeyed me again." he says. He makes the shape of your lips with his thumb, feeling the gloss cape on them.

"But I just wanted to help you." you pout. He takes your jaw quietly. His eyes looking directly at yours. His lips curve on a sweet smile.

"Hm, and you're a really good girl for that. Now, open your mouth and help Daddy, yeah? That's what you wanted to do." his words are a win for you. You get closer, his hand quietly guiding you. "That's right, just like that." his head tilted back and his hand rests on your hair, guiding your movements softly. Your tongue spins around his tip, making him gasp louder, his hips starting an unconscious movement against your mouth, not really hard. "Hm, you're making Daddy feel really good... As the god girl you are." You can help but smile, even with your mouth full. He caresses your cheek. "Come on, baby. I taught you how to make Daddy happy with that cute mouth of yours." You know it. He has taught you how he likes to be sucked, from tongue movements to pace changings. A little bulge appears on your cheek. He caresses it, his tip feeling his thumb outside of your mouth. He takes your head with both hands, softly thrusting into you. You can't help but let him use it. He isn't rude, he knows you only want to help him. He just lets his hips make lazy movements against your mouth. He makes you release it, some spit connecting both of you. He spreads it out of your mouth with his thumb.

"You look so pretty, baby..." he doesn't lie. Your blushed cheeks, teary eyes and plumped lips make you look really beautiful. And knowing that him is the reason makes his cock twitch.

Now you're sitting on his thigh, little movements accompanied by moans while you ride on top of his pants, leaving a little wet patch on them.

"Oh, you're that wet? You even passed from your pantie to my pant." he says. His hand is stroking his shift again, his eyes changing from your pleasure expression to your little hip movement. He groans. "So fucking beautiful." He sneaks his free hand between your underwear and your skin, one king and bony finger reaching your inner. You let out a moan.

"Mmh, it feels good..." you say, moving with more need, wanting to feel his finger deeper. He smiles for you, so attractive.

"Yeah? This feels good?" he asks. He puts a second finger inside. "Than think about how well my cock will feel." he says. You moan louder, feeling his hand stroking again while his fingers play inside you. He takes them both out, a hilo de fluids connecting them to you. "Now, ride Daddy." he says. You look at the wonderful sights you have. His sweating body, only his pants and boxers on, with his cock outside them, hard and ready for you. You stand up and, before getting your price, you wait for him to decide with clothes you should leave on your body. "Take off your panties." he says. You do so, anticipating in your stomach all the pleasure you're gonna feel when he gets buried into you. "Leave the skirt, take off the shirt." he asks. You do so, his lips smiling when he founds you don't use a bra, just how he told you to. "So obedient..." he whispers, attracting you to his lap and sitting you. That way, with his hands moving your hips, you can rub your now naked body against his. A deep moan escapes his mouth. You sigh with satisfaction.

"Can I put it in, Daddy?" the way you beg, the way you call him Daddy makes him want to let you do whatever you want with him. He gets so hard and so weak he could cum just hearing you calling him "Daddy" and moving those cute lashes. He nods, his hands guiding your hips up while you grind down on him slowly. You both let out a moan, your mouth open with pleasure. He puts a finger inside, and you suck it. You suck his finger how he taught you. A groan escapes his throath.

"You're so big, oh, godess." you say. He smiles, an smile full of lust, his hands tangling with yours when you start a slow movement against him.

"You're taking it so well, baby..." he says. "You like to feel Daddy's cock inside you, hm?" His hips go up involuntary, thrusts helping your pace. "You're so tight for me..." that made you squeeze him even more. His head went back, showing you his Adam apple and his neck, exhaling slowly. "Like that."

His hands are on both sides of your hips, some casual slaps whenever he wants you to be faster. Your legs hurt because of the impulse but you don't care. It feels so good. He knows it. That's why he takes you, turning you both around, his arms holding your legs while he accommodates your body on the couch, making easier for him to thrust into you. His hips make lascive noises when they hit you, your hands reaching his neck. You need to hold onto something. You feel dizzy from the pleasure.

"More." you beg. Your voice sounds broke, pure desire on it. He knows you're close, really close, that's why his thrusts take a slower pace, hitting the spots he knows you like, making your eyes roll. "More, more." it sound like an oration now, his body finding yours so slowly you think you're burning in slow burn. You can also hear his gasps, his groans, how he's also enjoying soemthing than only you can bring him.

"You're close, aren't you, baby?" he asks. His voice sounds so sexy like that. You're about to cry, you're feeling so well. Your legs start to tremble and your grip on his hair is stronger. His mouth covers yours on a sweet kiss, his tongue finding yours. He parts under your surprise gaze. "I want to hear every single sound you make when you come." he says. And you give it to him, so gladly.

A reward for making you feel that good.

little tag: @espritmuse <3

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aion-rsa · 4 years ago

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Riverdale Season 5 Episode 2 Review – Chapter 78: The Preppy Murders

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This RIVERDALE review contains spoilers.

Riverdale Season 5 Episode 2

“So now we have a preppy murderer on the loose…”

The most valid criticism about Riverdale over the course of its now five seasons is how the series constantly drags out its ongoing mysteries, only to frantically race to wrap them up. Due to the pandemic, what was initially intended as last season’s big resolution episode just played out before our eyes and it was….kind of meh?

Let’s examine the wrapping up of these various plots from most to least successful, shall we?

As I speculated in last week’s wrap-up, Jellybean was revealed to be the Auteur (with an assist from her friends). This is actually oddly sweet, as the Jughead/Jellybean relationship hasn’t been heavily explored in this show. There is much dramatic mileage to be mined from the fact that these siblings have been separated for most of their lives and when they are finally reunited it is against the backdrop of everything from murderous games of Dungeons and Dragons knock offs to my personal favorite, the town’s Maple Syrup Blood Feud. Sure, the argument can be made here that Jellybean’s lack of realization of how hurtful these demented videos are is straight up psychotic — she definitely seems to be more on the road to becoming a serial killer here than Betty. Yet there is a pure motive behind them, that of a sister who wants to keep her cool brother around that is actually touching.

That said, there are contrivances aplenty to be had with this denouement. Primarily, why would she recreate Archie’s confrontation with the Black Hood? Correct me if I’m wrong, but there wasn’t actually security footage of this incident, therefore Jellybean and her friends couldn’t have staged such a dramatic recreation. Plus, Veronica works at the Chok’lit Shoppe non-stop, so surely she and/or Pop Tate would have mentioned to Archie that a bunch of kids were recreating his worst trauma. With Riverdale, a deluxe cheesburger-sized suspension of disbelief is the order of the day. But this is pushing it.

The second most interesting storyline that played out here unsurprisingly involves Cheryl. From her horror that the graduation uniforms aren’t crimson to her touching scenes with Toni, the character continues to explode energy whenever she appears. There is something hilarious about her utter indifference to her mother poisoning most of her family that makes her all the more endearing. It’s going to be fascinating to watch her attempt to redeem the Blossom family name. But if anyone can do it, Cheryl can.

Next up comes the not-shocking-at-all reveal that Charles is not the stand-up guy we are supposed to think he was. Remember, this was teased early in the fourth season when we saw him lovey dovey with Chic during a prison visit. Since then it’s been a lot of wheel-spinning and I have to admit that I was surprised that he was actually an FBI agent at all given how much subterfuge is always going on within the Riverdale town limits.

This episode introduced the subplot that Jughead’s former Stonewall Prep classmates were being murdered, raising the gigantic question of who cares? Charles believes his motives behind the killings are born of nobility. Narratively speaking, he’s not much of a serial killer though. In fact, Hermosa cold-bloodedly executes more people than he did in this very episode.

It’s another example of Riverdale trying to stick the landing but instead coming down on its knees. If the preppy murders were happening for weeks, somehow piggybacking off of the mayhem the Auteur was creating this all would have been much more effective.

Circling back to Hermosa for a second. Mishel Prada continues to deliver a delightfully cold performance as Veronica’s sister, here tonight helping to mastermind yet another takedown of Hiram Lodge. Maybe this one will stick, as the final episode of Katy Keene showed a future version of Hiram who has taken up residence in New York City, seemingly focused on smaller scale intimidation that his usual Riverdale antics. At this point the pendulum has swung so far back and forth on the character that it’s hard to feel any concern about him either way. With any luck we will see a new iteration of the character following the series’ impending time jump. Otherwise it’s just business as usual for Hiram, and that is beyond stale.

All of this brings us to Archie. Typically this poor kid’s storyline is the least interesting of the lot. It’s a nice touch to show how Fred’s death is at the core of his ongoing ennui, and K.J. Apa is at his best when he shows Archie spiraling. Yet there was never a doubt that Archie wouldn’t write the letter asking the judge for leniency towards the kid who caused Fred’s death. At his heart, Archie is a good kid, and he would have down the right thing without having to involve the problematic Uncle Frank.

