#that first one actually isn't too hopeless but i just........ struggle with where to begin

[catvampire]

things i wish i had the patience to write, from most to least likely for me to actually finish the thing

a lil one-shot from the pov of li & bu bu abt the horsemen showing up at iong’s after dylan’s near drowning (nysm)

a military era semi-simmvez thing (cm)

that fucking lioddeus fic to which i’d almost finished the first chapter before i got destructive and scrapped the whole thing (nysm)

the unrequited phoederic fic (musical thond)

[dreamiesdotcom]

smile (slow spin-off) | p.js, l.mk

Summary: Jisung looks at the camera and smiles, the kind of smile you show when the person you're in love with is looking — and maybe it's the smile you flash when you're silently hoping that said person falls as hard for you as you fell for them.

Word Count: 1.4k

Jisung remembers the first time it happened. He was in a Ferris Wheel, holding onto his notebook for dear life, eyes closed. In front of him was a longtime friend, and said friend was reaching out to hold his hand. When he opened his eyes, they're at the highest point and they're stuck because the ride has broken down.

Panic bubbled in his gut, but then quickly he realizes there's a hand wrapped tightly around his, that the sun is setting and he's got the perfect view. Peach skies around him, safe breeze. Jaemin was smiling.

Jisung remembers how he spent the night writing about the way he told him that everything will be okay — "I'm here, Jisungie. Sorry for asking you to go even if you're scared. It'll be alright, yeah?" — and he loses sleep.

Of course, he was scared. Hell, he was terrified. Even more when it doesn't go away the day after — or the next week, or the next months, then some more. He didn't want to get his heartbroken. In fact, he didn't want it so much that he would've never even thought of catching these kinds of feelings but oh, it was an easy fall. It was everything predictable.

His first love was way too charming to resist, laid down like an open book that held adventures only for those who looked and actually saw. Sentimental. Charismatic. Affectionate. How was Jisung supposed to resist that?

And if Jaemin so openly held his hands out to him, why would Jisung even try?

"But you know what, you really look good dancing with Jisung. I didn't know you could dance like that..." Jaemin drawls out one of the many times they held sleepovers at Renjun's place. He keens at the mention of his name, but he makes the mistake of looking at your direction — Jaemin smiled at you then. And he was shifting closer.

You only sighed and told him off, warning him "Stop moving or I'll fall!"

And that was normal, just another typical day — Jaemin's taking pictures of everyone but mostly you. He's smiling fondly, just like all the other times he spent with his friends.

Jisung doesn't know why, but it haunts him, Jaemin's reply to your warning — "Promise? You'll fall?"

It feels like if we stayed the way we are, just the two of us... we could've been way more, Jisung roughly scribbled in his notebook. He recalls how flashbacks flooded his mind as he writes the next line — If you knew, would you try?

Jaemin calls his name and snaps a picture. He smiles.

Jisung clearly remembers how he spent his first love wondering when Jaemin would realize that he's in love with someone else.

###

"Sometimes I get worried about Jaemin hyung. The two of them, they never seem to get the right timing," Chenle sighs the next day as they walk home together, peeking from behind the cracks of Jisung's mask.

The other boy stops on his tracks and looks at him dead in the eye, "Then I remember you. How many times are you gonna go break your heart?"

"I don't know," he quickly replies, voice brittle and already cracking. He sees no use in lying to one of his best friends, so he tilts his head and smiles, "How many times can your heart break for the person you love?"

Chenle snickers and spreads his arms out for a hug. Only then does Jisung break down.

The fall to his best friend's arms seemed like a slow motion, but then as he catches him and his tears, everything seemed to speed up and crash. They stay like that for several minutes, then Jisung decides to take the other way home; the one that leads him to the studio.

The only reason Jisung's first love isn't counted in the times he fell in love was because he never fell; it felt like a connection, immediate and instantaneous. He adored dancing without much fuss — there was no struggle. There was no fight. He loved this thing entirely with his whole being from the moment he was born, and then he lived for it. He breathed it like air, loved it like he'd break for it — because he will, heaven knows that. He didn't fall in love with dancing — he ran to it and let it wrap him in its hold.

