#tbh i never thought to check the askboxes on there so you can tell how much i've Only been on mobile as of late oops..... .

[flimsy-spine]

i didn't realize that being given ownership of the groupblogs meant that i could now read the asks sent there, and was like ?? who sent me an ask?? ... it was two years old and not sent to me.

[jovenshires]

💛Smoshblr December Asks Final Day💙

We‘ve done it! We’ve finally reached the end of this lil ask game and also the end of 2023! 🥳 Thank you so much for joining in on this, I truly appreciate it so much 🫶! I wish you a wonderful start into the new year and that all your hopes and dreams for 2024 will come true! ✨💞

But, since the year isn’t quite over yet, I thought this might be a nice time to reminisce a little bit. Therefore, the final question of the Smoshblr December Asks Game:

What are your favourite smosh-related memories of 2023? 💖

(no specific amount required for this one; and you can ofc also include older smosh memories, if you want to 🤗)

oh my god........ im emotional fr. this was so, so, SO much fun and stella, i will speak for EVERYONE you sent these asks to when i say that we are all so grateful to YOU for organizing it. you brought the community together in such an amazing way, asking us thought-provoking and interesting questions, a lot of which i never would have thought to ask. and yet i got to learn all my mutuals' answers anyway!!! it made me feel like i really got to know everyone, even the people im too scared to start a convo with bc i am a Coward. i love you, we all adore you, thank you SO much, and i cant wait to see where smoshblr goes in the new year now that we are all closer than ever <3<3<3<3<3

okay so...... okay okay okay okay HERE we go. im gonna put it under the cut bc this got SO long but if you want a tl;dr summary, please by all means go check out this video i made at the beginning of the month bc. it sums it up tbh.

making all of my amazing friends: i am literally. an emotional wreck just thinking ab this. anyway. i've already been sappy enough this year (from my christmas presents to my many many personal posts and asks that are just. me talking about how much i love these people), but i would still be remiss if i didn't mention my beautiful, wonderful friends. im not gonna tag them all here - it'd be too many and you all know who you are <3<3<3 - but to everyone i've dmed for hours on end, or talked to in replies, or mutuals i've never even spoken to at all, or anons who come into my askbox and just have the most wonderful interactions with me, i am so, so eternally grateful. i made new friends; i reconnected with one of my best friends in the WHOLE world; i met some people who i never would have spoken to otherwise and found such an incredible community. i love you all so so SO much (yes ALL of you even if you think im not talking ab you if you're reading this i AM), and i am so excited to see what happens with all of us next. love you all. mwah. <3

domo day/my birthday: oh my god. OHHHH my god. literally the fic that brought me back to this fandom. i am not crying its fine im FINE. domo - aka dancing on my own - was a passion project from the very start. i thought, 'well, no one will wanna read this niche lil fic that im writing just to deal with My very personal trauma about an rpf ship that no one cares about.' (mind you i started it before i even posted right side, so, like, i literally thought it was just me standing on a deserted island.) and then five or six months later... there we were. i posted it on my birthday (bc i Live for drama !) and god. the amount of love and support i got that day was... everything to me. when i said this was a passion project, i mean that it was truly one of the first things i sat down and wrote For Myself, without giving a fuck what anyone else would think. it was something i poured my heart and soul into because i needed to read it. and when other people started to reach out - telling me how much they related, how much they got from it, how much it meant to them. then there was the analyses of it from everyone,,,, not to mention the birthday love. my birthday is a HUGE thing for me, and, as i told you at the time, you were the very first person to wish me a happy birthday stella (with that incredible moodboard that i think of frequently........ the rat.........). and then kit went and published bad idea and gifted it to ME which was such an incredible and treasured gesture and... truly some of my irls forgot to wish me a happy birthday so. im just so honored and i love you all so much. thank you for loving me and my dearest darling daughter domo <333333

shaynse day: this literally isn't even about me, it's honestly about nat, but this changed my brain chemistry and i think everybody's tbh. it was the way that the MOMENT the love is blind video dropped, we all gathered around my blog to hold hands, sing kumbaya, and all hail the shaynse anon (aka now shaynse founder nat). they had their third eye OPEN. and everyone had to come check on them to make sure they were okay. that meant so much to me. not only did it mean that enough people were reading my blog that an anon had their own niche subset of a fan base, but it was truly like. one of the best displays of fandom togetherness i've ever seen. we were all so united that day. god bless november 19th, aka shaynse day, my FAVORITE national holiday.

gedits: i really Dont think i have to explain this one. this is one of my favorite bits (but also its not really a bit and i genuinely wanna fuck that old man). making thirst traps for garrett? oh my god. stroke of actual genius. once again another day we all came together, held hands, and decided we were ALL gonna be garrett fuckers. long live gedits. they will never stop and im NOT sorry about it.