Next week: Graduation time, and a glimpse at Riverdale’s future.

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Riverdale Rundown

• Mary offers Archie some “camo-mile” tea. Whether or not this pronunciation is an actor’s choice or yet another of Riverdale‘s goofy fake productions remains a mystery that even Betty and Jughead couldn’t solve.

• Kevin and Reggie do not appear in this episode. And that is not okay.

• Farewell weirdo Blossoms, we hardly knew — and definitely didn’t care about — ye.

• Hermione announces her plans to divorce Hiram and, hilariously, become a cast member on The Real Housewives of New York City in this episode. This development was originally written when Marisol Nichols was planning on leaving Riverdale, however she will in fact be back after the upcoming (and heavily publicized so its not exactly a spoiler) time jump.

• I straight up Haw Haw-ed at Charles’ economy brand adoption of Dexter‘s serial killing ethos.

• I know there just wasn’t time to show Alice’s reaction to finding out about Charles due to everything else that was happening in this episode, but I would have much rather seen that subplot play out on screen instead of more Archie angst.

• Dramatically it would have been really involving to have Archie confront Jellybean about how utterly fucked up her actions towards him were. Furthermore, her accomplices were kids Archie helped at his community center. There is some real narrative meat to be chewed on there, and hopefully we will see this mentioned in next week’s episode.

• Real talk though, Jellybean and her friends should definitely pursue Hollywood careers. Their skills are legitimate.

• “Are you kidding me Betty, what isn’t wrong?” It’s always so jarring when Archie shows some self-awareness, isn’t it?

• Next week’s episode apparently will focus on the gang’s final days at Riverdale High. Even though school is a massive part of Archie comics, it always feels super weird when the series focuses on it given how heightened the Riverdale reality is.

The post Riverdale Season 5 Episode 2 Review – Chapter 78: The Preppy Murders appeared first on Den of Geek.

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bd-steelyfam · 6 years ago

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We've all heard of standswap. But what about standswap-dadswap?

//So the dads and the SS!dads switch places, huh? This is such an interesting scenario! Will they get along with each other? Will everything go haywire? Will sadness happen?

//I was only able to fit the stoplight trio here because I don't have time to properly make up characters for Emperor, Osiris, and Bastet. I also used their stand names for the unnamed standswap characters for a placeholder.

Steely Dan <=> Deacon Blues

Deacon and Terunosuke will get along very well because they relate to each other (both of them had pretty fucked up backstories and have to hide their real, more mature personality behind a childish attitude).

And the same could be said for Illuso. Both of them spent most of their childhood being lonely because of their stand powers.

When Illuso talks about his teammates (he calls them best friends to avoid suspicion), Deacon remembers his old friends back in his SDC days. He probably sees himself in Illuso and feels a little melancholic.

Deacon and Gwess can get along too, as they have to fake a smile and carefree personality to make everyone else not worry about them.

Unlike Dan who is pretty sarcastic and sassy, Deacon speaks more honestly, as he despises people who aren't direct and honest about their words.

Alright. Enough of the sad shit. Deacon and Terunosuke occasionally read books together and tell each other about their specific interest in comics (the former is into American hero comic books, and the latter is into mangas and light novels).

Deacon would probably at some point tell them about his adventure from 1989. Then Illuso sighs and comments, "Darn. Just like Padre."

He likes to show them his proud machinery and inventions to the three, which of course amuse them because of how absurd they work.

"What does this thing do?"

"Oh! This bad baby right here lets you read while you sleep, write while you sleep, and eat while you sleep!"

"Huh"

Deacon and Terunosuke are the ultimate short depressing smartass solidarity.

Meanwhile Dan and Deacon's kids? Eh... could maybe count.

His personality made him hard to get along with them, especially Velare. At first, he can hardly relate to them (his backstory is plain and nothing really gutwrenching happened to him, unlike theirs and their father's).

But then, after some time, they start to warm up to him. Behind his catty attitude, he is actually a pretty nice and caring person (even though it isn't really that obvious because of the way he generally acts).

Velare is going to get along with Dan first, because he is a pretty patient person and can handle his new dad's (?) unfamiliar attitude.

Tojiko is probably be slightly annoyed by how sassy and snarky Dan is. Dan would just comment on his chuuni behavior just to annoy him even further.

Since Dan is pretty good with cooking, Prada would sometimes watch him do the kitchen work (even though she's just more mesmerized by the way the stove fire dances around the pan). He would try teaching her how to make simple dishes, even though it's reduced to a pile of ash by the end of the day.

Of course, Dan cooks godlike food. Which somehow reminds them of their father's....

Rubber Soul <=> Yellow Temperance

Unlike the loud and obnoxious Rubber Soul, Yellow Temperance is generally a well-mannered and elegant man. This makes the three kids a little taken aback because they're not used to the quieter and nicer version of their dad.

Since Yellow is skilled in singing (and acting) and Akira is good at playing his electric guitar, they both spend a lot of time together! Akira would sometimes show Yellow how to use his guitar, and in return he teaches him how to sing properly.

Like Dan, everytime Hazamada becomes annoyed and acts like an ass to him, Yellow would do things like making sassy remarks to annoy him even further.

One time Anne asks Yellow about himself, and then he tells her about his bizarre adventure from Singapore. She replies, with a monotone voice, "Wow. I've been there with my father, ya know."

"Wait, really kid?"

"Yeah. Was kinda wild."

Yellow can cook pretty well, unlike Rubber who is absolutely not allowed to touch anything in the kitchen.

Because Yellow "disappeared" for twelve years, his kids are more than happy to see him back again. There were tears and laughter too. Even Surface is crying.

.....except the "him" is Rubber Soul, a greasier and more irritating version of their father. He has no choice but to tag along and act like him.

The stoic and serious Surface doesn't like Rubber Soul at first. His annoying way of talking hurts his ears, but because he's "their father" he just ignored it.

Like father, like son is the best sentence to convey Red and Rubber soul. They both are loud and act all cocky, which makes Surface's life a living hell.

SS!Anne is no different either. She is used to Yellow's calmer and more composed personality, which makes her a little suspicious. Whenever Rubber did or say something stupid, she would just shake her head and say, "Wow. Dad's job must've been weighing on him pretty hard, huh?"

Either way, the kids are very relieved to see their "father" back home safely without a scratch. If only it would last forever...

Devo the Cursed <=> Ebony Devil

From the surface, Devo and Ebony share similar traits. From their ungodly amount of scars to long hair, both of them look the same. Their personality isn't that different either.

...which surprised Vittorio at first.

Because Ebony was separated from his son years ago, he saw this as his chance to be a better father. He'll spend as much time as he can with him, as Vittorio and his long-lost kid looks the same to him.

Related, Ebony has poor eyesight and probably thought that Vittorio is his kid because of their resemblance.

Ebony, half-crying and started to take off his tough guy shield: "My son.... I am sorry for causing trouble for both your mother and you..... I promise to become a better father from now on."

Vittorio, eating an entire can of spray cheese: "What"

You know that clip of a wrestler that broke a claw machine's glass and gives all of it's toys to a crying kid? That's him.

Being dead in 1988 makes Ebony not familiar with things like video games, so Vittorio is more than delighted to show him things in his game and take him for a small walk around his hometown.

"What is this small screen that you can open and close like a book?"

"Dad that's a computer. Do you hit your head on the kitchen counter again?"

"Computer? But the last time I saw them, they look bigger and wider than this."

"Hold on a second"

The boy sometimes tell Ebony about his team (which he refers to as friends), and Ebony is somehow reminded of his old friends.

"There's this really cute girl that I like, but she's sickly and I'm afraid if I somehow hurt her unintentionally"

"Can relate."

They watch soccer games, eat outside, and Vittorio introduces Ebony to more things. Just classic father and son bonding time.

Unfortunately for Dolly, he never had the chance to properly memorize his father's looks and true nature. His mother just said that Ebony is a horrible and cruel murderer, which makes his first meeting with Devo not so wonderful.

Not seeing his father since he was two, Dolly just thought that Devo is actually his father and acts grouchy and all angry at him.

"I despise you. Mom told me that you were a very evil and violent man. You must've done something very bad for mom to have left you-"

"Vittorio I swear to FUCKING GOD IF THIS IS ABOUT THAT TIME I REFUSED TO BUY YOU A HAPPY KIDS MEAL I'M GOING TO CUT OFF THOSE UGLY BANGS OF YOURS."

Then Devo realizes he wasn't talking to Vittorio. Which pisses Dolly even more because he thinks his own father forgot his name.

"Vittorio? VITTORIO??!! OH, DID YOU GOT HOOKED UP WITH ANOTHER WOMAN AND THOUGHT THAT YOUR BASTARD KID'S NAME IS FATHER FUCKING VITTORIO??!! I'M DOLLY DAGGER!!"

"DID YOU CHANGE YOUR NAME INTO YOUR SHITTY MMO'S USERNAME LIKE YOU SAID LAST TIME??!!"