And that's what he does right now. He lets his heart drop and break and he dances, he dances until his feet burn and hurts so much that it makes him forget the ache in his chest. It works.

A little.

He convinces himself that it does but then —

Flashes of Na Jaemin's hopeless smile. His giggles. His antics. His eyes.

It doesn't work.

###

He's moved on, at least he thinks, but someway somehow, it seems like first love really does hit different than all the others. There are some days when Jaemin still disturbs his memory, and he thinks of what could've been and what they could've had.

Those times don't come as frequent these days, but it only takes Jisung two months to realize that it's because he's been thinking of another person. The one that creates beats for Jisung to dance to, and then watches him with intense admiration and a smile that has become the subject of most of his dreams.

Jisung met Mark on a busy day, his stress level high up, his heart ravaged. It's for some kind of showcase he was a part of — if he knew he'd have to work with strangers, he really wouldn't have participated — and the snowball begins from there. They knew each other. They became friends. They grew pretty close, and that was fine.

That would've been fine.

Only that Jisung tends to take more than he should've and even more than what he can handle.

Now, that was not fine.

But right now Mark looks real pretty stargazing beside him. He looks like something straight out of a dream, the kind of trance that would make you smile. He'd be the heart-fluttering kind, one of the feelings Jisung's always been scared of, but he'd be the sensation he'd chase.

The way he grins is damning, "You did well. Up that stage, you looked like you're competing with literal stars."

Right now, Jisung thinks, nothing this good could be that bad. If it was, he knew that it's the kind that he won't regret.

It's extremely out of character and his cheeks flush crimson as he stumbles over his words, but he dares try — "Well, did I win, hyung?"

Mark stiffens at that, never expecting such daring words from the younger who just laughed sheepishly. His heart does this dumb thing where it beats loudly against his chest, his hands setting down his guitar and opting to reach for his camera. Mark opens it and stares at random photos as a diversion, nervously chuckling.

Jisung understands that feeling well. Although he only fell in love twice in this life, having those two be the most heart-fluttering people he knew just really tends to drive him a little incomprehensible, gives him a preview of how weird the things you can feel when you fall. He doesn't tease him for a similar blush on his cheeks, or the way he keeps on snapping the same picture of the grass. Truth is, his heart is also weakly thumping against his chest. He knew that it was never a good sign, but he can't even deny it now. He knew where it would go.

"The stars stood no chance against you," he drawls out, the sound of a shutter at the end. Jisung turns to his direction, and then holds his breath. That laugh. That damned laugh — the things Jisung does just to hear that.

Mark counts down from three to one, "Jisung-ah, pose for me?"

So Jisung looks at the camera and smiles, the kind of smile you show when the person you're in love with is looking — and maybe it's the smile you flash when you're silently hoping that said person falls as hard for you as you fell for them.

He hears again a count down to three, Mark's lovely peal of laughter, and then bright light strikes. Jisung blindly remembers that they lost themselves to giggles after that picture, and that they were happy, and then everything was unclear.

And maybe he remembers that after everything, later that night when he talked about dreams and the stars, between those hazy moments and the tune of the other's guitar, he hoped that Mark would finally realize that he loved Jisung.

[empathic-seer]

About

Name: Sheridan Dwyer

Age: 18(TWEWY), 21(Neo-TWEWY/Post Neo)

Height: 4’9/144 cm

Gender: Female

Pronouns: She/Her

Sexuality: Questioning but identifies Bisexual

Occupation: Full-time College Student for Nursing, works part-time performing whatever jobs she can get for acting and voice acting. Keeping her eyes open for an opening at WildKat.

Biography:

I’d mostly prefer for the details to come out organically, but she lives in Shibuya to pursue Nursing school and has a tiny apartment all her own.

Her mother has suffered from chronic pain and other ailments since she was small but they’re super close, her biological father treats her like a child and tries to buy her love with money and video games and her mother’s now ex was severely emotionally and verbally abusive as well all the way until he was finally kicked out when she was 14.

Her mother has kept in some contact though she’s readying to cut him off completely and Sheridan still stiffens at the sound of his voice and can recognize him by his knock.

She’s always seen the UG, but she didn’t learn or see nearly as much as she does in Shibuya due to being from a smaller town in New York. It was mainly just Noise.