the bsf fan art: i have literally never had fan art made for my fic before...... i screamed and cried and threw up when someone made fan art for the bed-sharing fic. furry-jackson is my hero and this fan art lives in my mind RENT FUCKING FREE. it truly imprinted itself on my brain and i think about it all the time. thanks so much to them for loving i could be the reason as much as i do <3333

the top ten dynamics poll: !!!!! my baby!!!! i truly thank you all so much for indulging me by voting in that silly lil poll. it was so SO interesting to see the way the dynamics stacked up. not to mention, it also got me into gif-making again!! that was the first time i'd made gifs in ages, especially gifs i was proud of. but i love that silly lil gif series so much, one of my favorite projects of the year, so thank you all <3

smoshblr december asks: i mean. i said it all up top, but it's worth mentioning again. this was so, so, SO much fun, and it must have been such hard work for you, and i am honored that you did all this work for US of all people when you are so busy and talented and working so hard just in like. YOUR LIFE. honestly, this whole section could just be called 'stella,' bc i am so, so grateful for you especially coming into my life this year. whether we're working together on fic or just chatting about our lives or shouting back and forth about why EVERY taylor swift song is in fact a spommy song, i am just so lucky to have you and i love you so, so much. you always tolerate my shenanigans and i am SO incredibly lucky to have you as a friend. anyway. yeah i love you and smoshblr december asks so there.

[spookybreadstick]

hello there! If its not a bother, have you any suggestedblogs / your fave or the writing blogs who you interact with the most that write for creepypastas too? :))

of course I can give you some suggestions!!! it’s not a bother :) 

these are all blogs that i really like & enjoy their content, I just sorted them into categories for your convenience <3 

- breadstick  🥖

CLASSIC FAVORITES (amazing & consistent work)

@creepy-love

love everything they do!! i may not write nsfw myself at the moment, but i will partake in reading some, and their stuff is top-notch! (never get down on yourself for any low note counts like in the past, you’re a talented writer!) {👀, 📩}

@maskyspunchingbag

l love everything they’ve written, and i think they’ve done a fantastic job with, from what I’ve seen, rising to the top of the creepypasta fandom very quickly. they’re very funny as well, which is an added bonus, {👀, 🤐}

@moving-wright-along

all of her hcs  are really great, but i am particulary fond of her story “bury me in your mind.” i love the thought of a pre-pasta Toby, and this is so well-written, I really enjoyed it! {📩}

@scary-lasagna

a stable of the creepypasta community. can’t have creepypasta without her, she carries this fandom on her back! {👀, 🤝}

@just-a-creep-babe

another staple of the creepypasta community who carries the fandom! i can’t say enough about how amazing this blog is! constantly churning out terrific content (mostly very nsfw) i reread their stuff all the time, and it’s probably the blog i go to the most tbh for rereading! {👀}

BLOGS SIMILAR TO ME (same “sweetheart” type style)

@faerienextdoor

sheer perfection!! everything they do is well-researched & thought out, long, and aesthetically pleasing. they seem like such a sweetheart, & i’m constantly impressed by their work {🤝, 📩}

@lovestruck-lasagna

i don’t deserve to be in the same category as such an amazing writer, but i do feel like we have similar styles. she’s extremely sweet and kind, and i love her humor!  i’m actually an undercover ‘customer’ of their work, and i have her stuff that’s she’s written for me bookmarked on my phone! {👀, 🤝,🤐,😔}

@undercooked-ravioloni

all of their stuff is sweet & well thought out. you can tell they take time to do the requests, and it really pays off! {🤝, 🤐}

@strawberrycigaretteaheago

they’re so cute! all of their stuff is extremely sweet and domestic and it’s great! {🤐}

@somewhat-crazy

amazing, incredible, showstopping, fantastic... she’s super cool & her writing is awesome! i admire the hard work she puts into her blog, she’s obviously very dedicated to her craft and i appreciate the time she takes to answer requests thoroughly and with a lot of love behind it  {📩}

UNDERRATED STARS (blogs that deserve more hype!)

@fekst-fucker

she’s terrific, and her writing is actually what really brought me into the idea of creepypasta writing! it made me fall in love with the characters again, and start thinking that maybe I could do this! they need more recognition for their amazing writing! {👀, 🤐}

@bigtittydemonwife

their stuff is really good! i love their story with Toby as a toad! it was very cute, and i could definitely see all of that happening given the circumstances. def could use more hype for their blog {📩,😔}

@anonymousstinkkat001

they try so hard with their blog & i wish more people would interact with them! they’re very nice, and although i’m not really into a/b/o, their stuff is pretty interesting and i know that’s some people’s thing so if you’re really into that stuff, look no further than here! {📩}