Then of course, they get along really slowly. Everytime Devo wanted to ask Dolly about what just happened, Dolly curtly replies, "I don't know!"

He then gives up just takes Dolly outside and spend some time together with him to make the kid satisfied.

Devo just rolls with whatever this kid wants.

And then Dolly becomes more softer acting around "his father", because he himself wanted to spend some time together with him after a long time.

"Sorry for yelling at you, dad."

".....whatever you say."

By the end of the day, Dolly feels content about "his father" being back in his life. Even though he doesn't show it directly, he just wishes that he won't be gone like last time...

//So now. Who do you think deserves the best father of the year award?

#sorry if I missed some points #this took two days to write because of how exhausted i am because of this vacation #jjba #standswap #haji.doc #askies #anon

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lauraramargosian · 6 years ago

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Celebrities when they were younger, how their past photos inspire.

Yes, this is Calvin Harris!

Isn’t it true that sometimes we look at celebrities as though they have always been “glamorous,” [yes, “Fergalicious” did help me remember how to spell that, I love that song]…

The entertainment industry shows the beauty, the glistening, the star-studded hotties wearing the biggest name brands like Prada, Calvin Klein, Versace or House of Drew.

In fact, that’s the goal, Hollywood talent tend to maintain the image they hope to inspire others with, luckily, it doesn’t take away from being human and that includes making mistakes.

These photos are some of your favorite celebrities when they were younger. Ryan Seacrest, for example, truly had my jaw hit the floor.

It’s nice to be like, “man, we would have been friends in middle school and high school.”

Further, we all had those “awkward phases,” growing up and many can relate.

The truth is, the majority of your favorite celebrities were bullied, they felt hopeless too at times.

Strength, that’s the word that brought them to where they are at this moment.

Youth is a process of growing and learning. Music videos, songs, lyrics, acting, it all comes with a past that influenced it, that’s why they say “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”

It’s safe to say that many people want to leave the world better than you found it, Mac Miller, [and my heart still hurts] for example, was constantly worried about the legacy he would leave behind…

But that worry, was all for nothing because he left behind art, a story, a struggle and one that constantly inspires people to make better choices.

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Trials can make our emotions rise but they also help you in a positive way.

“When you feel sad, it’s okay. It’s not the end of the world. Everyone has those days when you doubt yourself, and when you feel like everything you do sucks, but then there’s those days when you feel like Superman. It’s just the balance of the world. I just write to feel better.”

-Malcolm James McCormick

Honestly, it’s one of the best quotes Positive Celebrity has remembered from watching Mac Miller’s past interviews.

It’s a quote that really hit emotions due to the fact that we have all said: “everything sucks right now.”

When you look through photos of celebrities when they were younger, it’s almost as though you connect on another level.

To be specific, maybe you looked completely different when you were younger.

Unfortunately, sometimes kids can be mean and maybe you were bullied.

Taking a look at celebrities when they were younger gives you a little perspective into who they were before Hollywood shined its lights on them and allowed them to follow their dreams.

Not only their dreams in music or acting… But being able to further help charity, or bullied LGBTQ youth.

Pride 2019: Daya was not afraid to open up about her sexuality!

The list goes on and on, so when you look at a picture, think of it the way Susan Sontag explains in her quote.

“All photographs are memento mori. To take a photograph is to participate in another person’s (or thing’s) mortality, vulnerability, mutability. Precisely by slicing out this moment and freezing it, all photographs testify to time’s relentless melt.”

― Susan Sontag

“A picture is worth a thousand words,” refers to any complex idea and how it conveys meaning, purpose, and essence more effectively than a description does.

With this in mind, maybe looking at where our favorite celebrities started is what we need for that extra kick in the butt to never doubt or settle for less than you deserve.

To end, we want to invite you to take a look at your favorite celebrities when they were younger. Most importantly, remember who they are now as well, you’ll see more than growth, it’s like looking into their soul.

Except, it’s yearbook photos and stuff, haha!

Blessed be and enjoy!

Beyonce

Britney Spears

Calvin Harris

Clint Eastwood

David Guetta

EMINEM

Jennifer Aniston

Justin Bieber

Kim Kardashian

Krewella

Lady Gaga

Leonardo DiCaprio

Mac Miller

Madonna

Martin Garrix

Matt LeBlanc

Ryan Seacrest

Selena Gomez

Shia LeBeouf

Skrillex

Taylor Lautnor

Taylor Swift

Zac Efron

Zedd

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Positive Celebrity Gossip - Laurara Monique

Laurara Monique is known by various celebrities as the youngest and kindest celebrity blogger. PCG has been described as a "celebrity safe zone."

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Lmfao, this had me shoot coffee out of my nose. LOL. Kids really do say these things sometimes. bhahahaha.

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Positive Celebrity Gossip - Laurara Monique

Celebrities when they were younger, how their past photos inspire.

Celebrities when they were younger, how their past photos inspire. Check it out right here on positive celebrity gossip and entertainment news!

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Positive Celebrity Gossip - Laurara Monique was live.

Just having a laid back day.

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Fortnite fun, right, right? Maybe, and gamer rage. Lol.

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Just having a laid back day.

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Positive Celebrity Gossip - Laurara Monique

Animals don't have a voice but you do!

This Humane Society was named as 4-star charity for fiscal responsibility!

This Humane Society was named as 4-star charity for fiscal responsibility! Check it out right here on positive celebrity gossip, charity news as well as all entertainment news!

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Positive Celebrity Gossip - Laurara Monique

“I dreamt of being a famous singer or an actor who, through my work, could inspire others to be themselves or hang in there. I had no idea how I dreamt so big when I felt so small, but I know it got me through each day. I wanted to be the person I couldn’t find in my life.” - Ruby Rose

Ruby Rose: ‘Dreamt Big’ when she felt ‘so small.’

Ruby Rose: ‘Dreamt Big’ when she felt ‘so small.’ “I dreamt of being a famous singer or an actor who, through my work, could inspire others to be themselves or hang in there…

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Ariana Grande, Justin Bieber, Miley Cyrus & more to attend Manchester tribute concert!

Ariana Grande: Watch ‘One Love Manchester’ benefit concert LIVE!

Behind the scenes at the Manchester benefit concert.

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#Positive celebrity gossip #celebrity gossip #news #love #positive vibes

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dippedanddripped · 5 years ago

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Charli D’Amelio, the 16-year-old dancing queen of TikTok, is deep in thought. From the scrunched-up look on her face, an endearing expression familiar to her 70 million followers on the video-sharing app, a casual observer might be forgiven for thinking that she is flummoxed by one of life’s imponderables, and not which of her parents is the better dancer.

“That’s a really hard question,” she replies, after some deliberation. “My mom grew up a competition dancer and sometimes does TikTok dances with me, but my dad did breakdancing, and that’s raw, so if I had to ask someone to break it down in the middle of a party, I would have to say my dad.”

“They’re both really good dancers,” Dixie, Charli’s 18-year-old sister and fellow TikTok sensation, offers diplomatically, adding: “There’s a lot of pressure at family reunions, weddings, and birthday parties.”

And then some. As their not inconsiderable number of fans suggests (Dixie is no slouch in the followers department, with her account garnering over 29 million to date), the D’Amelio sisters are as adept as their parents when it comes to cutting a rug — particularly Charli, who has been studying dance since she was just three years old. Dixie, the more outgoing of the two, is better known for talky videos in which she puts her comedic chops to use.

They are also good sports. Despite their age and burgeoning popularity, they are self-effacing, forthcoming, and generous with their answers, which they deliver without bratty or calculated affect. Asked, for example, if she and Dixie are given to spats worthy of Kim and Kourtney Kardashian, Charli doesn’t skip a beat.

“I mean, we’re teenage sisters,” she says matter-of-factly, when we speak over Zoom in June. “So, obviously, we get into disagreements. It’s usually about clothes. We’re the same size, so I tend to wear a lot of her clothes. But Dixie is my number one go-to person — we’re just so close, and our fights usually last two seconds and then we’re over it and, like, ‘Hey, wanna go for a car ride?’”

The sisters are not always easy to tell apart — “We couldn’t be more different,” says Charli, “but we’re used to getting, ‘Oh my God, you guys look like twins!’”— especially on this day, on which they are both wearing high-waisted faded jeans and primrose-colored sweatshirts, their hair pulled back in a similar fashion. “That’s so funny,” says Dixie of their matchy-matchy outfits, “I swear, we haven’t even seen each other this morning.”

It’s a genuineness that goes a long way to explaining their regard on a platform that — despite its early rap for being inauthentic, a venue for creativity cribbed from elsewhere — places a premium on authenticity.

“Charli is accessible in a way I don’t think many other creators are,” says Taylor Lorenz, a technology reporter covering Internet culture for The New York Times. “She’s incredibly humble, and polite, and unproblematic, which is rare in the influencer space. I think Dixie offers a similar appeal. Both of them feel very down home and accessible.”