She was born at 1 pound 11 ounces and before the third trimester, leading to her nearly dying twice. According to her Mom, she had the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck, so she wasn’t getting any nutrients. After that scare, 3 days later her oxygen levels suddenly went down to single digits, to the point a priest was called in to give last rites. Once the cross was drawn on her forehead her oxygen levels shot up and haven’t come back down since.

Sheridan assumes this is why she can see the UG, though she has no idea why she was saved and it’s something she struggles with often.

Speaking of the Game; boy is she conflicted about it. She probably shouldn’t be, but she helps any Players she can if she catches them in a reaper decal store, warning them of approaching Noise and often putting herself at risk to help them find Partners to give them a fighting chance. She’s also known for interfering more directly by taking infective Noise onto herself. She can’t take seeing others in pain and would rather deal with the ensuing negativity than have another go through it.

So yeah. Oops. As far as her conflict with the Game itself, she loves the fact people get a second chance, and even understands entry fees and their purpose to help others grow. But the erasure part...that she struggles with. It takes a big emotional toll on her and she can’t grasp why it’s necessary as she doesn’t understand the inner-workings enough.

Thoughts on the Games:

The World Ends With You:

Speaking of the Game; boy is she conflicted about it. She probably shouldn’t be, but she helps any Players she can if she catches them in a reaper decal store, warning them of approaching Noise. She’s also known for interfering more directly by taking infective Noise onto herself. She can’t take seeing others in pain and would rather deal with the ensuing negativity than have another go through it. All the better if it helps out Players on the way.

So yeah. Oops. As far as her conflict with the Game itself, she loves the fact people get a second chance, and even understands entry fees and their purpose to help others grow. But the erasure part...that she struggles with. It takes a big emotional toll on her and she can’t grasp why it’s necessary as she doesn’t understand the inner-workings enough.

She recognizes she has a lot to learn, especially being only a bystander who mainly watches from the sidelines.

At the end of the Game, nimbly avoids wearing an O pin after seeing the effects from the Game, she hides out in high Imagination areas like Udagawa, the River and WildKat to feel safer. The conformity scares her, she’s always felt different but being alone in a sea of people with the same goal...she never wants to feel so isolated again.

Neo:

As far as Shiba’s Game...she does not like the change.

The UG she’d come to expect was turned completely on its head and it’s even worse.

She understood most of Joshua’s Game. The checks and balances set in place, Reapers and Players, entry fees...all of it save the erasure.

But now the erasures have increased with one team winning nonstop and all she can do is watch in horror as it happens. So many people...Erased without a thought week after week. It’s emotional torture for her as an Empath honestly. The horror, the fear, and then just...nothing.

The shifting energy is much darker than the conformity at the end of the original and she can tell something dangerous is happening, though she can’t grasp what.

Worries over the Wicked Twisters and keeps tabs on their emotions throughout the Game since they’re so much smaller than the other groups.

To say she was shocked when both Neku and Beat were in again was an understatement. She thought they’d escaped. There’s so much she doesn’t know but she watches even more intently when she can from then on.

Feels Shoka’s struggle and wants to help the girl escape the toxic influences surrounding her and get in a better environment.

Just wants everyone to be safe and healthy and for the suffocating air to be breathable again.

Tidbits:

Has always felt drawn to Shibuya River, and WildKat Cafe. There’s a...quiet. A calmness she never gets anywhere else. Particularly in the river. It’s just herself and her own emotions for once but even they feel muted there. Darker thoughts even if present is quieter, and become white noise in the wake of the sound of the river flowing.

Tends to loiter quietly and shyly steal glances at Hanekoma and Joshua if either is in the cafe but too intimidated to actually approach. Something feels...otherworldly about them. Her intuition can tell something is powerful about them so she’s always kept her distance despite feeling a pull towards both.

That goes the same for Hazuki as well, of course.

All Higher Plane beings in her experience mute her Empathy, though she isn't sure why. It's part of why she's so on edge around them, both wanting to be near and torn on approaching.

The library is another place you’ll find her, sequestering in a lone corner far from others and likely reading some supernatural romance aloud or working on a story.