@queenofmandy 

she’s so great! there’s a lot of effort that goes into any writing she does, and i hope she never stops writing (don’t let any confidence issues slow you down, you’re very talented!) {📩}

@bioodorange

their stuff is darker than what I’d normally really enjoy, but I do enjoy theirs actually! some of their Toby hcs for his past really inspired my own ideas for his past {👀,🤝, 📩} i actually was a named anon on their blog a while back which helped me get the idea for the style of my own blog shush

- 

**KEY**

🤐 = askbox closed (respect if it’s closed & do not spam them, or die by my sword) *as of May 21st 2021, check again if it’s been more than a week*

📩 = askbox open *as of May 21st 2021, check again if it’s been more than a week*

👀 = willing to do NSFW 

🤝= willing to do matchups

😔 = may or may not be active (been two weeks since they posted; i didn’t include anyone who has gone more than 80 days inactive though) *as of May 21st 2021, check again if it’s been more than a week*

[reeeyachi]

W-HELLO I AM dropping in both ur askboxes to ask if u guys think that there's a possibility that killugon could always stay one-sided (killua never confessing, aro gon, or any scenario tbh)? - im asking u girls because u can provide an artistic/writer point of view - as an artist, wouldn't it feel wrong/incomplete to make a character fall in love with another only to be rejected and be told that they wanna stay platonic friends, when they have such a deep relationship and potential for romance?

HELLO DON’T MIND IF I DO. allow me put my "writer" hat on so that i can give you a very subjective yet creative short answer and a super long answer to this one. Short answer is, unfortunately (it breaks my heart), yes it is possible. Long answer is also yes but with explanation below:

ok i want to slice this ask piece by piece. let’s check possible endings to this relationship and try to fit them in hxh’s concept/context and togashi’s style of storytelling:

purely platonic / just friends;

one-sided love (vice versa killua & gon);

both in love, but won’t confess and will stay platonic;

both in love and will be together forever; and lastly

both in love and will be together for a long time but will break up

i know most of these sound disheartening for us but for me, as a writer, i like to have as many options as possible. especially for romance. because there’s so much character growth potential in this genre -- as what it would let you experience in real life. people learn so many lessons when and after falling in and out love and i like to think of this as one of togashi’s main considerations in writing a romance. most esp a romance that developed at a very young age between two boys.

explanation after the cut:

purely platonic / just friends - let’s just get this out of the way. the answer is a solid no. if i were to strip off my fangirl mask and put myself in togashi’s shoes, an author who goes out of his way to write about the LGBTQ+, it’s not possible. forget about this. i have your metas to back me up on this.

one-sided love (vice versa killua & gon) - ok this one’s interesting because it is possible. @sincerelysamedt has this amazing headcanon (that i can’t stop thinking about bcos it is so damned possible) about killua confessing to gon and gon rejecting him because, while he does love him, he thinks he doesn’t love in the same way killua does (which is romantically). if we are to put it in hxh canon context, it might actually fit in, but with a different scenario. okay so, after separating, togashi gives us the “little detours“ scene between gon and ging, and throws gon back to whale island basically back to square one -- suggesting that gon will ponder and will realize his feelings for killua in his time alone. but it also suggests that killua might take this chance to move on from gon, and that by the time they meet again, by the time gon finally tells him about how he feels about the both of them, killua’s feelings for him are long gone, and they mutually agree to stay just friends.

both in love, but won’t confess and will stay platonic - talk about funny and frustrating. slow burn gives me physical pain, but hiding of feelings when it’s too fucking obvious kills me. and i am certain togashi knows this. if you are a writer, you would know what your reader wants. you would know what they think of your characters. and sometimes, most of the time, to break the norm and stereotypes (and to break hearts and laugh evil laughs), writers will tend to NOT give you what you want. in this scenario, he gives us BOTH. and it just blows my mind how he already does it in the manga. i really like how togashi tells a story because he doesn’t really “tell“ per se. he “shows“ it. like, he doesn’t tell us that killua has feelings for gon but we SEE it. he doesn’t tell us that gon’s best detour is killua but we KNOW it. he gives readers the power to interpret his contexts without being evasive. so i think it is possible he might pull this shitty yet brilliant strategy until the end. an open-ended conclusion, an “it’s for me to know and for you to find out“, a giving the benefit of the doubt, something that will make you stare into the distance and feel complete and incomplete at the same damn time -- really, the best and worst kind of ending

both in love and will be together forever - YES. this will fit right in the hxh storyline because of the BUILD UP we’ve witness at the start of the story. i repeat, not in the middle, not at the latter episodes of the anime, but AT THE START of the freaking manga. if i were to just pull out manga panel’s of gon and killua from the moment they met, without the side quests, focusing only on their relationship, and arrange them in chronological order, i’ll have myself a good-written slow-burn romance. i don’t think togashi would want to throw the idea of them finally being together out of the window after all the build up he wrote between them. this is the ending that we want. and it’s likely togashi will give it to us BUT, as mentioned, as a writer of his caliber, he might just go apeshit and give us more after this which my last scenario suggests...