Stephanie Hind, Head of Talent Management and Operations at TikTok, agrees. “On TikTok, no matter what type of creator you are — an athlete, a designer, an entrepreneur, an artist, or anything in between,” she maintains, “you’re celebrated for being your authentic self. It’s been wonderful to see Charli and Dixie find success by staying true to their passions, putting in hard work and determination into their content, and showcasing joy, creativity, talent, and humor in such an authentic way.”

Adds the girls’ father, Marc: “As parents, in the beginning we were sometimes, ‘Why are you doing videos in your room with your bed unmade and clothes on the floor?’ But Charli understood instinctively that not only did she want to portray her true self but that the people consuming her content wanted to see that from her.”

Theirs is an authenticity that extends to their boundless positivity and the causes (climate change, Black Lives Matter, anti-bullying) that they promote on their accounts, without coming across as cloyingly earnest.

“I’ve been saying these things my whole life,” says Charli, who was tapped in March by Procter & Gamble to create #DistanceDance, a campaign to encourage people to stay-at-home during the pandemic that generated more than 8 billion views and 1.7 million imitation dances from celebrities, influencers, children, families, and others. “The fact that I now get to share that positivity is so important to me. It’s truly what I believe, and now people actually listen.”

“She is the number one person on the app, and has a lot of very young eyes on her,” says Dixie, fidgeting with a piece of toy slime. “I think she’s so happy to have the platform to talk about things that mean a lot to her. That’s important for me, too, but I don’t have the pressure that she has.”

Clearly it’s a genuineness that is resonating beyond the digital landscape. Charli is not only the most followed person on TikTok, but has also parlayed her popularity into collaborations with celebrities such as Jennifer Lopez and Bebe Rexha, as well as brands like Hollister and Sabra hummus, for which she appeared in a 2020 Super Bowl commercial (becoming the first TikTok creator to be featured in an ad during the coveted tentpole sports event). She has taken tentative steps into Hollywood, having provided the voice for Tinker in the upcoming animated film StarDog and TurboCat, and has appeared on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon.

She even sat front row at Prada’s Fall/Winter 2020 show in February, a gauge of pop-culture currency if ever there was one. “Going to the Prada show was definitely something, like, I never thought I would ever be…,” Charli recalls, uncharacteristically reaching for her words. “It was my first fashion show ever, and it was like a dream.” The content partnership she did with the Italian fashion brand during the show led to Charli’s social and press mentions growing by more than 160 percent in the days following the event.

Not to be outdone, Dixie, who studied drama from an early age, made her professional acting debut this year as Georgia in the Brat TV series Attaway General, and has collaborated on shoots and videos with brands such as Polo Ralph Lauren and Dermalogica. In early July, she released her first single, “Be Happy,” which debuted at 41 on the Emerging Artists list on the Billboard Charts and has generated more than 40 million views on YouTube. There is also talk of the D’Amelio clan appearing in their own reality TV show, the family having reportedly signed a deal with American Idol production company Industrial Media.

But for all their undeniable talent, personality, and relatable style (fans study the sisters’ choice of clothing, hairstyles, and nails with the rigor of biblical exegesis), their popularity is also the result of a perfect storm of circumstances. For one, they have an undeniably strong support system. Parents Marc and Heidi seem determined to ensure their daughters are happy and safe doing what they love most, while trusting them to make the right decisions and create content that they can be proud of.

“Unless it’s something that requires us to play the parent card,” says Marc, “we let them make a lot of the decisions about the opportunities that are presented to them. The girls are great. If there is something questionable, like foul language or whatever, they will ask, ‘Hey, what do you think about this?’”

Outside the family there is also a solid team in place. The sisters are both managed by Barbara Jones of OutShine Talent and Billy Mann of The Well, and represented by the Hollywood powerhouse United Talent Agency (UTA) — a division of labor which can be confounding to outsiders.

“If you watch the show Entourage,” explains Greg Goodfried, the Co-Head of Digital Talent at UTA, “the managers are Eric, who help Vinny Chase with every aspect of his life, and we [he and his colleague Ali Berman] are Ari. We’re the ones who source and negotiate the deal, and then hand it off to the managers and the client to execute.”

Charli’s rapid ascent — she only started posting last May — is inescapably tied to the rise of TikTok itself, which has gone from a popular global app with negligible traction in the United States to a social-media behemoth, with over 2 billion downloads that has shaken up the entertainment industrial complex and global Internet order. As Goodfried affirms: “It was the right time and the right place for the right person to just emerge on a platform and become a superstar.”

TikTok was an idea whose time had come, and it didn’t hurt that the Chinese conglomerate that owns it poured over a billion dollars into marketing in the first year alone. But there are other important factors at play, including the superior video editing tools the app offers by default.

According to Lorenz, its success lies in no small part to being the anti-Instagram. “It broke the follow graph,” she explains, “and makes all American social networks, where users have to seek out and curate their own feed of content by ‘following’ people, seem archaic. Follower numbers on TikTok are much more of a vanity metric. The ‘For You’ page allows each piece of individual content to live on its own and find its own audience. This is a much better and more engaging way to deliver content than by following an ever expanding group of people/accounts.”

It’s also an easier point of entry for video than Instagram and YouTube, on which aesthetics and production values are key. “With TikTok, it’s literally just your phone,” explains Ali Berman. “Combine that with the emergence of a generation of parents who are more open minded to [social media], and for the first time, people were like, ‘Oh, this is something I can do.’”

“Talking to a lot of my friends,” says Charli, “TikTok is bringing them and their parents a lot closer together, which is really cool. I see a lot of parents and the kids doing dances together. I think it’s awesome that it’s so inclusive of people of all ages.”

Little wonder that brands, with varying degrees of success, are lining up like superfans at a K-pop VIP High-Touch concert. “We’re seeing a ton of enthusiasm from brands,” says Berman, “especially around working with native TikTok creators. They’re really excited, because from a content perspective, it’s a whole new muscle for them to flex.” While opportunities for paid media exist, savvy companies — like Parisian fashion label Jacquemus — are artfully bringing the personalities of their brand to life through the creative usage of in-app effects and filters, and, in the case of Givenchy, which partnered with Young Emperors as a part of its #GivenchyActingChallenge, original sound to encourage user creations.

However, what TikTok delivered to creators, brands, and families at warp speed, the global coronavirus pandemic took away. Just as Charli and Dixie were poised to take advantage of the many opportunities that have promptly come their way, like much of the world, the family retreated indoors to quarantine — hunkering down in a rental property in California.

“I used to want a break from it all for a couple of weeks or so,” says Dixie, who has been accepted to the University of Alabama where she plans to do a business degree. “But after this quarantine period, I never want another break again. I was having the time of my life and I want to get back to work and travel and meet people immediately.”

Though the break temporarily put paid to a slew of meet-and-greet appearances with fans, and led to the rescheduling of several projects – including the Hollister campaign that involved print and videos (not to mention the cancellation of Dixie’s prom) — it has also led to them accruing more followers than ever, with their individual accounts and the combined family one surging over the last few months. They might have been cooped up inside, but so was everyone else — an eager, captive audience for entertaining video content.

It’s also afforded the family a moment to hit the pause button and assess matters. “It brought us a lot closer,” says Marc, “and we were able to have a lot of conversations to prepare for what’s next. Hindsight being 20/20, these are conversations we probably should have had earlier, but everything happened so quickly.”

“When I stop to think about it, I’m like, ‘Whoa, this is so crazy,’” says Charli. “I don’t even know how this happened. But if there’s one thing that I really don’t do, [it’s] overthink things.” Which is just as well, as in the weeks since we spoke, the news broke that TikTok may be banned in the United States due to national security concerns, and Charli and her ex, fellow TikToker Chase Hudson (better known as Lil Huddy) were involved in a messy war of words as part of the TikTok influencer debacle known as the “TikTokalypse.”

Not that anyone should worry too much about the D’Amelio girls. In addition to digital content opportunities, live touring, podcasts, books, TV, licensing deals, and endorsements are all on the table. They’re not going away anytime soon. And on the advice of their family friend, wine critic turned author and marketing guru Gary Vaynerchuk, Marc and Heidi have taught the girls not to “take the positives or the negatives to heart.”

Or, as Charli puts it: “My parents have always been, ‘We don’t care how many followers you have. You still have to do the dishes and take out the garbage. They don’t put me on a pedestal. And I’ve always been big on making sure that what I put out on the Internet about myself is stuff I would want everyone to see. I’m a teenager and [am] obviously not going to make the right choices 100 percent of the time, but I do my best to be the best person I can be, on and off screen.” Spoken like an authentic voice of a generation.

#tiktok #Charli & Dixie D'Amelio #TikTokalypse

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jacoblikes · 6 years ago

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Team Jacob — Jacob Kim for Grazia Korea

Instagram influencers are a dime a dozen these days, but Jacob Kim has managed to carve out his own niche as an industry mainstay. We sat down with him to chat about being his blog, his goals, and most importantly, his love life.