Chronic fatigue is a bad side effect that’s pretty noticeable if she’s been giving too much of herself to others and letting herself be drained. In high school, she’d come home and have to nap for an hour or 3 depending on the day just to recover from the constant negativity she took on from all her “friends”. She still finds herself in that state pretty often, though not as bad nowadays as she’s trying to learn healthy boundaries.

Personality:

Sheridan is very openhearted and kind. Often way too trusting and forgiving for her own good despite having very good intuition. She’s very quick to inquire how others are but brushes off when asked about herself and quickly redirects. She’s very comfortable when it comes to taking care of others since she had a sick mom to take care of all throughout childhood. It’s instinct for her to see if anyone needs anything and she’s ended up flustered many a time by accidentally asking “are you ok?” or “do you need anything?” since if she drifts off or gets bored it’ll pop out sometimes after living with her mom for so long.

She’s also an Empath, meaning she feels what others do and experiences their emotions as her own. She tends to have her guard up a little, she doesn't want to accidentally get too much of someone unless they're ready to give it, but she also doesn't want to leave someone in crisis. She...has a bad habit of attracting people who use her as an emotion dumping ground and letting them stay way too long.

Sheridan feels like her whole purpose is to help others. Like it's all she's good for. She's really struggling to learn that selfish isn't a dirty word and that she's allowed to want things too and to get upset and that what she says is worth listening to.

Easy to think about, but hard to put into practice. She's learned when people ignore her or especially talk over her to quiet down. 'Clearly they just really need to talk right? I didn't have anything important to add anyway." Or so her thought process typically goes.

She tends to be shy at first but if given positive reinforcement and encouragement she’ll slowly warm up. She does best in intimate, small groups.

Seems like she doesn’t have a sense of humor but is actually pretty funny now and then. She just has to feel comfortable enough to crack jokes in the first place.

People tend to look at her in shock if she curses since when she’s first meeting people and in the warming up phase, she seems very polite, kind, and innocent to a fault.

Easily flustered, especially by teasing. Any person she’s even a little bit attracted to she’ll likely be at least a little pink, fidgety and sheepish. It doesn’t take much either. Corner her, pin her, or even just direct eye contact could be enough to make her go red. She’s hopeless in that regard since she’s very inexperienced.

Severely touch starved but way too scared of rejection to initiate or confess as much so she just kinda suffers in silence.

An easy crier. Cries at the drop of a hat. Even when angry, she cries because no matter what she’s hurting to be angry at all given it’s typically very rare for her to begin with. Feeling what everyone around her does has led to her being a every emotional person in her own right.

Hobbies:

Enjoys acting and performing more than anything, even though she’s yet to be cast as a lead or anything major except in her theatre final, where she got to play Doris from Fame. One of her favorite roles. She loved participating in high school at her musical theatre program and did stage crew all the way up to 11th grade when she finally made it in and got to be in first the ensemble and then lead ensemble the following year. She often gets typecast as the “cute one” or child roles thanks to being 4’9 and being very accommodating and kind.

Somewhat hand in hand with acting and performing, but singing. Gets stage fright occasionally but is able to push through it.

Reading body language is something else she finds very fun, but she never voices it without explicit consent. She likes to people-watch in Shibuya and guess their lives inwardly to keep herself fresh.

Plays video games very often, especially RPGs as well as reading to escape her troubles. It’s a great way to combat loneliness and also not think for a while, to lose herself in another world.

Writes as well, to vent her negative thoughts. Typically through a fanfiction blog for x reader fandom and kpop content in 2nd person. A bit shy about voicing it though. Has original ideas and has started a book but trying to build her own world and the magic system has proven a bit difficult.

Reading supernatural romance novels. Her favorite genre since the worlds and characters are typically very immersive and serve as great escape potential. Loves to find a corner, make sure she's completely alone, and voice act the characters as she reads. Y'know, like a nerd.

Likes to bake, especially different types of cookies. It’s a great stress reliever. She has several video game recipes she wants to try to learn though. Particularly the butterscotch cinnamon pie from Undertale and sea-salt ice cream from Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days.

Binging guilty pleasure shows. Loves laughing at trashy reverse harems with friends like Diabolik Lovers to both appreciate the hotness of the designs and voice acting and also how awful the characters are as people. Doesn’t mind thirsting over toxic vampires, but obviously only in fiction.