both in love and will be together for a long time but will break up in the end - thinking about this makes me sad. but it is possible that this can happen. gon and killua were 12y/o when they met. they’re 13-14y/o when they developed their feelings for each other. while yes, they may realize that being together would be the best decision to make when they meet again, given that they are growing boys with maturing emotional and intellectual capacities, they might later on decide that they’re better off as friends. being in a relationship is not all fluff and games. they will have problems, they will disagree and they will fight. through and through, they will develop their understanding of the world and of the people around them. heck, they might even meet new people they’re interested in. and togashi might give us this. before and after being together. he might code it as character growth, similar to what he showed us after CAA, but as adults. it’s a loop -- like how real-life romantic relationships play out. i personally like this idea because it suggests that there is more to their reach than just each other, and that they can grow on their own without depending on each other. BUT BUT BUT i strongly believe that togashi doesn’t intend this to happen given what i said about the build up and all. he MIGHT make this happen BUT in the end, gon and killua would still end up coming home to each other.

i’m not really sure of i answered your ask right because i said so many things and presented so many scenarios HAHA but to summarize, killua and gon are gay coded and they definitely have feelings for each other, however, it’s togashi’s thought process as a novelist that i’m not really sure how to decode. the way a good writer thinks is amazing. they’re crazy genius yet so, so unpredictable and fucking poetic. he might give us what we want, but he might also fuck around and explore all possible scenarios of a slow-burn relationship before they actually get together, like the true shoujo mangaka that he is

it’s just a matter of time, really :3

[ziracona]

claud/jake/dwight anon here! maybe i’ll just go by wisteria since i’ll be popping up in your askbox from time to time :D

shippy hcs would be wonderful! i was referring to them as an established poly relationship post fic; i actually saw the comment where you were talking about how claudette can fit into different relationships and thought that was so fitting (and such a testament to the beauty of her character, but thats another long winded ask to send another day). once again, thanks for putting out ILM into this world. it’s a joy to read, reread, and treasure <3

Alrighty Wisteria! 

Also I’m glad because I initially read it that way and was halfway to answering when I was like ‘wait,’ but my instincts were correct haha.

Claudette/Jake/Dwight is an interesting poly ship. It’s funny, because obviously both of them love her and she loves both of them. Just, I don’t think her priority has ever been having a romantic relationship, and neither has theirs. I also think it just kind of...wouldn’t occur to Dwight or Jake that that was a thing. Like, they know about polyamoury, they know it exists. But I feel like straight up there’d like, be an escape anniversary party or something, and she gives them both super heart felt gifts she clearly loved to make, and they’re both touched, give hugs, pass her their own sweetly made things, last little group hug, she’s like “Love you guys” and as she runs off to go give out other gifts to other loved ones, Jake’s super sincerely like “You too,” and Dwight’s like *looks at him, looks at her, smiles* “Yeah. Love you.” and she’s gone, and someone who they were chatting with before (probably Meg, Nea, or Ace) would joke something like “Why didn’t you two just also marry Claudette? You’d be such a happy trio” casually offhand, and they’d be like “Haha yeah!  ... ... ... haha...yeah.... ? (O_O);” type thing that would have to happen, because otherwise they just like, wouldn’t think about it. 

Once they did, though, I feel like it would definitely be the same event that clued them both in, so they’d both be like “Hmmm” at the same time, and pick up on that, and talk first, and be like “...Yeah, I mean. Maybe? But would she even be comfortable with that? Is it weird?” And Jake, who has the most secure identity in this area, would not really have any issue from the get-go and would mostly be like “Boy am I stupid for this never occurring to me once”. Dwight would need more time to think and talk stuff through and figure himself out, but is a lot more comfortable than he was. Claudette would be the last one. They’d both approach her at some point, and it would be incredibly awkward and kind of a disaster despite the fact they practiced and thought they had a gameplan, and she’s just like, “What? ...What?” and confused, and she’s a very worry-prone person, so she’d be like “Oh no, did I do something? Is this bad? Do they just feel bad for me? Since I’m not dating and they want me to feel included? Is this a bad idea? What do I even actually want?” and since she’s got the least experience dating, she’d take the longest to think things through. Would talk to Meg, and Quentin, and Philip, and her parents, and Ace. And they’d all help, but Meg would be the most help. Because Meg’s simple. She’d just say, “Well, do you want to be dating them both?” and Claudette would be like, “Well. I don’t know. I love them. And it might be nice to have a romantic relationship with someone I love someday. But I don’t know if this is how I want that, or if it would be good, because I have no idea what this would look or feel like,” and Meg would be like, “Well then why don’t you just like, go on a few dates/hangs like you’re dating, and see if it’s fun and good, or uncomfortable and bad, and if you three all feel like it fits and makes life even better, go for it, and if it turns out to be a mistake like that time Jake and I really thought we’d get some hella traction making out, then say ‘Well that was awful lol. Friends it is!’ and Susie and I will take all of you for drunk lazer-tag.”