This is your first photoshoot for a magazine. How does it feel? Kind of surreal. I had to ask my boyfriend (supermodel Lim Enzo) for some tips before I felt comfortable.

You did a great job. Seemed very natural. Thank you.

Speaking of your boyfriend, you two really shocked the world with that dating announcement back in February. Was that your intention? Not exactly—though I do love a spectacle. I didn’t really think of it as much of an announcement, anyway. I had been hinting at it for weeks. We just wanted to share our relationship, because I think it means a lot to us and to other people that we do.

You were asked about Enzo in October, and didn’t have many nice things to say. Now your face lights up whenever I even mention his name. What changed?  I was… really hurting at the time. I’m really embarrassed about how I responded in that particular interview. As far as what has changed, everything has, and very quickly.

Most public figures keep their relationships very private, especially if they’re dating someone of the same sex. What does being openly LGBT mean to you? Sometimes I forget that I really am a public figure, and openly dating a man is sort of taboo, even in 2019. I guess it just means that I have the luxury and privilege to freely love who I love, and I don’t have to hide that part of my life from my readers and fans. I just wish everyone could do the same.

What made you want to start your blog? I was a journalism student at SNU at the time, and I thought I could get lots of practice writing, and also make some connections in an industry I loved so much already.

What advice do you have for anyone who wants to start a blog? Reach out to people who are already established in the industry as quickly as you can. Make the right connections, and they’ll help you grow faster than anything you’ll ever write.

You recently started a YouTube channel. How does that differ from writing for your blog? Well, first of all, editing videos is so much harder than editing my posts [laughs]. But I get more of a chance to share my life with my audience than I do on my blog. That’s actually sort of weird for me, but it is nice to open up a little bit more. I think a lot of people watch just because they hope to spot Enzo. Doesn’t matter to me, either way. Click’s a click.

Will you feature more of your celebrity friends in your vlogs? Sure, if they’re up for it. I’ve had loads of requests to vlog with Vogue’s Penny, and I’ve talked to him about doing that already. I don’t think people realize how messy that’ll be, though [laughs]. People are always asking for more of my sister (rapper Hara Juku) too. We’ll see.

You used to be a self-described “Gucci enthusiast,” but stopped promoting them after their many scandals. Do you have a new favorite brand? Dior men’s has been so good since Kim Jones became the creative director. I’ve been wearing a lot of Prada, as well. I’m trying to just wear pieces that I like, and to worry about the brand name less.

Is there a reason you hate Versace so much? I hate overpriced, ugly clothes. That’s it.

Any music you’re really into lately? I’ve had Minnie’s “Dance the Night Away” on repeat since it came out.

Do you think you’ll be an influencer forever? Or do you have other plans? I love fashion, and I love to write, so I don’t see myself changing careers any time soon. That being said, you never know what could come up in the future.

Where do you see yourself in ten years? With the way life has been going for me lately, I’ve come to just expect the unexpected, so I really have no idea where I’ll be. I can say for sure that wherever I am, I’ll be by Enzo’s side.

Any words for your fans before you go? Every day I’m thankful that I do what I do, and I wouldn’t be able to continue without the support from my readers. They make everything possible for me, and I’m really so grateful to them.

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lextenou · 8 years ago

Text

Mirandy Fic Rec Reviews 2017-07-11

I had a couple friends ask for some fic recs for Mirandy. I will be posting more as time allows. Fics are not rated by me - if they’re listed and I’ve written about them, I recommend you read them. I have also included my own thoughts on these stories and my favorite quotes from them. As these are reviews, there are spoilers ahead. Also, heads up - assume that all fics have happy endings unless I specifically say otherwise.

A Chance Encounter by smhfiction

Summary: Takes places five months after Paris.

When Andy is unexpectedly thrown headfirst into Miranda's life, none of them will ever be the same again.

Words: 46490

Ah, classic hurt/comfort. Andy witnesses the horrifying accident that almost claims Caroline's life, and manages to record what could easily be her last words on her cell phone, in addition to capturing footage of the accident itself. She drops everything to be with the Priestly family in their time of need, despite not having had any contact since that fateful day in Paris. Through ups and downs, including Andy's unexpected pregnancy after her one night stand with Christian, quitting her job instead of handing over the video of Caroline, and Miranda, the two of them come to a greater understanding of each other.

Though it begins as hurt/comfort rather dramatically, there are immediately strong domestic fluff elements. Touches of angst sprinkle through, with robust communication helping to pave the way to a happy ending. Anyone would have drama after being in a fatal rollover car crash, and Caroline is no exception. It comes out all good in the end, and the journey there is entertaining. There is strong dialogue throughout, which can be off putting if you're expecting more prose or examination of what is inside their heads.

The prose is tight and enthralling. Each revelation comes naturally and explains further their personalities and decisions. Characterization is dependent on if you believe that Andy had grown up after leaving Runway. If you do, its spot on. If you don't, it will be difficult. The difficulties that Andy has with her family over the pregnancy and her coming out are deftly handled. The movie that plays in my head as I read this one is incredible. Plus there are great fluffy scenes sprinkled throughout between moments of angst and terror. There are a couple of minor typos - "luck girl" instead of "lucky girl" for instance - that do not detract from the story. Some words are misused but their meaning is clear - alluded instead of eluded - with contextual clues giving more than enough understanding. These minor issues are easily overlooked if you don't get tweaked by them. If you do, steer clear.

Favorite part of the story: Andy's shiny steel spine. She stands up for herself and her child, she remains firm regarding her relationship with Miranda, and states clearly who and what she wants. It's delightful.

Favorite quote: “Look, Miranda. I am sorry for Paris and everything that you’re going through. I won’t pretend to know how that feels.” Miranda arched her eyebrow, but didn’t say anything. “I would like to be your friend, see where this takes us, and I will be there for you and both of your daughters.” She nodded satisfied with where this was going and clutched her yogurt to her chest. She could feel the tears beginning and fought them back. She seemed to cry over the stupidest things. “But, this is the last vanilla yogurt, and I’m sorry, but you can’t have it.”

How to Become a DragonMaster by dhamphir

Summary: After walking away from Miranda in Paris, Andy decides to make her way on her own terms and finds professional success in an unexpected way. This is her story. Question is, will it end the way she wants it to?

Words: 10960

Documenting Andy's determined personal growth after leaving Miranda in Paris, we see the ways in which Andy forcefully navigates the course of her own life. Eschewing anything from the world she knew, Andy is bound and determined to NOT owe Miranda a damned thing. Granted, this is hard since she wants to be in publishing. She makes friendships, and reaches great personal success because of the friends she makes along the way.

A bit dramatic, definitely slice of life, this one has strong character growth as the driving factor of its plot. If you want to see the way that someone can go from former second assistant to successful, this can show you the way. Lighthearted, but with a touch of gravitas, it does a lot in a compact story.

What I really enjoy about this is that it shows a natural progression of character growth. Andy's journey reads quickly, but is highly enjoyable. No real issues with this one - its well written and edited.

Favorite part of the story: That they come together as equals. Its something that is missing from a lot of stories, but is captured very well in this one.

Favorite quote: “I’m 53 years old.”

Andy’s smile widened into a grin. “Did I mention I like older women?”

Dogs? Really? by jehc

Summary: Miranda discovers that Andrea writes fan fiction.

Words: 23883

A sequel of sorts to "Cats? Really?", this story treats the first one as a fanfic that Andy writes during her downtime. For context, I do recommend reading the first. It gives much additional depth to this story.

Definitely comedic, with some of the best utilized crack elements I've ever seen, this story treats its subject matter with tongue firmly in cheek. It is almost as though we're part of a great big in-joke with the characters throughout, especially if you've read other Mirandy fics. It reads like a long form love letter to the fandom that still achieves its main accomplishment of allowing Andy and Miranda to realize they're head over heels for each other. I definitely recommend reading some other fics before delving into this one - it will make the experience all the more enjoyable. Don't let the humorous nature of this one fool you - there's still sprinkling of angst and idiots in love in these pages, up until the point that they properly communicate.

Switching back and forth in perspective between Andy and Miranda, this story does a lot to expand on their relationship in a fun way. The rollicking romp does a masterful job at keeping them in character and allowing them to explore further. Emily is wonderful in this as well; the little snippets of her are a riot.

The way that Miranda is presented is fascinating. Andy figures it out in a great line. "Most of the shit she does is a total goof on all of us. It’s like she is so smart that she is bored and she amuses herself by scaring people." The guessing at what jehc stands for is similarly riotous. It's fun, downright fluffy, and it just plain works.

Favorite part: the exploration of the Devil Wears Prada fanfic world. It is absolutely hilarious to read Miranda's responses to fanfic. Runner up: that Cassidy and Caroline write fanfic. It's delicious.