Anxiety:

Mental Health: Not great, though most likely wouldn't guess so. She'd much rather help others, see what they need than have them focus on her. She's very much not used to that and doesn't know how to react.

(Important Note! Please do NOT feel pressured to include anything below in our rp and if you ever need a specific thing added as a trigger tag do let me know! My Trigger tag format is Trigger; ______ if you need to block any! I'm open to it of course, given I included them in my form I just want to make sure everyone I roleplay with has the tools to tailor the experience to them and feel secure.

If I want to start a thread or anything about the issues below I will likely message the Mun in advance first for permission first unless they've stated they're explicitly fine with such content and apologies in advance if I'm awkward when reaching out.)

She tends to have panic attacks thanks to severe arachnophobia and it can take her a solid hour to work up the courage to try and kill one, typically while she's crying and whimpering to herself to "breathe Sheridan, that's it breathe…"

She tends to get bouts of social anxiety. When she's acting it's fine because she's not her, and the same for if she's in an intimate group.

But especially if someone starts yelling at her? She'll likely freeze and then look to run away before the person sees her crying. She can't stop shaking and can barely breathe. It's awful and a huge trigger for her. Even if it's not directed at her she'll still panic.

Also suffers from driver’s anxiety. Still only has her permit since she hasn’t found anyone who can put her at ease enough and that she wouldn’t be embarrassed to break down with.

Asperger's Syndrome/Autism Spectrum Disorder:

High functioning but a big person to hyper-fixate and jump from one fixation to another especially when in a bad headspace. Can become obsessed and may need to be gently pulled back/ forced outside.

Stims, mainly physically. Squirms before sleep mainly because her brain won't shut off.

Soft/smooth stims are her favorite anxiety soothers.

Has a rainbow bear with purple eyes she's had since childhood that is a stim she uses to calm from panic.

Clutches her necklace; an Undertale plaque that reads in white text '*a determined soul' and has the rainbow SOUL hearts above it. Uses it as a source of strength.

Bounces her leg when she can but has mainly learned to force herself to stop.

Only does this one when not around her mom since both share the same stim and her Mom said it made her nauseous.

Depression:

Frequent intrusive negative thought spirals and suicidal ideation. Thoughts of self-harm, in a similar vein, though she’d never act on it.

Unfortunately, knowing they’re irrational doesn’t stop the thoughts from happening way too often for her liking.

Her becoming overwhelmed by her emotions and breaking down for 3 hours is commonplace, as is her ghosting for way too long. A bad habit because she doesn't want to burden anyone when she’s not even able to be there for them.

Basically, if she isn’t serving others she feels she shouldn’t exist at all but she’s trying to understand she has worth all on her own.

Eating Issues:

Body dysmorphia with her weight. She tends to not eat often and even if urged she hates that she has to force herself and typically puts herself down which can lead to a spiral if she’s not careful.

Sometimes she's fine. But even when "fine" she'll typically have something small like a muffin, and a 1/4 of dinner and that's all she'll eat.

She snacks because she doesn't have to think when she eats it if she's distracted. Things like popcorn, pocky, or pretzels are her go-to's.

Kind of wants someone to be able to care enough to notice inwardly and maybe text her to see when and what she's last eaten but doesn't ever want to emotionally dump like others do to her because she doesn't want to be a burden or pitied.

CPTSD:

She had her first emotion flashback recently having to do with her abuser and has been shaken ever since, trying to deal with it on her own. Yelling is a trigger for her, especially when paired with degradation.

Forced "civility" as well.

There was a period while her mother was unaware of the extent of the abuse given Sheridan was still trying to protect her. Over the course of 3 years nothing but good night and good morning, passive-aggressive and snide comments of "aren't you going to say hi/bye/thank you/your welcome?" anytime she was too crippled by anxiety/fear to look at him, let alone speak was the norm.

Relationships:

None yet! Just let me know if anyone wants to be added and I’ll happily do so! <3

[sulkyprince]

Hi there! I just wanted to request a Prompto x Reader related scenario. I was thinking that maybe since Prompto had self esteem issues growing up due to his weight, maybe he isn't really experienced with the concept of love despite acting like he is. But when he meets his s/o and falls head over heels for them, he is finally able to experience this. He finally has his first kiss with them and it makes him so overwhelmingly happy. Maybe then he'll even open up about his past with them.