And that works, because well, it’s more sensible than any amount of introspection without experience, or thinking, or worrying is. So they give it a go for like a week, and it’s awkward as hell for like the first fifteen minutes, but this is a trio of people who’ve known each other so long and been so fundamentally entrenched in each others’ lives for years, and love and trust each other so completely and deeply, it really can’t be that awkawrd, and everyone has prepped best they can, and kind of laugh at themselves, and just like, spend the day at theme park, and get food, and laugh and talk about life like always, but just this time with a kind of romantic shade, and it’s nice. And there’s a lot of days like that--not all so big, more just, at home, hanging out, doing whatever. And it is weird, because none of them has done this before, but. It’s also fun. And none of them have any weird kind of favoritism insecurities, because they were already pretty well and equally entrenched in each others’ lives before, and it’s fun. Jake is strategic because he’s kind of the planning mind behind this, and gets advice from Meg, and they marathon a lot of Leverage with only Jake knowing this is a sneaky ploy to help the other two get more comfortable, because there’s just not a ton of good filmic poly trio rep, but damn if that show hasn’t got a great one. 

I think the trial period just kind of hits the end of it’s week and Jake and Dwight are like “So do you want to keep going?” and she’s like “...Yeah. : ) “ and so they do, and it’s like that for a while. They all move at their own paces, and in their own clearly discussed (and, as well as they know each other, usually already mostly known) comfort zones, and it’s fun, and nice. It also helps that everyone else is not just supportive and chill, but most of them are like, goofily into it.

They’ve been dating for like, four months before any of them explicitly calls it that officially. But it’s cute. Jake wants it to be official so he gets people anniversary gifts and then is kind of embarrassed but more pleased with himself, and it’s very cute and goes over well.

Everyone puts in work to figuring out how to keep this healthy and good, since none of them had a lot of preexisting knowledge for being with multiple people. They all do that their own way. Claudette spends hours and hours doing research online and checking for tips from people online, and really works hard to be a good girlfriend, and it’s very sweet. Meg and especially Quentin both have no real idea how to help her, but clock a lot of hours trying and doing pretty good. So secondarily do Nancy and Susie.

I’m pretty sure eventually they’d have another wedding, legally official or not--and not because any of them really feel a need to, but because they think it would be fun and Claudette should get to dress up too, and tbh it would be cute. I feel like Meg, Ace, and Susie are major factors pushing for this. 

All of their parents think it’s a little weird, but their kids were missing for like 4 years getting tortured in hell, and they’re all reasonable people; they don’t say shit. Also, they all like all the other parties involved, so they’re like “Rat’s don’t understand these things” (this is a Muppet Christmas Carol inside joke I use all the time even though only like 4 people get it but I hope it makes some sense from context lol), but figure they don’t really have to to be happy their kids are happy and loved and doing well.

Meg is like “Fuck why didn’t we think of this. Why have I been supporting it when I could have nabbed her for me and Susie?” and Quentin doesn’t say shit but he thinks very loudly, “I know, right? Nancy and me are over here like ‘same hat’ fml,” but genuinely they’re very happy for the three of them and with the relationships they have. There’s just a lot of love to go around.

While there’s probably some kind a wedding eventually, definitely about as soon as they start dating, Jake and Dwight start calling her their wife. She’s flustered and like “But I’m note! I’m just your girlfriend.” and Dwight’s like “Yeah, but that makes it sound weirdly unbalanced,” and Jake who looked this up for this moment is like, “Well, by Quebec common law marriage standards, you actually are our wife--we cohabitated for over three years in the realm, so,” and Dwight’s like “whoa for real?” and she’s just like : o   But it kinda helps and she accepts it. The downside is Nea hears the story and tells Meg and together they start just fuckin calling all their realm friends their spouses goofily 24/7 when they want shit like “David, my wonderful strong husband, can you pleeeeease get me a sodie from the fridge? : D <3″ and it’s very funny but it’s also pure chaos. Like, so much more than usual.