Favorite quote: When Emily realized what she had said all color drained from her face. Andy had been sure the Brit was about to pass out. Miranda had then silently locked eyes with the younger woman and after letting her stew for a moment reached out and patted her on the cheek.

“Well, Emily you have finally found the women’s section of the La Perla catalogue.” Miranda’s voice was low and silky. After another short stare down she said, “So pull up your new big girl panties and find me a new assistant!”

Like Andrea, Like Family, Like Life, Like Love by GinStan

Summary: Andy realizes Miranda is acting oddly and is determined to help her ex-boss.

Words: 30786, 48748, 99444, 295898

This series is one of the longest in my collection. Its epic length is outmatched by only a few in my entire library. It is definitely worth the investment.

Starting with Andy realizing there's something wrong - namely that Miranda has put out an all brunette issue of Runway - she inserts herself back into Miranda's world to find out what's wrong. Problem is, the thing that's wrong goes deeper than one might initially suspect. Angst and laughter inhabit this world, as does a memorable duet dance to Madonna's "Vogue" and a regrettable devotion to Cincinnati chili. The full fledged exploration of not just Andy's family, but Miranda's as well, is something I didn't know I wanted until I read this. The twins are threaded throughout with great effect, and the subplots are great.

Featuring some fantastic cameos by everyone's favorite beleaguered Detective Jo Polniaczek and her socialite/CEO wife Blair Warner (originally from “The Facts of Life”), the progression in this series is natural and enthralling. I've re-read it multiple times, and each time its a wonderful journey.

This is a story about family, love, and taking or making life as we want it. There are all sorts of things included in the mix - drama, comedy, angst, thrills, romance. From the start, it's clear that this journey isn't one that will take long to get them together - it is the domesticity and journey forward that drives this one. Family action and reaction is a major point of this story as well, with a cast as broad as is presented, there are numerous subplots that are able to be explored.

There are fabulous delvings into realistic responses. The biggest "gimme" in this fic, as in the thing you accept without question to make the story work, is that Miranda is so open from the start. The drugging makes it clear why this would be, and as the story continues, we’re given further explanation of just how devoted Miranda has been to Andy since before the start of the story. Miranda normally is so controlled with her displays that Andy wouldn't trust what she sees until she gets hit with a clue-by-four. In this case, that starts with the all brunette issue of Runway and gathers steam from there, so Andy gets on board quickly enough.

This series is one of those that is bandied about as a classic. It truly is. Not just for the length - that makes it epic. The story itself, the buildup of their relationship and how it grows and deepens...THAT is what makes this a classic.

Favorite part: Its hard to pick just one thing. Its so well built upon what comes before, but I'd have to say probably Andy and Miranda's families. The subplots with them make what is already real into so much more. Tante Louise is a hoot and a half.

Favorite quote: "Oh, Jo… When you tell your wife that you met Miranda… tell her, you wore the Armani, and that Miranda gave you a nod. You got that? A Nod. It's very important."

"What's so important about it?"

Andy grinned. "It's going to get you so laid." She laughed at the look on Jo's face. "Trust me."

It’s All Relative by Hawkbehere

Summary: Andy Sachs revisits her Runway past and finds the landscape changed.

Words: 214720

Ambushed outside of work by her fellow journalists, Andy is surprised to be told that Miranda has been shot. So begins this broad, riveting tale that spans everything from a hideous belt buckle, Dalton scholarships all the way to a moose head named Charles.

Miranda’s motivations are clearly elucidated in this one. It’s clear to us as intelligent readers exactly why Miranda is so insistent that Andy not leave - and when it’s discussed in the text, Andy sees it too. The mutual respect and uncertainty between them is explored, as is the need for them to find their own balance. Throughout, we’re given glimpses of a truly wicked sense of humor in Miranda. I about die laughing every time I read the following: Miranda lowered her voice and said in an accent straight out of Brooklyn, “You go big and you pay de tab—it’s de kissa death to guys like dat.”

This is one of those stories that leaves you with deep impressions and that you think about for years afterward. Between the varied cast and the incredible pacing, we’re introduced to characters that feel like family. It is a sadness to reach the end and no longer be able to spend time with them.

Hurt/comfort, drama, touches of comedy, domesticity, angst, family, altruism, the Dragon in full force - this story has it all. Subplots of other characters coming together and embracing what it means to fall in love are threaded through this, to great effect. This has one of my favorite Serena/Emily subplots. It also has fantastic medical research done for it, and it shows. Terminology and protocols are well portrayed. It also has a curious thread throughout - Miranda is the matriarch of an ever growing family, because Andy is there. It is downright heart-warming.

There are so many great parts in this story that it’s hard to winnow down which ones to discuss. This is one of those stories that you run across right before you want to pass out at 1am and spend the rest of the night reading. It remains one of the best novels I’ve ever read.

Favorite part: Miranda’s vast and varied accents are definitely up there. Jesus. So are all the characters. But my favorite part of all of my favorite parts is Emily’s wedding speech. To delight in the improbable is a gift.

Favorite quote: Caroline looked up into Dr. Allen’s eyes and saw something she hadn’t seen yet in this jovial tough-talking stranger. She realized it looked something like anger.

The woman leaned down and whispered, “I live emergency medicine. Unless you go into my field or off to war, you will never, ever see a fraction of the brutality or horror or sadness or bravery or goodness or sheer fucking grace of God that I do every day. That’s great for you but you know what?”

Caroline’s eyes began to sting but she jerked her chin so the doctor continued, “Sometimes? Sometimes God is really damned kind and a 30-ton truck doesn’t hit you or you don’t fall off the 10th story of a building. Sometimes, He sends exactly the right size enemy—something or someone you can beat if you’re willing and brave. He gives you a choice and a chance. When God’s feeling real generous? He sends someone like Andy a rat but sends someone like your mama that piece of shit who shot her.”

She lowered her voice another notch, “They both stood up and bled for the people they loved, you hear me girl? I have seen way too many people die who met something too big for them. Don’t you dare disrespect them. Not if you love them. You should thank God, Caroline. If they had to bleed and suffer, and evidently they did, you should thank God they met something they survived.”

#fic recs #mirandy #mirandy fic recs #shouldn't really be surprising that these are included #to those who read these fics that is #I've got a lot of fics to get through for this so I will be splitting this into different parts #about 1500 fics give or take a few series #hopefully I can get to a couple more fics in the next few days #this being posted is totally fullboyle's fault #love that shithead

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onminernstig · 6 years ago

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2019!

youtube

Drego & Beno - Swear To God (feat. Shoreline Mafia & GT)

Een greep uit de hoogtepunten..

Videos

A.G. Cubano - Understand (feat. TrifeGang Rich & Rico 2 Smoove)

A-Wax - Sympathize // Holy Water (feat. Ralow)

Bay Boyz - Good

BandGang Lonnie Bands - Moody

Berner x Mozzy - Thug In Me (feat. Godholly a.k.a. Hollywood)

Birdman x Juvenile - JAG // Dreams (feat. NLE Choppa)

Bossman x AzChike - Limbo

youtube

Bossman x Azchike - Limbo

Brill 4 the Trill - Back 2 Back (feat. Playa Red) // Night & Day

CML a.k.a. Lavish D - Demons

DB Tha General - In My Section

Dolla Dame - Envy (feat. FMB DZ & Philthy Rich)

Drego & Beno - Swear To God (feat. Shoreline Mafia & GT)

Ether - WAKA (feat. Fivio Foreign & Mr. Swipey)

FMB DZ - 2K19 // Thinkin Rich

Geechi x Prada Mack - Crunch Time

GT - Talk My S**t

HD x Lil Blood - Stomp Down

youtube

Geechi x Prada Mack - Crunch Time

Ice Burgandy x Drego & Beno x Bandgang Lonnie Bands x GT x VVS Beezy - How We Bommin

J-Diggs - Where J-Diggs At?