@reticentseiko

Yes okay sorry this took so long~ I hope this is along the lines of what you were hoping for dear and once again I thank you for your patience and for taking the time to contact me and clarify more as to what it is you were wanting.

Prompto had always been a bit of a hopeless romantic, although he never really had the courage or the skills to talk to those he found himself so head over heels for. So when he met and quickly fell for his s/o, and they /finally/ said they’d go out with him, he couldn’t’ contain the total overwhelming mix of excitement and gratefulness he felt. Even then, it was hard to believe that they had really chosen him, and they were /actually/ a couple now. As a result, Prompto would still be a little sheepish when it came to physical affection. It’s not that he doesn’t enjoy it, quite the opposite, it’s just that he doesn’t really know what to do with himself. He can’t stand how jittery and red he gets, always stumbling over his words and embarrassing himself. It felt safer just to keep his distance, lest he come on too strong like he always does.

However, this hasn’t stopped him from /trying/ to initiate a first kiss. One time, they were both huddled up on his couch playing video games. He’d asked them oh so slyly to lean over and hand him some of the chips sitting on their side. He was nervous and stuttering, mouth tightened in determination as he’d been planning out over the last few hours the perfect moment to make a move. He’d been fumbling and performing miserably in the game as a result, much to his s/o’s enjoyment. Just as they reached across the couch to hand him the bag he leaned in for a kiss, his s/o quickly turning their head at the last moment as they were still entirely invested in the game and hadn’t even noticed his advances. The failure had discouraged him for the rest of the night as he tried to come down from the adrenaline rush.

The second time he lowered his stakes, aiming for a quick peck on the corner of the mouth just as his s/o was turning to point at one of the chocobo chicks waddling by at Wiz’s ranch, causing him to miss and kiss the hair covering their ear instead. He covered his mouth in embarrassment, apologizing but his s/o just laughed lightly. At least now they got the idea.

They waited for the right moment to surprise him with a peck on the lips as they were both heading back inside the caravan after a long night of not being able to sleep when the rest of the group laid down for bed. As they bumped hips both trying to get to the back of the tightly packed caravan where the sleeping quarters were, Prompto halted to apologize while his s/o leaned in for the kiss. Prompto had been so shaken he yipped, gloved hand gripping onto the small counter, face burning. His s/o leaned back some, Prompto’s hand instantly gravitating to their bicep as he swallowed deeply in his immense lack to form words. His s/o would just smile, that is, until they saw the emotion that came over the freckled boy. His face twisted from shock to… sadness? And wait… were those tears? /Oh gods./ As his s/o rushed to comfort him, asking what was wrong, Prompto would merely shake his head, trying just as hard to reassure them that he was okay as he was gathering himself.

“No… Really.. It’s okay I’m just-… I just- I never…” He bit his lip as he admitted his defeat with words, needing more comfort and reassurance so that he could muster the courage to continue.

They’d hardly be able to believe their ears, however, once the boy started talking of having never been kissed before. They still might have to really press him to open up as to what else was weighing on him so hard, leading him outside away from earshot of the others while constantly assuring him that he was loved and wasn’t being judged. Once in the safety of the quiet outdoors he’d spill his past. His past of being this awkward outcast who was overweight and was never able to get along with anyone. A boy that came on too strongly and pushed so many people away, building a wall so that no one would see the vulnerability inside.

Although the confession was crushing, knowing everything of his insecurities, his struggle with opening up to others, his parents that were never there, his s/o still hugged him and held on tight, not stopping despite his questioning noises and nervous squirming. None of that mattered, they were just happy to be with him, and of course hearing that left him emotionally overwhelmed beyond his capacity handle things. He’d simply stare at them, considering the weight of their words before he’d begin to wipe at at steady, nonstop flow of tears, assuring them that they were ones of happiness.

He’d never felt so loved, all of his pain poured off his chest in front of the one that mattered most. He felt born again, thanking them for everything they’ve done even though a little kiss and their time was all they felt they’d really given. But to Prompto, it was the world.