[janiedean]

Saying Kit/Emilia are on the same acting level as Alfie is a big insult tbh. Alfie didn't spent years acting his ass of portraying 3 Theon/Reek to be put on the same level as them. It's also an insult to Lena's acting.

anon

for the fucking good love of it

now I know I am gonna be rude but fuck that noise I’ve been nice until now

A MONTH AGO SOMEONE CAME INTO MY INBOX TRASHING ON KIT TWICE IN THE SAME DAY AND I LOST MY SHIT BECAUSE

IHAVEBEENSAYINGILIKEKIT’SACTINGGENUINELYANDUNIRONICALLY

*SINCE FUCKING SEASON FIVE*. FIVE. AND IT’S AN OPINION I HAD TO DEFEND MORE THAN ONCE BUT NEVER MIND.

I’m GONNA PUT IT EXTRA LARGE JUST IN CASE YOU CAN’T READ.

I don’t particularly like emilia’s but I thought she was pretty much okay in solo so she obv can do better than got but the point is

IF YOU *KNOW* I LIKE KIT’S ACTING AND NGL I ENJOY WATCHING HIS PERFORMANCE MORE THAN I ENJOY WATCHING LENA’S BECAUSE I CAN’T EVEN STAND TO LOOK AT CERSEI THESE DAYS NEVER MIND THE ACTING SHE CAN BE THE BEST ACTRESS IN THE WORLD I STILL WOULD RATHER WATCH KIT JON SNOW-ING FOR A FULL HOUR THAN LENA SAYING A WORD BECAUSE I HONESTLY CAN’T LOOK AT CERSEI WITHOUT WANTING TO VOMIT BUT IT’S FINE WHATEVER IT’S ALL ABOUT FINE ACTING TM IT CAN’T BE PERSONAL PREFERENCE

WHYDOYOUTHINKIT’SOKAYTOCOMEINTOMYASKBOXTELLINGMEKIT’SACTINGSUCKS

NO HONESTLY now I’m capslocking without limit but honestly WHY. no. EXPLAIN ME WHY. I’ve had this discussion AT LEAST TEN TIMES but it’s not even close to it, I don’t make a mystery that I think kit’s a pretty good actor - not on the same level as some of his colleagues but still good and I’ve seen him in other things and let me tell you imo he was better in brimstone than alfie was in john wick IF YOU REALLY WANT MY HONEST OPINION even if I also think alfie’s better than him in GOT but never mind - SO WHY THE FUCK DO YOU THINK IT’S FINE TO COME HERE AND PUT IT IN THESE TERMS?????

No, honestly. PLEASE send me another anon and tell me why because I’d like to know if y’all have taken me for the fucking cat or something because hey you can tell your cat whatever and he’s going to listen without replying, or if you took me for the fucking wall or your free therapist or your bff or whatever.

I HAVE MY PREFERENCES AND YOU FUCKING KNOW THEM BECAUSE AGAIN, I HAVE BEEN SAYING I LIKE HIS ACTING FOR FOUR FUCKING YEARS NOW and when it comes to emilia I honestly don’t care enough to complain about it outside of maybe the liveblog. WHY. DO YOU FEEL THE NEED TO SEND ME THIS KIND OF ASK knowing you’re trashing on someone I like and knowing I wildly disagree with you? because if you didn’t notice sorry but YOU COULD HAVE CHECKED THE DAMNED TAGS where I put everything.

INCLUDING MY OPINION ON KIT’S FUCKING ACTING.

hey, if you HAPPENED TO MISS IT:

this is why you’re wrong at least re kit

this is the last time someone brought out the IT’S AN INSULT TO ALFIE AND LENA DISCOURSE

this is the second to last last time someone brought out that same discourse

this is the last time someone went trashing on a movie I like because they hate emilia who’s in it before it even came out when I said I was excited for it

AND THIS IS WHAT Y’ALL MADE ME POST AFTER ALL OF THE ABOVE.

now: read the links if you missed them and then come back and please tell me why the fuck you woke up this morning and thought ‘oh hey it’s a lovely sunny day, let’s send tumblr user janiedean the umpteenth ask on about how much I hate an actor she likes a lot and an actress she doesn’t give a shit enough about to complain and see how much she tries to be diplomatic without telling me explicitly to just fuck off already, how fun is that???!’, because that’s how it fucking sounds at this point.

I could also rant you for an entire day about how alfie never got the screentime he deserved and has a what is objectively a secondary role at that point so he worked his ass off but he also doesn’t have to carry the entire thing on his shoulders while kit’s been spending seven seasons doing his stuntwork, actually working at improving and if you could actually get the ham from your eyes you’d notice, IMPROVING THE SCRIPT HIMSELF WHEN HE THOUGHT IT WAS OOC AND HE COULD GET AWAY WITH IT AND HE ACTUALLY READ ALL THE BOOK CANON (while alfie and lena didn’t, not that I blame them but kit and gwen are about the only two major-ish actors who actually read the entire thing in the entire cast and it counts for something) AND PRETTY MUCH SHOULDERING 70% OF THIS CLUSTERFUCK HIMSELF but never mind that, because you obviously don’t care and I’m not even obliged to do it.

but: again, since I’m tired of being diplomatic when you are rude in the first place - bc sorry I DON’T KNOW YOU and you doing this is basically coming into my house barging the door and informing me of a thing I don’t care for - I’ll be rude again: I DON’T CARE. YOU HATE KIT? YOU HATE EMILIA?