J.R. Patton - PDOE (feat. Tae Glizzy) // Cha$e A Bag (feat. Drae Steves x Greezy x OuttaTownBoog)

Lil AJ x Shoddy Boi x Young Bossi - Oakland CA To Akron OH

Lil D - Shoot It Out (feat. Yoey The Fundraiser & TrifeGang Rich)

Mistah F.A.B. - U Feel Me (feat. CML & Philthy Rich) // I’m a playa

OMB Peezy - One Me (feat. Sada Baby)

PeeWee Longway - Lituation

youtube

Ralph Sleeze - Forever

Peezy - New Car Smell

Pooh Hefner - I’m the Plug (feat. Mike Sherm)

Philthy Rich - Don’t Forget

Prada Mack x Geechi - In Tune With Us

Preddy Boy P x Strakavelli - Stay Dangerous (feat. Dolla Dame)

Ralph Sleeze - Forever

Rod Wave - Heart 4 Sale

Sada Baby x FMB DZ - Ape Drip

youtube

TrifeGang Rich - Yellow Tape (feat. TrifeGang Gzz x Trifemoney900)

Sammy Ghost - Hurt You (feat. Husalah)

San Quinn - Ain’t Nobody Thuggin’ // Breathe (feat. Street Knowledge)

SaySoTheMac - Move Right // 3 The Hardway (feat. WlaStevO x Big Sad)

Shordie Shordie - Betchua ( Bitchuary )

Shredgang Strap - 10 Shred Commandments

T-Nutty - Grave Digger

TrifeGang Rich - Yellow Tape (feat. TrifeGang Gzz x Trifemoney900)

Twoske - Stomp

Albums

Billy Woods x Kenny Segal - Hiding Places

Bloody Jay - Real 4 Ever

Boothatus - Popular Way The Mixtape

Brill 4 the Thrill - Brill Clinton // Bag Music

Celly Ru - Ru Gotti

Droop-E - Droopiter

Hit-Boy x S.O.B. R.B.E - Family Not A Group

Johnny Ca$h - In My Shoes

Ketchy The Great - Free Sauce

The Mekanix - Donuts

Nasty Nate - Destined For Greatness

Philthy Rich x CML - F** Yo Politics

Preddy Boy P x Strakavelli - Say Less

Prada Mack x Geechi - Tag Team Champions

Ralo the Pimp - Gentlemen of Leisure

Suga Free - The Resurrection

AzSwaye x Joog FTR - Swaye FTR

Tommy Grizzcetti - Grizzcifer

Tree - The Wild End

TrifeGang Rich - Self Made Self Paid

Offset Jim - No Pressure

Twoskee a.k.a. P2 - TheChronic2001AAHN

Loosies

A.R. Deville - Situation (feat. Ampichino, J. Stalin & Husalah)

Panda Badazz x Lil Bro x Ash Bash - No Kappin (prod. Rappa)

Preddy Boy P - Cuttin’ Deals

Rich The Factor - Free All The Real

Tru Carr - Still Gone Eat

03 Greedo - Grapevine (feat. Trilliano)

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iloveyouwhenidonthateyou · 6 years ago

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NYFW: Day One

At first, I thought it’d be weird recapping something that happened so long ago, but it’s actually kind of nice focusing on only the highlights. I mean, do you really need to know that on our way to our first show, Francisco and I ended up stuck in the worst traffic ever? Or that after walking several miles in my new shoes, I had to hobble to a pharmacy to buy blister pads because I rubbed my right heel raw and bled through my sock? Are all of these gritty details truly necessary in order to tell a good story? Of course they are! Who doesn't love a little drama? If you’ve followed this blog for a while, you already know that I love to highlight the lows just as much as the highs—it’s what makes my love/hate relationship with life so entertaining. In spite of the many bumps in the road we encountered, not just on day one, but throughout the whole trip, being back in New York City for fashion week felt amazing!

With only three events on our day one schedule, everything should've been a breeze, but when are things in the city ever easy? Our first event of the day was Indonesian Diversity, which showcases some of Indonesia’s brightest talent in a multi-designer runway show. Although we planned ahead and gave ourselves plenty of time to get to Industria Studios in the West Village, we ended up stuck in some serious construction related traffic, which gave LA traffic a run for its money. Luckily, our cab driver was a stunt driver on The Fast and the Furious—or so it seemed—so he got us out of the construction zone and to Industria’s doorstep just in time for the show. I’ll post actual runway photos separately, but as you can see from my phone snaps above, this year’s Indonesian Diversity designers were feeling bright colors, texture, and bold prints, all while paying tribute to their cultural heritage.

With one event down and the other two not happening until much later in the day, Francisco and I spent the next few hours wandering the streets, taking pictures, and trying to play it cool when we found ourselves walking next to a major fashion editor. As you may have seen in my last post, my day one outfit was all about retro-preppy vibes (basically, Gucci on a budget), and while I wouldn’t change a thing about it, sticking a heel cushion to the inside of my brand new penny loafers could’ve really saved me from a lot of pain. It wasn't right away, but somewhere between walking the High Line and stopping to get lunch at Ramen Thukpa (I dream about their stir-fried noodles and pork soup dumplings), the back of my right heel began to hurt. I tried to ignore it for as long as possible, but eventually, the pain became unbearable: too bad I reached that point while sharing a tiny sidewalk with an angry fashion editor from Harper’s Bazaar.

I’m not one to eaves drop on purpose, but if the Universe places me directly where some piping hot tea is brewing, I won’t resist. Now, before anyone gets too excited, I’m not going to reveal this person’s identity, but I will say that the phone conversation I witnessed was one for the books! Apparently, there was a mixup with a designer’s publicist not confirming the editor’s seat for an upcoming fashion show, which upset them to the point where voices were raised, hair was flipped, and verbal credentials were given—yeah, it was intense. Not wanting to be next on the editor’s take-down list, I quickly led a single file line of pedestrians down a narrow sidewalk with barriers on both sides, ignoring the fact that it felt like my heel was being stabbed with every step taken. The Devil may be know for wearing Prada, but that day, the Devil wore an impeccable winter-white coat and wide-leg trouser ensemble.

A quick trip to the pharmacy and a box of blister pads later, I was ready for more! Our second event of the day was the Blue Jacket Fashion Show at Pier 59 Studios. In case you’re unfamiliar with this event, the Blue Jacket Fashion Show is an annual runway show walked by celebrities wearing—you guessed it—blue jackets, in efforts to raise awareness and funds for prostate cancer research. Fearlessly walking the runway, actors, athletes, and personalities from all sectors of the entertainment industry put their celebrity to good use, and strutted their stuff for a great cause. I didn't get a ton of photos, but I’ll post a video of the finale in a separate post. Two events down, one more to go!

Our last event of the night took us all the way down to Manhattan’s Seaport District, an area we weren’t at all familiar with, and even though we got lost for a bit, once we made it to Celestino’s F/W19 presentation, it was all worth it. Talented, passionate, kind—I honestly can’t say enough good things about Celestino’s creator, Sergio “Celestino” Guadarrama. Already a big fan from the moment we met, my appreciation and admiration for Sergio grew when I learned of the brand’s eco-conscious practice of using up cycled fabrics, and their participation with various organizations that help those who have survived through traumatic experiences. Not just fueled by the need to create beautifully crafted garments, Sergio is a designer out to change the world!

After a drink and some good conversation with new friends, exhausted from a long day, Francisco and I called it a night, and took a car back to our hotel in the East Village. Although we should've gone straight to our room, we couldn’t resist popping into a nearby cafe for a sweet treat. Toasting to a successful first day of fashion week with the best chocolate muffin I've ever had, Francisco and I both agreed that this trip was already off to a great start.

#NYFW #NYFW19 #fw19 #New York #NYC #fashion #moda #runway #storytime #style by f.e.a

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calvarineharrod · 8 years ago

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#30DayWritingChallenge

I recently did the 30 day writing challenge. It made me think, ponder and dig deep into the different facets of my emotional and spiritual self. Sometimes you don’t really know yourself until you answer these questions. This my quest for soul search and I finally answered the questions that I was life-long scared to address.

Writing challenge:

Day 1: Things that make me happy: Braai Beautiful shoes Coke Zero My niece laughing Steers burger and chips Garden salad Deep conversations Troy, my dog Makeup trials The beach Drakensburg Mountains meditation Elevation church Podcasts Beautifully scented rooms

Day 2: Something that someone told me which I’ll never forget: I’m cheeky I have a beautiful soul. I have a big f*****g mouth and think I know too much.

Day 3: Pet peeves: Dirty feet Piled dishes in the sink Arrogant people Impatient drivers

Day 4: People who inspire me: Oprah - live your truth, be present in the moment, strive for excellence. Steven furtick: God can’t bless who you pretend to be. Be yourself. Lisa Bevere - God has uniquely made you and that is your greatest strength. Joyce Meyer - obedience is key to worshiping God. Forgive quickly.

Day 5: Places I want to visit: Cape Town Thailand Sydney India Zanzibar Bali

Day 6: Ways to win my heart: Kind-hearted Loves God Funny Courteous Ambitious

Day 7: Songs I love at the moment: Mercy shawn Mendes 24k Magic Kiss it better Rihanna Bad things camilla cabello Usher Crash Justin Bieber - cold water Ed sheeran - shape of you Closer - chain smokers This girl - Kungs vs cooking on three burners John legend - love me now

Day 8: Something I struggle with: Self-confidence, being single and procrastination.

Day 9: Words of wisdom that speak to me: Be the best version of yourself. Stay true to you and trust your instinct. You are uniquely loved and nothing can replace you. Don’t consume yourself with what others like or think. Don’t set deadlines for yourself. Be spontaneous. Your goals must be uniquely designed for you. What people think of you is none of your business. Be rational in stressful situations. Live life to the fullest and don’t wait for tomorrow to do something. Don’t attend every argument you’re invited to. Dornt allow every voice to have access to you. You are not a garbage truck. Don’t allow people to throw their toxic habits and gossip onto you. Be stingy with your time. Don’t procrastinate . Stay calm.