The extra sunshine in his step the next day was enough to light up the entire caravan, leaving the others wondering just what had gotten into the already chipper young man. But of course deep down everyone knew, deciding to keep quiet and save the teasing for later. Prompto was sure head over heels this time.

[sftswigan]

Manchester gutter punks, The Battery Farm, talk to us about horrific crime inspiring a song and how they just had to form this band...

We’ve got frontman/guitarist Ben from the band.

Alright Ben, can you tell us about the band. Who plays what and how the band got together?

Hallo! We are The Battery Farm, four gutter bastards from Manchester playing gnarly, seething punk rock music.

Ben Corry on Vocals and Guitar, Dominic Corry on Guitar, Paul Worrall on Bass, Sam Parkinson on Drums. Me and Dom formed this band from the ashes of a band we'd previously been in together for 8 years. At the point we formed The Battery Farm we were in a low place, feeling like failures, feeling defeated by this thing that we'd built for years just imploding, feeling angry and scared and hopeless at the utter state of the world. We basically decided to do this in the pub one night when we felt like we had absolutely nothing to lose. It was formed as a desperate reaction to two lives and minds spiralling out of control in a hostile, hateful world.

That must have been tough but, seems like it’s worked out well and the band from what I can tell is going from strength to strength. How soon did you find the remaining members, Paul and Sam? What have they brought to the band?

It has actually. Helpfully, it was a fertile environment from which to create. The first wave of songs - stuff like I Am a Man - are the purest distillation of that sense of lashing out, that sense of desperation we were feeling at the time.

We found Paul pretty much straight away. I'd known him for years through Manchester's Fringe theatre scene, having been in a couple of plays with him. He'd come to see me in a play, I knew he was a musician as well as an actor (although I don't think I'd grasped just how good he is), so I asked if he fancied playing bass for our new band. Sam we actually didn't know before the band, and it took a little longer to get him in. He works for the same company i do and I'd heard he was a drummer, so I got his contact details, asked him if he fancied coming for a rehearsal with us. It all clicked, and the rest is history.

Paul and Sam bring a massive amount to the band. They lift the songs me and Dom write and add a very particular combination of power and melody which you'll be hard pressed to come by very often. They're fucking ace and they know what is good for the song. No ego, no fucking about. They know what's important.

Sounds like you needed that new band to form quickly and to find drummer and bassist when you did you was very fortunate. I watched an interview of you and Dom recently and you talked about inspiration for songwriting and I was interested in where 97/91 came from. When it comes to writing where do you first look to for ideas?

Yeah we did, finding a drummer was comparitively difficult and I think if we'd have really struggled then we honestly would have just given up on it. 97/91 came about after I read an article about the murder of Suzanne Capper in Moston, north Manchester, which is where me and Dom grew up. I'm not going to go into details but if you look it up you'll see that it's the most horrific thing you've ever read. It stuck with me for weeks afterwards, and part of that was because I knew the streets where it had taken place and the community in which it had taken place. The houses it happened in - numbers 97 and 91 - are still there to this day. I got to thinking about why I reacted so viscerally to that story in particular; atrocities happen every day and we don't bat an eyelid, not really. It had such an impact because I was so familiar with the setting, so familiar with the type of person involved. It was too real. 97/91 explores the idea that we make a trade-off in our lives, one which enables cognitive dissonance that shields us from the impact the mass, relentless violence of the world. It also means that when something evil happens in a familiar setting the impact is much greater.

How can it only be real when you can see it? 97/91 isn't necessarily about the Capper murder itself, but the murder is a jumping off point to explore the faustian pact at the heart of the human condition, the one that keeps us sane but also ebbs away at our souls.

Our ideas just literally come from trying to explain our perspective on the world, we don't necessarily make a conscious effort to look in one place for ideas. We just write about whatever moves us. That can be mental illness, corrupt political systems, or the fact that I've never been to Gorton, which is literally the title of one of our new songs.

I find reading about crime stories really interesting, it’s madness what goes on in this world! This is one I’m not aware of but this must have been difficult to write about with it being so close to home? I love the anger and aggression in your music and lyrics.

You mentioned being an actor earlier, do you think this has an influence on your performance as a front man?