I DON’T FUCKING CARE, I ACTUALLY DISAGREE, I DON’T OWE YOU TO BE NICE TO YOU IF YOU ARRIVE HERE AND TELL ME THIS KIND OF STUFF WHEN YOU *KNOW* WHAT I THINK and not even doing it half-nicely, like this is straight up rude because you’re basically telling me that my opinion (ie: kit’s a good actor) is an insult to another actor whose work I love (alfie, or did you forget the time I spent a month putting together signatures to bring him a book with compliments from people who like his acting? BECAUSE I DID, fuck’s sake) without even saying hi or bothering to put it nicely, and it’s rude af because you’re basically assuming that since I’m here and I’m nice to everyone then I’ll listen to whatever fucking thing passes through your head.

I AM NOT YOUR BEST FRIEND, I’M NOT YOUR MOTHER, I’M NOT YOUR THERAPIST, I’M NOT YOUR CAT AND THIS IS MY DAMNED SPACE AND IF YOU HAVE TO COME IN IT TO INSULT THINGS I LIKE WHEN YOU KNOW I LIKE THEM YOU CAN CLICK UNFOLLOW AND IGNORE ME FOR THE NEXT TEN YEARS, THANK YOU.

and since this is the fifth time I had to tell y’all this maybe if I put everything in large af capslock it’s the one time you get it.

I didn’t want to get to this point but y’all brought me to it, thank you.

and before you decide whether you want to unfollow me or whether you want to check on your damned manners before you send people things - again, I’m nice and I don’t mind talking to anyone on here but some basic modicum of respect for my ABSOLUTELY NOT UNKNOWN OPINIONS would be nice -, feel free to send me another ask where you tell me why the fuck you thought sending me this ask was a good idea GIVEN ALL OF THE ABOVE.

I’m listening. No, really.

and if your reply is ‘omg you got hysterical over it chill’, you obviously haven’t read the part where I said I’ve been having this discourse for four years and I think I made clear where I stand on.

again: if I could fucking lie for years through all of high school to all my rl friends about how much I fucking hate harry potter and everything connected to it and if I could watch the movies with them even when they knew I don’t like it and they still insisted anyway and when I don’t go on tumblrs of people who like HP telling them I think their favorite book sucks because I know shitting over what people like is rude and gets them down and eventually ends up with general embarrassment because it’s not nice to have someone talking shit about something you like in front of you, Y’ALL CAN BE HALFWAY CONSIDERATE AND STOP SENDING ME ASKS ABOUT HOW MUCH YOU HATE SOMETHING I LIKE AND ABOUT HOW MUCH MY OPINIONS ARE *INSULTS*.

thanks for coming to my fucking ted talk. fuck’s sake.

[babydollsmadd]

hey what's up it's me, just passing through your askbox to be super nosy and send u these for the madd ask meme: 2, 7, 17, 21, 22, 25, 40 they're a lot and probably the most invasive??? im so sorry, feel free to ignore the ones you dont wanna answer tbh 😅

You can be as nosy as you want lmao, I love doing these!! It’ll probably be super long tho so apologies for that. To make this a little easier, I’ll exclude my parame from this (also for personal reasons) and only talk about my two main paras: Zazie & Tatsu.

ENJOY MY RAMBLING 💀

2. Do your daydreams get violent? How do you feel about them? How do you respond to them?

Violence is like, one of the most common themes in my daydreams. It ranges from the occasional fight or accident to actual murder and abuse. Mostly abuse tho. This sounds bad, but after so many years of constantly having such violent daydreams, I’ve become kinda numb to it. In a fucked up way, it gives me comfort. Because in some fucked up way, I chose this. Being hella masochistic and broken and dependent on Zazie, my parame doesn’t actually realize what’s happening to her is bad and absolutely not normal. She just goes with it. She doesn’t know better. She enjoys it, to a certain degree. I’m not sure what a “””normal””” person would think of this, I just don’t know how weird it seems to others, but to me, it doesn’t actually seem abnormal to have such thoughts. It’s just how it is, I just happen to have a violent mind.