Day 10: What do I feel strongly about:

Women abuse - a man who has been put on a pedestal and not educated on how to treat a woman will spend his entire life mistreating one. Also when women don’t know their worth, men use reverse psychology to make women believe that no one will love them. So these girls stay in abusive relationships.

Modesty: boyfriends must not be given husband benefits. He must earn it. Likewise, girls clothe yourselves with dignity and respect. Don’t show off everything to gain attention. Be mindful of your behaviour. Don’t compromise and give men the bait to mistreat you. Give them something to respect. Being vulgar is not classy at all.

Christianity - I am entitled to my views about my relationship with God. I will not force it on anyone or dethrone it. I will defend it and not tolerate someone slandering the God that I worship.

Abortion - I believe in life after death and life before birth. Women behave loosely and then can’t deal with the consequences of being pregnant. Wait to get married before you want to have kids. Don’t go on a killing spree and abort your kids. Give them a chance at life.

Racism - how to test yourself to see if you’re racist? Ask yourself, will I accept my child marrying a person of another race. Will I feel comfortable with it. Will I be completely happy if my child had to marry a black, brown or even white person.

Day 11: Something your always think “what if” about: What if I don’t get married and never experience that feeling of loving someone and being loved.

Day 12: Blessings in my life: Family to love Job to work Church to freely worship. Shelter, Food, water and electricity Healthy body and mind

Day 13: What am I excited about? Honestly, nothing. I am looking forward to seeing what God is going to do through me. I know that he has great plans and nothing is impossible with God

Day 14: Favourite movies I’ll never get tired of watching: Blue streak White chicks The Notebook War Room The Breakup The devil wears Prada Dreamgirls Rush Hour Slum dog millionaire Why did I get married Mean girls Pitch perfect Notting Hill Love actually

Day 15: Bullet point your entire day: Woke up Brushed and bathed Attended work Came home Watched tv Ate Watched YouTube videos Read a few bible verses Went to bed

Day 17: Post your zodiac sign and whether it suits you. Pisces Don’t believe in it, don’t read it, don’t care.

Day 18: Discuss 30 facts about yourself: GO! Born in Chatsworth Youngest Granddaughter on both sides Received English award twice Love Indian food Jumped off Moses mabhida stadium Never travelled overseas Watched RHCP live Doesn’t eat mussels, crab or fish. Born again Christian Loves home decor and interior design Hates cats. Loves peaches and litchis Secretly fancy guys with nose rings. Want a tattoo but too scared to get one Have 6 piercings (for now) Hates clutch control. Doesn’t read fiction books at all. Got saved at 15. Baptised at 18 Loves any clothing in black Hates liquorice Doesn’t like bacon. Thinks Mohawks and Man-buns are stupid I’m Indian yet have never worn a sari. Had chronic acne and have to take meds for it. I have a strong instinct and good at figuring people out. All time Fave perfume is juicy couture All time Fave tv show is friends All time Fave singer is Mariah Carey. All time Fave hobby is reading Favourite season is Autumn Naturally I have very curly/frizzy hair. Day 19: Discuss your first love. I’ve never had one. Crushes, yes. Both never loved anyone to the point that it consumed my thoughts.

Day 20: Celebrity crushes: Hugh Jackman Ryan Gosling Morris Chestnut Dwayne Johnson David Beckham J. Cole Chris Hemsworth

Day 21: Lessons you want your children to learn from you: Love God Have compassion and unconditional love for yourself and people Be true to yourself and trust your gut feeling Be strong in who you are and defend yourself. Be loyal. Do things that your want to do, don’t compromise . Have good taste in music Be calm, meditate, don’t be stressed and overwhelmed. Know when to walk away. Don’t let people’s opinions define you. Make yourself happy, don’t live to make others happy.

Day 22: Put your music on shuffle and post 10 songs: Hillsong - From the inside out Emeli Sande - Clown Jagged Edge - I Gotta Be Israel Houghton & New Breed - More and More Kool & The Gang - Get down on it Kanye West - Father Stretch my hands (part 1) Hillsong - Heartbeats Ed Sheeran - Afire Love Anomaly - Lecrae Bruno Mars - When I was your man

Day 23: Write a letter to someone: A letter to my future husband:

I always wondered what you’d be like, your face, your eyes, your personality. To be totally honest, Over time, my type of the ideal guy has changed and I know for sure that the man I wanted at 15 is totally different from the man I want now, at 25. People ask me all the time, when am I gonna get married or find someone special? My response is always delayed and very nonchalant: I don’t know. Just so you know, I’m a wifey kinda girl. I love easily and love hard. I know that you are somewhere and I totally believe in Gods timing. By the way, I pray to God for you, about you and hope He leads you to me. I don’t know when, how and where, but I’m blindly writing this letter with the intention of finding you someday, my love. I’m loyal, trustworthy and find it irresistible when a guy is a gentleman. Just so you know, Chivalry is better than having a 6pack and your love for Jesus must be greater than your love for me.

In ending, I pray that our paths cross and that our love will be eternal. Sincerely, you no.1 lady.

Day 24: Write about a lesson you learnt the hard way: I appreciate peace especially since We grew up in an abusive household, not having much and rented out a little house., my dad has a drinking problem and parents used to fight, it was a tumultuous time. We had nothing worth much so I now know value things that I never had. I know what it’s like to work hard and own my stuff so I don’t depend on a guy or people to provide for me and hear hurtful words. I know not to have expectations in people because they will always disappoint, I’ve learnt that people will speak so fast behind your back and pretend to be loyal, I’ve learnt that work some colleagues will remain as that, work colleagues. You cannot try to change some one who doesn’t see a problem with their actions. I’ve learnt that it’s okay to outgrow friendships and relationships. I’ve learnt that it’s okay to walk away from conversations that make you feel awkward, pushes you to mean and degraded . To keep quiet and not retaliate towards every argument. Clowns will be clowns. I’ve learnt that girls are treated so much more differently than boys so we have to be fierce in our approach and not settle for being trophies, I’ve learnt to have compassion and tip extra. I’ve learnt that people treat you different and disrespect you when you are single. I’ve learnt that people are going through a lot and that’s usually the reason for their bad attitude and response towards life . I’ve learnt that God can only work with the amount of space your give him. I’ve learnt the meaning of surrender. I’ve learnt that God does speak, we just need to listen. I’ve learnt that you don’t have to please everyone and that’s ok. I’ve learnt that you must value and appreciate the people who love you for you.

Day 25: Think of a random word, search it on google and write something inspired by the 11th image: Repertoire. A quintet of musicians are playing brass instruments. I am a huge fan of jazz music so this random word perfectly describes the genre of music. This word also reminds me of Kendrick Lamar’s verse of No more parties in LA.

Day 26: An area in your life that you’d like to improve: Discipline. I wish That I could be more harder on myself to achieve more. I tend to be complacent because I’m very committed to my job, I have lots of responsibilities at home and can’t afford to live out certain dreams of what I want to do. I wish I didn’t procrastinate so much. I wish that I can be more disciplined in studying and not waiting for pressure to force me to learn. I wish that I was more disciplined with my eating habits. I wish I had more courage to enjoy life and take risks instead of caring what people think.

Day 27: Conversely, write about something that you’re doing well at: I think my mindset of thinking positively is great. I love the fact that I remain calm is very stressful situations. I tend not to get I overwhelmed and think rationally. I’m very hopeful and depend on miracles.

Day 28: Things that make you laugh: Memes posted by 9gag and Daquan. Kevin hart, Wanda Sykes Blame it on Kway DC young fly Alan Carr Angela and Marcus from “why did I get married” Charlemagne tha God Michael Blackson

Day 29: Goals for the next 30 days: Eat better Pray more often Get over my sympathy parties Read my bible more Relax a little Work harder and meet deadlines Drink more green tea Laugh more Treat myself better Stop trying to make others feel better at the expense of my sanity. Stop trying to not offend people and stifle my feelings. Realise my value Stop lowering my standards of doing things Watch less tv Write more Drive more Live in the moment, appreciate every moment Stay true to myself and be comfortable in my own skin Don’t feel uncomfortable to say no. Stand firm and defend myself. Be honest when asked my opinion. Less social media Mind my own business and help when asked Don’t meddle. Block negativity Don’t gossip about anyone Be cleaner and tidier Be more assertive in my approach Get disciplined enough to study Be consistent in writing a blog

Day 30: Highs and lows for the month: Highs- my birthday, opportunity to be more creative at work. Living a less stressed life. Being firm and happily single. Lows: stress at work, occasional low moments, which I am working on. Sudden bouts of sadness, fighting and arguing at home amongst family members. Loneliness is dangerous and make you do stupid, irresponsible things.

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