Yeah I went through a short phase of listening to true crime podcasts earlier this year but i had to stop bec it was all too grim. It was difficult to explore the ideas that particular incident led me onto but the endgame wasn't to just write about the murder itself, so I suppose keeping that in mind kept my head clear and made things easier.

Honestly, i try to keep any ideas of acting and theatre separate from the band. The actor thing can be frustrating at times because people conflate that with what I do in the band and think that everything must be a performance of some kind, which it isn't. The whole idea of putting The Battery Farm together was that it could give us an outlet to express ourselves honestly, and to me the stuff I do as a frontman is just an honest reaction to what I'm singing and what it makes me feel. I try not to overthink that aspect of it because I feel like to do so would water it down. It needs to be raw, it needs to be stark, it needs to be reality. If it's an actor's performance I'm not really getting anything out of it.

It’s amazing how reading/listening to one can lead on to another one. But yeah hard to shake off once you’ve learned about them.

You’re performance on stage seems very honest and I love to see in a frontman.

Moving on to the music scene...Manchester in particular is buzzing at the minute. Did the band find it easy to slot in? What’s been your favourite gig up to now?

We did actually. We knew a couple of people anyway from being in previous bands but until now I'd always found the Manchester scene a little unfriendly. It's totally different now. Not only is it overflowing with incredible, original, exciting new bands but it's also full of amazing people, and in the year we've been gigging we've made some wonderful friends. There's a proper sense of inclusivity and community, a lack of ego and aloofness that wasn't there before.

My favourite, and I think the others would agree with me, is our first headline set which was at The Peer Hat last November. It was an Abattoir Blues night and they're always amazing. The venue was packed to capacity and the atmosphere was electric. It was the kind of big, simmering sweatbox that seems impossible to imagine in the current climate. I want every gig we play to be like that one.

Yeah it’s great to see bands appreciating each other’s music and plugging their stuff on social media etc. I love going to Manchester for a gig. It’s a great time for guitar music in the UK at the minute with bands like Idles, Fontaines DC and Sports Team doing really well. And also The Blinders bringing album 2 out very soon!

That gig sounds like a great night!

When all this is over and we get some normality back...what are the bands plans?

Well, we're heading into the studio later this summer to begin work on... something. Beyond that it's hard to say because like everyone else we can't really make plans at the moment. Like everyone else we're pretty much having to make it up as we go along. We do have gigs booked for November and December but whether they'll happen or not remains up to fate. Everything going to plan, we may be in for an exciting end to the year. Maybe.

Gonna be very exciting for all bands and music once gigs/recording etc can happen again isn’t it.

Got so many new bands I want to see. Have you discovered any new bands during lockdown? If not, what have you been listening to?

Lockdown's actually been really fruitful in terms of new bands releasing amazing stuff. I've been listening to a lot of Tinfoils recently, they're a delight! Also been loving new stuff from Cold Water Swimmers, The Red Stains, Richard Carlson Band, The Maitlands, loads of stuff. I've also recently discovered John Shuttleworth, a comedy singer from Sheffield who does weird Phoenix Club-type songs about stuff like margerine and vans. I love stuff like that, real end of the pier nonsense.

I love Tinfoils and down to have them on here in Wigan but then lockdown came. The other bands I’m aware of too but not the solo artists you’ve mentioned.

Yeah Tinfoils are great. John Shuttleworth has been around for years i think. I can imagine he won't be to everyone's taste. Richard Carlson Band are actually named after the actor Richard Carlson, who was in The Creatire From the Black Lagoon. There is no Richard Carlson in that band! They're absolutely ace, they released their debut single a few weeks ago and I've had it on repeat.

I’ll be sure to listen to your recommendations, love finding new music to listen to.

We’re coming to the end of the interview now, I’ve just got a couple of questions. You’ll get two options, you pick one answer...

Winter or summer?

Sex Pistols or The Clash?

Roast dinner or Chinese?

Film or Book?

Winter

The Clash

Roast Dinner

Book

Thanks for having me! Hopefully see you soon

Thanks Ben for taking the time to chat to us. Hopefully we’ll cross paths at a gig soon.

If you want to listen to the band please go and follow them on social media and their music is on Spotify etc.