7. How do you feel about your characters/paras? Have you ever fallen in love with them?

I wish there was another word for it. Saying “I love them” feels like such an understatement. Zazie & Tatsu mean everything to me. And I know how bad this sounds, considering I actually have a boyfriend of almost 3 years (which seems to be a rarity for people with MaDD). Now, don’t get me wrong - I do love my boyfriend. I live with him and he helps me so much with everything and he’s just a great person overall. It’s just that I feel a lot different about my paras. It’s not a matter of “being in love” with them or something, it’s that they’ve been with me through everything that has happened. It’s on another level, something that goes far beyond what happens between people. People can’t see what’s going on inside my head, I can choose what part of my mind I’m showing them, they’re their own people, they can disappear at any moment. They’re temporary. My paras, are not. Throughout all my life, they’ll be with me, no matter what happens. They cannot leave me because they literally live inside my head. So yes, I do love them, but not like someone who loves another person.

17. Do your paras have tragic backstories? Will you share a few?

Achievement unlocked: The Tragic Backstory ™No but seriously, not one of my paras has had a normal or easy life. It’s always tragic and complicated, some more, some less. It also slightly changes depending on the story I’m doing. Since listing them all would just be too much, lemme tell you a little about Zazie, my favorite dickhead. His parents didn’t want him. In their eyes, he was just a nuisance to them. So they abused him. From the moment he was born, they neglected him, hit him, yelled at him and not once gave him the love and attention he needed. He was still quite young when he was taken away from them and taken in by a new family. He never understood why this super rich couple adopted him, but as long he did as he was told, they gave him everything he wanted. When he got into his teenage years, he learned that they’d do literally anything to keep him from misbehaving. So whenever they wanted him to be quiet or polite or whatever, he’d manipulate them into giving in to him. He grew up into a horrible human, always manipulating people, getting into fights and generally just being pretty rude. He started taking drugs, smoking, drinking and sleeping around a lot. The only reason he hasn’t gone completely insane is Tatsu, his best friend. Tatsu has his own problems as well, but is far more stable compared to Zazie. He doesn’t want to admit it, but losing his best friend is like his greatest fear - so sometimes he does some questionable things to make sure Tatsu doesn’t leave. Zazie is incredibly smart, he knows exactly what he’s doing and what consequences his actions have. He just chooses to ignore them because, well, he doesn’t care much about other people or the world. He’s a sadistic, narcissistic asshole and I love him, alright.

21. Have your characters commit crime? Have they been to jail? Are they legally innocent? Are they socially innocent?

I mean……. if you consider theft, murder, drug dealing and assassination a crime…… then yes lmao. They’ve done some pretty fucked up shit, and have definitely been questioned and followed by police and others, but they never actually have been to jail. I’m just not very interested in that. They would absolutely not be legally or socially innocent. You just don’t have enough proof to lock them away. 🙃

22. Do your paras often find themselves in dangerous situations? How/why? Do they go looking for trouble? Does trouble look for them?

Yes. All the time. Mainly Zazie. He gets in a lot of trouble, constantly, be it his own fault or because of someone else. He loves danger. It makes him feel alive. That’s why he’s always living life on the edge, it gives him a rush and he’s addicted to it. He loves driving too fast, taking drugs that give him that feeling, stealing things, getting into fights - whatever makes him feel good. Tatsu doesn’t necessarily go out looking for trouble, but always ends up in it because of his best friend. He doesn’t mind tho, he gets the same exciting rush from it. They especially love racing, and often fight over which one they’re gonna take - supercar or motorbike. They absolutely love racing through the city and on the highway, the more dangerous, the better. Bonus points if they have to escape from police. Being such a damn good driver, Zazie wins most of the time. 🚨

25. Has a para ever made you physically cry?

Heck yeah. Wait that shouldn’t be something good… ANYway, I’m hella emotional and even just start tearing up when I don’t get my favorite ice cream or something ridiculous like that. Now imagine me killing off a para or Zazie abusing someone again or taking too many drugs and completely losing it. Daydreaming is really intense for me, so I often just start crying (or laughing), I make weird faces and all that shit. Crying doesn’t necessarily mean I’m sad, it simply means I’m feeling too much of an emotion in that moment. I don’t really show negative emotions irl (except for frustration), I have trouble showing happiness, so I try to keep things in check and preferably far away from me. When I daydream, I can let go of that, and then I just happen to cry a lot. 🌊

40. Do you do research for your daydreams? How much? How often? How deep?

I do a lot of research, actually! It really depends on the story, but I mostly look up cities and street systems, buildings and interior. I pick what I like and what fits, and so create my own cities and maps. It goes pretty in depth, to a point where I know exactly where things stand and what objects are in the rooms, even if it’s a piece of glass that’s behind a closet somewhere. When my story involves anything that I don’t have knowledge of, I research it as well. That can be super/hypercars, certain industries like music or YouTube, how the mafia works, foods from around the world, disorders and illnesses - I’ll just research whatever I need for my story or world.

Whew!! That was long, but not as long as expected. Kinda proud of myself for not rambling on about random details too much. Thank you so much for asking! And again, feel free to be nosy whenever you want lmao.